


Forever and Always

by cls2256



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Book 3: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Book 4: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Book 7: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Character Death, Drama, F/M, Hogwarts, Love, Magical Bonds, Military, Ministry of Magic, Non-Canon Relationship, Older Man/Younger Woman, Order of the Phoenix - Freeform, Rape/Non-con Elements, Recreational Drug Use, Romance, Sex, Smut, Suspense, Wandless Magic, Werewolves, soul mates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-06-24 12:20:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 64
Words: 275,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15630576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cls2256/pseuds/cls2256
Summary: Her mother is a key member of the Order of the Phoenix from the first wizarding war. Her father is an American muggle whose knowledge of the wizarding world was obliviated for his own protection. Mia Roswell is bold, cheeky, and intelligent; she returns to Hogwarts for her 7th year, and finds herself head over heels in a forbidden romance.As Voldemort rises to power, his supporters are seeking revenge for their own personal agendas, making herself and the people she loves a target. As she navigates through love and loss with an adoring werewolf at her side, she learns that her magical ability is more powerful than anyone could’ve anticipated.





	1. chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!  
> This fanfic begins when the Prisoner of Azkaban book starts, and follows the book's canon story events loosely to integrate OCs and their story arcs. Mia, the main character, was an idea that I just couldn't shake from my brain, and I hope you all enjoy her as much as I enjoy writing her.  
> Mia is of age at any time of some hanky panky (18) so there is no underage issue here.

As Mia Roswell walked through Kings Cross station on September the First, excitement and relief flooded through her as she was about to begin her 7th year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. She had just spent half of the summer with her father in Florida, an American muggle who is a member of the US Air Force. He was stationed in the gulf coast area, which wasn’t a bad place to spend the summer abroad. Mia loved getting to see her father, but life on a military base was restrictive, and she had to maintain a lie about her life when talking to her father. Her parents met in a coffee shop when her father, John, was stationed in the UK. They fell in love rather quickly, and had Mia shortly after their marriage. Her mother, Susan, a talented witch who was aiding in the defeat of Lord Voldemort, feared for her muggle husband and half-blood daughter’s life. She was a strong member of the Order of the Phoenix, a resistance group founded by Albus Dumbledore, which put her family in the middle of the war. Susan was so afraid after a death eater came knocking and tortured John while 4 year old Mia hid behind the sofa that she performed a memory charm on him, making him believe they had a rocky marriage, and forgetting that she and Mia were witches. He retreated back to America with Mia in tow, and began life as a single father. It pained Susan to see her family go half way across the world, but she felt it was the only way to keep them safe, as she was too valuable a member of the Order of the Phoenix to leave the war.

Mia stayed with her dad until she was 7, when her magical nuances became more than coincidences. Susan had to memory charm John again, forgetting the objects flying across the room or the lights flickering when Mia was upset. Susan felt safe bringing Mia home with her since the war was over, but by this point, John had fallen in love and was to marry another woman, and she couldn’t bear to break up his happiness. He married a woman, Miranda, that Mia really liked and enjoyed spending time with her when she came to America to visit. Mia wanted them to know about what she was, wanting to tell them all about Hogwarts on her summer holidays, but her mother forbade her from telling her father and stepmother about what she was. It was the hardest secret she had to keep, but her mother insisted it was for the best. Miranda passed away from breast cancer when Mia was in her 3rd year, having to miss a month of school to travel to America while she was in hospice care. Mia told Miranda while she was on her deathbed about her school, who she was and the things she learned at Hogwarts, but Miranda just laughed it off, thinking Mia was telling her a good story to ease her pain. Mia wasn’t allowed to use magic outside of school until she was 17, but she so desperately wanted to show Miranda a spell or two. She knew if she did, she’d get a violation from the Ministry and her mother would’ve had her head, but to this day Mia carried the regret of not being able to show Miranda who she really was. Mia’s 18th birthday was in 3 days’ time, so she had been legally allowed to use magic outside of school for the last year, but her mother still fought her on telling her father.

As Mia approached the barrier to platform 9 ¾, her mother gave her a big hug and kiss, tears in her eyes.

“Oh, my sweet girl is a 7th year already!!”

Mia rolled her eyes- her mother had this reaction every time she sent her off to school. Her mother could be a touch overbearing, she was very protective of Mia and very strict about studies. Susan was so proud when Mia was sorted into Ravenclaw, as this had been Susan’s house as well, but the pressure to follow in her mother’s footsteps was steep. Mia knew that she had disappointed her mother when she didn’t make prefect in her 5th year, let alone Head Girl, and felt that put more pressure on her to excel in her classes. She had obtained O.W.Ls in all her classes, continuing on to N.E.W.T. level, but it never seemed to be enough. Susan had given her the usual run down of her expectations for Mia’s grades for the year, but she also was nagging her to keep an eye out in case the recent escapee from Azkaban, Sirius Black, showed up in Hogsmeade or near the castle

“You need to be careful, he was convicted for killing 13 people, one of which being his best friend. He fooled all of us into thinking he was a good person, while the whole time he was working for Voldemort.” She had told her, more than once, since he was found to be missing from his cell in Azkaban.

Wizards didn’t escape from Azkaban, it hadn’t been done before, so the fact that Black did this was terrifying and mystifying at the same time. She hugged her mother and said goodbye, and walked through the barrier.

As Mia entered platform 9 ¾ she heard her best friend, Penelope Clearwater, calling after her. “Mia! Mia! AMELIA ROSWELL!” she was yelling, running to trying to get Mia’s attention.

“Geez Penny, I hear you!” Mia giggled and hugged her friend, whom she barely got to speak to this summer.

“How was your summer? It killed me not to send you an owl; however you could’ve picked up the telephone once in a while! I have so much to talk to you about!” Penelope exclaimed.

Penelope was muggle born, having a telephone at home, but John was always so concerned about long distance telephone bills she kept her calls to once a week to her mother. Susan hated the telephone, but had to keep one around for reasons such as that. Mia had opened her mouth to answer when Penelope’s boyfriend, Percy Weasley came jogging up to them.

“Hi Penny; Mia” he said as he nodded towards Mia and kissed Penelope on the cheek.

Mia rolled her eyes; she never really cared for a goody two shoes like Percy, but he seemed to make Penelope happy so she usually tried to keep the eye rolling to a minimum in front of her.

“Hey Percy” Mia said, doing her best to sound pleasant “Ready for your new position?”

She regretted bringing up the fact that Percy was Head Boy the moment the sentence left her lips. Percy stood up a little straighter and beamed at the mention of his position and begin to ramble on and on about how he was going to make Hogwarts better during his tenure. His Head Boy badge pinned proudly to his chest, it gleamed silver in the fluorescent lighting of the train station. As Mia spaced out and only pretended to listen to him, she looked around at all the other Hogwarts students preparing to board the train. A couple posters were hanging from the support beams around the platform with a mugshot of Sirius Black. There were posters all over the wizarding world, he even made the muggle news and was tagged as ‘armed and dangerous’. A few feet away from them were Percy’s family, all crowded together and impossible to overlook with their flaming red hair. Harry Potter and Hermione Granger were tagging along with the crowd of redheads that Percy was now walking back towards to scold them for not loading their belongings onto the train fast enough.

“The Hogwarts express leaves at 11:00 SHARP. Hurry up now so I don’t have to explain to Professor McGonagall why you aren’t at the feast!” he called after his siblings in a huff.

Penelope just giggled and followed along, enjoying seeing Percy in his element. Across from them were Draco Malfoy and his gang of cronies picking on a 2nd year Hufflepuff that was trying to lift his truck that was three times larger than himself. Mia rolled her eyes at the gang of 3rd year Slytherins; they were the most annoying group of so-called hot shots that think they ruled Hogwarts already. Oh, to be 13 again.

* * *

Once on the train, Mia situated herself in a train car with Penelope, Percy, and Oliver Wood, who had his head buried so far into his quidditch magazine you’d think he was suffocating. Everyone knew that Wood ate slept and breathed quidditch. Penelope and Percy were reading a book together, giggling at each other as they snuggled up in the booth. _Disgusting_ , Mia thought to herself as she rolled her eyes for the millionth time that day, and popped her earphones in to listen to music. Her dad had gotten her a new pair of headphones and Walkman for her early birthday present, so she popped in a cassette and zoned out staring at the rushing landscape passing by.

After a couple hours, the weather had started to change and get dark and rainy. Mia was on her 3rd cassette, Wood was asleep snoring next to her with his quidditch magazine in his lap, and Percy went to patrol the first years train cars to see if he had any Head Boy duties that he could attend to.

“Wow the weather is really looking rough out there” said Penelope, a little concerned. “I just hope that the rain stops before we get to Hogwarts so we don’t get soaked looking for our trunks.”

Just then, the train stopped suddenly and the lights went out. The entire train felt like an ice box. She began to feel dreadful, as if something was sucking all the happiness out of her. She could only see herself in the moonlight coming through the window, her breath visible in the air. All her sad and horrible memories throughout her life flooded to the surface, making her feel like she wanted to cry into nonexistence. She remained still for what felt like ages, and then the lights came back on and the train felt warmer again. She heard voices outside the train car, hearing people saying “Harry Potter fainted! He just collapsed!” and “what were they doing here?” By this point Percy had returned, and was fawning over Penelope, checking if she was alright. Wood lay in the same position he was in before, snoring away, completely unaware of what just happened. Mia stood in the doorway to her train car and saw a man in tattered robes walking up the aisle to the conductor’s booth. His presence caught Mia off guard while she watched him walk past her. He was handsome; tall with a muscular build and sandy brown hair peppered with just a couple grays. His sweater was faded, and his robes looked tattered and old, looking like they were hand sewed in a couple spots that may have torn at some point.

“Percy, who was that man that walked by?” Mia asked, as she kept her eye on the conductor’s booth, waiting for the man to reemerge.

“That’s Professor Lupin- he’s the new defense against the dark arts professor”.

After about a minute of lingering in the doorway, Professor Lupin returned and was walking down the hallway. “Excuse me, Professor, what happened with the train a few minutes ago?” Mia asked, trying her best to sound calm and collected.

Professor Lupin stopped, and locked eyes with her for half a second before speaking. Mia felt a jolt of what felt like electricity run through her. His light blue eyes looking almost gray in the lighting of the hallway.

“it was a dementor, one of the guards of Azkaban, searching the train for Sirius black. It’s gone now so you don’t have to worry.” Lupin said, now looking at the group, with a confident smile. “we should be arriving in Hogsmeade any time now, I’d change into your school robes if I were you.”

His eyes locked again with Mia’s just a little bit longer than she was anticipating, which made her heart flutter and her palms start to sweat. As Lupin began walking down the corridor, she shook off her strange reaction to him and grabbed her robes and headed for the girls bathroom to change.

* * *

When Mia walked into the Great Hall, she was overwhelmed by the delicious smell of roast chicken and mashed potatoes. Any feast at Hogwarts was always one to look forward to. She took a seat at the Ravenclaw table next to Penelope, grateful that Percy was a Gryffindor and wouldn’t be sitting with them during the opening feast. He was too busy playing his role of Head Boy to even come over and talk to them, but Penelope didn’t seem to mind and Mia was thrilled. Percy was a nice guy, but so pretentious it made Mia want to gag. Percy’s brothers all had a knack for getting themselves in trouble, which Mia found to be a little more interesting than perfect Head Boy.

After the sorting hat and Dumbledore’s welcome speech, the feast began. While Mia was helping herself to a third serving of mashed potatoes, her eyes kept returning to the mysterious Professor Lupin, who sat among the rest of the staff, standing out for his faded, tattered robes compared to the other teachers looking crisp and freshly pressed. Mia wondered his story, why his robes looked the way they did and how he would be as her new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher. She had had a new teacher each year in that class, the last few being complete busts. Many students believed the position was cursed. While Mia was staring at Lupin for the 6th time during that feast, his eyes turned to her and locked her gaze for a couple seconds, until she turned her eyes downward towards her mashed potato mountain and didn’t dare look back up for the rest of the feast. _He knows you were looking. He looked right into your eyes. How long did he know you were staring??_ Mia asked herself in embarrassment. Her palms had that familiar sweatiness to them as they did when talking to the professor on the train. She chalked it up to new teacher nerves and her own general nosiness, and scooped herself a 4th helping of potatoes.

* * *

Lupin was hunched over his desk, attempting to prepare his first Defense Against the Dark Arts lessons, but kept finding himself distracted thinking of the mysterious Ravenclaw girl that he found himself wanting to look at. He didn’t know her name, just her house based on the blue and bronze accents to her school robes that he saw her wearing. She looked to be older, most likely a 7th year, with beautiful black hair that cascaded down to the middle of her back that perfectly complimented her porcelain skin. Not that he was looking. _Remus, you can’t get distracted by every pretty girl you lay eyes on; especially ones at least 15 years younger_ He thought as he fidgeted with his quill instead of writing lesson notes. He felt a strange connection when he saw her on the train, looking into her hazel eyes that he could still picture when he closed his eyes. He shook his head and forced himself to focus on the task at hand. He was very excited to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts this year, and he couldn’t let himself get caught up in thinking of a student. He had the knowledge and experience, and needed this job more than he cared to admit to himself.

* * *

Mia was getting ready for her first Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson when she felt butterflies in her stomach. The idea of seeing the handsome, mysterious professor was exciting and nerve wracking, but she tried to shake off the feeling.

 _You’re just going to class, don’t make it weird._ She thought as she looked in the mirror to inspect her uniform. Mia was shorter, only about 5’3”. Her sweater was a perfect fit for her petite frame, her blue and bronze Ravenclaw tie nestled perfectly around her collar, but her shoes that had to wear with their uniform were less than to be desired. Mia had hated these shoes for 7 years, but at least they were comfortable. She slipped on her Ravenclaw robe, fluffed her long, dark hair and headed out of Ravenclaw tower.

When Mia walked into the classroom, Lupin caught sight of her almost immediately. _It’s her_ he thought, and they locked eyes for just a moment. Mia broke her stare when she realized he was staring back, a nervous jolt running through her body. She shuffled into her seat next to Penelope, and rolled her eyes when she started talking about the adorable thing Percy said to her at breakfast.

“Ok class, welcome to another year at Hogwarts. I am Professor Remus Lupin, your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. Today we are going to start with a lesson that hopefully Professor Lockhart went over with you last year as a refresher. Can anybody tell me what spell you would use to shield yourself from an attack?”

Mia raised her hand. She was most likely one of the only students who read their proper 6th year textbook, knowing she needed to know more than what was written in Gadding with Ghouls.

“Yes miss-?”

“Roswell, Mia Roswell” she said.

“Ah, is Susan Roswell your mother?” he asked, now seeing the resemblance from his former school prefect and Order of the Phoenix co-member.

Mia nodded and blushed a little bit, Professor Lupin was maybe only 5 years younger than her mother, so she figured maybe they had been in school together at the same time.

“The Protego charm, which either absorbs the attacking spell or defects it.” Mia said confidently.

“Excellent Miss Roswell, you’ve been paying attention! Now, can anyone besides Miss Roswell tell me the only spell the Protego charm cannot block?” Lupin asked, his first day nerves settling.

The lesson went off without a hitch, and he smirked to himself because he finally knew the mysterious girl's name; Mia Roswell, a 7th Year Ravenclaw.

* * *

The first few lessons in Defense Against the Dark Arts were very interesting. Aside from enjoying staring at the handsome teacher, Professor Lupin was very knowledgeable about what he was teaching thus far; refreshing coming from last year’s git Gilderoy Lockhart, who ended up being a liar, cheat and complete buffoon. Mia couldn’t recall learning a single thing from him last year. Susan was pushing Mia to get as many Outstanding scores on her NEWTS as possible this year, so she made sure she was paying attention in all her classes, minus History of Magic. Professor Binns lessons were less entertaining than watching paint dry, and she’s rather just read the textbook on her own. Mia would spend most of her nights during the first few weeks in the Ravenclaw common room studying, rather than sleeping, due to some nightmares she was experiencing.

Mia regularly had flashbacks to the night The Roswell’s home had been attacked by a death eater. The Death eater tortured John using the cruciatis curse, and if Susan didn’t give up information about the Order, Mia would be next. Susan was barely able to fight this death eater off herself, but knew she needed to protect her family and separating them was the only way to keep them safe. If a death eater came knocking again, they would only find Susan, and her two weaknesses would be miles away, safe and sound. Mia could remember the spells flashing all around her, crying behind the couch as her father screaming as he was being tortured, the death eater trying to get information about the order out of Susan. Mia experienced symptoms of PTSD following the attack, making Susan wish she would’ve modified her memory as well. The magical nuances that happened with wizarding children when they showed signs of their powers would be magnified if Mia was going through a fit on anxiety, which would have John calling Susan in furious confusion.

“Susan, I see a lot of guys with these issues when they come back from deployment. Mia is showing symptoms of PTSD. I don’t understand why our elementary schooler would have PTSD; the lamps keep getting broken, but she swears she didn’t touch them. Miranda has had to replace the living room lamp 4 times this month.” he had said one day when Mia was about 7, and Susan knew it was time for her to come back to live with her.

When she had returned to live with her mother in the UK, she started seeing a trauma counselor through St. Mungo’s Hospital, and was able to head off panic attacks and anxiousness with the help of calming draughts and coping mechanisms. She only had panic attacks now in periods of heavy stress, but the reoccurring nightmares happened every so often with no apparent cure. Sleeping draughts were mostly forbidden by Susan, as they were highly addictive and didn’t fix the actual problem.

* * *

One night at the very beginning of October, Mia woke up in a cold sweat from her recurring nightmare. This night the nightmare had set her on edge more so than the last few times she had dreamt it, so she decided to go for a walk around the corridor to ease her mind. She slipped on her bathrobe and fuzzy slippers, and tip toed out of the girl’s dormitory, out the common room entrance and into the dimly lit hallway. She walked around the corridor looping around Ravenclaw tower, until she ran into none other than Head Boy himself on her 4th lap.

“Mia, what are you doing up this late at night? Let alone wandering the corridors.” Percy asked, looking very smug with his head boy badge pinned to his pajama robes.

“Couldn’t sleep, what are you doing patrolling this late?” she asked, a little irritated that Percy interrupted her walk.

“As Head boy and a prefect, tonight was my night to be on patrol until 4. You should know the prefect schedule since Penny has to do night patrols too”.

Penelope had been a prefect since their 5th year, so Mia was very familiar with the prefect schedule. She was more so just giving Percy a hard time, because it was so much fun to mess with him. He got so riled up when questioning his authority.

“I’m going to have to give you detention, Mia, you know the rules about being outside the common room past curfew hours.” He added.

“Percy, REALLY? I couldn’t sleep and I needed to clear my head by taking a walk. Ask Penny, she knows I don’t sleep well. Cut me some slack.” Mia said furiously. He was really going to give his girlfriend’s best friend detention for a little night stroll?

“Three days detention starting Monday with Professor Lupin, Mia, and any more backtalk will get you longer so I suggest you head straight back to Ravenclaw tower and get to bed. Don’t let me catch you up past curfew again”

Mia was fuming at Percy, she wanted nothing more than to tell him to shove his detention up his pretentious ass, but she knew no matter what she said, and Percy unfortunately had the authority to give her detention. Mia could be a little hot headed, but Percy was stubborn as a bull and she knew arguing with him would get her nowhere. She turned on her heels and stomped back to the common room, muttering some choice phrases about Hogwarts prodigal head boy.

In the morning, Mia woke up feeling more drained than when she went to sleep earlier that morning. It took her a minute to remember that Percy gave her detention for her little night stroll, and as she remembered irritation flushed over her. _Pretentious git_ she thought to herself as she dressed herself to head down to breakfast.

“Hey Mia, are you feeling ok?” Penelope asked as she was putting on her shirt.

“your wanker boyfriend gave me detention because I went for a walk last night” she said irritably “I told him I don’t sleep well and his pompous self still decided to exercise his power to make everyone hate him”

“Oh Mia, he’s just doing his job. Technically you were out past curfew, and it’s his job to discipline as he feels necessary. I can talk to him about your nightmares if you like, maybe he can help? Get you an exception to walk in the middle of the night to clear your head?” Penelope said, cool as a cucumber.

Penelope was the perfect Ravenclaw; always saw things logically and always thought with her head, not her heart. Mia being a much more passionate person usually was guided by her feelings. She usually appreciated Penelope’s impartial, logical self, but today, she was irritated with it.

“No Penny, you’ll just make it worse. Don’t say I said anything to you. He may tack on an extra week just to be spiteful” Mia said in an eye roll “come on; we’ll be late for breakfast”.

Penelope just sighed and followed Mia out of the dormitory, knowing that this was not the morning to try to argue with her friend.

* * *

As Mia walked to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom to begin day one of her detention with Professor Lupin, she dreaded what mundane detention task she would have to endure this week. Last year professor Snape had her wax the potions classroom floor by hand, and scrubbed walls and cauldrons until her hands cracked from over exposure to cleaning chemicals. She prayed that she wouldn’t have to alphabetize anything though, shed scrub cauldrons again before sorting dusty old books.

“Ah, Mia Roswell, caught out of bed after curfew I hear; Ready to begin day one of detention?” Lupin said in a cheery voice.

“Yes sir, what detention task will you have me do today?” Mia said flatly, waiting to hear her mundane chore.

“I don’t believe in making you waste your time with useless tasks” Lupin said as he paced at the front of the classroom “I believe that this time should be for learning. Do you have any homework that needs done for the day still?”

“No sir, I finished all my work before coming here. My mum is very adamant on me getting as many Outstanding’s on my NEWTs this year as possible” Mia said, curious as to what learning she may be doing for detention instead, but rolling her eyes slightly at the thought of how neurotic her mother was with her grades.

“Ah yes, your mother was a Prefect and Head Girl when I started at Hogwarts, she was known for her excellent marks. hmmm, How are you with dueling? We could practice some spells that would correlate with defending yourself in a dueling situation. It would be excellent for your Charms and Defense against the Dark Arts NEWTs”

“uhm, I don’t know, I guess ok, decent enough to get Outstanding O.W.Ls in Charms and Defense against the dark arts. Lockhart’s dueling club last year was a joke, and some of these spells I haven’t used since 5th year.” Mia muttered. “Professor Flitwick doesn’t let us practice dueling outside of the charms classroom either”

“Well let’s start with something basic, how are you with Expelliarmus, disarming your opponent?” Lupin asked. He looked like he got his energy from teaching; his blue eyes were lit up with passion and excitement to teach a student a new skill.

“Expelliarmus!” Mia cried and pointed her wand at Lupin, but nothing happened. “ive done it before, I promise” she said, giving him a sheepish look.

“Ok, yes let’s start there. there’s plenty for you to work on. We’ll go back to the basics.”

Lupin chuckled and opened a cupboard at the front of the classroom. He pulled out a dueling dummy, and positioned its arm up as if it was holding a wand at Mia. He tucked a stick in its hand, and stood across from it.

“Expelliarmus!” he cried, and the stick flew out of the dummy’s hand and into his. He turned and smiled at Mia.

“Your turn” he said through his grin “just focus your energy and picture that stick flying out of his hand and into yours. You want the wand to come to you so your dueling opponent can’t just pick it back up and use it again.”

 

Over the next hour or so, Lupin was so patient on correcting Mia’s form and stance, and assisting her on her spell casting. He was extremely knowledgeable, and continuously corrected her form and stance.

“When you are getting ready to cast the spell, the way you are standing is leaving your left side open to get hit if you are not faster than your opponent. Shift your hips this way…” he said, as he placed his hands on her hips and shifted them into proper form.

Mia could feel herself blush scarlet as he touched her, an almost electric-like pulse ran from his touch throughout her entire body. She felt a connection with him, it made her heart flutter and her palms sweat every time he even came near her. Finally, after about an hour of the stick either not moving or just clammering to the floor, the stick flew out of the dummy’s hand and into Mia’s.

“Oh my god- I did it!! Oh my god oh my god oh my god!”

Without thinking, Mia flew her arms around Lupin’s neck and hugged him tightly. Much to her surprise, he hugged her back.

“Excellent work, Mia, Excellent.”

She pulled back a little bit to look at him, and his expression changed. His smile faded into a curious expression. He stared into her eyes, and as she stared back, she leaned in and placed her lips on his. Her brain had gone on autopilot, not even thinking about the fact that she was kissing her teacher until her lips were already met with his. His lips were warmer and softer than she expected. She opened her mouth slightly and began to swirl the tip of her tongue around his. He began kissing her deeper, wrapping his hands around her waist and pulling her close to him. They both had thoughts that they should pull back, what they were doing wasn’t right, but the connection that drew them together prevented either of them from stopping. She felt a hardness pushing against her leg, so she reached down and grazed his erection with her hand. It was much bigger than she anticipated; He let out a low growl as her hand began to move up and down against the bulge, and he picked her up and set her onto one of the classroom tables next to them. He knew what he was doing was not smart, but just as she felt drawn to him, he found himself in the same predicament. He wanted her, and let himself lose his inhibitions. He slid his hand up her skirt to find her lace panties soaking wet with desire. He grabbed ahold of them and pulled them off in one motion, and before Mia knew it his erection was out of his pants and was ready to enter her.

“Are you a…?” he asked, stopping himself before sliding himself into her.

“No.” Mia said with a grin, knowing he was asking if she was a virgin. She grabbed his penis and pushed it towards her opening. As Lupin slid into her, Mia let out a moan of pleasure, gripping his shoulders tightly. He filled her up quite nicely, and she was already close to climaxing she was so turned on. Mia had to work extremely hard to keep quiet; she muffled her moans by burying her face in Lupin's neck.

She whispered in his ear “I’m going to come, right now!” and pushed her hips further towards him. Her orgasm rippled through her, the sensation more intense than she anticipated. Her entire body went tense as she cried out in ecstasy, forgetting for a moment that there was no silencing charm on the room. Just after her muscles clamped down in Lupin's pulsing member, he grunted and squeezed Mia as close to him as he could, breathing heavily from his own intense orgasm. They both held their positions for a minute, enjoying the release they both had before having to face the realization that a student and teacher just engaged in sexual relations.

“well, uhm, I don’t really know what to say…” he said sheepishly, running his hand through his hair “What just happened is entirely inappropriate, I shouldn’t’ve allowed myself to get carried away like that”

“I think we both enjoyed that” Mia said confidently “as far as I’m concerned, that is our secret and no one will know.” She leaned in and kissed him “that was amazing, by the way” she grinned at him slyly.

She couldn’t believe the amount of pleasure she got from him. She had had sex with an old boyfriend last year, but she was never able to orgasm during sex with him. It took twenty minutes of him poking around until he found something that felt good for her, and half the time she faked it because she was bored and would just masturbate later.

“Mia, this was… well…” Lupin smiled, blushing “but this can’t happen again. We can be finished for the night; you should head back to your common room before curfew hits. I’ll see you tomorrow evening”

Mia smiled and winked at Lupin and said “I’ll see you tomorrow”.


	2. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's day 2 of detention. They both know what happened the first night can't happen again... or can it?

Mia had a hard time falling asleep that night, but once she was actually asleep, she slept incredibly well. She stared at the blue curtained ceiling of her 4 poster bed, the events of her detention swarming through her mind. She couldn’t believe she had sex with a teacher, but she wasn’t regretting it. She thought of kissing him over and over until her eyelids became heavy, and drifted off into a dreamless slumber. She woke up and saw Penelope was sitting on her bed near her, fumbling with her earrings.

“good morning sleepy head! How’d you sleep?” she asked

“fine actually,” Mia said truthfully “no nightmare last night”

“oh good! You were snoring most of the night so I figured you must be resting well. Come on, were going to be late for breakfast”.

 

Once arriving in the great hall, the smell of a breakfast medley overwhelmed Mia’s nostrils. She couldn’t wait chow down on a big helping of pancakes. Her mind was once again replaying the events of the night before, praying that today wouldn’t be awkward between them. Just as she was settling into her seat at the Ravenclaw table, she caught the eye of Professor Lupin, staring at her as she walked in. This time, it was him who broke the stare when he caught her looking back at him. _Yep, this is going to be awkward_ she said to herself. She didn’t have defense against the dark arts with him today, but he was still stuck with her for day 2 of detention this evening.

* * *

Lupin paced in his office awaiting his detention hours. He on one hand was dreading having to be in the same room as Mia alone for 2 hours, but on the other hand was excited to spend more time with her. He had such an inner conflict with himself about what had happened, but the connection he felt when he kissed her was like nothing he’d experienced before. _What happened was wrong, Remus. You cannot let this happen again. She is a student and you are her teacher. This is wildly inappropriate and if someone catches wind on what happened-_ his thoughts were interrupted by the door opening to his classroom.

“Ah, Mia, welcome back to your day 2 of detention. How are you with Stupefy?” he asked, wasting no time to begin and get down to business.

“I’m not sure, it’s been a couple years since Flitwick’s lesson on it-“

“No matter, let’s try it on the dummy” Lupin said quickly.

Mia noticed that he was quite in a hurry to get her started on her ‘lesson’, and didn’t make as much eye contact as normal. Usually Lupin had a very warm and welcoming gaze, but today she could tell he was purposefully trying to avoid her eyes. She figured once again this was his embarrassment from yesterday, but she had been hoping all day that what happened during her first day of detention would happen again. It was all she could think about during her potions lesson, and Professor Snape was less than impressed with her brew of Draught of the Living Death.

Mia turned towards the dummy and attempted to stun it, which failed miserably. Lupin seemed to shift into normal teaching mode and was warm and friendly again when correcting her stance and technique. It kept his mind occupied on the task at hand for the most part, but when he would touch her to adjust her stance thoughts of the night before would flood into Mia’s brain.

“you do the same thing you were with Expelliarmus; when you square your hips that way, it takes you a little longer to cast the spell, leaving your left side to get hit in a duel. Its not major, but a skilled dueler will see this and use it to hit you before you can counter.” He said, he patiently correcting her every time she kept reverting back to her old stance.

After a half hour or so, Mia threw out a stun that rebounded from the dummy and hit her square in the abdomen, doing exactly what the spell was supposed to do; Stun her. She flew back and hit the cold stone floor with a thud, and couldn’t move or speak.

“Oh Mia that was a fabulous stun; so strong you stunned yourself” he chuckled “we’ll work on controlling that energy so that doesn’t happen again. I’ll make a pot of tea and well take a break” Lupin said as he picked her up off the floor to carry her into his office.

_Fuck he’s strong_ Mia thought, as he effortlessly carried her to his office and laid her down on his plush green couch.

“The stun will wear off in just a minute, no need to worry” he said, a warm kindness in his eyes gazing into her frozen expression.

He walked up a half flight of stairs and disappeared, but Mia heard the clanking of tea cups and a kettle being put on to warm. She stared at a tank in the corner of the office that contained a Grindylow, which was moving about angrily. After a minute, Mia found herself being able to move again, but her whole body had a pins and needles sensation for the first minute the stun was wearing off. Lupin reentered his office with to steaming cups of tea.

“Ah see, that’s getting better isn’t it?” he asked as he handed her the bigger cup. “Drink a little bit, it’ll make you feel better”.

“Thank you” she said weakly, feeling a little shaky still.

She took a big sip of her tea and felt the warmth spread over her whole body. She felt loads better almost instantly.

“Wow, what is in this tea?” she asked, amazed at how quickly she recovered from her spell.

“Oh, it’s just regular earl grey” Lupin chuckled “There are many regular remedies to feeling ill or weak that don’t require magic. Just as after an encounter with a dementor, a bit of chocolate does wonders for the nerves.”

“Professor, I heard that one of the dementors attacked Harry Potter on the train. If they were there to search for Black, why would they go after a student?” Mia asked.

That was the question the entire student body was wondering, but too afraid to ask any professor why they had taken an interest to Harry.

“Harry has horrors in his past that many of us haven’t experienced. The dementors are drawn to this level of sorrow and make them think he’s on a similar level to their prisoners. They are very interesting creatures and not ones you can reason with, so sometimes what they do can be a mystery to us with logic” Lupin said.

Mia could tell he was trying to figure out exactly what happened on the train that night as well so she decided not to push her luck with any more questions about it tonight. _That poor boy never seems to catch a break,_ Mia thought.

“So, what is on our agenda for the rest of my detention? Do I get to stun you next?” Mia asked jokingly, however she was hoping for something a little different from her spell lessons.

“No, no stunning me” Lupin laughed “we’ll have plenty of time to practice some spell casting after you’ve rested up. Perhaps some bookwork lessons, maybe in something that you’ve been struggling with in your classes?”

“well…. I was maybe hoping for something different” Mia said as she fiddled the hem of her skirt.

She decided she was going to go for it. She stood from the couch and slipped her sweater off, and began unbuttoning her white school uniform blouse to reveal a lacy pink bra underneath. Lupin inhaled sharply at the sight of her shapely breasts.

“Mia, we really shouldn’t…” he began to say.

“I am of age, if you’re worried about that”. Mia said grinning.

“not only am I too old for you, I’m your teacher...” he protested, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off of her.

“see, Professor, I disagree.” She said as she walked over to him on the couch and straddled his lap and kissed him firmly.

His hands betrayed his mind and found their way to her waist as she kissed him, but he pulled away when he felt his bulge growing beneath her.

“This is my fault, Mia, I shouldn’t have let myself get carried away yesterday. It’s reckless, and completely inappropriate…” he said but was silenced by her index finger pressing on his lips to shush him.

“I haven’t ever felt pleasure like I did yesterday. It’s all I’ve been able to think about for the last 24 hrs. _You_ have been all I’ve been able to think about” she said, and kissed him again, rocking her hips against him to feel the bulge in his pants tighten even more.

She began to unbutton his shirt when his hands flew up and grasped her wrists a little too firmly. She winced at his grip, so he let up slightly, but still holding her wrists in front of her. He stared at her breasts and breathed heavily for just a few moments. He knew he should push her off and send her on her way, but he lost his battle with his conscious and gave in to his desire.

“Mia, if we do this, don’t call me professor, it's Remus. Shirt also stays on.”

Mia nodded and he let go of his hold on her wrists, and flipped her around so she was on her back against the green plush couch.

He knew against his better judgement that this shouldn’t happen again, but like her, she’s been all he’d been able to think about the last day as well. Remus slipped her underwear off and slipped one finger inside of her, slowly and gently. Mia arched her back slightly, beginning to take pleasure in his touch.

“This ok?” he whispered in her ear as he changed from one finger to two.

Mia nodded and kissed him firmly. His tongue probed her mouth and encircled her tongue as if they were tangoing. His thumb began to circle her clit, and she threw her head back and moaned from the sensation. His fingers were hitting the exact right spot to make Mia’s body shiver.

“That’s it, give in to me, come for me” he whispered softly in her ear and began kissing her neck as she moaned again from pleasure.

He began moving faster and pushing deeper into her; it was not long until her back arched sharply and her muscles clamped down on Remus's fingers, her orgasm rippling through her stronger than her one yesterday in the class room. She cried out in pleasure as she released, and she then was suddenly very aware of how warm it was in the office.

Remus placed little kisses along her neck and collar bone as she was recovering from her release. “good girl, that’s it” he whispered to her nuzzling his head against her neck.

“That was amazing” she breathed, She was surprised how wonderful this feeling was, and never wanted it to end. “What about you?” she asked, realizing he didn’t get his release in all of her pleasure.

“oh I’m not finished with you yet, Mia. I’ll have my turn here soon” He said with a devilish grin.

He picked her up off the couch and carried her up a half flight of stairs to his sleeping quarters. He laid her down on his plush white sheets, unhooking her bra to free her perky and full breasts, all for his viewing pleasure.

“my god, you’re beautiful” he said, taking in the lovely view before him.

Mia blushed, she had never been called beautiful by anyone other than her mother, and when Susan said it Mia always rolled her eyes at her. He began sucking on her left breast while kneading the right. Mia arched her back once again at the sensation. He came up to kiss her fervently, his kiss deepening and more firm as the seconds went by. She entangled her hands in his hair and pulled her lips away to whisper in his ear

“Remus, I want you inside me”

The use of his first name felt foreign coming from her lips, but she figured it made him feel more like two regular lovers rather than a teacher and pupil. He pulled his hard cock from his pants and placed it at her opening, pushing in firmly. She inhaled sharply as he stretched her; he was well endowed, as he should be for a man of his tall stature.

“you ok?” he asked quickly, worried he might have hurt her.

She smiled at him and kissed him, which he took as a yes. He started out slowly, building speed as he could see she was enjoying it. _Fuck, she’s so tight,/i > he thought to himself, knowing that he wouldn’t last long. His orgasm was approaching and he fought to keep it at bay until Mia came again. He felt her tighten around him, just in time as he came with her, her moans of pleasure pushing him over the edge. Both Remus and Mia laid together for a couple minutes, cuddling in silence, knowing that their time together that evening was almost over._

__

_“you should probably get dressed to head back to Ravenclaw tower” he said finally “I don’t want you getting caught out after curfew”._

“Can’t I just stay with you tonight?” Mia asked playfully and she brushed a bit of his hair from his face.

“Now we both know you can’t do that” he smiled, cupping her face with his hand.

They were a little rough against her perfectly smooth cheek, callouses of someone who has done physical labor at some point in his life.

“Do you know just how beautiful you are?” he asked, gazing into her eyes.

Mia blushed all the way to her ears; she loved the way that word sounded coming out of his mouth, especially describing her.

“Plus that arse is the best in your class!” he chuckled and he grabbed her left butt cheek playfully.

Mia giggled and rolled her eyes, and then play slapped him on the shoulder for his crude comment.

“I need to get dressed” she said as she began collecting her clothing items and dressing herself as she walked through Remus's living quarters.

As he stood up and began fixing his pants, she popped her head through the doorway.

“Please tell me we can do this again?” she asked quietly through the doorway.

“You know we shouldn’t” he said smirking at her, and gave her a small wink.

She gave him a devilish grin. “See you tomorrow!” she zipped off out of his office and through the classroom.

He walked over to the mirror hanging next to the bed, looking himself in the eye. _Oh Remus, what on earth have you gotten yourself into._

* * *

After breakfast that morning, Mia and Penelope were changing into school robes preparing to get to their Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson. Mia was standing in front of the mirror, adjusting her collar of her blouse to show off her cleavage given to her by her best push up bra that she brought with her to Hogwarts.

“Uh Mia” said Penelope puzzled “are you going to button up your blouse more? That’s a bit more cleavage than the school uniform intends for”

“Oh Penny, relax” Mia chuckled

“Who are you trying to impress? Is there someone I should know about?” Penelope pressed, giving her the third degree as Mia adjusted her skirt a little shorter than normal length by folding the waist over a couple times.

“No way, you kept Percy a secret from me for 6 months. I’m just simply sending a subliminal message. That’s all” she stated flatly “Come on, let’s go, if you’re lucky you’ll be able to snog the head boy before class” she winked at Penelope and walked out of the girls dormitory, eager to get to her class.

When Mia and Penelope walked into the classroom, Remus immediately noticed the shorter skirt and plunging neckline that Mia had decided to don for class. _Bloody hell, she did this to torture me_ he thought as he watched her sit down and look up at him with a slight grin. His gaze burned into her, he wanted nothing more than to take her right then and there on her desk, and he thought she knew it too. Some of the other boys in the class noticed Mia’s neckline also, as a few of them were coming up to her and saying things like ‘nice rack, Mia’ or ‘Hey Mia, care to share the rest of those girls with me after class?’ Mia just rolled her eyes at these comments, but they got under Remus’s skin more than he showed.

“Gentleman, that’s enough. Everyone open your books to page 43”

* * *

At lunch, Mia was reading her Herbology text book to prepare for her lesson with professor sprout today when a loud smoking object whizzed just past her head, enough to make her hair breeze. The Weasley twins, Fred and George, were running after the object, laughing while Percy chased after them, threatening detention and a letter home. Mia chuckled, she was sure that Percy got absolutely tortured at home with brothers like that. She felt an ounce of pity for him, the amount of dung bombs and whizzing objects that they must use on him daily I’m sure got quite annoying. As she was finishing up her chicken noodle soup, Andrew Flint, a 7th year Slytherin, came up to Mia and plopped down next to her. Andrew was a tall boy, towering over Mia even sitting down. 7th year Ravenclaws and Slytherins had Herbology together, so he pulled out his textbook.

“Hey Mia, so you’re the best student in Herbology…” he began.

Mia smiled, “yes Flint, what can I do for you?” she chuckled from the bit of flattery.

“Well, my mum is pushing me to get good NEWT scores this year, since she knows my brother is more the athletic type and is thicker than a troll, but I’m not doing that well in Herbology. Any change you will help me study, tutor me a little bit? I brought you a muffin!”

Mia laughed, Andrew always talked about how his brother, Marcus, was thicker than a troll, but he wasn’t exactly Einstein himself either. However, he brought her a blueberry muffin which was her favorite, so she decided to be nice and help him.

“Fine Flint, I’ll help you. I’ve got detention with Lupin tonight but Monday evening after dinner I can study with you”

“ah thanks Mia, it’s a date!” he flashed her a grin and winked at her, his dark brown eyes twinkling, then scuffled out of the great hall.

Mia rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to her textbook. She noticed that at the Gryffindor table the Weasley twins were putting something in Percy’s food while his attention was completely on talking to a first year about study habits. Mia couldn’t wait to see what Fred and George were up to this time.

* * *

Arriving for her final day of detention with Remus, Mia was still donning her unbuttoned blouse and hiked up skirt, just to get a rise out of him. She took great pleasure in knowing that she tortured him just a little bit in class today, sending her subliminal message right to him. When she walked through the door, he was leaning against a desk in the middle of the classroom, waiting for her with the biggest smirk on his face. _If she’s going to tease me in class, I can fight fire with fire_ Remus thought to himself.

“Welcome back to detention, Miss Roswell.”


	3. chapter 3

“I see you’ve taken a liberal approach to your school robes today” Remus said, eyeing her perfect cleavage poking through the collar of her blouse.

Mia grinned, choosing to treat his question as rhetorical.

“What lesson do you have for me today, Professor Lupin?” she said playfully, sitting atop one of the classroom tables and parting her legs slightly.

“Oh, well the floors need a good waxing actually” he said with a chuckle and pulled out a bucket and bottle of floor wax from a cabinet in the front of the classroom, expecting her to do this task without magic.

“wait- I thought you preferred to make detentions into lessons?” she asked, a touch of dissatisfaction creeping into her voice. He couldn’t possibly be serious about her waxing the floors.

“Oh I do, that’s what this is” he walked over to her and leaned in close. “If you tease me in my classroom, your actions have consequences” Remus whispered in her ear.

He fingered the collar of her mostly open shirt, giving her a devilish grin. “The quicker these floors get done, the more time well have for what I have planned” he winked at her and began walking up the stairs “I’ll be in my office” he said cheerily.

Mia rolled her eyes and grabbed the bucket.

As Mia was scrubbing the floor, she heard footsteps coming down the corridor. She looked up to see Harry Potter walking into the classroom.

“Oh, hey Mia” Harry said, looking at her scrubbing intently “is Professor Lupin here?”

“yes, he’s in his office” she said, wiping the sweat from her forehead.

Harry shot her a sympathetic look as he walked up the stairs and into Remus’s office, and Mia heard “ah Harry, what a wonderful surprise! come in, come in” just before the door closed.

Once Mia was finished scrubbing the floor, the office door was still shut with Remus and Harry inside. Mia walked up the stairs and knocked lightly. Harry opened the door and Mia poked her head in to see Remus sitting at his desk, and they had two cups of tea sitting out that they were sipping on.

“I’m finished with the floors” she said, hoping to hear that Harry was just leaving.

“Ok Mia, thank you. We’ll cut your detention short today so you are free to go”

Mia tried to hide the disappointment on her face that he was sending her away early. She nodded and turned to walk out. Remus didn’t want to have to cut her detention short, boy did he have something in mind for her, but he couldn’t shoo Harry away. Harry was the son of his best friend, and much to this point, Remus hadn’t been able to be a part of Harry’s life due to him being raised by his muggle aunt and uncle, far away from the wizarding world. He was happy to get to know Harry, and become his mentor and friend, as well as his professor. He wasn’t supposed to be doing what he was with Mia anyway, so maybe it was for the best that he sent her off tonight.

* * *

Back in the Ravenclaw girl’s dormitory, Mia huffed as she took off her sweater and began changing into her pajamas. She was irritated that she didn’t get to have one more night with Remus alone.

_Stupid potter she thought everybody just loooooves harry potter, they’ll stop their whole day for him; Might as well roll out a red carpet every time he walks into the great hall._

She didn’t really dislike Harry, she didn’t know him all too well with him being 4 classes under her, but he was always a nice kid. His name was infamous in the wizarding world as The Boy Who Lived, which was a pretty remarkable thing. Everyone at Hogwarts knew his name, which she heard through the grape vine that he didn’t even know who he was until Hagrid came to deliver the news to him about starting at Hogwarts. She heard his aunt and uncle were a real piece of work too.

She sat on her bed in a huff, and began braiding her hair back. She looked at herself in the mirror that rested on the wall across from her.  
_He’s a teacher, Mia. Don’t be more of an idiot than you have been._ She knew she was playing with fire, but she was so drawn to him. Mia looked at her watch. 8:30. Too early for bed, but she was too irritated at the moment to go down and socialize with her fellow housemates. She lay down and pulled the drapes around her bed shut, placing her pillow over her eyes to block out the oil lamps still lit in the dormitory. She hoped she’d be able to get a decent amount of sleep tonight.

* * *

Mia met up with Andrew in the library just after dinner on Monday. Currently in Herbology they were studying how to grow and tend to devils snare. Herbology wasn’t Mia’s strongest subject, but she did well because she knew if she didn’t study and put her best effort in her mother would have her head. Susan Roswell was a force to be reckoned with. A previous Ravenclaw and head girl herself, she was always top of her class and sharp as a tack when it came to her spell casting. She had joined the Order of the Phoenix shortly after Mia was born, and was a strong contributing member. Part of her regretted joining after an attack on her family that led her to modify her then muggle husband, john’s memory to forgetting that his wife was a witch and the wizarding world itself. The other half of her knew that she was an essential part of the order, and the fight to stop Voldemort needed to be a collective effort. She was hard on Mia because she wanted Mia to be better than she was, stronger, a more skilled witch, powerful enough that if Voldemort ever returned Mia would be able to defend herself and her family. Susan just barely fought off the death eater there to attack their family, as skilled as she was. It was her greatest fear that she wouldn’t push her hard enough, and she would pay the ultimate price for her lack of knowledge or skill.

As Mia approached the table that Andrew was sitting at, he greeted her with a toothy smile. Andrew was handsome, a tall slender build with dark hair and light eyes. Much more attractive than his younger brother Marcus, who somewhat resembled a troll.

“Hey Mia, thanks again for helping me with this assignment.” He said, pulling her chair out for her.

“sure thing Andrew, now. Devils snare is an extremely tricky plant to tend for…”

they studied together for over an hour, Mia going over every detail of devils snare that she possibly knew and could find in the textbooks and attempted to drill it into Andrews head. If anything, at least her knowledge of the plant would be ingrained into her memory forever, if she ever wanted to get into Herbology after Hogwarts. She laughed at the thought. _Nah, not for me._ Once their brains were tired from all the cramming, Andrew leaned back in his chair and stretched his arms “ahhh I’m so tired of studying, can we do something more fun?”

Mia chucked “and what is so fun that you want to do on a Monday night?”

“let’s sneak out of the castle and head over to Hogsmeade for a drink” Andrew grinned at her. Mia was pretty sure he was serious, but she wasn’t quite in the rule breaking mood that night.

“yeah and get caught by professor Snape or filch and spend the rest of the year scrubbing cauldrons? I think not” she laughed. “Doesn’t one of your Slytherins have a stash of brandy hidden in the common room?” she asked.

She heard that Slytherins were notorious for having contraband stashed about, most of which professor Snape turned a blind eye because everyone knew he favored his house.

Andrew smirked “maybe, too bad you can’t come back and enjoy a glass with me” he winked at her and grinned.

“Yeah ok Flint” Mia rolled her eyes and laughed “I’m headed back to Ravenclaw tower. Send me an owl if you have any Herbology questions this week.” Mia picked up her books and began walking towards the library door.

“hey Mia, wait” Andrew called after her. She turned around to look at him “are you going to the Gryffindor Hufflepuff quidditch match in a couple weeks?”

“of course, everyone is going” she said.

“Sit with me. At the match.” He said, trying to seem as smooth as possible.

“Sure Flint, I’ll sit with you” she said as she turned to walk out the door.

It took her until she was around the corner to pick up on the fact that Andrew might have just asked her out. She shrugged it off; she didn’t consider it a date so why should he?

* * *

The next couple weeks went on as a typical school year, Mia didn’t get any alone time with Remus, but a few glances here and there in the great hall or classroom made her certain she was still on his mind. She was focused on her classes and helping out Andrew, and was secretly plotting to see if she’d be able to get detention again when it was Remus’ week to have it.

On Halloween, the school was in an uproar. The Fat Lady, the portrait that hung at the entrance to the Gryffindor common, had been attacked and went missing. Percy was jumping into action as Head Boy

“ok everybody, remain calm! Professor Dumbledore is on his way!”

Penelope and Mia hung back with another group of students, while most of the Gryffindor’s were huddled up to their portrait whispering and chattering. What would’ve done such a thing? Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall came swiftly though the crowd, up to the portrait. They inspected the gashes in the painting with horror. They asked the other paintings to locate the Fat Lady, but then Seamus Finnegan spoke up.

“she’s right there sir, hiding just on that wall!”.

Indeed the Fat Lady was cowering behind a bush in another painting.

“milady, who did this to you?” Dumbledore asked kindly, but with concern in his voice.

“it was him!” she cried “eyes black like coal, no emotion, just pure terror!” the fat lady wailed with tears

“who, milady, who?” asked McGonagall, her eyes widening.

“Sirius Black!”.

An uproar occurred through the crowd, Mia and Penelope exchanged terrified glances. _Sirius black, HERE? Inside Hogwarts?_ Mia looked over and saw Remus standing near her, waiting for direction on what the staff was supposed to do about the security breach. He looked at her and gave her a reassuring nod. She certainly wished it had made her feel better.

* * *

The next few days were thankfully uneventful. Sirius Black was nowhere to be found in the castle and on the grounds, so the Gryffindor’s were able to return to their common room following a night of sleeping on sleeping bags in the Great Hall. The castle was finally starting to settle its nerves after the attack, and classes began to feel normal again. Mia awoke rather early one morning following the attack. She lay in bed for almost an hour, staring at the bottom of the top bunk thinking of class schedule for the day. She had Muggle Studies first thing, her mother insisting she take it so she could keep up the appearance to her father that she was a regular teenage muggle, and then Defense Against the Dark Arts after lunch followed by Charms. Looking at her watch, she got up and shuffled off to the bathroom. If she spent more time in the great hall for breakfast, she might get to accidentally bump into Remus before class today. The weather was starting to turn chilly as it was now November, and she hadn’t gotten to have many encounters with Remus since her detention about a month ago. Sure, he was her teacher in class and they exchanged glances on occasion, but Mia was missing the ‘more’ part that felt like it was eons ago.

Mia hung around the great hall for almost an hour, with no sign of Remus. She had chatted with more groups of students than normal just to give herself an excuse to be in the great hall for longer. She chalked it up to him having a quick cup of coffee in his office, and hustled off to Muggle Studies class. Professor Burbage would be talking about muggle fashion today, and Mia couldn’t help but giggle at the thought of her explaining shoulder pads to the class.

After an amusing fashion presentation in Muggle Studies, Mia rushed off to the bathroom to ‘freshen up’ before she would see Remus in class. She fluffed her hair and removed her blue and bronze striped tie, stuffing it into the pocket of her cardigan and unbuttoning her top to show a little bit of cleavage. She decided to leave her skirt its regular length, because she was pretty sure she accidently flashed a couple of Hufflepuff 4th years her panties last time she hiked it up when she dropped one of her school books in the hallway and had to bend down to pick it up.

When Mia arrived at the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, she was shocked to find professor Snape standing at the front of the room rather than Remus. She slid into her seat next to Penelope.

Mia whispered “why is Snape here??”

Penelope just shrugged, looking just as confused.

“good afternoon class, today we are talking about werewolves” Snape began.

“excuse me, sir,” one of the Gryffindor boys that sat in the back of the classroom asked as he raised his hand. “where is professor Lupin?”

“Professor Lupin has fallen ill will be out the next few days so I will be teaching this lesson. Now, who can tell me where the term werewolf came from?”

Mia began to tune Snape out and she began to question herself on where Remus may have gone. He didn’t mention to her that he was going to be out part of the week, not that he was required to inform her of his schedule; she just figured it would have come up in class or something. Mia also found it strange that Snape was teaching a lesson about werewolves in a 7th year class, when werewolves were usually covered in the end of third year.

“Miss Roswell I suggest you PAY ATTENTION” Snape hissed as he smacked the top of her textbook.

Mia felt like she jumped 3 feet in the air. She looked around and realized everyone’s books were open, and she was about to feel Snape’s wrath if she didn’t get it together for this lesson.

“We’re on page 394, Miss Roswell. Don’t be fooled by my temporary post, I expect a 500 word essay on werewolves on my desk by Monday morning, from all of you”

the entire class dared not groan at Snape’s lofty homework assignment. Everyone by now knew not to challenge Snape, it never ended well for those that did.

* * *

There was no sign of Remus for the rest of the weekend, and Mia was beginning to worry. Snape said that he had fallen ill, but he seemed completely fine the last time she saw him. Monday morning came around and he wasn’t seen at breakfast, so Mia kept her shirt collar buttoned as usual in case Snape would be teaching them again. She had her 500 word essay on werewolves with her, knowing if professor Snape ever gave you an assignment it was in your best interest to turn it in on time.

Her heart fluttered when she walked into the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom and saw Remus standing at the front of the class, a handsome smile on his face and his robes a bit more tattered than usual. As Mia slid into her seat, he caught her gaze for just a moment. Professor Snape strode into the class holding his hand out for everyone’s werewolf essay. Silently, everyone handed him their parchments and held their breath until he walked out the classroom door.

“Thank merlin we don’t have to have class with him again” whispered Penelope.

“Hello everyone, I apologize for my sudden absence this week, but I hope you all enjoyed class with Professor Snape” Remus said as he smiled a little bit from mentioning Snape.

The class giggled a little bit, knowing that his’s statement about the potions master was sarcastic. He began teaching the class about some dark magic used in the late 14th century, and how it evolved into the curses we have today. Mia hung onto every word he said, partly because his lesson was very interesting, but also because she couldn’t take her eyes off him. The way he carried himself in front of a classroom so confidently was unbelievably sexy, and he had a grin that made Mia’s stomach do flip flops.

At the end of his lesson, she told Penelope that she needed to ask some questions about the lecture and that she’d catch up with her in a few.

“uh, Professor Lupin, could I ask you a few questions about today’s lesson?” Mia asked trying to seem casual as the class was exiting the room.

“Sure Mia, what can I help you with?” Lupin said, smiling at her. She paused as she waited for the last few boys to exit the room.

“I don’t have any questions about the lesson today, actually” she said quickly, looking down at the floor.

“I figured so; I’m guessing you wanted to ask me about my absence last week?”

“Yes, where were you? Are you ok? I didn’t know you were going to be out for the entire weekend” Mia couldn’t help but fire a million questions him. “I was worried” she finished quietly.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you. I was feeling a bit under the weather but I’m all right now.” Remus said, looking at her with an understanding smile. “Do you want to come by my office this evening during my office hours? In case you remember that question you were going to ask me”

he grinned at her, she knew what he was insinuating.  
“I am actually tutoring Andrew Flint tonight in Herbology, but if I have questions with my assignments maybe I’ll come by tomorrow.”

“Ah, Andrew Flint, Slytherin right? I didn’t realize you were close”

Mia saw his expression change when mentioning Andrew’s name. Did she maybe just make him a little jealous?

“It’s not like that, Remus. I’m just tutoring him because his mom is pushing him to get good NEWT scores, and I know what that’s like.” Mia explained. Remus smiled at the use of his first name.

“You better head off to charms class, Professor Flitwick doesn’t like tardiness”

“No he doesn’t” Mia laughed “wait- you know my charms class is next?” she asked, surprised that he seemed to know her schedule.

“I like to think I am invested in my students.” Remus smirked. “Feel free to stop by my office if you finish your tutoring early”

* * *

Remus kept checking his watch during his office hours, waiting for Mia to stop by, but she never did. He knew she was busy this evening, but he had hoped that maybe she would’ve made time to stop by. _Remus, you can’t get this caught up in every little thing she does. You already told yourself that you couldn’t get involved with her because she was a student, and look what happened. Plus, if Susan knew what you were doing with her daughter, she’d hex you so fast you’d never know what hit you._ Remus knew Susan from their days in the Order together, but also from their time at Hogwarts. She was Susan Byrne back then, 5 classes ahead of him, and gave him detention once or twice during her tenure as Head Girl. She was a talented witch that took no crap from anyone. Remus chuckled at a memory of Susan busting Sirius and him once sneaking around Hogwarts, as James remained under the safety of his invisibility cloak. His mood fell when thinking of his former best friend Sirius Black. Part of him couldn’t believe that Sirius would sell out James and Lily, he was always so loyal to the Order and was the fiercest of friends, but the other part of him knew the testimonies from witnesses that night that he killed Peter Pettigrew and the street full of muggles. His heart ached at the memories that tore his world apart 12 years ago. He poured himself a glass of scotch that he kept stashed in his office, and hung his head low, trying to push the painful memories out of his head.


	4. chapter 4

Mia awoke in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. She once again had her recurring nightmare of the night her family was attacked when she was just 4 years old, but tonight it was much more vivid than most nights. She was on the verge of a panic attack, hands shaking and clammy as she tried to calm herself. It had been years since she’d experienced a panic attack, and she didn’t want today to break that streak. She hopped out of bed and slipped down the stairs to the Ravenclaw common room. Her pajamas were not exactly roaming the halls appropriate, a pair of satin sleep shorts and a skinny strap tank top without a bra was not exactly what she would want to get caught by Filch or a Prefect, but her mind was so on edge she didn’t care. She slipped out of the common room and headed down the stairs towards the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom. She needed to see Remus.

The classroom was empty of course at this time of night, the curving staircase in the back of the classroom echoed slightly as she stepped up the stairs that led to his office. There was a shorter flight of stairs that led to the sleeping quarters up another 8 stairs or so from the office.

“Remus” she whispered as she entered his sleeping quarters.

He was sound asleep with an empty glass of scotch on his bedside table next to his wand.

“Remus!” she whispered louder, but he remained unchanged.

“REMUS” she said aloud and put her hand on his shoulder.

He jumped up and grabbed his wand instantly with one hand, the other pulling the sheets up to his neck. She had startled him pretty good; as it took him a second to register that it was her who woke him.

“Mia?? What on earth are you doing here?”

“I couldn’t sleep, I- had this dream, nightmare really” she stuttered, he could tell she was incredibly flustered by what she had experienced.

“accio” he said pointing to his shirt that lay across his dresser on the other side of the bedroom.

He slipped it on swiftly and stood up to get a glass of water, the 5 glasses of scotch from a couple hours ago making his mouth feel dry. He looked at her for a second, seeing the distraught facial expression she was wearing.

“would you like to talk about it?” he asked, sitting down on the edge of his bed and motioning her to join him.

“it sounds so stupid when I say it aloud” she said bowing her head.

“Well its obviously not stupid if it startled you enough to come all the way here at 3am” he said, grabbing her hand to reassure her.

She told him all about the night where she was attacked. She didn’t know the death eaters name who came to their house that night, her mother wouldn’t speak of many details of that night or why exactly they had been targeted. Mia always assumed it was because Susan had married a muggle. She recalled the events of how her father had been tortured with the cruciatis curse, and how her mother was barely able to defend them. Mia, being so little, hid behind the couch and covered her ears, but could still hear her father’s screams and the flashes of light around them. The fear she felt that night was the same feeling that she awakes with every time she has this nightmare.

“tonight was particularly bad” she explained, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt to keep her hands from shaking. “I could almost feel the curse that my father was experiencing, if that’s even possible.” she said as her voice broke.

Remus listened to her story and recalled his own memory of that night. It was a full moon the night it happened and he was staying with Sirius. They were visited by Mad Eye Moody a few days later to tell them that Susan and her family had been attacked. Susan was never quite the same after that night, she was still the intense, ball busting witch that they knew, but after she charmed her husband’s memory and sent him packing for America, a light within her went out, and she seemed almost hollow at times. Remus put his arm around Mia; she began to cry into his shoulder. He stroked her back and let her cry. He knew there was nothing he could say that could change the way she felt about that night, but he could at least be here for her.

Mia cried for a good twenty minutes. Remus remained quiet the entire time, and even after she stopped crying they sat there for another ten minutes or so, his arm around her. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable; they would’ve been content sitting there for the whole night quiet.

“I’m sorry” Mia said finally, breaking the silence in the room. “I didn’t mean to wake you for this”.

“Don’t apologize Mia, its ok. I do worry about you sneaking out of the common room this late at night though” he chuckled “asking for more detention”.

He cupped his hand around her cheek and pulled her face to his, and kissed her gently. The kiss started out soft, but grew in intensity. Mia shifted over and straddled him sitting on the edge of the bed. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and his hands tangled in her long dark hair, kissing her fervently. While her eyes were closed, the images of her dream began to replay in her mind. She pulled out of the kiss suddenly.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I can do this tonight. Every time I close my eyes the dream plays through my head” she said, a couple stray tears slipping down her cheek.

It had been weeks since she had the change to have sex with him, but her emotions were running wild and she couldn’t push the dream out of her head.

“Here, I think I have something that will help.” he said, wiping her tears with his thumbs. She shifted off his lap and he walked over to a cabinet in the corner of the bedroom, and pulled a small vial off one of the shelves labeled ‘sleeping draught’.

“Take this if you are having trouble sleeping, no dreams guaranteed” he said handing it to her.

“My mom said not to rely on sleeping draughts too much, they can be addictive” she said, unsure if she should take it.

“They can be, but just one won’t hurt. Save it for an emergency when you need to ensure a good night’s sleep”

“Thank you, Remus, I should be getting back.”

“Yes, I suppose so. Do you want me to escort you back? That way in case you are seen I can say I found you out of bed first and am escorting you back? Ill wave your detention” he chuckled at that last part.

“Can you give me detention with you?” Mia said, smirking at him.

“It’s Professor Trelawney’s week for detention, trust me, you don’t want it with her.” they both laughed as he got dressed to walk her back to Ravenclaw tower.

Before they walked out of his office, she gave him one last kiss before they had to act as just teacher catching pupil out of bed.

It was 6 am when Mia finally snuck back into the Ravenclaw common room. She tiptoed up the stairs into the 7th year girl’s floor, and slipped into bed.

“Couldn’t sleep again?” Penelope asked her through the dark.

 _Busted._ Penelope lit a candle on her bedside table. Her ashy brown curls hung limp around her face, as if she had slept most of the night and woke to find Mia gone again.

“Yeah I just went for a walk” Mia said coolly

“You’ve been gone awhile” Penelope said, even cooler than Mia, almost icy, crossing her arms over her powder blue tank top. “There’s something you’re not telling me”

“Penny, the nightmares have been really bad, that’s all, no big deal. If there is something major, I’ll tell you”

Penelope huffed and rolled over. “That is kind of major, you know.”

Mia knew she had been pushing Penelope away ever since she started dating Percy, but he was rubbing off on her in certain ways and it really got under Mia’s skin. On the flip side, she couldn’t tell Penelope about Remus, for obvious reasons, so she sort of had to keep her in the dark.

* * *

The week went by as normal, Mia went to her Defense Against the Dark Arts classes and exchanged looks with Remus whenever she got the chance, but this week felt like another regular old week at Hogwarts. Once Saturday rolled around, it was time for the Gryffindor Hufflepuff quidditch match. Mia had told Andrew that she would sit with him during the game, and as She, Penelope and Percy made their way to the quidditch pitch, she saw Andrew and a gaggle of Slytherins hanging about.

“Mia! Hey!” Andrew called and waved to her.

“wait, Mia, Andrew Flint?” Penelope asked with her brow raised, her blue eyes flickering at her.

“uhm..” Mia was starting to speak but interrupted by Andrew throwing his arm around her.

“where do you want to sit? Ladies choice” Andrew said as he mocked a chivalrous bow.

Mia rolled her eyes and pushed him playfully. She looked around at all the boxes and saw one that a few staff members, including Remus, were sitting in.

“let’s go to that one” she said and marched off towards it, the group tailing behind.

During the first part of the game, Andrew kept trying to put his arm around Mia’s waist while they sat on the bleachers. She kept finding ways to re adjust or turning to talk to penny that sat above her that would throw off Andrew’s angle. Remus definitely saw, and Mia had a pang of guilt for sitting near him because making him jealous wasn’t her intention. He would’ve been lying if he said he wasn’t jealous of Andrew sitting with Mia, but he tried to chalk it up to two friends enjoying a quidditch match. Andrew didn’t seem to notice Mia continuously trying to shake him off, either. They watched as Harry Potter and Cedric Diggory zipped around looking for the golden snitch, and the Weasley twins bashing bludgers every which way.it was an exciting game so far, both teams eager to win as usual. Oliver Wood would throw his fists up in the air and whoop with excitement every time a Gryffindor chaser scored. Everyone including Mia rolled their eyes at this, Wood was WAY too into quidditch, it was basically all he cared about.

All of a sudden, an icy breeze set in and Mia could see her breath in the air. Commotion from the stands erupted everywhere, and some of the chasers stopped flying to look around. A swarm of dementors came swarming at harry, causing him to pass out and fall from his broom. The entire crowd gasped and stood as the watched harry free fall towards the ground, broom getting swept away in the wind. Dumbledore cast a spell to stop Harry from falling and lower him safely to the ground. Most of the dementors flew off, but a lone dementor swooped down through the stands, and came right up to Mia. She began to hear a rushing sound, almost like what rapids in the river sound like, and felt very light headed. She then heard a voice, pleading to stop, and groaning in agony. She recognized this voice to be her father, on the night that he was tortured with the cruciatis curse. A silver mist whooshed past Mia, and she fell unconscious.

Panic erupted from the box that Mia, Andrew and the others were sitting in when a dementor attacked Mia. Remus had conjured the patronus, but Mia had already passed out and slumped over. Andrew was panicking, and Penelope was shrieking while Percy hugged her, dumbfounded and for once not jumping into action as Head Boy. Remus jumped down and propped Mia up.

“Mia, Mia?” he called to her as he shook her gently.

“she needs to be taken to Madam Pomfrey” Remus said to Professor Vector, who was staring in horror at what just happened. “I’ll take her to the hospital wing, you escort these students back to the castle”

He scooped Mia up almost effortlessly, and walked down the stairs of the stands to go towards the castle.

“Remus, REMUS!” called Dumbledore as Remus was half way to the castle. He turned around to see the headmaster was not far behind him “they’ve taken harry to the hospital wing, is Miss Roswell alright?”

“I think so, but it looks like she got a nasty blow from that dementor” Remus said. “I’ll see to it that she is alright.”

“Thank you, yes keep me updated. I need to go deal with the dementors and figure out why they attacked.” Dumbledore shuffled off in the other direction.

Remus looked down at Mia, she looked so peaceful in his arms, but he knew what she must of experienced before passing out was not peaceful at all.


	5. chapter 5

When Mia woke in the hospital wing, it was just her, Harry, and a Hufflepuff first year that she didn’t know laying in their beds. The Hufflepuff boy was puking up slugs into a bucket, looking quite uncomfortable. The sight of it made Mia feel like she was going to hurl up slugs too. Harry was still out cold, a hunk of chocolate sitting next to his bed. She looked at her own bedside table to see a chuck of chocolate sitting there for her.

Madam Pomfrey hustled in, “eat, eat, it will make you feel better”.

“What happened, Madam Pomfrey?” Mia asked, feeling confused from the events of earlier.

“My dear, you were attacked by a dementor. Professor Dumbledore is furious about what happened. Professor Lupin sent them off and brought you here straight away. You and Mr. Potter got a nasty blow. You’ll be ok, but eat that chocolate. It’ll help with the shaking. You may leave once the chocolate has been eaten. Your friends came by but I told them no visitors” Madam Pomfrey said firmly.

Mia wasn’t much in the mood for her chocolate, but did what she was told because when it came to being in the hospital wing, you had to play by Madam Pomfrey’s rules. She reminded Mia of her mother, a ‘take no crap’ attitude and fierce personality, but also a deeply caring witch.

“Oh and Miss Roswell, when you are finished with your chocolate, Professor Lupin requests to see you in his office.”

“Yes ma’am, thank you”. Mia said, biting into her giant chunk of chocolate.

* * *

Mia walked up to the large oak door to Remus’ office and knocked, poking her head inside.

“Hey.” she said softly, after surveying the office to see they were alone.

“Mia, thank you for coming by” Remus looked up, his eyes brightening when he saw she was up and moving. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m ok I guess, Madam Pomfrey gave me some chocolate” she shrugged.

“Yes, it really does help. I’m trying to figure out why that dementor came up to you after they went after Harry”. Remus said looking slightly puzzled.

“Yeah, me too” Mia said “was anyone else attacked besides us two?”

“No. they went for Harry first, but I think when the one went off on its own, it sensed something about you that it was drawn to.”

“Like what?” Mia asked. She wasn’t incredibly familiar with the dementors; that was supposed to be covered in their 6th year of Defense against the dark arts, but Lockhart cared more about talking about his books, especially gadding with ghouls, rather than teach them what they needed to know.

“Dementors feed off of emotions, they suck out the happiness and leave you with your most dark and dreary moments. I believe they are attracted to Harry because of the horrors in his past with his parents, and his less than optimistic upbringing. I believe this is the same case with you; the night that your family was attacked when you were a child.”

Mia felt her stomach drop. Did this mean she was a walking target for the dementors for the rest of her life?

“I do have something to confess to you” He continued, straightening up in his chair.

She sat down on the plush green couch that sat across from his desk.

“Your mother and I were both members of the Order of the Phoenix during the war. Susan was a vital part to the organization, which we believe made her a target. I was unavailable the night your family was attacked, but I was filled in after the fact by the ones who came to your house to help after the attack. I knew your father before his memory was altered, not well; he usually stayed out of Order things because he wasn’t a part of our world, but I also remember them telling me about Little Amelia who witnessed the whole thing. I never met you as a child, but I remember seeing your mom a few days after the attack, the only positive from it was that you were not tortured along with your father. Susan is a strong witch, even in that moment of terror, she didn’t divulge any information. Truly remarkable that she remained strong in that moment. I didn’t know how to tell you that the other night, when you were so upset” Remus looked at her with a kind expression.

“I’m actually glad you know about that night from someone else’s account besides mine. You probably got more details than I remember, since I was so young.” Mia said; Remus relaxed hearing that he hadn’t upset her.

“Thank you for telling me.” She got up to head out of the office “I’m going to try to get a little bit of rest, maybe try out that sleeping draught you gave me” she said casually as she was walking towards the doorway.

“Mia…” Remus called out.

She stopped and turned around to look at him.

“So, you and Andrew Flint…?” he began.

Mia laughed “I told you, were just friends or something like that” she said “I’m not sure why he was a little handsy at the match”

“I think he has a thing for you” Remus chuckled.

Mia rolled her eyes and laughed again “good bye Remus” and walked out the door.

* * *

Mia was eager to get back to classes to distract herself from the dementor attack. She had a pretty normal couple weeks of classes that kept her busy, not getting to spend much free time with Remus. The next few weeks mainly contained sly glances and the occasional shoulder brushing if getting the chance. She did have a semi-unpleasant conversation with him one day, when she didn’t do as well on a paper and she figured he’d ‘help her out with her grade’.

“It would be an extreme disservice to give you a grade you don’t deserve just to appease your mother’s standards, when you didn’t do the work required to get the grade you wanted. I care about your education too much” Remus had told her.

Mia most certainly rolled her eyes at this, but knowing he was right she couldn’t be too irritated with him. He really was a phenomenal teacher.

* * *

As the weather started to turn chilly, Mia arrived for a Defense against the Dark Arts lesson to find Professor Snape to be standing up front of the classroom again.  
“Hello class, Professor Lupin is out ill so I’ll be teaching class the next two days” Snape began.

As he started his lecture on boggart identification, Mia raised her hand and cut him off. “Professor- excuse me, but wasn’t Professor Lupin just out last month?”

“Miss Roswell, if you paid half as much attention in class as you did to counting the calendar, you’d be on track for better NEWT potions scores. Yes and he is out again, and needn’t I remind you not to interrupt me in my classroom, however temporary my presence in this class may be” Snape said curtly.

Mia slunk in her seat slightly. Snape was not her favorite professor, and she knew he would pick on her the rest of class if she didn’t shut up. She was also highly offended that he claimed she didn’t pay attention in potions. She most certainly did, but he always favored the Slytherin students before anyone else. She was the best in her year at potions, but he never praised her for this. Her NEWT score was going to be just fine, she’d show him.

Mia spend the next few minutes only pretending to pay attention, confused on how Remus was ill AGAIN, and didn’t say anything to her. Her mind jumped to Snape's last lesson, where she thought it was odd that he was covering Werewolves in a 7th year classroom. All of a sudden, it hit her. The last time he was out it was a full moon, and sure enough today was a full moon too. She knew this from her Divination lessons about planetary alignments. Her palms started to sweat and her heart pound in her chest. Was this a coincidence? As the panic attack came on stronger, Penelope noticed Mia’s demeanor had changed. It had been years since Mia had had a full blown panic attack at school, her last one as a third year that Penelope was present for, during the time when her stepmother was ill. Her breathing was heavy and eyes fixed on the floor in front of her desk. Her vision began to become blurry and spotty, and her hearing began to muffle. The last thing she heard before she hit the floor falling out of her desk was Penelope calling her name, trying to get her attention. She had begun to panic, because she realized that Remus Lupin was out sick for one reason. He was a werewolf.


	6. chapter 6

Mia awoke just a moment later, on the floor of the DADA classroom with a few students and professor Snape hovering over her. Snape looked less than pleased that she had just fainted.

“Miss Clearwater, would you please walk Miss Roswell to the hospital wing to see Madam Pomfrey?”

Mia was about to protest but decided not to argue, she did just pass out after all. As they walked down the corridor towards the hospital wing, Penelope began to fire a million questions at her.

“Mia, what happened, what’s wrong? It’s been years since you’ve had a panic attack.”

Mia was irritated by her flood of questions, but she knew that Penelope was just worried. She brushed her off with an ‘I’m feeling stressed about NEWTs excuse’, putting Penelope a little more at ease. Mia was just glad that she’d be able to get a few minutes alone while Madam Pomfrey would insist for her to rest.

* * *

Remus was back after a few days, but Mia was avoiding him as much as possible without making it obvious. She wasn’t sure if she should ask him outright if he was a werewolf, unsure if it was rude to ask, but also afraid of hearing it was true. She had focused her energy on hanging out with Penelope and by proxy, Percy, and made a couple more study session plans with Andrew to help him for his next big Herbology test. She would sit in the library before meeting Andrew and ponder the thought of him being a werewolf, her face buried in textbooks with as much information about werewolves she could find. As the days passed the thought of it was less and less scary to her. He was still himself; he had always been the same person, so why would her knowledge of his condition change anything?

She had overheard Harry Potter telling his friends that Remus was going to teach him some magic to help repel the dementors, and Mia felt her face go hot. _He’s going to teach hot shot Potter, so why wouldn’t he teach me? Maybe he is going to but hasn’t talked to me about it yet._ She knew it was time to talk to him; she couldn’t avoid him any longer. He had office hours that night for students with homework and lesson questions, so she decided she would pay him a visit after dinner.

When Mia walked into Remus’ office, he was working on some paperwork that he looked at very intently. When he noticed she walked in, he set his quill down and gave her a handsome smile.

“Mia, hey, what can I do for you?”

“Are you feeling better?” she asked, deciding to ease into the question.

“Yes much better, I am behind on some paperwork and essay grading unfortunately, so I’ve been playing catch up all day” he said, rustling some of the papers out of the way of his desk.

Mia couldn’t wait any longer; she sat on the armrest of the plus green couch and cast her eyes downward.

“Remus… why is it you are always ill on days that line up with a full moon?” she asked quietly.

She looked up at him; he had stiffened in his chair and had an odd expression on his face.

“the way you ask that question, Mia, sounds like you already know the answer” he said evenly, his tone calm but emotionless.

“You’re a werewolf” Mia whispered.

He nodded his head, his expression unchanged. They locked eyes, neither of them able to look away nor wanting to speak first.

“Are you frightened?” he asked emotionless after a minute, his tone still even and gaze locked on her.

“No” she began, getting up from the armrest of the couch and walking over to his desk. “more afraid to ask the question than to hear the answer”

She walked behind his desk and leaned against it, facing him.

“I had already come to terms with it before I even got the courage to ask you.” She said, “How long have you been one?”

He turned in his chair to look at her.

“I was 5 when I was infected.” He said, remaining emotionless.

 _5_ she thought _how terrible to experience that as a child._ She could tell that he didn’t want to relive those memories at the moment, so she changed the subject.

“I heard you were teaching Potter the Patronus Charm. I want you to teach me” she said.

His expression changed to slightly surprised.

“How did you know I was going to tutor Harry on that?” he asked

“I overheard him tell Hermione Granger”

“Mia, the patronus charm is extremely advanced magic…” he began.

“Potter is a 3rd year, I am a 7th year, and if anything I should be learning it before him. If a dementor comes near me again, you might not be able to protect me next time. I need to be able to defend myself.” She said firmly.

“You’re right. I might not be there next time. I am teaching Harry after the holidays are over, well start then.” Remus said sighing.

“Thank you.” She said curtly and turned to walk out the door.

“I wanted to tell you, you know.” He called before she got the chance to leave the room. “Any time a woman found out about what I was, it- it changed things. I didn’t want things to change between us” he said, looking down at his desk.

Mia turned back and walked over to him and cupped his face in her hands and kissed him firmly. She pulled away and looked into his eyes.

“I’ve read about the effectiveness of Wolfsbane” she began. “If you take your potion, I have nothing to worry about.”

He nodded, but he had a small bit of self -doubt that maybe one day she would realize the severity. If forgets to take his potion on time and she is with him, he would end up tearing her to shreds. He was dangerous, and he was afraid for her, but felt a small bit of relief hearing how calm she was about it. When he watched her leave his office, he recognized traits in her that her mother exhumed. She was fierce, stubborn, and typically got her way. He smiled and grabbed his essays to finish grading. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

* * *

Holiday break came around, and Mia was going home to spend the holiday with her mother. She and Penelope were packing up their bags to go home; leaving most of their school things behind since they would be returning for term after the New Year. They had a few homework assignments to complete while away from school, but the load was pretty light. They spent most of their time packing talking about the things they were going to do on break after their work was done, as well as the news that Hagrid’s hippogriff, Buckbeak, was to have a hearing pending an investigation where it attacked a student. Everyone knew though that the student who was ‘attacked’ Draco Malfoy was a whiny git who liked to use the threat of his father into getting what he wanted. Lucius Malfoy was a rather important employee of the ministry of magic, and their family had a long time feud with the Weasleys, so naturally Penelope hated them also.

“Such a git, that Malfoy kid” Penelope sneered. “That poor creature was probably just scared.”

Mia had zoned off, barely listening to Penelope go on about the hippogriff. Her mind wandered to Remus and she wanted to see him one last time.

“Hey, I forgot I have to ask a question about our holiday essay for Professor Lupin” Mia said to Penelope suddenly. “I’m going to run down to his office real quick- don’t leave without me?”

“Nope I’m going to leave you and make sure the train leaves so you’re stuck here” Penelope said sarcastically. “I’ll see you down by the entrance” she winked.

Mia rolled her eyes at her and smiled.

“thanks penny” she said chuckling, throwing her bag over her shoulder and headed out of the dorm.

She hated having to lie to Penelope, but what choice did she have? She was walking quickly to get to Remus’s office as quickly as she could, her thighs burning as she ran up flights of stairs. She had meant to stop by his office hours the day before, but Andrew insisted on her coming out to the courtyard to judge a Gobstones tournament that he started for the last day of term. He spent most of the tournament trying to sit next to her, testing if shed let him put his arm around her or not. Mia thought her eyes would roll out of her head if she spent any more time watching teenage boys get competitive about a silly yard game. Some of Andrew’s friends from Slytherin house, Trevor Greentree and Michael Bobbitt, got into a fist fight near the end, competition getting the best of them.

She popped her head into Remus’s office and knocked on the heavy oak door. Harry was just getting up from the plush green couch and shaking his hand goodbye.

“Hi, uhm, I have a question about our holiday assignment?” Mia said, caught a little off guard that Remus wasn’t alone in his office.

“Yes Mia, Harry was just heading out. Harry I’ll see you at the beginning of the term, enjoy the holidays” Remus smiled a warm smile at Harry. Mia and Harry exchanged hellos, and she watched him walk down the stairs and out of the classroom door.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you’d have company” she said, entering his office.

“Oh no matter, Harry and I had just finished” Remus said.

He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug.

“Are you all packed for the trip home?” he asked, still hugging her.

She pulled back and kissed him.

“I am, Penelope is waiting for me but I wanted to see you one last time” she brushed his bangs off his forehead and looked into his eyes.

He chuckled “it’ll only be 2 weeks.”

“That’s a long time!!” she playfully slapped his arm. “Won’t you miss me?”  
“Yes, I will.” He said quietly, his eyes flickered at her.

He cupped her cheek and gave her a small smile, gazing into her eyes for a moment. He broke the stare when he walked over to his desk and settled in the chair.

“What was your question with the essay?” he asked.

Mia was confused for a second, but then remembered she used it as an excuse to make her visit seem natural to Harry.

“You’re so thick” she snorted, walking over to his desk.  
“I figured you didn’t actually have a question” He smirked “you better get going; you don’t want to meet Penelope.”

“She can wait 5 more minutes, right?” she winked at him, unbuttoning her pants.

He gave her a grin and waved his wand, the door shut and locked and sealed with a silencing charm. She slid her pants and underwear off as he hastily unbuttoned his pants. She straddled him, pushing him into her. It was quick; both of them missing each other’s touch for the last month or so made it go much quicker. When they both finished, Mia kissed him firmly and hopped up quickly to get dressed. After fixing his pants, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her one last time.

“This will be a long two weeks” he chuckled and let her go from the embrace.

Mia walked backwards playfully to the door, smiling at him. “Have a good Christmas, Remus”


	7. chapter 7

Mia had spent the first few days of her holiday doing her school assignments, per Susan’s orders. She was happy to be home with her mother, but was getting a little bored without Penelope, and of course Percy, her favorite person to mock when he and Penelope weren’t paying attention. She also missed Remus; it was harder to be away from him than she thought it would be. Break was only for 2 weeks after all.

_Mia, he is your professor. Yes, it’s fun to have him fuck your brains out, but you really think he would want an actual relationship with you? He’s only a couple years younger than mum, once the school year is over he will probably move on the next pretty girl he comes across. He’ll never take you seriously because of your age. This is just fun to him._

Mia felt that her relationship, never put in that many words, was more than just a fun little fling, but she had been beginning to get self-conscious. They had been sleeping together for a couple months now, and she felt herself growing more attracted to him than anyone else she’d been with.

* * *

On Christmas Eve, Mia was sitting in her bedroom reading a muggle book her dad had sent her for the holiday, listening to her Walkman cassette player when an unfamiliar owl appeared at the window. Puzzled, she opened the window and let the owl fly in, seeing a small parcel tied to its leg and an envelope in its beak. She took the envelope out of its mouth, and saw it was addressed to her. She opened it slowly, unsure of its contents.

> Mia,  
>  I hope this owl finds you well and that you are enjoying your holiday. I was walking past a muggle shop and these made me think of you. I thought the color would suit you well, I hope you will like them.  
>  Merry Christmas  
>  RJL

It took her a second to realize RJL stood for Remus John Lupin, and her heart started to race when the realization sunk in. He sent me a Christmas gift, that’s a good sign, right? The owl snipped its beak at her, reminding her to open the package. She untied the small parcel and tore off the wrapper. Inside was a pair of beautiful garnet and white gold stud earrings, and a matching necklace. They were simple, yet stunning and he was correct. Mia looked fabulous in deep red. He probably spent more money on it than his robe budget, which made her have a pang of guilt that he would want to treat her with such a nice jewelry set. She knew from the reading she had done werewolves had trouble finding steady work, and many lived a hand-to-mouth lifestyle. She gazed at the set for a few moments longer, not believing that Remus actually sent her a Christmas present. The owl snipped its beak impatiently at her again.

“oh, sorry, let me give you a note to return”. Mia grabbed her quill and a piece of parchment and wrote

> Remus,  
>  Thank you for the earrings and necklace. You are correct, the color suits me perfectly. Holiday break has been nice so far, but I cannot wait to get back to Hogwarts to show you just how much I love them.  
>  Merry Christmas, Thinking of you  
>  AER

Mia decided to follow suit and sign her note with her initials, which stood for Amelia Evelyn Roswell. She sealed up her letter and gave it to the owl, and it swiftly flew out the window and off into the sky. She questioned if signing ‘thinking of you’ was too much, but it was true, he had been on her mind since the day she returned home.

* * *

Remus was pacing around his cottage questioning if sending Mia a Christmas gift was too much. _You spent too much on it. She claims she’s ok with what you are, but you’ll scare her away eventually. You always do. You’re dangerous. You’re also her teacher, for god’s sake, and you’ve broken maybe 50 school rules with whatever the hell it is your doing with her. But damn. She is perfect._ His owl returning interrupted his thinking process, but he was delighted to see that it had brought back a letter. He opened it and smiled. She liked the jewelry; he spent a chunk of money on it but wanted to get her something nice.

 

Remus Lupin lived a simple life. He had a small cottage in the woods on the outskirts of a wizarding suburb in England. His cottage had a cellar, where he would lock himself up and take his Wolfsbane potion, and spend the full moon cycles. He never replenished his closet of clothes much, as when the full moons came around he was having to buy new robes once a month, and decided to just sew them himself to cut down on the cost. He had always had a hard time keeping a stable job, due to the stigma around being a werewolf. He was either demanded to resign from positions, or would quit if someone started to suspect his nature. He was a skilled wizard, but most of the time had to resort to jobs as bar hands or as a laborer because no good job put up with his condition. When James and Lily were alive, they took very good care of him. Between them and Sirius, they took turns making sure he was fed and watching over him during the full moons, especially in periods where he went without work for ages. James had left him a good chunk of money and the cottage when he died. Most of their belongings and money had been left for Harry, but what James was able to leave for him was enough to survive on for the rest of his life, as long as he was very frugal with his money. His walk in a muggle shopping center was not a common one, he had a hell of a time finding a wizarding shop nearby to exchange his galleons into pounds to purchase Mia’s gift. He spent more on the jewelry than his monthly budget allowed for, but he couldn’t help himself.

* * *

Susan and Mia spent the New Year holiday in London. They stopped by Penelope’s family’s business before heading to dinner that new year’s eve. Penelope’s parents were muggles, who owned a fine wine and cheese shop where Penelope helped out on breaks and summer holidays.

“Richard, this gruyere cheese is phenomenal!” Susan said to Penelope’s father, sampling the some fancy cheeses while Mia helped Penelope stock some wine.

Penelope was telling her all about how her parents expressed to her that they wanted her to take over their business one day.

“Do you want to end up working in the muggle world? Or would you prefer a wizarding world career more?” Mia asked.

“Honestly I’m not sure. I could always open a shop in Godric’s Hollow or Hogsmeade, and run stores in both worlds” she shrugged, climbing down from the ladder she was on to stock the top shelf of Merlot. “My parents are making me take my equivalency exams for my muggle education next year. They said that if I take over the business I need to have them.”

she sighed, not looking forward to this.

“Oh me too, Mum and I were talking about it over break. She said I have to stay at home and take these tests, so my dad doesn’t get suspicious when I don’t know things of the muggle world.” Mia said flatly.

“Well, we can study and be miserable together at least!” Penelope linked her arm with Mia’s and they walked back to the front of the store.

“Ah girls, glad your back. I was going to ask you Mia, if it’s alright if the Clearwater’s join us for dinner?” Mia smiled, she enjoyed Penelope’s family and loved spending time with them.

“Yes absolutely!” she said, grinning at Penelope.

“I’ve got to stay here and close up shop. End of the year inventory is stressful time” Richard Clearwater said with a hearty laugh. “But you ladies go out and have fun.”.

 

The four ladies sat down at a little bistro just a few blocks up from the Clearwater’s wine and cheese shop. It was remarkable how much each daughter looked like their mothers. Charlotte Clearwater was a tall woman, with short curly ashy brown hair that hit just at her jawline. Her eyes were clear blue, just like Penelope’s. They both had a strong jawline, and larger facial features. Susan Roswell was very opposite in appearance. Susan was shorter, just a couple inches taller than Mia, with raven black hair that hit her collarbone. Her petite frame still had curves, just as Mia’s did, but her eyes shone a brilliant emerald green compared to Mia’s hazel. Susan always had a look of intensity about her, which Mia joked to her friends that it was because her mother was indeed, intense. The ladies chatted about the Christmas holiday and the girls’ taking their equivalency tests next year, Charlotte also had a ton of NEWT test questions, and of the wizarding teenagers that Penelope spent her time with.

“How’s this family of Penny’s boyfriend, the Weasleys?” Charlotte asked, in between bites of her pastrami sandwich. “Are they good people?”

“Oh, the best” Susan beamed. “Arthur and Molly, his parents, and I go way back. They are some of the fiercest, most loyal people you will ever meet. Absolutely adore them. A billion kids, but wonderful. They get a bad name in the wizarding world because they are a poor family, but money doesn’t buy happiness.”

Susan raved about the Weasleys for a good ten minutes. Mia had to stifle the eye roll once or twice because she knew her mother would throw the salt shaker at her if she dared throw sass in front of Charlotte. It was a shame that people looked down on the Weasleys for being poor, Mia figured that was probably why Percy acted so pompous half the time. Compensating for discrimination set against his family that got in the way every time someone looked at his flaming red hair.

* * *

Mia spent the night at Penelope’s the night before getting back on the train to school. Her family lived just 15 minutes from Kings Cross, so it was rather convenient to say with them. She waited to put her new jewelry from Remus on until she back on the train. She wanted to wear it for the New Year holiday, but she didn’t want her mom asking questions, as she was planning on telling Penelope her mom got them for her. The entire train was buzzing with the rumors that harry potter had received a new broomstick for Christmas, but Professor McGonagall had confiscated it, believing it to be from Black and potentially hexed. Mia however, couldn’t get her mind off Remus. She had thought about him all break, and couldn’t get her mind off him. He had also promised to teach her the patronus charm when they got back from the holidays, and she was ready to learn this valuable spell.

“those are nice” Percy said when Mia walked back into their train car after changing into her Ravenclaw robes.

“what, my robes?” Mia asked confused.

“no, your earrings” Penelope said laughing. “Christmas gift?”

“oh, yeah, from my mom” Mia said quickly. “what did you get, Percy?”

Percy went on to tell her all about how his mother knits all the kids sweaters every Christmas with the initial on it, and he got another sweater once again. Penelope got some clothes, a muggle stereo system and lots of candy that she would bring to impress her wizarding family friends. She offered some to the whole train car, but she and Mia had stayed up half the night snacking on it, so the thought of eating anything sweet right now make her stomach flip.

“Muggles know how to make candy” she always said.

Mia sat back and stared out the window, thinking of Remus and how much she had missed him.

* * *

After arriving at school, Mia unpacked her things and told Penelope she was going to head to the library to get a head start on her upcoming lessons.

“You know how my mum is about me getting my NEWT scores”

She was not lying about her mother’s strictness on grades, but lying about her whereabouts. She was going to see Remus. She scurried up the stairs of his classroom into his office, where he sat, doing some work at his desk.

“Mia- welcome back…” he began, as she shut his office door and sealed it with a locking charm and silencing spell. “What are you do….”

He couldn’t even finish his sentence. Mia had threw her arms around him and kissed him.

“I came to give you your Christmas present” she said as she was unbuckling his belt.

She kneeled down in front of him and removed his growing erection from his pants and began to stroke. Remus tried to speak again, but she cut him off.

“Stop talking, Remus” she ordered and took him in her mouth.

He gasped and stumbled backward slightly.

_Holy hell_ he thought as he closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensation. He ran his hands though her hair, feeling himself grow closer to climax. As he released, Mia swallowed and smiled at him.

“How was that?” she asked, hopeful that she did ok for him.

“Oh my god” he breathed. “That was amazing. How did you learn to do that?” he asked, impressed that a witch of her young age was so skilled at sucking cock.

“That was my first time” she blushed. He looked at her surprised.

“Seriously?? You’d never know it” he said with a hearty laugh, pulling her to her feet and kissing her.

She started walking towards the staircase leading upstairs, throwing off her tee shirt unbuckling her jeans. She pushed them down and kicked them off as she stepped up the stairs. She turned around to see him standing in the middle of his office still, just staring.

“well, am I just going to have to fuck myself up here, or….”

He broke into a jog after her and caught her around the waist midway up the staircase. He picked her up and carried her onto his bed. His trousers were still sitting in the middle of his office, but he removed his button down shirt and left his white undershirt on. He turned to Mia and took in the sight of her kneeling on his bed. She was wearing the jewelry he gave her for Christmas; her hair tucked behind her ears to show off the earrings and was wearing a maroon bra and panty set that matched perfectly. He walked over to her and kissed her.

“mm that jewelry does look nice on you” he whispered in her ear and kissed her neck, sending chills down her spine.

He reached around her back and unhooked her bra, freeing her perfect breasts. She pulled him down to sit onto the bed, and she swung her leg over his lap and straddled him, kissing him fervently. She broke the kiss after a moment, but pressed her forehead into his, looking down at his undershirt.

“Do you keep your shirt on because of scars, or..?” she asked, now looking into his eyes.

He nodded “I knew if you saw the scars, you’d know exactly what I was,”

“Can I see them now?” she asked, holding the hem of his shirt waiting for him to give her the ok.

After a moment of silence, he nodded slowly. She pulled his shirt over his head, and gasped. She wasn’t expecting that big of scars. He stiffened and looked away, fearing that she was revolted by the sight.

“No, Remus, its ok, I’m sorry” she said, pulling his face back towards hers. “I just didn’t expect them to be so big”.

She looked down at them again. He had 4 very large scars that cut diagonally across his chest and abdomen, each scar about half a centimeter in width. He had a number of smaller gashes here and there and an outline of a bite on his right shoulder. She traced one of the large scars with her finger, he watched nervously.

“This doesn’t bother me” she said finally.

“You sure?” he asked with uncertainty.

“100 percent” she said, and kissed him.

She began pressing her body into him, deepening the kiss. After a few minutes of good snogging, he picked her up and flipped her onto her back. He swiftly slipped her panties off, and she parted her legs to allow him to take her. To her surprise, he sunk lower onto the bed, positioning his head between her legs, and began circling her clit with his tongue. Mia arched her back and pushed herself closer to him. She had never had someone go down on her before, a couple of the boys that she had previously gone out with wouldn’t do it unless she returned the favor, which she had no interest in doing once she realized the sex was no good with them. As he worked on her nub, he pressed two fingers inside her. She gasped at the pleasure, feeling like she was going to orgasm quicker than she ever had. She allowed herself to be consumed by the sensation, and moaned his name as she came, her muscles clamping down on his fingers. As she lay there in awe of once again, of how he was able to give her this much pleasure. He lay beside her, tracing his fingers around her navel gently.

“You ok?” he asked, giving her a small smile, watching as she breathed deeply, staring at the ceiling.

“More than ok” she breathed.

She turned to him and cupped his face with her hand and gave him a kiss.

* * *

The following week, Remus had arranged time with both Mia and Harry to instruct them on the patronus charm; however their lessons were going to be kept separate. Remus was worried that if they practiced together, he wouldn’t be able to give then enough one on one attention to teach properly.  
When Mia arrived at the DADA classroom for hers, Harry was just finishing up, shooting little silver mists out of his wand.

“Ah Mia, perfect timing, Harry and I were just going to call it quits for today.” Harry shook Remus’s hand, and their inaudible voices sounded a little bit like they were going to try again another night this week.

Remus moved a big black trunk out of the way, and pulled a dueling dummy with a black cloak thrown over it. Harry’s boggart was a dementor, so it was perfect for him to practice with, but Mia wasn’t sure what her boggart would turn into. It was just easier to create a fake dementor and leave some up to the imagination.

“Dementors feed on your dark memories, making you forget your happy ones. The best way to conjure a strong patronus is to derive strength from a happy memory” Remus explained.

Mia thought of a moment with Penelope in their 4th year, where she had spent part of the Christmas holiday with her family, muggles, making Christmas cookies and other traditions. As she repeated the incantation Expecto Patronum, it took a few minutes before she was able to get even a hint of silver to erupt from her wand. She focused on the memory of them singing Christmas carols around the piano, remembering how cheerful she felt in that moment, and a little sliver of silver came out.

“I did it!!” she said, very proud of the little silver wisp.

“Let’s keep working,” Remus said, “we still have a long way to go”.

After about an hour, Mia hadn’t made much progress on her silver wisp.

“What memory are you thinking of?” he inquired, sensing her frustration on her face.

She told him about Christmas at Penelope’s, and the cookies and singing.

“I don’t think it’s strong enough” Remus explained. “You need to take the VERY happiest moment in your life, allow it to fill you up, overcome every other emotion you have, and use that energy to create the spell. A very effective patronus presents as an animal. If you can conjure that, you’ll be golden” he said. “Take a moment to think of a new memory”.

Mia closed her eyes and thought hard. _When was I the happiest??_ She racked her brain for a moment, until her mind rested on Remus. She looked at him and replayed all the memories of him that she had in her mind, and just the mere thought of him made her feel safe, so calm, so happy. She nodded to him, ready to attempt the spell again.

“Ok Mia, try it again.”

She took a deep breath, allowing every moment of Remus to swarm back into her memory allowing herself to feel the safe and happiness she felt being with him, and said “Expecto Patronum”.

A Giant silver wolf flew out from the end of her wand, and was prancing around the room. Mia whooped with excitement, but Remus stood there, dumbfounded. _Her patronus is a wolf._ He thought to himself. Mia noticed he wasn’t cheering with her.

“Remus, what’s wrong?” she asked, her face fell.

“Nothing, it’s just curious, that’s all.” He said, staring at the silver wolf making its way back to Mia.

“Why curious?” she said, not quite understanding.

He looked at her with a peculiar expression. “My Patronus is also a wolf”.


	8. chapter 8

Mia practiced her patronus charm once a week for a couple weeks with Remus during office hours. She had gotten so good that she could produce a wolf every time she conjured it. They also worked on other dueling spells together, her getting so good at them that it left plenty of time during their lessons for a romp here and there. He even commented how much better her positioning was, fixing her left side issue he always harped on her for. They also had many conversations over tea, about their interests and hobbies, and things going on in the world. Remus was half-blood also, but his knowledge of the muggle world was slim compared to Mia’s.

She also began tutoring Andrew in a couple more subjects to prepare for NEWTS. She was starting to spend quite a bit of time with him, but she mostly agreed to help so much because it was also extra studying for her. She could’ve sworn he had tried to put his hand on her thigh once during a study session at the library, but she shifted her leg and he jumped a little, so it might’ve been an accident.

Professors Flitwick had decided to reenact Lockhart’s dueling club, but only for 5th years and above. Mia loved going to dueling club, she excelled at her offensive and defensive spells thanks to Remus’ tutoring. Oliver Wood would complain that it would be better if they dueled on broomsticks, making it more athletic. Percy had a stick up his butt, thinking he could hex anyone better because he was Head Boy, but Mia sent him flying onto his arse, becoming dueling club hero. Even Andrew Flint started campaigning that Mia be captain of the dueling club. He said she was the ‘hottest chick dueler he’d ever lay eyes on’. She rolled her eyes every time she heard him say it.  
Trevor Greentree and Penelope were excellent members as well, but a good show was Fred and George Weasley. They always brought their own dung bombs and joke shop supplies to throw off their dueling opponent, much to Flitwick’s extreme dissatisfaction. As much as she loved being good at dueling, she loved showing off to Remus more. He was co-running the club with Flitwick, and she could tell he was impressed with her improvements in spells that he helped her with at the beginning of the year, and she wanted to continue to get better to impress him more.

* * *

On a snowy night in February, the castle awoke in uproar when rumors or Sirius Black entering the castle were being circulated. Ron Weasley had claimed that Black was standing over his bed with a knife, but ran when he saw Ron had awoken. The Gryffindor common room was evacuated again to the great hall, realizing that Neville Longbottom, a poor, blubbering 3rd year had left a piece of paper sitting out with the Gryffindor common room passwords out on a night table, since the new portrait kept changing them, was probably how he had gotten inside. Percy was in uproar at breakfast, when he and Penelope were talking about the alleged attack and what that could mean for the rest of the year.

“Students should be sent home.” Percy said “they keep us in school until the last possible moment, but is that doing anyone any good?”

Mia was zoned out, afraid of the threat that a killer was on the loose in her school, but felt a little secure about being in a different house. She decided to swing by Remus’ office before her History of Magic class, thinking he may have an insight to yesterday’s news.

As she walked in to his office, he was standing over his desk, looking at an old piece of parchment with his face twisted in frustration.

“Hey, you” Mia said quietly.

“Your perfume smells heavenly today” Remus said looking up at her and his expression softening when he looked into her eyes.

“Shut up” she snorted, plopping down on the plush green couch. “You cannot smell my perfume from all the way over there.”

“I smelled it from when you turned the corner of the corridor” he said, pouring her a cup of tea and then sitting next to her. “My sense of smell is much stronger close to the full moons” he explained.

“Sod off, Remus, you’re full of it” she laughed, thinking he was trying to get a rise out of her.

“It’s true!” he chuckled “didn’t you cover that in your essay on lycanthropy for Snape?”

She rolled her eyes, “yeah, yeah. Kind of.”

Her mind thought back to all the reading she did about werewolves in the library before the holidays, and did vaguely remember reading about increased sense of smell when the transformation was near. She didn’t tell him how much research she did before talking to him, nor did she feel he needed to know, so she changed the subject.

“What was that parchment you were looking at?” she asked, turning her eyes to his desk where the mysterious pamphlet lay.

“Oh just a piece of contraband I took off a student” blowing off the paper that he seemed so puzzled by moments earlier. “I will be out again, starting tomorrow” he said, changing the subject.

“Does it hurt? The… transformation?” Mia asked.

She had read that it was one of the most painful things someone can experience, but she wanted to hear it from him.

“Yes… it feels as if your entire body is stretching and cracking” he began, his voice even and emotionless.

Mia had caught on to the fact that when she asked Remus anything about his being a wolf, it’s as if all the emotion drains out of him and he becomes very technical.

“I remember everything I do, even if I do not have control over my mind. The Wolfsbane potion at least allows me to keep my mind, even though I do go through a physical transformation.”

“Have you killed anyone?” Mia asked suddenly, realizing how rude it was to ask after the sentence left her lips.

“No. but it is my greatest fear. I’ve always kept myself under lock and key. Even my parents did a good job of making sure I didn’t get out when I was a child” He said, looking down at the floor.

Mia scooted closer to him, sitting in his lap and straddling him. She kissed him and wrapped her arms around him. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her close against him.

“I didn’t come here to question you about your illness” she said “I wanted to see if you had any information on the attack. But I feel like there is something better we can do”.

They began to snog furiously for a minute or two, until she stood up and waved her wand at the door. It slammed shut and locked. She took his’s hand to lead him upstairs, but let out a shriek of a giggle when he swept her off her feet and carried her up the second flight of stairs. When they reached the bedroom, he threw her onto the bed, climbing on top of her and kissed her roughly. He ripped her button down shirt open, buttons flying everywhere.

“REMUS!” she roared at the state of shirt. “Easy, this is my favorite uniform shirt”

“We’ll fix it later” he said hastily, grabbing at the waist of her skirt and yanking it off quickly.

“REMUS, STOP, before you rip more of my clothes! What’s gotten into you?” she cried, grabbing her skirt and inspecting it for damage.

He wasn’t usually one to play rough, he most of the time had been rather gentle with her. He sat up quickly, as if snapping out of a trance.

“Sorry, I can get a little rough this close to the full moon. I can’t always control my emotions.” he said sheepishly, running his hands through his hair awkwardly, realizing he could’ve scratched her, or worse.

“Maybe we shouldn’t do this today; I don’t want to hurt you.” He said, getting off the bed.

He waved his wand and Mia’s shirt repaired itself, never knowing it was just ripped apart a moment ago.

“Ok” she said quietly, feeling guilty that she made him feel like he’d done something wrong.

She wouldn’t’ve minded it a little rougher today, she would’ve enjoyed it, but she just wasn’t expecting it and didn’t want her school robes to suffer for it either. His gaze remained downward as she exited the bedroom and walked down the stairs back to his office. He grew angry at himself for allowing his emotions to take over him like that. For her to be infected it usually took biting whilst in wolf form, but a scratch from a werewolf, whether in human or wolf form, leaves a permanent scar. He wasn’t sure if she could be infected while in his human form, but didn’t want to take the chance to find out. As she was about to walk out of the office, she pulled him into a kiss.

“I’ll see you in a few days” she said, her face close to his. “And just so you know, I trust you not to hurt me.” She said, giving him a small smile, then turning to exit.

 _You shouldn’t he thought._ He had only allowed himself to have sex once this close to a full moon, and he practically beat the girl to death doing it. He had met a pretty girl while drinking at the Leaky Cauldron, and found his way upstairs. He scratched her up pretty good, and could tell he bruised her from grabbing her too hard. She seemed to like it at the time, but he fled in the middle of the night, fearing that he might have infected her or that she would find out what he was when the scars didn’t heal. He didn’t usually keep long term girlfriends around. Occasionally he would date a girl for a couple months, until she started to pick up on signs of lycanthropy and broke it off suddenly. That was how they all would end. No one wanted him when they knew what he was.

* * *

Remus was back just under a week later, but his demeanor was different towards Mia. He wasn’t rude or callous, but wasn’t as warm to her as normal. In fact, he seemed much closed off from all students, even she overheard Harry Potter saying to his friends that he thought Remus was acting strange. She was concerned by this sudden change in him. She wanted to go and see him one evening this week, but she had herself swamped with tutoring sessions with Andrew, and she promised Penelope they would have a girls evening in the dormitory. At the end of her Defense against the Dark Arts lesson on Friday, she was able to snag a few minutes alone with him.

“What’s going on?” she asked “you’ve been acting strange this whole week”.

“Sorry Mia, I’ve gotten behind with my paperwork and it’s been challenging to catch up” he said, not making eye contact “should be better after the weekend”.

“Sure, ok, I’ll see you after the weekend”, she said, irritation in her voice.

She had to wait a good 3 days during the moon time to see him, and now he was blowing her off? A girl’s night with Penelope sounds like just what she needs.

 

Back in the dormitory, Mia had changed into her pajamas and was sitting on Penelope’s bed, eating a bag of Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans. She was careful to sort out the ones that she knew were gross, like bogey and vomit, but she accidently ate an earwax flavored bean, mistaking it for buttered popcorn. Penelope giggled as Mia gasped about the nasty flavor of the bean, enjoying the perfectly safe licorice wand she was consuming.

“Mia, I know your secret.”

Mia practically choked on her grape bean.

“What secret?” she asked, heart pounding.

_Did she know about Remus? How much did she know?_

“I know you’re seeing Andrew Flint.” Penelope said quietly, with a sly smile.

Mia rolled her eyes and laughed.

“I am not, Penny. I’m just helping him with his NEWT classes” she knew she was going to have to give Penelope some kind of information. “I am seeing someone though, kind of, it’s complicated” she began.

“WHO?! Oh, I knew you were sneaking around with someone, Amelia Roswell. Spill it!”

“I’m not comfortable sharing his name, we haven’t talked about what we are yet, and I think he’d prefer to be anonymous. But the sex is amazing. Honestly the conversation is better. Talking with him is so mentally stimulating. He’s perfect. I think I’m falling in love with him.” Mia said blushing at the last sentence she spoke.

It kind of just blurted out like word vomit, but it was true. It wasn’t like Mia to talk about her feelings like this, but her feelings for Remus have been intensifying for some time now.

“Oh Mia, that’s wonderful!” Penelope cried “do you know where his feelings are at?”

“Sort of? No I guess not. He has always been so attentive and sweet, but this week he’s been acting off and I can’t figure out if I did something or if something else happened that he’s not telling me about. He blew me off the last time I talked with him.” Mia said.

“you need to sit down with him and tell him exactly how you are feeling” Penelope started “lay it all out on the line, if he feels the same way, great, if not, it will suck but at least you won’t waste your time.”

Mia knew Penelope was right. She needed to confront Remus and tell him exactly what she was feeling.

* * *

That Saturday night, Mia was preparing herself for her talk with Remus. She was hoping he was in his quarters tonight, as many of the teachers ventured off to Hogsmeade for drinks on the weekends. He should be there. He claimed he had a bunch of paperwork to finish up this weekend, so hopefully he wasn’t blowing me off. She thought, changing into some casual clothes. She pulled on her favorite jeans over an emerald green bra and panty set. She looked in the mirror at her breasts, adjusting her bra to comfort. Her dark hair and porcelain skin was complimented by the richness of the green. Her thin frame still had a little curve to it that these jeans showed off so nicely. Her butt was contoured by the back pockets, giving her a rather shapely behind. She clasped the necklace Remus gave her for Christmas around her neck, and pulled on a black tank top and a grey hooded zip up. She put in the matching earrings, looking at herself again. She unzipped her hoodie half way, and adjusted her tank top to accentuate her cleavage, and set off out of the dorm to his office. Her heart was pounding with nerves and excitement. She knew she was crazy for falling in love with a man 15 years older, and one who was her teacher, but she couldn’t just ignore those feelings. She wanted to be with him, only him, and was praying he felt the same. When she arrived at the classroom, she bolted up the stairs to his office, not wanting to waste any time.

“Remus! Remus, are you here? I need to talk to you” she barged into his office, swinging the door open hard.

She gasped at what she saw sitting before her. There, sitting on the plush green couch across from Remus, in plain sight, was mass murderer Sirius Black.


	9. chapter 9

Mia pulled out her wand instantly, pointing it at Sirius. Remus jumped up

“Mia, put your wand down” he said evenly.

“Remus, do you know who this is???” she hissed, not taking her eyes off of Sirius, who had his hands in the air to show her he was unarmed.

“Yes Mia, This is Sirius Black. Now please, put your wand down”.

Mia’s wand didn’t lower, but her hand began to tremble. Paralyzed by fear by the man sitting on the couch, she wasn’t sure what she should do. Should she run screaming for another teacher? Should she hex him herself? She then she heard Remus say “Expelliarmus” and her wand went flying out of hers and into his. Her head whipped around to him.“Immobulous” he said, and suddenly she couldn’t move.

She was unable to run away, to escape from whatever dark things they were planning in here.

“You’re helping him??!!” she yelled angrily, hot tears beginning to sting her eyes, frozen in place only being able to talk.

She couldn’t believe that Remus had anything to do with this killer.

“I asked you to put your wand down; you didn’t listen so I had to do what needed to be done.”

She shot him a look of pure hatred. Tears began falling down her face and she felt her blood boiling. Remus came over to her and cupped her cheek with his hand; Mia wouldn’t meet his eyes with hers, her chin quivering from holding back a bunch of sobs that were ready to burst.

“I’m sorry I had to use magic on you, Mia, But I’d like you to sit down with us, there’s things you need to know” Remus started.

“I TRUSTED YOU!!” Mia roared, the sobs breaking the surface.

She was in emotional distress from learning that the man she was about to tell that she loved him was working with a murderer.

“And your trust is not misplaced. I haven’t been lying to you. Please, come sit and here what we have to say. If you don’t like what we have to say, you can go run and get another professor and turn us in. I’m going to release you now, as long as I have your word you’ll sit?” Remus gave her that warm, kind smile that made her knees weak. “Mia, I need you to trust me”

She blinked a couple times, and then nodded slowly. Her instinct said to run, but the look in Remus’s eyes made her go against this urge. He waved his wand and she was released from the bind. He gestured her over to the green couch to sit where he had been sitting. Sirius was at the other end of the couch, sitting in an Azkaban prison issued robes, and in need of a good bath. He smiled at her, eyes flickering with some life in them, unlike the many posters of his plastered all over the wizarding world, where his eyes looked hollow, sunken, and cold. Mia sank herself into the furthest corner possible of the couch, Remus handing her a piping hot cup of tea. She started at it for a second, and then looked up at him.

“Oh Mia, it’s only my usual earl grey” he chuckled. She took a cautious sip.

“Remus, should we freeze her again? She looks like a screamer” Sirius was eyeing her, fear in his eyes that he would be revealed tonight.

“No I don’t believe that’s necessary. She’ll be a good girl and do as I ask. Right, Mia?” Remus looked at her, eyes gentle, but she returned an unpleasant gaze.

“Start talking” she said flatly, her gaze darting back and forth between Sirius and Remus.

They told her all about the Marauders’ Map, and how it never lies when showing someone’s location within the castle. They told her of the night when Sirius was framed, making it look like it was him who killed Peter Pettigrew and the other street full of people that terrible night 12 years earlier. They told her all about James and Lily, and how peter had sold them out to Voldemort and that Sirius would’ve died before giving away their location. Remus had believed Sirius was guilty until Harry mentioned seeing Peter’s name on the map. Once Remus saw it for himself about a day later, Sirius came round and explained what had truly happened. He had been wrongfully imprisoned, and Peter had been free for 12 years, living as the Weasley Family’s pet rat. Sirius wanted to kill the rat for betraying James and Lily, and causing him to be sent away to that wretched prison. As they explained more, Mia’s posture softened on the couch little by little. By the time they were done filling her in, she was sitting comfortably, sipping her tea.

“Mia, we need your word that you won’t tell a soul that Sirius is here. We don’t have the proof yet to keep him from going back to Azkaban” Remus said, kindly but firmly.

“You have my word” she said, nodding at Sirius who returned a smile.

“So this is the lovely Mia you’ve been boasting about all week?” Sirius looked at Remus, leaning back against the couch and relaxing his sitting position.

 _All week?_ She thought _maybe that’s why he had been acting strange._

“Nice rack, this one’s got. You weren’t lying about that” Sirius shot both of them a grin, but Remus’s eyes flashed at Sirius.

“Eyes up, Padfoot” he said pointedly.

“Easy, Moony, I’m only joking, kind of” Sirius threw a wink at her.

Mia rolled her eyes at him, but smiled at the men’s banter back and forth.

“It may have been 12 years since you’ve been able to chase tail, but this one is mine.” Remus gave Mia a small smile.

She blushed at him, sipping her tea.

“Well, exactly!! Once Pettigrew is gone, next mission is finding a load of babes and shag until I can’t shag no more!” Sirius chuckled.

“Yeah, ok Casanova” Mia said, Sirius looking puzzled at the muggle reference he didn’t understand.

“What’s a Casanova?” he asked Remus, face twisted up in confusion. Remus and Mia laughed, exchanging a look between each other that confirmed everything was ok between them.

* * *

Over the next couple weeks, Mia would return regularly to Remus’s office to hang out with him and Sirius. Mia was starting to grow to like Sirius, he was much more handsome once he had a bath and brushed his hair, and she loved how happy Remus looked to have his friend back. When it came time for another full moon, Sirius stayed hidden in his animagus form of a black dog in the forbidden forest, until Remus was recovered and could get him back into the castle unseen. They were formulating a plan to get the rat and keep as many people out of the loop until they could clear Sirius’ name, so Sirius was just hiding out in Remus’s quarters in the meantime. Mia had begged him to let her use the Marauders’ Map on a few occasions, but Remus wouldn’t let her near it, saying in his right mind of a faculty member he couldn’t give a student such an item. She rolled her eyes at him every time he said this. _He’ll break nearly 50 school rules just to fuck me, but won’t let me see a stupid map??_ She thought.

Mia also kept very busy with her tutoring, but she was beginning to think Andrew was playing dumb on purpose. After a long study session in the library, she and Andrew were packing up their textbooks to call it quits for the evening. They had cut their session very close to curfew, and if they didn’t get back to their common rooms soon, teachers and prefects would be out on patrol, ready to give them detention.

“Hey Mia, can I walk you back to your common room?” Andrew said his eyes darting around slightly, looking nervous.

“Sure, Flint, let’s go” she said, noticing his odd demeanor, but brushing it off. They chatted about the class until they got to a corridor not far from Ravenclaw Tower.

“Mia, hold on” Andrew said stopping. She stopped and turned to him “listen, we’ve been going around now for months, and I feel this is overdue”.

Andrew pulled her towards him and began to kiss her. The kiss caught her off guard, but she kissed him back for a minute, curious as to how she would feel about this. Andrew wasn’t a bad kisser, but it felt stale, hollow, no passion in comparison to how she felt when she kissed Remus. She was about to pull away to tell Andrew that she wasn’t interested in him when they both heard someone clear their throat. They stopped and turned, and there stood Remus with a peculiar expression on his face.

“Oh, hey professor, we were just…” Andrew started.

“It’s just past curfew, Mr. Flint.” Remus’ eyes flashed at Mia, and her palms began to sweat.

She had never seen him with this expression in his eyes before. She could tell he was not happy at what he had just found.

“You and Miss Roswell need to get back to your common rooms now” he said dryly, and turned on his heel and began walking away, not looking back.

Mia grabbed her books and took off for the Ravenclaw common room, Leaving Andrew standing in the hallway.

* * *

The next morning at breakfast, Remus wouldn’t even look at Mia. She kept trying to see if he would glance in her way, but he wouldn’t even look up from his gaze. Andrew came over and plopped down next to her, throwing his arms over her shoulders.

“Hey beautiful” he said smoothly, giving her a grin.

“Andrew… last night wasn’t supposed to happen.” She began.

“Playing hard to get I see, no matter, I can be into that.” He winked and turned to walk away, Mia rolled her eyes after him.

“I knew it was him!” Penelope said, sliding over to her.

“You have it wrong Penny” Mia started “he kissed me last night but he’s not the one I was telling you about. The one I was though, knows about the kiss and isn’t happy”

“You know what I’m going to say” Penelope began “go and talk to him! Tell him how you feel. You told him how you felt before, right?”

“No… I, er, got distracted.” Mia said awkwardly. She couldn’t tell Penelope that she wasn’t able to tell her teacher she loved him because a convicted murderer turned up that night.

“Oh honestly, Mia! Quit shagging all the time and just tell him!” she hissed disapprovingly.

Mia sighed. This wasn’t going to be easy.


	10. chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter has an excerpt that depicts an attempted assault. The section will be marked with ***** before and after for those who need to skim over that part.
> 
> Hope you all are enjoying this fic so far!

Mia walked up the stairs to Remus’s office with sweaty palms and her heartbeat in her ears. She wasn’t sure the extent of how upset he was at seeing her and Andrew kiss the night before. When she reached the top of the stairs, she took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. She walked in, relaxing her posture and trying to act natural. Remus was sitting at his desk, his sandy brown hair hanging around his face as he had his focus on his parchment and quill in front of him.

“What can I do for you, Miss Roswell?” he said flatly, not looking up from his desk work.

“I- I wanted to talk to you about last night” she stuttered “it wasn’t what it looked like from your perspective.”

“Oh I believe it was exactly what it looked like. You spend quite a bit of time with Andrew Flint, its only curious as to what you are doing in that time.”

“Remus, it’s not like that...” she began, but was cut off, his tone stern, and unlike him.

“Professor Lupin” he corrected her. “Now if you don’t have a question on this week’s assignment, Miss Roswell; that will be all”.

She was dumbfounded, he was calling her by her surname, which was a common thing from someone like McGonagall or Snape, but Remus was always much more informal with his students face to face. Not only that, he corrected her into calling him Professor, which was usually only done when she was around other students and teachers. She had been calling him Remus for months now, and she sensed he was ending things with her by the way he was speaking to her.

“I-“she choked on her sentence, not sure how to respond to him. He hadn’t looked up at her the entire time she had been standing there.

“That will be all.” He said again, continuing scribbling with his quill.

Mia felt the hot sting of tears fill her eyes, her heartbeat in her ears returned again, and she felt quite ill all of a sudden. She took off, sprinting down the stairs and out the classroom, headed for the girl’s bathroom to vomit. Remus threw his quill down once she had left his office, and ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

“That was a little harsh, Moony, don’t you think?” Sirius said, emerging from the bedroom and walking down the stairs into the office.

“Sod off, Padfoot” Remus snarled, getting up from his desk and walking over to the stained glass window that overlooked the quidditch pitch.

“Hey, don’t get mad at me, I didn’t snog her” Sirius said with a wicked grin, trying to make Remus ease up. It wasn’t working.

“I saw her Sirius; she was kissing that boy back. She is MINE and she had her tongue down someone else’s throat”

“Getting a little possessive, are we now?” Sirius chuckled.

“The wolf in me tends to get possessive.” Remus said quietly, looking blankly out the window.

“You love her, don’t you?” Sirius asked as he put a hand on Remus’s shoulder. Remus just nodded his head weakly.

“I should’ve known that a girl 15 years younger wouldn’t stick around. I should’ve known that when she found out about me it was only a matter of time before she would want to be with someone, well, not me. I’m too old, too poor…” his voice trailed off, looking back out the window again.

“Remus, I don’t think that’s the case. I think you should allow her to explain her side of things. It may not be what you think. I see the way she looks at you; I believe her feelings for you are true. If you push her away, that will be on you. Your choice, my friend.”

Remus sighed. “It always comes down to the wolf Sirius. My entire life I’ve been plagued by this illness that rules my relationships and job choices. She will want to be with someone young, and whole, whether she realized it already or not. I’m her teacher on top of all this, what on earth have I gotten myself into?”

“So, you’re just going to sit here and throw a pity party for yourself? That’s it? When things get tough Remus it’s easy to blame the wolf for all your problems and retreat into a bottle. But if YOU don’t allow her to explain herself, you will never know if things will work out. You owe her a chance to explain herself.”

Sirius wasn’t usually the one in the past to give Remus tough love, that was usually James, telling him to perk up and get out of his own head. Sirius was much more of the jokester type, so if Sirius Black got serious with you, you needed to listen. Remus, however, was not in the mood to listen to his friend. Remus ran his hands through his hair roughly. He took a breath and then walked over to where he kept his scotch hidden and poured himself a glass, slumping in to his desk chair. Sirius sighed in frustration, walking back up the stairs to the bedroom, muttering something crude about Remus being a drunk under his breath.

* * *

Mia barely made it to the girl’s lavatory before throwing up. She hacked as she vomited, tears streaming down her face and barely being able to breathe in between sobs. Her entire world was crashing down and she didn’t know how to cope. She loved him, and she hadn’t even gotten the chance to tell him. She heard a small knock on her stall door.

“Are you ok in there?” a girl’s voice asked as the door to the stall opened.

It was Hermione Granger, hair wild and bushy but her uniform was pristine and pressed perfectly. Behind her was Ginny Weasley, unmistakable by the flaming red hair that all the Weasley children had.

“I’m fine, Hermione” Mia said flatly.

“You don’t look fine” Ginny said.

“You don’t have to talk about what happened, but can we sit with you?” Hermione asked.

Mia nodded. Her and Ginny came into the stall and sat next to Mia, hugging her as she cried. _How pathetic_ she thought _you are being consoled by a 2nd and 3rd year. They probably don’t even like boys yet._ Yet still Hermione and Ginny’s presence did make Mia feel more comfortable. She cried in the bathroom for another 20 minutes, and then had the girls walk with her to her common room.

“Thanks” Mia said as they reached Ravenclaw tower. “Could we, uh, keep this between us?” she asked the girls, hopeful that by morning the whole school wouldn’t know about her meltdown.

“We won’t tell a soul!” Ginny said, winking at her.

She nodded at the two younger girls and headed up the stairs to the common room. Tonight was the night she was going to use the sleeping draught that Remus had given her.

* * *

The next week, Mia avoided Remus at all costs. She even skipped 2 days of his class, telling Penelope to cover for her if asked. She spun a story to her about helping Professor Sinistra with setting up the Astronomy class for the first years, but Mia knew that he would know why she was actually skipping. It didn’t seem like he wanted to bring it up with Flitwick, her head of house, because she faced no repercussions so far. She also did her best to avoid Andrew, who was on her hip the entire week. She kept trying to blow him off, but he kept appearing when she wasn’t expecting him to. He had tried to kiss her in the great hall a couple times, but she would dart away and make an excuse as to somewhere she needed to be.

Friday evening that week, Mia was walking down a corridor not far from the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom, on her way back to Ravenclaw tower for the night. She was thinking of Remus, as the full moon would be here the next day, she always worried about how difficult his recovery was going to be. She was feeling pain in her chest from anxiety of not being able to see him, hug him, and have her affection returned. Out of nowhere, she felt something grab her arm. It was Andrew. He grabbed her upper arm and pushed her against the stone wall of the corridor.

*********************************************************************************************************************  
“You’ve been avoiding me.” Andrew said, flatly.

The smell of alcohol overwhelmed Mia as Andrew and she were sharing the same breathing space. The Slytherins were known to keep some alcohol stashed in their common room, but it smelled as if Andrew drank it all himself.

“Flint, I’ve tried to tell you that kiss was a mistake, I am only interested in being friends.” Mia said, questioning why he held such a tight grip on her arm.

“You think you can just walk around here, being a tease with your shirt unbuttoned down to your bra and your skirt hiked up, and not receive attention for it?” he growled.

“It isn’t yours that I am after. I am interested in someone else” Mia said sharply at him. “Now let my arm go, you’re hurting me. You’ve had a lot to drink and smell like the bottom of a bottle”.

“I can’t believe I liked you, you filthy slut!” Andrew yelled and slapped her across the face, causing her lip to bleed.

Mia pulled out her wand, but Andrew was quicker than she was and ripped it from her hand, throwing it down the corridor.

“You lead me on for MONTHS and when I finally come to collect you brush me off like I’m a dung beetle!”

“Andrew…” Mia started, her chin quivering.

He threw her onto the ground and kicked her in the ribs a few times. She cried out in pain, feeling them crack as he struck her. Her fight or flight instincts began to kick in, wanting to flee terribly, but she froze. She was paralyzed in her mind, not able to fight back, but not able to run either. He grabbed her by her hair and dragged her onto her feet. She was scared, she had never seen Andrew behave like this before, and didn’t know what he was capable of.

Meanwhile, Remus was trying to keep himself distracted from the worry of the impending full moon when he smelled Mia’s perfume, faint, but unmistakable. He then got a strong wind of whisky, and a trace smell of blood. He opened the Marauders map to see the footprints of Mia Roswell and Andrew Flint down the corridor, together, in very close proximity. He slammed the map down and grabbed his wand. He was going to catch the two of them red handed, AGAIN, and that would verify that things were over between him and Mia. _I knew she could never love me. Never love what I am._ He followed their scent, remembering also were he saw the set of footprints on the map. When he peeked around the corner, he was horrified at what he saw. Mia was crying, with her lip swollen and bleeding slightly. Andrew had her pinned against the wall, her hands bound above her head with a rope binding charm. He was hiking up her skirt, ripping at her panties to get them off quickly.

“Andrew… please…” she begged, trying to free herself, but Andrew was stronger.

He was a foot taller than her, making it easy to overpower her.

“I’m going to teach you that if you act like a slut, you will get treated as one” he growled as he was fidgeting with his pants, her panties torn off of her and lying on the ground at her feet.

Remus felt anger flash over him, an anger he hadn’t experienced before, almost as if he was losing his mind during a wolf transformation. He ran up to Andrew and Mia, grabbing Andrew by the collar and throwing him off of Mia, his head banging against the stone wall on the other side of the corridor. With a wave of his wand, her hands were free.

“Mia- go to my office” Remus directed as he grabbed Andrew by the collar, who had been knocked out by the blow. “I’m taking this piece of shit to the headmaster’s office”.  
*******************************************************************************************************************************************************

 

Mia ran into Remus’ office and sat down on the plush couch. She curled up into a ball and kept crying. The slap across the face, Andrew ripping her underwear off of her, it all kept replaying in her mind. Remus had gotten there just in time, before Andrew had gotten the chance to do what he was planning. Sirius heard the girl’s sobs, and came down to see her crumpled in a heap on the emerald sofa.

“What did Moony do this time? Need me to straighten him up a bit for ya, kitten?” Sirius said in a playful tone.

His facial expression changed to stone serious when Mia sat up and looked at him, Sirius seeing the bruises on her and her swollen, bleeding lip.

“Merlin’s beard, Mia, what happened?”

Mia sobbed as she told Sirius about Andrew was drunk and attacking her, and how Remus found them and pulled him off of her. Sirius made her a cup of tea, and sat down on the couch with her.

“It’s not your fault” Sirius said after a minute of silence.

“It is though; he said I walk around this school looking like a slut. Maybe it’s true” she muttered, wiping her tears.

she was ashamed. Ashamed that someone almost defiled her, and she felt responsible.

“You could walk these halls naked, Mia, and you still weren’t asking for it. I am telling you, it is not your fault. Don’t blame yourself. Where is Remus now?”

“Dragging Andrew off to Dumbledore’s office; He knocked him out when he threw him off of me.” Mia said, thinking back to the relief she felt when he appeared.

“His aggression is up because of the moon” Sirius said. “I overheard your conversation last week… are you ok?”

“I’m fine” Mia said too quickly, Sirius picking up on the fact that she most certainly wasn’t ok with how she and Remus had left things. “He just hates me, that’s all.”

“He doesn’t hate you, darling” Sirius began, his eyes twinkling at her. “Remus is very insecure about his illness. Always has been. He goes through periods where the self-loathing is worse than others though. He’s convinced that he can’t have happiness because of what he is. He felt like that was validated when he saw you kiss that boy.”

“I didn’t kiss him, He kissed me!” Mia cried “I just kissed him back for a second because I wanted to see if it felt like when I kiss Remus. It didn’t. I love him, Sirius, and I didn’t get the chance to tell him. I love him regardless of if he’s a werewolf or not. I cannot live without him.”

Sirius smiled at her “well then, Kitten, you need to tell him. He needs to hear that from you. If he won’t listen, MAKE him listen.” Mia shed a couple more tears and nodded. “You want to play some Gobstones? Remus keeps a set in his drawers and I haven’t played Gobstones since I was a 6th year”

“Only if you’re prepared to lose” Mia sniffled, smiling and wiping her face. “Let me change and clean up first. I need out of these clothes”.

* * *

Remus dragged Andrew by the collar all the way to Dumbledore’s office without breaking a sweat. It might have been adrenaline, but it might’ve been the increased endurance and strength that came the day before the transformation. Dumbledore was sitting at his desk, working in a rather large dragon hide covered book that had at least 1000 pages in it.

“Albus, this boy attacked another student” Remus said angrily.

Dumbledore shifted in his seat, his eyes perked up from behind his half-moon spectacles.  
“Why is he unconscious?” he asked calmly.

“Well... I might’ve used a little too much force in stopping the attack…” Remus said sheepishly, scratching his head. “He was going to rape her, Albus, i walked around the corner in just enough time.”

Dumbledore looked shocked at the accusation against Andrew.

“Who was the student?” he asked.

“Mia Roswell” Remus said, looking down at Andrew with disgust.

“Where is she now? Is she alright?”

“She’s waiting in my office” Remus said,

“see to it that Miss Roswell makes it to the hospital wing tonight. Ill speak with her in the morning . leave Mr. Flint here, I’ll see him to the hospital wing myself and determine the best course of action.”

“thank you, sir” Remus nodded and walked out.

He broke out into a jog when he got around the corner, wanting to get to Mia as fast as possible.

* * *

When Remus got back, he found Mia sitting on the floor in one of his button down shirts, with Sirius across from her playing Gobstones. Her lip had stopped bleeding, but she had a bruise creeping up around her eye.

“Hey Moony, Come referee this next match” Sirius chuckled as he was sprayed in the face with whatever nasty concoction was used in Gobstones. Mia was smiling, seeming much more at ease now that she had been kept busy with the game.

“Sirius, I’d like to talk to Mia if that’s alright” Remus said warmly, giving him a look that said ‘thank you’ for caring for her.

Sirius nodded “‘til next time, kitten” he winked at her and sauntered off to Remus’s bedroom.

She giggled at Sirius’ funny walk, and then stood up to walk back to the couch.

“I borrowed a shirt, I hope that’s ok?” she said softly. “I needed out of mine” her eyes went to the floor as she was reliving the memories of an hour before.

“Are you alright?” he asked, sitting on the sofa across from her.

“I think so” she said, not meeting his gaze.

“I’m sorry” he said.

“For… me being attacked?” she asked, confused.

“For everything.” He began “I should’ve heard you out when you stopped by my office. I shouldn’t have shut you out because of something that seemed not what it was. I know that now, but I worry the damage has been done” his eyes were looking at the floor now, the slightest bit of tears forming. “If he had-“

“He didn’t.” Mia cut him off, not wanting to hear the words aloud. “You got there in just the right amount of time. How’d you know I was there?”

“I saw your names on the map, but it was your perfume that made me look.” He said, a small smile creeping onto his face, thinking about how lovely the scent mixed with her body’s natural smell.“And the scent of whisky, and blood”.

They were quiet for a minute, until Mia broke the silence.

“I came to your office the night I met Sirius to tell you something, Remus.”

She got up from the couch and began to pace. Remus held on to every word, curious as to what she had to say. Her fair skinned legs showed off nicely under the hem of his shirt, however tainted with a couple bruises from earlier. His shirt hung to her mid-thigh, and was much too large for her, but it gave her a sense of comfort to wear it. Mia leaned back against the stone wall of the office, looking at the floor.

“I don’t know how to say this, so I’m just going to say it.” She breathed. “I Love you, Remus. I have never felt this way about anyone before. I love you so much it makes me sick. When you were upset with me, my entire world came crashing down. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t think, I couldn’t stand the thought of losing you.”

Tears began to well up in her eyes.

“I didn’t mean to kiss Andrew, he kissed me first and I was curious if it felt like when I kissed you. It didn’t. There was no spark, no passion. It happened so fast and then you were there and I’m so so sorry”

She began to sob, tears now rolling down her face. Remus jumped up and came over to her, wrapping his arms around her, only to be stopped by her hissing in pain. He pulled the shirt up to see bruising all along her ribs, consistent with the thought of them being broken.

“Oh Mia, you’re injured worse than I realized”

Anger flashed through him again. He took a deep breath and tried to shake the feeling. His aggression heightened before the transformation, he had to work to keep his temper in check. He cupped her tear stained cheek and pulled her head up so her eyes met his. His crisp, blue irises were vibrant, and he gave her a loving gaze.

“That’s why I was so angry” he began, speaking just above a whisper. “Because I love you too.”

More tears fell from Mia’s face as he kissed her, the most passionate kiss they had shared to date. It was gentle as Remus knew she was injured and didn’t want to hurt her, but their connection between them strengthening as the finally revealed a deep part of themselves to each other.

As they pulled away, Remus spoke softly. “Please let me take you to see Madam Pomfrey, let her help you.”

Mia nodded, and began walking up the stairs to his bedroom to change back into her tattered school robes, as it wouldn’t be smart for her to show up at the hospital wing wearing only a professor’s shirt. When she walked in, Sirius was sitting in a dark corner of the bedroom, grinning at her.

“Did you and Moony kiss and make up?” he teased, knowing the answer because he had been eavesdropping.

“Out, Sirius, it’s not polite to watch a lady change.” She joked, pretending to be snobbish as she said it.

Sirius grinned at her “who said I was polite?”

Mia rolled her eyes at him, she was used to Sirius’ humor by now; she found it quite entertaining. She pointed to the door, and he winked and gave a chivalrous bow as he exited, sauntering off down the stairs. Mia chuckled to herself as she heard the gentleman down the stairs bantering with each other. She was so thankful she had the both of them to make her feel better after what had just happened.

 

Arriving at the hospital wing, Madam Pomfrey put her arm around her and hustled her in.

“my dear, I wish you would’ve came sooner, I would’ve been able to stop the bruising”

she got Mia changed into hospital robes, and performed some healing charms on her to fix her bones and ease some swelling. She also handed her multiple different potions to take, insisting on her drinking them all. The last one must’ve been a sleeping draught, as just a few moments after drinking it, she began to feel sleepy.

* * *

Mia woke to daylight the next morning, with a wicked headache and a visitor sitting by her bed. Professor Dumbledore was gazing at her through his half-moon spectacles, wearing robes of rich magenta.

“Ah, Miss Roswell, glad to see you’ve awoken” he said pleasantly. “How are you feeling?”

“My head is pounding, sir, but other than that, I think Madam Pomfrey has helped a ton.” She said hoarsely, taking a sip of water from the glass from the bedside table.

On the table was an assortment of candy that Penelope had brought by, and Mia saw that Dumbledore had helped himself to a couple licorice wands while waiting on her to wake up.

“Mia, I’d like to hear your side of what happened with Andrew Flint last night” Dumbledore asked.

She told him exactly how it happened from her perspective, leaving out of course details that would tip off Dumbledore about her relationship with Remus.

“Mr. Flint is having a complete schedule change so he will not be in any of your classes, and he has a laundry list of punishments coming his way. For the next couple weeks he is suspended from the grounds.” Dumbledore started. “He will be kept away from you as much as possible when he returns. I’ve also sent an owl home to your mother, letting her know that you are all right and what action we are taking against Mr. Flint”.

“You owled my mother????” Mia growled in frustration.

She knew Susan would be FURIOUS, and she didn’t want to have to deal with her mother making the situation into a big production when she just wanted to forget it happened.

“I know Susan can be difficult when she is angry” Dumbledore said reassuringly “but this was one event that we have to notify a parent. She won’t be angry with you, this isn’t your fault.”

“I know that, sir, she just will want to fight it out with his family and I just want to forget it happened”.

Dumbledore’s eyes twinkled at her, “soon this will feel like a distant memory. Just try to get some rest, please stop by my office if I can do anything for you.”

“Thank you professor” Mia said, watching his magenta robes swing back and forth as he exited the hospital wing.

As much as Mia had trouble pushing the thought of Andrew out of her head, she also kept returning to the thought of Remus. He loved her too, but she wasn’t sure what this was going to mean for them in the future. She couldn’t stand the thought of being without him, but she wasn’t sure how she could build a life with him as a werewolf. She then had a lightbulb go off in her head, remembering her werewolf essay that she turned into Professor Snape. She began thinking of all the information she had learned about werewolves, their transformation, and their minds before, during and after the full moon. It was clear to her, she needed to learn 2 very specific types of magic- and she knew just who to ask.


	11. chapter 11

Mia had been released from the hospital wing the following night, but when she walked through the halls she felt as if everyone was whispering about her. Her mother sent her an owl, letting her know she was glad she was ok, and that she would be contacting Dumbledore to ensure that Andrew was punished to her liking. Penelope tried her best to dispel any ugly rumors, but most of the school knew what had happened between her and Andrew. She wished Remus was around, but he was away as it was over the full moon. Sitting at the table during lunch, Marcus, Andrew’s younger and much less handsome brother kept shooting dirty looks at her. Some of Andrews other friends, Trevor Greentree and Michael Bobbitt, were whispering and sneaking glances at her.

“Ignore them, Mia” Penelope said.

Mia’s eyes snapped back over to Penelope across from her. She sighed as she took a bite of her sandwich.

“I just want to forget this” she said quietly.

“It’ll die down” Penelope said reassuringly.

Mia began to space off, thinking of what she needed to do to show Remus she was ready to commit to being with him after graduation. Her first visit was going to be to the resident Potions Master, Severus Snape himself.

* * *

During his office hours later in the week, Professor Snape was sitting at his desk grading essays on Draught of the Living Death, ready to claw his eyes out. _Don’t these insufferable students pay any attention??_ His focus was broken when he heard a knock at the door.

“Miss Roswell, what are you doing here?” he sneered, surprised to see her coming to ask a question.

“Hi Professor, I, uh, wanted to ask you for help with something” she began cautiously.

“Spit it out Roswell, I don’t have all evening” Snape turned his attention back to his essays.

“I was wondering if you could teach me to brew the Wolfsbane potion.” She blurted out.

Snape put his quill down and looked up at her curiously, sinking back in to his chair.

“The Wolfsbane potion is an extremely complex brew, what need would you have for it anyway?”

“I think after graduation I want to go into magical disease research” she lied “I figured if I knew how to brew the Wolfsbane potion, it would give me the upper hand on my resume”

Snape lifted one eyebrow at her. “Very well, you will be in my classroom at 6pm SHARP tomorrow, and we will brew a batch together so you can see how it’s done properly.”

Mia squeaked with delight “oh thank you so much Professor Snape!” she beamed at him. She honestly expected him to tell her to get lost when she asked about such a complex potion.

“No groveling, it’s beyond annoying. Run along Miss Roswell, I’ll see you tomorrow”.

* * *

Mia arrived in the potion’s classroom at 5:52 the next evening, even arriving before Snape. She took a seat at her usual potions table, and laid her head in her arms on the table top. Her mind was racing around the thoughts of Remus, her classes and the whispers from other students still talking about the incident with her and Andrew. She was beginning to feel stress overload, as well as the only thing she wanted to do was focus on her plan to show Remus that she was serious about what their relationship could be after she graduated. Many of her other classmates were talking about summer internships with the ministry, or apprenticeships they were going to begin after the summer holiday. Mia, however, felt as she would be stuck a student forever. Her mother was making her take a muggle education equivalency exam, a test that gives you your high school equivalency for dropouts and kids who are smarter than their age, sometime in the next year. Susan believed a well-rounded education was important, muggle and wizard. Mia had thought about following in her mother’s footsteps and becoming an Auror, but that all depended on her NEWT scores. Her deep thoughts were shattered as Snape’s sneering voice cut through the silence.

“Look alive, Roswell, this isn’t nap time. You will do well to remember that I am volunteering my time for this lesson, don’t make me regret it.”

“Yes sir” Mia said jumping to her feet. “I am ready to begin.”

She and Snape spent the next two hours going over the Wolfsbane potion, prepping and brewing the potion side by side so Mia could learn quicker. She actually liked this method of teaching from him; he was a lot less intimidating in a one on one lesson. His knowledge of potions and ingredients was incredible. He spent a few minutes explaining each ingredient to her, as she took detailed notes on their uses and properties. His voice was almost normal during this lesson, free of sneer and judgement. Mia could’ve sworn she almost saw him smile when her potion was near complete and going smoothly. She was starting to think that Snape wasn’t so bad after all, despite hating him over the last 7 years. As they were finishing up the potion, a knock came at the door. Remus walked in, a surprised look came over his face when he saw Mia standing there.

“Hi Severus, I didn’t mean to interrupt, I came by to collect some Wolfsbane potion. For class of course.” he said, not wanting Snape to know that Mia knew about his illness.

“Fresh out.” Snape said, the sneer creeping back into his voice. “However, Roswell is learning to brew the Wolfsbane potion as we speak. I will send her to your office with the vials from these batches.”

Remus and Snape exchanged a tense gaze “thank you.” He said calmly and walked out, catching Mia’s eye for just a moment.

Mia decided to play dumb, curious if Snape would out Remus. It was no secret that the two professors weren’t the greatest of friends.

“What lesson would Professor Lupin need 50 vials of Wolfsbane for?” she asked.

“No time for stupid questions. Stir that potion 48 times counter clockwise, and then 37 times clockwise before adding the dittany!” he snapped at her.

Mia fought the urge to roll her eyes. She took back her earlier thought; Snape was as bad as she thought before.

 

When her potion was finished, Snape brought out a case of vials for her to portion.

“Well, Miss Roswell, you did a competent job brewing this potion. I will write you a letter of recommendation stating your skill in preparing the Wolfsbane potion.” He said, the sneer gone from his voice again.

“Thank you, sir, thank you” she said, grateful for his lesson, and impressed that he was writing her a letter for her fake resume.

“Now scrub those cauldrons clean, I want them to shine like mirrors when you are done.” His lips curled up slightly, the sneer returned for that last sentence.

She cursed under her breath, she HATED scrubbing cauldrons.

* * *

Mia waddled to Remus’ office carrying a box of 50 vials of Wolfsbane potion. It was very heavy, and she wanted to make sure that she didn’t drop any. This stock could last Remus a very long time, and she was thankful he was able to have it. The Wolfsbane potion is extremely expensive, Many werewolves couldn’t afford it, so they were stuck losing their minds every full moon with their transformation.  
Harry Potter and Remus were sitting on the green couch having a cup of tea.

“Hey Mia, thanks for bringing those by. Could you put them upstairs for me, please?”

Mia huffed as she started up another flight of stone stairs carrying the very heavy box. When she reached Remus’s bedroom, she was startled by the sight of Sirius, standing in the doorway to the bathroom, the room dark enough to conceal most of his face. She tripped a little and jumped when she saw him, not expecting him to be there. The bottles in the box rustled loudly. Sirius put a finger to his lips to tell her to remain quiet and not give him away.

“you alright up there?” Remus called.

“Yes, I’m fine, just lost my footing”.

She ran over to Sirius and hugged him silently. As she was about to walk out of the bedroom, she put a finger to her lips also, letting him know she would keep quiet. As she came down the stairs, Harry and Remus were laughing.

“Did you enjoy your private lesson with Professor Snape?” Remus asked, his eyes twinkling with humor.

“Actually I did” she began “he’s a very good teacher, and he is quite lovely once you get to know him”

She half-lied, just to get under Remus’s skin. Harry snorted with laughter, and she could hear him tell Remus as she was walking out of the office “she must’ve hit her head or something”. Remus always encouraged Harry to be respectful of Snape, but couldn’t but chuckle at Harry’s joke. The pair of them laughed, and Mia giggled and rolled her eyes to herself as she walked down the stairs to exit the classroom.

* * *

Mia sat in the great hall the next morning, pondering how to obtain her next magical private lesson. She had read that werewolves do not attack animals, and remembered Remus telling her that James, Peter and Sirius had become animagi to keep him company during the full moon. Professor McGonagall was an animagus herself, being able to transform into a cat. Mia was anxious about asking her. She was able to spin a story to Snape as to why she needed to learn the Wolfsbane potion, but there is no reason that Mia could think of to explain why she wanted McGonagall to guide her into becoming an animagus. It was an extremely complex form of magic, and she of course couldn’t tell her that she wanted to be an animal so she could keep her teacher-boyfriend company during a full moon. She sighed audibly, and began buttering her toast a little too hard, causing the slice to crack.

“Easy on that toast there, Roswell” one of the Slytherin boys, Trevor Greentree, that used to hang around Andrew was walking by. “It might cry rape if you’re not careful”

The group of boys laughed as they walked to the other end of the Slytherin table. Mia’s fists clenched into tight fists, she felt her blood boiling. She was so tired of being called names and being made into someone she’s not. She didn’t want to be the victim. She didn’t want Andrew to be made into a victim either.

“Leave it Mia, it’s not worth it” Penelope started, seeing the anger rise on her friends face.

Mia did not listen. Her fight or flight senses kicking in, this time, she chose to fight. She picked up her wand and aimed right for Trevor, and sent him a slug vomiting charm. He unfortunately heard the incantation, and blocked it just in time. Mia jumped up onto the Ravenclaw table and climbed down the other side, sending any uncomfortable hex she could think of. Trevor was a skilled member of the dueling club, blocking all her spells she sent his way. He sent a few hexes of his own at her, but she was swift and blocked them as well.

“Expelliarmus” she cried.

Trevor’s wand flew out of his hand and across the great hall, and Mia held her wand to his throat, breathing heavily, anger still flooding her. She heard “Expelliarmus” from her left side, and her wand was out of her hand quicker than she was able to see who it was. A swarm of teachers had crowded around her, but it was Remus who was holding her wand.

“Miss Roswell, what on earth…” Professor Flitwick began.

Mia, unarmed, had a gut reaction and punched Trevor square in the face, breaking his nose.

“Eat shit, Greentree” she said, tackling him to the ground.

She got a couple good blows in before he struck her back, causing her lip to swell and bleed in the same place Andrew had gotten her. As she tried to strike him again, Remus pulled her off of him, holding her back firmly.

“MISS ROSWELL” Flitwick shouted again, shocked by the events that just unfolded in front of the entire school.

Snape pulled Trevor to his feet and walked him out of the great hall to the hospital wing. Mia tried to chase after him, blood still boiling, but Remus held her back tight.

“Amelia Roswell, what has gotten into you?” Flitwick came up to her, looking up with immense disappointment. “50 points from Ravenclaw for your poor judgement. This is NOT how we deal with disagreements”

“Disagreements, Professor?” Mia scoffed, Remus’ grip still tight on her.

“Mia I think you should take a deep breath...” Remus began.

“Shut it Moony, I didn’t ask you” Mia said pointedly, the only two people taking note that Mia referred to Remus by a nickname was Remus himself, and Dumbledore.

Turning her attention back to Flitwick, she spoke again.

“This is more than a disappointment. This is about the fact that I was attacked, and everyone thinks it’s ok to slut shame the victim.” She turned her attention to the swarm of students crowded around the fight. “Let’s all blame Mia, the big fucking slut, because Andrew most certainly didn’t get drunk and beat the shit out of me!”

She was out of control, she was fighting Remus’ grip on her, screaming at the crowd, hot tears beginning to sting her eyes out of anger and frustration. With a wave of Dumbledore’s wand, Mia instantly fell sleepy. She closed her eyes and was out quicker than blowing a candle.

“Alright, back to your plates, show is over” McGonagall shooing students away.

Dumbledore looked at Remus, eyes twinkling with curiosity.

“Remus, please bring Miss Roswell to my office, I’d like to speak with her about what just happened” Dumbledore said, giving him a look that told him he wanted to speak with him as well.

Remus realized that Dumbledore picked up on Mia’s use of his nickname. He muttered “moblicorpus” at Mia, and she stood up straight, as if invisible strings were holding her up like a marionette. She was unconscious, hovering 6 inches above the ground. Remus led her floating body out of the great hall, following Dumbledore to his office. Remus knew he needed to think of an excuse, FAST.

 

As they entered Dumbledore’s office, Remus situated Mia on the couch.

“How long until she wakes up?” Remus asked.

“Oh, maybe a few more minutes; just long enough that she should be calmed when she wakes.” Dumbledore said, taking his seat. “I’m sure Mr. Greentree deserved a good blow to the face, but unfortunately this is a very serious situation, since Miss Roswell struck first, she will unfortunately be spending a good few weeks in detention with Argus.”

Remus felt pity for Mia. Detention with Filch is the worst, he knew it all too well from his school days.

“Now, Remus, I must ask. Why is it that Amelia here referred to you as Moony?” Dumbledore’s eyes were twinkling, making Remus uncomfortable.

He was starting to formulate an idea based on how Remus had reacted during the situation with Andrew also, but didn’t have enough pieces of the puzzle to have the full idea.

“I’m not sure,” he began, running his hands through his sandy hair. “Her mother knew of my nickname in the order, maybe Susan refers to me as that and Mia just picked it up? Anger can make you say or do strange things.”

He wasn’t sure if his excuse was going to work or not, as Dumbledore showed no relief on his face.

“Something tells me, Remus, that your statement isn’t entirely true. I’m going to guess the reason is not one you care to share, however I must ask you to remember that actions have consequences. I’d hope there is nothing here that I should be worried about?” Dumbledore raised his eyebrows slightly, trying to read Remus’ body language.

“No sir, nothing to be worried about.” Remus lied; his tone calm as the black lake at sunrise.

“Very well, that’ll be all Remus, thank you.” Remus nodded and turned to exit.

He breathed a sigh of relief when he got to corridor outside Dumbledore’s office. He felt a pang of guilt run through him, knowing he was betraying Dumbledore’s trust. One side of his brain was angry that this man had given him the ability to get an education so many years ago, and gave him a job that actually challenged him, and he was stomping on it by rendezvousing with a student. The other side had deep feelings for Mia; it was more than just a hook up with a young girl here and there. She was honestly the only one that he could say he’s ever really been in love with at this point, and didn’t want to give that up. He knew they would have to be more careful going forward, as he was certain Dumbledore wouldn’t forget this.


	12. chapter 12

Mia woke on the couch in Dumbledore’s office very confused, and mouth feeling very dry. Her lip was swollen and tender when she touched it, and her head was pounding.

“I apologize that I had to knock you out, but you were quite irate earlier.” Dumbledore said, eyes twinkling.

Mia was much calmer now, and she realized what she had done.

“Professor, I messed up…” she began, but Dumbledore put his hand up to stop her.

“I know why you were upset, Amelia, and I understand. I believe Trevor deserved to be put in his place. However the way you went about it wasn’t the best choice. If you were experiencing issues with students, it is always best to report it to a faculty member to avoid situations like this.”

Mia nodded, knowing she would have to be punished for trying to curse Trevor.

“I cannot overlook a fight, so you will be spending detention for the next month with Mr. Filch.”

Mia cringed. She’d rather scrub 1000 cauldrons for Snape than serve detention with Filch. She wasn’t sure how Susan would react to the news. She would be disappointed that Mia lashed out, but she thought maybe somewhat proud for standing up for herself.

“Yes sir, I understand” she said quietly, looking at the floor.

“Your detention starts today, please stop by the hospital wing to see that lip is taken care of.”

“Yes sir” Mia said, and scurried out of Dumbledore’s office.

* * *

Mia had a ton of time to think to herself while in detention with Filch. Since he wasn’t allowed to shackle her to the ceiling by her ankles, she did A LOT of cleaning around the castle. She kept thinking to herself how she would convince McGonagall to teach her into becoming an animagus. She was thinking of Sirius telling her how him, James and Peter learned on their own by a book from the restricted section in the library when it hit her. _SIRIUS._ She realized. He could teach her, and she could be honest with him on her intentions of becoming one. She smiled to herself as she was scrubbing the floor, her thought only to be interrupted by Filch’s putrid voice.

“ay you, what are you smiling at? Keep scrubbing!”

Mia rolled her eyes when he turned his back, but Mrs. Norris picked up on this and hissed at her. _Stupid cat_ Mia thought, gazing into Mrs. Norris’ yellow eyes. Mrs. Norris gave a wave of her tail and trotted after Filch, the only person who liked this cat. She knew she needed to talk to Remus before getting a chance to see Sirius, she was certain he was probably angry at her for accidentally using his nickname.

* * *

After detention, Mia hustled through the halls to the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom, hoping to find Remus in his office. When she arrived, there was no sign of him. It was a Friday night, a lot of the teachers liked to head off to the 3 broomsticks for drinks on the weekends, so she figured he was out with his colleagues. This would at least give her the chance to talk to Sirius alone, if he were here. She tip toed up the stairs to the bedroom, to find Sirius asleep in Remus’ bed.

“Sirius” she whispered, and he jumped out of bed quickly, startled by her voice.

“It’s just me, Mia,” she said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Geez Love, you scared the living daylights out of me” he chuckled as he lit a candle on the bedside table.

“Sorry” she laughed “I came to ask your help with something.”

Sirius looked at her, curious, what could he possibly help her with?

“I need you to teach me to become an Animagus.” She said.

Sirius chuckled and looked at her with excitement. It’s been too long since he was needed. “You want to become one so you can keep ol’ Moony company during the cycle?” he asked, smiling at her.

“Yes” she replied, hopeful now that he would agree.

“Alright Kitten, ill teach you. It’s very complex though, so make sure you have gotten plenty rest and eat well. I’ll be retreating into the forest here for the full moon next week, we’ll learn it there. Come to the forest after dark on the night of the moon, around 1:00.”

She smiled a huge toothy grin.

“Thank you Sirius!!” she threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly.

“I heard about the spectacle in the great hall. How are you feeling?” he asked as they broke their embrace.

“Embarrassed, but also I’m glad I got to show these people I’m not one to mess with. How mad is Remus that I called him Moony in front of everyone?” she asked, fearing to hear the answer.

“Ehh, I wouldn’t say he’s angry… per se.” Sirius started, scratching his head. “Concerned, maybe? You should probably talk to him about that, though”.

Mia swallowed. She knew she messed up, but she was hoping her mistake didn’t cost her everything.

* * *

When the beginning of the week rolled around, Mia was scrubbing the walls of one of the corridors when she saw the strangest thing out of the corner of her eye. Hermione Granger wasn’t there one moment, but another she was, shoving a gold chain down the front of her robes. Mia had overheard Ron Weasley freak out about her school schedule multiple times in the halls, and she always blew his questions off. _This bitch has a time turner_ Mia thought, envious that a 3rd year got the privilege of having one, if anyone even knew. If Mia had a time turner, she would want to go back and change her calling Remus by his nickname in front of the whole school. She was planning on talking to Remus tonight if he was in his office, trying to think of how to properly apologize for her slip up. She hadn’t talked to him since her outburst with Trevor, outside of a lesson or two that she chose not to linger back from.

“Roswell, times up, see you tomorrow” Filch sneered at her, breaking her out of her clouds of thought.

Mia grabbed her sweater that she had pulled off and hung on a suit of armor, and headed straight for the Remus’ office. She quickly made her way up the stairs, and knocked on the big oak door before poking her head in.

“Come in” mumbled Remus, looking up from his desk and smiling when he saw it was Mia.

“Hey, listen, about last week…” she started, picking at her fingernail anxiously.

“Mia, I’m not upset, just concerned. I’m honestly more concerned at the way you went after Trevor Greentree.” He said, looking at her with concern. “You were so angry you lost complete control”.

“I know, and I’m so so so sorry I called you by your nickname, I didn’t realize it until later, I know that could’ve screwed everything up.” she felt a sense of panic.

She knew he said he was more concerned than mad, but part of her didn’t believe him.

“Mia, honey, calm down” he walked over to her and pulled her close.

He rested his head on top of hers, and gently stroked her back. “I know it was an accident. The only one who noticed besides me was Dumbledore. I fed him an excuse that might have worked this time, but we just need to be careful. However, if Snape was still in the hall at the time, he would’ve picked up on it and wouldn’t’ve let it rest ‘til he found out about us.”

She looked up at him, tears still glistening in her eyes. “You and Snape don’t get along, do you?” she asked, sniffling.

“Not exactly, our history goes back to our days as students, and it wasn’t always pleasant.” He said. “Really, Mia, are you alright? What got into you that made you attack Trevor like that?”

“He just said some slut shaming things like everyone has been, but I had had it last week. My anger just got the best of me, that’s all.” She said, breaking their embrace and sitting on the couch.

“Promise me that next time you come find me and let me take care of it? I have a feeling they wouldn’t act the same after a teacher went after them” he sat down next to her and took her hand.

“I’ll do my best” she said “I hope there isn’t a next time because I showed this school not to mess with me though”

She gave him a small smile, and both of them laughed.

“I promise to be more careful” she said “but I’m going to assume that I should limit hanging around your office for a couple weeks?”

Remus nodded. “Unfortunately, that might be best.” He said, looking down at the ground.

Mia stood up and kicked her shoes off. “Well then, let’s make this visit count.” She gave him a grin as she began walking up the stairs to the bedroom. He took off after her, picking her up half way up the flight of stairs and carrying her into the bedroom.

* * *

When the night of the full moon came around, Mia needed to sneak out of the castle to the forest to meet up with Sirius. She had laid down early that night to try to get a nap in to compensate for the lack of sleep she would get, but woke up in a cold sweat, disoriented and praying she didn’t oversleep. _12:38._ she thought as she looked at her clock. She had been having a nightmare, but this night was different. Rather than the vivid memories of the night her family was attacked, she was dreaming of the incident with Andrew. She was at least thankful that she would be seeing Sirius tonight, as it would distract her from the images playing over and over again in her head, keeping her awake. She slipped out of bed silently; praying none of the girls would wake up and hear her. She dressed in all black so she would blend in with the night, and snuck through the corridors out to the grounds. She was amazed that she didn’t come across a Prefect or Filch, especially because she didn’t want any more detention tacked on to the month she was already serving. She laughed to herself, thinking maybe the universe wanted her to learn this magic. When she got to the forest, she was met by a shaggy black dog that guided her in deeper, out of sight from the castle. After they were under the complete cover of trees, the dog transfigured into Sirius Black. His face was beaming.

“hello gorgeous! I hope you brought a snack, it’s going to be a long night.”


	13. chapter 13

Sirius and Mia spent most of the night working on her transformation with no luck. Mia was trying to transform into an Owl, she thought it would be fun to go flying without a broom. Just before dawn, Mia was getting frustrated.

“I don’t understand why this isn’t working. I was able to produce a Wolf patronus in a couple hours, why is this so different.” She said running her hands through her hair furiously.

“Ah, yes I remember Moony saying you had a wolf patronus. Maybe that’s your problem. You didn’t choose an animal that truly spoke to you. It is very rare that your patronus is different than your animagus.” Sirius explained.

“You and him talked about my patronus?” she asked.

“Yes, curious, isn’t it?” he asked, his eyes twinkling like stars.

“I guess” Mia said, not quite understanding why both of them found her patronus so curious.

There are only so many animals in the world; half of Hogwarts’s students probably had wolf patronuses in her mind.

“It’s almost sunrise, love, let’s stop here for tonight. I’ll be in the forest tomorrow night too. Meet in the same place?”

Mia nodded; Sirius could see she was frustrated with herself.

“Mia, don’t be frustrated. This is extremely complex magic. If you learned this in one night, well, that would’ve been too impressive.”

“I just hope I can learn it.” She said, looking down at the forest floor.

“I don’t have a single doubt that you can’t do this, but it will take time” He smiled, “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“Thanks Padfoot” she said, and turned to walk back to the castle.

“Oh hey, Kitten, if you could, bring me a couple pumpkin pasties tomorrow? I’ve got a real hankering for sweets out here” he called out, grinning.

She gave him two thumbs up and giggled to herself, watching him turn back into a shaggy black dog and run off into the forest. Sirius had started to become someone that Mia would consider a best friend, but she felt a pang of guilt when she thought of Penelope. Penelope had been her best friend since they were sorted into Ravenclaw together. They were thick as thieves most of their schooling, and when she started dating Percy, Mia was a little jealous that she wasn’t spending as much time with her as she was. Mia knew that this year she was doing the same thing to her, and that she knew Mia was not being honest with her most of the time. She hadn’t meant to shut her out, she might’ve have confided in her more if she wasn’t dating the head boy, thinking that most things Mia told her was being repeated to Percy. She was pretty sure that Penelope had kept her secret about her recurring nightmare, so maybe could tell her a little more than she had been and it would stay between them.

* * *

Mia had never gotten back inside the castle to her dormitory easier after hours. It was just daylight when she entered, all the 7th year girls fast asleep, including Penelope. Everyone would begin to wake up within the hour, and Mia was hoping to get just a couple minutes of sleep before then. She was extremely exhausted from her night in the forest. She laid her head down on the pillow, and closed her eyes. Next thing she knew, she was being shook awake.

“Mia, MIA, get up, you overslept.” Penelope was hovering over her, holding two pieces of toast. “We have Herbology in 15 minutes. Get up NOW.”

Mia shot up out of bed, feeling like she was hit by a freight train. She maybe slept 3 hours, and completely missed breakfast.

“I have toast for you; you can eat it while we walk.”

Mia was shoving her uniform on quickly, not caring if it wrinkled or if it were clean. “Why didn’t you wake me??” she growled, irritated by her lack of sleep and rude awakening.

“I tried, you were out cold. I figured you were up most the night and you just needed a few more minutes. I didn’t think you’d oversleep by 2 hours.” Penelope said, standing in the doorway.

Mia hastily threw her hair into a bun on top of her head without brushing it, and grabbed the toast out of Penelope’s hand and began shuffling down the stairs.

“You’re welcome!” Penelope barked irritatedly, trotting behind her, holding both hers and Mia’s textbook.

Mia stopped and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry Penny. Thank you. I didn’t sleep much but I shouldn’t be snapping at you.” She gave her friend a hug, textbooks squished between them.

“Come on, were going to be late” Penelope smiled and wrapped one arm around Mia’s waist as they hustled off to the greenhouses.

 

Later that day, Mia was able to take a couple hours nap after lunch between classes, which was much needed. She spent most of Herbology class trying to stay awake, and lunch was a blur from her level of exhaustion. She woke up from her nap feeling better, now thinking another all-nighter with Sirius was possible. She and Penelope were on their way now to potions class, the class most of them dreaded. Mia passed Crabbe and Goyle, Draco Malfoy’s thick cronies, walking down the corridor, with arms full of pumpkin pasties. Mia remembered that Sirius had asked her for some, so she ran up to them and plucked about 5 out of Crabbe’s arms.

“Hey, those are mine!!” he called after her, as she jogged to catch up with Penelope.

“Sod off, Crabbe” she called at him, laughing.

“Mia! That’s terrible” Penelope said scowling at her.  
“Those fat asses have plenty” she giggled, “here” she handed Penelope one of the small packaged desserts.

“I’ll save this for later. I’ve got night patrol tonight” Penelope said “I was supposed to have it last night, but Audrey asked me to switch with her so she could patrol with David.”

Audrey Nichols and David Marcum were 5th year Hufflepuff prefects, whom were dating and had been rumored to sneak off into classrooms together rather than truly patrolling the halls. Mia figured that this is why she was able to get in and out of the castle so easily, however with Penelope patrolling tonight, getting out wouldn’t be so easy.

“Aren’t Audrey and David known for snogging while on the job?” Mia asked.

“It’s rumored, they most likely won’t be prefects again next year due to the accusations. Percy is investigating this” Penelope said. “He’s patrolling with me tonight, however we are completely professional whilst on the job.”

Mia raised her eyebrows at Penelope “no temptation to just spend the night in an old classroom?” she said with a giggle.

“No! That would be against everything it means to be a Prefect.” Penelope exclaimed.

The two of them laughed, but Mia was beginning to worry. It would be one thing to sneak past Penelope, but Percy too? Her night was going to get a bit more difficult, but she knew of something that might help.

 

After dinner, Mia swiftly broke away from her friends, saying she needed to stop by Muggle Studies and ask Professor Burbage a question. She however, had no intention of going to the muggle studies classroom, and instead snuck into the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom, that was dark and had been closed up for the day, seeing as Remus was out ill again and wasn’t in his office. His door to the office to her surprise was open, and she went over to his desk drawers and tried to open them. Locked she thought, and pulled out her wand.

“alohomora” she said, but nothing happened.

_Really Remus????_ She thought, frustration coming over her. She went upstairs to his kitchenette off the bedroom, and grabbed a butter knife, and began prying at the lock. After about 5 minutes, she rendered the lock useless, breaking it and the drawer popped open. She mangled the thing good, but desperate times called for desperate measures. She found the very thing she was looking for in the drawer that would help her sneak around Percy and Penelope tonight; The Marauders’ Map.

* * *

Mia waited until the common room was empty before taking out the Marauders’ map. Dressed in all black, she was hoping to be able to remain hidden in the shadows in case she came across a prefect or teacher.

“I solemnly swear I am up to no good” she said in a hushed tone, pointing her wand in the center of the parchment.

The map lit up, and she opened it quickly and scanned the map of the castle. Looks like Professor Trelawney had patrol duty tonight; she was walking through the dungeons at the current moment. Percy and Penelope were on opposite sides of the castle, thankfully both away from Ravenclaw tower. She grabbed her backpack that she had packed with Sirius’s pumpkin pasties and some other muggle candies she swiped from Penelope’s Christmas stash, and took off out the common room, and down the hallway. So far so good, she made it all the way to the lower floor without being spotted, but her map showed Penelope headed right for her. She hid behind a suit of armor, pressing herself as flat as possible against the wall, pulling her hood over her face. She remained motionless in the dark corner, Penelope striding by, not seeing her. When she was around the corner, Mia felt like she could breathe again. She pulled open the map, She was safe from Penelope, but if she didn’t get out onto the castle grounds quickly she would be risking running into Professor Trelawney, who was slowly making her way in that general direction. Mia took off quickly, trying to be as quiet as possible. She reached the door that led her out to the grounds, and slid out quickly. She checked the map one more time before sprinting off to the forest, trying to remain out of the moonlight as much as possible. She stopped when she was a few feet into the forest, bending over as she tried to catch her breath from the run she just did. The familiar shaggy black dog came trotting up to her, licked her hand and began walking deeper into the forest. When they arrived in the same clearing as they were in the night before, Sirius transformed back in to his human form. He saw Mia open her backpack and start pulling out the desserts and candy she had brought him.

“Oh I am so happy I could kiss you!” he exclaimed, digging into his pumpkin pastie. “I haven’t had one of these in 12 years” he signed.

“I brought you some muggle candy too. Penelope swears by it” She giggled.

Sirius spent a good 10 minutes chowing down on the candy before they began their lesson.

“All the food tastes like sawdust in Azkaban” he had explained to her.

They spent most of the night trying to get Mia to transform, but again, no luck. As the sun began to peek through the horizon, they called it quits again and made plans to try again for the next full moon, Mia saying she was going to try to practice on her own if she ever got some alone time. Sneaking back up to the castle she looked at the map to see where the patrollers were, and swore under her breath when she saw Penelope’s name in the Ravenclaw dormitory. Percy and Trelawney were still out in the halls, but thankfully were not going to come across her if she got back to Ravenclaw tower quickly. _She must’ve noticed I was gone._ She thought, praying that this wasn’t the case and she had gotten too tired and needed to turn in. When Penelope had night patrols, if Mia had nightmares she would usually go and find her and they would walk and talk together until Mia felt comfortable going back to sleep. She would be very suspicious finding Mia wandering the halls alone on the night she had patrol duty.

Sneaking up to the common room, she tapped the map and said “mischief managed” and stuffed the parchment into her backpack. She tiptoed into the common room and up the stairs to the 7th year girl’s dorm, to find Penelope sitting on Mia’s bed, arms crossed.

“You know Mia, I find it very strange that you would be up wandering the halls and not come find me on my night patrol.” She said sternness in her voice.

“Penny, I can explain...” Mia started.

“I really do not know what’s been going on with you all year. You’ve been so distant, like you’re here but your mind is not. You’ve been icing me out for months. Ever since you’ve been seeing this so called mystery guy everything has been so cryptic with you.” Penelope said, frustration rising in her voice.

“You mean like how you were last year with Percy? It took you 6 months to tell me you guys were dating and you were always sneaking off to go see him with no explanation to me” Mia shot back.

“The only reason I waited so long to tell you is because he asked me to. His brothers would’ve tortured him about having a girlfriend and I didn’t want it to get back to them” She said “but I’m not talking about me here, I apologized to you for keeping it from you. But now it’s your turn to come clean. What is your deal? Why are you dressed like your robbing a bank and where did you sneak off to tonight?” the look in Penelope’s eyes was firm.

Mia knew she had to give her something.

“Let’s talk downstairs” Mia motioned for the door, and Penelope got up in a huff and stomped down the stairs.

Once in the common room, the girls situated themselves on a plush blue couch, Mia hugging one of the throw pillows.

“I can’t tell you everything…” Mia began “but I can tell you as much as possible at this point”

Penelope’s facial expression seemed dissatisfied by this, but she’d take anything at this point. She nodded and Mia continued speaking.

“As you know I am seeing someone, but I can’t tell you who it is still. Just like Percy, he asked me to keep it between us, kind of, but I know you will respect that because you did it for Percy.” She looked down at the floor.

“I didn’t run off to meet with him tonight though. I met up with another friend. Someone I recently became close with, but I can’t tell you who that is either. Just for now. At the end of the school year I should be able to tell you everything. I am learning some extra magic, and this friend was tutoring me. I’ve been distant with you because I haven’t been able to be honest.”  
Mia knew of Sirius and Remus’ plan to reveal their old friend Peter, and get proof to clear Sirius’ name. Once Sirius was clear, she would be able to talk about him freely, but currently the world still thought he was the one who murdered all those people. Their plan was set for 2 months from now, and she didn’t want to jeopardize it. The rat had already gone missing, and turned back up again, so it was a delicate ordeal.

“Alright Mia, ill humor you. ONLY because you are my best friend, and I am putting my trust in you that whoever’s secret your keeping is for yours and their own good.”

Mia breathed a sigh of relief as Penelope continued to speak.

“But you need to understand that we Prefects are trying to keep the school and students safe. Sirius black has broken into the castle, TWICE. What do you think would happen if you were wandering the halls and he had broken in again, and killed you because you were in his way?”

Mia wanted to laugh at this, because she was literally meeting up with the alleged killer. Knowing Sirius now for months, the accusations that he was a murderer were just plain silly to her.

“What about you prefects? They have you wandering the halls alone.” Mia asked, avoiding Penelope’s last question, treating it as rhetorical.

Penelope began to look uncomfortable, fidgeting with the hem of her uniform skirt that she was still dressed in from the day before.

“I’ve been pushing for team patrols” she said quietly, looking nervous at the idea of coming up to the alleged killer alone.

Mia took Penelope’s hand. “It’s going to be ok” she said smiling.

“I hope so” Penelope whispered. “I just worry about you Mia, I care about you”. The two girls shared a firm hug.

“I’m sorry for being so weird this year” Mia whispered, and she hugged Penelope. “Please tell me you’re not going to give me more detention” she laughed as their embrace broke.

“I’ll let you off with a warning” Penelope winked at her.

The girls retreated back up the stairs, hoping to maybe get a couple hours rest before the next day.

* * *

When Remus returned from his full moon cycle, he found the drawer broken in his office. Angry, thinking it was Harry who had broken in and stolen it back from him, was quick to pull him aside after class and confront him about it. Harry denied it profusely, Remus interrogating him about it for nearly a half hour, making him late to another class. After sneaking Sirius back into his office, Sirius informed him it was Mia who indeed broke the drawer and took it.

“She needed it, Moony, you shouldn’t’ve put such a strong locking charm on it”.

“what on earth could she have possibly needed it for??” he said frustrated, as he tried to mend the drawer.

“for sneaking around the castle, what else?” Sirius laughed.

He and Mia agreed to not say anything to Remus about their lessons until Mia was able to transform, her wanting it to be a surprise. He was glad it was at least her that had it, but as her teacher he really shouldn’t allow her to walk around with such a thing, even if it was him and his friends that created it in the first place. He always found drawing the lines with her complicated since they began their relationship, which he lectured himself about in his head profusely. _This is why you shouldn’t’ve gotten involved with a student._ He would tell himself, but his heart pulled him to her. He loved her, and he wanted to be with her, even if it made his job complicated.

* * *

After his first lesson back, Remus asked Mia to stay after class to talk about an assignment. Once the classroom was clear, he was able to speak freely.

“Where’s the map, Mia?” he asked, leaning against the table she sat at.

“Yeah, sorry about the drawer…” she started.

“Where is it? I can’t let you walk around with that.”

“Why not? You and your friends created it for the very reason I’m using it.” She said, giving him a smirk.

“As your teacher, I can’t let you in good conscience walk around the school with an item that allows you to break the rules.” He said.

“Oh, but we can fuck in your office?” she snickered.

His eyes quickly shot down to her, and her smile faded.

“We need it for the plan.” He said sternly.

“Fine, Remus, you can have it back. But I need it for the next month.” She said, rolling her eyes and getting up from her desk. “I promise you’ll have it back in plenty of time” she said, placing a kiss on his cheek after scanning the room to ensure they were not being watched.

“I’ll make it up to you for borrowing it” she said with a sly grin and walked out of the classroom.

He sighed in frustration. _She can be so difficult._


	14. chapter14

Mia finished out her detention with Filch, and she couldn’t be happier to be done cleaning the castle. No one had made any remarks or whispers about her while she was near ever since the incident with Trevor, and she was grateful for that. _They’re probably afraid of me_ she thought to herself one day. Most of the Slytherin boys that hung out with Andrew wouldn’t even look at her. Andrew was back at school, but he kept his distance per Dumbledore’s orders. His classes were all changed so he shared no subjects with her. A couple of his classes he was the only Slytherin in due to working around Mia’s schedule, as Ravenclaw and Slytherin shared 3 subjects together in the 7th year. She had to keep her distance from Remus still, to avoid the prying eyes of Dumbledore suspecting something. She missed him dearly, her heart panging to be with him every time she saw him. She hoped he missed her just as much as she missed him.

* * *

Everyone was gearing up for the final quidditch match of the year, where Gryffindor and Slytherin would compete for the quidditch cup. Mia was placing bets on Gryffindor winning, and so far if they did, she would be splitting 50 galleons with 4 other people. Penelope was hesitant to bet in this game, as she had lost 10 galleons to Percy when they betted during the Ravenclaw-Gryffindor game. She wanted to make sure that she got a seat near Remus during this game, even if she couldn’t sit with him, it made her feel comfortable to know he was near. She sat with Penelope, Percy and a few other Gryffindors about 3 bleachers below where Remus and a few of the staff members were situated. One of Ravenclaw’s resident weirdos, 2nd year Luna Lovegood, sat in the corner of their booth, head buried in an issue of the Quibbler, wearing some strange contraption on her head. Mia rolled her eyes at her. Luna was a nice girl, but she was quite strange. Usually the odd birds ended up in Ravenclaw, but Luna had to be the oddest one there. Mia was half wishing she would’ve came up with a drinking game where every time Oliver Wood cheered on his broom they would all take a drink , but they would all be so drunk ten minutes into the game she knew that would certainly be a bad idea. The game was an exciting one, keeping her attention most of the time, but she looked back and was able to exchange eyes with Remus. Once Professor Dumbledore came to sit with the other staff members, Mia didn’t look back anymore, knowing the headmaster would pick up on sly glances. When Gryffindor was announced as the winner, Mia jumped up and cheered, she won herself 10 galleons, out of the pot she betted on.

“See penny, you should’ve betted with me, you would’ve broken even” she laughed, as they exited the stands, catching the smile of Remus while Dumbledore’s back was turned.

* * *

Another full moon cycle came around and Mia was able to sneak back into the forest to meet with Sirius. She had only gotten a handful of moments where she could try to practice with no luck. This evening however, was going to be different. When they were in their same clearing, they were only at it maybe 2 hours when finally, the magic worked. Mia felt a pull in her abdomen, much like when she was in apparition class and was about to apparate, but she felt herself contract and then expand again, experiencing a very foreign feeling afterwards. She was on all 4s, but looking down she saw wolfs paws, not her own hands. She had done it. She transformed into a beautiful White Wolf, with hazel eyes that resembled her own.

Sirius was cheering “you did it! You did it!”

She transformed back into her human self, and threw her arms around him.

“I can’t believe I finally did it!” she cried, hugging him tightly.

“Finally?? Mia I don’t think you understand how quickly you learned this. It took me, James and Peter 3 years to master becoming an Animagus, some wizards take even longer. It is very impressive, curious even, how quickly you picked this up.” Sirius said, his expression turning serious. “You, my dear, are one talented witch”

Mia blushed at his compliment. She didn’t feel like a talented witch most of the time, compared to her mother she felt like a second rate wannabe.

“Come on, let’s go for a run.”

Sirius’ face brightening up again and he transformed into his black dog form. Mia followed suit and transformed into the white wolf again. Now that she had figured out the feeling, the second time was very easy to transform. She and Sirius ran through the forest for about an hour, she was getting very used to the feeling of being an animal when he stopped and became a man again.

After she transformed back, she spoke “aww are we done for tonight?”

“Yes, you’ve done wonderfully. I am very impressed. I think my work here is done.” He grinned at her.

She gave him another hug and turned to walk back to the castle.

“Mia!” he called after her.

She turned to look at him, a big smile on his face.  
“Thank you, for asking me to help you. It felt good to be needed again.”

She smiled back at him “thank you for teaching me. I’m glad I got to learn from a friend.”

As he watched her walk away, happiness flooded him. _Friend_ he thought. He knew that Remus was his friend, but to hear someone call him a friend after so many terrible years in isolation, it made him feel much more like himself again.

* * *

Mia waited until Remus had been back for a few days from the full moon cycle before stopping by to return the Marauder’s Map. She didn’t need to sneak out to see Sirius in the woods anymore since she now was now able to transform into the white wolf easily. She enjoyed being able to run as the wolf, faster and farther than she could in her human form. She wondered if Remus enjoyed being a wolf when he took his potion, but figured he probably didn’t give himself the chance to see if he did. He was always so afraid that he would hurt someone and end up infecting others with lycanthropy.

She knocked on the oak door to his office, finding him at his desk grading papers as he usually was during office hours.

“Hey, I brought you a present.” She said with a grin on her face, taking out the Marauder’s Map and handing it to him.

He chuckled. “Thank you for gifting me MY map. I haven’t been able to repair the drawer you got into either” he said with smirk.

“Well, don’t lock it so well next time” she said, hopping up onto the desk and swinging her legs around to face him. “Are you expecting anyone else to stop by?” she asked, loosening her tie so he got the message she was trying to send to him.

“Not tonight” he said, straightening up in his chair, his eyebrows raised.

He pulled out his wand and waved it at the door, it closed and locked, and he threw a silencing charm on it. She threw her sweater off over her head, and began unbuttoning her shirt. He reached up under her skirt and pulled her panties off, spreading her legs apart. He kissed her neck as she unzipped his pants, and began stroking his erection. He kissed trailed up and sucked on her ear lobe, making her giggle from it tickling. He positioned himself at her opening and pushed in slowly, Mia moaning loudly as he filled her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him as he fucked her; her orgasm coming much quicker than anticipated. Just a few moments later, he got his release, and they remained still, both breathing heavily. He kissed her gently.

“I love you” he said softly, their foreheads pressed together.

She looked into his eyes and brought her hand up to his cheek, but their moment was interrupted.

“You guys could’ve put a silencing charm on this door, too” Sirius’ voice called from up in the bedroom.

They both laughed as they realized he had heard the whole thing.

“Sorry!” Mia called, giggling.

When they both had redressed, they walked up the stairs to the bedroom to talk to Sirius. He was sitting on the bed, leaning against the headboard, looking visibly annoyed.

“It’s been twelve years since I’ve been able to make a gal moan like that.” He said in a huff.

Poor Sirius was quite the ladies’ man in his prime, and was missing his glory days. Remus and Mia blushed, shooting each other a quick embarrassed glance.

“What’s the matter Sirius, Azkaban short on bed wenches?” Mia teased.

They all laughed, Remus taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

“we need to go over the plan, Padfoot” he said, they were getting close to the right time to go after Peter, and get the proof needed to clear Sirius’ name.

“Yes, the plan.” Mia began “what should I be doing?”

“Nothing” both men replied in unison.

Mia scowled at them “what do you mean nothing? You want me to sit back and twiddle my thumbs??”

“Well, yes, kind of” Remus said, giving her a look of sympathy. “This could get messy, and I don’t want you getting involved in something you could get hurt in.”

Mia rolled her eyes. “You guys are no fun.” She huffed. “Can I at least know the plan?”

“Sure” Sirius chuckled, knowing very well Mia was unhappy with them keeping her out of the action. “I’ll be Snuffles,”

Mia snorted, interrupting Sirius. “Snuffles???” she laughed “that’s your name as a dog?”

“Yes, James named me” he said, looking rather offended that she was laughing at his pet name. “Anyway, I’ll be Snuffles, and when I see the kids with the rat, I’ll come running, and snatch him out of Ron’s hand. Ill drag him back to the Shrieking shack, and you’ll meet me there, Moony, and well force him back to human form and force him to come with us to admit what he did, freeing my name.” Sirius and Remus nodded to each other.

“And when do you plan on doing this?” Mia asked, picking at her fingernails, unimpressed with the simplicity of it.

“Any day now” Sirius said, “we have to just watch and wait for them to be alone. Crookshanks, Hermione’s cat is very intelligent. He comes around quite a bit when I am a dog; he will come and get me when they are alone”.

“Ok so you guys get to save the day and catch a real killer, and I’ll be in the castle pretending I don’t exist.” Mia scoffed.

“Mia, if you, as a student had prior knowledge of a convicted murderer hiding in the castle for months that would not end well for you. It’s for your own good.” Remus said firmly.

“Ok, ok fine” she huffed. “I need to get going; It’s getting close to curfew.”

She walked over to Remus and kissed him, and waved to Sirius as she exited the bedroom.

“alohomora” they heard her say, and the door creaked open. Remus listened to her footsteps grow quieter until she couldn’t be heard anymore.

“I hope she listens” He said after a minute. “I don’t want her getting dragged into this if I can help it.” Remus said with concern in his voice.

“What are your plans with her?” Sirius asked.

“Plans?” Remus said, looking confused.

“She’s graduating here shortly. What are your plans for after that?” Sirius’ face was serious.

“I haven’t thought about it. I haven’t wanted to think about it. I would like to remain on staff at Hogwarts, it’s the first job in years that hasn’t been below my skill level, but it’s quite hard to maintain a relationship when I live here in the castle and she doesn’t.” Remus looked at the floor uncomfortably.

“She is serious about you, I can tell” Sirius began “Mia is an extraordinary young woman. She’s one that you don’t want to lose if you can help it.”

Remus nodded. “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it”.


	15. chapter 15

NEWT testing came around at middle of May and Mia was very ready to get them over with. Her mother had sent her an owl the day before testing, wishing her best of luck on her tests. She was surprised there weren’t any sneering sentences about how she was expecting outstanding scores, it was a rather nice letter. She spent most of that month studying profusely, having cram sessions with Penelope in the common room while snacking on licorice wands.

After her Herbology test, Andrew Flint came walking up to her and Penelope.

“Hey, Mia, can I talk to you? He asked.

“Sod off, Andrew” Penelope hissed, but Mia held her hand up, curious as to what he had to say.

They took a few steps away from Penelope, who stood with her hands on her hips, giving Andrew the death stare.

“Listen, I just wanted to say thanks for all the help with my classes this year. I think I did ok on my NEWTs” he said, looking at the ground. “And I’m sorry, for what happened. You know…”

“Thanks Andrew” Mia said, feeling uncomfortable.

“So, are we ok?” Andrew looked up at her, eyes hopeful.

It took all of Mia’s energy not to punch him square in the face for asking such a stupid question.

“No, we will never be ok. But I accept your apology, and that will have to be enough.”

His eyes shifted downward and he nodded. He walked away without saying another word. Penelope ran up to Mia.

“Are you ok? What did he say?”

“He apologized.” Mia said flatly, not taking her eyes off of him. “He had the audacity to ask if we were ok”.

“Wow, he’s just as thick as his brother” Penelope said.

Both girls linked arms and started off towards their common room. Mia kept sneaking looks behind her shoulder to make sure Andrew wasn’t following them, feeling slightly unnerved to have spoken to him.

* * *

Some of the professors were spending an evening a couple weeks later at the Three broomsticks, chatting about end of the year celebrations, graduation, which students they would be said to see go and those happy to see go. Remus enjoyed having a drink on the weekend with his co-workers. He was particularly fond of Professors Vector, McGonagall, Flitwick, and of course, Hagrid. As they were all chatting, the topic of NEWTs came up.

“You know, we had 2 students this year get all Outstanding on their NEWTs” McGonagall said.

“yeh? Whose tha’?” Hagrid asked, taking a big sip of his Meade.

“Percy Weasley and Amelia Roswell” she said. “It’s most impressive”

“I figured Mr. Weasley would do well, but I am quite happy to hear that a member of my own house did just as well; her mother was just as talented as a student.” Flitwick said brightly. “What are the student’s plans for after school? They could get any job with those marks”

“Percy Weasley is applying to the ministry” McGonagall said, looking proud of the member of her house. “Amelia, on the other hand, I’m not sure.”

“Mia is spending the next few months studying and taking her equivalency tests for her muggle education” Remus said, his scotch making his voice sound gravelly when he spoke. “Her mother is very strict on education, and insists she receives education for both worlds. I believe she’s expressed interest in being an Auror like her mother.”

“She certainly has the fire to be an Auror. However she’ll need to learn to control her temper.” Professor Flitwick said curtly.

“Filius, she was attacked by someone she called a friend. Then, someone accuses her of instigating the attack. Yes she has a temper but you can surely understand where her anger came from.” Professor McGonagall said.

Remus was quite surprised that she stood up for her; Minerva McGonagall was usually a stickler for the rules.

“From the way my students describe it, the events of that night were vastly over exaggerated” Snape said from the corner of the table that he was skulking in.

Remus wanted nothing more than to hex Snape for that comment, but he didn’t let his anger show.

“Well, Remus, you broke up the attack, was it really as bad as the headmaster made it sound?" Professor Burbage asked.

“It was worse” Remus said, looking at Snape and then down at his scotch, swirling the glass as spoke. “He had broken a few of her ribs, and busted her face up.”

He looked at Snape, whose expression looked as if he had dung under his nose. After a pause, Remus kept speaking.

“Severus, had I not gotten there when I did, he would’ve raped her. Her robes were in shreds. He had been drinking whisky that apparently _your_ students keep hidden in your common room. Of course your students tried to say she over exaggerated. They knew Andrew Flint made a big mistake, but rather than do the right thing they tried to help him cover it up.”

Remus and Snape glared at each other for a moment, but McGonagall saved the conversation and changed the subject. Remus broke the glare and continued nursing his glass of scotch; he really didn’t like Snape, but not as much as Snape didn’t like him.

* * *

Mia was walking down the hallway, leaving the great hall when she saw Remus skirt around a corner suspiciously. She broke into a jog to catch up with him, wondering if the plan was happening. She had just gotten word that Hagrid’s hippogriff, Buckbeak was executed. Penelope was extremely upset; Mia had spent the last half hour comforting her. Mia wasn’t too happy about it either, the Malfoy git thought just because his dad works at the ministry he can get whatever he wants. Mia was so focused on thinking of the creature that she almost didn’t notice Remus sneaking by.

“Remus!” she called, just as he was about to go through a door to get outside.

She was sure he had heard of her perfect NEWT scores, but she wanted to get the chance to tell him herself.

“Mia, I can’t talk, plan is happening now!” he slipped out the door and out of site.

Mia huffed to herself. _I’ll just sit in this stupid castle and pretend I don’t exist._ It was a beautiful day in early June, she considered going to the courtyard to enjoy the hour or so before she would have to be in before curfew. She decided against it, thinking many other students would be out there, meaning Andrew and his friends, and she was avoiding him at all costs. Their conversation the other day was very uncomfortable, and she wanted nothing more than to never have to look at him again. She decided she would surprise Remus when he got back from helping Sirius and wait in his quarters. If she were caught sneaking back after curfew later, she figured they couldn’t do much to her anymore because graduation festivities were in a day and a half, and figured that they would wave detention.

She got up to his quarters above his office, and began making a cup of tea. She looked around his bedroom and found a copy of fantastic beasts and where to find them and decided to read a little bit to pass the time until he got back. She sat in his bed, sipping on her tea, and read for about a half hour until she started to get bored with the chapter she was on. She leaned back against the iron rail headboard, and sighed. She took a minute to observe the ceiling, and began looking around the room, observing the oak furniture and lack of décor to personalize the space. In his office he usually kept some type of dark creature in a cage or aquarium that he procured for lessons, but his sleeping quarters were less than interesting.

She looked down at the bedside table, looking at a half burnt candle and a vial of Wolfsbane. She picked up the vial and fidgeted with it. It was a bright blue color, almost glowing, and apparently tasted disgusting. Remus had told her that sugar rendered it useless, so he had to choke down the foul tasting potion without any aid. She looked at the vial for a couple minutes, then the thought that it was odd for Remus to leave this potion out came across her mind. She all of a sudden froze, counting the days in her head since the last full moon cycle, realizing that today was indeed the full moon. _Oh no, he didn't drink it._ She thought, her heart pounding in fear. She wouldn’t be as worried if she knew had locked himself up like usual, but he was free on the grounds, free to attack anyone since he would lose his mind when he transformed. She looked outside the window, the sun was setting, the moonlight would shine here soon and Remus would lose all control.

She jumped out of bed and raced down the stairs, struggling to get her shoes on quick enough. She dashed out the classroom and down the hallway, making her way to the grounds to head towards the Shrieking Shack, hoping to get to Remus in time. She bumped in to a couple 2nd year Gryffindors on her way out, not even stopping to apologize. The sun was setting quickly, and Mia was racing the daylight. She was angry with herself for not noticing sooner, had she been paying attention she would’ve noticed the vial on the bedside table and gotten to him before it was too late. She was running as fast as she could, the Shrieking Shack farther than she had realized when she was in a hurry.

When she was getting closer, she heard voices from down the hill near the edge of the black lake. She stopped and looked down, and saw Harry and Hermione following Sirius, who was moving an unconscious Snape by wand; floating in mid-air as if held up by marionette strings. Ron and Remus had a man tied to them that Mia didn’t recognize. She assumed this was Peter, and the sight of him made her blood boil. Ron was hobbling on one leg mostly, looking as if it was broken. She started running towards them, the sun having set and praying that she wasn’t too late. Just as she was a few yards away from them, Sirius and Remus saw Mia and their expressions turned surprised.

“Mia what are you-“Sirius began to say, as she held up the vial of Wolfsbane, unable to speak because she couldn’t catch her breath.

A terrible snarling sound startled the group; Remus was staring right at the full moon that was shining before them.

“Run! Now! I’ll hold him off!” Sirius called to Harry and Hermione, dropping the wand he was using to hold up Professor Snape.

Ron desperately was yanking at the ropes that were tied to him, trying to free himself. A cracking sound could be heard as he began to shift from man to werewolf, the sight horrifying to watch. Remus’ face was lengthening, and hair was sprouting on his face and hands. He yelped as he morphed into the creature he despised, the ropes tethering him to Peter and Ron ripping with the transformation.

Peter took this as his escape, grabbing the wand that Sirius had dropped. With a crack of a blue flash, Ron was on the ground knocked out, and Peter transformed into the rat he masqueraded as for 12 years, and scurried off. Sirius would’ve run after him, but he transformed into the giant black dog and fought Remus away from the others. Remus clawed at him, leaving injuries on his back and muzzle, yelping in pain as he wandered down to the shore of the black lake. Mia transformed into her white wolf animagus, and led Remus away from the group so he couldn’t attack them. Mia half expected him to try to attack her too, but much to her surprise, he followed her and seemed quite docile. She wanted to help Sirius, but knew if she led Remus back to them they would all be slaughtered. She led him deep into the woods, and he became distracted by a large group of wolves that he found. She was a little disappointed that he so quickly wanted the company of other animals, but she had to remember that he didn’t have control over his mind right now, and a large pack was probably more interesting than just one wolf. She left him with this pack, heading back the way they came in, hoping maybe she could think of a way to save Sirius.

* * *

When Mia was near the edge of the forest, she heard familiar voices. She got closer, and saw Harry and Hermione with Buckbeak, Hagrid’s hippogriff that’s execution was scheduled for this afternoon. Mia was confused for a moment on how Harry and Hermione were able to get into the forest with an animal that was supposed to have died hours ago, when she just saw them 45 minutes ago without the hippogriff. She remembered back to when she saw Hermione appear out of thin air, realizing they must’ve used the time turner. She hoped maybe they had thought of a way to save Sirius, and she wanted in. she walked up to them, her wolf form initially scaring them. Hermione had her wand drawn on her, so Mia transformed back to herself.

“Mia, oh it’s you.” Hermione breathed. “I had no idea you were an Animagus”.

“Yeah, I learned a couple months ago.” Mia said, her face turning serious.

Hermione narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth to ask her how she learned so quickly, being so young, but was cut off.

“Please tell me you guys have a plan to save Sirius, because if so, I want to help”

Harry and Hermione looked at each other, and looked at her with confusion.

“Never mind questions, I’m assuming you’re here with your time turner?” Mia asked, looking at Hermione.

“How did you-“ Hermione began, but Mia cut her off.

“Never mind that Granger” she said hastily. “What’s the plan?”

“Were going to fly Buckbeak up to Flitwick’s office, its where he’s being kept and break in.” Harry began. “We have to wait, until no one will be guarding the room, but well only have about 5 minutes to get him out.”

“We have another hour before we need to leave, make sure Buckbeak will let you ride him by then” Hermione said, pointing at the hippogriff chained to the next tree over.

Mia spend a few minutes with Buckbeak until he was ok with her touch and presence, and then spent the rest of the hour listening to how Sirius’ arrest went, how the dementors tried to suck his and Harry’s soul right there, until Harry from the future cast a patronus to save them, and that Dumbledore had entrusted them to save Sirius and Buckbeak. When it was time to go, they all 3 climbed on the hippogriff, and took off towards the castle. The night sky was beautiful, stars shining brilliant with the beautiful full moon shimmering over the black lake. Mia thought full moons were so pretty, wishing that Remus could see them this way, rather than living in constant fear of them. When they got up to the window where Sirius was being held, Hermione cried “alohomora!” and the window flew open.

“What on earth…” Sirius began to say, looking at the three of them in awe.

“Sirius, there’s not much time, you need to climb on” Hermione said, panic in her voice.

Sirius climbed out the window and situated himself onto Buckbeak behind Mia. Harry flew them down to a clearing on the other side of the castle, which was mostly in shadow. They got off of the animal, and Sirius stood before them. Mia felt tears began to well up in her eyes. Was this going to be the last time she saw Sirius?

“What happened to the other boy, Ron?” Sirius asked; his eyes full of concern.

“He’s alright, he’s in the hospital wing with a broken leg, but he’ll be fine” Harry said.

Sirius went up to Harry and hugged him.

“You look so much like your father, but your eyes, are your mother’s” he said with a warm smile. “I am so proud of you, they would be too.”

Harry and Sirius hugged once more, and he turned to hug Hermione. “I don’t know how I can begin to repay you for this.”

Hermione smiled at him, and put her hand reassuringly on Harry’s shoulder. Sirius turned to Mia, whose tears were now flowing down her face.

“Mia, darling…” he began, his arms outstretched to hug her. She pointed a finger at him, much like her mother did when she was telling someone off.

“You keep yourself safe, Sirius Black” she said, her voice breaking through her tears.

She threw her arms around him, giving him a kiss on the cheek and hugging him tightly. Harry and Hermione exchanged confused glances, unsure on how Mia and Sirius seemed so close. When they pulled away from their embrace, Sirius kept his hands on her shoulders for just a moment, giving her a warm smile.

“You make sure he takes care of you, you here?”.

Mia nodded and sniffled, wiping her tears. “You need to go” she said, gesturing to Buckbeak.

Sirius climbed on Buckbeak’s back, and looked back at the three of them. “Thank you…” he started to say, but all 3 yelled back at him “GO!”

He smiled at the three of them and said “this won’t be the last time we see each other. I promise” and squeezed Buckbeak with his heels.

The two of them soared off into the night sky, out of sight. Harry turned to Mia, who was wiping more tears from her face.

“How is it that you know Sirius?” he asked, with a puzzled expression.

“Never mind, Harry, we need to get out of here” she said, starting for the door of the castle that was around the corner from them.

They all ran inside, Harry and Hermione running back to the hospital wing, and Mia, towards Ravenclaw tower to sneak back inside her common room. She was able to make it into the common room and back up to the dormitory unseen, most likely due to the rest of the staff being called about Sirius escaping. She slipped into her bed quietly, Penelope and the other girls fast asleep. She was exhausted, but her mind was racing. She was happy that Sirius escaped to freedom, but was worried that Remus may hurt himself, or others, until the sun came up.


	16. chapter 16

Remus awoke the next morning in the middle of the forest, a sense of dread filling him when he realized the events of the night before. Peter had gotten away thanks to him, and he was praying Sirius hadn’t received the Dementor’s Kiss yet. He stood to walk back to the castle, hissing in pain when he placed weight on his right leg. He went to reach for his wand, feeling nothing but tears on his already tattered robes, realizing that Sirius had been using it the night before. He had no choice but to hobble back on an injured leg. His mind was racing, wondering about Harry, Hermione, Ron and Mia. Mia he realized when he pieced the memory back together of seeing Mia transform into the beautiful white wolf that led him into the woods last night. _When on earth did she learn Animagi?_ He wracked his brain, having a hard time that she would’ve learned this all within one school year. It took his friends 3 years to master their transformations.

 

It took him what felt like ages to hobble back into the castle and up to his office. The sun was already pretty high in the sky, and the clock on the clock tower read 12:37 as he passed it. When he entered his office, he was surprised to see Professor Dumbledore sitting at his desk, waiting for him.

“Ah Remus, are you alright?” He said, concerned when he saw Remus’ limp.

“Yes, I’ll be ok” he said, and sank down onto the emerald green couch.

“Remus, I wanted you to hear this from me. Severus let it slip about your condition this morning.” Dumbledore’s face turned serious.

Remus sighed heavily.

“The owls from parents are going to start coming in.” Remus said flatly. “Parents won’t want someone like me teaching their children. I guess this is it, Albus, isn’t it?”

“Not necessarily, it is my sole discretion to keep what staff members I choose.” Dumbledore said, giving him a kind half-smile.

“These people will eat you alive if you choose to let me stay. I guess this is my official resignation.” Remus said solemnly.

He didn’t want to leave his job, but this was always the issue for people like him. Once they knew what he was, he was either let go or forced to resign. Dumbledore came over and sat on the green couch with him.

“It doesn’t have to be. I know it will be difficult to see Amelia if you remain on staff, but you’ve been the best professor in this post in years.” He said, his eyes twinkling.

Remus looked up at him quickly and felt his heart began to pound. _How did he know…_ he thought, staring at Dumbledore, unsure why he was being encouraged to stay on staff if he knew about his and Mia’s relationship?

“There’s not much that goes on at Hogwarts that I’m not aware of, Remus. I will say I didn’t know for sure until last night, so I’m going to just assume this is a new thing and there was nothing I should’ve been concerned about this entire year?” Dumbledore asked, twinkling eyes and smirk remaining unchanged.

Remus ran his hand through his hair awkwardly, not answering Dumbledore’s question. He had the feeling that Dumbledore was choosing to assume this, knowing somehow that they’re relationship had been going on longer. Dumbledore must’ve asked this question rhetorically, because he spoke again before giving Remus a chance to come up with an excuse.

“I’ll send Madam Pomfrey up to look at your leg” he said. “I know you forgot your potion last night, there were no injuries reported.”

“Yes, I unfortunately remember everything. I’m just glad I didn’t end up killing anyone. What happened with Sirius Black?” Remus asked, fearing the answer.

Dumbledore smiled, eyes twinkling behind his half-moon spectacles. “He escaped”

“Escaped?” Remus asked in disbelief. “How?”

Dumbledore just smiled, and got up to leave the office.

“It is something we are both happy about.” He said, exiting the office.

Remus smiled as relief flooded him. Sirius was alive, even though his name wasn’t cleared; he at least he maybe had a fighting chance.

 

After Madam Pomfrey came up and healed his leg, Remus took a much needed hot shower before packing his things. He was beginning to feel more and more depressed about his decision to leave Hogwarts, but he knew that he couldn’t return for another year. He wrote up an official resignation to take to Dumbledore that afternoon, heart heavy with every stroke of his quill. He wasn’t sure what his plans were going to be going forward, but he was certain it would take him a while to find paid work. He packed most of his robes into his trunk, but leaving out a couple sets for the next day or so. Graduation festivities were tonight for the 7th years, so he was going to don his best set, which only had a few patches, for the celebration. He thought of Mia, he wanted to talk to her and tell her about his decision to resign, and ask her about her learning the animagus transfiguration, but he all of a sudden felt embarrassed. Embarrassed about himself, of what he was, feelings of self-loathing washing over him as he packed away some of his books. Another job, his favorite job to date, gone because of his condition. _You’re pathetic, Remus. She deserves better than you_ he thought _she deserves someone who can take care of her, not the other way around. She needs someone with money, with a stable job. Everything I am not._ He threw his copy of  Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them  across the room and shattered the mirror that hung on the wall. His hands ran through his hair in frustration. He loved her, but that didn’t mean he was meant to be with her.

* * *

Mia woke up with a heavy heart thinking of Remus. She was hoping his night in the forest went ok, as he was nowhere to be found at both breakfast and lunch. The Graduation ceremonies were this evening, beginning with the end of the year feast followed by a party for all the 7th years. She was hoping he would be there so she could get a few minutes to talk with him. It was common for students to talk with their teachers at this party, as many wanted to ask students about post-graduation plans and give them their best wishes.

“Does this dress make my butt look weird?” Penelope asked, holding up her light pink chiffon dress for the festivities this evening.

“No Penny, it looks great.” Mia chuckled, trying to perk herself up and seem like her normal self.

Mia was putting on the jewelry that Remus got for her for Christmas, still dressed in her bathrobe. Penelope had swiftly changed and pinned her hair back, excited to get off to dinner.

“Mia, come on, feast is in 10 minutes”

Penelope’s dress looked very comfortable compared to Mia’s tight fitting, curve hugging dress she chose for graduation. Mia zipped up the side of her dress and looked in the mirror next to her bed. The black dress hugged every part of body perfectly, and her hair looked perfect in the loose curls she styled.

“Damn you look hot!” Penelope exclaimed, grinning wildly.

Mia gave her a weak smile, looking good but not feeling good from the uncertainty of how the chain of events played out from last night.

 

After the feast, Mia was even more worried when she didn’t see Remus at the staff table. She figured he needed to recover from the full moon last night, but he didn’t think he would miss the end of the year celebration just because of some aches and pains. She wasn’t in the partying mood, but was polite when talking to Professor Vector and Flitwick about her taking her equivalency exams for her muggle education, and her potential plans going forward. She chatted with her classmates about their plans too, promising to keep in touch with a few of them. Percy was going on and on to anyone who would listen about how he was going to be interning at the ministry this summer, and what jobs he was applying for with them.

“I can get whatever job I want basically, with my perfect NEWT scores”. He said; his gleaming smile audible in his voice as he spoke.

Mia rolled her eyes every time she heard him say it. Andrew kept glancing her way, trying to be inconspicuous but failing miserably. Mia stayed as far away from him as possible, usually remaining on the outskirts of the room. After about an hour of mingling, she saw Remus enter and her heart flooded with relief. He was here in one piece, thankfully. She caught his gaze, he stared at her in a way that made her blush, and the first time she had felt pretty all night. _She looks beautiful_ he thought, his blue eyes shining bright, giving her a half smile. She was about to walk over to him, when she saw he was approached by Professors Dumbledore and Trelawney. She didn’t dare go near him with Dumbledore being so close, but Hagrid coming by took her attention quickly.

“’ello Mia!” he bellowed, towering a couple feet taller than her. “congrats on graduatin’ and doin’ so well on yer tests” his smile was wide and genuine.

“Thanks, Hagrid” she smiled. “It’ll be strange not being here next year.”

“Yeah, can’t believe another year has come an’ gone. Hopefully we’ll get a defense agains’ the dark arts professor that’s half as good as ol’ Lupin.” He said, looking over at Remus.  
  
Mia’s face fell; “new professor? You mean Professor Lupin isn’t coming back for another term?” she asked.

“No, ol’ Snape let it slip that he’s a werewolf, reckon he’s prolly scared o’ what the parents will say when they fin’ out. Turned in his resignation today” Hagrid said somberly.

Mia instantly felt sad. She knew how happy he was to have this job, and she was certain he resigned because he felt like he had no other choice. She looked at him from across the room, he unaware that she was staring. His handsome face lit up brighter when one of the professors he was talking with cracked a joke. She loved the way his blue eyes crinkled slightly when he smiled, and didn’t mind the few premature grey hairs speckling though his sandy brown hair. His broad shoulders paired well with his tall, muscular frame, and there was something about the way he walked that made her weak in the knees. She loved him dearly; it pained her to think of him being unhappy.

* * *

The next morning after breakfast Mia went to see Remus in his office before departing for the train. The Hogwarts express left Hogsmeade to take students back to London at 2pm sharp, which allotted her a couple hours from now to get herself and her belongings there to head home. It was surreal that she was leaving Hogwarts for the last time, it almost felt like it was too soon. Her heart was heavy for Remus; she was feeling like he may be having a rough time with deciding to resign. She wanted to be there for him in any way she could. She got up to the big oak door to his office and knocked before sticking her head in.

“Hey.” She said softly, looking at him packing up some things from his office.

“Hey.” He said, giving her a somber smile. “I heard Sirius got away”

“Yeah, I hope he gets somewhere safe.” She said, picking at her fingernails anxiously. “I heard you resigned.”

“Parents won’t want someone like me teaching their kids” he said, looking back to the stack of books he was packing.

“Remus, how are we going to do this now? Should we come up with a schedule to see each other?” She asked, leaning against the armrest of the plush green couch that held so many memories from the last year.

“Mia…” Remus began, but froze before he could say the words.

“Mia… what?” She asked pointedly, picking up on his change of tone and body language.

“You deserve to be with someone your age, someone who is young, happy, and whole. I cannot give you the things you need.” He said as his eyes downcast.

“Yes you can, you’re what I need” She stood up straight, body tense from what he was beginning to say.

“I forgot my Wolfsbane potion. If that had happened when we were alone, I could kill you, or worse, turn you. People like me don’t find steady paid work; I wouldn’t be able to give you the life you deserve.”

Mia’s heart began pounding, feeling it in ears.

“Remus, I don’t care about those things. You won’t forget your Wolfsbane potion again, and if you do, I am an animagus now. As long as we are together, that’s the only life I need”

Tears were welling up in her eyes. Was he really ending things with her? She loved him, she needed him. She didn’t want life to go on without him.

“A life with me is not a happy one. I’m too old, too poor and too dangerous. One day you’ll see this is for the best” he said evenly, his eyes not daring to look her way.

“Remus, please, don’t shut me out. I love you.”

He didn’t answer. There was a silence that fell between them, Remus never looking up at her. His hands were clasped tightly in his lap, his stomach doing flip flops. Self-loathing washed over him as he realized he hated himself for what he was and letting her go, but he would hate himself more to condemn her to a life with him. Tears fell down her cheeks and her hands were squeezed into fists to keep them from shaking. Their silence was broken by Harry, who had stopped by to say goodbye to him.

“Oh, I’m sorry Professor was I interrupting?” he asked, looking at Remus then looking at Mia, puzzled by the tension in the room.

“No, Harry, I was just leaving” Mia said through gritted teeth.

She glared at Remus before walking out. Her stomach lurched from the anguish she was feeling, and she threw up in the trashcan at the edge of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. She took a deep breath and wiped her tears, and allowed herself to become numb, pushing all the emotion out of her head. It was too much for her to deal with, so she decided she wasn’t going to deal with her feelings at all. Getting back to the dormitory to grab her trunk, Penelope began to ask her what was wrong, but she immediately cut her off and stormed out. Penelope knew better than to ask again.

* * *

Getting on the Hogwarts express to head back home, Mia slumped in her cabin car seat across from Percy and Penny, putting her headphones and Walkman on. She stared out the window blankly, her mind racing around the thoughts of her conversation with Remus. Percy was whispering to Penelope inaudibly, looking at Mia but Penelope shook her head at him. She assumed Percy asked if she were ok, and Penelope was warning him to leave her alone. When Penelope is upset, she likes to talk her feelings out, but Mia was always the opposite. She would retreat into her own mind, and it usually made it worse to pester her about her feelings before she was ready to talk. Tears fell from her eyes again after a few minutes went by, and she cried silently, starting out the window, crying tears for the man she loved who pushed her away.

**Is this the end for our forbidden lovers? or will their love bring them back together?**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How is everyone liking this story so far? Please leave me a review! I love this fanfic and the arc that Mia's character will be taking in the future chapters. This story is far from over, and I hope you all enjoy it until the end!


	17. chapter 17

As Mia began her summer after Hogwarts, she fell into a depression. The first couple weeks at home with Susan were the worst. Mia spent most of her time crying in her room, and when Susan would try to talk to her about it Mia would shut down even more. Susan tried employing Penelope to figure out what was going on with her, but even her best friend couldn’t break through the wall. Mia and Penelope were scheduled to take their muggle equivalency exams just before Christmas, so they spent a lot of their free time studying and preparing for their tests. She had a hard time focusing some days, her mind wandering to Remus, but Penelope was patient with her and they took breaks frequently to reset her mind. Penelope didn’t push Mia to talk, but had informed Susan she believed her anguish to be from someone she was seeing during school, that ended right around graduation.

Mia spent the whole month of July in Florida with her father, but had a hard time enjoying the trip. She did ok during the day, as long as she kept busy with activities and her studies, but at night she cried herself to sleep, unable to shake the loneliness. Her nightmares had returned, plaguing her every few nights with memories of the night her father was tortured, and reliving Andrew’s attack. The vivid scene of him kicking her in the ribs and touching her made her skin crawl when she woke up.

She felt thrown away like trash, like the last year was all a lie and she was too blinded by love to see that she didn’t mean what she thought she did to him. Mia hated talking about her feelings, and her feelings about Remus and their breakup were not an exception. She refused to confide in Penelope, Susan or John, and became irritable and lashed out when pushed to talk about it. She had lost her appetite for the most part and had a hard time keeping food down, a habit she was known for when she was upset. Food felt like glass sliding down her throat, and the idea of eating made her sick to her stomach. She dropped nearly 20 pounds off her already trim frame in just a couple months, making her clothes baggier and her face look sunk in. While in Florida, John threatened to take her to have a feeding tube put in if she didn’t eat. He called Susan one day, begging for help.

“Suz, she won’t eat. She maybe eats 3 bites of oatmeal in the morning, I don’t know what to do.” John called one day, voice breaking over the phone.

After the threat of the feeding tube, Mia tried to eat a little more each day, but still was eating less than her parents would’ve liked. She would insist that she wasn’t hungry, and would start to choke and gag on bite of food if made to eat more than she wanted.

Susan had gotten her a graduation present, a tawny owl, which she named Lionel. It seemed like the only time Mia smiled was when caring for her owl, she had wanted one since she started at Hogwarts. At the end of the summer, The wizarding world was buzzing with news from the quidditch world cup being attacked by a group of death eaters, casting the dark mark above the campgrounds after they tortured a muggle family and burnt down many tents throughout the campsite, and of Hogwarts hosting the Tri-Wizard Tournament this year, but to a surprise, 4 champions were chosen instead of the typical 3. Harry Potter’s name had somehow ended up in the goblet, despite an age limit of 17 set by this ministry this year. Mia wasn’t sure if she believed the buzz that Harry put his name in, bad things always seemed to happen to that boy that he didn’t ask for. He would have to have been barking mad to put his name in the goblet at only 14.

* * *

Mia and Penelope had begun working at the Clearwater’s wine and cheese shop in downtown London, saving up to get their own flat for after they passed their equivalency exams. Susan had hooked up the Clearwater’s fireplace to the Floo Network so Mia could Floo there, and then walk the few blocks to the store with Penelope. Susan didn’t like Mia to apparate alone, paranoid that she would splinch herself even though she passed her apparition test the previous year just fine. Starting work seemed to help Mia’s day to day mood over the fall months, her crying at night and the nightmares started getting farther apart each week.

Coming home from work one day, Mia thought her mother would still be at work so she apparated into her living room, the small pop sound unmistakable to any wizard or witch. Susan had been working extra hours after the Quidditch world cup in Ireland was attacked by the death eaters, the Aurors working overtime to snuff out Voldemort’s supporters before anything can escalate.

“Mia, dear, why didn’t you take the Floo?” Susan came into the room, her voice slightly scolding.

_Busted_ Mia thought to herself, surprised her mother was home early.

“You are not that good at apparating yet, I know you think you are just because you passed that test but if you splinch yourself…”

“I’m ok, I swear” She giggled at her mother for a moment, until she realized that her mother’s eyes were red and puffy. “Mum… what’s wrong?” She asked, her face falling.

“Your father called this morning. You should call him. He originally asked to speak with you but you were at work.”

Mia walked over to the telephone and slowly dialed the country code and phone number. Her heartbeat was audible in her ears, what could her dad tell her that would make her so upset? As the phone rang, her anxiety began to build.

“Eglin Air base, how may I direct your call?” a monotone voice of a woman answered the phone.

“Lt Colonel John Roswell, please.” Mia said politely.

“And this is?” the monotone voice asked her.

“His daughter, Amelia.”

“Ok please hold”

After a moment of silence, a familiar voice appeared on the other end.

“Mia! Honey it’s good to hear from you. It’s quite lonely here without you. Tell me, did your mother tell you the great news?” John said with excitement in his voice.

“No, she didn’t, she just told me to call you. What’s up?”

Mia was confused. If it were good news, why was her mother so upset?

“I got the call from the General; they are stationing my whole unit overseas. They are sending us back to the UK, so I will be in London.” John said happily.

“Oh, Daddy that’s amazing!” Mia exclaimed.

She loved her father, and for the first time since she was a kid it would be nice to have him living in the same country.

“You bet kiddo. I should be there in time for Christmas, I’ll keep you posted. Are you eating ok?” John asked, his Midwestern American accent sounding almost twangy.

“Yes dad…” she groaned irritably.

“Alright sweetie, just make sure you keep it up. I gotta go, love you.”

After Mia hung up the phone, she walked into the other room where her mother was sitting on the couch, crying again.

“Mum, why are you so upset that Dad is coming back to the UK?”

“Because of the very reason I sent him to America in the first place!” she hissed, dabbing tears from her eyes. “There are whispers, Amelia. The death eaters are beginning to show activity again. It feels like the beginning again, like it did before. Your father is safer in America. He may not remember, but some of the death eaters that were around the first time, including the one who tortured him, do remember. We had a spy in the Order, Sirius Black, who fed them information that my husband was a muggle. He told them that Auror Susan Byrne married a muggle American and their daughter then was a half blood. Of course this was before be blew apart a street full of people.”

Susan dabbed at her eyes again. Mia tried not to scoff at the accusations Susan just said about Sirius, there was no way for Susan to know that it was indeed Peter Pettigrew who was the spy, and framed Sirius.

“I can’t believe he escaped ministry custody AGAIN, it’s made for so much paperwork.”

Mia sat on the couch and hugged her mother.

“I did what I had to do to protect my family. I sent the two of you to America because I thought it would be safer. I would’ve restored his memory if he hadn’t met Miranda, but I couldn’t shatter his happiness. I was the one who made it seem as we had a broken marriage. I just wanted to keep him safe. I love you and your father so much.”

Mia and Susan sat there for a good hour, hugging each other.

“Mum… I think we should restore Dad’s memories. I think it would help for him to know who we are. Maybe his position in the military can help.” Mia said gently.

“Absolutely not, the less he knows the better. He is less of a target if he doesn’t know. If someone uses Legilimency on him, they won’t find anything of value.” Susan snapped, standing up from the couch.

“This is for his protection. I forbid you to say anything to him, Amelia. I don’t want to have to charm him a 3rd time.”

Susan walked into the other room to return to her paperwork, and Mia rolled her eyes and started off towards her bedroom.

* * *

The night before Mia and Penelope’s equivalency exam, an unfamiliar owl tapped on Mia’s bedroom window. Mia opened the window and let the bird fly in, it landing next to where Lionel was perched. Lionel clicked his beak at it distastefully.

“Oh Lionel, be nice” She scolded her owl, removing the letter off the visitors leg.

She opened it and gasped. It was from Sirius.

> Mia,  
>  I hope this owl finds you well. I have travelled back in the country to keep close to Harry. I’m sure you heard about him getting chosen for the Tri-Wizard tournament, but he didn’t enter himself. There are whispers of Voldemort’s supporters starting up again, and I need to be closer to gather information. I am writing because I have sent Remus a couple owls with no reply, and was wondering if you could have him write me.  
>  Best,  
>  Sirius

Mia was thrilled to hear from Sirius, she hadn’t heard from him since he escaped but it concerned her that he was back in the country.

“He’s going to get himself thrown back in Azkaban” She muttered under her breath.

She was also concerned that Remus hadn’t been in contact him with him either. She pulled out a piece of parchment and her quill and wrote her reply.

> Sirius,  
>  It is so good to hear from you. I trust that you will keep yourself safe, especially being back north. I unfortunately cannot pass along your message to Remus. He ended things with me the day after you escaped, and I haven’t heard from him since leaving Hogwarts. I sent him an owl this past summer, with no reply as well. I miss you terribly.  
>  Love,  
>  Mia

She tied the letter to the unfamiliar owl’s leg, gave it a treat and sent it off out the window. Lionel snapped at her, but was happy when she gave him a treat as well. Mia looked at the clock reading 11:24, and hopped into bed. She needed to get a good night’s rest so she could ace this exam, but thoughts of Remus and Sirius kept her up tossing and turning. Why hadn’t he contacted Sirius? It made sense that he wouldn’t reply to Mia’s owl, but certainly there was no reason to ignore his friend.

* * *

Penelope and Mia received their test results from the exams 2 days after Christmas, both receiving excellent scores. Susan was very pleased with how Mia did, which was an immense weight lifted of her shoulders. Mia knew it was time to start thinking about her career path, but her future seemed so unclear without Remus. She had ambitions to follow in her mother’s footsteps to be an Auror, but she knew Susan wouldn’t want her to take such a dangerous job. It felt impossible to fight her mother on something like this without Remus’ support, so she was certain she may end up in a desk job in the Department of Magical Artifacts or something boring and safe. Regardless on her future’s uncertainty she and Penelope had jobs at the wine and cheese shop that paid pretty well, so they were on track to moving into their flat together. They were scheduled to sign the lease for their new flat the Thursday after the New Year, so when Mia received an unexpected owl from Penelope that Wednesday, she assumed it was to finalize plans for the next day and moving. She unrolled the parchment that she untied from Frankie, Penelope’s screech owl, and read:

> Mia,  
>  Percy broke up with me because he said he needed to focus on his career at the ministry, as I’m sure you heard that he took a permanent position. He mentioned is workload kept increasing ever since the attack at the quidditch world cup, and his boss, Mr. Crouch keeps piling more responsibility on him. I guess he has been ill and Percy’s had to do this job for him. His exact words, ‘I do not have time for you now’. He did it over owl, too! I can’t stop crying, I thought he was the one. I need you.  
>  Penelope

Mia sprung to her feet to run to the telephone. The Roswell’s kept a telephone at home in case John called, but it was handy when needing to communicate with Penelope or her parents, seeing as how the Clearwater’s were muggles. She wasn’t surprised that Percy took his job too seriously, but she was surprised that he would’ve dumped Penelope over it. She ran up to the telephone and called the Clearwater’s house, a faint voice on the other end picking up.

“Hello?” the small voice asked.

“Penny? It’s Mia. Are you alright?” she asked.

“Oh Mia!” Penelope wailed “you got my owl! Thanks for calling.”

Penelope burst into sobs on the phone, and Mia couldn’t understand a word of what she was saying next. She knew this emotion all too well, the memories of Remus breaking it off fresh in her memory.

“Penny, I can’t understand you. Take a deep breath” She said, but Penelope sobbed even harder.

“Do you want me to come over?” Mia asked after another minute of sobbing.

“YES!” Penelope wailed and hung up the phone.

Mia ran upstairs and threw a change of clothes, a few of her study guides, and some toiletries into her backpack. She came downstairs into their dining room, where Susan was sitting at the table, head buried in stacks of paperwork, looking stressed. The Aurors had had quite a bit of extra work after the events at the quidditch world cup this summer.

“Mum, is it ok if I go to Penny’s? I think I’m going to spend the night and just leave from there to sign our lease” she asked.

She couldn’t wait until tomorrow when she didn’t have to ask permission to go somewhere.

“Percy Weasley broke up with her, and she’s not ok.”

Susan looked up; she was very empathetic to this, as she watched Mia make herself sick over someone she still refused to talk to her mother about.

“Oh, that poor girl; Yes, Go, take care of your friend. Take the Floo, I don’t want you to get splinched”

Mia rolled her eyes as she walked over to the fireplace, pointed her wand at the logs, and said “Incendio”.

Orange flames erupted, and the fireplace had a nice crackling fire before her. She took a small handful of Floo powder from the pot next to the fireplace, and sprinkled it over the flames, watching them turn bright green. She stepped in, and said “The Clearwater Residence” and felt herself get pulled up the chimney, spinning around and around very quickly. Before she knew it, she landed in the fireplace at Penelope’s. She stepped out and brushed herself off.

“Penny?” she called, making her way through the living room to the stairs.

She began walking up the flight of stairs to Penelope’s bedroom, when she emerged at the top of the stairs.

“Mia! Did you apparate here?” she asked, still in her pajamas from the night before and hair in a bun on top of her head. She must’ve been lying around crying all day, as it was 3:30 in the afternoon and her eyes were very red and puffy.

“No, Floo. Mum still thinks I’ll splinch myself”. She hugged Penelope when she reached the top of the stairs, and they retreated into her bedroom.

The girls talked about Percy for almost an hour, Penelope telling her about how things seemed fine over the holiday, and then out of nowhere he just left her. Mia knew this feeling all too well. Even many months later she couldn’t bear to take off the jewelry he had gotten her for Christmas the previous year. Susan had asked her about the jewelry when she got home, but Mia snapped at her and ended the conversation quickly. Susan didn’t push it; her and Mia were the exact same when it came to dealing with grief and sadness. They both retreated into themselves, not ever wanting to talk about their feelings. Penelope, being the opposite, vented every thought she’s had since receiving Percy’s heartbreaking owl, crying on and off while speaking. Mia fidgeted with her necklace, feeling the texture of the prongs holding the garnet in place as she listened to her friend. After Penelope had cried until she couldn’t cry anymore, she changed the subject.

“Is this how you felt when your mystery boyfriend broke up with you?” she asked.

Mia’s eyes darted up to Penelope. Mia was sitting on the floor, leaned up against a white wood desk, while Penelope was on her bed, leaning against the wall it was pushed up against.

“You’ve been playing with that necklace for the last hour; something tells me that wasn’t a gift from your mother last Christmas.” She said, giving Mia a suspicious look.

Mia sighed and looked off in front of her. Penelope wanted it to be Mia’s turn to vent her feelings, which was not something she was in the mood for. Ever.

“Yes, you remember me crying myself to sleep every night before I left for Florida. I still do, some nights” she said softly.

“Mia, I know you said you couldn’t tell me, but now that it’s over, can you tell me who it was?” Penelope asked, moving from the bed onto the floor to sit closer to her.

Mia nodded, knowing the day would have come at some point where she was going to have to tell Penelope.

“His name was Remus.” She said, not looking at her.

“Remus, hmmmm I don’t think I know a Remus at school. What house was he?” Penelope looked puzzled.

“He was a Gryffindor” Mia said, gaze unchanged, her eyes still focused on a random fixed point in front of her.

It was true; he was a Gryffindor, just not at any time when they were in school.

“So he must have graduated then. But I don’t know anyone by the name of Remus that graduated with us in Gryffindor. Actually, the only person I know named Remus is Professor Lupin” she said, her face turning more puzzled as the thought.

Mia looked at Penelope and said nothing. After a moment, Penelope’s eyes bugged and she gasped.

“Mia, no… you can’t possibly mean…”

“Yes, Penny. Remus Lupin.” Mia sighed, she began feeling the sting of tears starting, but she took a deep breath and stifled down the feeling.

“Mia, he was our TEACHER.” Penelope said in disbelief.

“Trust me, I know. We didn’t mean for it to happen, it just kind of did. We loved each other. Well, I think he loved me. He said he did. Not sure now. I love him.”

“Did he break it off actually like you said, or did you when it came out that he was a werewolf?” Penelope wouldn’t take her eyes of Mia she was so surprised.  
“No, no, I knew what he was before Christmas, he broke it off with me, saying I deserved someone ‘young and whole’ or whatever bullshit.”

“SINCE CHRISTMAS? How long did this go on???” Penelope’s eyes were wild with disbelief; at least Mia had gotten her to forget about Percy for the time being.

“We’d been seeing each other since October” Mia said, beginning to pick her fingernails.

The girls were quiet for a few minutes, Penelope trying to make sense of what her friend had just told her.

“I tried to owl him this summer, but no reply” Mia said after the moments of silence. “I know he hasn’t been in contact with a mutual friend either, who’s tried to owl him twice with no reply. I wish I knew where he was living, so I could go there and confront him. I just want to know if he actually cared about me, or was just using me for his own entertainment.”

Mia had begun to think the worst about her last year at Hogwarts. She couldn’t help but feel like maybe Remus’ feelings for her weren’t true due to the way it ended. She needed confirmation, just to get closure.

“Mutual friend?” Penelope asked, looking confused.

“If I tell you who the mutual friend is, you have to swear you won’t repeat it to anyone, or call the ministry. I need you to promise.” Mia said sternly.

“Why would you think I would call the…” Penelope started, but Mia cut her off.

“PENNY! I need you to swear”

“Ok, ok, I swear” Penelope said hastily.

Mia took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second.

“Sirius Black.”

“SIRIUS BLACK? The murderer??” Penelope gaped at her, eyes wide with disbelief.

“Sirius is one of my best friends. He’s the friend I was meeting with last year. He’s innocent. He was framed.”

Penelope looked puzzled, but sat down on the bed and motioned for her to elaborate. Mia started at the beginning, telling her about how Remus, James, Peter and Sirius were friends at school, and how the events unfolded that landed Sirius in Azkaban, and Peter cozily in the family of the Weasleys.

“Mia, Scabbers was Percy’s rat first.” She said horrified.

Penelope was on information overload. She was feeling as if her mind was being flipped upside down. After a minute of Penelope processing everything she spoke.

“Well, do you think he can help you find him? Sirius, I mean” Penelope said evenly, her usual cool-headedness returning from the shock Mia had just given her.

“Maybe, I didn’t think to ask him before” Mia said, feeling stupid at the obvious solution.

She went over to Penelope’s desk and began scrawling on a piece of parchment.

> Sirius,  
>  I’ve got the bloody brilliant plan of going and confronting Remus, sarcasm intended. I need closure from what happened after graduation at the end of the school year, but I have no way of finding his cottage. Would you be able to tell me where I can find his cottage? I’ll ask him about not writing to you while I am there.  
>  Enjoy the pumpkin pastie.  
>  Love,  
>  Mia

She rolled up her parchment and grabbed a pumpkin pastie from Penelope’s dessert box she kept under her bed and wrapped them up in burlap. Frankie was clipping his beak in excitement to get to deliver mail. He was a very enthusiastic owl. She tied the parcel to his leg and gave him a treat, sending his out the window.

“And now we wait.” Mia said exhaling. She wished owl post could be instant results.

“Come on, let’s go watch a movie. Get our minds off these men.” Penelope grinned.

Mia smiled at her friend and they went downstairs. Mia didn’t watch movies much at home, Susan thinking muggle entertainment was boring, so Mia indulged in her favorite muggle things with her father, and with Penelope. The girls made a big bowl of popcorn, poured a couple glasses of wine, and put in a comedy to help lift their spirits. At least Penelope had stopped blubbering and seemed to be calming down from the emotional blow. Mia kept thinking of Sirius, hoping she would receive his owl in a timely fashion.


	18. chapter 18

The girl’s had been moved in to their flat for a couple weeks now when she received Sirius’ owl. She about trampled Frankie when he flew in the window; relieved that he came back with what looked like a reply. After she untied the parchment, he flew to the perch Penelope had set up for him in the living room next to Lionel, and seemed at home already.

> Mia,  
>  Yes, I can draw you a map to Remus’ cottage, just be careful of the moon cycles when you choose to go. Write me with an update after you see him and let me know if he is alright. I would go check on him myself, but I am laying low keeping an eye on Harry. The map is drawn at the bottom of this letter.  
>  Thanks for the pumpkin pastie, send food whenever you can.  
>  Sirius

“Penelope!!!!” Mia shouted, busting into Penelope’s bedroom as she was getting out of the shower.

“Geez, Mia, what??” Penelope said, covering herself with her towel quickly.

“I’ve got it; the map.” Mia said, her sentences frazzled from nerves.

“You want to go today?” Penelope asked, checking her closet for what to wear.

Mia stopped and tried to think of what part of the cycle they were in. She walked into the kitchen and looked at the calendar they had posted on the fridge. It told them the dates of the New and Full moons, and right on today was a full moon.

“No, not today” Mia hollered from the kitchen. “We need to wait about 4 days”.

Mia’s stomach did flip flops. The idea of confronting Remus was so real now; it made her sick to think about seeing him. But she needed to see him. Penelope walked out of her bedroom dressed, scrunching her wet curls with her towel.

“4 days? That’s rather specific.” She chuckled.

“Full moon today” Mia said, looking through the pantry to find some food to send off to Sirius as he had requested.

“Mia… it didn’t bother you that Professor Lupin is a werewolf?” Penelope asked slowly.

Mia had found some fruit snacks that she fit into a bag with some licorice wands, and was sending Lionel out the window.

“No, it honesty didn’t; doesn’t. I was shocked when I realized it, that’s when I passed out in Snape’s Defense against the Dark Arts lesson last year, but I quickly realized it didn’t change who he is. He is still Remus. Still the man I fell in love with.” Mia said; her voice full of emotion.

“Sirius helped me become an animagus so I could keep him company during full moons, so I’ve never really felt afraid of him anyway” she added casually, walking into her bedroom to take a shower.

“Wait, that’s the magic he was teaching you in the forest?? Hold on… You’re an animagus?????” Penelope called after her, but Mia was already in the shower.

Penelope sat down on the couch with a look of shock on her face, surprised to hear her friend had learned such complex magic in a short period of time, and also that she had failed to even bring it up over the last 8 months.

* * *

The girls picked a Friday evening to confront Remus. Mia and Penelope closed up the wine and cheese shop around 4pm, and let the other employees leave early so they could discuss their plan alone. Mia was fidgeting with her outfit in the mirror of the shop’s bathroom, questioning if she should’ve dressed nicer, or dressed more casual. She was wearing her favorite pair of blue jeans and a black sweater, and her hair had been smoothed straight. She was wearing the jewelry he had gotten her for Christmas the previous year, not having taken it off since he broke it off with her at the end of the school year. She questioned whether or not she should wear it; did it make her seem pathetic to have held on to it? Her thoughts were interrupted by Penelope bustling into the back room.

“Mia, you look great, we should get going.” She said, grabbing her shoulder bag from the coat rack next to the bathroom.

Mia nodded at her, and her heart started to pound. She looked at herself in the mirror again, her chest tightening from anxiety. Her stomach lurched as if missing the last step of a set of stairs. Penelope read her body language, and stepped into the cramped bathroom with her, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

“We don’t have to do this today…” Penelope started.

“No, I’m ok.” She said, taking a deep breath.

The girls exited the shop, locking the door, and made their way around the alley out of sight of any muggles. They went behind a dumpster, and pulled out Sirius’ map.

“Ok, if we apparate here in the village, we should be able to follow this map to his cottage.” Mia said, pointing at a spot on the drawing that Sirius had sketched for her.

The girls linked arms, feeling a tug just behind their navels before suddenly appearing in the little village that Sirius told them to start. They hiked for what seemed like forever, though a wooded area that bordered the village. Mia looked at her watch. 5:03.

“He could’ve warned us it was going to take this long on foot, or gave us a better apparition point.” Mia scoffed.

The map said to head southwest, and they would run right into it. She had a compass charm going on her wand, but she felt like they were walking southwest for longer than they should. About 10 minutes of walking later, they reached a clearing, with a small run-down cottage that had a beautiful lakeside view.

“Wow” Penelope breathed “it’s so peaceful here”.

Mia nodded and swallowed. She was about to face Remus, and she was shaking in her boots. Penelope grabbed Mia’s hand and nodded to her, smiling. Mia was envious of how calm Penelope was, but then again, she didn’t have the same emotional interest as her. They walked up to the door of the cottage and knocked 3 times, loudly. No answer. After a moment, they knocked again, met with the same silence as before.

“Maybe he’s not home?” Penelope whispered.

Mia was irritated at this point. She didn’t hike over an hour in the woods just to find a dead end.

She banged on the door “REMUS?! Open up!”

Mia tried the door handle, and it was open. She flung the door open and walked in before Penelope had the chance to protest. She gasped at the state of the inside of the cottage. There was probably 150 empty bottles of scotch lying around the living room and filling up the dining room table, the trash can piled so high it looked as if it was going to fall over, and Remus, snoozing in an armchair in the living room still clutching a half drank glass of scotch. The coffee table had takeout boxes littered across its surface, and there were cobwebs in the corner of the living room. Mia was surprised to see his place in such disarray; he was usually a very neat person but it appeared as if he let himself and his home go. She could tell the cottage itself needed some repair work anyway, Remus living off a tight budget most likely didn’t have the extra gold to spare some repairs, but it looked like he hadn’t picked up since he moved back in last summer. His stubble suggested he hadn’t had a good shave in at least a week, and his hair had quite a bit more gray than it did at the end of last school year. She walked over to him and shook him hard, Penelope looking around wide eyed, she too was surprised by the many bottles of scotch before her.

“Remus?? REMUS?? WAKE UP” She spat as she shook him awake.

He began to stir and groan and he adjusted in his chair, taking a moment to open his eyes. His eyes were bloodshot with dark circles under them, his face gaunt and his skin slightly sallow. When he saw the two girls standing before him, he blinked a few times in confusion before speaking.

“Mia?? Penelope??” he croaked; his voice dry and gravelly from just waking up.

“Hi, Professor…” Penelope said softly.

“Yes, us; Get up. I came to talk to you” Mia said curtly.

“What’re you…” he began to say sleepily, until Mia ripped the glass of scotch out of his hand and slammed it down on the messy coffee table.

“Hey, what the hell??” he said irritably.

“I think you’ve had enough for today. What the hell is this anyway??” Mia scoffed, throwing her hands up as if to point to the entire cottage. “Look how many bottles of scotch are around here. You seriously drank all this?”

He shrugged at her, his demeanor sobering up a little now that he was awake and she had his attention.

“I came here because I want to hear the words you are too cowardly to say. I send you an owl with no reply. Sirius even sent you two owls!” Mia exclaimed, a fire beginning to burn inside her.

Her nerves went from anxious to angry, and she was ready to have it out with him right here, right now.

“How did you find me…” he asked slowly, eyes moving back and forth between Mia and Penelope.

“Sirius, who is back in the country, by the way, and hasn’t heard from you.” She sneered. “I want to hear you say it, Remus. I want you to tell me why you broke it off.”

She put her hands on her hips and stared down at him with burning intensity. Penelope was beginning to feel uncomfortable; slinking herself against the wall of the cottage as if to blend in with her surroundings. He blinked at her a couple times, almost afraid to speak.

“Well???” Mia sneered, her eyes flickering at him dangerously.

“Mia, you deserve to be with someone better than me…” He began calmly, but Mia threw her hands up in the air and began to pace.

“Better than you?? That’s a cop out and you know it. Don’t feed me this bullshit.”

“I’m not; I cannot give you the life you should have. I will hold you back. I’m too old, too…”

“yeah yeah yeah too old, too poor, too dangerous. That’s BULLSHIT!”

Mia had picked up an empty bottle of scotch and threw it on the floor as she finished her last sentence. She ignored the shards of broken glass and continued to pace around them.

“I know you never loved me, you were just using me, some pretty little student who kept you company at your year of Hogwarts, but when the prospect of having an actual relationship came around you threw me away like a piece of trash!”

Mia had begun to cry, tears streaming down her face, voice breaking as she screamed at him in anguish.

“I want you to say it; I want to hear THAT YOU DON’T LOVE ME!”

Remus shot up out of the chair and growled in frustration. He ran his left hand through his graying hair, as he walked over to a window to look outside.

“DON’T YOU SEE?” He yelled, staring out the window. “I did it BECAUSE I love you!”

He turned back to her, his face turning red.

“A life with me is SHIT! I get passed up for paid jobs because of what I am. I go months without work, because no one wants to hire the lycanthrope. Even jobs I do get, once they pick up on my symptoms if I don’t resign, they fire me!”

Remus took a few steps towards her, his voice lowering to normal speaking volume.

“I live on a small stipend of what I’ve been able to save and what I inherited, and I can’t even afford to fix this place up still.”

His posture slumped as he ran his hand through his hair, taking a deep breath.

“I could accidently infect you if we are not careful, I could infect children we may have, and I will not condemn someone I love to live with this disease as I do. You are so young and beautiful; you have the world at your feet and I will hold you back. I want you to be happy, even if that means I am miserable, drinking myself to death in this cottage.”

Remus’ face was twisted with anguish, his emotional pain that he was drinking to numb coming to a head right in front of them. Mia took a deep breath.

“But don’t you see? I don’t care about what you are. None of those things concern me; all I want is you.”

“You will live life as an outcast, people constantly judging you for what I am.” He said gloomily.

“I don’t give a shit what people think.” She scoffed. “You won’t infect me because we will be careful. I became an Animagus FOR YOU, which we never got to talk about, but I did it so I can keep you company during the full moons, especially if we run out of Wolfsbane, which I know how to brew, by the way, because I learned it FOR YOU.”

Her voice was steadying as she spoke, her tone sounding much more logical and businesslike.

“You may have trouble finding work, but I won’t, because of my NEWT scores I can have any job I want, and I can support us both. I want this life because I want YOU. You make me whole, Remus. I don’t want to live without you. I can’t live without you.”

Remus and Mia stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, both silent. Penelope shifted uncomfortably in her spot she had pressed herself into against the wall.

“If you don’t want me, tell me and I will leave right now, and never bother you again” she said, her voice barely over a whisper.

“But if you want me, I am yours”

His mind was racing; He loved her, but he wanted what was best for her. He had made himself sick questioning if he had done the right thing, but now that she was here, he didn’t want her to go. He felt it was selfish to condemn her to life as on outcast in the wizarding world, but in this moment he wanted to be selfish. He felt dizzy from all the scotch he’d had, his mind spinning with uncertainty. He ran his hand through his hair again and took a deep breath. He gave into his emotions, and walked up to her, cupping her face with one hand and kissed her. He wrapped his other arm around her waist and pulled her close. Their kiss was passionate; Mia began trembling in his arms from the surge of emotions she felt to touch him again.

They kissed for a good minute until Penelope cleared her throat awkwardly, feeling uncomfortable by the snog session before her.

“Sorry Penny…” Mia said, giving her a sheepish smile.

She turned back to Remus, who was giving her a mournful gaze.

“I’m sorry, Mia” he said softly, looking into her eyes.

She could see the pain he was feeling in his eyes, his sorrow written all over his face.

She pressed her forehead against his and whispered “please don’t shut me out. Let me back in”.

He nodded, and she hugged him tightly, burying her face into his chest. After she broke her embrace, her mental armor went up, feeling uncomfortable with the emotional rollercoaster that she just went through in a matter of five minutes.

“Well this place is in complete shambles. You seriously lived like this?”

She walked over to the kitchen and began opening cupboards, finding only a few bags of chips and something moldy that was now unrecognizable. She crinkled her nose at it and threw the moldy mess on top of the overflowing trash can.

“Geez Remus, when was the last time you ate a decent meal either?”

“Maybe the last time you did…” Penelope said to her quietly.

Mia gave her a glare that made Penelope squirm uncomfortably. Penelope harped on Mia to eat just as much as her parents did, which drove her nuts to have three people constantly asking her what she ate last and how much. Mia ran her hand through her hair, turning her attention to the cottage rather than her eating habits.

“Penelope, if you could apparate to the village and pick up some food to make? Getting back shouldn’t be hard since you can apparate straight here now knowing where we are. Remus is going to go have a bath and shave because I believe it’s been a few days since that’s happened. I’m going to get this place cleaned up.”

Mia picked up an empty bottle and scoffed at it.

“This isn’t even good scotch. If you’re going to be a drunk, at least drink something decent.” She said as she shooed Remus towards the bathroom.

He muttered something about liking his scotch as he disappeared around the corner.

“What do you want me to buy?” Penelope asked nicely, treading lightly knowing she irritated Mia by her food comment.

“Coffee, for sure, and some earl grey tea, he likes that. Food wise something good to soak up the alcohol, pasta maybe? Anything really, whatever you think is best” Mia said, her thinking process frazzled as she was picking up bottle after bottle.

“Ok, I’ll be back shortly… you ok?” Penelope asked, placing her hand on Mia’s shoulder.

Mia looked up “yeah, I think I am.”

* * *

Mia hated dealing with her emotions, so focusing her energy on cleaning up the cottage was perfect. Penelope was back quicker than expected, and they made a big pot of coffee to help sober Remus up. Penelope kept Remus occupied while Mia made dinner, telling him how she had heard that Hogwarts was to host the Tri- Wizard Tournament this year, and that they were not playing qudditch due to the tournament’s festivities.

“Thankfully we graduated before the quidditch hiatus, can you image Oliver Wood being told that there wouldn’t be quidditch for an entire year?” Mia called from the kitchen.

The three of them laughed, sharing stories and memories of quidditch. Penelope was quite chatty with Remus over dinner, talking to him about her and Mia working at her parents shop, and their results on their equivalency exams. Remus had mostly sobered up by this point, carrying on conversation with her and asking her questions about the girls’ plans to get their own place and job prospects.

“I’m not sure if I will be working in the Wizarding world or Muggle world” Penelope said between bites. “My NEWT scores were good, not like Mia’s, but good if I wanted to work for the ministry in some way. My mum wants me to take over the shop as manager, and then sell it to me when they retire, but I’m not sure yet.”

No longer distracted by cleaning or barking orders, Mia began to feel her emotions returning to her. As she twirled her spaghetti around her fork for each bite, she was retreating further into her mind, and she slowly grew quieter at the table. Her plate was much smaller than theirs, but Penelope seemed so distracted with chatting with Remus it kept the attention off how much she ate. Her appetite was still low, and by her seventh bite of spaghetti her stomach was churning with distain.

When they had finished eating, Mia looked down at her watch. 9:13 she thought the time was flying by, but she had no idea it was this late. The sun was already down, and she wasn’t sure how late Penelope was interested in staying out.  
Mia began to clear the table, and Remus stood up to help her, but she shooed him away.

“I’ll get these dishes, something tells me you probably have a giant pile of dirty laundry that needs attending too”

He laughed and ran his hand through his hair.

“Yeah, I’ll go see to that” he said with a sheepish smile, and walked off towards the bedroom.

Penelope brought a few more dishes to the sink, and leaned in close to whisper in Mia’s ear.

“If you want to stay with him tonight, that’s ok” Penelope said in a hushed tone.

Mia stopped what she was doing to look at her.

“I don’t want to ditch you” she whispered.

“No, no, really its ok; I think you SHOULD stay. It’ll give you guys a chance to really talk, without me being here and eavesdropping” Penelope grinned “I want a full report in the morning”

Mia smiled at her friend “Thanks, Penny.”

She turned back to the tall heap of dishes next to her. As Penelope was walking towards the door, she called “uh Professor Lupin? It was good seeing you.”

Remus popped his head out of the bedroom. “Oh Penelope, are you two leaving?”

“Just me, Mia is staying back and working on some dishes. I just didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.” Penelope smiled.

“Sure. Also, you can call me Remus now if you like, since I am not your teacher anymore.” He said, but Penelope’s face twisted a little at this.

“Yeah, maybe…” she laughed. “Ok I’m leaving!” she called and a soft pop could be heard as she disapparated.

As Mia scrubbed the dishes, she more and more became overwhelmed by her emotions. She was happy to hear Remus tell her that he loved her, but she had originally came to get closure from the conversation before leaving Hogwarts. Even though he told her what she had wanted to hear, the wounds from her heartbreak still there. The emotions were boiling up to the surface, and she couldn’t stifle them down any longer. She stopped scrubbing, her tears fighting to break into violent sobs, and sunk to the floor and buried her face into her knees. She did her best to cry as quietly as she could, not wanting Remus to hear, but alas, he came into the kitchen to see her in a crumpled heap on the floor. He sat next to her, pulling her to rest her head in his lap while he stroked her hair and let her cry. He knew why she was crying, she was crying for him, so he sat there in silence and let her. After about 10 minutes, she had reduced to small sniffles, and sat back up. Before she could get the chance to speak, he cupped her face with his hand and kissed her softly. She began to tremble; he stroked her cheek gently before wrapping his arms around her and picked her up, carrying her to the bedroom.

She was much lighter than the last time he carried her. He noticed her weight change, but didn’t say anything. He laid her down on freshly changed white sheets and kissed her passionately, Mia wrapping her arms around him. She pulled his shirt off over his head, and he began unbuttoning her jeans. After a few minutes of snogging, they began to make love, slow and gentle. A few more stray tears fell down Mia’s cheek, Remus wiping them away as he gently kissed her forehead. When they had both climaxed, Mia cozied up next to him and laid her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. She felt so safe nestled in his arms. Both of them held each other, not saying a single word, and fell asleep.

* * *

Mia had a very restful night sleep, but woke just before sunrise. It was probably the best night sleep she had had in months. Remus, next to her, was still asleep, snoring softly. She silently snuck out of bed and pulled one of his button-down shirts out of the closet. She slipped it on and began tying her hair up in a messy bun as she walked into the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee. She took her cup and a fluffy throw blanket out onto the porch of the cottage to watch the sunrise. She sat on the steps of the porch, looking out onto the lake that’s shore was just a few paces out. The sunrise was coming out of the forest to the east, daylight just barely poking through the trees. The sight was absolutely breathtaking. Mia wondered how many sunrises Remus watched from this very spot. She cast a heating charm on the blanket, and it kept her nice and cozy in the crisp February air. She was alone to her thoughts for about a half hour, until she heard the door open behind her.

Remus came and sat with her on the step, cup of coffee in his hand also.

“Good morning” he said, taking a sip of the piping hot beverage.

“Morning” she said, looking at him with a small smile.

They were quiet for a few minutes, both of them taking in the view of the colorful sunrise before them.

“Mia…” he began.

“It’s ok, Remus.” She said softly, looking down into her now empty cup of coffee.

“No, it’s not. I thought letting you go would be the best thing. When I saw you at the graduation mixer, emotions were hot as I was recovering from the most unfortunate full moon, and you looked so beautiful, so vibrant and full of life talking with your fellow students and teachers. I hadn’t gotten a chance to congratulate you on your NEWTS, but they were most impressive, and with those scores you can get any job you want. And it reminded me that I can’t, because of what I am. I convinced myself that you don’t belong with someone like me, I didn’t deserve you and that you would be better off without me.”

She took his hand, and gazed at him intently.

“You being here last night, showed me that I shouldn’t’ve pushed you away. You had become the light in my life.” He continued; his facial expression bleak. “And without you, everything was dark. You being here gives me a reason to live for.”

“You have yourself to live for to” she said, still looking at him, but he did not return her gaze.

“There were many nights, more than I can say than not, that I wished I was dead rather than be what I am.”

They remained quiet for a moment, but Mia linked her arm around his and rested her head on his shoulder. She knew he hated his condition, but hearing such dark words was disheartening.

“You look thin.” He said finally.

She sighed a heavy sigh, “my appetite hasn’t been what it was” she said, beginning to pick at her fingernails.

He remained quiet, knowing it was probably his fault she hadn’t been eating much. He tilted her chin up and kissed her. They pressed their foreheads together for a moment before Mia settled her head on his shoulder. They sat there for another minute, until Remus broke the silence again.

“Now, when on earth did you become an Animagus without me knowing?”


	19. chapter 19

Remus and Mia spent a good chunk of their morning talking on the porch as the sun rose. She told him all about her lessons with Sirius to learn the animagus transfiguration. He was most impressed by this, as it took Sirius, James and Peter 3 years to learn it, but Mia did it in less than 3 months.

“You are an extraordinary witch, Mia. I hope you realize this.” He had said, making her blush.

They ate left over pasta for breakfast, Remus insisting she eat a large helping. She actually felt hungrier that morning than what had been normal, so she had no problem consuming the giant pile of noodles in front of her. After they cleaned up, she gathered her things to apparate home.

“When can I see you again?” Mia asked, kissing him goodbye.

“What are you doing next weekend?” he asked, wrapping his arms around her.

“I’m working Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday this week, but I can see if I can switch shifts to Friday to get the weekend off?” she said.

“That will work, I’d love for you to stay the weekend if you’d like. Send me an owl with what you can do about your work schedule” He kissed her again before she stepped away.

“Oh, and can you send Sirius an owl? He needs to hear from you.” She said.

“Yes, I’ll do that” he said, running his hand through his hair, realizing he now had to explain himself to Sirius.

Mia blew him a kiss, and then apparated, disappearing with a small pop.

* * *

Tuesday rolled around and Mia could hardly focus on selling fancy cheeses to rich muggles. Charlotte, Penelope’s mother agreed to switch Mia’s Saturday shift to Friday, and was very excited to be able to spend the weekend with Remus. Penelope was thrilled to hear that Mia would be heading back to the cottage, agreeing to cover for her in case her mother or father called.

It was a pleasant day at work; Penelope was stocking a shelf of newly imported white wines while Mia ran the cash register and cheese case, counting the ungodly amount of fancy cheeses that Mia could barely pronounce. She had recounted blocks of feta cheese 3 times when the front doorbell chimed, as an unexpected customer walked in. Mia looked up and found to her surprise, Remus standing in the front of the shop. He was dressed in nicer shape clothes than he usually wore, it looks as if his jeans and shirt were new, and his hair had been freshly cut. Mia thought he looked so handsome in muggle clothing, and just as she was about to say hello, Penelope noticed him when she stuck her head around the wine shelf.

“Oh hey professor, or uh…” she had started to stumble on what to call him when Charlotte came out of the back carrying another box of bottles.

“Hello Sir! What can we help you with today?” Charlotte began.

“Mum, this is Professor Lupin, from my defense against the dark arts class last year.” Penelope said, and Charlotte lit up.

“Oh yes, Penelope told us all about you, Professor! She said you were one of her favorite teachers, especially after years of inadequate instructors. Please, please, what can I get you?”

“Pleasure to meet you” Remus said kindly, his blue eyes sparkling at the comment that he was a student’s favorite.

Remus missed teaching tremendously, it had been his favorite job he’d ever had.

“I’m looking for a good wine to pair with steak. What would you suggest?”

Charlotte led him over to the red wines, giving him a vast array of choices to choose from.

“You’ll have to excuse me, Mrs. Clearwater…” he said as Charlotte cut him off.

“Charlotte, please” she said, beaming and eager to assist Penelope’s favorite teacher.

“…Charlotte. I’m not much of a wine connoisseur; I tend to be more of a scotch man myself. Mia, which one is your favorite?”

He turned to smile at Mia behind the register.

“uhm, the 1979 merlot from Napa Valley is excellent. It’s my favorite from that shelf.” She said, her eyes moving to Penelope as she was giving Mia a grin.

Remus grinned at her and then turned back to the wine shelf.

“I’ll take that one then please” He said to Charlotte, who happily wrapped up the bottle and insisted on giving him some cheese samples to go with the wine.

Mia rung him up without saying much, but the sexual tension between them was thick. Charlotte had tottered off to the back, completely oblivious to it, but Penelope was grinning so wide Mia knew the second Remus left she was going to get blasted with questions. Mia could smell a new cologne on him, the scent was intoxicating. Mia believed that Remus had never been so handsome compared to this moment right here. As she slid him his change on the counter, he placed him hand over hers, making her skin feel as if a jolt of electricity ran through her.

“I’ll see you this Friday night?” he asked in a whisper, barely audible.

All Mia could do is nod; she was so weak in the knees from his intense gaze. She wanted nothing more than for him to take her on the cheese counter right here and now. He winked at her and took his change and turned to walk out. He gave a friendly nod at Penelope, and exited the store and strolled around the corner. Mia let out a big breath she was holding, and Penelope ran up to her.

“Oh my gosh I can’t believe he came in here, that wine is SO for this weekend, do you know what his plans are??” she whispered excitedly, grabbing Mia’s hands.

“Steak apparently” Mia giggled, her stomach in butterflies from excitement. She wasn’t sure why seeing him had made her so weak in the knees, but regardless, couldn’t wait to see what he had in store for her this weekend.

* * *

It was Friday afternoon and Mia closed up the wine shop around 4pm. Remus had sent her an owl the day before asking how she liked her steak cooked, and instructed her to wear something nice. She looked in the mirror of the bathroom of the shop, fussing with her red dress she chose to wear. It was classy, something you would wear to a dinner party, but had a deep v neck that showed off her cleavage nicely. It hung looser than she would like it to around her waist and hips, making her sigh as she looked in the mirror. She really hadn’t paid much attention to her body the past 8 months, however looking at a dress that used to be fitted nicely now hang off her, it was apparent she had lost quite a bit of weight. She had her hair pulled up into a high ponytail, which accentuated her neck well. She fingered her necklace that he gave her as she took a deep breath, butterflies in her stomach over the excitement of seeing him. She grabbed her bag she packed for the weekend and locked up the shop, heading around the corner into the alley to apparate behind the cover of the dumpster. She closed her eyes and felt the uncomfortable tug behind her navel, and pop, she was in front of Remus’ cottage.

She shook off the after feeling of apparating, and walked up to the door and knocked before opening it, shocked to see how nice and tidy the cottage looked. The cottage was still in its ramshackle state, but it looked as if Remus had scrubbed it from top to bottom. There was about 100 candles lit all around, and everything looked like it was in its rightful place. Remus was standing in the living room with a glass of scotch in his hand, dressed in a very handsome suit. She could smell the same new cologne that he was wearing the other day in the shop.

“Wow” she breathed, looking around and at him. “You clean up nice.”

He smiled at her and held out his arm and escorted her into the dining room, pulling out her chair for her. He kissed her cheek as she sat down, making her blush. The table was set already with a vase of roses in the middle, the 1979 Merlot bottle just in front of that. Mia felt a pang of guilt, the suit, the candles, wine, steak; it must’ve all costed a fortune. He had said on multiple occasions he wanted to be able to give her nice things, but she didn’t want him to spend so much when he wasn’t working.

“All this for just for me staying the weekend?” she smiled, pouring herself a glass of wine while Remus was fixing her plate.

“Well, I figured we needed to eat something.” He chuckled, bringing their plates over and sitting next to her.

“Remus, this must’ve costed…” She started but he waved his hand to dismiss her.

“I hadn’t bought any new clothes in 5 years, I was able to afford a few new things.” he said, pouring himself a glass of wine. “I cleaned out gutters for the butcher shop owner in exchange for the steaks, and the wine, well, that I did splurge on.”

She chuckled, relaxing in her chair slightly.

He gave her a small smile “you look beautiful”

She blushed, but was caught off guard when she looked at his plate and saw a piece of basically raw meat, lightly seared on the outside.

“I think you took your steak off too soon” she said crinkling her nose, cutting into hers and feeling relief when she saw it was a perfect medium.

“I like my steaks on the rare side” he said, watching her face twist in disgust.

“That’s bloody disgusting” she snorted, and they both laughed.

“It’s a wolf thing” he shrugged.

 

Dinner was excellent to Mia’s surprise. She didn’t expect Remus to be that good of a cook, enjoying her food so much she overate to the point of being uncomfortable. This was the first meal in months that didn’t make her sick a few bites into it.

“Where did you learn to cook like that?” she asked.

“I worked as a cook in a few pub kitchens. Working in the kitchen at a little wizard pub in Bristol was my longest running job right after James died. I worked there for 18 months until I couldn’t trade shifts one full moon, so I had to quit. To date that was the longest I was able to hold a position”

Remus’s face fell as he spoke. Mia was quiet for a moment, unsure of what to say.

“Well, dinner was delicious. Thank you.” She said after a moment of silence.

He stood up to take their plates and kissed her on the cheek.

“You want to go for a walk? The lake is pretty at sunset” he called from the kitchen.

“Yes, I need to walk off all this food I ate before we can do anything else” she giggled, walking up behind him and wrapping her arms around him.

He took her hand and led her out the front door that overlooked the bank. She slipped her heels off and walked barefoot long the edge of the lake, holding hands and making casual conversation. It was unseasonably warm this day, the temperature feeling like spring time when it was only the middle of February.

“My dad is stationed in the UK now.” She said, stopping to look across the lake. “My mum is freaking out about it. She says there are whispers that Voldemort is gaining strength, especially after what happened at the quidditch world cup”

“Your mother is probably worried because of what happened when you were little.” Remus said, taking her hand. “Are you happy he will be close?”

“Yeah, I mean, I love my dad. It sucks being half way around the world from him. I know he is probably lonely with Miranda being gone; it’s been almost 5 years since she passed and he’s was alone in Florida since then. Work keeps him busy, but I know it’s hard.”

“You don’t talk about your stepmother much. Did you like her?” Remus asked, taking a seat on the embankment.

Mia sat next to him, and linked her arm with his and rested her head against his shoulder.

“Yes, she was great. When dad worked Miranda used to take me all sorts of places. She took me shopping; she took me to the zoo. I think my mum got jealous sometimes because Miranda always got to be the fun parent.”

Mia felt a lump form in her throat from the memories she shared with her step mother. She normally didn’t talk much about Miranda because she always got emotional; she had grown to love her in the 6 years she had been in Mia’s life, despite being half way around the world. Normally Mia would’ve quit talking when feeling her emotions rise to the surface, but today she actually wanted to keep talking.

“I told her, you know. About being a witch.”

Remus looked at her and raised his brow. “And what did she say?” he asked.

Mia chuckled and wiped a stray tear. “I told her all about Hogwarts and what I was learning when she was in hospice. It was just a day before she fell unconscious. Her eyes lit up when I told her everything, but she told me it was a wonderful story, and it made her feel better to hear my imagination so active.”

“Muggles” he muttered, flashing a smile at her.

She laughed; she knew how ridiculous their world sounded at times.

“As for whispers, I have heard the same thing. I believe Voldemort is trying to restore himself to his former glory. Many do not want to admit that this could be possible again, but I fear it’s headed there.” Remus said, changing the subject. “But, he won’t rise to power in the next few hours, so how about we head back to the cottage and I can show you what else I planned for this evening”

He shot her a devilish grin, and she picked up on what he was suggesting. She winked at him and stood up.

“I’ll race you back. Loser does dishes!” she snickered and took off running towards the cottage.

They ran back, Mia teasing Remus about how slow he was, and that he couldn’t catch her. She was almost up to the cottage when her foot caught a stray branch, tripping her. She scraped up her knees and elbows as she caught herself, rolling on the ground and howling with laughter.

“Are you alright??” he panted as he caught up with her, watching her laughing as her knees and elbows bled.

“I’m fine!” she choked through her cackling.

Her side was cramping from laughing, and Remus couldn’t help but start laughing himself. He took his wand out and healed her scrapes, the both of them trying to get ahold of themselves. When their laughter had reduced, Remus helped her up and she brushed her dress off.

“You shouldn’t’ve helped me up” she said with a sly grin.

“Why not?” he said, giving her a confused look.

“Because, you lose!” she squealed, and bolted towards the door and flung herself into the cottage.

Remus stood there snickering, smiling wider than he had in months. _Fuck, I love her._

* * *

Mia woke the next morning to the smell of bacon and eggs. She rolled over to see that Remus was already out of bed. Mia was amazed how sound she slept next to him; she hadn’t slept that well in years. She slipped on Remus’ button down shirt and walked to the kitchen. He was standing over the stove, finishing cooking when he turned around and saw her.

“There you are, sleepy head” he chuckled, smiling at her. “I hope you’re hungry.”

After breakfast, Remus had stepped away to use the loo and Mia started the dishes. She got lost in her thoughts so that when she felt Remus’ arms wrap around her she jumped a little. She turned around to face him, slapping him on the arm playfully.

“Don’t scare me like that!” she cried, giggling.

He kissed her then got down on his knees and began going down on her. Mia inhaled sharply at his touch, caught off guard. The sensation made her weak at the knees, barely able to hold herself up as he pleasured her. His tongue was so soft and quick, driving her mad. Her orgasm built up slowly, and she felt like she hung on the edge of her climax for a good minute that when she finally released, the tension was so much that she nearly screamed. Remus stood up and smiled at her, she was leaning on him to keep herself up her legs were so weak from the pleasure. He picked her up, placing her on the counter and running his hands along her thighs. He kissed her neck and whispered in her ear.

“Sounds like you enjoyed that” he said in a low gravelly voice.

Mia nodded, she was breathing heavily, still having aftershocks from her orgasm. His hand slid up her shirt and cupped her breast, his thumb running across her nipple. It instantly turned her on again; she began to kiss him, her tongue circling around his as his other thumb was mirroring the first one. She let out a soft moan as their lips pressed together, tangling her hands in his hair. She broke the kiss, pressing her forehead against his.

“Remus, fuck me” she begged, feeling herself soaking wet with desire.

“Not yet” he whispered, his hand running up her inner thigh.

She parted her legs and felt him slip a couple fingers inside her. She threw her head back in pleasure, his thumb circling her clit and fingers hitting the spot that made her shake like when he fingered her for the first time in his office. Mia felt her whole body tense as her muscles clamped down on his fingers, gasping his name as she came again. She was in complete bliss, unable to move or speak from the intensity of her second orgasm. Remus kissed her neck, letting her rest for a minute until he picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. He set her down on the bed and fluffed the pillows. He climbed on top of her and kissed her, her hand moving down to his erection that was begging to spring free from his boxers. She began stroking him; he slid his boxers hastily off to give her better access. After a minute, he grabbed himself and pushed into her. He gazed into her hazel eyes as he made love to her, watching the gold flecks dance in the reflection of light coming in through the window. Mia slid her hands up his back and dug her nails into his shoulder blades as she felt the pressure building between her legs. She bit her lip and writhed under him as she came for the 3rd time that morning; He joined her in release just a moment later, giving her a seductive smile as he pulled out and lay next to her.

“I didn’t think this could get any better” she said, breathing heavily.

They both chuckled and he pulled her close.

“I love you Remus Lupin” she said, nuzzling her head into his shoulder.

“I love you too, Amelia Roswell” he whispered in her ear, and kissed her forehead.

“Forever?” she asked as she looked at him with big, glassy eyes.

He took a breath and smiled at her. Her being in his life had been the best thing that had ever happened to him. He loved her, and he never wanted to let her go.

“Forever and always” he said, kissing her gently.


	20. chapter 20

After their weekend together, Remus and Mia became almost inseparable. Remus spent a ton of time in London with the girls, heading around town with them and spending a few nights at their flat here and there. Penelope had been really great about Remus staying over, and she would even come to the cottage on the weekends and kayak on the lake with them. Mia had returned back to her normal healthy weight, her appetite ramping back up. Remus still refused to let her around during the full moons, saying she should spend those nights with Penelope, or visit with her family. Mia thought it was because he was so ashamed of his illness that it was easier to be alone. She tried not to push it, she knew one of these days she would spend the cycle with him.

Penelope was promoted to manager at the wine and cheese shop, which made Mia feel like they were back at school and Penelope was the Prefect. She knew Penelope was most likely going to take over the business from her parents, but Mia actually would’ve liked the position of manager as well. If she couldn’t make it as an Auror, at least working with wine and cheese was more interesting in whatever bookish desk job her mother would want her to take. The three of them had been following the Tri-Wizard tournament intently, and were concerned when the champion wasn’t announced the following day after the tournament ended. Three days after the tournament ended, Mia and Penelope read the Daily Prophet and Witch Weekly cover to cover, unsuccessfully. Remus had even owled Sirius with no response.

* * *

Mia had decided to spend that weekend with Remus, and was cooking lunch for the two of them when she heard the door creak open; a shaggy black dog trotting in.

“Sirius!!” She cried, as he transformed back into a man.

Remus had been outside getting the kayaks together when he had seen the black dog enter the cottage.

“I thought that was you, Padfoot” he said walking back in, a smile on his face.

He and Sirius exchanged a firm handshake that led into a hug. Mia then threw her arms around Sirius and hugged him tightly. He looked awful. His hair was matted, he smelled of wet dog, and looked as if it had been a month since he had a bath. Mia could feel how thin he was from malnourishment when she hugged him.

“Mia, my dear you are as beautiful as ever” Sirius said, cupping her cheek and smiling at her. “Is that food I smell? Are you cooking?” he said eagerly.

“Mia is making lunch before we went kayaking on the lake” Remus said.

“I’ll set the table for three” Mia winked at Sirius. “It’ll still be about 15 minutes. Why don’t you go take a bath while you wait…?” She said, and the two men laughed.

She chuckled to herself as Sirius shuffled off to the bathroom. Remus looked so happy to see his friend again, Mia watched as he returned outside to finish preparing the kayaks, a smile on his face so wide the corners of his mouth reached his ears.

 

As they ate lunch, Sirius filled Mia and Remus in on the results of the tri-wizard tournament. Mia had tears rolling down her face as Sirius told them about Voldemort’s return and Harry’s experience in the graveyard. She couldn’t believe that Cedric was killed as a result; he was a nice guy and had so much to offer the world. Remus looked sick hearing the news. Sirius didn’t look much better, his face twisting as he told the events of that night as Harry told him.

“Dumbledore sent me here, told me to lie low with you if that’s alright.” Sirius asked. “He said he’ll be in touch with instructions.”

Remus nodded, “we can skip kayaking today…” he began, but Sirius cut him off.

“No, no don’t stop your plans for me. I’ll just make myself at home. I could use a nap anyway.” He said, waving his hand to dismiss Remus’ offer.

“You could come kayaking with us?” Mia asked.

“Er- no, I can’t” Sirius said, looking down at his plate. “I can’t be out in the open”

Mia had opened her mouth to speak, but Remus spoke quicker.

“No matter, Sirius, make yourself at home. Mia, let’s get ready to go” Remus interjected, wanting to keep her from pressing Sirius.

She nodded and they began cleaning up the table. Sirius plopped down on the couch to nap, and Mia and Remus exited the cottage to grab their kayaks.

They paddled out to the middle of the lake, the water calm and clear, the only ripples coming from their paddles.

“Does this mean the Order is back?” she asked, turning her head to speak to Remus who was just behind her.

He stopped paddling and looked at her.

“Most likely, I’m sure Dumbledore is formulating a plan to go about this.” He said evenly.

“I want to join.” She said.

Remus inhaled a deep breath, thinking of how to respond.

“This Order is a very dangerous group to be a part of; people can get hurt. This is an ugly battle to fight.” He said calmly, now looking off at the lake, staring at the horizon.

“I’m aware. But I want to make a difference. I want to fight Voldemort.” She said determined.

Still looking off in the horizon, he paused for a moment before speaking again.

“It is your choice to join if you like. I won’t stop you.” He said in the same calm voice as before.

“My mother probably will.” She spat, which broke his gaze from the lake and made him chuckle.

“Yeah, probably” he said “I have no doubt you would be a valuable member to the order, I just want you to stay safe.” He turned his head to her and looked into her eyes. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

His voice broke slightly as he said this, and Mia’s expression softened.

“My defensive and offensive spells are excellent. I had a good teacher”. She smirked at him, making him chuckle again. “We will keep each other safe, Remus.”

He smiled at her and nodded. He knew she had every right to join the order as much as he did, but it gave him a sick feeling in his stomach to think about her in harm’s way. He knew how ugly things could get with Voldemort, and he was worried that she wasn’t aware of just how bad.

* * *

Mia apparated home that night to tell Penelope the news of the Tri-Wizard tournament, and relayed what Sirius had told her about Voldemort’s return. Penelope was visibly shaken at the news, as muggles and muggle-borns were very hated by purist wizards like Voldemort.

“I don’t know what this means for us” Penelope whispered.

“I don’t know” Mia replied quietly.

It was a very unsettling thing to hear, that the darkest wizard of all time was back, and supposedly stronger than ever.

“Will you be alright if I stay with Remus for a bit? I’ll of course still be working, and I’ll apparate home every now and then for the evening. You could even stay with us if you like?”

Mia didn’t want it to seem like she was abandoning Penelope, but she also wanted to stay close to Remus and Sirius for information. According to Sirius, the Ministry was going to do whatever they could to keep quiet about Voldemort’s return, so the Daily Prophet would be useless for information.

“No, no I’ll be ok here. Maybe I’ll come for a weekend here and there. I want to stay close to mum and dad just in case.” Penelope said. “Really, it’s ok. Go. Stay with him.”

Penelope smiled at her, making Mia feel more at ease.

“Thanks, Penny. I’m going to pack and apparate back.” Mia said, walking to her bedroom.

She grabbed her old school trunk, and began throwing what seemed like the entire contents of her closet. She wheeled it out of her room, and Lionel snipped his beak at her curiously.

“Lionel, were going away for a bit. Fly to Remus’ house, I’ll meet you there.” She said to the owl.

He hooted and flew out the window without protest. She grabbed her suitcase with one hand and Lionel’s cage in another.

“I’ll pop back in a few days, owl if you need anything” she said.

“Mia, don’t forget you’re working tomorrow evening.” Penelope said, looking at the calendar they had posted on the fridge.

“Shit, yeah, thanks I forgot. I’ll be there.” She said, and with a pop she was gone.

* * *

Mia and her trunk of things appeared in the middle of Remus’s living room.

“Moving in, Kitten?” a voice said from behind her.

Sirius and Remus were sitting on the couch with glasses of scotch, Sirius grinning from his joke about the size of her trunk.

“It’s just some clothes” she rolled her eyes at him.

She set Lionel’s cage on the side table close to the window.

“Lionel is flying here; keep the window open for him.” She said rolling her trunk back into the bedroom.

“Bossy, that one is” Sirius whispered to Remus, making him choke on his scotch from laughing at the same time as taking a sip.

* * *

Mia could tell that the news of Voldemort’s return was weighing heavily on Penelope. She almost regretted telling her, but she knew that she had the right to know, just as the rest of the wizarding world did. Cornelius Fudge, Minister of Magic, was being quite the coward. Penelope was short-fused and irritable at work, and was burying her head in her manager duties to try to keep her mind off of it. Mia didn’t press her much on how she was feeling, as it was written all over her.

“Come to the cottage this weekend” Mia suggested. “It’ll be fun. You can meet Sirius.”

Penelope sighed. “I don’t know… I have some inventory I can do here at the shop.”

“I’ll just be like old times, plus a new friend” Mia winked, but Penelope’s grim face unchanged.

“Penny, I know it’s scary he’s back. But that doesn’t mean our entire lives have to change. Come on, come party with a convict and a werewolf” Mia smirked.

Penelope smiled weakly. “Fine, I’ll come Saturday night. I’ll bring vodka”.

Mia grinned back at her. She hoped maybe a fun weekend would help lift all their spirits.

* * *

That Saturday, Mia was in a frenzy making appetizers and snacks for Penelope to come over. She figured making it feel like a party would be more enjoyable than cooking a regular dinner. Remus and Sirius had been working out in the shed, sending letters to former Order members that Dumbledore had asked Sirius to contact. The men walked in, and looked puzzled at the spread Mia was putting out.

“I thought it was just Penelope coming over??” Remus asked, eyes scanning the various appetizers, snacks and desserts.

“It is, but I figured we needed to eat something, might as well have options” she said cheerily, bobbing around the kitchen.

Sirius and Remus eyed each other, and Sirius spoke.

“I don’t even know this girl. Are you sure we can trust her?” he said, a hint of fear creeping into his voice.

“Yes” answered both Remus and Mia at the same time.

Mia stopped for a moment and turned to Sirius.

“I would never bring someone around that I didn’t trust would keep your secret. Penny is my best friend, she’s loyal, level headed, intelligent…. Pretty” Mia winked at Sirius mentioning that Penelope was pretty.

A grin spread on his face, and this time Remus rolled his eyes at him.

“Mia, don’t get him started” he chuckled, slapping a hand on Sirius’ shoulder.

He then walked over to the tray of sugar quills that Mia laid out, taking one off the top and biting in.

“Remus! Out! This food isn’t ready yet!” Mia shooed him out of the kitchen. “Both of you, go wash up. Penny will be here soon. Sirius, brush your hair, you look like a matted dog” she ordered.

“I told you, bossy!” Sirius hissed in a whisper to Remus, a little too loudly.

Mia turned and gave the men a glare, one that eerily resembled her mother’s glare when the men were at Hogwarts and were caught by Susan out of bed. Both of them quickly shuffled off at this, leaving Mia in the kitchen snickering to herself.

 

The soft pop was unmistakable when Penelope arrived at the cottage. She walked up to the cottage and knocked on the door as she was coming in. She was having a hard time shuffling through the door with the sack of bottles she was carrying.

“Penny!!” Mia cried, brushing her crummy hands off on her jeans. “I’m just finishing setting the food out, come in, come in”.

Penelope gaped at the food spread that Mia had prepared.

“How many people are coming…” she asked “I only brought two bottles of Vodka”

Mia giggled “that’ll be plenty; I picked up scotch and tequila already too. It’s just four of us; I went a little overboard on food.”

“A little?” Remus asked with a smirk, walking into the room. “Good to see you, Penelope” he said, giving her a friendly hug.

Sirius walked in the room, his eyes flickered at Penelope. She looked very pretty this evening, her curls fell into neat ringlets, and her top she chose to wear had an open back that was very flattering on her figure.

“This one mine?” Sirius said quietly to Remus.

Mia heard him and slapped his arm playfully. “Sirius, this is my best friend, Penelope Clearwater. Penny, this is Sirius Black.”

Sirius bent down on one knee in front of Penelope and took her hand, kissing the back of it as if he was meeting the queen.

“Pleasure to make your acquaintance, milady” he said in a low, gravelly voice.

He smirked at her, his eyes flashing with avidity. Penelope blushed scarlet all the way to her ears, making Mia roll her eyes at them as she walked into the kitchen.

“Come eat, foods ready” she called.

Penelope shuffled after her quickly, and Sirius grinned at Remus, which was returned with a half disapproving stare.

“Behave.” he whispered fiercely.

Sirius winked at him, sauntering off towards the kitchen. Remus noticed the two large bottles of vodka that Penelope had left on the end table. He took a deep breath, and chuckled to himself, just a touch worried what Mia was getting them into tonight.


	21. chapter 21

The party was going off without a hitch. Sirius was the life of the party, they taught him to play some muggle card games like poker and spades; turns out he was quite good at them. Drinks were flowing, friends were laughing, and the tension of Voldemort’s return seemed to be put on pause for the night. They all sat around the dinner table for their card games, Mia kicking Sirius in the shin every time he made eyes at Penelope. They had music playing on the Wizard Wireless Network, and Sirius proved to be a very good dancer. Sirius danced with Penelope to some Irish jigs, while Mia and Remus packed away some of the food in the kitchen before everyone was too drunk to do it later.

“You know what’s curious?” Mia said to Remus, turning to look at Penelope and Sirius laughing and dancing in the other room.

“Hmm?” Remus hummed, packing the candy into plastic bags and vacuum sealing them with a sealing charm.

“He is so handsome, even after all those years in Azkaban. Most look like walking death after they get out.” Mia said.

She felt Remus’ energy change at what she said, an annoyed expression plastered on his face.

“Yeah, he was always the handsome one in the group. Girls fawned after him, guys wanted to be him. He got more tail our 6th year than I think Peter and I combined in our time at school. He always got the girl” Remus muttered quietly, still not looking up from his vacuum sealing.

“Hey…” Mia said, cupping his face with her hand. He looked at her, his blue eyes looked gray in the dim light of the kitchen.

“He didn’t get every girl.” She smiled at him.

His eyes flickered at her as he grabbed her waist and pulled her close, kissing her firmly. They began to snog in the kitchen, but were broken up by Sirius’ deep voice.

“Oi, get a room!” he called, laughing.

Mia giggled and broke her embrace with Remus, but only to begin pouring shots for the 4 of them.

“Let’s kick this party up a notch!” Mia yelled, downing her shot.

The other 3 downed theirs after, only to have it refilled quickly by Mia’s quick pour.

* * *

Another hour into the party and Penelope, Sirius, and Mia were very intoxicated. Remus had a slight buzz, but was trying to stay sober to keep an eye on everyone. The girls were sitting on the couch, drinking straight from a bottle, laughing and making jokes as Sirius and Remus were playing gobstones on the floor. Sirius had just won the game, and stood up whooping and cheering.

“In your face Moony!!” he laughed maniacally, stumbling off down the hallway. “I’ve got to leak” he called, and the bathroom door slammed shut.

Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head as he packaged up the gobstone set.

“Mia…” Penelope whispered. “Sirius is… amazing”

She was slurring her speech slightly, and was very giggly.

“Yeah? You think?” Mia giggled back.

She looked at her friend and could tell that she wanted to say something but didn’t know how to word it.

“Penny, if you want to fuck Sirius, fuck Sirius.” Mia said; her voice clear and sober.

For a second you couldn’t tell how much she had to drink that night. Mia seemed so matter of fact, making Penelope giggle and hide her face behind her arm.

“He wouldn’t want to…” she said softly.

“Oh, yes trust me. He would.” Mia snorted.

Sirius had begun to stumble back to the living room as Mia got up and poured everyone more shots. Sirius flopped on the couch, stretching his wingspan across the couch. Mia stumbled over and sat in his lap, wrapping her arms around him after she handed him his shot. Remus watched her out of the corner of his eye, remaining silent, but his grasp on his shot glass was making his knuckles turn white. Mia leaned in close and whispered in Sirius’s ear, a huge grin spread across his face. He and Mia took their shots quickly, and she jumped up to pour herself another one.

He turned and looked at Penelope grinning “well, come here kitten, I don’t bite. Unless you’d be into that…”

Penelope giggled and moved toward Sirius, straddling his lap and they began to snog furiously.

“Oi, who needs a room now??” Mia hollered loudly at them, taking her shot.

Penelope broke into a giggle fit as they got up on the couch, Sirius taking her hand to lead her to the second bedroom.

“Want to join us, love?” Sirius asked Mia, winking.

“Watch it, Padfoot” Remus said smirking, but there was a hint of irritation in his voice.

Sirius was too drunk to pick up on this, so he just grinned and kept walking, the bedroom door slamming behind them.

“Take it easy, Remus, he’s just kidding” Mia slurred, grabbing the bottle on the end table and taking a big swig.

“Maybe that’s enough for tonight…” He said softly, taking the bottle from her hands and setting it back down. Mia looked up at him and wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him.

They began to snog when suddenly Mia jerked away and turned, vomiting all over the floor. She had a hard time standing up after that, her knees feeling weak and her head starting to spin. Remus carried her to the bathroom and set her next to the toilet, where she began to get sick again. He disappeared for a moment, she heard his voice say “scourgify!” in the other room, and then returned to Mia’s side, stroking her back and holding her hair out of her face. Penelope and Sirius were just across the hall, doing what sounded like something phenomenal. Mia broke out in sobs hearing her friend cry out in pleasure.

“Why are you crying?” he whispered.

“Because they sound like their having fun and I’m not!” she cried, slurring and blubbering.

Remus couldn’t help but chuckle as he watched Mia drunk, ugly cry with her head pressed against the toilet seat, but his mood was turning sour quicker than her stomach.

“What, you wanted to join them?” He asked, the note of irritation returning to his voice.

Mia looked at him with her glassy eyes “no, I wanted to with…” she began, but couldn’t finish because she started heaving again.

She was sick for about a half hour, and then fell asleep with her head still resting on the toilet. Remus picked her up and carried her to bed, curling up next to her, but couldn’t shake the irritation he was feeling.

* * *

Mia woke the next morning with her head pounding and her mouth feeling drier than ever. She rolled over to stand up, feeling a little woozy taking her first steps. Remus was still asleep, so she tiptoed out of the bedroom and made her way to the kitchen and living room, where she was greeted with the giant mess that was their party last night. She groaned as she made her way to the coffee pot, and began brewing a very large quantity. Glancing at the clock, the time read 7:09. The last time she checked the clock last night was around 1:15, but she knew she was up much later than that the night before. She heard a door open, and Penelope came tip toeing out of the second bedroom.

“Penny!” Mia hissed in a whisper.

Penelope came into the kitchen, dressed in her clothes from the night before and looking just as rough as Mia did.

“Hey, I’m apparating home. Thanks for having me last night” Penelope smiled at her.

“How was your night?” Mia asked, giving her a sly grin.

Penelope giggled “it was amazing… he is… well, he’s something.”

“Sounded like it” Mia snorted, stifling back a loud laugh.

“I left him a note, he’s still sleeping, but I wanted to keep it casual and be gone before he got up”

“Penelope Clearwater, casual??” Mia asked in half disbelief.

Penelope grinned and shrugged. “Send me an owl later.” She said, and with a pop she was gone.

“Was that Penelope leaving?” Remus asked, emerging into the living room.

“Yeah, she wanted to keep it casual and leave before Sirius got up” Mia chuckled.

Remus was looking around at the state of his cottage. “Damn, you all must’ve had fun last night” he said softly, overwhelmed by the view.

“This still isn’t as bad as when I found you nearly drowning yourself in scotch” Mia taunted, as she began picking up some of the trash lying around.

“Hey, that’s not true…” Remus began to protest.

They both spent an hour tidying up the cottage before they got a chance to pour a cup of coffee. Mia felt a slight coldness coming from Remus, unsure if he was just hungover, or if she had upset him with her scotch joke. Most of the second half of the night was fuzzy for her; only bring able to recall bits and pieces.

“How do you feel?” he asked.

“Like I got hit by a train” Mia snorted, taking a sip of her coffee. “How about you?”

“Oh, fine” Remus said cooly.

Mia’s face twisted and she was about to ask what was wrong, but was interrupted by Sirius blundering into the living room.

“Damn my head is pounding” he said loudly, rubbing his hands over his face. “Slippery little minx, your friend is. She snuck out on me this morning, all she left was a note. S, thanks for last night. P. she kissed the parchment though, nice touch”

Sirius walked over to Mia and gave her good morning hug, both of them kissing each other on the cheek. He walked over to Remus and showed him a pair of lacy blue panties he had shoved in his pocket with a devilish grin on his face.

“At least she left me a souvenir”.

Remus snorted at the sight of Penelope’s panties with disgust. Sirius clasped his hand on Remus’s shoulder and chuckled before he walked into the kitchen to pour himself a cup of coffee.

“What’s wrong with you, Moony? Missed some action last night?” he said with a playful tone. “See, kitten, you should’ve taken my offer, you missed a good time.”

Sirius winked at Mia, and Remus slammed his coffee down on the side table of the couch angrily.

“Remus!” Mia cried in surprise, looking at him bewildered by his current attitude.

“Easy, Moony, I’m just teasing” Sirius chuckled, but Remus glared at him.

“I think you need to learn your place here, Padfoot…” Remus began, but Mia cut him off swiftly.

“It’s not like that…” she started, the look of bewilderment increased in her expression.

“Oh, you love the attention! You feed into it! Had I not been here last night you probably would’ve gone off and joined them! Sitting on his lap, kissing his cheek, I’m surprised it hasn’t happened already.” Remus glared at Mia angrily, which she returned with a burning stare. “It’s no wonder Andrew Flint thought you were into him. Did you tutor him in more than herbology??”

“HOW DARE YOU!” she shouted, the accusations causing her blood to start boiling. The incident with Andrew the year prior was still a touchy subject for her.

“Remus, I would never touch her. I wouldn’t do that to you” Sirius said, raising his hands to try to calm the situation.

“Oh, you mean like Julia Butterworth in 5th year?” Remus snarled at him.

Sirius sighed “I told you, I didn’t know you were pining for her. I would’ve never if I had known, come on Moony that was years ago. We were kids”

Remus scoffed, getting up to take his coffee cup into the kitchen. He began doing dishes, clanking rather loudly in indignation.

“WHAT ON EARTH HAS GOTTEN INTO YOU?” Mia yelled at him, fighting back the hot tears that were trying to force their way out of her eyes.

Remus didn’t answer, but Sirius said to her quietly. “Tonight is the full moon, his aggression is up.”

Sirius seemed so calm in this situation, Mia figured he must’ve dealt with this behavior many times over.

“Well, I don’t care if there are 4 full moons in a row” she hollered, blood still boiling. “You will not speak to us like this. We didn’t do anything to deserve this; you will do well to mind your temper!”

She was gripping her cup of coffee so tightly that if she squeezed any tighter, it might shatter.

“Oh, you’re going to come to my cottage and tell me how to behave? I don’t seem to recall asking you to practically move in like you own the place!” he hollered back, slamming the dishes in the sink and turning to look at her.

The anger in his eyes was almost scary; Mia had never seen him this worked up before. He was usually such a calm, collected person, and Mia instantly felt unwelcome at the cottage. She didn’t think it was an issue her staying here for an extended period of time. Remus never asked her to, but he never protested either. She thought he was happy she was there. Mia stood glaring at him, her hands clenched into tight fists and she was shaking from anger.

“Why don’t I just leave you two, since obviously you both are denying whatever the hell has been brewing between you; You’re probably aching to get a moment alone to shag” He spat.

“Remus, there is nothing going on between me and Sirius!” She screamed, but it was no use.

He shot her one last angry glare, and apparated out of sight. Mia was a rush of many emotions; anger, confusion, hurt and anguish were flowing through her.

“Sirius, where do you think he’s gone?” she asked in a small voice.

“I don’t know” he whispered, the behavior he experienced from Remus tonight was one of the worst outbursts he’s witnessed.

The tears starting flowing now down Mia’s cheeks. She turned quickly and made her way to the bedroom, needing a moment alone. She walked into the bedroom and gasped.

“SIRIUS!” she screamed through her sobs.

Sirius came running in to find her sitting on the bed, sobbing uncontrollably, holding a small vial of bright blue liquid in her hand.

“He didn’t drink his potion.”


	22. chapter 22

Mia sobbed for what seemed like an eternity. Sirius tried to make her breakfast, but she refused to eat it. Along with the full vial of Wolfsbane potion, Remus’ wand sat on the bedside table.

“Sirius, he’s unarmed. What if something happens to him?” she had said through her sobs.

After a few hours, Mia had gotten a shower and cleaned up, and decided to write to Penelope. She and Sirius were going to search the forest around the cottage for him tonight, and Mia needed her to cover for her at work. There would be no way she could focus on selling wine and cheese when Remus was missing.

> Penelope,
> 
> Sirius certainly enjoyed your company last night, thanks for coming. Remus and I had a fight this morning and he disapparated from the cottage. It’s a full moon, and he didn’t drink his potion or take his wand. We are going to search the forest for him once the moon hits, but I need to stay here for when he gets back. Please, cover for me at work. I will owe you big time.
> 
> Mia

Mia rolled up the parchment and tied it to Lionel’s leg, sending him out the window. She prayed to herself that they would find Remus ok, and that once the full moon passed he would be back to himself.

Mia and Sirius ran through the forest as the shaggy black dog and white wolf for most of the night with no sight of Remus. They returned back to the cottage, Mia in tears again after she transformed back into herself. She feared the worst, and felt so guilty. She had never meant for it to look like she was flirting with Sirius, she wasn’t interested in Sirius like that. Sure, he was a very handsome and charismatic wizard, but Remus was the one she loved. She had been smitten with Remus since the moment she laid eyes on him, and he was the only one she wanted. She thought he wanted her there with him at the cottage; he had never given her the impression otherwise until that morning.

* * *

It was the two longest days of Mia’s life before she heard the door open to the cottage. Mia had maybe gotten 5 hours of sleep total in the few days that Remus had been missing, and had only eaten a few crackers here and there because Sirius practically force fed them to her. She and Sirius walked into the living room to see Remus standing before them, his robes nearly ripped to shreds, cuts all over his arms and he was limping, his left leg appearing to be broken. Mia began to cry at the sight of him, overwhelmed by relief that he was alive, but still angry at him for leaving the few days before.

“Mia, I am so sorry…” Remus began, his eyes looking sorrowful.

He knew he messed up, and regret was written all over his face. Mia walked up to him and backhanded him hard across the face. She then wrapped her arms around him, sobbing into his chest. He wrapped one arm around her, and the other came up to rub his cheek that stung from her slap. His eyes looked up to Sirius, giving him an apologetic look. Sirius nodded his head, and spoke.

“Mia, Remus is injured, let’s sit him down and take a look” Sirius said calmly.

Mia broke her embrace, wiping her tears furiously as Sirius helped Remus onto the couch. She hated showing her feelings, and the relief that Remus was back was overcame with the feeling of anger for him leaving in the first place.

“These scratches from you?” Sirius asked, looking at the state of his arms.

Remus nodded weakly, wincing as Sirius poked a particularly deep gash.

“There’s silver and dittany powder under the sink, Mia, if you could…”

Sirius turned his head to look at Mia, who already had the jar of powder and a glass of water in her hand. She handed the glass to Remus, and began powdering his gashes silently, stray tears still slipping down her cheek. She focused her energy on tending to his injuries, not looking up at him. She pointed her wand at his leg, “Episky!” she said, and his leg made a snapping noise, returning to its normal appearance.

Remus yelped as his leg snapped back together, Mia’s demeanor unchanging at his discomfort. She handed him a sleeping draught and a pain potion.

“Drink these, you need rest.” She said, still not looking at him.

“Mia…” he began to speak, but she cut him off.

“Drink, Remus” she said evenly, walking the silver and dittany powder back to the kitchen sink.

Sirius gave him a nod, and he sighed heavily. He knew she was upset and trying to pry at this point would be useless. He downed the pain potion and sleeping draught, and fell asleep 30 seconds later.

Mia walked back to the bedroom, grabbing a few pillows and a blanket.

“Are you ok?” Sirius asked softly, as she walked back into the living room.

“Yeah” she replied shortly, propping the pillows behind Remus and covering him with a blanket.

She turned to Sirius. “I’ll be back in a couple hours”. Mia took a few steps in to the middle of the room, and with a soft crack, she was gone.

* * *

Mia appeared in the living room of her and Penelope’s flat, which was sparkling clean as if Penelope had hired a team of house elves to scrub the place down. It felt sterile, foreign, not the same as she had left it before.

“Mia?” Penelope called from her bathroom, just getting out of the shower.

Mia made her way into Penelope’s bedroom, sitting on her bed.

“Yeah, I’m here” she said evenly.

Penelope walked out of the bathroom in her robe and hair wrapped up in a towel. She hurried over to Mia and hugged her tightly.

“Is everything ok? Did you find Remus?” she asked, hopping up on the bed to sit with her.

“Yeah, he came back this morning; He’s asleep now.” Mia replied evenly.

She relayed the events of the last couple days to Penelope, feeling numb to the emotional roller coaster she had experienced.

“Mia, I’m so sorry…” Penelope didn’t know what to say, she was at a loss for how to handle the situation.

“It’s ok Penny, it’s not your fault. I might be coming back home though, since he seemed very unhappy to have me there.” Mia said scornfully.

“I don’t think that’s it, I think his emotions were high and he said things he didn’t mean.” Penelope said, her typical cool as a cucumber tone was soothing to Mia today. “You know I’m going to tell you to talk to him when he wakes up.”

Mia rolled her eyes and chuckled. “Yeah, but you are always right about that.”

“I am? WOW can we please record this moment so we can refer to it next time?” Penelope joked, Mia hitting her with a pillow playfully.

“You need to call both your mum and dad. Susan called three times and John called twice. I can’t cover for you forever” Penelope laughed.

Mia sighed, she wasn’t in the mood to talk to either parent, but she knew she would have to call to avoid them showing up and seeing most of her closet and things missing.

 

Mia spent over an hour talking with both John and Susan. John wanted Mia to come and spend a weekend on base at the end of the summer with him, and wanted to plan something on the calendar. She agreed to spend her birthday weekend with him, as he hadn’t been able to celebrate a birthday with her on time since she was 7, and they planned a dinner date in the next week in London. Mia was fielding questions from Susan as to what she’s been up to, work, and her plans for the next couple weeks. Mia had a very hard time coming up with reasons as to why she hadn’t called her mum, but she seemed to have come up with a story decent enough to settle her. She looked at the clock and saw she’d been gone from the cottage for 3 ½ hours, and knew she was going to have to return soon. Her hunger came back full-fledged, so she made her and Penelope sandwiches for lunch.

“When are you planning on returning to work?” Penelope asked between bites.

“I’m not sure, can I owl you tonight? Either that or tell you in person if I have to come back home.” Mia picked at the crust of her sandwich, her stomach beginning to do flip flops.

“Sure. But remember I’m covering to mum too, it’s going to get harder and harder to keep our mums from talking.” Penelope said.

Mia nodded, “I need to get back.”

She got up and walked to the middle of the living room, preparing to apparate.

“Thanks Penny” Mia smiled, and disapparated.

* * *

Mia appeared in the living room of the cottage, Sirius asleep in the chair next to the couch, Remus still sleeping where she had left him the few hours before. She did her best to remain quiet, not wanting to wake the men. She spent an hour taking care of some laundry and packing her suitcase, in case she needed to make a haste exit. Once she was finished, she went outside to sit by the lake, taking a few copies of Witch Weekly with her.

Remus woke up and groaned from the ache in his leg. There was another pain potion next to the couch for him to take when he woke, and he greedily downed it. Within 15 seconds the pain in his leg diminished to a dull ache, and he was able to stand. His scratches had sealed up already thanks to the silver and dittany powder, leaving fresh pink scars to match the older whiter scars around them. 

He stumbled off the bathroom quietly, trying not to wake Sirius. He got into the shower and let the hot water run over him, shame from his actions returning to him as he remembered the things he said to Sirius and Mia. He wasn’t sure why he had gotten so angry, he knew Mia and Sirius would never betray him like that, but the mix of alcohol and his heightened aggression made him think the worst in both of them, projecting his own insecurities on them. Sirius had always been quite the flirt, but after he slept with Remus’ crush, unbeknownst to Sirius that Remus liked her, their friendship was nearly strained for good. James and Peter knew how much Remus liked Julia Butterworth, but Sirius hadn’t known that when he was bragging to his friends one morning about the ‘hot blonde hufflepuff’ he shagged in 2nd floor girls’ bathroom. Sirius felt terrible, and promised Remus it would never happen again. Sirius was fiercely loyal, and always intended on making good on his promise.

He was worried Mia would never forgive him this time for what he said. He liked having her in the cottage; he had no idea why he spouted off making it seem like he didn’t want her there. Now that he knew what life was like to have her back, he couldn’t imagine losing her.

After he showered, Remus walked into the bedroom to change into fresh robes. He saw Mia’s suitcase on the bed, packed up as if she was getting ready to leave. He felt a pang of remorse again; he didn’t want her to leave. He changed quickly and walked out of the bedroom to look for her, nowhere to be seen in the cottage. He poked his head outside, and spotted her sitting on the bank of the lake, reading a magazine. Remus looked back at Sirius, who was still sound asleep, snoring away in the chair. He exited the cottage, and walked towards her.

“May I sit with you?” he asked softly when he reached her.

She shrugged, not looking up from her copy of Witch Weekly.

He plopped down next to her, silent for a moment, unsure of where to begin. She broke the silence for him.

“so where were you?” she asked flatly, eyes still fixed on the pages of the magazine.

“I went to the Leaky Cauldron and drank for most of the day, but then when the sun set I retreated in the woods on the outskirts of town, realizing I forgot my potion. There was no one around thankfully, but I ended up scratching myself pretty good. Not sure how I broke my leg though, I think I tripped and landed on it wrong.” Remus explained.

“What took you so long to get back?” she asked.

“I was too weak to apparate, and I realized I didn’t have my wand so I couldn’t fix my leg. I rested in the woods until I could get back to the cottage without splinching myself”.

Mia took a deep breath and set her magazine down, finally looking at him. His eyes looked tired, his face weary from an exhausting few days.

“Do you realize how worried we were about you?” she asked, scarily calm.

Remus broke her gaze and looked down.

“I’m so sorry, Mia, you have no idea” he said softly.

She scoffed at him, feeling the tears begin to sting the corners of her eyes, but she stifled down the urge to cry.

“I’ll get my things and return to London tonight. I didn’t realize I was such an intruder here anyway.” She said evenly, forcing her voice to remain calm.

“No, please, don’t go. I didn’t mean what I said, I don’t know why I said that.” He pleaded.

Her expression softened slightly, but she still fought down the lump in her throat that was trying to escape with the tears.

“Part of you has to feel that way if it came out.” Mia said, beginning to pick her fingernails.

“I don’t though; I don’t know what came over me. My moods can get worse if I haven’t taken my potion. I let a slight bit of jealousy overwhelm me” he said, hunching his shoulders.

“I would never sleep with Sirius. I know we seem extra friendly, but I swear to you all we are is friends.”

“I know.” He whispered

“And how dare you say that I led Andrew on; you might as well have told me I am a whore” Mia hissed, her anger all of a sudden rushing back to her.

“NO, no, Mia I don’t think that of you, you’re right, what I said was completely out of line.” Remus started backpedaling, knowing he was never going to redeem himself for that comment.

He truly hadn’t meant it; he said it in the heat of the moment to be vindictive, his aggression taking over his better judgement.  
Remus was expecting Mia to begin yelling at him, but she sat in silence, her chin quivering as she fought back the sting in her eyes.

“Mia, I said some very terrible things, because I was jealous and hurting and I wanted to cause you and Sirius hurt too. It wasn’t right, and I am deeply ashamed of the way I behaved. I don’t know why I even entertained the idea that the two of you were going behind my back in the first place. I guess I just forget sometimes that someone can love me despite what I am.”

“And you will do well to remember it!” She hissed, unable to fight the few tears that escaped her eyes at this point. “I love you Remus. I don’t know why that is so hard for you to understand.”

She finally broke down into sobs, and he pulled her into his lap and cradled her.

“I love you, forever and always” she choked through her sobs.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry” he whispered, holding her and nuzzling her forehead with his cheek.

A few stray tears of his own slid down his face. He hated being the one who hurt her _again_ , and he vowed to himself he would be a better man, and never cause her this much anguish again.


	23. chapter 23

Mia and Remus walked back into the cottage to find Sirius awake. He and Remus greeted each other awkwardly, the tension of needing to talk about the argument a few nights before thick in the air. 

“Remus, I think I am going to go home for a few days” Mia said, breaking the awkward silence. 

“No, Mia, really, please stay…” He began, taking her hand. 

“It’s ok; I think it’ll be good. I need to get back to work anyway, Penny has been telling her mum I’m ill and I can’t be ill forever.” Mia smiled at him reassuringly. “Is it alright if I come back Friday?” 

“You come back whenever you like. You are always welcome.” He said, gently squeezing her hand. 

She gave him a small smile and a quick kiss before turning her attention to Sirius. 

“Take care of him for me?” she asked. 

Sirius gave her a large grin. 

“Sure thing, kitten” he said, winking at her. 

Mia said goodbye and walked into the bedroom to get her suitcase, the familiar pop of apparition told the men she was gone. 

“I guess we need to talk about the other night” Remus began, looking shameful.

Sirius sat on the edge of the armchair and exhaled. 

“Look, Moony, I have always been a jokester” Sirius started “but I swear to you, I would never betray your trust. Do I think your girlfriend is hot? Absolutely, you got yourself a keeper right there; fantastic tits on that one.”

Sirius realized quickly he was not starting off the conversation well, shaking off his last comment and continuing.

“But would I shag her? Absolutely not; I care about you and our friendship too much to jeopardize that. Now, her friend Penelope? I’d do her again in a heartbeat… damn that was a good night…” Sirius trailed off, grinning.

Remus laughed as he sunk down onto the couch. 

“Anyway” Sirius coughed, realizing he was getting off topic for the second time. “I know I said this 1000 times back then, but had I known you were interested in Julia Butterworth I would’ve never shagged her, either. I felt terrible. I vowed to you then that would never happen again and I have made good on that promise. I swear.” 

Remus nodded, looking at the floor. “I screwed up, Padfoot. I’m sorry I accused you of going after her. I was a real git.” 

“Yeah, you were” Sirius snorted, and both men laughed. “You’re lucky she loves you. She was a wreck after you left. I practically had to force feed her crackers because she wouldn’t eat; couldn’t sleep either, kept waking up in a panic.” 

Remus’s face fell; she hadn’t mentioned that she had nightmares while he was gone. He wished he could take those away from her, take away her pain. 

Remus’ voice broke as he spoke. Sirius put his hand on Remus’ shoulder. 

“We all screw up, Moony, but it’s how we correct our mistakes that matters” Sirius said, his eyes twinkling at him.

Remus smiled weakly and nodded. 

“Now, I’m starving, and since Mia’s gone we have to fend for ourselves for dinner. You’re the better cook, so…” Sirius grinned, Remus rolled his eyes. 

“12 years in Azkaban and you’d think you’d be interested in cooking your own food” he chuckled, walking to the kitchen to scour the cabinets for something to make.

* * *

Remus missed Mia terribly over the next week. She had sent Lionel with a letter letting him know that she was back to work and all was well there, but that she wouldn’t be back at the cottage until the following Wednesday, as she was picking up extra shifts to cover her absence, and made dinner plans with her Dad one evening as well. Things got quite boring around the cottage, Sirius was mostly stuck inside so they couldn’t go out on the lake or travel into town, and they were still awaiting instructions from Dumbledore on what was happening with the Order. At night, the bed felt empty. He missed the sound of her breathing when she was asleep, how cute she looked when she was curled up in the blankets, hugging her pillow. She was usually awake before him, letting him wake up to the smell of fresh coffee. He missed sipping tea with her on the edge of the bank mid-day, missed the way her nose crinkled just before he made her laugh, or how the gold flecks in her hazel eyes sparkled in the light of the sunset on their evening walks. He just plain missed _her_.

When Wednesday rolled around, he woke up extra early from excitement. He put on some of his best casual clothes that he usually reserved for going around muggle London, and tidied up the cottage. He didn’t realize how much of a slob Sirius was until Mia wasn’t there to pick up after him. She had sent Lionel with another letter the day before, letting him know that she would be arriving around lunchtime. Remus had made some stew, which made Sirius come sniffing around the corner eagerly. Just as Remus was telling him paws off until Mia arrived, the familiar pop sounded from around the corner. 

“Ah, Mia, my dear!” Sirius called, sweeping her into a big hug. 

Remus smiled, looking at her as if it was the first time he laid eyes on such a beautiful woman. She almost glowed she looked so radiant standing before him. 

“Miss me?” she asked coyly. 

“Miss you?? He’s been beside himself since you left. Been cleaning and doing too much work meant for a house elf” Sirius said jovially, walking over to Remus and slapping him on the shoulder. “Now can we eat?? I’m starved over here…” 

Sirius began clanking around in the cabinet for a bowl while Remus pulled Mia close to him and kissed her softly, running his hand up into her hair. His cologne was intoxicating to her; she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him harder in the middle of the kitchen. They stopped when they heard Sirius call 

“Oi! You two can do that after we eat!” 

They chuckled, pressing their foreheads together. 

“I missed you” he whispered, tucking her hair around her ear. 

As they released their embrace, they joined Sirius at the table. He met Mia with a devilish grin. 

“So… Mia… how is Penelope?”

* * *

The next morning when Remus woke up, he was surprised to see Mia sound asleep next to him. She most of the time was awake before him, the smell of coffee always filling his nostrils first thing. She looked so peaceful, but he couldn’t help smiling at her light snore that he found adorable. He slipped out of bed quietly, sneaking into the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee. He left it steeping to go and wake Mia, who was already sitting up when he returned to the bedroom. 

“Morning” he said smiling “coffee is steeping” 

Mia stretched her arms and yawned.

“Great, thanks” she said sleepily as he crawled back into bed with her. 

She laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes, relaxing as he gently stroked her back. 

“I missed having you here” he whispered to her. 

“You said that last night” she giggled, shifting her head on his chest to look at him. 

He pulled her up so he could kiss her. 

“I love you, Mia. Forever and always” he said, looking into her eyes. 

Before she got the chance to answer he kissed her again, this time deeper and more passionate. They spent a minute or two kissing before Mia’s hand found her way to his growing bulge. She slipped her hand down his boxers and began to stroke him. He let out a low growl as he kissed her, his one hand tangling in her hair while the other slid under her tank top to cup her breast. He sat up, grabbing the hem of her tank top and pulling it over her head. She followed suit, pulling his shirt off and running her hands on his bare chest. He was very muscular, which wasn’t as easy to see when he was wearing a shirt, and Mia now barely noticed the many scars across his chest, as well as the bite scar on his shoulder. He lay on his back as she kicked off her pajama shorts, and positioned herself over his cock and let herself sink down. She moaned as she worked herself up and down, he joining her in rhythm as she rode him. He grabbed her hips and assisted her, slamming her harder and harder with each stroke. He felt her muscles around him tighten, and she gasped as her whole body went ridgid. She dug her nails into his chest as she released, he joining her just a moment later. They lay in bed for a couple minutes snuggling and kissing after, the smell of coffee beginning to waft through the cottage.

“I would be happy staying in this bed for the rest of my life, however I really would like a cup of coffee too” she giggled, giving him a quick peck and jumping up. 

She hopped out of bed and walked over to the closet where she pulled one of his button down shirts out and slipped it on. 

“Must you insist on dirtying my nice clean shirt?” he chuckled as he got up and slipped his boxers and t-shirt back on. 

“Indeed I must” she winked, walking out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. 

“So I was thinking, if you wanted to go into London today maybe we could pick up my paycheck from work and get some seafood for dinner? I could really go for some salmon.” She called, pouring herself a cup of coffee. 

When she turned around to walk back to the bedroom, she was startled by a tall figure standing before her. Mia screamed and dropped her coffee cup, shattering it on the stone floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dun dun dunnnnnnn* I've always loved a cliff hanger.  
> I'll be updating another chapter here in the next couple days, so stay tuned!


	24. chapter 24

_**Crash!** _

Remus whipped his head towards the door as he heard a cup shattering on the floor, followed by Mia’s ear splitting scream.

“MIA?” Remus shouted, his heart now pounding in his ears.

He grabbed his wand and ran out of the bedroom, nearly colliding with Sirius who was woken by the sound. The men ran down the hallway to find Mia standing in the kitchen looking startled, hot coffee and chunks of ceramic on the floor, standing in front of Albus Dumbledore. 

“Ah, Remus, Sirius, there you are. Sorry for startling you Amelia, I hope I’m not interrupting anything” Dumbledore said, his bright blue eyes twinkling at her.

Mia felt as though Dumbledore was referring to her wearing Remus’ shirt; she was blushing all the way to ears, mouth gaping and was unable to speak. 

“We didn’t know you’d be stopping by, Dumbledore” said Sirius. 

“I apologize for not writing first, I came to fill you in on what’s been going on, and discuss our next move.” Dumbledore replied; his calm voice made Mia feel extra uncomfortable. 

“Mia wants to join the Order as well; it’s good you came while she was here.” Remus said, transfiguring her cup back to its original state. 

His tone of voice was very even, Mia was surprised Remus was so calm. This was Dumbledore, His previous boss and her headmaster. Why wasn’t Remus freaking out like she was??

“Very well, shall we sit?” Dumbledore asked, motioning to the table. 

“I’m going to go put some pants on” Mia said hoarsely, her face scarlet as Gryffindor’s house banners. 

She scurried off to the bedroom and threw the door shut and took a deep breath. She could hardly believe that Dumbledore had apparated here without any of them hearing him, let alone opened the cottage door. She was furiously embarrassed; her former headmaster seeing her in such little clothing was the most mortifying thing she had experienced. She looked in the mirror on the wall, and to her disdain, realized her hair was a complete mess. _He just had to apparate here the one time I’m half naked, walking around with sex hair_ she thought as she threw her hair into a bun without brushing it. She slipped on the first pair of jeans she could find, and changed from Remus’ oversized button down to a tank top and hoodie. She shuffled out of the bedroom to the dining room, where the three of them sat around the table. Dumbledore was wearing shimmering silver robes, his appearance neat and tidy that gave the impression he was going to be seeing a lot of important people today. He had begun speaking to Remus and Sirius already when Mia slid silently into a chair next to Remus. 

“I got you a fresh cup” Remus said pleasantly, sliding her new cup of coffee to her, steam still rolling off it. 

“Thanks” she squeaked, beginning to blush again as she noticed Dumbledore’s eyes twinkling at her. 

“I was just telling Dumbledore we can use my parent’s old place in London for headquarters for the order” Sirius said to Mia “it has been empty for 10 years, and has quite a bit of concealment charms on it already.” 

Mia nodded at Sirius, taking a sip of her coffee awkwardly. 

“For now, we need to increase our numbers. Recruit. Call on our neighbors, friends, allies, anyone who is willing and able to fight Voldemort and see to it he doesn’t rise to power.” Dumbledore said. “I am visiting those who were in the Order before today, asking the same thing of them. Amelia, I’m actually headed to your mothers after I stop by the Weasley’s”

Dumbledore smiled at her, and Mia choked on a sip of coffee when he mentioned speaking with Susan. 

“uhm, if you could—“ she coughed “not mention to my mother that you saw me here, I would greatly appreciate that, professor.” She said, her voice trailing off softly. 

“Yes, I’m sure you want to tell Susan in your own time about Remus here.” He said with a smirking smile, his eyes now twinkling. “First meeting will be Saturday after next. Sirius, look for my owl this afternoon about getting into headquarters before then to prepare.” 

Dumbledore got up from the table and shook Remus’ hand. 

“Thank you for the coffee. I’ll be in touch” 

He walked to the middle of the room and disapparated, but not before he gave Mia one last pleasant smile. When he was gone, Mia threw her face into her hands and groaned. 

“Professor Dumbledore really had to come here and find me half naked in your kitchen????” she growled, flushing a deep shade of scarlet once more. 

Remus put his hand on her shoulder. 

“You’re not breaking any rules by being here” he said calmly. 

“But we did when we started this!!” she hissed. 

“He wasn’t mad about it, well, at least I think he wasn’t…” Remus started

“He’s known??? Damn it, I should’ve known he knew. He probably reads minds or something” Mia said, her face returning to her hands. 

“He does, actually. He is a legilimens” interjected Sirius. 

“GREAT!” she groaned, rolling her eyes. 

“What exactly are you upset about?” Remus asked her. 

“The obvious; I’m mortified he caught me half naked in the kitchen with sex hair!!” she cried irritably “You all were clothed when you ran out and found him. I might as well as had ‘freshly fucked’ written across my forehead!”

She huffed irritably, and stomped into the kitchen to dump her remaining coffee into the sink. 

“Well, you kind of do, kitten” Sirius laughed, making Remus chuckle with him. 

Mia was so annoyed by the men’s lack of empathy for her embarrassment. 

“I’m going to take a shower” she grumbled, stomping off towards the bedroom and slamming the door shut.

Sirius and Remus burst out laughing after they heard the water turn on.

“Did you know he was coming today?” Sirius snickered.

“No, I didn’t” Remus said between laughs “Had I known I would’ve warned her to get dressed”

* * *

Remus and Mia headed out to London that afternoon, picking up her paycheck and having lunch at a local seafood restaurant. They got Sirius a plate of fish and chips to go, feeling bad that he couldn’t join them in the city for lunch. Remus hated Mia paying for everything when they went out, but he knew he didn’t have it in his budget to afford the pricey lunch. She didn’t seem to blink an eye at it; she reached for the check without even giving him a slight glance. He worked hard to stifle the shame he felt of not being about to take his girlfriend out for a simple meal. 

As they were leaving the restaurant, Mia said “Let’s go back to my place and wait for Penelope. She should be home in an hour, and I want to talk to her about joining the Order”.

They apparated back to Penelope and Mia’s flat, and situated themselves on the couch watching muggle cooking shows until Penelope returned home. 

“Oh hey guys, I didn’t know you were coming back here.” Penelope said pleasantly as she bustled in the front door. “How was lunch?” 

“Delicious!” Mia exclaimed “The box in the fridge is for Sirius, don’t eat it” 

“How is Sirius?” Penelope asked slyly, a bashful smile creeping onto her face. 

“You can always come by and see for yourself” Mia grinned. “He asks about you though” 

“Does he now?” Penelope said, her brow rising.

“Yeah, but we didn’t come here to tease you about Sirius.” Mia giggled “We wanted to talk to you about the Order of the Phoenix” Mia said, her tone more businesslike now. 

“Order of the Phoenix, eh?” Penelope asked, coming to sit on the chair next to the couch “what of it?” 

“Well, I’m joining up. Remus fought last time, so naturally he is a valuable member of the group. I want you to join with me”

“Oh Mia, I don’t know…” Penelope started. 

Mia’s eyes narrowed, shifting on the couch to get a better look at Penelope.

“What do you mean, you don’t know? Voldemort is back and stronger than before; we are only as strong as we are united” 

“Mia… I’m not sure I’m the best fit for the group. I don’t think I would have anything to offer, my family is muggle and I don’t want them to get dragged into the mess.” Penelope looked at her with apologetic eyes. “Plus I’ve got the shop; mum and dad are giving me more responsibilities starting this fall, to prepare me to take over.” 

“Bullshit” Mia muttered quietly. 

“Mia, Penelope has the right to say no if she feels that’s what is best for her. The Order is extremely dangerous, and not for the faint of heart. Penelope’s family would be a target if her name were associated with us. Of course every member helps, but we can’t force her.” Remus said calmly, which irritated Mia even more. 

She got up hastily “I just thought my best friend would be one that wanted to do something to change the world rather than sit in the dark and hide.” She spat, walking over to the fridge and grabbing Sirius’s food. “I’m going back to the cottage” 

She disapparated quicker than either Remus or Penelope could speak; Penelope gave Remus an apologetic look.

“I’m sorry…” she started, but he held his hand up to stop her. 

“Penelope, don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong.” He said kindly. “Mia overreacted.”

“Eh, she tends to be a bit of a bitch when she doesn’t get her way.” Penelope scoffed. “She’ll come around. I hope” 

“She will. I’ll talk to her.” Remus smiled at her and stood up from the couch. “I should follow her back. It was good to see you.” 

“You too” Penelope smiled weakly at him, and with a pop he was gone.

* * *

Mia popped back at the cottage, thrusting the leftovers at Sirius. 

“Here” she growled and stomped off to the bedroom, slamming the door. 

Sirius just blinked at the box in his hands, confused on what just happened. Remus popped into the living room, and looked at Sirius. 

“Where’d she go?” he asked, looking around. 

“Bedroom” Sirius croaked, “What’s gotten into her?” 

“She asked Penelope to join the Order” Remus said, lowering his voice so Mia couldn’t hear them.

“I’m guessing she didn’t like the answer she got?” Sirius asked, scratching his head. 

Remus nodded and held up a finger to tell Sirius he’d be back in a minute. He walked up to the bedroom door and knocked softly. 

“What?” Mia spat through the door. 

“May I come in?” Remus asked sweetly. 

She turned the door handle and popped the door open, and sat down on the bed with her arms crossed. 

“I know you’re upset…” he began, but she cut him off. 

“I can’t believe her! She’s just going to sit back and let him take over again?” she growled, her fists clenched. 

“She is afraid of making her family a target. Voldemort will target anyone and everyone he pleases, muggles being a bonus. It’s a double edge sword for her if she joins.” Remus said, calmly. 

“My dad was a muggle and my mom still joined!” she exclaimed, rolling her eyes.

“And your father was tortured because of it”

Mia stopped, her arms still crossed, but in her frustration with Penelope she had almost forgotten that. Her face softened a little bit, and she cast her eyes downward as Remus sat down next to her.

“When James, Sirius, Peter and I joined the Order, it was exciting. The four of us fighting darkness, making a difference; It was very easy to get caught up in the thrill. We lost people we grew close to, I mean, hell, Peter betrayed us and James and Lily were killed for it.” Remus continued. 

Mia began to pick at her fingernails. 

“I guess I was excited to think of Penny and me fighting together. She’s my best friend, I can’t imagine doing this without her.” she said quietly. 

“I understand, but do you see her side now a little more? She and her family are safer out of the Order” Remus gave her a sympathetic half smile, slipping an arm around her. 

“Yes…” she groaned; she always hated admitting she had been wrong. “You know, you and Penny are very similar.” 

“How so?” his eyebrows rose at her statement. 

“You both are always so calm, and think rationally at every situation. Well, unless it’s a full moon for you, but 99% of the time you do. I don’t know how you guys do it” she said. “It’s surprising you weren’t put in Ravenclaw.”

Remus chuckled. “The sorting hat considered Ravenclaw for me, but sensed that I would be best placed in Gryffindor. I’m not always as rational as her; I have that unbridled Gryffindor bravery that makes me run in dangerous situations without considering consequences. We’re known to be so brave were reckless.” He said, Mia chuckling as she thought of Harry Potter and his friends always running head first into danger. 

Remus continued “Penelope weighed her options when presented with joining the Order, not letting her excitement or bravado cloud her judgement. When I joined the Order before, I didn’t even give the potential ramifications a second thought.” 

“The sorting hat considered me for Gryffindor. Slytherin, too.” Mia said, concentrating most of her picking to her left index finger. “It said Slytherin would be a good choice because I have ambition and drive, but I asked not Slytherin for obvious reasons. It said Gryffindor because it sensed courage and nerve, but Ravenclaw because of intellect and wit, and ‘my acceptance and understanding of others’. I ended up asking for Ravenclaw because of my mother. I wanted to please her so bad; I knew she would be disappointed if I got placed elsewhere. I think had I not asked for Ravenclaw it would’ve put me in Gryffindor.” She explained, Remus giving her shoulder a slight squeeze. 

“I think Ravenclaw was a good fit for you” he said. 

“I always wondered if it was though, I was much more of a rule breaker than the rest of my house, and way more hotheaded. I almost always spout off without thinking first. Penelope was the perfect Ravenclaw, so logical and calculated.” Mia sighed. 

Remus smiled at her “but you were a good fit because of everything the sorting hat told you. I mean, you received top marks your entire time at school, and are a damn good witch. As for acceptance and understanding, I mean, well, look at me. You keep insisting you love me despite what I am.”

Mia leaned her head on his shoulder. “Yeah, you’re alright, I guess” she said with a wry smile.

“No person is black and white, remember that.” he said chuckling, placing a kiss on the top of her head. 

“I’ll make it right with her, but I’m not ready. I’m still disappointed she’s not joining.” Mia said, her voice falling back into a huff. 

“You have a right to your feelings, just don’t wait too long to talk to her” he said standing up and taking her hand. “Come on, let’s go play some poker with Sirius; take your mind off it.” 

“Remus?” she said, making him stop to look at her. She smiled at him fondly “Thanks”.


	25. chapter 25

A few days passed before they had news from Dumbledore. He and Sirius had been corresponding on the location of the Black estate, and had its exact whereabouts protected by a Fidelius charm, with Dumbledore as the secret keeper. Each member of the Order was to receive an enchanted scroll of parchment so they could get into headquarters without trouble. Dumbledore asked the Weasley’s, Remus, Mia, and Sirius to help get the house in somewhat of enough order to have their first meeting. The Black estate, 12 Grimmauld place, had been left empty since Sirius’s mother passed away ten years ago, leaving it to be overrun with doxies and other magical pests.

Remus and Mia stood outside a row of brick townhouses holding their scrolls, unsure if they had apparated to the correct place. The numbers on the houses didn’t appear to be correct; the numbers completely skipped 12, making it seem like the city of London made a mistake when assigning addresses. They checked their instructions on their scrolls, and were instructed to pace 3 steps to the left, and then back to the right. Much to their surprise, the house appeared before them as if it had always been there. 

“I’m not crazy, right? That wasn’t there a second ago” Mia whispered to Remus as they walked up to the front door.

Remus chuckled “you mean it appeared almost as if it were magic?” he said sarcastically.

Mia rolled her eyes and poked him in the ribs playfully. “Shut up” she snorted.

They knocked and opened the door, walking into a dusty, old home that looked as if it had never seen daylight. Waiting in the living room right off the entrance way was Arthur and Molly Weasley, Sirius and Dumbledore.

“There she is!” Sirius said to Mia jovially, kissing her on the cheek as they hugged. 

Mia smiled at him and turned her attention Dumbledore, his blue eyes twinkling curiously. 

“Hello Amelia” he said, smiling pleasantly. 

“Hey, professor” she said, nodding, feeling a slight surge of embarrassment when the memory of Dumbledore seeing her in very little clothes ran though her mind. 

“Mia, what a pleasant surprise!” said Arthur, shaking her hand as Remus was giving Molly a hello hug. “Sirius said Remus was bringing his girlfriend…?” he continued, looking at Mia slightly puzzled. 

Mia scratched her head awkwardly as Remus slid his arm around Mia, giving Arthur a confident smile. 

“Mia is my girlfriend, Arthur” 

“Ohhh…” Arthur said, trying to not look surprised, but failing miserably. 

Mia gave Molly a forced awkward smile, which was returned with a much more genuine one. Molly then clapped her hands together and spoke. “Alright, everyone is here, let’s get started”

They spent the majority of their time cleaning and straightening up the kitchen, dining and living room areas of the house, which was much more difficult than expected. There were cobwebs everywhere, and many different creatures were present underneath couch cushions and in cupboards. Mia felt uneasy every time she found an elderly house elf peering at her from around corners. 

“Don’t mind Kreacher, he’s losing his marbles” Sirius had whispered to her when he noticed Kreacher scowling at her. 

Kreacher walked around mumbling things to himself, and Mia was certain he didn’t realize they could hear him. 

“If only Mistress could see what they were doing to her house, yes, Kreacher knows what is going on. Master has let half breeds and blood traitors in his Mistresses’ house, oh if only she knew.” Kreacher mumbled grumpily.

Mia about pulled her wand on him when she heard him refer to Remus as a half breed. He had heard this too, and stopped her from sending a hex at the loony elf. 

“Just ignore him” Remus whispered, as he was scourgifying couch cushions. 

As Mia went to sweep the entryway, she accidentally kicked an iron umbrella stand, making the most horrible noise echo through the house. It was the shrillest screaming she had ever heard, shouting horrible obscenities.

**“BLOOD TRAITORS! HALF BREEDS! DISGUSTING FILTH!”**

Mia covered her ears and watch Sirius run up a half flight of stairs, wrestling with the curtains that covered a portrait she hadn’t noticed before. 

“Shut up you nasty bitch!” he shouted over the portraits shrill screams, yanking the curtains closed finally and holding them shut. 

After a minute, the portrait’s shrieking died down and Sirius slunk back into the living room. 

“Well, everyone, you’ve now met my mother. Lovely woman. If we could keep the noise down, she should stay quiet” 

Everyone nodded, and Mia mouthed ‘I’m sorry’ silently at Sirius. He returned a grin and a wink, which made her feel more at ease.

* * *

After they had finished cleaning for the day, Molly had prepared a pork roast for dinner, the smell wafting through the downstairs as she took it out of the oven. It smelled delicious, and looked even better when she sat down at the table next to Remus. Sirius sat on the other side of Mia, and Dumbledore, Arthur and Molly situated themselves across the table. They began dinner with idle chit chat, talking about the Ministry and Cornelius Fudge’s paranoia, and who was to be expected at the meeting the following day. 

“So, Remus, how long have you and Mia been seeing each other?” Arthur asked with genuine innocence, changing the subject at a natural lull in the conversation. 

Mia choked on her bite of pork roast she was swallowing and Remus coughed awkwardly. 

“Well, er…” Remus had begun, his eyes looking at Dumbledore who was returning a stare, that same smirk and twinkling eyes that were so difficult to read. 

“We broke up for a bit, but have been back together since February” Mia jumped in quickly, “I guess we lost count at the rest” 

“Ohh” said Arthur, not picking up on the awkwardness of their body language. Molly on the other hand, did pick this up because she raised her eyebrows at the two of them. Mia changed the subject hastily.

“How is Percy? Penelope hasn’t spoken with him since they broke up. Is he enjoying his new position? I heard he got a promotion from an article that came out in the Daily Prophet.” Mia asked. 

At the sound of Percy’s name, Arthur stiffened, and Molly looked as if she was about to cry. Mia furrowed her brow, unsure of why the mood in the room changed. 

Sirius leaned over and whispered “Percy and they aren’t speaking. Percy is taking Fudge’s side.” 

Mia instantly felt uncomfortable, feeling as if she put her foot in her mouth by bringing him up. 

“I am so sorry; I wouldn’t’ve brought it up if I had known….” 

She felt terrible, she had no idea that Percy was estranged from his family, but it honestly didn’t surprise her. She had gotten to know Percy quite well, and he always had a superiority complex. 

“It’s ok, dear, not to worry” Molly said, wiping her tears, trying to smile. “Here, eat some more potatoes”. 

* * *

The Order Members were gathering around the very large kitchen table at 12 Grimmauld Place the following day. Mia and Remus were the first to have arrived; they helped Sirius set up a larger table for the meeting, and cleared some cobwebs that crept back up despite the heavy cleaning the day before. Mia was still a little resentful that Penelope wasn’t there; she was still having a hard time that her best friend didn’t want to join the cause against Voldemort. She tried to remain logical about the dangers Remus warned her about, but she almost felt like the fight was worth the risk.

As people began to shuffle in, Mia was happy to see some familiar faces. Arthur and Molly Weasley shuffled in with their oldest son, Bill, who all greeted her warmly.

“Hello, Mia dear” Molly exclaimed, coming over to hug her. 

She felt like she barely knew Arthur and Molly, but after dinner yesterday they made her feel like she was one of their oldest friends. 

“Hey Mia” Bill said grinning; his handsome features looked like they were chiseled onto a smooth slab of porcelain. 

“Hey Bill, long time no see” she smiled back at him. 

She always liked Bill, he was a 6th year prefect when she was a 1st year, and he was always very accommodating when he caught her out of bed walking off a nightmare. She thought Bill looked like the epitome of cool; his handsome features balanced well with his long, red hair gathered in a low ponytail.

Soon after the Weasleys arrived, Nymphadora Tonks and Alastor ‘Mad Eye’ Moody entered the kitchen. Moody was her mother’s first partner after becoming an Auror; Susan always said he taught her everything she knows. His thunking footsteps from his wooden leg echoed through the basement kitchen as he shuffled to an open chair. Mia admired Tonks’s bright, bubblegum pink hair, secretly wishing she were cool enough to pull off such a bold hairstyle. She remembered Tonks getting into trouble quite a bit while at Hogwarts, but didn’t know her very well due to being in different houses, and Tonks being 3 classes ahead. Susan told her that she loved using her metamorphmagus talents to play pranks on the other Aurors in the office, but when it came down to business, she was serious.

Dumbledore greeted everyone kindly upon his arrival, but the surprising one for Mia to see arrive was Severus Snape, wearing a look as if he had dung smeared under his nose. His billowing black robes and long, greasy black hair that curtained around his face looked out of place amongst the crowd.

A few more people Mia didn’t recognize trickled in before Susan and her partner, Kingsley Shacklebolt arrived. A look of bewilderment flashed across Susan’s face when she saw her daughter sitting at the large table. 

“Mia, what are you doing here??” Susan gasped. 

Mia’s palms began to sweat, but tried to remain cool as a cucumber in front of her mother; After all, she was of age and could join the Order if she pleased.

“I’m joining up” she said casually, shrugging insubordinately. 

“Amelia Evelyn, you are not! This organization is dangerous, you can get yourself killed.” She scolded. 

“Yes mum, I am aware of the risks, but it’s my choice to fight this fight if I want to. You’re here, so why can’t I be?” Mia said, irritation creeping into her voice.

“Because you are not an experienced enough witch; you think you know what you’re getting into but you don’t.” Susan glared at her, her intense stare willing her daughter to get up and leave. 

Mia stood up from her chair, leaning forward and putting her palms flat on the table, her temper taking over. 

“My combative and defensive spells are excellent, mother. You wouldn’t know that because you insist I bury my head inside a book 24/7” Mia growled angrily. 

“BECAUSE BOOKS KEEP YOU SAFE” Susan cried, banging her fist on the table as she spoke. 

“I’m not a child; I have every right to fight against Voldemort as everyone else in this room!” She shouted, Arthur shuddering at the sound of Voldemort’s name.

Remus thought Mia was going to launch across the table at her mother, and stood up to intervene. He placed one hand on Mia’s waist, and the other on her shoulder to try to pull her back down into her chair. 

“Mia, let’s just sit down…” he began.

Susan’s eyes began darting back and forth between them. Susan picked up on their body language, and her eyes narrowed. 

“Wait a second, what is this?” she said pointing to the two of them. 

The tension in the room was awful; the other Order members feeling uncomfortable that they were witnessing this squabble. Remus’s eyes had a slight panic in them, but Mia remained unchanged, palms still on the table and glaring right at her mother. 

“When did this happen????” Susan bellowed, her eyes still darting between them. 

Mia was frozen in her angry stare; Remus cleared his throat awkwardly, not wanting to say the words that Susan already knew. 

“Does she know what you are?” Susan asked Remus, asking in a calmer, quieter voice that was more unnerving than her shouting. 

“Yes mother, I know he is a werewolf” Mia answered for him snottily, her glare intensifying. 

They held their stare for about 30 seconds, tension so thick in the room that you could cut it with a knife. Susan’s emerald green eyes nearly glowed with anger, her chest felt tight with anxiety and fury, her ears burning hot. She finally took a breath, breaking her stare and looked at Remus. 

“Remus, I’d like to speak with you in the other room.” she said with the same unnerving calmness. 

Remus nodded and swallowed hard, and went to go follow her out into the living room. 

“Remus, you don’t have to…” Mia whispered to him through gritted teeth. 

“It’s ok” he gave her a weak smile, and exited with Susan. 

Mia banged her fists on the table and let out a frustrated grunt. 

“SHE’S IMPOSSIBLE!” she growled, walking over to the window to look outside.

Sirius, afraid she was going to punch through the window, got up to console her.

* * *

In the next room over, Susan turned around to face Remus, who was shuffling slowly behind her. 

“My daughter, Remus???” She hissed, making him run his hand through his hair awkwardly. 

“Susan, let me explain…” He began, but she cut him off instantly. 

“You were her teacher!” she was shooting daggers out of her eyes. 

“I KNOW! I know. We didn’t meet in the best of circumstances…” 

“Best of circumstances??” she scoffed at him “More like you took advantage of a young pretty girl. You abused your power as her professor for your own entertainment!”

“No, Susan it wasn’t like that— isn’t like that. I love Mia.”

“Love her?? You shouldn’t’ve been anywhere near her! She should’ve known better, you should’ve known better” Susan growled.

“I know, you’re right, I did know better, I take full responsibility for my actions. I told myself what we were doing was inappropriate, but I- I couldn’t stay away.” He said, looking down at the floor in submission. “And it’s very difficult to change her mind when she wants something.” He added, mumbling.

“Sounds like my daughter.” Susan said curtly, crossing her arms.

Remus swallowed hard, feeling more uncomfortable than he thought he had felt in his entire life.

“I tried to break it off at the end of the school year because of…” He paused; he hated saying he was a werewolf. He felt disgusting saying the words. “…Because of what I am. I thought she deserved someone, well, not me. I thought it was what was best for her.” 

“End of the school year?? So you’re the reason she was so heartbroken last year?” Susan asked pointedly. 

Remus gave her a weak nod, looking down at the floor again. 

“She cried herself sick for months over you!” Susan hissed, throwing her hands in the air. “She quit eating, she couldn’t sleep, and she was withering down to nothing because of you!” 

“It was a mistake, Susan. I should’ve never let her go, I see that now. When she found me this winter, I realized letting her go was the opposite of what was best for her. I screwed up” 

“Yes, Remus, you did screw up, in more than one way. I should hex you right here and now for what you put her through!” 

Susan took a breath, her voice becoming more calm and calculated.

“Now you know I don’t have any prejudice against werewolves, but what if you scratch her? What if you bite and infect her?”

“We are careful, I swear. I make her stay away from me during the full moons as a precaution despite that she learned to be an Animagus, so if she is transformed she will be safe if I forget my potion.” Remus said, but the moment he saw Susan’s face twist up he regretted being the one to tell her Mia had become an Animagus. 

“Animagus? What do you mean she is an Animagus? That takes years to learn and there is a long process she’d have to go through” She asked, her eyes flickering but her voice sounded like she didn’t believe him. 

“She learned in a couple of months, it’s very impressive she learned so quickly. She is a very talented witch.” Remus said; he couldn’t help but smile when talking about how much Mia impressed him. 

“I just checked the registry last month and she’s not on it” Susan sneered.

“She’s not registered.” He said quietly, looking down at the floor again as if he was a child whose mother caught him stealing a cookie before dinner. 

Susan took a deep, calculated breath and crossed her arms. 

“Did you teach my daughter to become an Animagus illegally?” she asked dangerously, just above a whisper. 

“No, not me” Remus said uncomfortably. 

Susan paused for a minute and thought. It couldn’t’ve been Professor McGonagall; she would’ve made Mia take the proper steps of going about it legally. She then remembered Dumbledore’s visit when he came to bring her back to the Order. He had explained Sirius’ innocence and that he was an unregistered animagus, and that he had been around the castle for part of the first year he was on the run. 

“Sirius.” she whispered, and Remus’ eyes grew wide, knowing what was about to come for his friend. “SIRIUS BLACK!” she shouted, turning back to the kitchen. 

Sirius jumped ten feet into the air when he heard Susan shout his name. She came storming back in and pulled her wand on Sirius. 

“You taught my daughter to become an Animagus, ILLEGALLY?” she shouted at him, Sirius had his hands in the air, looking terrified as if he was being arrested by dementors. “She could go to Azkaban if she was caught!” 

“Mum!” Mia yelled, trying to get her mother to calm down. 

“ENOUGH!” Dumbledore boomed, and the room fell silent. “Susan for goodness sake- lower your wand!” 

Susan lowered her wand slowly, looking at Dumbledore. 

“Now, we all have bared witness to this very interesting family matter, but we need to get started discussing the tasks at hand. This… spectacle will have to wait until after.” He said; his voice calm now and he motioned for everyone to sit down.

Susan sat down in a huff, giving Sirius and Remus both a look that could kill, while Mia was shooting the same glance back at her.

* * *

The first part of the meeting went well, despite the scene that had erupted before. Dumbledore updated everyone with the facts of what happened with the Tri-wizard tournament, so that everyone was on the same page. Kingsley and Susan were leading the investigation against Sirius, and had informed the group they were now feeding the ministry information that Sirius was hiding in Tibet. As Kingsley spoke about their investigation against Sirius, Mia caught Tonks making eyes at him. Mia knew Kingsley fairly well, Susan and him being partners for the last few years since Kingsley was made head of their team. He was a bit younger than Susan, maybe just over 30, but Susan had told her that he was one of the best Aurors in the ministry. His pearly white teeth sparkled against his dark complexion, and his slow, deep voice could lull anyone into a state of relaxation. 

“Now, we need to discuss the safety of Harry Potter” Dumbledore said, making Sirius sit up and listen intently. “I think its best that he is not left alone, as he is not supposed to use magic outside of school he may get himself into a predicament with that. I have an old friend in Little Whinging, Arabella Figg, that keeps an eye out, but she is a squib, unable to defend Harry if need be. We are going to take shifts watching him. She has graciously opened her home to house whoever is on duty. We are on 24 hour monitoring, starting with Remus after this meeting on night shift, then Emmaline in the morning, followed by Mia the next evening. I have devised a schedule for the next couple weeks for you all to refer to when your shifts are, and will have it scheduled out until we can safely transport him here in the next couple days. The parchment will be posted on the kitchen wall, here” 

Dumbledore waved his hand and a poster-sized parchment appeared on the wall. 

“Albus, certainly you don’t think it’s smart to put such an inexperienced witch on guard duty?” Susan asked incredulously. 

Mia shot her a nasty glare, which Susan returned with one as equally intense. 

“Susan, I wouldn’t’ve have put her on duty if I didn’t believe whole heartedly she could handle it. She is an exceptional witch, capable of producing a corporeal patronus, a skilled dueler, and an intensity that burns quite like your own. I needn’t remind you of her NEWT scores; however I know she is capable of magic beyond NEWT level. She is your daughter, after all.” Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling at Susan. 

“I just think that maybe some of the younger members should go through some extra training.” Susan said frankly as she crossed her arms and slunk back in her chair.

Mia rolled her eyes at her mother, annoyed furiously by her attitude. 

“Yes, well, I think the entire organization should be practicing as well. We all can get fuzzy around the edges, so it wouldn’t hurt to shape up on our dueling. We’ll begin training sessions once a week, thank you for the excellent idea, Susan.” 

Susan huffed as Dumbledore proceeded to speak more, shooting another sour glance at Mia. Mia was surprised at how patient Dumbledore was with her mother, because Susan was the one person that could drive her up the wall.

After the meeting, the members started to break off, some checking the guard schedule, some going up to others to have a chat.

“Remus, Arthur, Sirius, could I have a word?” Dumbledore asked, and the 3 men and him retreated in a corner and began talking inaudibly. 

Mia went up to the schedule of duty and checked her days. 

“AHHH Dumbledore gave me duty twice in a row!” a low, gravelly voice exclaimed. She turned to look at Mundugus Fletcher, a short, ginger-haired man with severe dark circles under his eyes. 

“oh Mundungus, it won’t kill you to do some work every once in a while!” Molly snapped. 

Mia giggled at the two of them bantering back and forth at each other. She liked Molly’s fire and spirit; it was much like her own. She knew two of her shifts she was going to have to find coverage at work for, but the schedule made sense. Remus was on a lot of day shifts compared to a lot of the other members. Susan, Tonks and Kingsley had all nights, which Mia figured was because they had to work at the ministry during the day. She turned to look at Susan who was in the middle of a conversation with Kingsley and Sturgis Podmore. Mia felt irritation raise in her again, her mother made her look like a fool to the entire Order. Her attention shifted when she saw Remus walking towards her, the private chat in the corner disbanding. 

“Mia, could I ask a couple favors of you?” He said; a warm smile on his face. 

“Of course, anything” she said. 

“Would you be able to go to the cottage and pack some of my things? Some clothes, toiletries and as many potions as the bag fits; Also, close up the cottage to be away for a few weeks?” he asked. 

“Yeah I can do that” she said, giving him a puzzled look. 

“Thanks, I’m going to be staying here for a bit, and I won’t have time to go back to the cottage for a few days. You’re helping me out a lot.” He smiled at her. “Sirius gave me one of the second floor bedrooms for us to use” 

“Us?” her eyes lit up. 

“Of course” he chuckled “you don’t have to stay here permanently, but the door is always open for you”. 

She grinned and kissed him, catching an irritated glare from her mother. 

“I’ve got to go” he said. “I’ll be back here tomorrow morning after Emmaline relieves me” 

Mia nodded and Remus went over to Dumbledore, who disapparated together with a pop. She had been so focused on watching him leave that she didn’t even notice Susan walk over. She jumped slightly when she turned her head, her mother’s presence startling her.

“I want to hear it from you.” Susan said coolly, her lips pursed in disatisfaction. 

“Hear what?” she said, playing stupid just to get under her mother’s skin. 

“I want you to tell me what on earth you are doing with Remus” Susan replied curtly, knowing very well that Mia was trying to be a snot. 

Mia sighed in irritation. “Well, we’re together, as you already know” she said flatly. 

“Don’t get smart with me Amelia, he is 15 years older than you. Did you even think how wrong it was to begin a relationship with your teacher??” Susan hissed, keeping her voice down so she didn’t draw attention to them speaking. 

Mia wished she would’ve shown this much restraint before and not caused a scene at the beginning of the meeting. 

“Yes Mum, but I love him. I wouldn’t change anything.” Mia said, her hands shaking slightly with being so honest with her mother. 

“And then he broke your heart because he was leaving Hogwarts and didn’t need your company, but now he’s keeping you around to keep cozy during his time in the Order?” 

“No, he’s not like that. He is a good man. Yes, he broke up with me but it was only because he thought it was what was right. I see that now. He loves me.” 

Susan took a deep breath, not satisfied by what she is hearing. “I was once a young girl, so I understand how you got this infatuated with him, but he is a grown adult and should’ve known better. He used poor judgement, and I just don’t trust whatever the hell this is. I saw what you went through, and had I known it was him that caused it….” 

“You would’ve hexed him, believe me, I know what you would’ve done, but Remus and I are in love. He’s the one for me, and I would like it if you supported us.” 

Susan let out a bark of cynical laughter and shook her head in frustration, walking away from Mia without saying anything further. She knew she had no say now that Mia was out of school, just as she had no say in her joining the Order, but she still didn’t like it. Her protective maternal instincts were going wild, and she disliked the idea of Remus anywhere near Mia. 

* * *

Mia apparated to the cottage and began packing some of their belongings. She packed a bunch of his clothes in varying states of shabbiness, and an assortment of Wolfsbane and pain potions. She grabbed everything of hers that she kept there and packed it in her trunk, laughing that she was probably going to give the impression they were moving in permanently. She found some spare bedsheets and covered the furniture, and began locking up the windows with a strong locking charm. She stopped when she noticed a picture frame of a photo that Sirius took of her and Remus by the lake. She smiled at seeing the two of them laughing and hugging, and grabbed the frame to pack it. 

After doing a final sweep, she locked the front door and walked over to the shed to ensure everything got sealed in. She organized a few of the items inside, and sealed the barn with the same locking charm she did with the house. She stopped to look at the cottage just before apparating back to headquarters, a little sad to see it locked up. She had grown to love this little ramshackle of a place, and held many happy memories with Remus. She shook it off, realizing they would be back at some point, and was gone with a soft pop.

With another pop, Mia was back at 12 Grimmauld place with her trunk in tow. She was displeased to see Susan was still there; she was in the corner of the living room talking to Sirius, looking quite furious. Both of them saw Mia, Sirius giving her a look that read ‘help me’.

“Mia, dear, follow me. I’ll show you where you can put your things” said a voice from behind her. 

She turned around to see Molly Weasley gesturing to her. She followed Molly up the stairs and down the second floor hallway to one of the bedrooms. 

“This one will do I hope, it’s one of the only ones that I have gotten cleaned out” 

The bedroom was a normal size room with a queen size bed. The walls had powder blue flowered wallpaper that was peeling in the corner slightly. An oak dresser sat across from the bed against the wall that had the door, with a mirror hanging next to it. 

“This should be fine, thanks Molly.” Mia said, trying to force up a smile. 

“Sure thing, dear, are you hungry? I was going to make something for some of the members who were hanging around?” 

“Yeah, I could eat. I’ll be down in a few”. 

She unpacked her clothes into the drawers on the right side of the dresser, and unpacked Remus’s into the left side. She pulled out the picture frame of them standing by the lake and placed it on the dresser. She took a moment to look at the picture, smiling as she watched Remus wrap his arm around her over and over again as the picture replayed the moment it captured. Her concentration was broken when she heard a slight knock on the door.

“Hey, kitten, settling in?” Sirius said, poking his head in the doorway. 

“Yeah, thanks for letting us stay here for a bit” she said.

“Of course!” he said grinning “your mum was having my head for it”. 

Mia rolled her eyes and turned to face Sirius, irritation visible in her expression. 

“What’d she say to you?” she asked flatly. 

“Oh, just expressing her dissatisfaction for letting you and Remus stay here. She’s not too thrilled with the two of you; or with me, for teaching you the animagus transfiguration. ” he said, looking at the floor sheepishly. 

“Yeah, she made that pretty clear when she pulled her wand on you” she chuckled sardonically.

“She’s just protective of you. I think it would’ve gone better had you told her before finding out the way she did. She just got a nasty shock tonight, that’s all. She’ll come ‘round” Sirius gave her a confident smile. “She decided not to stay for dinner, so it’s safe to come down” 

“Thank merlin.” she said under her breath.

Sirius wrapped his arm around her and led her out of the bedroom, beginning to tell her a bad joke.

“So a wizard, a werewolf and a vampire walked into a bar...”

* * *

Susan walked into her bedroom hastily, nearly tearing off her earrings and throwing them onto her dresser. She furiously unzipped her black dress, slipping it off and kicking it aside, missing the hamper. She stormed into the bathroom and clipped her hair back, vigorously washing her face to remove her makeup. She grabbed at the hand towel hanging on a small hook next to her bathroom vanity, drying her face firmly. She looked up at herself in the mirror and paused for a minute. She looked at her now visible dark circles once covered by makeup, and her fine lines next to her eyes. She pulled the skin back on her forehead, and observed her face intently; dissatisfied that her age of 42 years was showing on her once smooth, pale skin. 

She took a deep breath, her mind replaying her conversations with Remus and Mia. She was incredibly upset with both of them; Mia should’ve known better not to get involved with a teacher, but Remus, being closer to her age than Mia’s, should’ve stayed far away from her in her opinion. She was angry that they had continued an inappropriate relationship for so long, but also angry with herself that she hadn’t known about it. She felt that Remus, someone she had called a friend, violated her trust. She felt betrayed, and her maternal instincts made her want to rip his throat for not only pursuing Mia, but breaking her heart the year prior.

The sound of Mia sobbing into her pillows haunted her; it had broken Susan’s heart to see her daughter in such turmoil. She would beg Mia to eat, watching her stare at a bowl of oatmeal lifelessly, only consuming 3 bites before she would start to gag on her food and cry again. Susan had sworn when she met the person responsible for her daughter’s first heartbreak that she would make them sorry for hurting her. Now that she knew that person was Remus, she couldn’t figure out how to handle the situation. She knew deep down that he was a good man, but her knowledge of this was clouded by her anger and resentment.

She walked out of the bathroom and threw on a pair of sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt, making her way downstairs, where she poured herself a rather large glass of merlot before situating herself on the couch. She took a sip, her glass containing about half the bottle of wine. She tried to push any thought out of her exhausted mind when she noticed the family photo box sitting on the coffee table in front of her. She leaned over and set her glass down, grabbing the box and settling it in her lap. 

She flipped through the photos, staring at ones of Mia learning to ride a bike, photos of John, Mia and her on vacation at the beach, Mia holding up her first tooth she lost, Mia in Kings Cross station on the first day of term her first year at Hogwarts, and a wedding photo of her and John. The photos made her emotions run high, her chest tightening with anxiety. She felt sadness wash over her as her thoughts shifted from Mia to John. They had been divorced 16 years, but there wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t think of him. She loved him after all this time, her love forcing her to be strong. She couldn’t restore his memory, his lack of knowledge is what she felt kept him safe. She had gone back and forth so many times about restoring his mind, but her fear always won in the end. Watching him marry Miranda was one of the hardest things she went through, but she loved him so much she couldn’t bear to confuse him with the memories of that horrible night so long ago, and why their marriage really ended. She put the photos back in the box and set it on the couch next to her, and began to sob. The house was dark, quiet, and lonely, the sound of her sobs reverberating sorrowfully off the walls of the living room. She wept over the memories of her ex-husband, wishing to have him by her side, holding her and telling her everything was ok. She wept over the fate of Mia, fear of her daughter getting hurt again making her chest ache with worry. Lastly, she wept for herself, overcome with a tidal wave of emotions from the events of the day that she, like Mia, was not very good at dealing with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> long-ish chapter, but there was no good place to split it into two! 
> 
> I absolutely love Susan; she is so fun to write. She is a 'take no prisoners', firm and fearsome mama bear who will cut you if you hurt her family. Her and Mia are both mostly annoyed by each other because they are so similar! The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
> 
> Also, not much about Kingsley is relayed in the HP books, especially relating to his age and life before the Order, but in this fic, Kingsley is in the 30-32 years old range, very sharply dressed, and beefy. He'd be the guy you see at the gym who could lift a house without breaking a sweat. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading; please leave me a review if you are enjoying this fic thus far!


	26. chapter 26

The summer heat was almost unbearable at 12 Grimmauld place. They had cooling charms placed on the house, much like a muggle air conditioner, but the charms were having trouble keeping up with the blazing sunlight that was pouring in, cooking the air’s temperature. Stepping outside felt like you were walking into an oven and most of the country was experiencing a draught. The Black house needed quite a bit of work to make it inhabitable, as it sat for 10 years empty, many creatures found their way into the home and took root. Mia and Remus had been staying at 12 Grimmauld place for about a week, and much to Mia’s pleasure hadn’t seen much of Susan. She had stopped by one day after watch duty; shooting Remus dirty looks any chance she got. Remus had relayed the details of the conversation he had with Susan to Mia at the first Order meeting, only making her more irritated at her mother. 

“I just wish she could be happy with at least one thing I do, I always disappoint her.” Mia had told Remus in irritation.

He had tried to console her on this, but without much luck. 

Headquarters was very uncomfortable to be in with the heat wave, but even Arabella Figg’s house wasn’t much better. Mia had been miserable in the few times she was on watch duty, missing the cool, crisp air conditioning of her flat. Penelope had briefly mentioned the air at the flat had a hard time keeping up as well during this heat spell. Penelope and she had been cordial to each other, but she still hadn’t made things completely right with her. Their conversations were stiff, the politeness forced and they lacked much emotional depth. They really only chatted to keep up a decent appearance to Richard and Charlotte at work, as Penelope was choosing to currently keep them in the dark with the things going on in the wizarding world. Mia wasn’t ready to apologize just yet, still having trouble stifling feelings of disappointment. Remus insisted she talk it out with her, for which she usually rolled her eyes at him and changed the subject, avoiding her feelings all together.

Molly was frantic trying to get the Black house cleaned up so that the teens would have a place to sleep without being bitten by a doxy or two. Or 30. The Weasley children plus Hermione were expected to arrive the next morning after the full moon, so Molly was dividing and conquering a few of the rooms upstairs with Mia and Sirius’ help. Remus was talking strategy to escort Harry from his aunt and uncles’ to headquarters safely with Dumbledore and Moody, the Aurors and other members of the Order off at their jobs, carrying on life as normal. Dumbledore had just given Mundungus a schedule of his shifts for watching Harry this week and by no means was he to leave early from any of them for some of his shady business dealings. He left headquarters in a huff, muttering irritated phrases under his breath.

“Honestly, I don’t even know why Sirius wanted him here” Molly had whispered to Mia as they were walking upstairs to deworm one of the bedrooms. 

“I can hear you” Sirius muttered, sing-songy.

Mia giggled at the scowling expression that Molly shot Sirius. She hated Mundungus and Sirius’s trust of him, and it was no secret.

It was absolutely blazing hot in the upstairs bedroom, Mia’s skin felt damp and sticky, and the air was thick with humidity. Molly had tried casting a cooling charm on the room itself, but it barely kept up in comparison to the heat wave outside. The three of them were extremely thirsty, so Mia volunteered to go get some glasses of water from the kitchen. She walked quietly down the halls, not to disturb the paintings that shouted horrible obscenities if woken up, and into the basement kitchen. The men clambered around a map on the dining room table, and broke their conversation to look up at her when she entered. 

“Sorry, just grabbing some water!” She said cheerily, walking over to the kitchen sink and wetting a hand towel, using it to sponge her neck, face and chest in an attempt to cool down.

Dumbledore and Moody returned to their map, but Remus couldn’t focus with Mia in the room. His sense of smell was heightened this close to the moon, he could smell her sweat mixing with her pheromones, along with traces of arousal that was extremely intoxicating. She looked so delectable standing over the kitchen sink sponging herself, her jean shorts hugging her butt in just the perfect way. Remus felt the strong urge to bend her over the kitchen sink and take her right there, but fought furiously to keep this at bay. She fixed a tray with a pitcher of ice water and 3 glasses, and turned to exit the kitchen when she realized Remus was staring at her. His gaze burned into her as he watched her walk through the kitchen. She shot him a curious look, wondering as to why he was staring at her like that, and exited the kitchen. _You can’t take her this close to the moon; you could hurt her_ he told himself, staring at the kitchen door where she had just gone through. 

“Remus, you’ll be coming with Tonks, Kingsley and I…” he heard Moody say to him, snapping his attention back on the plan. 

“Yes, and Susan will be leading the rear, correct?” Remus said, pretending that he was listening the whole time. 

After another hour or so, it was time for lunch. Molly and Sirius joined Dumbledore, Moody and Remus at the table, talking over their plan they have just orchestrated, while Mia bobbed around the kitchen making sandwiches and potato salad. Mia had argued with Molly about letting her make lunch for everyone so she could take a break, seeing as how Molly cooked every other meal. After much playful bickering and Sirius’s rising annoyance, Molly sighed and admitted defeat.

Remus once again couldn’t focus. Her smell was drawing him to her; he could see a few tiny beads of sweat between her shoulder blades, and her wispy hairs at the nape of her neck sticking to her skin. He about tackled her when he saw her sponging herself off again, the way she craned her neck made him want to sink his teeth in the crook. 

_Shake it off, Remus_ he told himself. 

She turned around to bring the bowl of potato salad over and saw him staring at her again, eyes flickering. She rolled her eyes at him, which made his brow rise slightly, smirking at her.

Over lunch, the conversation shifted to how they were going to escort the Weasley children and Hermione safely to headquarters. Susan and Kingsley were going to escort Fred and George, Arthur escorting Ron, Tonks escorting Ginny, and Mia was to get Hermione from her parent’s house, her not having a chance to get to the Burrow yet. Bill and Moody were going to follow behind Mia in case of an attack, and Hestia Jones and Mundungus Fletcher were going to follow behind the group leaving the Burrow. Emmaline Vance was on guard for Harry, a last minute switch on Dumbledore’s part, thinking that Mundungus might try to leave guard duty early if put on 2 days in a row. Much to Sirius’ dissatisfaction, he was stuck helping Remus recover from the transformation. He didn’t mind helping his friend, but he was feeling useless to the Order since he couldn’t leave the house without the fear of being captured by the Ministry. The hunt for Sirius was top priority for the Ministry, and they had to be careful. Remus kept staring at Mia as they ate, his eyes showing an intensity Mia wasn’t used to seeing before. She made silly faces at him, making him break his stare, only to continue when she looked away. He kept imagining throwing her onto the table and tearing her clothes off, the thought making his cock twitch. 

“I’m going to take a quick shower, Molly, and then I’ll be able to help you tackle that second bedroom.” She said, rising from the table after they had finished eating. 

Remus sat there for a minute staring at the path she had taken to exit. He could still smell her scent even as it was getting fainter, as if he could follow the trail and lead him to her. _Don’t follow her, Remus, let her be_ he thought, but lost the internal battle. 

“I’ll be back” he grunted to Sirius. 

He made his way up to the bedroom they had been staying in, her scent growing stronger as he approached. He could smell a slight hint of arousal in her scent, as his heightened senses picked up on much more than what he normally could. When he reached the bedroom, she had been about to walk to the bathroom with her fresh clothes and towel when she turned and saw him standing in the doorway, startling her. 

“Geez Remus” she said, grasping her chest with one hand. 

He was staring at her with the same intensity as before, causing her to give him another curious look. 

“What’s gotten into you?” she said, chuckling. 

He said nothing and walked into the room, locking the door and silencing the room. He grabbed her shoulders and threw her up against the wall, pinning her as he ran his hands down her body. 

“You smell so good; I’ve been able to smell you all day” he said in a husky whisper. 

“Wait… you can smell… that???” she asked, cringing. 

He gave her a devilish grin. 

“That’s disgusting” she laughed “Let me go take a shower.” 

“No no no, not yet” he said, kissing her firmly. 

She wrapped her arms around him, and he picked her up and slammed her tighter against the wall. He grabbed at her tank top furiously, a few seams making a pop noise as they tore. 

“I thought you didn’t want to have sex this close to the full moon?” she asked, breaking the kiss suddenly. 

“Usually, but today, you’ve been begging me to do this. You’ve been walking around this house, in those little shorts, sponging yourself, begging me to fuck you” he growled, carrying her over to the bed and bending her over the edge. “You’ve been teasing me, and we know I don’t like to be teased”

He yanked down her shorts and smacked her right butt cheek, massaging and kneading it after. 

“Your actions have consequences, if you remember” he whispered in her ear, smacking her hard again. 

Mia couldn’t believe how turned on she was by this. Remus was always so gentle with her, but she liked this rougher, more primal version of him. He smacked her again, her skin turning red in the shape of his hand print. She winced every time he struck her, her arousal growing stronger by the second. He massaged her for a moment to soothe the sting, and flipped her onto her back. He ripped her tank top and bra open with tremendous force, bending over her and kissing her hard so she couldn’t protest. Her scent was even more powerful to him now, making him feel like he was going to lose control. He ran his tongue along his teeth as he surveyed her, naked and sprawled on the bed, all for him. She gripped the bedsheets firmly as he slipped two fingers inside her, hitting the sweet spot that made her writhe with pleasure. 

He whispered in her ear “I’m going to fuck you so hard it’s going to make you scream”. 

She could practically orgasm already she was so hot and bothered. She nodded, looking at him with pleading eyes. He pulled his fingers out and unbuckled his pants. He spread her legs further, grabbed her hips and pulled her to the edge of the bed. He ran the tip of his cock against her slit, her hips bucking in response.

“Beg me for it” he purred, his voice sending chills down her spine. 

“Please, Remus” she begged, pushing her hips forward to try to get him to enter.

“again” he said

“please…” 

“What is it that you want?” he smirked

“Remus just fuck me goddamnit!!” she roared, wriggling her hips.

His eyes flashed at her as he teased her for just a moment longer before pushing firmly into her. She inhaled sharply, he giving her that same intense gaze. 

“How is it that you are so fucking tight?” he said, thrusting into her. 

He pounded her harder than he ever had before, Mia was moaning so loud had their not been a silencing charm on the room she would’ve woken up the portrait of Mrs. Black. Remus felt the strong desire to bite her collarbone, her flesh looking so tender and delectable, but that was the only urge he fought off. He pounded her more, her breasts bouncing and her screams telling him she was just on the edge of release. 

“Come on, Mia!” he growled, her screams almost enough to push him over the edge. 

He felt her tighten around him after another 15 seconds, she cried out for him and her back arched furiously. Just in time for him, he released as well, gripping her hips hard, fighting the urge to dig his nails in. 

“Bloody hell” she whispered, sweat dripping from her and twitching from the aftershock of her orgasm. 

He kissed her neck gently as she panted, lingering for a moment at the crook, the urge to bite surging through him again. He stood up quickly, exercising extreme self-control. She sat up and watched him redress, a large grin spreading across her face. 

“So… that’s what I’ve been missing this close to the full moon? We should’ve been doing this a long time ago” she said slyly. 

To her surprise, Remus rounded on her and grabbed her shoulders. She winced at his unexpected tight grip. 

“This was dangerous” he hissed, his face just an inch from hers “you’re lucky I had some self-control today, because if not, I would’ve bitten you. Oh, I wanted to…” he growled, tracing the crook of her neck with his index finger. 

He let go of her with a soft shove and hastily grabbed his wolfsbane potion off the dresser. He unsealed the door and walked out, downing the potion in one big gulp. Mia sat on the bed for a minute unsettled. She knew he was aggressive and could have a temper this close to the moon, but hadn’t known him to have the urge to bite. She shook it off and grabbed her towel and bathrobe, slipping it on and headed off to the shower. She looked down at her torn tank top and bra, and sighed. She had liked that bra.


	27. chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kind of long chapter, but there was no good place to break it up!

Remus seemed much calmer at dinner that evening; Mia figured since he took his potion it was diminishing his behavior issues that always arose with the cycle. Her butt cheek was sore from where he had smacked her, so she had to sit awkwardly in her chair, which he gave her a sly sideways glance when he saw her adjust herself for the 12th time at the table. She let him know she had enjoyed their afternoon romp by rubbing his thigh inconspicuously under the table, smiling slightly when she felt him grow hard when she ‘accidentally’ brushed too close to his crotch. 

When sunset came around, he retreated into the cellar that Kingsley and Arthur designed to keep him in for transformations, sealed with a spell that once enacted, it couldn’t be broken until the moon set and the sun was up. Mia wished she could be with him, she told him multiple times she could keep him company as the white wolf, but he refused, just as he usually did. 

“It’s safer if I’m in there alone” he said, but she thought he was being daft, especially if he took his potion. 

The next morning, the group tasked with escorting the Weasleys and Hermione were gathering in the living room, getting ready to head out. Arthur and Kingsley were helping get Remus upstairs into bed to recover, and then they would be off.

“Now remember, if one of us is killed…” Moody started, lecturing everyone on safety protocol. 

Mia caught a glimpse of Remus as Kingsley and Arthur helped him hobble up the stairs. He gave her a small smile, but looked terrible. His eyes were bloodshot and looked weighed down by dark bags of sand, his skin was sallow, and his hair was disheveled. She wished she could ease the transformation for him; It took a lot out of him, and made him age prematurely due to the stress on his body. 

When the two men returned, everyone broke off into their groups. Bill and Moody were supposed to stay close to Mia, but out of sight just in case a Death Eater came around, they would think Mia and Hermione were alone and not get swarmed with a large group of them. Bill was to take Hermione’s things back to headquarters, retrieving them a couple minutes after they left, while Moody followed the ladies inconspicuously. When it was time, she gave a nod to Moody and thumbs up to Bill, closed her eyes and felt a tug just behind her navel.

When she opened her eyes, she was around the corner from the Granger’s house. She felt a flutter of nerves in her stomach when she saw that Bill and Moody were nowhere to be seen. She knew that was the plan, so she shook it off, reminding herself that Moody was overly cautious. She walked up to the front door and grabbed the door knocker, rasping 3 times. She took a step back and picked at her fingernails as a middle aged man with mousy brown hair opened the door. 

“Hello! You here to get Herm….” He began but Mia cut him off. 

“Yes sir, may I come in?”

Moody was strict about not letting anyone around hear that she was escorting Hermione anywhere. He had wanted it to appear as two girls simply walking around London, potentially just out for ice cream. She stepped inside, Mr. Granger closing the door behind her.

“I apologize, Mr. Granger, I didn’t mean to cut you off.” She said, giving him a polite smile. 

“No matter, Hermione said the witch or wizard that would be coming by to get her might be jumpy. You look so…” 

“My father is a muggle” Mia smiled, knowing he was referring to her very ‘normal’ jeans and led zeppelin t-shirt. “Amelia Roswell, but I go by Mia.” She said, sticking her right hand out to shake his. 

He gave her a firm handshake. “Pleasure, Mia, would you like anything to drink? A snack for the road?” he asked. 

“Oh no thank you, we’re expecting lunch when we return.” 

Mia heard a trunk bumping its way down the stairs as Hermione came into view. 

“Oh, Mia, I didn’t know it was you coming…” Hermione said, looking surprised to see her. 

“Hey. Bill will be coming to get your things in about 10 minutes. I hope your wearing decent walking shoes. We’ve got a hike ahead of us.”

The girls set off down the street, walking to the nearest bus stop. The only things they carried were their wands, hidden of course, and small purses. Bill was taking care of everything else; even though Hermione insisted she could carry some of her things as well. 

“Mad-eye wants us to look like a couple of normal girls headed out for shopping or whatever” Mia had told her as they were leaving. 

Standing and waiting at the bus stop, they were the only ones around. Mia scanned her surroundings, trying to see where Moody was hiding, but didn’t see him. 

“So… you joined the Order?” Hermione asked her.

“Yeah, I did.” Mia said casually. 

“What can you tell me about what’s going on?” 

“I can’t really tell you much. For one, Molly thinks you guys are too young to know everything, but things are quiet for now. We think he’s recruiting in secret, building his numbers.” Mia explained. 

Hermione knew ‘he’ was Voldemort, so she didn’t have to ask. 

“Harry has constant monitoring. I’ve actually got watch duty tomorrow.” 

“Dumbledore has asked us not to tell Harry anything-- not that Ron or I know much anyway. The Order is watching him?” Hermione asked. 

“He doesn’t blow his nose without us knowing about it. We’ve been keeping a very eye on him.” Mia said, looking at the red double decker bus that was pulling up. 

The girls entered the bus and situated themselves at the front; Mia scanning the bus for anyone she might think looked suspicious. Moody sat in the corner of bus, having entered just after the girls, in a large trench coat and a black bowler hat pulled low over his magical eye. The girls chatted about what Hermione did this summer, keeping it casual. Hermione was an intelligent witch, and knew Mia was keeping the conversation light in case there was anyone undesirable around that may be listening. 

When the girls exited the bus, Mia whispered to Hermione “Mad-eye is so paranoid; he’s close by watching us”. Hermione looked around furiously, but Mia grabbed her arm and dragged her along. “We’ve got 27 blocks, then we turn right, and it’s another 30. But that’s it at least” 

“Where are we going?” Hermione asked. 

“Headquarters” she said simply.

The girls turned a corner just a few blocks from 12 Grimmauld when a very dirty man with a bushy gray beard limped out from around a dumpster. 

“got a spare bit of change?” the man said, holding his hand out. 

His hands had on fingerless gloves that looked so dirty the color was indistinguishable. 

“No sorry…” Hermione said, looking sympathetic look as Mia grabbed her upper arm and drug her along. 

The man began to limping after them, his pace quickening. 

“Come back here you bitches!” the man growled, Mia holding tight to Hermione’s arm. 

The girls broke into a jog just as a flash of red light came out from seemingly nowhere, making the man drop to the ground. Mia took a deep breath.

“Thanks, Mad-Eye” she said quietly.

* * *

When Hermione and Mia arrived, it had taken them over an hour to take the bus system and walk to 12 Grimmauld place. Bill had already taken Hermione’s things upstairs to the bedroom that she would be sharing with Ginny. The Weasley children had arrived before them, and were settling themselves in. Mia was showing her around the house, letting her know where everything was. 

“There’s the kitchen and dining room down there, living room and parlor is through there, 2nd floor there’s a few bedrooms, your room is up on the 3rd floor though…” Mia explained. 

“Girls, can you spread the word that dinner is in 20?” Molly called from the door to the kitchen. 

Mia gave her thumbs up, and they kept walking. When they reached the landing of the second floor, she turned and whispered to Hermione

“Just keep your voice down in halls”. 

“Why?”

Just as she asked this, Tonks kicked the umbrella stand in the entry way, causing a loud bang. 

The curtain on Mrs. Black’s portrait flew open, and she and the other paintings began screaming. 

**“Mudbloods! Blood Traitors! Half Breeds!”**

Sirius came running out of one of the bedrooms, yelling “Oh shut it you old hag!” and was forcing the curtains closed. 

“Goddamnit Tonks” Mia said under her breath, chuckling. “She’s a total klutz”

The girls continued up the staircase to the 3rd floor, where the sounds of Fred and George taunting Ron came into earshot. Mia poked her head inside the bedroom that Ron and Harry were going to share, seeing Fred and George tossing something of Ron’s back and forth over his head, as Ron tried to furiously grab it. 

“Oi, tweedle dee and tweedle dumb” Mia called at them. 

Fred and George stopped and grinned at her. 

“Mia! We didn’t know you were in the Order.” Fred said. 

“Yes and your mother asked me to send you two downstairs.” She said, winking at Ron. 

They gave Ron back what she could now see as a chocolate frog box, and they left. Ron grumbled as the twins apparated with a loud crack downstairs. 

“Thanks” he huffed. 

Mia nodded at him and the girls walked to the next bedroom, finding Ginny unpacking some clothes. 

“Hey, Hermione” She said with a wide smile. “Mia, I didn’t know you’d be here.” 

“Yeah, I’m in the Order” Mia said, leaning against the doorframe. 

“So you can tell us what’s going on, right??” Ginny asked eagerly. 

“If I want to face the wrath of your mother, not everything, but I’ll see what I can do.” Mia said, winking at her. 

“When is Harry getting here??” Ginny pressed her for as much information as she could get. 

“Next week maybe, I’m on watch duty for him tomorrow, were formulating a plan to get him here safely. Your mother says dinner is in 20 minutes, I’ll see you guys downstairs”

Mia trotted down the stairs to the second floor, and rounded the corner in the hallway to see how Remus was getting along. She walked in the room to find him chatting with Arthur. She felt a slight jolt of disappointment to see he wasn’t alone, not getting the chance to speak with him much since the day before. 

“Hey, sorry I hope I’m not interrupting…” she said. 

“No, not at all,” Arthur said with a warm smile. “Any chance you know how long until dinner?”

“20 minutes” Mia said, situating herself on the edge of the bed. 

She looked at Remus, he was sitting up well and his eyes looked far less bloodshot. 

“Fabulous, Molly is making lasagna. It’s one of her best” Arthur beamed. 

“Sounds amazing, I’m starving” Remus said, swinging his feet around to stand up. 

Arthur helped him stand, letting Remus use his shoulder to balance. 

“I’ll go down and make your plate” Mia said smiling at him, skipping out of the room. 

“She’s a sweet girl, Remus” Arthur said as they were following the same path out. 

“Yeah, I don’t deserve her” Remus chuckled. 

Arthur stopped at looked at him with a serious expression. “Yes, you do. You deserve someone like her. Don’t sell yourself short.” 

* * *

Arthur helped Remus to the table where Mia had already fixed his plate of lasagna. She was bobbing around the kitchen, already steeping his cup of earl grey tea, and fixing a glass of water. Mia brought over his drinks and sat down next to him, handing him a vial of pain potion that she pulled out of her pocket. 

“Thanks” he mumbled to her, smiling. 

“5 star service” Arthur chuckled, situating himself next to Molly. 

Hermione was eyeing Mia and Remus, picking up on how helpful she seemed towards him. Ron was digging into his lasagna like he’d never eaten before, sauce splashing all over his face and down the front of his sweater. 

“Ron, honestly…!” Hermione hissed at him, her eyes narrowing and nose turning up. 

“wha’?” he said, mouth so full the word was barely audible. 

Fred and George sat at the very end of the table, whispering back and forth to each other. This raised Molly’s suspicions as to what the twins were up to, not wasting anytime to holler at them across the table. 

“You two are being awful quiet over there; if I find any of those wretched dung bombs today you will be scrubbing toilets until you go back to school!” 

Mia stifled a giggle, knowing full well that the twins would not be afraid of this threat, and were probably planning the trick on their mother. 

“Tomorrow is Harry’s birthday” Hermione said to the whole table. “Will he be joining us here then, or…?” 

“No, not yet, were still working out those details.” Arthur told her. 

Hermione and Ginny looked disappointed, Ron’s expression unchanged as he plowed into another piece of lasagna. 

“I go’ ‘im some ‘oney-ooks ‘ocoat” he said as he ate. 

“What was that Ronnie?” George said laughing. 

“He said he got him Honeydukes chocolate, as did I. Seriously Ronald, can you chew your food?” Hermione scolded. “We’re going to send it to him tomorrow morning.” 

“I’m sure he’ll appreciate that” Remus said, giving Hermione a kind smile. 

“He’s been watching the muggle news every day; his aunt and uncle find it strange” Mia said. 

“I bet he’s looking for any news that may be related to Voldemort’s return; disappearances, murders, things of that sort.” Hermione said as she looked down at her lasagna sadly.

The entire table was quiet, Mia felt instantly sad for Harry. She couldn’t imagine herself at 15 having to go through what he was.

* * *

On the afternoon of August 2nd, Headquarters erupted in chaos. News of a dementor attack on Harry caused the Weasley children and Hermione to panic, and sent Sirius, Molly and Dumbledore in an uproar. Mia couldn’t tell who was more upset, but all their anger was directed at Mundungus Fletcher. He had skipped out on guard duty early to purchase stolen cauldrons, leaving Harry unattended and forced to use the patronus charm to save him and his cousin, the Ministry catching wind right away due to the trace on underage wizards. Molly hated Mundungus, Mia didn’t think it was possible for her to loathe him anymore than she had, but after this, she was proven wrong. 

“I would’ve covered the rest of his shift had he asked…” Tonks had said to her and Remus, looking irritated at Mundungus’s lack of common sense. 

Dumbledore swept in thankfully and got Harry a trial, but everyone in the Order knew that Fudge wanted nothing more than to expel Harry from Hogwarts to keep him from spreading news that Voldemort was back. 

It took the Order another few days to fine tune the plan to move Harry from 4 Privet Drive to 12 Grimmauld place. Mia had decided to stay back at Headquarters to keep Sirius company during this, as he had been increasingly getting grumpier by the day due to feeling useless for the organization. This seemed better than joining the Rear Guard, which would swoop in and fight in case the Advance Guard that was escorting Harry got ambushed. Seeing as how Susan was leading the Rear, Mia didn’t want to have to spend any extra time with her mother than she had to. 

When Harry arrived, he was shooed off upstairs to find his bedroom while the Order members had a meeting. This meeting was the first time Mia had been in the same room with Susan for more than 5 minutes since the first meeting, and the tension was thick between them. Susan made it a point not to look in her and Remus’s direction, eyes transfixed on Dumbledore the entire time. 

When the meeting was over, Mia quickly volunteered to go upstairs to retrieve the teens for dinner, praying when she returned to the kitchen Susan would not be there.

“Mia? What’re you doing here?” Harry asked, surprised. 

“She’s in the Order!” Fred replied before Mia got the chance to speak. 

“Her mum is too, Susan, too intense for her own good; doesn’t fancy our dung bombs” said George, grinning at Mia when he said this. 

Mia chuckled, knowing very well that the twins had gotten an earful about their pranks from not only Molly, but Susan as well.

“Dinner is ready, your mum says hurry up” Mia winked, and exited the room. 

She and Remus hadn’t told any of the kids that they were together, she was waiting for one of them to ask or Remus to say something first. She had caught Hermione exchange a glance or two at them a few times during meals, but had never asked her about it. She received another glance from her when she brought Remus his cup of tea to the table, sitting down next to him like she always did. 

“How are you feeling, Harry?” Remus asked him, referring to his impending trial. 

“Ok, I guess” he muttered, unsure of how to feel. His trial was in the morning, and everyone was on edge with anticipation. 

“Just remember, the law is on your side, Harry” Remus said to him, attempting to give him a reassured smile. 

“You should just tell ol’ Fudge he can suck his own…” Mia started, but Remus cut her off 

“Mia!” he shot her a glaring expression, then turned back to Harry. “No, I wouldn’t give any cheek, especially with the stakes of this trial.” 

“I won’t” Harry said, taking a sip of his tea. 

“Fine, I’ll tell him myself” Mia said snottily, mostly to herself. 

“And when will you be seeing the Minister of Magic?” Remus teased with a hint of a chuckle. 

“I’ll send him an anonymous howler” she said, sounding quite matter of fact. 

“No, you won’t” Remus snickered. 

“Remus you are no fun.” She spat “Sirius would find it funny, and _encourage_ me to speak my mind” 

“He would, which is why I am the voice of reason between us” 

The three of them laughed, but Harry still looked uneasy. 

“You’re going to be fine, I can feel it.” Mia winked at him, getting up from the table and retreating out of the room. 

Remus watched her leave the room with a small smile on his face, which Harry found peculiar. 

“You will do fine, but honestly, don’t tell Fudge to suck his…” Remus started but Harry held his hand up to stop him from finishing his sentence. 

“Don’t worry, really, I won’t” He said, managing a laugh. 

* * *

News that Harry was cleared of all charges was a relief to everyone. The Weasley children, Harry and Hermione were spending the rest of the summer holiday at Headquarters, to be escorted to Kings Cross by the Order to ensure the safety of Harry and his friends. Most of the time spent before sending the kids off to school was spent cleaning and de-creaturing the house, putting them to work as they awaited their school lists to arrive via owl. Remus had to run out on small missions for Dumbledore quite a bit, but Mia usually volunteered to stay back and help Molly and Sirius with the house work. She noticed how depressed Sirius seemed to get about not being more helpful for the Order, and she wanted to lift his spirits by keeping her friend company.

One night at dinner, Mia noticed Tonks making eyes again at Kingsley. 

“I bet you 10 galleons they are fucking by Christmas” Mia had whispered to him. 

“Nah… Tonks and Kingsley?” Sirius said in disbelief. 

Mia raised her eyebrows and held out her right hand to shake on it.

Sirius grinned and shook her hand furiously “get ready to pay up, kitten”.

* * *

Mia and Sirius were thick as thieves; they even started trying to prank Fred and George for entertainment, which drove Molly mad. Wherever Sirius was, Mia seemed to be right around the corner, and vice versa. Their friendship was stirring questions amongst the teens, curious to how Sirius and Mia seemed so close. 

“Do you reckon there’s something going on with Mia and Sirius?” Harry had asked the group while they were getting ready to head downstairs for breakfast one morning.

“Sirius and Mia? Nahh, there’s no way” Ron said through mouthfuls of his licorice wand he was consuming. 

“Ron you are going to spoil your breakfast” Hermione snapped. 

“I know there’s the bedroom on the second floor that she stays in, but I’m pretty sure I’ve seen Lupin come and go out of there, not Sirius.” Ginny interjected 

“She seems so close with Sirius though…” Harry said, perplexed

“Well, yes…” Hermione started again, “Harry, remember when we helped him escape, she had obviously known Sirius for longer than we had, but didn’t tell us how she knew him. Sirius told her ‘make sure he takes care of you’. Maybe he was talking about Professor Lupin”

“I don’t believe it!” Ron interjected through another mouthful. 

“You think they were together while she was a student??” Harry asked, surprised. 

“It would make sense” Hermione shrugged. “She is very helpful to him; bringing him cups of coffee in the mornings, making his dinner plate for him. I’ve seen him take her plate to the sink also, but he doesn’t ever take anyone else’s.” 

Harry thought back to that year at school, he did run into Mia coming and going from Remus’ office that year more than any other student, and he remembered the tense conversation he walked in on the last day of term. 

“It does make sense, she does call him by his first name too, despite being her teacher at one point.” he said softly. 

“Why don’t we just ask them?” Ginny said rolling her eyes. 

They were interrupted and side-tracked by a loud crack, Fred and George suddenly standing in front of them. “School letters!” they cried in unison, passing out everyone’s envelopes.

* * *

News that Ron and Hermione were made prefects travelled fast, Molly was beaming with pride when she learned her son had been chosen. Remus was reminiscing at breakfast with Sirius about the day he had been made prefect over his friends, Sirius claiming he never wanted the badge. Mia couldn’t help but sneak a few glances at Harry in the whirlwind of congratulations everyone was giving Ron and Hermione. Mia knew how it felt to have her best friend chosen for Prefect over instead of her, and she could tell by a couple of Harry’s facial expressions he was trying hard to conceal his disappointment.

That night, Molly had thrown an impromptu party to celebrate, many Order members coming by to enjoy some mingling and appetizers she had prepared. Susan and Kingsley came together after work, Susan giving both Ron and Hermione big handshakes, telling them 

“Congratulations, it’s truly an honor to be chosen as prefect…” 

Mia rolled her eyes at overhearing this from across the room, remembering how disappointed her mother was when she opened her 5th year school envelope that didn’t contain a prefect’s badge. Susan walked by Mia and gave her a forced smile, which she was sure, was a show for Kingsley. 

“Hello, Mia dear” she said, giving her a stiff hug. 

“Hi mum” Mia replied, forcing herself to be cordial. 

Just as they broke their awkward hug, Remus had walked up and was shaking hands with Kingsley. 

“Remus.” Susan said curtly, giving him a slight nod. 

She looked as if she had dung smeared under her nose, a similar expression that Severus Snape wore on the regular. 

“Susan” Remus nodded back, giving her a small smile. 

Susan didn’t say anything else, but made her way over to where Molly had laid out trays of food. There was a large banner hung that said **‘Congratulations Ron and Hermione, prefects’** that was stuck to the far wall of the kitchen. Mia noticed Harry lingering alone on the outskirts of the crowd, and excused herself from Remus and Kingsley’s conversation of scotch they had gotten deep into. She grabbed two slices of cheesecake from the dessert table Molly had laid out, and trotted over to him.

“Look alive, Potter” she said with a grin, coming up to him by his side and playfully bumping his shoulder with hers. 

“Hey, Mia” he said with a forced smile. 

“Here, have some cheesecake” she said, handing him one of the small plates.

He took the plate and opened his mouth to thank her, but she cut him off.

“How are you doing with Ron making prefect over you?” she asked frankly. 

“Oh, its fine, I’m really happy for him. It’s great, honestly” Harry exclaimed with a big smile, but Mia saw right through him.

“It’s ok to feel disappointed.” She said though a large bite of dessert.

“I’m not, honestly, he deserves it way more than me” he said again, his happy tone forced. 

“When Penelope made prefect over me, I felt like I got punched in the gut. Part of it was that my mum was furious I didn’t make prefect and follow in her footsteps, but it was really hard to be happy at first. I was very jealous. It got easier though at least.” Mia said truthfully. 

Harry’s body language relaxed at hearing this. 

“Who am I to think I’m better than Ron and should’ve gotten it” he said quietly. 

“A human being” Mia laughed, Harry chuckling with her. “It’ll get easier, Harry. Plus, the prefect bathroom is amazing and they may let you use it once or twice.” 

“Cedric let me use it to work out a clue for the tri-wizard tournament last year, it was amazing” Harry said, his face falling after making reference to Cedric. 

Mia didn’t ask him about Cedric, knowing that was probably the last thing he wanted to talk about, but clasped a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. 

“Mia, can I ask you something?” Harry said after a moment of silence. 

She nodded at him. 

“Is there something going on between you and Professor Lupin?” he asked. 

“Yes.” She chuckled. “I wasn’t sure if Remus told you or not”

“How long has that been happening?” he asked, thinking he already knew the answer. 

Mia let out a bark of laughter, mouth full of cheesecake. “Oh, a while; you actually walked in on him breaking up with me at the end of term” she smirked. “To tell you the truth Harry, Remus and I had a relationship while I was his student. I met Sirius through him, during the months that he was hiding in Remus’ office. That’s how I knew him so well when we helped him escape.” 

Mia smiled at remembering the fun times she had visiting with him and Sirius during that year. 

“I hope this doesn’t make you think any less of Remus. He is a good man with a good conscience. I don’t think he would’ve pursued me on his own, because of ethics.” 

“No, it doesn’t actually” Harry said. “You seem so close with Sirius though…” 

“I am. Sirius is my best friend.” Mia said very matter of fact. “We’re friendly, but I’m not double dipping, by any means”

Harry let out a gentle laugh, giving her a half smile. “Thanks”

“For not double dipping with your godfather and teacher??” she crinkled her nose

“No, for the pep talk” Harry grinned

“Any time; Come on, let’s get more cheesecake; I fucking love that shit” she winked, motioning him to join her by the snack table.

* * *

When September the 1st rolled around, Mia had made her way downstairs to find Sirius sitting by the door, wagging his tail. 

“Sirius, Mad-Eye said no!” she said, and his tail stopped wagging. 

He proceeded to whine, lying down stubbornly. He was hoping to be able to accompany Harry and the others to Kings Cross as the shaggy black dog, but Moody had been adamant on him remaining at headquarters. Mia rolled her eyes at him, and when Molly walked into the entrance way with the other Order Members and kids, she scolded the dog as well. After a moment of him not budging, she hissed “oh fine, it’s your head on a platter if you get caught”. 

Moody was furious when Sturgis Podmore didn’t show up to escort the kids to Kings Cross, but they had no issues thankfully with getting them there safely. Mia’s heart broke when she saw Sirius running after the train, barking madly at Harry until the train was around the corner and out of sight. She knew how much Sirius loved having Harry in his life, and in some selfish way was hoping he would’ve had to stay back with him at 12 Grimmauld Place. Mia wrapped her arm around Remus’s torso, watching Sirius retreating back over to the group. 

“You think he’s going to be ok?” she asked. 

“I think so” he replied quietly, looking down at her with a reassuring smile. 

“I have to work with Penelope today” Mia said flatly, changing the subject. 

“How are you two?” Remus asked, figuring he already knew the answer. 

“We’re polite.” She said, beginning to pick at her fingernails. “I should apologize, shouldn’t I…?” 

Mia hated being wrong, she knew she had overreacted, but didn’t want to admit it. 

“Yes, you should” Remus said frankly. 

Mia shot an irritated glance up at him. He chuckled at her and kissed her forehead. 

“You hate to admit you are wrong, I know, but you shouldn’t push your best friend away because of pride. Pride isn’t always an admirable trait. Humble yourself and apologize, she’ll accept it.” 

“And if she doesn’t?” Mia sneered, irritable that Remus was playing the logical, cool as a cucumber mediator that Penelope had always been for her. 

“She will.” He said simply. “Come on, you want to grab lunch before your shift?” 

Mia paused for a moment, looking around at the Order Members beginning to disperse and disappear back through the barrier from platform 9 ¾. She caught sight of her mother, who gave them a distasteful look as she stepped through the barrier. Mia sighed, knowing she was doing the same thing to Penelope as Susan was doing to her and Remus was irritating, and she didn’t want to be stubborn and cold like her mother. 

“Yeah, let’s go.” She said, giving his torso a little squeeze before letting go. 

He watched her walk through the barrier first, and then he joined her on the other side, taking her hand and smiling down at her.

* * *

Mia walked into work, grabbing her time card silently and punching the clock. Penelope was on a ladder in the front of the store, stocking the shelf of Rieslings imported from America. 

“Hey, Penny, can I talk with you for a moment?” She asked quietly, looking up the ladder at her. 

“Give me a minute. Ask Bruce to cover the register for you.” Penelope said flatly, not looking down at Mia. 

“Sure, thanks.” Mia mumbled, and went to find the kind old man named Bruce to sit by the register for few minutes. 

Mia liked Bruce; he worked there out of boredom in his retirement, and loved to show Mia pictures of his 15 grandchildren. He was known by the employees as the store’s grandfather. Mia went back into the manager’s office in the back of the shop, and leaned against the desk, picking her fingernails. It was maybe only a minute before Penelope had made her way back into the office, but it felt like ages to Mia, feeling anxious about talking to her. 

“What can I do for you?” She asked in a very professional tone.

Mia looked at her with a sad expression. 

“I… am not good at this stuff.” Mia said, furiously picking at her left index finger. 

“Not good with what?” Penelope asked.

Mia was unsure if Penelope was playing stupid for the sake of it, or if she truly didn’t know what she wanted to talk to her about. 

“I’m… sorry” 

The word sorry came out sounding overly enunciated, as if it was not in her normal vocabulary. 

“For?” Penelope asked, her hand making her way to her hip. 

“Being an asshole” Mia said quietly. 

Penelope’s eyebrow raised, but said nothing. 

“I was wrong, ok? God, I hate admitting I’m wrong” 

Mia was doing a number to her left index finger; her cuticle was bleeding slightly where she was picking. 

“I shouldn’t’ve gotten upset at you for not joining the Order, it’s your right to choose whether you want to fight or not, and I just got carried away with the excitement of being in it together that I didn’t even think that you might not be able to join.” 

Penelope softened her posture, and gave Mia a sad smile, “And I’m sorry I wouldn’t join. I know it disappointed you.” 

Mia looked up quickly “Pen, you don’t have to apologize, I’m in the wrong here” 

“I’ve been just as much of an asshole to you the past couple months as you have to me. We’re both wrong.” Penelope said calmly, walking over and hugging Mia. “Can we just be friends again?” she whispered. 

“I’d like that” Mia said tears stinging her eyes. 

They broke their embrace and linked arms, walking back to the front of the store. 

“It’s about time you two finally made up!” Bruce said jovially, his eyes twinkling with happiness to see the girls in good spirits. 

Mia grinned as well; it felt good to have her friend back


	28. chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a joke mid chapter that depending on where you are from, you might not understand it. I'll explain it in the notes at the end, because I thought it was hilarious.
> 
> However, I was once told that jokes aren't funny when you have to explain it? ehhh whatever, it gave me a laugh :)

Dueling training for the Order took place the next day in the backyard of 12 Grimmauld Place. Remus, Molly and Sirius had cast a few concealment and shielding charms around the back yard, to make them invisible to anyone on the outside. Everyone seemed in decent spirits despite news of Sturgis Podmore being arrested at the Ministry the night before they escorted the kids to Kings Cross. He was caught at 1am near the Department of Mysteries, and couldn’t explain why he was sneaking around the Ministry in the middle of the night. 

Mia watched anxiously as Bill and Kingsley dueled first, feeling like she had something to prove being one of the younger members of the Order. They had set of chairs placed around the dueling area Sirius had made, Susan choosing to sit on the very end of one side, giving Mia glaring looks every few moments or so. She tried not to look in her mother’s direction, not wanting to deal with her attitude towards her and Remus today. Remus and Sirius were enthralled in the match between Kingsley and Bill, cheering them on and whooping loudly when Bill hit him with a stinging jinx. 

“Nice one Bill!” Sirius called, clapping his hands furiously. 

Bill was distracted by his cheerleaders, leaving Kingsley to send him flying in the air. 

“Sorry, Weasley” Kingsley chuckled, his voice deep as a bass drum. 

“Good match, Shacklebolt. That’ll teach me to keep my head in the game” Bill said, shaking Kingsley’s hand as he pulled him to his feet. 

Tonks was grinning furiously at Kingsley; Mia was almost certain she saw him wink at her. 

“Next up, Mia and Sirius!”

Sirius jumped to his feet and grinned widely. Mia stood up, her shoulders hunched with self-consciousness. She felt like she was on display in front of the Order, and was worried she’d prove herself weak. She positioned herself across from Sirius, Remus stepping behind her and putting his hands on her shoulders. 

“Sirius likes to be flashy in his duels. His bravado is his weakness, use that to your strength” Remus said quietly, leaning near her ear so only she heard him. 

Mia caught a sour glance from Susan, making her roll her eyes. Mia nodded to him and swallowed hard. 

“You can do this, Mia. It’s just like dueling club. Ignore your mother.” Remus whispered, giving her shoulders a squeeze. 

She took a deep breath and readied her wand. 

“Ready?” Sirius gleamed, excited to show off. 

“Let’s do this” she breathed, bowing to him. 

He gave a rather flourishing bow, and brought his wand up to position. 

“Ok, ready? GO!” Tonks called. 

“Tarantallegra!” Sirius cried, but Mia was quicker and threw up her shield charm. 

Flashes of light were erupting from both of their wands, Mia feeling more at ease as the duel continued. Her reflexes her quick and she was able to focus on Sirius alone, blocking out Susan’s scowls and the cheers from the other Order members. Sirius did quite a bit of wand flourishing when he cast his spells, which Mia noticed took him an extra half second on some of his spells. She started watching his pattern as she continuously blocked his spells, throwing up shield after shield. 

“Come on kitten, is that all you got?” he yelled, sending another nonverbal jinx at her. 

She watched his flourish pattern, and when she saw the opportunity to strike, she took it. 

“Confringo!” she yelled quickly, and Sirius was flown back. 

“Incarcerous!” she cried again, and Sirius was bound by ropes that flew from Mia’s wand. 

The Order members cheered, Remus loudest of all. Susan crossed her arms and pursed her lips. 

“Take that, Padfoot” Mia giggled, waving her wand to unbind Sirius. 

She helped him up, he giving her a warm smile. 

“Nice work, you kicked my ass back there” he winked, wrapping his arm over her shoulder and walking over to the chairs on the right side of the dueling track. Remus came and sat down next to her, and kissed her forehead. 

“Well done” he said, his eyes twinkling. 

“Ok, Remus and Susan, you two next!” Tonks called. 

Susan and Remus locked eyes, the tension between them thick. 

“I’ve never seen your mother lose a duel, Remus has his work cut out for him” Sirius whispered in Mia’s ear.

Silence fell over the group as they took their places on the dueling track, Remus giving a humble bow. Susan bowed as well, the expression on her face looked as if she had dung smeared under her nose. Her chest felt tight with anxiety and disdain as she looked at him, his blue eyes returning nothing but a warm kindness. It made her dislike him more. 

“Ok, ready? GO!” Tonks called, and flashes of light erupted from their wands. 

Both were sending spell after spell, the duel growing intense. Susan was dueling with all her fury, her emotions towards Remus letting loose. She was sending every nasty jinx, hex or charm at him, hoping to leave him with a face of boils or vomiting slugs. He watched her intently as he shielded her jinxes, looking for patterns or weaknesses. He smirked to himself when he saw a similarity in the way she dueled compared to Mia, leaving her left side ever so slightly open to get hit. He increased his spell speed, sending a stunning charm her quicker than she had. The spell clipped her left side, and she felt backwards. 

“Expelliarmus!” Remus cried, her wand flying out of her hand to his. 

Susan pushed herself to seated position, her body feeling like pins and needles.

“You leave your left side open to sneak in a jinx the way you position your hips, Mia used to do the same thing.” Remus said, kneeling next to her and returning her wand. 

“I’m not sure I know what you mean” Susan said coolly, turning her nose up. 

“I’ll show you.” He said. 

When she was able to stand, he took a few minutes to explain her hip stance, and showed her how to correct it. Susan took this information well, and muttered a monotone “thanks”. 

Remus returned to Mia and Sirius on the sidelines, Sirius clasping a hand on his shoulder and shaking him gently, telling him a job well done. Mia beamed up at him, impressed with how he handled himself in a duel with her mother. Susan looked at the three of them from the other side of the dueling track, watching Mia and Remus intently; Mia looked happier than Susan had ever realized. The way he looked at her it was obvious he was enamored with her. His eyes sparkled when he saw her smile, her entire face lighting up with joyfulness as she spoke with him. Susan felt the tightness in her chest soften; she only wanted her daughter to be happy, and maybe she had overlooked that she was.

* * *

Mia woke on her birthday to a beautiful bouquet of red and white flowers on her dresser. She sat up to see Remus standing in front of the mirror, who was observing his hair intently. He loathed the many more grays that seemed to be multiplying every full moon. She wasn’t expecting to see him this early, she had stayed over at her flat the night before to have a girl’s night with Penelope. When he saw she was awake, he turned around and smiled at her. 

“Happy birthday” he said, walking over to her and kissing her. “Penelope let me in. She wanted me to tell you she left for work early, but she says happy birthday as well” 

“Thank you” she smiled “those for me?” 

She outstretched her hands in the direction of the bouquet, Remus picking it up and bringing it to her. She closed her eyes and sniffed the flowers, enjoying the soft aroma. They were a beautiful assortment of roses, white hydrangeas, and lilies, all whose petals were velvety soft. 

“They’re beautiful, Remus. I love them. Thank you” 

She handed the vase back to him, who set it back in its spot on the dresser, and sat on the edge of the bed. 

“They’re not much, but I thought you would like them.” 

“Come here” she said as she stretched her arms out to him. 

He sat next to her on the bed and she ruffled his hair. 

“You look handsome with gray hair” she told him, and gave him a peck on the lips. 

“That’s curious, because I was just thinking the opposite” he said with a cynical laugh. 

“You think wrong, I think you’re the most handsome man I’ve ever laid eyes on.” she said playfully, poking him in the ribs.

It tickled where she poked him, so he grabbed her began tickling her furiously. Mia squealed with laughter, trying to tickle him back to get him to stop. They wrestled around for a couple minutes, laughing until their sides hurt. When they couldn’t take any more, they curled up next to each other, Mia resting her head in the crook of Remus’s shoulder, tracing circles on his chest.

“I want you to meet my dad” she said after a few moments of silence. 

“Your dad?” he asked, sitting up slightly. 

“Yeah, I’m having dinner with him for my birthday. Will you come? I’ll call him and tell him your coming.” 

Mia looked up at Remus with a hopeful expression. 

“Technically I’ve met your father before” Remus chuckled. 

“And he obviously doesn’t remember you” Mia rolled her eyes at him. 

“Do you think your dad will react the way your mum did?” he asked, with a slight nervous expression. “Because, I’m, you know… older?” 

Mia shrugged “I have no idea. I won’t tell him you were my teacher” she winked hopping out of bed. 

“Please don’t…” he said with a soft snicker. 

“Sooo, you’ll come?” she asked, her eyes glimmered with the excitement of a child asking if they could have an ice cream cone at a local fair. 

“If you want me there, I will be there” Remus said warmly. 

“I’ll go call him!” Mia grinned excitedly. 

Remus stood up and stretched, hearing a faint “Lt. Colonel John Roswell, US Air Force please” coming from the kitchen. He walked out into the living room of the flat, looking at Mia pacing by the phone, twirling the cord between her fingers. Remus thought she looked beautiful with her hair in a messy bun, standing there in plain gray panties and a black tank top. Her calves flexed as she raised herself up on her tip toes, then back down again. She was alluring; he couldn’t help but stare as she waited for her call to connect.

“John Roswell” a clipped, deep male voice said over the phone.

“Daddy? It’s Mia”

“Hey kiddo! Happy Birthday! I’m excited for dinner tonight” John said, his voice brightening.

“Yeah, me too, that’s why I was calling actually. I was wondering if I could bring a guest.” “Sure, is it your friend Penelope? She seems like a nice girl.” John asked; his Midwestern American accent almost twangy.

“uhm, no, it’s my, uh, boyfriend; Remus.” Mia said awkwardly. 

“Boyfriend?” John replied, his tone stiffening.

“Yes” Mia twirled the phone cord anxiously.

“Well, yes, I’d love to meet the young man. Remus, you say? What a strange name.” John said after a moment. 

“It’s a family name. Listen, Dad, he looks a lot older than he is, bad genetics.” Mia said hastily, giving Remus a sympathetic grin, who returned a mime of him pretending that her words hurt him. “Just promise me you’ll be nice”

“I’ll be nice, but I’ll be giving him the ol’ John Roswell dating questionnaire over appetizers”

“Bye Dad, see you tonight” she said with a slight chuckle, rolling her eyes.

“Bye sweetie, see you and this Remus fellow soon.”

Mia waited until she heard the click on the other end before hanging up the phone. She was hoping John’s reaction to Remus would be much better than Susan’s.

“Bad genetics?” Remus said playfully, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Well, it was better than ‘Remus is a werewolf and it makes his hair gray faster” she snorted with laughter. “You’ll need your ID.”

"ID?” He asked with a hint of confusion.

“Yeah, your muggle ID; you need it to get on base” she repeated casually, clanging the kettle onto the stove to brew them some fresh tea.

“I don’t have a muggle ID…” he said slowly. 

Mia turned around and looked at him with an awestruck gaze, but then softened when she remembered that it wasn’t normal to have to lie and pretend you were a normal muggle to a parent. 

“Well, we’ll have to get you one today. Any chance you have a birth certificate?” she asked, figuring she knew the answer. 

He shook his head, and she rolled her eyes at him “wizards.”

* * *

Mia and Remus spent part of the morning getting his identification papers in order. Mia charmed a couple pieces of parchment to assume the look that Remus had proper muggle paperwork to obtain an ID. She had him put her address as his residence, and his picture turned out as great as most people’s ID- not well.

“One, this picture doesn’t even move, and two, this picture is hideous” he said as they were walking down the street, he observing his ID carefully.

“Everyone’s picture sucks” she laughed “here, look at mine”

Remus observed her ID carefully. “Your picture is beautiful!” he exclaimed in frustration.

“Shut up” she snorted playfully. 

They walked up to a charming little house with a large front porch and planters of flowers framing the porch stairs. Mia grabbed a key from her key ring and unlocked the door, walking in. Remus looked at her puzzled, for which she responded casually “neighbors are muggles”. They had arrived at Susan’s house, Mia insisting they needed to borrow ‘the jag’ for their trip. Remus wasn’t sure was this meant, and when he asked she gave him a look that insinuated he was an idiot.

“Mum! I’m taking the jag to see dad!” she hollered, and the sound of footsteps thundered down the stairs.

“I don’t like you taking that expensive car! You don’t drive enough and you might get into a wreck!” Susan called as she came down the stairs.

“Mum, I’ll be fine. I promise.” She said grinning. 

Susan stopped in her tracks when she saw Remus standing in the foyer of the house. She and him locked eyes for a moment, tension building.

“Oh, hello Remus.” She said curtly.

“Hi Susan” he replied politely.

“I’m taking Remus to meet Dad” Mia said, a slight sneer in her voice.

Susan’s lips pursed at this, Remus wasn’t sure if Susan was thinking the dinner wasn’t going to go well, or if Susan was irritated he was going in the first place.

“My ex-husband doesn’t know of our world, Remus, as I hope you remember. Mind your tongue while you are there.” Susan said coldly. “And Amelia, happy birthday, but I better not receive a call that you crashed that very expensive car of mine.”

Mia rolled her eyes “yes mum. I’ll be careful. Come on, let’s go”

She motioned to Remus to exit the house, but he turned to look at Susan one more time.

“It was nice seeing you, Susan” he said warmly. 

Susan didn’t say anything, her lips pursed again but she gave him a slight nod, and then retreated back up the stairs. They walked out the front door, down the porch and around the house to the detached garage that was nestled in a blanket of bushes. Mia opened a small box on the trim of the garage door, punched in a code, and it began to open. 

“It was nice seeing you, Susan” she said mockingly, giving him a maniacal grin.

“What?” he laughed, and then looked awestruck when a handsome black car came into view. “Is this, the ‘jag’? Or whatever?”

“Yeah, a Jaguar” she said with an eye roll. “Get in”

* * *

Mia was driving down the road while Remus was opening and closing compartments, unsure of what to make of this car. He hadn’t been inside a car other than Arthur’s Ford Anglia since he was a very small child, which wasn’t anywhere as nice as this one.

“How do you know how to drive this thing?” He asked, watching the muggles pass by as they drove.

“I learned” she said sarcastically “My dad taught me when I was 16. Spent the whole summer learning; every muggle teenager learns to drive. Pretty cool because the driving age was lower in America than in Britain”

Remus thought this interesting; Mia never really talked much about her time in America on holiday breaks, but hearing things like this made him wonder if she felt like she lived a double life at times. They drove for a few minutes until they reached the vast structure that was the Air Force base, big enough to house the Royal Air force and the US air force in one facility. Mia pulled the car up to a handsome young blonde gentleman in uniform, handing him her and Remus’ ID cards. 

“What’s your business on base today?” the airman asked, his American accent was similar to John’s.

“Amelia Roswell and Remus Lupin, here to see Lt. Colonel John Roswell with the US Air force.” She said politely, giving the airman a friendly smile. 

The airman flashed a smile back at her, Remus’ insides crawling with irritation. He knew what type of smile he was giving her.

“You must be his daughter” the airman said, leaning on the car to get a closer look at her.

“Yes, visiting him for my birthday.” She said, her tone was polite and friendly.

“ah, well, Happy birthday” he said, smirking slightly as he glanced back down at their ID cards before handing them back to her.

“Thank you” she said, nodding her head, reminding herself to be polite and not roll her eyes. She didn’t want to make her father look bad by being rude.

“Sure thing, Amelia. You know where to park?” the airman said “if not I can escort you myself”

The airman’s words were dripping with sweetness; Remus could’ve sworn he saw his pearly white teeth sparkle. He fought the irritation begging to break through the surface with all his might.

“Mia. And yes, I know where visitor parking is, Airman…” she paused to look at his uniform tag “Richardson”

“Senior Airman Richardson” The airman gleamed with pride. “Sweet ride, by the way.”

He winked at her as she drove through the gates to the visitor parking lot.

“What a wanker!” she laughed “did you see the way he was looking at me?”

“Oh, yes” Remus replied cooly.

Mia’s face felt hot as she pulled into a parking spot. “Now you stop that, Remus Lupin. Remember I love you and am bringing you to meet my father, not senior airman douchebag.”

Remus sighed, but then smiled at her. “Yes, sorry.”

“Give me your wand” she said, taking hers out.

“What?”

“Your wand” she repeated, setting hers into her lap.

She waved her right hand over the wand, transfiguring it to a bobby pin that she gently tucked in her hair. Remus stared at her, his mouth gaping.

“Remus, give me your wand.” She repeated firmly, holding her hand out.

“How did you do that…” he said, looking to the bobby pin that was now tucked right behind her ear.

“Mum taught me. You can’t walk through security with a wand, I’ll give it back once were through.”

He handed her his wand, still staring at her vacantly. She waved her hand, and his wand turned into an identical bobby pin as hers.

“It’s a handy trick if you’re going somewhere that you’ll get patted down. It doesn’t allow for quick draw in an emergency, but I always transfigure it back once I’m through security at airports and on base.” she said, getting out of the car. He joined her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders as they walked up to the visitors entrance.

“Wandless magic is extremely complex” he said, looking down at her with a small smile. “You are an extraordinary witch. I can’t tell you this enough”

Mia rolled her eyes and wrapped her arm around his torso. “you just like to flatter me” she chuckled, a smile spreading wide on her face.

* * *

After they were pat down and sent through a metal detector, they were led to a large office after the guard at the visitor’s entrance radio’d John to let him know his visitors had arrived. Mia transfigured their wands back to their original state once they were alone in the office, Remus still awestruck at her ability to do this wandless. They sat down in the two chairs positioned on the other side of his desk, that was decorated with a plaque reading Lt. Colonel John H. Roswell, a US Air Force coffee mug holding many ink pens, and a bobble head of a man with a very strange head, dressed in scarlet and gray, which read ‘Brutus Buckeye’ at the base. The walls had a few posters of The Ohio State University Football team, and some man named Woody Hayes dressed in the same scarlet and grey that Remus assumed, was the team colors.

“What’s Ohio State University?” Remus asked innocently.

“ _The_ Ohio State University is my dad’s favorite American football team. He’s obsessed. He went there for school also.” Mia said as rolled her eyes.

Waiting was torture; Remus’ leg was bobbing up and down anxiously, thankful that he had decided to wear his nicest suit pants and dress shirt for the occasion. He felt his heart skip a beat when John entered the office, Mia jumping up to hug her father instantly.

“Hey Kiddo!” he exclaimed, giving her a hug.

Remus stood up in anticipation to shake John’s hand, feeling awkward and out of place.

“Daddy, this is Remus” Mia said smiling, motioning to him next to her.

John’s eyes narrowed as he shook Remus’ hand.

“John Roswell” he said, looking Remus up and down.

“Remus Lupin, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Remus said warmly, silently cheering to himself that his voice came across as smooth as it did.

John plopped himself in his office chair, the Brutus Buckeye bobble head shaking furiously from the earthquake he made sitting down. John was maybe 3” shorter than Remus, but was built very muscular with tan skin and glossy black hair. His hazel eyes mirrored Mia’s almost identically, and Remus could see they shared the same ears also.

“So, I’m going to be honest, when Mia said her boyfriend looked older than he was, I still wasn’t expecting a graying man with wrinkles.” John said frankly.

“Dad!” Mia cried, embarrassed by her father’s lack of couth.

“Bad genetics” Remus coughed awkwardly.

“How old are you anyway?” he asked, his eyes flickering dangerously.

“35” Remus said quietly.

“Well, seeing as how I’m 44 and my daughter is 20, you’re closer to my age than hers. How did you two meet, anyway?” John asked, his stare making Remus uncomfortable.

Remus opened his mouth to speak, but Mia beat him to the punch. 

“He’s a regular customer at the wine and cheese shop, even though he prefers scotch over wine. He actually has worked with Mum; he does consulting work for the police department. He used to be a professor, though.” Mia lied so smoothly there was no crack where the truth started and the lies stopped.

“Ah traded academia for a career of doing the detective’s bitch work?” John said in a playful tone, but his posture and gaze still not relaxing.

“Something like that” Remus said with a forced smile.

“So you say he knows your mother, what does she think of this?” John said, turning back to Mia.

Mia shrugged “she’s furious, of course”.

John sighed and relaxed in his chair. “Does this man make you happy?”

“Yes, very much” she said, giving Remus a smile.

“And does he treat you well? With respect?” the look on John’s face was fatherly and stern.

“Yes, daddy, yes. He is a good man, I promise.” Mia said, still smiling at Remus, taking his hand. Remus smiled back at her, squeezing her hand. 

“Well, if you’re happy and he’s treating you right, I guess I have no reason to object. My ex-wife is quite the ball breaker, I’m sure you’ve gotten enough flak from her.” 

“I wouldn’t say I’m her favorite person…” Remus said, giving a small laugh.

“Well, let me ask you something Remus, before we head off to dinner. This is the real deal breaker.” John said, leaning forward and placing his elbows on the desk. He clasped his hands together, looking at Remus with a wide grin.

“DAD! We’re British!!” Mia groaned and threw her face in her hands; she knew the idiotic question that was coming.

“How do you feel about the state of Michigan?”

* * *

John, Remus and Mia went off base for dinner. Mia drove the 3 of them to a sports pub a few miles away from base, Mia insisting she was craving chicken wings. 

“What do you think of this sweet jag, Remus? She’s a beaut, huh?” John had exclaimed when they got into the car.

“Yeah, she’s… gorgeous” Remus said, trying to sound casual. 

Mia had to stifle back a snort of laughter, knowing full well Remus wasn’t fawning over the car like John was.

They ordered some chicken wings and beer at the sports pub, along with some nachos and potato skins. They had been casually chatting about the menu and favorite foods for the first few minutes of dinner, Remus’s nerves settling down.

“So, Remus, what did you teach?” John asked between bites of nachos. 

“Pardon?” Remus asked hastily, taking a sip of his beer. 

He knew full well what John was asking, but he needed a minute to think of what muggle subject he could pretend to know.

“What did you teach, at the university you were at?” John repeated.

“He taught criminal justice” Mia interjected casually. “It helped him tremendously when he decided to switch into consulting work for the police.”

Mia was lying through her teeth, and she did it with such grace and effort. Remus was impressed that John didn’t pick up on her fibs.

“And how is working with my ex-wife?” John chuckled.

“She’s great at what she does” Remus said, which wasn’t a lie; Susan was one of the best Aurors the Ministry had. “She’s put a lot of bad people behind bars”

“Sounds like ol’ Susan” John said. “Such a ball breaker, she gave my late wife a run for her money with her fury. Susan was always so intense; Miranda was much more free spirited.”

“Yes, Mia told me about her step-mother. I’m so sorry for your loss” Remus said kindly, noticing Mia’s posture stiffen at the mention of Miranda.

“Thanks, she was great, ya know. Breast cancer ran in her family, and she was so young when they found it. 37. They hadn’t been scanning her for it yet because of her age, so when they found it, it was too late.” John said, gazing down at his plate of chicken bones.

“Dad, who is Senior Airman Richardson?” Mia changed the subject hastily. “He was a real wanker at the gate.”

“Eric? He’s stationed here like me. Nice young man, about your age Mia. Was he rude to you? Should I rough him up?” John looked concerned.

“No, no he was just flirtatious; offered to show me the visitor parking himself. He is very proud to be senior airman.” Mia chuckled.

John waved his hand in dismissal, swallowing a sip of his beer. “Oh he’s harmless. Just tell him to shut up. He loves to brag about his recent promotion.”

Mia and Remus laughed; both of them were reminded of Percy Weasley.

* * *

Dinner went well the rest of the evening; John and Remus were getting along nicely, making Mia feel at ease. They all ate a large piece of cheesecake after their meals, as Mia claimed it was sacrilege to not enjoy cheesecake on her birthday. As the check came, both Remus and John reached for it.

“No, no, Remus- my treat. I’ve been looking forward to taking my little girl out all week” John said with a flashing smile

Remus didn’t fight him on the check, he honestly was worried about picking up the tab with how many beers all of them ordered plus the many dozens of chicken wings, but he didn’t want to seem like a mooch. Mia put her hand on his thigh under the table, letting him know it was ok; she had picked up on what he was trying to do.

“So will you guys be coming for Thanksgiving? I don’t think the General is going to be able to get us guys back to the US for the holiday so we’re planning on doing a potluck at my place.” John said, setting the bill folder upright with his credit card sticking ajar.

“Yes, we’d love to be there” Mia said, turning to Remus and grinning.

“What exactly is ‘Thanksgiving’?” Remus asked, thinking he sounded daft even asking.

“One of the most American holidays out there! Besides 4th of July.” John said jovially. “Basically we eat in excess and think about what were thankful for. There’s a bunch of history behind it, but I just cook the turkey and go with it.”

Remus nodded, looking slightly perplexed. 

“Dad, Remus got me the most beautiful bouquet of flowers this morning…” she said, changing the subject. 

She raved about the color and variety of the bouquet, her face gleaming as if she had won a pile of galleons. Remus zoned out from the conversation as he watched her interact with her father. He loved the way her nose crinkled when she laughed, and the glimmer in her hazel eyes when she was talking about something that excited her. He could get lost in those eyes, the gold flecks in them dancing like a flame in a soft breeze.

Arriving back on base, Mia and Remus dropped John back off at this office. They stepped out of the car to say goodbye, John pulling Mia into a hug and kissing the top of her head.

“Happy Birthday, kiddo; Remus, it’s been a pleasure—“ 

He held his hand out to shake Remus’s, his handshake firm and confident.

“Pleasures been all mine” Remus said politely, wringing his hand out when John turned back to Mia.

They finished their goodbyes, and got in the car to drive home. They were quiet again for a minute, the streetlights flashing past them as she drove.

“You know what the best part of my birthday was?” she asked.

“Hmm?” he asked, looking out the car window.

“Getting to spend it with you” she grinned

Remus let out a bark of laughter, turning to look at her. “Shut up” he laughed.

“What??” she cried, a big smile on her face.

“That was the cheesiest thing I’ve ever heard” he snickered, taking her hand that wasn’t on the steering wheel. 

“Whatever, you love me.” She smirked.

“More than you know” he said under his breath, kissing the back of her hand

They sat quietly the rest of the car ride, both enjoying each other’s presence and content with the silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Buckeye fans aka fans of _**The**_ Ohio State University are the craziest sports fans in America. We are nuts. We love the buckeyes, especially football, the current football coach Urban Meyer is practically a god, and our biggest rival is the University of Michigan, however we dislike Michigan State University just as much, so pretty much 'that state up north' we don't like. The week of the UM/OSU game, people literally cross out every single M that is found on campus. Road signs, campus signs, any work that has an M in it, the M gets crossed out in red tape. Its insane. I've known Uber drivers who have had people get out of the Uber mid-ride because their driver was just born in Michigan. We even have a song called ' We don't give a damn about the whole state of Michigan'. 
> 
> I'm roping John in with these die-hard OSU fans, so a boyfriend of his daughter better not be a Michigan fan, or there's going to be trouble. These fans are literally that intense, It's crazy.
> 
> Now, I personally am not a psychotic fan like that, I just enjoy some friendly football competition and sporting my local University, so If you are from or live in Michigan, I promise, I don't hate you! :)
> 
> Thank you all for reading Forever and Always thus far, and **GO BUCKS!**


	29. chapter 29

Headquarters became a revolving door for members of the Order. Sirius had a couple bedrooms on rotation for anyone who needed a place to crash for the night, especially those who were assigned guard duty to the department of mysteries. He was sitting in the kitchen one night in the middle of October, reading the idiocrasy of the Daily Prophet when he heard some furniture slamming upstairs. He jumped up, Kingsley was supposed to be staying the night, and it was unlike him to make such noise. Sirius pulled his wand out and jogged up the stairs, his mind alert and his body ready for action. He made his way down the second floor corridor to the room Kingsley was staying in, putting one hand on the door knob and holding his wand in front of him. 

“Kingsley?? You alright??” he called, and he heard a muffled sound from the other side of the door. 

He turned the knob and burst in, and to his dismay, found a naked Tonks bent over in a compromising position, Kingsley positioned behind her. 

“Ah fuck!” Sirius cried “you could’ve locked the door!!!” 

“You could’ve knocked!” Kingsley growled as Sirius slammed the door shut. 

He walked back down the hallway cursing under his breath; he owed Mia 10 galleons.

The next morning, Mia and Remus stopped over for breakfast. Kingsley and Tonks had slipped out of the house very early, skipping breakfast all together as to avoid the awkwardness with Sirius. Molly and Arthur were there, Molly cooking a delicious breakfast spread. 

“Had I known Tonks and Kingsley weren’t staying for breakfast, I wouldn’t’ve made so much food.” She said as she set the table. 

Sirius walked into the kitchen and tossed a small velvet sack at Mia. She opened it and peered inside; she saw 10 glittering gold coins. It took her a moment to realize why Sirius had handed her a sack of galleons; the sourness visible on his face. 

“No fucking way…” she breathed, a grin creeping on her face. 

“Don’t talk to me” he growled, making Mia smile even bigger. 

Remus looked at her and the velvet pouch puzzled, for which she didn’t elaborate. She simply winked, pocketing her galleons and grinning furiously. Sirius sat down at the table across from them, his face puckering, 

“That’s total bullshit, by the way” he sneered at Mia.

She stuck her tongue out at him, snickering into her coffee cup.

* * *

Order changed the agenda of dueling practice one crisp November morning to practicing sending messages with their patronuses. Everyone was standing in a circle, sending theirs to the middle as if delivering message to the group. Susan’s badger scurried around the group quickly, her message reading loud and clear, compared to Sirius’s dog’s message too soft and scratchy to hear what it was saying. 

“I spent 12 years in Azkaban, my patronus is a little rusty” he shrugged. 

When it was Remus’s turn, he hesitated; he hated producing a corporeal patronus. He preferred to keep it as plain silver shields and wisps, due to the fact that his patronus was a wolf, and he hated it. It was a constant reminder as to what he was. He fought his embarrassment and cast his bright silver wolf, his message ringing clear. Tonks and Kingsley took their turns with his lynx and her jackrabbit before it was Mia’s turn to try. She hadn’t tried to send a message via patronus before, so she figured it would come out just as bad as Sirius’s. She closed her eyes and focused on the message she wanted to send, allowing all her happy memories of Remus to fill her as she cast her silvery wolf to the middle of the circle; her message ringing clear. 

“I hope this comes out ok” the wolf rang in her voice, and Mia jumped up and down with delight. 

“I did it!” she exclaimed. Sirius rolled his eyes at her 

“Show off” he growled, giving her a half smile. 

“Your patronus is a wolf also? That’s curious…” Tonks said, scratching her chin. 

“Very curious.” Susan said flatly, a look of pure dissatisfaction on her face. 

“Why is that curious??” she hissed at Sirius, but didn’t get the chance answer as Arthur’s silver weasel interrupted them. She turned to Remus who was giving her a peculiar smile. Irritation flushed through her; she hated feeling like she was the only one who didn’t know something.

* * *

As the holidays drew nearer, their lives kept them away from 12 Grimmauld place. Between Mia’s shifts at the wine and cheese shop and her guard duties for the Order, she didn’t get a ton of free time to spend with Sirius. She and Tonks were usually teamed up to guard the Department of Mysteries, which under the cover of Moody’s invisibility cloaks, kept them concealed for their shifts. They had grown to become pretty great friends, sharing stories of their times at Hogwarts, stories of Remus and Kingsley, and Tonks giving Mia advice on becoming an Auror. Remus was sent off on many secret missions for Dumbledore, keeping him from spending much free time at headquarters as well. It seemed like the only time he retreated back to headquarters the last 6 weeks for more than just a few minutes was to stay in the cellar during the full moons, feeling like that was the most secure place for him. Sirius seemed to be getting more depressed by the day, turning into quite a grouch. Mia tried to make the effort to see Sirius when she could, but he seemed irritated by how little he had been seeing of her and Remus, making it hard to enjoy their visits. 

Mia was pretty sure that Sirius and Penelope had been in correspondence at least. Whenever an unfamiliar owl would appear at the window, Penelope would hastily snatch the parchment from the owl, grinning ear to ear and blush furiously as she slipped back into her bedroom. She failed miserably at being casual; closing her bedroom door every time she got a letter was a dead give-away she was receiving messages she didn’t want Remus and Mia to see.

They spent Thanksgiving on base with John and his unit. Remus was still confused by the whole tradition of Thanksgiving, but wasn’t arguing with a large spread of turkey and mashed potatoes that the airmen prepared. A couple members of John’s unit joined them for the holiday, Remus irritated by the presence of ‘Senior Airman Douchebag’, Eric, who was obviously interested in Mia. Remus found it curious when he was the one to call Mia and inform her that John needed her to make pumpkin pies for the dinner, rather than John calling himself. He acted as if Remus didn’t exist any time they had interacted with him while on base, and the holiday was no different. Eric spent most of Thanksgiving dinner giving Mia wry smiles, and asking her questions to try to get to know her. His pearly white teeth and his chiseled jaw line made Remus want to hit him with a bat bogey hex. That would fix his unnecessarily handsome face right up.

She and Remus had started staying mostly at her flat, but Mia loved being back at the cottage for the weekends. It was so much more relaxing than the hustle and bustle of London. Her and Penelope’s flat was always so noisy, they would cast silencing charms to block out the street noise, but there was something about the cottage that made it seem so peaceful. Mia almost swore the air was fresher out there.

They were curled up in bed one night in mid-December, sleeping with about 7 fluffy blankets that had been cast with heating charms to warm them as they slept, snow falling gently outside. Mia’s head was resting on Remus’s chest when she was startled awake by a clattering on the window. She sprung up and grabbed her wand. 

“Lumos” she muttered, and was relieved to see it was just an owl at the window. 

She opened it to let the owl in, untying the parchment that was attached to its leg. She gave the owl one of Lionel’s treats, who snapped his beak in irritation. 

“Oh Lionel, don’t be such a prat” she hissed at the owl, who snapped at her in response. 

Remus sat up and stretched his arms and yawned, his hair disheveled from sleeping so soundly. 

“It’s cold, close the window!” he complained, groaning. 

The barn owl hooted and flew out the window, Mia closing the pane behind it. She opened the letter and gasped. 

“Arthur’s been injured! He was attacked by a snake, Molly said he’s going to be ok, but we can’t visit him for another day or so.” Mia said in disbelief. 

“What do you mean attacked by a snake??” Remus asked pointedly, now much more awake and alert. 

He grabbed the letter out of Mia’s hands and read it quickly. 

“I’m going to call Sirius” he growled, and exited the bedroom. 

Mia wrapped herself in a fluffy heated blanket and followed him, finding him on his knees with his head in the fireplace. She made a cup of tea for both of them and situated herself on the couch to wait for him to finish speaking with Sirius. They spoke for maybe 15 minutes before Remus yanked his head back out of the fireplace, turning to see Mia situated comfortably with her tea. 

“So?” she asked, taking a sip. 

He joined her on the couch and picked up his mug she had brought him. 

“Voldemort was behind it. Arthur was guarding the department of mysteries, alone, and he had the snake attack him. Harry saw the whole thing in a dream, most likely saved his life.” 

“Why was he alone???” Mia hissed. 

“I guess Bill wasn’t able to work his shift tonight, but rather than try to get a replacement, he just told Bill to take the night off. Things had been quiet; he didn’t think it was a big deal.” Remus said heavily. “Bill feels guilty.” 

“I’m sure” Mia said, “We should head back to headquarters in the morning. I’ll owl Penelope and get her to cover for me at work for a few days.”

* * *

The next morning, Remus and Mia apparated to 12 Grimmauld place, finding the Weasley children, Harry and Molly situating themselves to leave. Sirius looked terrible; he was unshaven, his hair hadn’t been brushed and he smelled like a distillery. He had sunk himself into the couch, looking disappointed he couldn’t go to visit Arthur. 

As if her name had a taboo placed on it, Tonks came bustling into entranceway, kicking the umbrella stand and awaking Mrs. Black’s screeching portrait. Molly and Sirius flew upstairs to shut up the Black matriarch, while Mia wrapped Tonks in a friendly hug. 

“Tonks you are fucking klutz” she giggled. 

“Wotcher, Mia” Tonks chuckled. “Ready to go, everyone?” 

She turned her attention to the group of teens congregated before them. Molly and Sirius reappeared back into the living room; Sirius now had a giant grin on his face. 

“Everyone, we are going to spend Christmas here instead of at the Burrow, if that’s alright. Here is much closer to St. Mungos”. 

The teens all gave an approving thumbs up or audible ‘yeahs!” making Sirius beam even more. 

“Remus, Tonks, Mia, of course you all are welcome for Christmas dinner, as are the other order members.” Molly added. 

“We’d love to, Molly.” Mia said, grinning at her and Sirius. 

“Wonderful, ok Sirius, we’ll be back after bit” 

Molly began ushering the kids out the front door, but Mia hung back and ran up to Sirius, hugging him. 

“It’s so good to see you” she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

* * *

St Mungo’s Hospital brought back memories for Mia of her childhood. She had seen a trauma counsellor here for a couple years after moving back to the UK, working through her PTSD from the night that John was tortured in front of her. The mannequin in the store window of Purge and Dowse ltd. looked the exact same as it did those years ago. She remembered her mother talking to the mannequin, then having her and Mia lean against the window to enter the lobby. She wasn’t paying attention to anyone’s conversations until she heard Tonks address the mannequin.

“Wotcher, we’re here to see Arthur Weasley” she said softly.

The mannequin nodded slightly, beckoning the group forwards with a slight movement of its finger. They leaned against the glass in pairs, feeling like they were stepping through the barrier of platform 9 ¾ at Kings Cross. 

Once inside the lobby, Mia felt another sense of familiarity looking around at scene before her. She was reminded of her mother taking her small hand and leading her to the Welcome Witch’s desk to check in.

_“Amelia Roswell, Trauma counselling”_ Susan would whisper, not wanting the other people around her to hear the reasoning for their visit.

_“yes, 4th floor, as you know by now”_ the welcome witch would say, her tone bored and unenthusiastic.

Mia almost thought she was that same little girl for a split second when she felt a hand take her own. She turned to see Remus, pulling her along as the group was quite a few paces ahead.

“Sorry, I spaced out” she said, looking back over her shoulder.

“It’s alright” he said with a warm smile “Arthur is in the Dai Llewellyn ward, for serious bites” 

Remus led her down the halls, following the group towards the proper ward.

They had to visit Arthur in pairs, as the ward was small, so Tonks and Mia took their turn together. He looked as good as he could, as he was nearly mauled to death by a venomous snake. They made mostly small talk with him, trying to lift his spirits with light conversation. There were two other patients in the ward with him; a woman who wouldn’t disclose what she was working with when she was bit, and a man who suffered a werewolf bite.

The werewolf next to Arthur’s bed looked almost green as he lay there, quiet as can be. Arthur said he was having a difficult time coping with the idea that he was now a werewolf, which struck a chord with Mia. Apparently Arthur had told him about Remus, and what a great person he was, but he didn’t have much luck lifting his spirits. 

“You can send in Remus and Molly, I’m going to hang back” she whispered to Tonks when they had finished their visit.

She walked over to where the werewolf was laying, entering the partition that separated him with the other patients. Tonks looked at her puzzled, but shook it off and exited the ward.

“Hi” she said casually as she sat down

“uhm, hello” the werewolf said uncomfortably

“I’m Mia” she smiled

“Why are you sitting here?” the werewolf asked, not introducing himself.

“I just figured you’d like some company.” Mia said, still smiling at him. “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit, if you’re asking” he scoffed. 

Mia recognized the look of self-loathing on this man’s face, she had seen it on Remus’s ten times over at this point. He hated what happened to him, and hated what he now was.

“You will be able to live a relatively normal life with this condition” Mia said soothingly, but the man glared at her.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, little girl.” He growled

“Little girl? How old do you think I look?” Mia’s tone became slightly irritated, but she told herself that this man was just projecting his anger onto her. “My boyfriend is a werewolf.”

Remus had been in the ward for a few minutes at this point, and couldn’t help but eavesdrop on Mia’s conversation.

“Boyfriend? You shag a man that has this illness?” the werewolf asked in disbelief, looking her up and down with a quizzical stare.

“I do, and he is a wonderful, good man. I love him because and in spite of what he is. He is more than his illness, same as you.” She said, smiling at him again. “He is self-conscious about what he is also, and I won’t lie, there are some very prejudice people out there, but his life is good. You will find your way through this, I know it.”

The werewolf’s expression softened slightly, but he didn’t say anything. Mia didn’t want to overstay her welcome, so she decided to leave him with that last bit.

“Well, I got to go. Have a good day, sir” she said politely, and got up to leave the ward. 

The werewolf didn’t respond, but Remus on the other side of the partition, found himself smiling. 


	30. chapter 30

Sirius’s spirits lifted tremendously having company for Christmas. Hermione joined the teens once term had recessed for the holidays, keeping everyone updated with what was happening at Hogwarts for the few days the Weasley children and Harry were out. 

“Umbridge is very angry you guys left before term. She was fuming about it the next morning” she had explained. 

“That woman is a terror; she signed some anti werewolf legislation a few years back, making it nearly impossible for me to find work. Not that it was easy in the first place, but it’s worse now.” Remus had ranted, seething with irritation.

Mia was silently thankful that she wasn’t a student at Hogwarts anymore; knowing full well her and Dolores Umbridge wouldn’t’ve gotten along. 

She was thrilled to see Sirius in such a good mood, running about 12 Grimmauld place jovially, hanging silver and gold garlands and sparkling ornaments to brighten the place up. A pang of guilt ran through her; she knew she should be over here with Sirius more, she couldn’t imagine how bored he got most of the time. He traded Azkaban for this prison of his parent’s house. 

On Christmas day, they woke up to the smell of a delicious breakfast, of course prepared by Molly. The table was full of people; the teens dominated one half, while the other half was taken by members of the Order. Susan was cordial with Mia, but very short and cold towards Remus, which everyone had gotten used to. Remus killed her with kindness, always polite and courteous, which most likely irritated her more. Mia no longer cared if her mother supported the two of them, because she had the idea that it would never happen. 

Everyone exchanged Christmas gifts, Molly surprising both Remus and Mia with hand knitted maroon sweaters that matched the ones the Weasley children always received. 

“Molly, this is so thoughtful, thank you so much” Remus said, sliding the sweater on and getting his head stuck in the sleeve, making the entire group minus Susan chuckle. 

Susan got Mia a new quill and ink set, the set coming with inks in different colors such as sapphire and emerald, and the quill was a bright purple feather that was tipped in glittering gold. Mia had gotten her mother a new wall clock for her office at work that sang the time at the top of the hour. She purposefully labeled the gift from her and Remus, making Susan’s lips pucker with sourness, and Mia feeling smugly satisfied. 

Mia had gotten Sirius a photo of the two of them encased in a handsome gold frame. Remus had taken a photo of them doing silly poses one day by the lake near the cottage last summer, the photo replaying a few poses over and over that made Mia laugh every time she looked at it. Sirius’s eyes sparkled looking at the picture, chuckling as he recalled the day well.

“This is wonderful, Mia, thank you” he said, kissing her cheek and giving her a toothy grin.

Sirius had gotten her a large box stuffed to the brim with licorice wands, pumpkin pasties, chocolate frogs, and boxes upon boxes of Bertie Bott's every flavor beans. At the bottom of the box was a medium sized bottle of firewhisky, with a note taped to it that read ‘Must be consumed with Sirius Black’.

Mia had gotten Remus some fresh robes, as she had described his appearance as ‘shabby and outdated’. He chuckled, reminding her most of his robes he’d had for many _many_ moons. 

He then handed Mia a small black box with a gold ribbon, a wide smile creeping on to her face as she wondered what was in it. She opened the lid to find a thin, gold bracelet that looked seamless. It was smooth all the way around, and looked much too large for her. Remus lifted up his sleeve to reveal his wrist that was wearing the same exact bracelet.

“It’s enchanted to fit once you put it on. When both of us wear these, if either of us is in danger, the other’s bracelet will vibrate. It will sense danger approaching before you know it’s there yourself” He explained. “This will come in handy if either of us needs help but can’t send a patronus”

Mia looked at him with a wide smile. This was the most perfect gift; she always worried about him going off on secret missions with Dumbledore, never knowing if he was alright while he was gone.

“Remus, its perfect; Thank you” she said softly. 

Sirius’s eyes twinkled at them as Susan’s flashed irritably. 

“Here…” Remus said, taking the bracelet from the box and sliding it on her. It instantly shrunk to fit Mia’s slim wrist without sliding off. “If you ever need to take it off, just tap it with your wand 3 times. Only you can remove it now.” He said, showing her as he tapped his own bracelet with her wand, and then with his. His wand allowed the gold to swell to slip it off, versus her wand didn’t do anything to it.

Mia threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly, not caring that everyone at the table was watching them. 

“I love you” she whispered.

* * *

Visiting Arthur that day was a cheery event. St. Mungo’s was decorated nicely for Christmas, and everyone seemed to be in good spirits. The werewolf next to Arthur didn’t have any visitors for the holiday, so Remus and Mia sat with him for a minute. The werewolf eyed both Remus and Mia as they sat down and smiled at him. He turned his attention to Mia without saying hello first.

“So this is the werewolf boyfriend?” the man said.

Mia chuckled and looked at Remus. “Yeah, this is him. Handsome isn’t he?” she winked at the werewolf, who still looked a twinge of green.

“It’s nice to meet you” Remus said “I’m Remus Lupin”

The werewolf didn’t introduce himself.

“So why are you two here?” he growled irritably.

“It’s Christmas, we were visiting Arthur and wanted to stop over” Mia said sweetly.

The werewolf didn’t respond to her.

“I got you something.” Mia said, holding out a small gold box.

The werewolf stared at it, not reaching to take it from her. Mia just smiled at him again, and set it on the bedside table next to him.

“I’ll leave it here for you to open later” she said “Remus, I’m going to get a cup of coffee, meet me out here when you boys are finished chatting?” 

The werewolf’s face twisted in irritation that Mia was leaving him so chat with a perfect stranger. She kissed Remus’s cheek and trotted off. When she had exited the ward, the werewolf turned to Remus.

“She must be a handful” he said flatly.

Remus smiled and nodded, “oh you have no idea…”

He talked with him for a few minutes about the transformations, giving him advice on what helps, what doesn’t, and general werewolfery. The man was sort of receptive to what Remus had to say, his body language relaxing by the end of their chat. 

“Well, I better see where Mia ran off to. Good luck to you, sir, and Merry Christmas” Remus said when their conversation came to an appropriate pause.

The werewolf nodded and watched Remus leave the room. He turned to the little gold box that Mia had left him, waiting until he was alone to open it. He pulled the lid off to reveal a small, colorful blown glass sculpture of a wolf, with a little note tucked inside.

_You will get through this._

The werewolf admired the beauty of the figurine, its colors sparkling in the bright lights of the hospital ward. For the first time since he had been bitten, he smiled.

* * *

After the holidays, Sirius’s mood plummeted again when the kids went back off to school. Sirius was very irritable that Snape would be teaching Harry occlumency lessons, as he and Snape didn’t get along and he was concerned he would treat Harry poorly. Dumbledore also suggested that the Order begin practicing occlumency as well; lessons beginning with Moody in February. Mia didn’t think Sirius could get any lower until news came out that there was a mass breakout from Azkaban; many of Voldemort’s most loyal servants escaping, including Sirius’s cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange. The knowledge of the mass breakout had most of the wizarding world in a panic, which Mia was not immune to. She had felt a surge of panic run through her when amongst the list of names and photos of escaped death eaters, her eyes landed on someone familiar. She stared at the moving picture, her stomach twisting in knots to see the horribly smug face of the death eater who haunted her nightmares. The long, thin face of this man was burned into her mind, never to be forgotten as she was constantly reminded most nights when she closed her eyes. It was reliving and also terrifying to put a name with this face. The man who Mia couldn’t get out of her head was none other than one of Lord Voldemort’s most vicious and terrible servants; Antonin Dolohov.

Upon learning Dolohov’s name, her nightmare came more frequently than it had been. She had been only waking up in cold sweats a couple times a month, but now, it was almost every night the images from that terrible night so long ago plagued her slumber. Mia felt she needed a good distraction from all the bad news, and her mind only thought of one thing; a party.

“So, maybe we could have Sirius come here to…” Mia had started saying to Remus as they had lunch at her flat.

“He can’t leave headquarters” Remus said simply

“Well, we are maybe 15 blocks from headquarters. We could get him over to our place in just a few minutes; he needs out of that house.” Mia pushed “besides, I’m sure Penny would love to see him.”

Remus chuckled; Sirius and Penelope asked about each other regularly, but hadn’t seen each other since their night at the cottage.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea.” he said

“Well, I do. I’ll ask Penny.” 

Mia grabbed an apple off the table and hopped out of her chair, marching herself into Penelope’s bedroom. Penelope was taking a shower, which Mia blatantly ignored as she popped her head into the bathroom.

“Hey” she said, making Penelope jump.

“Jesus, Mia, I’m naked in here” Penelope snarled

“Whatever. So, what do you think about us having a party with the boys here?” Mia said, taking a bite out of her apple.

Penelope shut the water off and grabbed her towel hastily. “You know, you could’ve waited until I was dressed”

Mia simply took another bite out of her apple and shrugged. “It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before.”

Penelope rolled her eyes and squeezed the water out of her hair. “By boys, you mean…?”

“Remus and Sirius, duh.”

Penelope blushed and fought a grin spreading on her face at the sound of Sirius’s name.

“I’m going to ask Kingsley and Tonks too, maybe Bill and his girlfriend, whatever the hell her name is. Something French.”

“I thought Sirius couldn’t leave his house.” She asked, trying to keep a straight face. “at least that’s what he told me”

“Well, he’s not supposed to… wait- when did he tell you that?” Mia gave her a smirk; _busted_

“We write letters…” Penelope said sheepishly.

“I knew it! That’s why you always read your mysterious letters with the door shut. Are you and Sirius talking dirty over your owls?” Mia prodded.

Penelope blushed furiously, looking extremely guilty by Mia’s question. Mia laughed, speaking as she was chewing

“I’m working on a plan to get him over here. What do you think?” 

“Sure, if you think it’ll be safe getting him here” Penelope shrugged, trying to sound casual.

Mia took another bite of her apple and smiled again, raising her brows in excitement as she turned around and exited the bedroom.

“Alright Remus, party is on.”

* * *

Mia arrived at headquarters that weekend excited and nervous. She walked in to the house dressed in jogging clothes with her hands around her back, grinning furiously. Sirius was standing in the middle of the living room, dressed in his muggle best and smelling like expensive cologne. His hair was brushed, and he had shaved for the first time in what seemed like months. 

“Ready to go, Padfoot?” she smiled at him. 

“How are we going to do this?” he asked, his eyes flickered with excitement. 

Mia pulled a dog collar and leash from behind her back, grinning. Sirius slumped and looked disappointed. 

“Oh, not a collar….” He groaned. 

“Come on Snuffles, we’re going for a walk.”

 

Mia jogged with Sirius on the leash, his oversized dog appearance attracting less attention than she had anticipated. She felt her wand stabbing into her thigh slightly as she jogged, but she wanted it close in case she needed to pull it out suddenly. To keep an eye out for an ambush, Kingsley and Tonks walked ahead of them, and Bill and his girlfriend, Fleur Delacour, followed behind. It only took 10 minutes to jog from headquarters to her flat, where once she stopped jogging a neighbor of hers waved and spoke to her. 

“Hi Amelia, did you get a dog?” 

The old lady said as she passed Mia and Sirius, walking out to the mailboxes. 

“I’m dog-sitting for my cousin” Mia said, her lie smooth as if she had practiced this many times. 

“Oh, how nice of you; Have a good day!” the old woman said cheerily, and kept shuffling. 

Sirius sat down and whined at her. 

“Don’t worry, she’s a regular muggle old lady” Mia said reassuringly. 

 

Once they were inside, Mia slipped off the collar and Sirius transformed back into a man. 

“I hate leashes…” he scowled, but his grumpiness from their jog was immediately gone when he turned to see Penelope, standing in the doorway to her bedroom with a shy smile plastered on her face. She was dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a gray sweater set, her ashy curls falling into perfect ringlets around her face. 

“Well, hey there, kitten.” He said in a low, husky voice. 

“Hi Sirius…” she said, smiling back. 

Tonks and Kingsley exchanged looks at watching Penelope and Sirius make eyes at each other.

“Alright, Remus should be here in a few, and Bill and Fleur were right behind us. I’m going to take a shower” Mia called. 

 

She walked into her bedroom and shut the door, peeling off her sweaty jogging clothes and throwing them on the floor. She turned on the shower, and steam began to fill the bathroom. She loved the way a hot shower felt, the water pressure was so firm it felt like a massage on her back. She kept her shower quick as to not keep the group waiting, but wishing she could’ve stayed in there for hours. She grabbed her towel and dried herself, then wrapped her hair in her towel and stepped out of the shower. She made it to the doorway of her bathroom and bedroom and jumped when she saw Remus leaning against her dresser.

“Bloody hell, Remus” she breathed, clutching her chest.

His eyes flashed at her as he advanced on her, grabbing her shoulders and pushing her against the door frame. He kissed her firmly, his body pressing against hers to hold her in place. 

“Your body is perfect” he growled in her ear as she ran his hands up and down her side. 

“They’re waiting for us…” she protested with a giggle 

“They will be fine” he said, his hand finding its way between her legs. 

She felt herself grow wet in anticipation, his fingers brushing against her inner thighs, teasing her. He slipped two fingers inside, arching them to hit her g spot. She gasped; he clasped his hand over her mouth and shushed her as he began to work his fingers inside her, his thumb pressing her clit rhythmically. Her whole body shook as he brought her closer to release, her whimpers muffled by his hand keeping her quiet. 

“That’s it, come on…” he whispered; the pressure was building up between her legs, her release was so close. 

He pushed in even farther, tipping her over the edge. Her whole body jerked, and she would’ve collapsed if he hadn’t been pushing her against the wall to hold her up. Her cries of pleasure sounded like mere breaths from his hand that remained over her mouth. When she had relaxed, he removed his hand and kissed her. 

“I’ll see you out there” he winked, moving away from her to release her from his hold.

She stumbled slightly as he moved, watching him grin wickedly as he slipped out of the bedroom. Her towel had fallen off her head, her long, wet hair stuck to half her face. She took a deep breath and smiled, chuckling under her breath.

 

Mia walked out of her bedroom in jeans and a v neck tee shirt, her hair dried smooth thanks to a handy hair-drying charm. Sirius and Penelope were situated on the couch, Sirius telling her stories of his time in Hogwarts and how much mischief him and James got into. Tonks was keeping Fleur entertained by her ever popular nose metamorphing trick. Bill, Kingsley and Remus were standing in the kitchen, sipping on glasses of scotch and making idle chit chat. Mia grinned at Remus as she walked past him, he returning a smirk that said ‘I just saw you naked.’

“Come eat!” she called, carrying a few plates of appetizers from the fridge to the table. 

The group swarmed around the food, grabbing plates and hungrily loading them with the deviled eggs, veggies and other snacks she had prepared.

“Damn, Mia, this is a nice spread you have here” Bill said grinning.

“She likes hosting parties” Remus chuckled, winking at her.

The group stood around and ate for a while before shifting to heavy cocktails. Mia had put on the WWN, which was playing a Weird Sisters marathon of all their songs.

“God I love this band!” Tonks shouted as she danced alone in the middle of the living room.

Penelope was practically sitting in Sirius’s lap she was so close to him; both of them watching Tonks dance, cheering her on. Bill and Fleur sat at one end of the table and fed each other pretzels, completely immersed in their own little world. Remus was refereeing Mia and Kingsley’s arm wrestling matches, which Kingsley won every single time.

“You can’t beat me, just give up” Kingsley said smugly.

“I can too, one more time!” She said, furrowing her brow furiously as she slammed her elbow back on the table.

“Mia, his arm is the size of your head, you can’t beat him” Remus chuckled, taking a sip of his scotch.

“Shut it Moony and just make sure he’s not cheating!”

Mia lost another few arm wrestling matches before Tonks came to whisk Kingsley away, wanting him to join her in dancing. Remus sat next to Mia, watching in amusement as Kingsley proved himself to be a better arm wrestler than a dancer. Sirius and Penelope had joined in on the dancing, Sirius looking like he was having the time of his life. Bill and Fleur seemed to be in their own little world, now taking turns feeding each other from the veggie tray.

“Fun party” Remus said casually, taking a sip of his scotch.

“Yeah, its fun getting everyone together” she smiled. “But everyone looks far too sober.”

Mia winked and jumped up from her chair, grabbing shot glasses from the kitchen cabinet. She poured everyone a shot and whistled to get the group’s attention.

“Everyone gets a shot!” she said cheerily, making trips back and forth to the table, as there were too many shots to carry in one trip. 

Remus was allowing himself to have much more fun than he did last time Mia hosted a party of this sort, downing his firewhisky quickly and shaking his head furiously at the after-burn. 

“That put some hair on your chest, Remus?” Kingsley jeered, taking his shot as smooth as water.

Tonks smacked her tongue after taking her shot, looking at Kingsley, fascinated. “I don’t know how he does it, firewhisky goes down like glass” she choked.

Kingsley patted her back and winked, his white teeth sparkling in contrast to his dark complexion. Fleur was playing with Bill’s hair rapturously, making Sirius whisper jokes about them in Penelope’s ear, who was giggling furiously. They took a couple more shots, the girls then made their way to the living room to continue the dance party Tonks had started. Fleur didn’t seem interested in joining; she was much too interested in Bill to care about anything else.

“God that Penelope is… well, something” Sirius said to Kingsley and Remus, staring at the girls with a nefarious expression.

“Think you’re lucky enough to get her into bed twice? I hope you took some felix felicis today” Remus heckled.

“Wait, what?” Kingsley said, looking at Sirius incredulously.

“I reckon so; watch this” Sirius said, handing Kingsley his glass of scotch and giving the men a devilish grin.

Sirius walked into the middle of the room and placed a hand on Penelope’s shoulder. He whispered in her ear, a huge grin spreading across her face. She turned around and nodded, grabbing his hand and led him towards her bedroom. Sirius looked back at Remus and Kingsley, winking as he entered her bedroom. A flash of light told them that a sealing and silencing charm went up on the door. Tonks and Mia skipped back over to them, giggling furiously. 

“You ok with him being in there with Penelope?” Remus asked Mia, gesturing to Penelope’s closed door.

“Oh I don’t care, she’s a big girl, and Sirius probably has had blue balls since the last time he saw her” Mia snorted, grabbing her cocktail off the table next to her.

“Really didn’t need to hear that” Kingsley said, his voice strained slightly from embarrassment. 

Tonks giggled at him, finding his embarrassment amusing.

“Hey, guys, we’re going to take off” a voice said from behind the group. 

They all turned to Bill and Fleur, almost forgetting that the two of them were still there.

“T’ank you zo much for hav’ng uz!” Fleur said, kissing all four of them on the cheek.

Mia’s cheek burned from where she kissed her, making her feel slightly uncomfortable. Kingsley and Remus didn’t seem quite as put off by this as her and Tonks were.

“Yeah, great party, Mia. Wish we could stay longer, but Fleur needs to get her beauty sleep” Bill said, turning to smile at her.

They rubbed their noses together lovingly, making Mia want to throw up on them.

“You’re welcome any time” Mia said through a forced smile.

They watched Bill and Fleur leave, waiting to say anything else. Once they were sure they had gone, Tonks and Mia busted out laughing.

“Those two are such lovesick puppies” Tonks snickered. “Kind of makes me want to hurl” 

 

The party went on a just a bit longer, Mia and Tonks polished the bottle of firewhisky and then both passed out in Mia’s bed shortly after. Sirius and Penelope remained sealed in the other bedroom, Kingsley and Remus very thankful for the silencing charm that went up. They sat at the table, finishing the bottle of scotch that they had been nursing the entire night.

“Well, they’re passed out. I hope you don’t mind that we stay the night” Kingsley said, craning his head to see Tonks and Mia in her room, passed out in their full clothes on top of the bed comforter.

“Not at all, the couch is all yours” Remus smirked, taking a sip of his scotch. “These young girls are going to be the death of us, aren’t they?” 

“Probably” Kingsley chuckled “Dora is only a few years younger than me, but my hangovers are ten times worse than hers”

Remus nodded in agreement, swirling his glass. “Yeah, I can certainly tell I am not in my twenties anymore the morning after a good drinking session”

Kingsley laughed, raising his glass in cheers before draining its contents. They were interrupted by the phone ringing, making the two men exchange glances. 

“Well, answer it” Kingsley shrugged.

Remus walked over to the phone and picked it up. He held it to its ear, feeling incredibly stupid using a muggle contraption such as this.

“Uh, hello?” he asked, feeling like he sounded like an idiot.

“Oh, uh, did I get the wrong number? I’m calling for Mia Roswell” the voice answered.

Remus felt irritation wash over him at the sound of the familiar voice. It was Eric.

“At one in the morning?” Remus asked flatly “she’s asleep”

“It’s a weekend, the night is young” Eric replied, his words slightly slurred together. “Who’s this?”

“Remus” he said shortly.

“Riiiiiggghttt whaddup sugar daddy!” Eric slurred “well, tell her I called. It’s Eric. Richardson. Fuck, I’m drunk. Just tell her Eric called, she’ll know”

Remus rolled his eyes, wishing he could send a slug vomiting hex through the phone.

“Yep, I got that. I’ll tell her” Remus muttered, hanging up the phone.

Remus slunk back to the table, pouring himself another glass of scotch and downing it in one gulp.

“Who was that?” Kingsley asked, puzzled by Remus’s obvious irritation.

“Just some drunken limp dick airman that works with Mia’s father” He grumbled. “He’s obviously pining for her and has complete disregard for the fact that she’s mine.” 

“Hmmm, I wouldn’t worry, Mia is crazy about you” Kingsley shrugged, taking another sip.

Remus smirked, running his finger along the rim of his glass. “And he called me ‘sugar daddy’, any idea what that means?”

Kingsley choked and spat his scotch out; laughing so hard no sound was coming out.

“What??” Remus asked, but he couldn’t get a word out of Kingsley though his choking laughter.

“Fucking sugar daddy, that’s rich” he said in a constricted voice.

“What does it mean????” Remus demanded, beginning to laugh himself.

"he thinks she is shagging you for money" Kingsley said through more chuckles

"little does he know, I'm broke" Remus smirked

The two men sat there and convulsed with laughter, the many glasses of scotch making them unable to get a grip.

* * *

Sirius woke up next to Penelope feeling feelings he hadn’t felt in nearly 14 years. He of course enjoyed shagging a beautiful woman, but he had found himself drawn to Penelope ever since their night at Remus’s cottage nearly one year ago. Their letters they wrote were one of the things that kept him going in his isolation at 12 Grimmauld place; sharing tidbits of their lives with one another and the occasion dirty innuendos made Sirius feel like a man. Waking up next to this beautiful woman, made Sirius feel even more like a man than the letters had. Her smooth, pale skin looked ethereal in the glow of the sunlight coming in from her window. Her curls were frizzed from his hands grasping her hair last night. He was impressed with how good she looked considering the heavy amounts of alcohol both of them had consumed. His heart felt heavy looking at her sleeping so peacefully. He was a convict, despite his innocence, and must live his life in hiding. He wasn’t free; he was a prisoner despite escaping Azkaban. He could never have a life with a beautiful woman such as Penelope, he’s known this, but the few moments of normalcy he’d experienced with her over the last year helped him escape his reality. He knew this would have to be the last time he saw her; it wasn’t fair to keep her occupied when he wasn’t able to give her what she needed. 

He slipped out of bed quietly, trying to let her sleep, and made his way into her bathroom. He took a leak and then found himself staring at himself in the mirror while he washed his hands. He sighed. Fine lines were appearing in the corners of his eyes, and his skin texture wasn’t quite this rough before he went to Azkaban. _Sirius Black, you are old_ He thought as he swished some water in his mouth to rinse the taste of last night’s booze fest. He snuck one last look at himself in the mirror, scoffing at the aging man before him, and exited the bathroom. Penelope was now sitting upright in bed, sheets pulled to her neck, smiling slightly at Sirius.

“Good morning” she said softly

“Morning, kitten; Sleep well?” he grinned at her, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Penelope yawned and nodded, patting the bed where Sirius had slept last night. He crawled back in bed and laid on his back, Penelope scooching up close to him and resting her head onto his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Sirius closed his eyes, almost falling back asleep.

“Sirius?” she whispered.

“Hmmm?” he hummed, his eyes still closed.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure” he grumbled sleepily, opening his eyes to look down at her.

“What was it like? In Azkaban…”

“Oh, surely you don’t want to know about that, love.” He said in a dismissive tone.

“I’m sorry—” she said hastily, starting to sit up.

“No, love, its ok— lay back down” he said, pulling her towards him “it was… terrible”

Penelope looked up at him, his eyes staring at the ceiling.

“The cells were cold, damp and filthy. Smelled like a toilet. The dementors sucked all the happiness out of everyone there, so all you could hear was shrieks of prisoners slipping into madness. Many of the prisoners would cry out for their loved ones at night, begging them to save them. One bloke screamed for his mother for 2 straight months, ended up strangling himself with his bedsheets.”

Penelope wiped a stray tear from her cheek as she listened.

“Sometimes I dream of it, being back in that filthy cell, hearing the screams.”

Sirius hadn’t meant to be so honest with her, but it just slipped out. He hoped he didn’t freak her out.

“How did you escape?” she asked.

“I don’t know _how_ I did it, exactly” he began slowly, “but for some reason, the dementors couldn’t sense me when I was a dog. I quit eating for a while so I would be thin enough to squeeze through the bars of my cell. I ended up swimming miles to shore.”

“Thank you for telling me” Penelope said, nuzzling her head into his chest.

Sirius gave her a squeeze of affirmation, chuckling softly. They laid there for another few minutes in silence, before Sirius knew it was time to tell her. 

“Penelope, I want to thank you…” he began, sitting up.

She looked up at him puzzled, looking in to his dark eyes. There was so much warmth in them, so much life.

“For what?” she asked

“For this. For all of this. I haven’t felt like myself in a very very long time, but you have helped me feel like the man I once was again.” He said, his eyes twinkling at her.

He reached over to his trousers that were on the floor next to the bed, and pulled out a small black box from the pocket. 

“We’re not going to be able to see each other again, kitten.” He said heavily.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t say that.” she said with melancholy chuckle. “I wish we would’ve gotten more time together”

“Me too, trust me, love.” He said as he fingered the small black box gently. “I can’t give you any sort of relationship while I am on the run, which I think will be for a very long time. It was dangerous for Mia to sneak me over here; I can’t expect her to do it again. I wish I was able to have this, but I can’t.”

Penelope swallowed and nodded. She knew nothing could ever come of her shagging Sirius, but sending him letters had given her a certain fondness for him. She wouldn’t necessarily say she was in love with him, but she felt strong feelings and a close intimacy with him.

“I want you to have something.” He said, handing her the small black box.

Penelope looks at him puzzled, but opens the box to reveal a large faced silver watch, with a black leather wrist band. The band has an imprint of ‘S.B.’ near the buckle.

“I received that as a gift from James’s parents on my 17th birthday. My family had already disowned me the year prior, and the Potter’s essentially adopted me as a second son. They knew my old bag of a mother wouldn’t be sending me a ‘coming of age’ watch, so the Potter’s had this made special for me”

Sirius’s eyes sparkled at the watch in Penelope’s hand, remembering his birthday that year well. Penelope felt a lump form in her throat, overwhelmed that Sirius wanted her to have such a prized possession.

“Sirius, I can’t…” she started, handing him back the watch.

“You can, please, I want you to have it” he said, pushing the watch back towards her. “Here…”

He fastened the watch around her wrist on its tightest notch, it just slightly big for her.

“Thank you for making me feel like a man again” he whispered, his hand still lingering on her wrist.

Penelope gave him a small smile and kissed him. 

“Can we at least let you feel like a man for another couple minutes?” she said slyly.

Sirius grinned wide, grabbing her around the waist and pulling her down on her back. Penelope giggled as she wrapped her arms around his neck; he looking down at her with the warmest smile she’d ever seen. He kissed her firmly and thought _in this moment, at least, I am free._


	31. Chapter 31

As the weather shifted into spring, The Order remained busy with guarding the Department of Mysteries, Occlumency lessons with Moody, and dueling practices. Mia was getting particularly good at Occlumency; Moody only catching a quick glimpse of a memory of Remus and Mia in a compromising position, for which he very sharply told her to focus, so he “wouldn’t have to see that godforsaken shit again”, as she recalled him saying.

Remus had start allowing Mia to accompany him in the cellar during his transformations after she refused to leave his company one full moon.

“No— come on, out! I don’t want you to see me like this” he said upon discovering her sitting in the cellar.

“I hate you being locked up all by yourself; I’ll keep you company.” She said, and transformed into the white wolf in front of him.

“The moon will be up in just a minute, please— for me, go?” 

Mia had just sat there, refusing to move.

“Must you always be _so_ difficult?” he scowled as he sealed the entrance to the cellar.

She lay down and licked her paws in triumph, and looked as smug as a wolf could possibly.

* * *

A nice day in late May made Sirius envious of everyone else in the world. He wished he could be outside; running through a forest of enjoying a walk through a park, but he was trapped inside. He hated being stuck inside the walls of his parents’ house, the ugly memories plastered everywhere. He was feeling loathsome in the parlor, his concentration on the Black family tapestry broken as he heard a voice call from the doorway.

“Oi, Padfoot!” Mia called, trotting into the parlor

“Hey kitten, I didn’t know you were here” He said, kissing her on the cheek.

“I just got here, how are you?” 

“Bored out of my fuckin’ mind” he said with a playful smile. 

“Good thing I brought refreshments—and cheesecake, of course.” she grinned, pulling a bottle of firewhisky and a bag with a couple slices of cheesecake from behind her back. 

“You’re wicked, you know that?” he laughed, waving his wand to have a couple of glasses appear on a small table that was in the corner of the parlor.

“Actually, you are. Does this look familiar?”

Mia showed him the front of the bottle that had a handwritten note taped to the front; saying ‘must be consumed with Sirius Black’.

Sirius grinned “I’m so glad I suggested that”

They poured themselves a glass of firewhisky, both downing it in a quick gulp. They poured a second glass, this time savoring the honey colored liquid.

“So what are you looking at in here?” Mia asked, looking at the part of the tapestry that Sirius had been studying.

“Oh nothing really, it got me thinking about my family though.” Sirius said; his voice gravelly from the sip of firewhisky he had just sipped. “I really don’t have any left, I mean, a couple cousins of course, but most of them are bad eggs so…”

Mia could tell that he seemed a little down thinking about his family. He didn’t have a good relationship with his parents due to him not sharing the same views of pure-blood supremacy as them, which was his parent’s loss in Mia’s mind. 

“Does it bother you to be one of the last Blacks?” Mia said, taking a sip from her glass.

“I haven’t thought about it like that before” Sirius said, his voice quiet.

“Well, you have us, and we’re better than your pureblood elitist family.”

“I certainly like you and the Order much better” he chuckled.

Mia still could see a forlorn look on his face, despite the normalcy of his tone of voice. He had been gazing at the Black family tapestry for their whole conversation, not making eye contact.

“Sirius.”

“hmm?” he said, turning to look at her when she didn’t respond right away.

“You have a family.” she said, giving him a half smile.

He looked at her puzzled.

“Harry, Remus, me, we are your family.” Mia set her empty glass on the small table, continuing to speak. “When everything goes to shit, the people who stand by you are your family. Not these people on this tapestry. We will stand by you, even though they don’t.” 

Sirius felt a lump form in his throat, unsure if it were her words or the scotch making him feel so emotional. Mia wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tight.

“I love you, Sirius— we love you. Please don’t forget that while you’re stuck in here” she whispered.

Sirius kissed her cheek and hugged her back. She was right; the people who stood by him- Remus, Mia, James, Lily and Harry, were more like family to him than these people he shared blood with. He smiled a gratified smile at her. 

“I won’t.”

* * *

A quiet night at 12 Grimmauld place in June called for some entertainment in Mia’s mind. She loved to try to bring back some sense of normalcy to everyone’s lives, knowing they couldn’t survive off fear alone. Having some type of fun was an essential human right in her mind. She had set up a few poker tables, per Sirius’s idea, in the parlor room, a nice change of scenery from the large kitchen table they typically sat at for gatherings. The Black Family tapestry hung all around the room, bearing a few spots of charred black that Sirius and Mia had studied a few weeks prior. Quite a few order members decided to join Mia’s poker night, making Sirius delighted to have guests. Moody, Kingsley, Susan, Remus and Tonks were gathered around one table as Sirius dealt. Tonks was hanging on Kingsley’s arm, making Moody look incredibly uncomfortable. Susan and Remus sat on opposite sides of the table; she had stopped giving him nasty looks, but was still curt and tried ignore him as much as possible. Mia was bringing snacks and drinks up from the kitchen and setting them up on the spare table, loving playing the role as party host. She surveyed the table, realizing she had forgotten to get some scotch and vodka for her drinks.

“Fuck” she said, a little louder than intended.

“Amelia Evelyn!” Susan spat “language!”

“Sorry” she mumbled. “I forgot drinks. I’m going to have to run out.”

“I’ll come with you” Remus said, making to stand up.

“No, no, stay, really, I’ll be back in a jiffy.” She smiled, walking over and kissing his cheek.

Susan turned her eyes downward to avoid seeing Mia kiss him.

“Hey kitten, while you’re out, could you pick me up one of those muggle candy bars… oh what’s it called… galaxy??” Sirius asked.

“Milky way?” she chuckled. “Yeah, I’ll get you one. Anyone else need anything?”

Everyone shook their head and murmured. Mia turned on her heel and strode out of the parlor towards the entrance way of the house. She passed Kreacher on her way, who looked incredibly smug, even for himself. She frowned at him, curious as to way he looked so pleased with himself.

“Good evening Kreacher” she said with false politeness

Kreacher just scowled at her, so she kept walking. She could hear him muttering to himself as she made her way across the room

“The miss says good evening to Kreacher as if she is friendly, oh yes; Kreacher knows what a filthy muggle she comes from. Kreacher knows the things she does with the werewolf, yes, Kreacher hears everything. If only his mistress knew the things the half breed was doing in her house…”

Mia about hexed Kreacher right there, but forced herself to ignore him. She felt slightly unnerved hearing Kreacher talk about the ‘things’ she does with Remus. _Has this little shit been listening outside our room??_ This seemed impossible with the silencing charms they usually put up, and she certainly didn’t want to entertain the idea that Kreacher was in the room with them, so she shook it off and walked out the door.

* * *

The group was enjoying playing poker immensely. Kingsley and Tonks had helped themselves to snacks; Moody and Susan were lost in a conversation of an old case they worked on when Susan was new at the Ministry. Sirius and Remus were drinking what was left in the bottle of scotch that was at the house, eager for Mia to bring more. They all were caught off guard when a shimmering silver doe entered the parlor room, and spoke.

“Potter saw a vision of Black being tortured at the Department of Mysteries by the Dark Lord. He and his friends have disappeared from school; I believe them to be headed to London to try to save him. Dumbledore has been alerted as well.”

The voice of the silver doe belonged to Snape, the entire group jumping up at the news that the teens were traveling to London alone.

“IT’S A TRAP!” Sirius bellowed. “We need to go”

“Padfoot, we’ll go. You stay here” Remus said, jumping from his chair.

“Absolutely not, I’m coming. I’m not sitting back in this house and leaving my godson in the thwarts of death eaters!”

“Should we send a patronus to Mia?” Tonks asked, grabbing her cloak off the back of her chair.

“No, there’s no time!” Susan barked. “She is safer if she doesn’t come anyway”

Remus and Susan looked at each other, Remus nodding to her in agreement. Susan gave him a half smile, catching him off guard slightly.

“Come on, let’s go!” Moody gruffed.

With a loud crack, the entire group vanished.

* * *

Mia came bobbing into headquarters with a few bags of bottles she picked up, and a Milky Way bar for Sirius. The house seemed quieter than normal, and when she walked into the parlor, she was surprised to find it empty, the food she had set out still in its place. She figured they must’ve gone downstairs, so she made her way to the basement kitchen. She was caught off guard when she saw Albus Dumbledore standing there in brilliant cyan blue robes, talking to Kreacher. 

“Professor… where is everyone?” she asked with a puzzled expression. 

Dumbledore turned to her, his eyes shining a brilliant blue, but his expression was bleak. He relayed the information he extracted from Kreacher about how Voldemort used a vision of Sirius to lure Harry and his friends to the department of mysteries, and that he believed the Order members had followed when they received Snape’s patronus. 

“Why didn’t they send one to me??” she growled. “Professor, we need to go help them.” 

“Mia, it might be best if you stay here, in case any messages come though.” 

“No, Sir, with all due respect, I won’t just sit back.” She said, setting the bags down on the table. “Take me with you” she ordered, putting her hand on her hip. “Please.”

“Very well” Dumbledore sighed and stuck his left arm out. “You know, you are very much like your mother; stubborn and full of fury.”

Mia fought the urge to roll her eyes at this statement. She grabbed his arm and felt her entire body compress, all the air forced out of her, the feeling of being suffocated so strong. Just as she thought she needed a breath, she felt her feet hit the ground, and air in her lungs.

* * *

The Department of Mysteries was eerily dark, and when they found themselves in a large amphitheater room with a strange archway in the middle, Mia was shocked at the scene before her. Death eaters fighting Order members, jets of color flying in every which direction, blasting chunks of concrete from the walls and steps around them. Dumbledore began casting spells left and right, running down the large stone staircase, jumping into action. Mia saw Susan dueling with a tall, thin death eater, and ran to help her. Her eyes found Remus across the room from her, looking as if he was winning his battle. He was near Harry and Sirius in the middle of the room, dueling death eaters of their own. Mia began firing spells at the man Susan was fighting, jets of red, orange and purple light shooting quickly from her wand. Susan did a double take when she saw her daughter running to her aid, but quickly regaining her focus to the task at hand. Both of them shot out a jet of red towards the man, both spells hitting him square in the chest, causing him to fly back and land with a thud on the concrete step.

“Nice work” Susan said with a nod. 

Susan saw Dumbledore dueling over to her left, figuring they must come together. Knowing her daughter very well, she had to have put up a fight with him to get here. 

Mia turned and saw Tonks rolling down the stairs, having been stunned herself.

“Tonks!” she yelled, panic flooding through her as her body stopped rolling, one arm draped over the side of the step she had come to rest on.

She turned to run to her, but Susan held her back and threw up a protego charm to shield both of them from a hex coming their way. Susan then sent a stun at the death eater Mia didn’t see, and he flew back as well. 

“Stay alert, Mia!” Susan hissed. 

Mia nodded, and carefully made her way with Susan over to Tonks on the other side of the room. Mia knelt down and rolled her over onto her back, patting her face gently.

“Tonks??” she said, shaking her friend. “Come on, come on…” 

Susan was throwing up shield charms around them, while Moody was nearby and sending hexes furiously. Kingsley was dueling two death eaters at once, fighting with tremendous skill and ability.

“Rennervate!” Mia cried, pointing her wand at Tonks’s chest.

A jet of red light shot from her wand, hitting Tonks and making her jump. Mia waited a moment to see if Tonks would open her eyes, but nothing.

“Rennervate!” she shouted again, hitting her with another jet of light. 

Mia repeated this a few more times as Susan shielded them from rebounding spells.

“Tonks, come on” she said through gritted teeth. “NYMPHADORA, WAKE UP!”

Mia hit Tonks again with a shot of red light, her eyes fluttering open to half slits.

“Don’t call me Nymphadora…” she muttered weakly, mustering a small grin.

“Then don’t fucking scare me like that again” Mia breathed, smiling and kissing her friend’s forehead in relief.

“Dora??” Kingsley called as he ran over, kneeling on the other side of Tonks. 

His two death eaters were lying in a heap against the far wall, immobile. He had a large head gash above his brow, blood trickling down his face and dropping onto his purple robes.

“Hey” Tonks croaked, mustering up a stronger smile for him.

She tried to sit up, but Mia held her back down.

“Tonks, stay down. Just rest” she ordered.

She and Kingsley nodded to each other, he nonverbally thanking her for helping Tonks. Mia stood up and turned her head, surveying the scene. Remus was finishing off his death eater from before, and Sirius was now caught in a duel with his cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange. 

“Come on, Bella, is that all you got??” he jeered at her, sending flashes of purple, orange and blue at her.

Mia felt fear strike in the pit of her stomach. He was brandishing his wand magnificently, as if he was doing some part of an elaborate dance. It was slowing him down.

_“His bravado is his weakness”_ she remembered Remus whispering to her when she was preparing to duel him that fall.

Almost as if it happened in slow motion, Mia saw Sirius get hit in the chest by a flash of red, causing him to sway and fall through the mysterious archway, disappearing through it. Bellatrix let out a cackle of high pitched laughter as the curtain fluttered, and then came to rest. 

“NO!!!” Mia screamed, almost simultaneously as Harry did. 

Harry tried to fling himself after Sirius, but Remus came up behind him and held him back, holding him firmly to keep him from running through the archway. Mia dropped to her knees, trembling and fighting back sobs that threatened to escape her throat. Susan held tightly onto her shoulders, her own hands shaking. Mia wasn’t exactly sure what that archway was, but she got the unnerving, sickening feeling that through the archway was a one way trip. Her sobs won the fight, her entire world began to spin and she slunk down onto the floor, Susan trying to hold her upright. She didn’t want to believe it, but part of her knew for certain, that Sirius Black was dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really wanted to keep Sirius alive for this fic, but as JK Rowling required him to die during the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, so did I.


	32. chapter 32

The Daily Prophet was buzzing with articles about Harry as the Chosen One, Voldemort’s return and Cornelius Fudge’s sacking. Headlines of killings and disappearances were popping up every few days, The Order very sad to see the murder of fellow member Emmaline Vance, and head of magical law enforcement Amelia Bones. People seemed to be getting plucked off like flies, the disappearing numbers unsettling most of the wizarding world, including Susan. She was terrified John would be a target again, due to her status as an Auror and him being a muggle. These people considered muggle hunting a sport, and obtaining a muggle from a high security military base would be entertaining for some of these vicious death eaters. Rufus Scrimgeour, previous head of the Auror office and now Minister of Magic, ensured her that he was taking care of everything, no need to worry; he would do much better for the situation than Fudge did.

Sirius made many headlines also, his story coming out and his name now cleared posthumously. News of the battle at the Department of Mysteries was also a topic of gossip around town; many of the death eaters were captured and placed in Azkaban as a result. Harry wasn’t the only person riddled with grief and anger over Sirius’s death, most of the Order was taken aback by his loss. Remus was putting on a brave face for the group, while Tonks was moping around most of the time. She was having a hard time metamorphing, and even Kingsley struggled to bring a smile to her face. Mia was beside herself; nearly unable to function she was so riddled with grief.

Mia sat on the floor of her bedroom, her back pressed up against the left side of her bed, staring at the wall. Her mind was unable to settle, her thoughts had been racing since the moment she saw Sirius fall through the archway in the Department of Mysteries. Her life felt like it was separated into two periods; Before Sirius and After Sirius. Anything she did now felt like firsts; first timing showering after Sirius died, first time she wore her trainers after Sirius died, first time she drank coffee after Sirius died. Her stomach churned with anguish, feeling the urge to vomit regularly over the last month since that evening at the Department of Mysteries. Remus, Penelope and Susan were a revolving door checking in on her, their kind words and attempts at comforting her irritating. She especially hated the copious amounts of food they brought in her bedroom at meal time. Every bite slid down her throat like glass, making her stomach bubble irritably. She did try to take a few bites, but it was never enough for them. 

Everything reminded her of Sirius; black dogs walking down the street, the deck of cards they used to play with that now sat on her dresser, and Remus. She saw Sirius every time she looked at him, remembering all the fun times they had together. They had been the three musketeers; Mia always admired a photograph Penelope took of them the night she snuck Sirius to their flat for a night of drunken debauchery, but now the photograph made her angry. Sirius was gone before his time, taken away from her, and memories of him were just that now; memories.

Remus reminded her so much of better times that it made her sick to look him in the eye. He was being so kind to her; so attentive and patient. His demeanor should’ve been comforting, but it only made Mia irritable and short tempered. She felt so lonely, despite his constant hovering. She could barely speak for the first few days, leaving the job of breaking the news to Penelope on Remus’s shoulders. Penelope had sobbed with her head in his lap for almost an hour, begging him to not tell Mia how upset she had gotten. 

The Order had vacated 12 Grimmauld Place temporarily, unsure of where Kreacher and the house’s loyalty lie with the enchantments placed on the estate. The Weasley’s offered up the Burrow as a temporary headquarters, for which they extended Remus an invitation to have him and Mia stay with them for the weekend, hoping that surrounding her with people that care about her would help her grieving. 

“Mia, honey, may I come in?” Remus asked, knocking on her bedroom door softly.

Mia didn’t answer, her gaze remained fixed on the wall in front of her. Remus sat on the edge of the bed, and looked down at her. Her eyes were puffy, and she looked paler than typical. 

“Molly invited us to spend the weekend at the Burrow; I told her yes, I thought you would enjoy a weekend away” he said softly.

“It’s a full moon tomorrow” she replied flatly.

“They have a cellar that Arthur has fashioned into a den for me” Remus chuckled. “So, you’ll come?”

Mia just shrugged at him “I guess”

“Would you like me to pack your bag for you? I can do that while you’re freshening up.”

He put one hand on her shoulder softly, but she shook him away.

“I can pack my own bag, Remus.” she spat, getting up hastily and walking to the bathroom, slamming the door shut.

Remus sighed and followed her to the bathroom door, pressing his cheek against it. He heard her start the shower, which was a good sign that she was actually getting ready to go.

“Ok, I’ll be in the living room” he called to her, but received no reply.

 

Upon arriving at the Burrow late that evening, Molly ushered her and Remus upstairs to the small bedroom plastered with Gryffindor quidditch banners and posters of dragons. Molly had cleaned up Charlie’s old bedroom for them to stay in. The comforter was a hand patched quilt, and there was a small dresser and mirror that sat across from bed. A small oil lamp sat on the dresser, and there was a large window on the left side of the bed that would most likely let in so much light it would wake them at sunrise. 

“I know it’s not much…” Molly began

“Molly, this will do fine. Thank you for your hospitality.” Remus said warmly. “Mia, would you like me to unpack for you?”

Mia ignored him, and turned to Molly. 

“uhm, where is the loo?” she asked quietly, her glum demeanor very uncharacteristic to what Molly was used to.

“Down the hall, on the right. Are you hungry? I can put some soup on if so” Molly said brightly, overcompensating for Mia’s gloomy mood.

“No, thank you” Mia mumbled, her eyes looking down at the floor.

“What was the last thing you ate?” Remus asked

“I had some crackers at 3:00” she said

“Oh dear that’s hardly enough food, I’ll make you something…” Molly began

“I’m not hungry!” Mia snapped

Molly jumped slightly and looked taken aback. Remus shook his head at Molly, giving her an apologetic look.

“Alright, well, let me know if you change your mind.” She mustered up a weak smile and exited the room.

Mia grabbed her toothbrush and pajamas hastily to head off to the bathroom, but was stopped by Remus’s hand gripping her shoulder.

“Please be nice to Molly, she is only trying to help” he said firmly.

She turned and glared at him, ripping her shoulder from his grip and storming out of the bedroom. He exhaled an irritated sigh. He knew she was upset at losing Sirius, but his increasing aggression coming from the looming cycle was making it hard to remain understanding. She was starting to get under his skin with her outbursts, making it harder for him to remain calm. He was grieving over Sirius himself, but felt unable to show it, feeling as though he needed to put on a brave face.

* * *

The members of the Order were sitting around the dining room table at the Burrow the next morning, consuming the wonderful breakfast spread Molly had made. The table was filled with muffins, toast and breakfast pastries, while the kitchen stove had pans of bacon, eggs and hash browns. The hearty smell of the various foods wafted through the kitchen, smelling like the Hogwarts’ kitchens minutes before a feast. The Weasleys were hoping that a community meal would help make everyone feel more ‘normal’ after suffering a loss of one of their own.

Mia sat at the very edge of the table, sipping a cup of coffee quietly. Tonks sat directly to her left, next to Kingsley; the two of them trying to decipher which muffins were which in the basket. Susan sat on the other side of them, and was in a deep conversation with Arthur, sitting across from her, about muggle medicine. 

“So, they cut you open, and then _remove_ it??” Arthur asked her, fascinated by the idea of appendix surgery.

Remus walked over to the table with two plates of food in his hand, setting one down in front of Mia and sitting across from her. He grabbed a piece of toast and added it to her plate. She looked down at the assortment of food, and her stomach flip flopped. Normally a plate of bacon, eggs and hash browns would be delicious to her, but she wanted to gag at the sight of food. 

“Eat” Remus said casually, taking a bite out of a banana nut muffin. 

“I’m not hungry” she said quietly.

Remus looked up at her, watching her fidget with her coffee cup. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying the night before, and her face was starting to look sunken in from a month of only eating the bare minimum.

“Just start by taking a bite” he said, looking back down at his plate and gathering some egg on his fork.

Mia took a small bite of her hash brown, taking a moment to chew. The bite went down her throat like glass, making her turn her nose up and push her plate slightly away from her.

“You need to eat.” Remus said; his voice more stern than before.

“I’m not hungry” she replied.

“Mia, your face is starting to look thin; eat” he spoke a little too loudly, making the conversations of the other members stop and look at them.

“I said, I’m not hungry!” She hissed, shooting daggers out of her eyes.

Remus slammed his hands on the table, making everyone jump in her chair.

“MIA GODDAMNIT!” He shouted, his face turning purple with rage. “I’m not going to sit here at watch you starve yourself; you’re not leaving this table until that food is gone!”

The entire table was quiet, Susan’s eyes were darting back and forth between them, and Arthur was shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Mia was gripping her now empty coffee mug tightly to keep her hands from shaking, she and Remus staring at each other heatedly. The full moon was that night; she remembered seeing his potion sitting on the dresser in Charlie’s room before she came downstairs.

“Go drink your potion” She said through gritted teeth.

He stared at her for a moment, eyes burning, and then got up from the table, noisily scooching the chair back as he rose.

“I want half that plate of food gone by the time I get back.” He said sharply, turning to exit.

Mia felt her blood boiling; how dare he raise his voice when he knew what she was going through? Anger and adrenaline coursed through her as she stood up, baseball-throwing her coffee mug at him. Susan quickly shot her wand out, stopping the coffee cup in midair. Remus turned back to look at Mia, clenching and unclenching his jaw a couple times before choosing to leave the kitchen again. Mia stared at the coffee cup suspended in air as Susan walked over to it, taking it in her hand and returning it to her. 

“Don’t take your anger out on him, sweetie. He doesn’t deserve it.” Susan whispered firmly. “Now eat, before you say or do something else you may regret.”

 

Remus walked into the bedroom, slamming the door shut and hastily grabbing his potion off the dresser. He downed it in a couple gulps, smacking his tongue against the roof of mouth in disgust at the foul taste. He sat on the bed and looked at himself in the mirror that hung on the wall across from him. His face was pale and his dark circles were more pronounced, a common side effect this close to the moon. He took a deep breath and ran his hands through his hair furiously. He wasn’t sure if he could handle this anymore. He was putting on a brave face, and bottling in his feelings. He couldn’t grieve freely because he was so concerned about taking care of everyone else. Watching Mia was the hardest part of all this, it pained him to see her unable to eat, withering away to skin and bone. A few tears escaped from his eyes as he rested his head against his fists, staring down at the wood floor. He needed to buck up, be strong like he had been, but he felt like there was no strength left in him. He wanted his friend back. He needed his friend back. 

 

Mia choked down bites of food with tears streaming down her face. The food didn’t taste bad, the flavor was quite good actually, but her body was fighting each bite as it slid down her throat. She had gotten a good majority of it down before she started to choke and gag on a piece of egg, nearly having to run to the kitchen sink to hurl up what she had just consumed. Molly hastily came over to her and patted her back gently; look at her ¾ eaten plate. 

“That should be enough for now, what do you think, Susan?” Molly asked in a kind, soft voice. “She ate at least most of it”

“Yes, it’s a start” Susan said, giving Molly a nod.

Molly swiftly removed Mia’s plate, everyone else at the table averting their eyes from her as she wiped her tears.

“I’m going to take a shower” Mia said in a whisper, and rose from the table.

She walked quietly upstairs to Charlie’s bedroom, to find the door shut. She paused when she rested her hand on the door knob, and put her ear up to the door instead. She heard a deep muffled sound coming from inside, and tried to turn the knob as quietly as possible. Remus had locked the door, the knob not budging. She listened for another moment and realized he was crying. She felt a pang of remorse as she contemplated unlocking the door with magic, but hesitated. He would’ve locked the door only for one reason; he wanted to be alone.

She turned and tip toed back downstairs, not wanting Remus to hear her, and entered the kitchen.

“Remus wants to be alone so I am going to go home” Mia said flatly, picking her fingernails.

“You want some company? I can go with you, stay for a few hours?” Tonks said, Kingsley squeezing her shoulder reassuringly.

“No, I’m fine.” Mia said, as she stepped into the other room and disapparated.

“Susan, she is a mess” Kingsley said once he knew she had gone.

“I know, I know” Susan said, her voice breaking. “She and Sirius were very close.”

“Remus isn’t taking it well, either. He’s put on such a brave face for everyone, it’s no wonder he snapped.” Arthur said.

“We’re all not taking it well.” Tonks whispered, her face falling.

Kingsley kissed her shoulder reassuringly. Molly began cleaning up the table, tears stinging her eyes that she wanted to keep hidden from the rest of the group. Everyone was silent for a few minutes. Susan shifted in her chair awkwardly before standing up and speaking again. 

“I don’t mean to rush out…” she began.

“No problem, Susan. Molly is planning dinner after the meeting next week if you can stay” Arthur said, standing to walk her out.

“Thanks, Arthur. I’ll be there.” Susan said with a weak smile. 

She turned and exited the kitchen before Arthur could have a chance to walk her out. She hesitated when she walked by the staircase, considering walking up to Charlie’s bedroom to check on Remus. She felt for him in this moment; he had lost his best friend, and yet was still so comforting and accommodating to Mia in her grief. She felt a surge of thankfulness that he was there to help take care of her; a feeling she never expected herself to feel. She sighed, unsure of what she would even say in this moment, and chose to exit the Burrow, disapparating on the lawn.

* * *

Mia was sitting on the couch, hair wet and in a bathrobe at her flat, watching mindless American reality television shows when Penelope came out of her bedroom to join her. They sat awkwardly on the couch for few minutes, tension in the room thick enough to cut with a butter knife.

“Where is Remus tonight?” Penelope asked, breaking the silence.

“Full moon” Mia said, her eyes still fixed on the television.

“That didn’t answer my question…”

Mia sighed and rolled her eyes. “He’s at the Weasleys still, spending the cycle in the cellar.”

“Why aren’t you there with him?” Penelope asked.

“We got into a fight because I wouldn’t eat breakfast.” She said flatly. 

“Maybe you should go back, talk to him in the morning. I’m sure he’d like you to be there.” Penelope said.

Mia felt her irritation rising, but fought snapping at Penelope.

“I was rude to Molly, I don’t think I’m welcome.” She said, crossing her arms.

“I’m sure she will understand, I think you should at least try…” 

“PENNY!” Mia hissed, raising her voice. “Stop”

“Ok, I’m done with this. You need to get your attitude in check. I have been more than accommodating with giving you the last month off work, but you’ve done nothing but sulk in your room, and have been a bitch to me, Remus and your mum since Sirius died. We’re trying to help you!” Penelope cried, standing up and putting her hand on her hip.

“Well, maybe if you didn’t try to force feed me when I’m not hungry, I’d be a little nicer!” Mia scowled.

“Maybe if you’d eat, we wouldn’t have to!!! You think Sirius would want to watch you starve??”

There was an awkward, tense pause between them; the only sound was the television chattering in the background.

“I miss him so much Penelope.” Mia said softly, beginning to pick her fingernails.

“I know, Mia. We all do. But we need you to get ahold of yourself.” Penelope tried to say gently, but her words came out a little more forceful than anticipated.

Mia shot her an irritated look, and stood up to head back to her bedroom. She stopped in the doorway and turned back,

“He might’ve just been a fuck buddy to you, but he was my best friend. I was his _family_.” She sneered, and slammed her bedroom door. 

Penelope’s chin quivered as she sat down slowly on the couch. She pulled her sweatshirt sleeve up; her right hand touching the black leather band of Sirius’s watch that was fastened to her left wrist. She closed her eyes and remembered the morning he gave it to her. 

“ _Thank you for making me feel like a man again_ ” he had told her, the tenderness in his smile had made Penelope feel warm all the way down to her toes.

Mia didn’t know about the watch, and Penelope wasn’t sure if she now would ever tell her. It was an intimate moment between her and Sirius, and she wanted to keep it that way. She began to sob, curling up on the couch into the smallest ball she could make herself, clutching the watch and her wrist close to her heart.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Mia increasingly got more short and irritable with everyone. Remus and Mia did not speak of the breakfast fiasco that happened at the Weasleys, their conversations limited to short questions and one word answers. She could hardly look at him, the memories he brought to the surface were too painful. She had at least returned to work, but mostly kept to herself taking inventory and stocking shelves rather than speak with customers. She had no desire to do much of anything; she had begun sleeping during the day when she would get home from work, then having her recurring nightmares wake her up in the middle of the night, leaving her to stare at the ceiling while Remus snored softly next to her. The sound of his breathing annoyed her; she resented him for treating her so nicely, irritated by how well he seemed to be doing with Sirius’s death. The scene of Sirius falling through the mysterious archway had made it into her recurring set of nightmares, making her heart ache every time she woke from it. Everything seemed difficult to her; just simply washing her hair seemed like a daunting task. She found it easier to ignore her responsibilities rather than tackle them head on. Her Auror application sat only half filled out on her dresser, too overwhelming to finish. It was easier to pretend it didn’t exist. She didn’t feel excitement when thinking about starting her career; but she didn’t feel excited about really anything anymore.

For her 21st birthday, Remus whisked Mia away to the cottage for the weekend to try to get her out of the rut of her flat. He hoped a romantic weekend away would lift her spirits, and maybe re-spark some of the fire that she used to have. He tried so hard to be understanding, but he missed her. He missed the vibrant, fierce woman he loved. He missed her laugh, her smile, and her jokes. Sirius’s death had left him with a hollow imitation of her; she looked and sounded like her, but she wasn’t the same. She wouldn’t let him hardly touch her, or hardly even look at him. The only time he could hold her is when she slept; He would snuggle up next to her, hoping he wouldn’t wake her and get shaken off. _if I can just get her through this, she’ll come back to me_ he would tell himself, over and over, praying one day to see a spark of the old her.

He planned a magnificent birthday weekend of all her favorites; dinner and dessert the first night, then kayaking and swimming on the lake the following day. He spent hours preparing the meal and decorating the cottage with the many candles that he used when making her dinner nearly a year and a half ago that put a smile on her face. When he apparated back with her, he was disappointed to see the décor didn’t have the same effect. She hardly touched her pasta he had made for them for dinner, and didn’t even seem interested in her cheesecake. Cheesecake was her favorite, but she took a couple bites then pushed it to the side, claiming she was ‘stuffed’. Remus didn’t fight her, despite wanting to argue that 6 bites of pasta and 2 bites of cheesecake wasn’t a sufficient meal. 

She went to bed early, leaving him to spend the rest of the night drinking scotch on the porch, memories of Sirius haunting him. He wished with all his might to have his friend back. He wished to have James and Lily back; even part of him wished that he could have Peter back, despite hating him more than he hated anyone. He wouldn’t hate him if James and Lily were still here. He wished Peter never betrayed the Potters, maybe if he hadn’t they could all be sitting on the porch together; laughing and drinking scotch together. He imagined Mia and Lily brewing hangover potions on one side of the porch as the four men threw back shots, Sirius smacking Peter’s back as he choked on firewhisky. This thought made him smile, but his chest tightening in anguish at the realization that he could never experience this. All his friends were dead, or traitors. He sipped his scotch and hung his head. Mia was all he had, and he was afraid he was losing her too.

 

“Auror application deadline was yesterday, wasn’t it?” Remus asked between bites of his sandwich the following afternoon.

“Yeah” Mia shrugged, picking her fingernails

“You got your application in, right?” 

“Yeah” 

Remus raised an eyebrow at her, picking up on her tone as dishonest.

“You did?”

“No” she said softly.

Remus set his sandwich down on his plate, giving her a stern look. “And why not? You’ve wanted to be an Auror for as long as I’ve known you.”

Mia just shrugged as she picked at her fingernails.

“Mia, you can’t just throw away your career because you didn’t feel like applying. Do you know how lucky you are to have the NEWT scores you do??” Remus said firmly.

Mia huffed loudly and got up from the couch and begun to pace.

“Maybe I don’t want to be an Auror” she said irritably

“Then what do you want to be?” he asked, more calmly than before.

“I don’t know”

Remus exhaled a heavy sigh and shook his head in disappointment. He knew this conversation was going nowhere.

“Come here, eat half my sandwich” he said, motioning for her to return to the couch.

“I’m not hungry” she said, crossing her arms

“Mia, your face is sinking in, you need to eat something!” Remus growled

“I had some toast at 11:00!” she hissed, irritated by his constant helicoptering over her eating habits.

“Three bites of toast doesn’t count.” He said flatly, setting his sandwich plate down on the coffee table in front of him.

“Oh my god, can you just leave it?!” she yelled, stomping her feet. “You’re not my mother!”

“Maybe not, but your mother agrees with me on this. You can’t keep doing this to yourself.” He said, his voice returning to a level of calmness that drove Mia mad.

She stared at him with a burning gaze, her stomach doing flip flops. When she looked at him, the memories of the two of them and Sirius flashed through her mind. She was starting to hate to look at Remus, his face was a constant reminder that it was just the two of them in the world, and that Sirius could never laugh with them again, be with them again. 

“Both of you need to just get off my case and leave me the hell alone!” she hollered, walking into the bedroom and grabbing her bag.

Remus followed her, his temper rising.

“Leave you the hell alone, huh? That’s what you want? That’s the thanks I get for taking care of you through all this?” he yelled, his face turning purple. “In case you hadn’t noticed, I lost my best friend too!” 

“I never asked you to take care of me!” she hissed. “I don’t need you to!”

Mia stormed back into the living room towards the front door, Remus close on her heels.

“Oh, my mistake, I guess I won’t make sure you don’t starve yourself to death.” he sneered.

“Piss off, Remus. I’m done.” She spat, grabbing her sweatshirt off the coat rack by the front door and grasping the doorknob.

“Done? Oh, you’re done?” he asked incredulously, raising his voice. “Whatever happened to forever and always?”

Mia froze with her hand on the door knob; part of her knew she was being stupid. That part of her wanted to run back, jump into his arms and cry, but the other half was ready to storm out the door. She loved him, she knew she did, but she couldn’t look at his face anymore without being constantly reminded of Sirius. Her heart couldn’t take the reel of memories that flashed through her head every time she looked at him. Her hand shook on the door knob, her body frozen for a moment as she felt Remus’s stare on the back of her head.

“Don’t walk out that door, Mia” he said sternly.

Mia took a breath, not looking back at him. Her logical side of her brain screamed at her to turn around, hug him and beg for forgiveness, to tell him she loved him and she was sorry for how much she had pushed him away; but Mia turned the doorknob, walked out the door and disapparated on the front lawn.


	33. chapter 33

When the Order gathered for their meeting the following week, Mia felt her stomach churn at the thought of seeing Remus. They hadn’t spoken since their fight, Mia wasn’t even sure that she had ended it with him. It’s not that she didn’t want to be with Remus; it was that she couldn’t be. She couldn’t even look at him. Part of her knew it was stupid to push him away, but she ignored her own logic and gave into her depression. Her ears felt hot when she sensed that he entered the room, forcing herself to keep her eyes down rather than look up at him.

When Remus walked into the kitchen and saw Mia sitting at one end of the table, he felt his heart flutter. She looked hollow, her eyes and cheekbones looked sunk in, and her skin had a lifelessness to it that wasn’t typical. Her hair looked frizzed and dull, compared to its usual silky smooth texture. He felt sadness wash over him as she continued to stare at the table in front of her, rather than look up at him. He sat at the opposite side of the table from her, getting silent mimes from Tonks and Arthur, curious as to why he didn’t sit with her. He caught a sympathetic look from Susan, which surprised him tremendously.

“Thank you all for coming…” Dumbledore started.

Remus was thankful that Dumbledore stood on the opposite side of him from where Mia was sitting, so he wouldn’t have to pretend to not look at her.

“We are experiencing increasing disappearances and murders, so we all need to remain in contact with family members that we don’t see regularly, telling them to keep an eye out for suspicious behavior and to take care when travelling alone. Shortly after Emmaline’s murder, a muggle family that was cousins of hers was murdered in their beds”

“The Dark Lord is allowing his followers free reign to kidnap and kill whomever they please” Snape added, his signature sneer present in his voice.

“Have you heard anything about their possible targets, Severus?” Dumbledore asked, looking over his half-moon spectacles at him.

“Not a definite plan, but Dolohov has been speaking of Susan quite a bit.”

Susan’s eyes shot over to Snape, listening intently as she slunk in her chair slightly, her stomach flip-flopping. Mia was only half paying attention, staring at a scratch on the table in front of her.

“He is still angry for his arrest of the murders of Gideon and Fabian Prewett” Snape added

“Then he shouldn’t’ve murdered them if he didn’t want to go to Azkaban for it!” She hissed, Molly’s face twisting as she remembered her deceased brothers.

“Susan, I think a Fidelius charm would be wise, just to be safe.” Dumbledore said, looking slightly crestfallen. “We are also outnumbered by 2:1. Voldemort has the dementors and giants on his side; we need to try to sway people and creatures to join our cause if we are to hope to defeat him again.” 

Remus snuck a glance at Mia, staring vacantly at the table and refusing to move her eyes. He felt so lonely in that moment; the woman he loved wouldn’t even look at him.

“I’ll go join a pack. There’s a large one just outside of Bath; I should be able to sway the werewolves after a couple full moon cycles.” he said. 

Mia’s eyes flew up to him, her attention snapping back to reality. Her heart began to pound, she wasn’t sure if she had heard correctly. Remus caught her eye for a split second, but his gaze returned to Dumbledore.

“Excellent Remus, thank you. Now…” Dumbledore continued to speak, but Mia didn’t hear a single word of the rest of the meeting.

 

When the meeting adjourned, Mia was the first one to get up, her chair squeaking loudly as she jumped up and hustled out of the kitchen, eyes downcast. Susan had tried to say something to her as she was getting up, but Mia ignored her and stormed out. A familiar crack was heard from the other room, letting everyone in the kitchen know Mia had disapparated. The room was silent from the awkward tension; the members of the Order quietly began to make their way to leave.

“Kingsley, can I have a word?” Susan said to her partner as they were standing.

“Yeah, Susie, what’s up?” he said as they stepped into the corner of the room.

Susan waited until most of the room had cleared out; the only people left in the room were Arthur, Remus and Dumbledore. She spoke just above a whisper 

“Would you be my Secret Keeper?”

“The Fidelius charm is a great idea…” Kingsley began “but I don’t think it should be me as the Secret Keeper. I’m a little too expected”

“Who do you suggest then?” she asked in a hushed voice.

Kingsley smiled “Hey Remus, can we have a word?” he called, making Susan cringe slightly.

“Yeah, what can I do for you?” Remus said as he walked over to them.

“Susie’s Secret Keeper— I think it should be you”

“Me? Why me?” he asked incredulously

“I’m too obvious, and with you leaving London now, I think you would be a more secure choice” Kingsley said confidently.

Susan blinked at Remus, feeling awkward that he, of all people, would be Kingsley’s first choice. She couldn’t argue with his logic though; Remus wouldn’t be the first person Dolohov or the Death Eaters to suspect as the Secret Keeper.

“I would appreciate it, Remus” she said softly.

“I’d be honored. I’ll do it” he said with a warm smile.

“Great, now join hands…” Kingsley said as he drew his wand.

Susan and Remus looked at each other as they grasped their hands together, feeling a ribbon of magic swirl around them as Kingsley cast the Fidelius charm. Susan felt a wave of gratitude for Remus, feeling guilty that she had treated him so harshly over the past year. Sure, she didn’t agree with how he and Mia began seeing each other, but she couldn’t deny that he had proved himself a good man to her a few times over.

* * *

Remus prepared his bag to take with him with a heavy heart. He packed just a few of his older clothing, his toothbrush, and all of his wolfsbane vials that remained in his stash. He was hoping by sharing some of the potion with the pack would earn him merit. His heart ached with the thought of Mia. It pained him to think of being away from her for an indeterminate amount of time, but he was certain she didn’t want him here. _She won’t even look at you_ he told himself as he was placing the wolfsbane vials into his bag. He stopped when he saw a glint of gold on his wrist when his sleeve shifted. He pulled up his right sleeve to reveal the bracelet that connected him with Mia, the one that would vibrate if the other was in danger. He traced his finger along the bracelets smooth surface, wondering if she were still wearing hers. He took out his wand to tap the bracelet, but froze. He took a breath, contemplating whether or not to take it off. She was all he had left, but did he really have her? Was he holding on to some fantasy by continuing to wear it? After a moment, he slid his wand back into his pocket, and pulled his sleeve back over the thin, gold band, and grabbed his bag to leave. There wasn’t any harm in wearing it just a little bit longer, right? He shook his head, knowing he needed to focus on his mission; he couldn’t let his emotions get in the way. They needed numbers on the Order’s side, and he was one that could do something about it.

He stepped out onto the lawn and took a deep breath, Mia’s face coming to mind again. He would’ve given anything to hold her again, to kiss her, to make love to her. He wanted nothing more than to be with her in this moment, to wrap her in his arms and stare into her enchanting hazel eyes that gave him goosebumps. He closed his eyes, reminding himself of his mission, and with a pop, was gone.

* * *

The months since Remus left had been some of the darkest moments of Mia’s life. She spent most of her evenings at a few different muggle bars she became a regular at. Everyone loved her; she was the life of the party. Out every night, taking shots with groups while shooting billiards with others, and got on a first name basis with most of the bartenders. She was numb, she felt nothing. She told everyone she was having ‘the time of her life’ but all her partying was her subconscious trying to make sense of her depression. She thought she had ‘gotten over it’, and was in denial that anything was wrong. She did her best to push any thoughts of Remus or Sirius out of her head, using alcohol and some newly discovered drugs to mask her pain. Susan and Penelope both expressed concerns for Mia’s erratic behavior, which got them the cold shoulder most days from her. Despite her being driven by her emotions and a bit of a hothead, she wasn’t usually this reckless and self-destructive. Penelope was at least thankful that she was showing up to work, despite her usual hangovers for her morning shifts.

“Come out with me Friday” Mia said to Penelope as they stocked the white wine shelf.

“I don’t know, Mia…” she said softly, as she was checking off bottles on her clipboard.

“Come on, Penny, you never come out. Joe will hook us up.” Mia said causally.

“Who the hell is Joe?” Penelope asked as her nose scrunched.

“The bartender at Top Hats, He’s my favorite” Mia rolled her eyes. “Come on, say yes. Come have fun with me”

Penelope sighed. It had been a while since she had been out. She had dove head first into her work duties to distract herself from all the drama that surrounded Sirius’s death, Mia, and the wizarding world. She figured she should go; at least she’d be able to keep an eye on Mia while they were out. Susan had informed Penelope of the many unexplained disappearances and murders; something her and Susan feared would happen if Mia went out by herself and left a bar with the wrong person.

“Fine— But I don’t want to stay out all night.” She said flatly.

Mia giggled and hugged Penelope. “YAY, we’re going to have so much fun. I’ll see if Tonks can come too”

Mia trotted off to the back of the store with a wide grin on her face. Bruce smiled at her as he shuffled from the employee bathroom to return to the cash register up front. Penelope had followed her, watching Mia cast a patronus that bolted out of the store through the back wall. 

“Mia!” Penelope cried angrily

“What?” she laughed.

“You can’t do magic here! What if Bruce saw you???” Penelope whispered, looking at Mia incredulously.

“He didn’t, so relax” she rolled her eyes and walked back to the front of the store.

Unbelievable…” Penelope grumbled under her breath, shaking her head.

* * *

That weekend, Tonks arrived at Mia and Penelope’s flat, dressed in ripped jeans and sporting collarbone length bright green hair.

“Hi Tonks” Penelope said, opening the door and staring at her hair.

“Wotcher, Penny” Tonks said, entering the flat. “How is she today?” she added, whispering. 

"She seems ok, but a little too eager to party. I’m not going to drink much to keep an eye on her.” Penelope said, looking over her shoulder to make sure Mia wasn’t out of her bedroom yet. 

“Yeah, I’ve been watching her; the Order has been worried. She goes out every night. She’s been extremely reckless since Remus left…” Tonks whispered, but was interrupted by Mia walking out of her bedroom, dressed in a very short, tight black dress. 

Mia was still thinner than her normal weight, for which she had bought new party clothes in a smaller size so she didn’t look like she was wearing paper bags everywhere. 

“Hey Tonks, nice hair!” Mia winked, giving her a hug. “You sexy babes ready to party?” 

Penelope and Tonks looked at each other with nervous smiles. 

“Oh come on, it’ll be fun!” Mia giggled, grabbing her wallet from the table next to the door. “Let’s go.”

Mia, Tonks and Penelope walked into Top Hats to find it a smoky, crowded, dimly lit dive bar. They shook off the chill from the late November air as Mia trotted right up to a handsome bartender wearing a backwards ball cap, leaning over the bar to kiss him on the cheek. Tonks and Penelope walked up behind her nervously, slipping their coats off and draping them over one arm. 

“Joe, can you make something special for me and my girlfriends here?” Mia asked, twirling a piece of her smooth black hair around her finger. 

“Sure thing, baby, anything for you; who are your friends?” Joe said, winking at Mia before turning his attention to Tonks and Penelope, standing behind her shyly. 

“This is Tonks and Penelope” Mia giggled, motioning to the two girls behind her. 

“Tonks?” Joe crinkled his nose and gave Tonks a large grin. 

“It’s my surname” she replied coolly. 

“Surname, eh? What’s your first name?” Joe grinned. 

“It’s Nymphadora” Mia whispered, winking and leaning in to the bar. 

“Nymphadora, how exotic” Joe winked at Tonks, who returned a scowl. 

“Don’t call me that.” she hissed. 

“Fine, baby, Tonks it is” Joe chuckled, handing the girls 3 large glasses of a special mix. “First drink is on me.”

“Just water for me, actually!” Tonks said, scrunching her face apologetically at the already prepared drink.

Mia rolled her eyes “its fine ill drink it” she said, walking towards the tables with drinks in both hands.

“No worries baby, I respect a designated driver” Joe winked at Tonks.

Mia, Tonks and Penelope situated themselves at a tall pub table, and began chatting over their drinks, Mia sucking hers down quickly. They had to speak very loudly in order to be heard due to the loud music in the bar.

So Mia, I didn’t see your name on the Auror applicant list” Tonks said, taking a sip of water.

“I didn’t apply” Mia shrugged, slurping the last bit of her drink. “I’m going to refill, I’ll be back with shots”

Tonks turned to Penelope, her face twisted with concern. 

“What does she mean she didn’t apply??” Tonks hissed.

“Just that; don’t ask her about it here, trust me…” Penelope said looking over her shoulder.

Mia had come in contact with a tall, heavy set man on her way to the bar. He passed her something inconspicuous before she trotted off to grab a drink, then disappearing from their line of view.

“What’s that about?” Tonks asked, eyeing Mia talking to Joe at the bar as he poured them shots.

“Hell if I know, she’s getting herself into a lot these days” Penelope replied grimly.

The girls watched Mia as she kissed Joe the bartender’s cheek and hustled back to the table with three shots and a large cocktail for herself.

“Ok ladies, bottoms up!” she cheered, taking her shot.

Tonks threw her shot over her shoulder while Mia and Penelope were distracted by drinking theirs. She smacked her tongue, pretending to experience the burning sensation of a shot so Mia wouldn’t realize she didn’t drink it. Mia pulled the inconspicuous item the heavy man had given her from her bra, which was revealed to be a very small bag of white powder.

“You guys want a bump?” she asked, looking over her shoulder to make sure no one was watching her.

“Fuck, Mia!” Penelope hissed as Mia sniffed some of the powder she had scooped with her fingernail.

“Relax Penny, it’s just a little coke. Remove the broomstick from your arse and have some fun” Mia giggled, grabbing Tonks’s hand and shoving the tiny bag back into her bra. “Let’s dance.”

Tonks looked back at Penelope, whose mouth was pressed into a tight line. Tonks gave her pleading eyes for her to join them, looking concerned. Penelope huffed as she grabbed her drink and joined them on the dance floor.

 

The girls danced to the loud, bass pounding music for a while, Tonks and Penelope easing up and beginning to have fun. Mia looked to be having the time of her life, but inside she was dumb. Her body was on autopilot, trying to feel something by pretending she did. She felt slight comfort in dancing close to her two best girlfriends, their sweaty bodies rubbing against each other as many of the men at the bar watched them. They were the centerpiece of the dance floor, only leaving their posts to return to the bar and get fresh drinks. 

“Ladies, ladies- we want some refills?” Joe said cheerily as the three of them approached the bar.

“Shots, Joe” Mia winked “and yes, refills”

“Just a refill for me, no shot” Penelope spoke up, earning her an eye roll from Mia.

“No shot; Just water!” Tonks added.

Mia turned back to Joe and rolled her eyes. “Light weights”

Joe handed them their glasses and one shot, which Mia downed in one gulp. She pulled some cash from her bra and slid it over the counter to Joe before making their way back to their table.

“You guys having fun? Isn’t this place amazing?” Mia asked, swaying slightly in her chair.

“You feel ok?” Tonks asked, ignoring her question.

“Oh yeah, just got a good buzz going. You guys need to catch up, you look far too sober” Mia giggled, taking the small bag out of her bra and sniffing a nail full of powder. Tonks and Penelope shifted uncomfortably in their chairs, watching Mia stow the almost empty bag back in her bra. Mia’s attention shifted to a group of guys a few tables away from them playing billiards, and wide grin spreading across her face.

“Senior airman douchebag….” She said under her breath, watching the group intently.

“What?” Penelope asked, looking puzzled.

“That group over there, they’re airmen. They’re stationed at Lakenheath with my dad. The blonde one, Eric, has the hots for me.” Mia said, sipping her drink.

Mia watched Eric as he took a shot, laughing with his buddies on presumably a free Friday night. His tan skin, bright blonde hair and strong jawline for some reason looked much more appealing to Mia tonight than normal. He had always been handsome, but tonight his looks seemed amplified.

“Come on, let’s go say hi” she said, grabbing Tonks’s hand, who grabbed Penelope’s.

Mia led the girls over the table of guys, who all straightened up when they saw three pretty girls headed their way.

“Eric Richardson” Mia said, enunciating his name slowly and grinning.

“Mia Roswell” he said, smirking with surprise “didn’t expect to see you here at this old joint”

Eric turned to his group of guys, who were eyeing the trio with curiosity. 

“Guys, this is Lt. Colonel Roswell’s daughter” Eric said casually.

“No shit, this is her??” a very tall, buff airman with hair as dark as Mia’s, said to Eric.

Mia’s eyes narrowed, her nose crinkled as she gave Eric a wry smile.

“Have you told them about me?” She asked, leaning towards him.

“Maybe” He grinned, “where’s that old guy you usually hang around?”

Mia stiffened, he was talking about Remus. He had never even seemed to pay any mind to Remus when they were visiting John on base.

“He’s not around anymore.” Mia said quickly. “These are my friends, Tonks and Penelope.”

“Tonks?” a shorter, red haired airman asked.

“It’s my surname” Tonks rolled her eyes.

Eric grinned. “That’s Pat” he said, pointing to the shorter red haired man. “This tall beefcake is Kyle” he pointed to the dark haired buff man. “And this is Jason” pointing to another dark haired airman that was the same height as the one called Pat. 

“You boys want to play some billiards?” Mia asked, taking the billiards stick from the one called Jason.

Mia walked over to where Kyle was standing and began repositioning the billiard balls to start a new game. Penelope and Tonks exchanged unsure looks about Mia barging in on their game.

“Yeah, let’s play” Kyle said, looking down at Mia and then to the other girls with an eager grin.

“I love british chicks” Jason whispered in Eric’s ear.

 

They played a few games of billiards with the airmen before Mia and Eric made their way onto the dance floor. Eric was extra ‘helpful’ with Mia during their games, using the excuse of showing her how to get a better shot to wrap his arms around her. She had been enticing him, leaning over father than necessary when taking her turn, sticking her bum outward and arching her back. He had watched her hungrily, undressing her with his eyes much to the girls’ dissatisfaction.

Tonks and Penelope sat back and watched hopelessly as Mia clung onto Eric, grinding her body against his to the beat of the music. The other airmen had stepped outside to smoke cigarettes, which the girls were glad for so they could get a few minutes alone. 

“I hate how reckless she’s been since Remus left.” Tonks said, running her finger along the rim of her glass.

“I know. She’s impossible to talk to. She doesn’t see what she’s doing” Penelope said, her face twisting when she saw Mia start to snog Eric.

“Well, I guess that means she’s over Remus” Tonks muttered, scrunching her nose.

“No, I think she’s not; that’s why she’s acting like this.” Penelope said darkly.

The girls watched as Eric whispered something in Mia’s ear, to which a wide grin spread across her face. She trotted back over to the girls, and Eric made his way over to the men’s restroom. Mia propped her left leg up on a chair, and pulled her wand from under her dress, handing it to Penelope.

“Where the hell was that?” Tonks said, looking at her bewildered that her wand was concealed the entire time.

“Garter holster” Mia winked. “Hold this for me, Penny”

“Mia…” Penelope tried to start, but Mia skipped off before she could get anymore words out.

Tonks and Penelope watched helplessly as they saw Mia enter the men’s restroom that Eric had just went into a moment earlier.

“Kingsley and Bill are positioned around the corner. One thing we don’t like and I’ll signal them” Tonks said, staring at the restroom door.

“You brought back-up??” Penelope snorted into her glass. “And I’ve seen about 10 things I don’t like”

The girls chuckled, Tonks face falling back into a serious expression.

“They insisted, we are all concerned about Mia, and in these times it doesn’t hurt to be careful.” Tonks said grimly. “We don’t want to take any chances”

* * *

The restroom had an almost green twinge from the fluorescent lighting that was flickering from a loose bulb. Eric flipped the lock on the bathroom door and pushed Mia against it, running his hands along her body. 

“God you’re so hot” he said, his lips then crashing against hers.

They snogged against the door for a minute before Eric picked her up and moved her to the bathroom counter. Mia felt like she was on autopilot, her mind numb but hoping that doing this with Eric would make her feel something; anything. His hands slid up along the garter holster that her wand was once in. he opened his mouth to ask what it was, but she kissed him to shut him up, undoing his belt furiously. He yanked her underwear off and forced her dress up. He slipped inside and began pounding in and out of her on the bathroom counter.

“Fuck, you’re amazing Mia…” he growled in her ear as he pounded in and out of her.

It was all wrong. His touch was wrong, his voice was wrong, his kisses were wrong. Mia felt nothing; no passion, no joy, no thrill. He wasn’t the man she loved. He didn’t kiss her like Remus, didn’t touch her like Remus, and didn’t love her like Remus.

“I’ll meet you back out there?” Eric said, fixing his pants when they were finished.

“Yeah” Mia mumbled, and watched him unlock the bathroom door and exit.

Mia turned and looked at herself in the mirror; her eyes were bloodshot, her hair disheveled, and her cheekbones sunk in. _What are you doing to yourself?_ She thought as she stared at her reflection, the effects of night after night alcohol and cocaine use seemingly obvious to her in the greenish fluorescent lighting. Shame washed over her, so intensely she began to shake. _Sirius would be ashamed of you. Remus would be ashamed of you._ She brought her right hand to cover her mouth and nose to muffle a sob that was threatening to escape, her smooth gold bracelet pressing into her cheek. She took a deep breath and removed her hand, looking at the band she couldn’t bear to remove. Her left hand moved up to the small garnet pendant that hung around her neck. Even after all the turbulence that she and Remus had gone though, she still wore the things he gave her, because even if she tried to pretend otherwise, she loved him.

She looked at herself disgusted; these weren’t the feelings she was trying to feel. She was trying to feel happy, feel whole, and feel alive. Instead she felt shame, guilt and frustration. Remus had been one to make her feel whole, so why did she allow herself to push him away? The surge of emotion was too much; her feelings too intense. Mia grabbed the little bag of powder she had tucked away in her bra and sniffed the rest of it. She exited the restroom adjusting the skirt of her dress, the burning between her legs from where Eric was just a few moments before almost uncomfortable. She swayed in her heels slightly as she made her way back to where Tonks, Penelope, Eric and the other airmen were seated.

“I need a drink” she said sharply.

“Coming right up, babe” Eric smiled “ladies, anything for you?” 

“Just water” Tonks said with a weary smile.

“No thanks” Penelope said.

“2 shots of tequila chilled, Eric, and a gin fizz” Mia demanded, sitting down next to Penelope heavily.

Eric winked and sauntered off to the bar. The airmen were playing more billiards behind them, getting as competitive as the Hogwarts Gobstones club used to.

“Mia, maybe you shouldn’t…” Penelope said gently.

“Piss off Penelope. If you’re going to be lame, then go home” Mia growled, running her hand through her hair.

Tonks and Penelope exchanged looks, but remained silent. Eric came back with Mia’s plethora of drinks, Tonks’s water and a beer for himself. Mia downed her 2 shots back to back, chasing it with her gin fizz. Eric chuckled at her, grinning ear to ear.

“This chick could drink me under the table” he said to Penelope and Tonks, who looked rather dissatisfied.

“Damn straight” Mia said, standing up and stumbling slightly. “Let’s dance” 

She held her hand out to Eric who escorted her back to the dance floor. 

“Tonks… how long are we going to let this go on?” Penelope said nervously.

“I don’t know” Tonks said slowly, eyeing Mia and Eric intently. 

Tonks was repulsed watching Mia grind her body against Eric’s; she knew how heartbroken Remus would be if he could see her just now. 

Mia felt as if she was having an out of body experience. The bass of the music reverberated in her chest as she danced, the colored lights flashing made it seem like they were a series of still pictures flashing in sequence. The feeling of Eric’s hands on her hips as she grinded against him was not comforting nor was it uncomfortable. Eric’s body pressing against hers just felt like a cheap imitation, like off-brand shampoo or dollar outlet dish soap. He was shorter than Remus, his body more ridged and stiff. His cologne was different; it wasn’t as alluring as the one she was used to. Mia closed her eyes and danced faster, hoping that the more she grinded against Eric the more he would start to feel like Remus. Eric’s hands slid down her hips, his cheek pressing against the side of her head as he whispered in her ear.

“You are so sexy…” he purred.

_Sexy_. She thought, as the word did nothing for her in that moment. _Remus would tell me I’m beautiful_. Mia felt a slight tension in her chest. She longed to hear the word beautiful. Would it sound right coming from Eric? She imagined Remus whispering it to her, the word rolling off his tongue with velvet smoothness. She imagined him placing small kisses on her neck for every time he said it. “ _beautiful_ ” as he kissed her jaw. “ _beautiful_ ” as he kissed her throat. “ _beautiful_ ” as he kissed her collarbone.

Her chest tightened more with the longing feelings to be with him, making her painfully aware of Eric’s foreign feeling body against hers. She danced harder, willing herself to have fun, to feel joy in what she was doing now rather than reminisce on what she gave up. She felt herself grow more intoxicated by the minute from the cocaine and alcohol coursing through her, her mind slipping into a fog. 

She stumbled and fell on the dance floor, smacking her head against the hard floor. Tonks and Penelope jumped up and ran to her, Eric now propping her up.

“Mia, you alright??” Tonks called, lifting her head up to look into her eyes.

“mmmm I like this song….” Mia slurred, her eyes open to just slits.

“I think she hit her head” Eric said, concerned but obviously drunk himself.

“Ok, she’s done for tonight” Tonks said, pulling a small red pager from her pocket and hitting a couple buttons. 

Penelope looked at her confused, but understood when Bill and Kingsley came barging in the front door. A cold gust winded past them as the chilly air from the open door breezed in

“She alright?” Bill asked, his eyes widening when he saw Mia lying on the ground.

“It’s Billy!!!!” Mia cried in a high pitched drunken cackle. “Hi Billy…”

“Who the hell are these guys?” Eric said to the girls, looking at Kingsley and Bill suspicious.

“Her friends— who the hell are you?” Kingsley said forcefully, his deep voice unexpected, making Eric jump slightly. “Dora, what did she drink?”

“What didn’t she drink?” Tonks said cynically.

Kingsley picked Mia up off the floor, her arms wrapping around his neck as she leaned her head against him.

“Kingsssy I’m so tired…” she slurred in his ear.

“Let’s go!” Kingsley snapped at the group. 

Bill, Tonks, and Penelope followed Kingsley and Mia out of the bar, leaving Eric on the dance floor, staring at them vacantly.

* * *

Arriving back at the flat, Penelope was met with a shock to discover Fleur Delacour to be standing in their kitchen, preparing what looked like a full dinner of pasta and garlic bread. Kingsley carried Mia into her bedroom as Bill kissed Fleur hello.

“I am zo ‘lad you all ar’ back!” she said in a throaty voice, giving everyone a pleasant smile.

“uhm, why are you cooking in my house….?” Penelope asked, trying not to sound rude despite Fleur’s obvious intrusion.

“Fleur wanted to be helpful, so I asked her to wait here for us” Bill said, wrapping his arm around her waist and smiling at her dotingly.

“Gotcha, so she’s cooking in my kitchen” she muttered to Tonks under her breath, who snorted a laugh.

Kingsley emerged from the bedroom, wiping sweat from his brow.

“I think she’s going to be ok, just needs to sleep it off.” He said, now looking puzzled at Fleur’s meal she had laid out. “Are we eating…?”

“I guess so” Penelope shrugged, grabbing plates out of the cabinet for everyone.

 

It was nearly sunrise before any of them had gotten to bed. Bill and Fleur took Penelope’s bedroom, while Penelope and Tonks piled in bed next to a snoring Mia, leaving Kingsley on the couch. They slept until the sun was shining brightly outside, Kingsley the first one up and starting coffee for everyone. Tonks and Penelope came sniffing for a cup of coffee, startled to hear a giggling coming from the other bedroom.

“I swear if Bill is fucking her in my bed…” Penelope growled, pouring herself a cup of coffee. “They might be engaged now but still…”

Tonks kissed Kingsley as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug.

“I missed you last night…” She purred.

“Not here, Dora…” he grumbled, smirking and kissing her.

They exchanged a few more kisses until Penelope started making gagging noises. Kingsley coughed awkwardly, shifting in his chair. The phone rang, making Tonks jump at the unfamiliar sound.

“I hate those muggle contraptions” she rolled her eyes as Penelope answered.

“No, she’s not awake yet.” Penelope said, irritation plastered all over her face. “NO! No, I don’t think that’s necessary.”

Kingsley and Tonks exchanged confused glances.

“I can let her know you called when she wakes.” Penelope muttered into the phone, taking a sip of her coffee. “Yeah, ok, bye.”

Penelope hung up the phone and rolled her eyes, leaning against the counter next to the phone.

“Who was that?” Tonks asked

“That airmen bloke from the bar last night, Eric; wanted to see how Mia was this morning.”

“Good question; how is she this morning?” Kingsley asked.

His question was answered when Mia walked out of her room, still wearing her black dress from the night before. Her hair was knotted and disheveled, and her eye makeup was smeared all over her face. She was squinting at the lights coming from the kitchen.

“I feel like shit if anyone was wondering” she said flatly, taking a seat at the dining room table.

Kingsley handed her a cup of coffee and sat down across from her.

“Did you get here this morning?” she asked Kingsley, blinking at him a few times before sipping her coffee.

He looked at her and frowned. “Do you not remember Bill and I at the bar last night?” he asked, sounding concerned.

“No, the last thing I remember was dancing with Eric” she said, trying to recall the hazy events of the night before.

“Was that before or after you fucked him in the bathroom?” Penelope interjected snottily.

Mia paused for a moment, taking another sip of her coffee. “…after” she said quietly, mortified.

“Mia, we’re worried about you” Tonks began, but was interrupted by Bill and Fleur coming out of Penelope’s room.

“’ood morning e’ryone!” Fleur said cheerily, a little too loud.

Mia groaned and buried her head in her arms.

“Hey Mia, how are you feeling?” Bill asked politely.

“My head is pounding!” she cried, her voice muffled.

“Where is zee orange juice?” Fleur hollered from the fridge.

“Fleur, can you speak quieter?” Penelope asked, fighting a sneer

Fleur threw her hand over her mouth and giggled. Mia and Penelope both rolled their eyes.

“Anyway, Mia, you really scared us last night. This isn’t like you” Tonks said, getting looks of reprieve from Penelope.

“I’m fine” she said flatly.

“You are now, but what if next time you’re not? You’ve been very reckless” Kingsley said calmly

“You’re not my mother” Mia sneered at him.

Kingsley looked at her, his expression hardening “Maybe not, but it’s not ok for you to scare us like this. Dora said you’ve been doing cocaine; that’s not like you, Mia.”

Mia shifted uncomfortably in her seat, eyeing Kingsley cautiously. He wasn’t usually one to talk with her on this personal level, even after he and Tonks started dating and Mia had been spending more time with him.

“Maybe this is the new me” she mumbled, sipping her coffee once more.

“No, this is the ‘you’ that you are using as a shield.” Kingsley said matter of fact.

“We know you miss Sirius, Mia, but lean on us to help you get through it. Not alcohol or drugs” Bill said softly.

“Or airman’s dicks” Tonks said, winking at Mia.

Bill and Mia laughed while Kingsley’s face twisted in embarrassment.

“He called this morning, by the way” Tonks added.

“Fuck” Mia breathed, pressing her forehead into the heels of her hands. “He’s going to think I’m in to him like that now”

“Yep, probably” Penelope said flatly, not letting her forget she disapproved of the events of the previous night. “He wanted to come over here to check on you. You just _had_ to pick the one that was already pining for you.”

“Why are you being a bitch?” Mia snapped

“Why are you being a c—“Penelope began, but Bill interjected.

“OK, ok, let’s not go there right now!”

A silence fell amongst them as Mia and Penelope exchanged glances. She knew she had gone too far the night before; consequences for her actions were starting to catch up with her. She could call Penelope a bitch all she wanted, but she knew deep down she deserved the attitude she was getting.

“Was the airman at least decent??” Tonks asked slyly, breaking the tension.

“Well, he certainly wasn’t Remus…” Mia gave her a small smile.

“Stop talking stop talking stop talking” Kingsley said, covering his ears. “I don’t need to hear that”

The group laughed, Tonks grinning furiously and kissing Kingsley on the cheek.

“In all seriousness though, Mia, we really are worried.” Bill said.

“I guess I’ve maybe been an asshole...” Mia said, picking at her fingernails

“Yes, you have” Penelope snorted into her cup.

Mia didn’t even glare or roll her eyes, because she knew Penelope was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> grief does terrible things to good people. 
> 
> bookmark this fic to stay updated when the new chapters drop, and as always, Kudos and comments are much appreciated!


	34. chapter 34

“Do you want some eggs? I’m making some for breakfast” Mia asked Penelope, who was sitting at the table nose deep in a copy of Witch Weekly.

“I didn’t know you were eating breakfast these days” she said flatly, not looking up from her magazine.

Mia sighed; it had been a week since their fiasco at Top Hats, and their friendship seemed to be skating on thin ice.

“Today I am” she replied, trying to stifle an eye roll. “So you want some or not?”

“Sure” Penelope shrugged

They sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes as they ate, the only sound in the flat was their chewing and scraping of forks on their plate. 

“So, Kingsley said if I wanted, he might be able to get me an internship at the Ministry. Maybe get my foot in the door so my Auror application next year would stand out.”

Kingsley had been really attentive to her over the last week in regards to her professional future. He had insisted she needed to experience some work in the Ministry to re-spark some passion for her aspiring career. She partly knew he was hoping to be able to make her stay busy enough to keep her out of the bars she had begun to circuit daily.

“Are you actually going to apply next year?”

Mia gritted her teeth “I’m planning on it”

“Great, sounds like a good opportunity”

The tension between them was thick. Penelope’s voice was stale and stiff, not offering much more to the conversation than direct responses. Mia got up and dumped half her plate of eggs in the sink before retreating off to her room, Penelope only looking up from her magazine when Mia already was out of the room.

* * *

Mia dug through her drawers as she looked for her Chudley Cannons qudditch t- shirt, unable to find it in the disorganized mess of her dresser. She flung shirts irritably over her shoulder, betting with herself the shirt she was looking for would be at the bottom of the last drawer she’d look in. Her wet hair stuck to the side of her face, fresh out of the shower that she spent nearly an hour in to hopefully avoid Penelope until she left for work. As her hand was groping around the bottom of one of the drawers, she felt her fingertips hit something hard, she pulling it out curiously. Her heart leapt when she pulled out a framed photo of her and Remus by the lake at his cottage, his arm wrapping around her over and over as the pictured replayed the memory. She set it on the dresser and stared at it intently, looking at how happy she was as the photo was taken. Tears began to sting her eyes as she felt the smooth, gold band on her wrist, wondering if Remus was wearing his. What was her reasoning for pushing him away? What on earth did he do to make her feel as irritable and frustrated with him? _Nothing_ she realized, _you let him go for absolutely no good reason._

She ran a hand through her damp hair and dug more for her Cannons shirt, finding it at the bottom of the next drawer she looked in. She pulled it over her head and slipped on a pair of sweatpants, staring at the photo as she dressed. _You’re an idiot_ she thought as a few tears fell, her mind replaying the night she stormed out on him. She knew in her heart she loved him, and she missed him. She wished she could go back in time and change that night, run back into his arms and cry and apologize for how terrible she had been. She longed for him to be here with her right now, to hold her and whisper how much he loved her in her ear. _If he even still does_ she thought. _You’ve been terrible to everyone; you don’t deserve anyone’s love._

She shot her arm underneath her bed and felt around to find a small bottle of rum. She took a few hearty swigs, feeling a rush of shame that she was turning to alcohol to numb her feelings after her friend’s intervention last week. She felt like she alienated everyone with her chip on her shoulder, she didn’t deserve these wonderful people who claimed to love her. She curled herself into a ball and began to sob, feeling hopeless and alone, covering her mouth in hopes that Penelope wouldn’t hear her.

“You always have been a loud crier” Penelope’s voice called from the doorway.

“I’m not crying” Mia said, wiping her tears quickly

“mhmm…” She hummed as she plopped down next to her, moving the small bottle of rum away from her. 

“Do you know why I’ve been upset with you?” She asked

“Because I’m an asshole” Mia said flatly

“You’re not an asshole, your just being one” Penelope said with a chuckle “I am upset with you because I know your hurting, but you’re also hurting yourself. You are self-destructing”

“I know” Mia whispered softly.

“Can I say something without you slitting my throat?”

“Sure”

“You need to get over the thought that you were the only one to love Sirius and be upset over his death. I watched Remus drink nearly a whole bottle of scotch every night because not only was he worried about you, he lost his best friend also. I sat up with him a couple nights, he was really torn up but insisted he keep a brave face for you” Mia’s chin started quivering as she began to pick her fingernails.

“I love him, Penny, and I was an idiot to leave him. I can’t believe I am so stupid!” She banged her fists against her head in frustration. “I hate myself. Sirius would be ashamed of me. I am ashamed of me”

“We all make mistakes” Penelope said, wrapping her arm around Mia. “That’s how we learn”

“He probably hates me” she sniffled, looking back up at the picture of the two of them, her heart fluttering as she watched him wrap his arm around her over and over.

“I don’t think he could ever hate you” Penelope said with a half-smile.

“Do you hate me?”

“No, you daft bimbo, but I hate what you are doing to all of us and yourself” she chortled “You want to have a girls night tonight? I’m off work at 6; we could invite Tonks too and go shopping in Diagon Alley?”

“I’m supposed to spend the evening with my dad” Mia said, wiping her tears on the hem of her shirt. “Maybe next weekend? Make a whole day of it?”

“It’s a date” Penelope said with a small smile.

Penelope took Mia’s hand and squeezed it gently.

“I love you, you know. That’s why you make me so mad”

Mia sniffled and leaned her head against Penelope’s shoulder. “I love you too, Penny.”

* * *

Remus’s time underground with the werewolf pack had proven to be much more difficult than he was expecting. Many of the werewolves were suspicious of him, he showed too many signs of having lived with wizards, rather than denouncing the ways of the wizarding world and living off stolen meat and hunting humans during full moons. He was certain his toothbrush gave him away as being ‘too’ civilized, receiving many side eye glances as he brushed before bed and when he woke. He had snuck his wolfsbane potion the couple full moons he spent with the pack, but was too nervous to give any out at this stage in his mission. Many of the werewolves that he did get to speak to seemed too afraid of Fenrir Greyback, the most savage werewolf in Britain, to change sides. Things didn’t look like they were going well for the Order from what he was able to read in the few Daily Prophet issues he was able to obtain. The Death Eaters that were placed in Azkaban following the Battle of the Department of Mysteries were found missing from their cells again, noted as another mass breakout, and the strange murders and disappearances were ramping up tenfold.

Remus was sitting off a few paces away from the center of the pack with his bag of potions and toiletries, running his index finger over the smooth gold bracelet that was fastened snug on his wrist. He could’ve sworn the bracelet had twitched, not exactly vibrated like it was supposed to if Mia was in danger, but he felt something. He didn’t even know if she were still wearing hers; would she have removed it and thrown it out when she left him? 

He willed himself to forget about her, the usual feelings of self-loathing trying to tell him it was due to his condition that he knew she’d never be able to stay with a werewolf. Deep down he knew it had nothing to do with him being a werewolf, but it was easier to blame his ‘furry little problem’, as James had nicknamed is so many years ago. His mind kept returning to the night she left, the feeling of his heart hitting the floor when he told her not to leave, and she walked out the door anyway, not even looking back. Why didn’t he follow her? Run her down and force her to admit she loved him and was just hurting over Sirius? He wished he had some scotch with him at this moment, he wanted nothing more than to chug the whole bottle and forget that night. 

“Remus Lupin, wasn’t it?”

His thoughts were interrupted by a familiar face walking over to him, sitting down between him and his bag. It was the werewolf from the bite ward at St. Mungos, whose bed was next to Arthur’s the previous year. 

“I’m sorry; I didn’t catch your name when we met last year…?” Remus said politely.

The werewolf chuckled “That’s ‘cause I didn’t give it. Where’s that pretty girl of yours?”

“She’s not around anymore” Remus muttered, fidgeting with his sleeve to cover the golden band around his wrist.

“Oh, you didn’t maul during the cycle, did you??” the werewolf asked, cringing slightly.

Remus let out a bark of laughter “No, no nothing like that. We broke up a few months ago.”

“She seemed perfectly fine with shagging a werewolf when she talked to me…?”

“We lost a… friend, at the beginning of this summer. She hasn’t been the same since.” 

“Grief does terrible things to people. I know this from experience.” The werewolf said, leaving back against the cave wall. “I was real tore up after I was bitten, but once I joined this pack I felt a sense of community. I was going to be able to live with this, and be alright.”

“I’m glad you came to terms with yourself” Remus smiled weakly.

“That little girlfriend of yours helped me, actually.” The werewolf chuckled, pulling out a colorful figurine from the pocket of his robes. 

Remus’s eyes fixed on the figurine in the man’s hand. He remembered Mia purchasing the small glass wolf, so excited to give it to the man who never had a single visitor in the hospital.

“She’s a sweet girl; pain in the ass I’m sure, but sweet.”

Remus and the werewolf both laughed, a comfortable pause following while Remus remembered all the times Mia had been a handful. He smiled thinking of her, yes she was a pain in the ass, but she was his pain in the ass. Had been his, he realized, his face falling again.

“You know you’re not going to get these wolves to change their mind.” The werewolf said, breaking their silence.

Remus looked at him quickly. He hadn’t known this man was part of the pack, so he hadn’t talked to him about joining sides with the Order of the Phoenix. There was hundreds that lived in this cave; He had maybe only gotten a chance to chat with 40 or 50 werewolves so far.

“There are rumors going around the pack.” The werewolf explained. “ _’the one who brushes his teeth is a spy'_ they’ve been saying. I’d rather fight on your side, but I’d also rather not cross Fenrir Greyback"

“Most of them are afraid to cross him” Remus muttered.

“You should be too, he’ll rip you to shreds” the werewolf chuckled sardonically.

“Greyback was the one who turned me, as a child. He already ripped me to shreds, Sort of.” Remus said darkly.

“No shit” the werewolf breathed “damn, I’m surprised you survived that, he loves biting ‘em young, gets carried away sometimes.”

The pause between them now was awkward, the thought of Fenrir Greyback snacking on the flesh of young children made Remus’s stomach churn.

“Listen, Remus. You should get out of here. Greyback sometimes visits this pack and it wouldn’t be wise for you to be here.” 

The werewolf pulled out a piece of parchment from his pocket that was yellowed from outdoor exposure.

“You got a quill in here?” he said, looking into Remus’s bag and seeing the stash of wolfsbane potions. “Holy shit, is this wolfsbane?

Remus nodded. “I was going to share.”

“These wolves won’t want this, but could I have some??” the man said eagerly.

Remus plucked out a few vials of wolfsbane and handed them to the man.

“Here, take these.” he said with a small smile. “Quill is in the side zipper pocket of the bag”

The werewolf grinned at him, getting the quill and ink out, scrawling a few words on the yellowed parchment.

“It’s not every day a woman accepts who we are. When you find one that does, you fight for that. Go home, Remus. Fight for her.”

The man wrapped the bit of parchment around the figurine and handed it to Remus.

“Give this to her. Mia. And tell her thank you.” The werewolf said warmly, picking up Remus’s bag and standing up. “Now go get your girl”

Remus smiled, looking at the man as he walked away from him. He hastily shoved the figurine in his bag, and stood up. He looked back at the werewolf who didn’t share his name, who looked over his shoulder and nodded to him.

* * *

Remus arrived back at headquarters around dinnertime to find the kitchen table full of members of the Order, everyone enjoying a delicious smelling roast that Molly had prepared. He was greeted with many smiles as he walked into the kitchen, scanning the table for Mia, but she was nowhere to be found.

“Remus! Oh it’s so good to see you!” Molly cried, throwing her arms around his torso. “Sit, eat, you look peaky.”

Molly shoved Remus down into a chair, and fixed him a plate of roast, mashed potatoes green beans. He began shoveling hungrily, the food tasting like pure heaven compared to the dried out hunted game he ate with the pack.

“How did it go underground?” Arthur asked, chuckling at Remus savagely devouring his plate.

“Not well” he said between bites. “Most of them are too afraid of Greyback to change sides.”

“Damn. Well, can’t blame them I guess.” Bill said as Fleur was wiping a bit of gravy off his cheek. “Thanks sweetie…”

Molly and Susan crinkled their nose at them as they rubbed their noses together, their public display of affection slightly nauseating.

Susan looked at Remus with a weak smile. “It’s good to have you back, Remus.”

He about choked on his roast as Susan said this, unsure if he heard her correctly. He looked up at her quickly; she didn’t return a cold glare that she typically gave him over the last year, but looked at him almost like they were friends again.

“Thanks Susan, I’m glad to be back” he said warmly, giving her a friendly smile. He decided to push his luck further with her. “How is Mia?”

Just as the words came out of his mouth, his right wrist began to vibrate.


	35. chapter 35

“I want you in my office in 10 minutes! And I need that list completed by the morning, without any bullshit from you or your team” 

Mia was sitting in her father’s office fidgeting with his Brutus Buckeye bobble head while he was on a call, trying not to laugh at the poor soul who was getting his ass handed to him on the phone.

“Make it happen Richardson, or you can explain to the General why your team can’t do fuck all. 10 minutes, don’t keep me waiting!”

John slammed the phone onto the receiver, shaking off his frustration

“Sorry kiddo” he said apologetically.

“Its fine” Mia laughed. “Do you enjoy ripping ass? If so, you’re quite good at it”

John laughed, his hazel eyes twinkling.

“Sometimes; Eric can’t seem to get his team to listen to him, seeing as how he goes out drinking with them every weekend. They don’t respect him as their superior.”

Mia shifted uncomfortably as the sound of Eric’s name. John didn’t know the places she let Eric touch her that one night in the bathroom at Top Hats, and was certain he’d kill him if he ever found out about that. She started contemplating where to hide so she wouldn’t run into him; she hadn’t seen Eric since that night, and had avoided most of his phone calls.

“Anyway, what do you want to eat for dinner? I’ve just got to rip him a new asshole face to face then I’m all yours for the evening. We could get a pizza and a pitcher of beer, or we could try that new sushi restaurant around the corner.”

“I’m not really hungry, dad.”

John sighed heavily “Sweetie, we’ve been over this—“He began, but a soft crack from outside the office interrupted them.

“What was that?” he asked, his brow furrowing.

Mia’s right wrist began to vibrate, making her look around wildly, her heart starting to pound in her ears.

* * *

Remus jumped up from the table, everyone’s plates clanking as he bumped the table. He was clutching his wrist, eyes wide with fear. 

“Remus, what’s wrong?” Molly asked, her face twisting with concern.

“Where is she today?” he asked, panic flooding though him as the bracelet continued to vibrate.

“Who, Mia?” Tonks asked vacantly.

“Yes! Where is she?”

“She’s on base, with her father….” Susan said slowly, her eyebrows knitting together.

A silver doe came shooting into the room through a wall, delivering a message in Snape’s voice, stating that Dolohov and a team of Death Eaters were going after John Roswell.

“I’ll go first; Susan, can you get everyone else there?” Remus said quickly, stepping away from his seat.

Susan opened her mouth to speak, but before she could, Remus disapparated. Fear coursed through her; fearing this very thing from the moment he told her he was being stationed in the UK. She shook off her emotions; this was no time to panic. She needed to get it together, formulate a plan fast and save her ex-husband.

“Ok everyone, listen up.”

* * *

Mia was looking around wildly for the source of the noise when Remus came bustling in to the office, robes very worn and tattered. The sight of him took her breath away; she didn’t know he was back, let alone didn’t expect him to appear here.

“Remus??” John looked at him with a severely puzzled expression, eyeing the state of his clothing intently.

“Mia, John, we need to go, now”

“You can’t just apparate onto a military base, are you insane???” she hissed, looking over his shoulder, expecting armed MPs to come running in to arrest him.

“Apparate, what are you talking about??” John said to Mia, his eyes darting back and forth between them.

“Never mind that!” Remus said forcefully. “Mia, Dolohov is coming for him, with a team of Death Eaters. We need to go, now!”

He pulled up his right sleeve to show his thin, gold bracelet vibrating on his wrist, a low hum just barely audible. She looked down at her own bracelet, remembering that it started vibrating the moment after she heard the sound of apparition.

“Shit” Mia said under her breath “Dad come on, we have to go”

Any awkward tension that should be present between the two of them wasn’t there in the prospects of a Death Eater ambush. John didn’t move, his eyes still darting back and forth between the two of them.

“We're not going anywhere until one of you explains what’s going on, and how you got on base without a visitors pass. And what is a ‘Death Eater’?” John asked sternly.

“Dad, listen to me, we don’t have time.” Mia said quickly, a hint of panic in her voice “Remus is a wizard; I am a witch, so is mum. You used to know this, but you… suffered an injury and can’t remember, and we chose not to tell you, because there are bad wizards that want to hurt you. Those bad wizards are coming, and we need to go.” 

“Wizards? What the hell kind of joke is this?” John asked incredulously.

“DAD! Just go with it, I’ll explain later!”

Just as Mia said this, flashes of light could be seen from out in the hallway, and there was a lot of commotion stirring. 

“Wand at the ready, Mia, they’re here”

Mia pulled her wand out as she and Remus started for the door. John followed them out, hollering for Mia to explain herself. As she stepped out in the hallway, she saw a flash of purple headed her way and threw up a protego charm to block it. She found herself in a duel with one older, gray haired death eater, as Remus began dueling with another shorter, stockier man. 

John was awestruck at what was happening before him, and when he saw a pale woman with wild curly hair come to join the other two men, he pulled out his gun that was holstered to his hip and yelled 

“Stop— don’t come any closer!” 

The woman waved her wand and the gun flew out of John’s hand, her cackle of laughter echoing through the hall. Mia recognized her as Bellatrix Lestrange, Sirius’s cousin and murderer. Before they all knew it, more figures apparated in with a puff of dark smoke, out-numbering them 3:1. Mia didn’t so much as blink before someone grabbed her and forced her down on her knees, wand pointed at her throat. She looked around, seeing Remus and John in the same predicament she found herself. A group of Death Eaters stood before them, grinning maliciously. 

“Well, well, well, John Roswell, we meet again” said a voice in the back of the group. Antonin Dolohov stepped out and walked over to where John was kneeling. 

“It’s him” Mia whispered, not meaning to actually say it out loud. 

The wand that was being held at her throat pushed in slightly firmer.

“Meet again—no, who the hell are you?” John barked. 

“I’d heard you had a lapse in memory” Dolohov said, amused. “Who am I? Well… Let me give you a refresher— Crucio!” 

John shrieked in pain, his screams were echoing through the halls causing Mia to start shaking. Three MPs came running down the hall with large assault rifles, but one of the Death Eaters waved their wand and the men went flying, cracking their heads against the cinderblock walls of the hallway. They slumped on the floor, knocked unconscious from the blow. Another group of airmen came around the corner after them, but were stopped in their tracks by Bellatrix casting a binding charm, ropes flying from the tip of her wand and wrapping around the group of men. Mia’s stomach dropped when she saw one of the bound airmen was Eric, staring at her with a gaping mouth and bewildered expression. John’s screaming in agony was too much for her to hear, she felt the same horror as when she was four years old and hiding behind the couch in their living room. 

“STOP, PLEASE, STOP! DON’T HURT HIM!” she screamed, tears were flowing down her face.

John fell silent as Dolohov lifted his wand and gave her a horrible smile. 

“MIA!” Eric shouted, struggling in his binds

“Shut up you filthy muggle!” Bellatrix hissed, shooting another rope at him that gagged him, leaving him to make muffled grunting sounds in protest. “Anyone else feel chatty?”

Bellatrix cackled in pleasure at watching the other airmen shake their heads vigorously, terrified and quiet as mice. Dolohov stepped towards Mia, smirking as he circled her.

“Look how grown up you are, little Amelia” his voice was sickeningly sweet as he flicked a strand of her hair with his wand “This is a pleasant surprise; I wasn’t expecting to be able to kill two birds with one stone today”

“Let my father go, he did nothing to you!” She growled

“Oh, I know that, see, but your mother did” he replied with a menacing grin. “Do you remember the night I paid a little visit to your family all those years ago?”

Mia stayed silent, shooting daggers out of her eyes as she felt the wand at her throat push in more.

“I wanted information out of your mother, locations of safe houses, etc. The Dark Lord tasked me with hunting down the information he required. I arrived at your home, to find your mother was married and had mated with that filthy American muggle, and had you, a dirty half-blood brat, as a result.”

Dolohov looked at her with a putrid expression, making Mia feel angrier. She wasn’t sure if she could possibly hate him more than she already did.

“I bound her to a chair and let her watch as I tortured your dear old dad, him begging me for mercy, begging me for death, but she didn’t talk. I grew impatient; I was ready to kill him and move on to you. You were just a little girl with those stupid pigtails, crying behind the couch. I knew if I had gotten to you, I’d make her talk.”

Mia’s stomach flip flopped as she remembered that terrible night, so vivid still in her mind all these years later.

“But then that bitch got out of her binds, and drove me off. I didn’t see your mother again until after the Dark Lord went into hiding, and she arrested me for the Prewett brother’s deaths. I’ll never forget the smug look on her face; she was thrilled to be able to send me to Azkaban. I vowed then that filthy muggle lover would pay for my time spent in there.”

“Maybe if you didn’t want to go to Azkaban, you shouldn’t’ve killed people” She said flatly, her anger rising.

“My, don’t you have some nerve…” Dolohov’s eyes flashed at Mia, his smirk dangerous. “Daddy will pay for that one”

He turned back to John and cast the cruciatis curse again, the screams of agony returning. 

“No, don’t!” she cried. 

Dolohov lifted his wand, John falling quiet. He lay on the ground, no longer needing to be held down by a Death Eater, weak from the few bouts of the torture curse he had endured.

“The next time I see that bitch mother of yours, I’ll get to tell her how I killed her husband and her daughter”

“Eat shit!” Mia spat at him, struggling.

“I think it wise to mind your tongue” Dolohov said “Crucio!” 

This time, it was her that was hit. Her entire body felt like it had been set on fire, white hot heat coursed through her as she screamed in agony. Remus gritted his teeth and struggled to get free, but the wand pointing in at his neck pushed in tighter, reminding him he was virtually powerless in this moment.

Dolohov lifted his wand, chuckling softly. “I’ll tell you what, Mia; you can choose how your father dies. Shall I make it quick and painless? Or shall we take it slow, cut off limb after limb so he begs for it?”

“Suck my dick, Dolohov, you piece of shit!” she growled.

“I said watch your tongue, you little bitch!” he shouted, backhanding her across the face.

Her lip swelled as it stung from his slap. She felt a strange tingle in her palms as she watched her father struggling to stand.

“Leave her alone!” John shouted, but was knocked down by the cruciatis curse one more time.

Her father’s shrieking made Mia start sobbing again, begging and screaming at Dolohov to stop. He turned his head to her but didn’t lift his wand.

“You want me to stop his pain?” he yelled over John’s screaming. 

Mia nodded furiously, her eyes pleading with him to let her father go. Dolohov lifted his wand, allowing John to fall silent. His body was twitching from his nerve endings being on fire, his breathing rapid and shallow. Then, quicker than Mia realized, he said “avada kedavra” and a flash of green light flew from his wand, hitting John square in the chest. 

“DADDY!!!” she screamed, her sobs choking her and her tears streamed faster. 

Bellatrix laughed a loud, maniacal laugh “Nice!!” she cheered her fellow Death Eater for his kill. Remus squeezed his eyes shut, feeling sick from seeing John fall still as stone.

“You wanted me to stop his pain. I did as you wished” Dolohov said simply. 

Mia’s sobs quieted down to loud sniffles as she shot a look of hatred at him. Another man stepped out of the group of Death Eaters and approached her. He was huge; very muscular and taller than most of the group with long hair he gathered in a low pony tail, his body was hairier than the average man. His teeth looked like they had been filed into sharp points, and Mia didn’t like the flicker she saw in his eyes. 

“Well she’s a pretty little thing, isn’t she?” he said, cupping his very large, dirty hand on Mia’s tear soaked cheek. 

She flinched at his touch, his horrible grin making her skin crawl.

“What’cha think, Dolohov, maybe I’d be able to get in a bite or two?”

“Get away from her!” Remus yelled angrily, the wand at his throat pushing in deeper.

Bellatrix laughed again, taking pleasure in watching the situation in front of her unfold. 

“Oh, Remus, I barely noticed you over there. Good to see you, been too long.” 

Fenrir Greyback’s voice was smooth as silk as his evil smile shifted onto Remus. He was looking at Fenrir with the upmost disgust, his jaw clenched tightly. 

“Is she yours?” he asked casually.

“If you touch her, I’ll kill you!” Remus growled

“I’ll take that as a yes, then”

He leaned in close and sniffed her, letting out a sinister chuckle. Mia’s chin quivered as she squeezed her eyes shut, freezing up as her fight or flight senses kicked in.

“You didn’t mark her? Tsk Tsk, How irresponsible of you, Remus, you should’ve known better.”

His facial expression twisted with a terrible grin as he approached Remus, who was gritting his teeth and struggling to get free from the two Death Eaters holding him on his knees.

“Maybe I’ll take her for myself; mark and turn her at the full moon” Fenrir leaned in close to and whispered in Remus’s ear “Bet she feels real nice too, doesn’t she?

Remus’s eyes grew large with fear as Fenrir turned back to Mia, cracking his neck and knuckles.

“No, no, no NO!” Remus cried, his voice getting louder and more urgent as he saw Fenrir and Dolohov nod to each other. 

“On your feet, Princess, let’s go!”

As the Death Eaters forced Mia to her feet, the soft crack of apparition sounded behind them followed by jets of different color hexes flying around them. The tight grip on her arms released, and she jumped into action sending and deflecting spells all around them. She saw Dolohov advancing towards her, throwing up her protego charm just a moment too late, a knockback jinx throwing her backwards and making her hit the concrete wall with a hard smack. She dropped her wand, it rolling just outside of her reach. She looked up to see Dolohov standing over her, his face purple with rage.

“I’m going to break every single bone in your body as your bitch mother watches!” he hissed, grabbing her arm and jerking in a direction it wasn’t meant to move.

Mia screamed; she felt her arm snap and pain flood through her entire body. Her heartbeat was audible in her ears as the room swirled around her.

“By the time I’m done with you, you’re going to beg me to kill you!”

She looked up at his long, twisted face as jet of red light flew between them, turning his attention away.

“Dolohov, you son of a bitch!” Susan shouted, sending hexes at rapid speed toward him, burning with fury.

With Dolohov distracted, Mia grabbed her wand and scrambled to her feet, her arm surging with pain. 

“Expelliarmus!” a voice rasped just out of her line of sight.

She had just barely got her footing when her wand went flying out of her hand and she was ripped back down to the floor by a large hand grasping her ankle, her head smacking the wall behind her. 

“Let me give you something to remember me by” Fenrir said with a carnivorous smirk.

His nails were filed into sharp claws that pierced her skin through her jeans as he grabbed her hips and scratched down her thighs. She screamed as the scratches seared, the pain overtaking the throbbing in her arm. Her vision went spotty as she saw a jet of purple blast Fenrir off of her and out of her direct view. She felt a static tingle in her palms as she looked around, curious as to who shot the spell, how could he have been blown backwards when only the wall was behind them? She felt the room start to spin again, unsure if the pain in her arm, her hips or head was worse.

“We need to get out of here!” she heard a Death Eater holler from her left

She felt dizzy and nauseas as she shifted herself to sit up, watching mindlessly as the Death Eaters around them started disapparating in puffs of black smoke. She turned her head to look at the airmen bound in ropes, Eric staring at her panicked and wide eyed. She leaned back against the cinderblock wall as everything started to spin around her. Her arm and scratches pulsed in time with her heartbeat, her energy draining by the second. She felt so tired, like a heavy magnet was pulling her body through the floor. Remus came into view, running towards her, a cut on his right brow trickling blood down his face.

“Mia? Mia? You alright?” she heard him say, but it sounded muffled and far away, as if he was in another room speaking to her.

She blinked at him, unable to form words into a sentence. She heard a blood curdling scream, making her attention turn to her mother, dropping to her knees in front of the lifeless body of John. The scream was unlike any sound she had ever heard; it was almost inhuman. Her vision went black, and the last thing she remembered was her cheek hitting the cold, concrete floor as she slumped over onto her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter wasn't too graphic! 
> 
> Please leave me some love in the form of kudos and comments, I always appreciate them!


	36. chapter 36

“She’s been back there for hours; I have a right to see her! She’s my daughter!”

“Ma’am, I need you to calm down.”

“Don’t you tell me to calm down, you bi—“

Arthur seized Susan’s shoulder, “Susan, that isn’t helping” he said softly, “come on, sit down”

The Welcome Witch at St. Mungo’s undoubtedly hated her job; her bored, apathetic demeanor made Susan’s blood boil. The Order had been waiting in the lobby all night on their injured friends, watching other patients come and go. Fleur, Molly and Tonks hadn’t gone with the Order to fight, but arrived at St. Mungo’s to wait with the others on the injured members. Bill and Moody had experienced some spell damage during the fight and had been admitted, but they were already treated and taking visitors, while Mia remained in treatment.

Susan was a wreck; she spent the first part of the night sobbing into Kingsley’s shoulder over the death of her ex-husband, and the rest pacing up and down the waiting area, retreating into her mind and refusing to talk anymore about it. 

Remus had his head looked at and his cut healed before joining the rest of the Order in the waiting area, twirling his wand in his hand as he absent-mindedly stared at a tile square in front of him. He felt sick; had the rest of the Order not shown up when they had, would their night be much different? Would Fenrir and Dolohov take Mia to torture her elsewhere, leaving him to rot with guilt that he couldn’t save her? Would she have been turned, cursed to live with this terrible condition that he despised? Mia was all he had; he would never forgive himself if he couldn’t protect her.

It seemed like another hour before the Welcome Witch addressed the group, her apathetic personality unchanged from before.

“Are _all_ of you waiting on Amelia Roswell?” she said, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

“Yes, all of us” Susan said “Can we see her?”

“No” the Welcome Witch said flatly “But she is out of treatment and in recovery. It’ll be a bit before she can have visitors so if you all want to go home, we can send owls when she is ready.”

“For merlin’s sake” Susan grumbled under her breath. “Well, I’m going to wait here; she’s my daughter after all”

“Yes ma’am, you’ve said that.”

Susan gave the Welcome Witch a nasty glare before turning back to the Order, all of whom looked exhausted.

“Why don’t you all go get some sleep, it’s been a long night”

“Susie, are you sure you’re ok?” Kingsley asked, standing and wrapping an arm around a yawning Tonks.

“I’ll do better if I stay here” she said, hunching her shoulders.

“We’ll be back, send word if you need anything— anything at all” Molly said, hugging Susan tightly.

The Order filed out of the waiting room, leaving Remus in his chair, staring absent minded still in front of him.

“Remus, do you want to go get some sleep?” She asked

He shook his head “I’d like to stay, if that’s alright” 

“Sure, I’ll get us coffee” she said softly, turning away from him and making her way up the stairs to the food and beverage floor.

Remus’s mind kept playing the events of the night over and over, John getting hit by the killing curse, dueling with Death Eaters before turning around to see Fenrir Greyback climbing on top of Mia. He shuddered at thinking of him taking a bite out of her, the possibility of her plagued with lycanthropy made him want to vomit and punch a wall simultaneously.

Susan was back quicker than he expected with two steaming hot cups in her hands. She sat down next to him, the cup outstretched to him.

“Thanks” he mumbled. 

He sipped the coffee carefully, feeling the liquid warm him all the way down his throat. They sat in silence for a few minutes, sipping awkwardly as they stared at the floor.

“Can I share something with you?” she asked, shifting in her seat. 

“Sure” he said quietly

“I have always been hard on Mia. I expected so much from her, pushing her to be the very best she could be at everything she did. I gave her a lot of tough love, but also hovered over, maybe a bit too much at times, because I wanted her to be safe. I wanted to keep her happy, healthy, and successful.”

Remus turned his head to look at her, curious as to where she was going with her statement.

“I raised Mia to be strong-willed, independent, and assertive, much like myself. It came back to bite me in the arse a few times when I realized arguing with Mia was like arguing with myself. Two stubborn people in a disagreement doesn’t end well”

Susan and Remus both chuckled, knowing how much of a pain both she and Mia could be when you tried to argue with either of them.

“I always wondered what man she would end up with. Who would she fall in love with? Who would love her the way she deserves? Who would be good enough for my little girl? My Mia deserves the best, the absolute best. I won’t settle for less than perfect for my daughter”

Remus shifted uncomfortably, but was surprised when he looked at Susan and saw her smiling.

“I’ve been so hard on you Remus, I was so angry with both of you when I found out you had begun a relationship. I thought there were no way you were it for her. You were her teacher, you were toying with her. She told me that she loved you, you were the one, but I didn’t want that to be true. I couldn’t get passed my anger.”

Susan took his hand in hers, squeezing it gently.

“But honestly, I couldn’t think of someone better for my daughter than you, Remus Lupin” 

He blinked at her a few times, not believing that she was actually approving of them. 

“Really?” he said, sounding thick.

“Really; I just wish you maybe would’ve waited to start a relationship with her _after_ she graduated” Susan teased, making Remus chuckle sheepishly. “Oh, I just hope she’s alright back there”

He nodded, taking another sip of his coffee. “Put your faith in her; she’s strong.”

* * *

Mia woke to the bright lights and sterile white walls of St. Mungo’s feeling like she was in a dream. Her broken arm was in a sling, and she had bandages covering her scratches on her hips and thighs. There was a Healer sitting in an armchair in the corner of her room, reading the Daily Prophet and humming softly. 

“Oh, Miss Roswell, you’re awake, good, your family would like to see you. Are you ready for them to come in?” She said pleasantly. 

“My family?” she asked. 

“Yes, a...” she paused as she grabbed a clipboard with Mia’s medical chart. “a Susan Roswell and Remus Lupin. They’ve been waiting all night” 

“Yes, please” Mia said, her voice hoarse from just freshly waking up. 

She blinked around at the hospital room as she shifted to sit up. Her thighs burned against the bandages as she moved, reminding her of the events of the night before. Her heart dropped when she remembered her father, the flash of green taking the life out of him and his screams in agony.

The Healer returned with just Susan, who welled up with tears at the sight of her.

“Oh my sweet girl!” Susan cried, rushing over to hug her. 

“Hi Mum” Mia said, giving her mother an awkward one armed embrace.

“Hi sweetie— I’m so glad you are ok” Susan said, kissing Mia’s cheek. “Remus is here too, he didn’t know if you wanted to see him”

"Yes, please” Mia nodded. “I do want to see him”

Susan nodded to the Healer, who popped out of the door and waved. Remus entered the room slowly, giving her a weak smile when he saw her covered in bruises and arm in a sling. 

“Hey” he said softly, sitting on the edge of the bed at her feet.

“Hey”

They stared at each other for a moment until Remus cleared his throat and broke the awkward silence.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m alright” she said quietly, mustering up a small smile.

A knock at the door broke the awkward reunion, and entered was a short, plump balding man in Healer-in-Charge robes.

“Amelia Roswell?” the man asked, giving her a kind smile.

“The one and only” she said, nodding

“I’m the Healer-in-Charge on duty today. May I sit down?” he asked with a chuckle. 

“Of course”

He settled himself in the armchair that sat across the room, flipping her medical chart open. His robes were bright blue with an orange stripe down the sides, which differed from the other Healers who wore robes of lime green. 

"Your arm was broken in 2 places; we repaired the bones it will take a few days for the swelling to go down. You’ll want to wear that sling until then” 

Mia nodded at him, and he continued speaking.

“The scratches on your hips and thighs were quite deep, but we cleaned them out and sealed them with silver and dittany. We have bandages and healing paste on them currently, but since they were made by a werewolf, the scratches will scar.” 

“Has she been infected?” Remus asked quickly. 

“Our tests show that she currently reads negative for lycanthropy.” He said to Remus, relief flooding through him at this news. “I’ll be back in a couple hours to check on you, we’re going to keep you for a few days for monitoring. Can I get you anything in the meantime?” 

“No, thank you” she said with a polite half smile.

He gave her a warm, sympathetic smile as he exited the room. Mia slunk back onto her pillow, in her excitement to see Remus and her mother she nearly forgot the reason she was in the hospital in the first place. The scene of her father struck down by Dolohov’s deadly curse, the feeling of her nerve endings on fire from the cruciatis curse and the memory of Fenrir Greyback slicing through her legs for his own entertainment flashed in her mind’s eye. She bit her lip to keep herself from crying, her expression falling.

“Mum?”

“Hmm?”

“Dad’s dead.”

Susan looked at her, tears welling in both their eyes.

“I know, sweetie, I know”

* * *

“Well, I’m glad to see you’re eating” Susan chuckled.

Mia woofed down a large club sandwich and a Pepsi from a nearby bistro that Susan picked up for lunch, a tastier choice than what St. Mungo’s served in their visitors lounge.

“They gave an appetite potion, I heard you tell the Healers I have issues eating.” She said flatly, giving her a sideways glance.

Remus and Susan exchanged sheepish looks, remaining silent for a few minutes besides the sounds of Mia eating hungrily.

“Mum, could I have a moment alone with Remus?” she asked, after slurping down the last of her drink.

“Sure, I need to run home and shower anyway; I’ll be back in an hour if that’s alright?” Susan asked, looking to both of them.

“Yeah that’s fine” Mia said as Remus nodded to Susan.

She gathered up their lunch trash and exited the room, leaving an awkward silence between Mia and Remus. _What do I even say?_ She thought, feeling uncomfortable by the elephant in the room.

“I’m sorry” she whispered.

“It’s ok” he said softly, taking her hand.

“No, it’s not. I treated you like shit and you deserve an explanation.” She said, feeling the urge to pick at her fingernails, unable to because of her arm in the sling. “I was so upset after Sirius died. Every time I looked at you, I was reminded of him. I couldn’t get memories of the three of us out of my head, and I just couldn’t deal with it. I was angry with you because you made me think of him.” 

Mia stifled back the feeling of hot tears stinging her eyes, trying to keep a straight face. 

“I was so lost, and rather than lean on you I lashed out, and pushed you away. I turned to drugs and alcohol rather than the people who loved me”

Remus wrapped one arm around her and kissed the top of her head. “We all screw up, but it’s how we correct our mistakes that matters” he said, smiling slightly when remembering Sirius telling him the very same thing. “That’s a Sirius Black piece of advice, by the way”

“Sirius would be ashamed of me.” She said quickly, looking away from him.

“No, Mia, he wouldn’t”

“Yes he would; my dad would be too if he knew the half of what I was getting myself into while you were in Bath.”

Remus looked at her with a pained expression. “I’m so sorry about your dad” he said softly

She nodded, tears now flowing down her face. “I won’t fall apart like I did after Sirius, I swear.”

“You can grieve though; no one will fault you for that. Here, I have something for you…” 

He pulled out a small parcel wrapped in burlap and handed it to her. She looked at him puzzled as she un-wrapped it, her eyes widening with surprise when she saw the colorful glass figurine of a wolf that she had given to the werewolf staying next to Arthur in St. Mungos. She pulled the note that was attached with it, smiling when she read the yellowed parchment.

_You will get through this._

“I ran into an old friend while I was underground. I told him about Sirius, and how much it affected you. He wanted me to tell you thank you, that you helped him, and he wanted to return the favor.”

She nodded as she choked on a deep breath, smiling through her tears. She rested her head on his shoulder, clutching the wolf figurine to her chest and remaining quiet for a minute as she calmed herself down to intermittent sniffles.

“Your mother approves of us, by the way.” He said, breaking the silence.

“What?” she snorted, looking at him surprised.

“Yeah, she told me she couldn’t think of anyone better for you than me.” He chuckled.

Mia hunched her shoulders as she felt elephant in the room return. “But I left you…” she said quietly.

“Don’t be ridiculous” he said, turning her head and kissing her gently, pulling away just an inch. “If you want me, I am yours.”

Mia crashed her lips back against his, more tears spilling as she cupped his face with her one free hand, his stubble scratching her palm. She had forgotten how he made her stomach feel like it was full of butterflies when he kissed her, and how pillow soft his lips were as they pressed against hers. How could she have forgotten?

“Hi, Miss Roswell?”

A short, graying witch with a friendly smile was standing in the doorway with a tray of gauze and jars of various colored pastes and ointments. Remus pulled away and coughed awkwardly as Mia turned a deep shade of scarlet.

“Sorry to interrupt, it’s time to change your bandages.” The Healer said. “Sir, would you mind stepping out of the room for a few moments?” 

Remus nodded and stood to leave, but Mia grabbed his hand to stop him.

“Can he stay?” she asked. 

“If you don’t mind him in here while we change them, he may stay.” The Healer said kindly. 

Remus settled back at where he sat before. Mia smiled at him, but looked uncomfortable “Just don’t look though— ok?”

He nodded as two more Healers entered the room, and began pulling up the sheets to change her bandages. They pulled the gauze off one of her thighs, revealing 4 long, deep scratches that started at her hipbone and traveled down to her mid-thigh. Despite her plea, Remus looked instinctively, anger flooding through him when he saw her horrific injury. He vowed he would kill Fenrir Greyback for mutilating her beautiful, soft skin— scarring her forever. The Healers had fresh healing paste applied and bandages changed in about 30 seconds, then pulled the covers back down over her legs and exited the room. 

“I told you not to look” she whispered, his gaze still fixated on her thighs, even though they were now covered. 

“He did this because of me.” He said quietly. “Had I not been there with you, he wouldn’t’ve paid as much attention to you”

“What makes you think that?”

“He despises me because I despise what I am. He wanted me to join his pack many years ago, and I refused. I didn’t want to live with the stigma written across my forehead— even though it practically is.” 

“I don’t get why he would hate you just because you didn’t want to join his pack.” Mia asked, puzzled. 

“Fenrir turned me.” Remus said, looking down at the floor. 

“WHAT?!”

“My father had made an anti-werewolf comment in front of him when I was a boy; said werewolves didn’t deserve to live. Fenrir got his revenge by positioning himself near our house right before the full moon, so he would turn and attack me. My father fought him off, but I had already been infected. He found me right after I graduated from Hogwarts, wanted me to come join the pack, saying I should be with my own kind. I didn’t like his values and what he stood for, and I refused.” Remus’s face was twisted in anguish. “He knew my father would’ve been heartbroken if I joined a werewolf pack, which I think was why he was so insistent.”

“I had no idea, I am so sorry...”she started, but he held his hand up to silence her. 

They sat in silence for a couple minutes, Remus regaining his composure from recounting his attack.

“Remus… can I ask you something?” Mia began, wishing desperately to pick her fingernails. 

“Of course” he said, shifting to sit next to her on the bed and putting his arm around her. 

“He said something about that you didn’t mark me? That it was irresponsible?” she started, turning her head to look at him. 

He didn’t return her gaze, instead was looking at the wall across from them, expression firm as stone. 

“He did” He said evenly. 

“What is ‘marking’?” she asked

“Something I would never do to you.” he replied coolly. 

“That didn’t answer my question.”

Remus sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He fixed his gaze on a point on the wall in front of them.

“It’s a curse that is associated with my kind. It’s a ritual used amongst packs to distinguish one’s mate. When a mate is marked, they cannot be pursued by another werewolf. It’s meant to be strictly amongst werewolves, but some have been known to mark humans as well” Remus slunk back in his chair drumming his fingers slightly on the armrest “It’s actually illegal to mark a human as a mate”

“Why would he say you should’ve marked me?”

“It was a threat. He said it to let me know he could touch you, if he wanted. He likes to be in control, have power over others. He was showing me he has power over me by threatening you.”

Mia shuttered, the thought of Fenrir Greyback coming anywhere near her made her sick.

“What would happen if a werewolf tried to shag someone who was marked by someone else?”

“They can’t. The curse wouldn’t even let them try. It’s a very powerful form of dark magic.”

She nodded and pondered that thought for a moment, wondering if Fenrir was just making idle threats for fun, or if he would be a problem in the future. Her mind then wandered to Dolohov, remembering his twisted face purple with rage as he snapped her arm like a twig.

“Do you think Dolohov and the others are going to try to attack again? He seemed really angry with mum.”

“I don’t know, but we’re going to come up with a plan to try to make sure this doesn’t happen again.” Remus tried to give her a reassuring smile “I will do everything in my power to keep you safe”

Silence fell again as Mia was unassured that another attack would be preventable. Scenes from the attack flashed like pictures in her mind; her father on the ground dead, Dolohov’s purple face, Fenrir’s carnivorous smile. 

“Will you lay with me?” She said as she shifted to one side of the bed and patted the now empty space next to her. 

Remus gave a small smile as he moved from his chair to the hospital bed, lying on his side and letting Mia snuggle up next to him. He wrapped his arm around her, careful not to touch her injured arm, and kissed the top of her head. Mia closed her eyes, feeling comfort in the feeling of him next to her, inhaling the scent of his cologne that she didn’t realize how much she missed until this moment. She had forgotten how the mahogany and teakwood notes blended with his natural pheromones made her feel cozy, warm and protected. How could she have forgotten?

“I missed you” she whispered.

He nuzzled the top of her head with his cheek and chuckled softly. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you” 

* * *

The next few days at St. Mungo’s were relatively uneventful. Mia was given sleeping draught every night, allowing her a full nights rest to recover from her injuries. She liked sleeping draughts; it was the most blissful, restful sleep. Nothing terrible ever invaded her slumber while under its effects.

Mia had a revolving door of visitors, mainly members of the Order of the Phoenix, but Penelope also was there before and after work most of the days. Bill was discharged within 12 hours of admittance, while Moody had to spend a whole 48 hours, due to the fact he was convinced one of the Healers had laced his potions with poison, refusing to drink anything not brewed by himself.

On the 4th day of her stay, Remus and Susan got into a few matches of wizard’s chess as Mia watched, impressed with how well the two of them were getting along. She never expected her mother and Remus to be able to be friendly with each other again, but she would be lying if she said she wasn’t happy about it.

Remus was about to call checkmate for the third game in a row when the Healer in Charge entered the room to present Mia’s discharge instructions.

“Good afternoon, Miss Roswell. Ready to go home?” the Healer in Charge asked, giving her a small smile.

“Yes” Mia said with emphasis, eager to get back home and into her own bed.

“Great; I’ve got a few papers for you to sign, plus I wanted to go over some things before you left”

Mia took the papers and quill the Healer brought in, scrawling her name on the few signature lines he had highlighted.

“Now, we were informed that you witnessed a murder at the time of your injuries?”

Mia nodded her head, slinking back against the pillow. “My father” she whispered

The Healer in Charge let out a heavy breath. “I am so sorry for your loss. I recommend carrying calming draught with you, just in case of any flashbacks, and we will be having you back for weekly sessions with one of our trauma counselors”

Mia groaned “Sir, I don’t think I need…”

“Amelia” the Healer in Charge cut her off, looking at her sternly. “What you witnessed was terrible. It looks like in your chart this won’t be the first time you’ve seen the counselors here?”

“Yes, my ex-husband was tortured in front of her when she was four” Susan answered for her.

“PTSD is not something to take lightly; you know this if you’ve suffered from it before.” The Healer in Charge said plainly. “Counselling will start next week. I’m also going to send you home with a couple sleeping draughts but I’d like you to try not to use them unless absolutely necessary. Save it for a very bad night.”

“Yes sir” Mia whispered.

“Great, I’ll get these papers processed, and I’ll be back in a few to assist with your departure. How are we getting home? Floo?”

“Muggle car, I can drive” Susan answered for her again.

The Healer in Charge nodded, and exited the room. Remus took Mia’s hand and squeezed it reassuringly. Mia looked into his eyes, their clear blue appearance making her feel comforted. He looked quite shabby, unshaven since he had been more focused on her than himself, yet still so handsome. Susan came and sat on the other side of her, taking a breath before speaking.

“Mia, I need to talk to you about your father’s funeral. I made arrangements” She said, trying to keep her voice steady.

Mia looked up at her, her heartbeat quickening slightly. “What kind of arrangements?” 

“Well, the funeral will be here, in London, in two days. A few of the gentlemen on his unit will serve as the pallbearers. He’ll be given a service with full honors, and the wake afterwards will be at my house. Miranda’s parents are flying in for it.”

Mia hadn’t seen Miranda’s parents since shortly after she died, and felt very odd about the slight surge of excitement to see them. It seemed inappropriate to be happy to see them when the whole reason they were going to be here was because her father was killed.

“What does everyone think happened to him?”

Susan coughed awkwardly, looking at Remus for a moment before answering Mia.

“Every muggle that witnessed the attack had their memory modified to believe he had a heart attack in his office”

“A heart attack??” Mia said incredulously, her voice rising. “That’s a disgrace to his name! He was murdered in cold blood, and everyone is going to think he died of a heart attack?? He was forty fucking five, how can that even be believable?!” she yelled, her blood now boiling.

“I AGREE!” Susan snapped, giving Mia a stern look, willing her to calm down. “But I didn’t have a choice in the matter. The Ministry decided that was the story. I’m just as upset about it as you.”

They were interrupted by the Healer in Charge knocking on the door, painfully unaware of the conversation he was breaking up.

“Alright Miss Roswell, we’re ready to take you to your car now”

“Can we have just a minute, please?” Remus asked politely, noticing the tears welling up in Mia and Susan’s eyes.

“Sure, I’ll be back in just a few minutes”

Susan wiped her eyes quickly and began throwing some of her things she had brought to the hospital into their bags as the three of them remained silent. Mia fidgeted with her arm sling as she tried to calm herself down, trying to settle the rising anger she felt at the Ministry’s cop-out excuse for her father’s death.

“This isn’t fair” Mia whispered “Why does everyone I love have to die?”


	37. Chapter 37

Getting ready for John’s funeral felt like an unpleasant dream; not quite a nightmare to where Mia would wake up in a cold sweat, but like a dream that made her feel unsettled and anxious upon awakening. Mia looked at herself in the mirror, smoothing the creases of her dress, feeling the texture of her freshly healed scars through the fabric. The black dress looked modest and respectful, perfect for attending such a stately event. She was happy to be out of her arm sling, but her range of motion was still not 100%, wincing as she overstretched her arm to reach a pearl necklace draped over the side of her jewelry box. She fastened it around her neck, her heart sinking as she looked at herself in her funeral attire. 

_I can’t believe I am burying my father._

She hadn’t been to a funeral since Miranda died; with Sirius, there was no body to bury. She had been just 13 when Miranda had passed, just a child. Now, as an adult, was there an expectation to not cry? An expectation to stay poised and calm during the whole service? She didn’t know how she was supposed to feel today— was she even supposed to feel at all? She took her vial of calming draught from the dresser, packaged in a small dropper bottle, and tucked it in her bra, just in case. A soft knock at the door caught her attention as Remus appeared in the doorway of her bedroom.

“You ready to go?” he asked, leaning his cheek against the doorframe.

She looked to him, his crystal blue eyes and soft expression making her feel a little more at ease; maybe she could get through this day a little easier with him by her side. She was thankful to have him back, to let him to comfort her through this instead of lashing out and pushing him away. Visions of the night before danced in her mind’s eye; their bodies pressing together rhythmically as they made love for the first time in months, the whisper soft circles he drew on her back as she buried her face into his neck, sobbing over the events of the day she watched her father die, and the soothing words of affirmation he murmured into her ear as she drifted off to sleep. She felt a wave of affection for him, wishing to herself she would’ve allowed him to take care of her like this after Sirius.

“Yeah” she said softly, brushing her over the skirt of her dress one more time, sneaking another look at herself.

The Air Force had allowed Susan, Mia, Remus and Penelope a black limousine to transport them from the funeral home to the hanger where the service would be conducted. His body was being flown back to America, where Miranda’s parents would lay him to rest privately. Mia sat close to Remus in the car, his hand on her knee reassuringly. He was dressed in his only good suit, the smell of his mahogany and teakwood cologne something familiar and grounding for her. She allowed herself to lean against him, feeling the stiff wool of his winter coat sticking to her coat like Velcro. Penelope kept Susan and her distracted with small talk, trying to keep the mood light as they drove directly behind the herse.

Arriving at the hanger, they were escorted by an airman in dress uniform to an altar they had set up not too far from the plane that would be carrying the casket. Mia felt comfort in seeing that many of the members of the Order of the Phoenix had turned up to show their support. Kingsley and Tonks were standing with their arms linked, Tonks’s hair a very plain shade of brown. Moody was behind them in a large black trench coat, a black bowler hat pulled over his magical eye. Molly and Arthur looked very different to her in muggle dress clothes; she was comforted by the warm expressions on their faces. Fleur was attracting attention from a few airmen that lingered around, as she hung on tightly to Bill’s arm. Miranda’s parents were also already there, dressed in their thick black dress coats, somber moods reflected on their mature faces.

“Mia…” the woman said, walking over to her when she noticed her.

“Hi, Brenda” Mia said weakly, hugging the graying woman. “Hi, Paul” she said, breaking the hug with Brenda to shake Miranda’s father’s hand.

“Hi Mia, I wish we were seeing you on better terms. I’m so sorry for your loss” Paul said, his facial expression making Mia want to start crying already.

“Thank you” She croaked hoarsely, trying to muster up a smile.

“You are so grown up, so beautiful” Brenda whispered to her, giving her another hug. “We’d love to have you back to the US to visit; it’s been too long”

Susan came over to them, placing a hand on Mia’s shoulder.

“I think we’re getting ready to start” Susan said softly.

The group nodded, and found spots around the wooden altar. There were candles lit on gold posts around the area where the casket would be placed, the flames flickering in the soft breeze. A large headshot photograph of John sat on an easel; he dressed in his Air Force dress uniform, and a golden plaque at the bottom reading _Lt. Colonel John W. Roswell, 1951-1996._ Mia couldn’t help but think how handsome her father looked, his rank pins sparkling in the photo as if he were real- sitting across from her, able to be touched if she just reached her hand out.

It was crisp and cold as they stood waiting, almost as if dementors were nearby, sucking all the happiness and warmth out of the air. Mia wrapped her coat around her tightly, shoving her hands in the pockets firmly. Penelope looked at her with a somber expression, linking arms with her and shoving her hands into her coat pockets as well, both of them shivering as they watched their breath fog in front of them.

The sound of snare drums tapping made everyone’s attention turn to the group walking towards them with a casket draped with the American flag being led by a group of airmen carrying rifles. The airmen with rifles stopped a few yards from them, while the airmen carrying the casket continued, placing the casket on the altar gently. There were eight men serving as pallbearers, all donning their dark blue dress uniforms that were pressed to perfection. Mia only recognized two of them— one being Kyle, the very tall buff airman from the night at Top Hats the previous month, and Eric. The airmen congregated on the other side of the casket, Eric’s eyes flickering to Mia for a moment as he stood across from her. She felt odd looking at him, knowing he witnessed John murdered in cold blood, but had no recollection of the event. His memory was modified along with the other witnesses, He thinking he found John unconscious in his office.

The funeral service started with Brenda’s eulogy, followed by a few airmen speaking about working with John and his life in the military. Mia listened intently to the words being spoken by those close with her father. Around 70 airmen of all different ranks were there to pay their respects to her father, making her heart ache for them as well as for herself. The airmen with rifles performed the 21 gun salute, and Mia felt Remus flinch behind her at the first round of gun shots. He had his hands on her shoulders reassuringly, his presence comforting her immensely. Eric’s eyes flickered from him to Mia to the casket during the whole service, trying to hide his dissatisfaction at seeing the two of them together. By the end of the 21 gun salute, Mia had tears streaming down her face. She took deep breaths, trying to maintain as much composure as she possibly could in this moment.

Two airmen removed the American flag draped over John’s casket and began folding it into a neat triangle. 

“The United States Air Force is presenting our country’s flag to Lt. Colonel Roswell’s only daughter, Amelia” Said the pastor leading the funeral.

One of the airmen took the flag and kneeled in front of Mia. “On behalf of the President of the United States, The United States Air Force, and a grateful nation, please accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation for your loved one’s honorable and faithful service” the airman said, holding the neatly folded flag out to her.

Mia held her chin up as she accepted the flag, clenching her jaw to keep her chin from quivering. Remus squeezed her shoulders gently as another tear ran down her cheek. Each pallbearer came and saluted her before taking their place around John’s casket, Eric last in line. His facial expression somber and firm, but had gentleness to the way he looked at her as he slowly saluted her. She blinked a few more tears, feeling Remus’s hands tighten on her shoulders. Eric’s eyes darted to Remus, for just a second, before he turned and took his place around the casket. The pallbearers lifted the casket off the altar, and marched it towards the plane a few yards away, disappearing inside the cargo hold. A lone cornet, audible but hidden, began playing TAPS as the guests started to disperse. The slow, stately sound of the horn’s song gave an odd tranquility to the scene around them.

Susan was sobbing profusely, her face patchy and red as she furiously wiped her face, smearing her mascara and trying to hide her tears. Molly came around and wrapped her arm around her shoulders to comfort her as they turned to exit the hanger. Mia and Remus turned to leave as well, she clutching the American flag to her chest as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

“You ok?” he asked softly.

“Yeah” she whispered, not sure if she believed herself.

Remus squeezed her softly in reassurance, but turned to look over his shoulder back at the funeral altar. He saw the airmen exiting the cargo hold of the plane, and locked eyes with Eric for a moment. Eric’s face was now scowling as he shot an unpleasant stare at Remus. Remus smirked at him, then turned his head back and pulled Mia tighter to him.

* * *

The wake at Susan’s house was crowded with many people there to pay their respects to John’s family. Mia was growing tired of having the same conversations with everyone; sorry for her loss, and how much they liked John and would miss him, how they never knew his heart was in such bad shape for a man of his young age. (“45— it’s just so young!”). She had tried to stay near Penelope and Remus, receiving sideways glances from Eric every time they were in the same room together. She wanted a few moments alone to collect her thoughts, so she grabbed a bottle of gin from her mother’s liquor cabinet and made her way upstairs to her old bedroom. Remus was in deep conversation with Penelope, Tonks and Kingsley, so she felt it was the perfect time to sneak away.

She entered her old bedroom, feeling comforted by the white shaggy rug and teal walls that she had called home for so many years. She admired the photographs she had pinned to a corkboard on her wall, images of her and Miranda at the beach in Florida, a photo of her and her mother at Kings Cross before her 2nd year at Hogwarts, and a photo of her and Penelope in front of the Clearwater’s Christmas tree, Penelope’s braces she donned at age 14 on display for the photograph with her wide, cheesy adolescent smile. She kicked her heels off and sat down on the rug and leaned her back against her old bed, uncorking the bottle of gin. She lifted the bottle to her lips and drank right from it, the liquid warming her belly as she swallowed. She felt guilty for retreating into her room with the bottle, having promised herself she wouldn’t use alcohol as a coping mechanism anymore. _Just for today_ she told herself _this is the last time._ She took a few more swigs of gin before resting her head back and closing her eyes. 

“Want some company?” a voice spoke from the doorway.

Mia opened her eyes to see Eric standing in the doorway to her room, his dress uniform hat in his hands and his black dress shoes shining like mirrors, reflecting the entire bedroom.

“Hi Eric” Mia said softly, taking another swig of gin.

Eric entered the room and sat next to Mia, albeit a little closer than she wanted, making her scooch an inch over.

“Listen, I’m really sorry about your dad. I mean, a heart attack at 45, it’s almost unheard of…” he started, but she put her hand up to silence him.

“Please— everyone has been saying that to me today” she said flatly.

He nodded, his attention turning to the bottle of gin in her hands.

“Care to share?” he asked, giving her a slight grin.

Mia handed him the bottle without saying anything, beginning to pick at her fingernails as Eric took a big swig.

“So I see your sugar daddy is back” he said frankly, setting the bottle between his legs.

“My what?” she snorted, turning to look at him incredulously.

“Your sugar daddy, the old guy you hang with.” Eric shrugged.

“Remus? He’s not my sugar daddy.” She rolled her eyes and scoffed at him, feeling irritation rise in her.

“Ok, not sugar daddy then” Eric muttered, taking another sip then sighing. “I tried calling you a few times, where have you been?” 

“I was, er— indisposed” she said awkwardly

Eric looked at her concerned. “Penelope said you were sick when I called”

“Yeah, yeah I was…” she said quickly, her brain swimming with what to say— she hadn’t prepared an airtight alibi for her time in St. Mungos.

“But you can’t use a phone when you’re sick?”

“Eric…” she was cut off by Eric cupping her face with his hand and kissing her.

Mia pulled her head away, her hand flying up to Eric’s mouth to keep him from kissing her again.

“I am with Remus” she said firmly.

His eyes darkened as he clenched his jaw.

“What can that old guy give you that I can’t??” he growled.

 _An orgasm_ Mia thought, but figured it would be unwise to say that in this moment.

“Remus and I have a lot of history. Hooking up with you was— _shit._ ” She swore under her breath, trying to think of what to say, but was struggling; she had no idea what to say. “I just— I just want to be friends. I’m sorry if I led you on; I was in a different place that night”

“What’s changed since then? Because you seemed pretty into me that night” Eric sneered, fidgeting with the bottle of gin.

“I—“Her voice caught in her throat; she knew she screwed up by sleeping with Eric, and it was coming back to bite her. She grabbed the bottle out of Eric’s hand, taking a large swig, the burning sensation making her cough. 

“Listen Mia, I want this. I want you…” Eric said softly, leaning back in to kiss her.

He ran his hand up her leg under her dress, his face puzzling when his fingertips hit the large raised scars.

“What is that?” he asked, furrowing his brow.

“Nothing!” she squeaked, scrambling to get up.

“Wait Mia, what happened?”

“Nothing— you should go” Mia choked

She was starting to panic; she wasn’t going to be able to lie her way out of the giant scars on her legs, let alone she didn’t want him anywhere near them. She felt like everything around her was spinning, she was dizzy from her shallowed breathing. The flashback of that day began to flood through her mind as she squeezed her eyes shut.

_I’m going to break every bone in your body as your bitch mother watches!_

Dolohov’s voice rang in her head, as she remembered the feeling of her arm snapping in half. Her ears began to hum as she recalled the feeling of Fenrir Greyback slicing through her legs like butter. She broke into a sweat; she realized she was having a panic attack as the edges of her vision began to haze.

“Hey, hey, talk to me” he said, wrapping his arms around her waist.

She put her hands on his chest, feeling extremely claustrophobic by his presence. She felt a strange tingling in her palms as she pushed him away, almost like an electric shock. She wouldn’t meet his gaze, her chin quivering as she held back panicked tears, making him look at her more intently.

“Did he do that to you?” Eric asked, his eyes narrowing as he reached for waist again.

“I believe she told you to go” Remus said in the doorway, his eyes flickering dangerously at Eric.

Penelope and Remus entered the bedroom, Remus holding the door open for Eric. Eric let go of Mia’s waist, his eyes burning into Remus’s.

“Sure, sugar daddy, I’ll go.” He said sharply.

Eric turned back to Mia, his expression softening. 

“If you need anything, anything at all, you know how to find me.” 

Mia didn’t answer him, but watched him as he exited the bedroom and listened to his footsteps decent down the stairs. She yanked the vial of calming draught out of her bra and dropped a couple drops on her tongue, feeling her heartbeat slow as the draught kicked into effect.

“You alright?” Remus asked stiffly.

She didn’t answer, but gave him a small nod. Her shaking hands moved down to where her scars were, thinking about what Eric would’ve thought had he seen the scratches. 

_Let me give you something to remember me by._

She shook off the memory of the sinister grin that followed that sentence. What would she have said? Would there have been a good way to explain large slashes on her body to a muggle? She sunk onto the bed, hunching her shoulders.

“That bloke is asking to get his dick hexed off” Remus growled, looking back at the doorway where Eric had left just a moment before. “Has he gotten that fresh with you before?”

Mia started picking at her fingernails; she hadn’t wanted to tell Remus about what had happened with Eric at Top Hats, but she knew she couldn’t lie when he asked her a direct question like that.

“I fucked him in the bathroom at a bar a couple weeks ago.” She said flatly, not meeting his eyes.

“You— you did… _what?_ ” Remus hissed, his temper rising.

“It was a bad night, she was drunk and you two weren’t together. Let’s not talk about this today” Penelope jumped in, trying to deescalate.

“I’ll kill him” he said through gritted teeth, making to exit the room.

“Remus!” Penelope snapped, blocking him. “No. Not here. Not today. It’s her father’s funeral for heaven’s sake.”

“I don’t like that cocky little shit; he reminds me of that Andrew Flint” he growled, wagging his finger at the air with one hand as he ran another through his graying hair. “Complete disregard for needs other than their own, easily able to win one’s trust with their charming smiles—“ Remus turned to Mia, looking stern. “You are too friendly with these boys; it gives them the wrong idea”

“I’m sorry!” Mia squeaked, her eyes leaking hot, salty tears 

Mia slunk back feeling shameful, but she reminded herself that one kiss with Andrew should not have given him the impression that she wanted to date him, But Eric— she did more than just kiss him. But Eric wouldn’t force himself on her; she felt Eric was a better man than Andrew ever was. Despite him completely ignoring the fact that she was with Remus, she knew he would never take it if she didn’t consent. She took another swig of gin, hoping just another sip would take the edge off the rush of emotions flooding though her.

“Remus— how _dare_ you! How dare you slut shame her!” Penelope hissed, rounding on him and poking his chest as she spoke.

“No— I didn’t mean—“

“This is _nothing_ like the situation with Andrew.” Penelope’s eyes burned into Remus’s. “You will _not_ make her feel like she is to blame. Andrew was a foul git who got smashed out of his mind and went on an angry power trip. Eric didn’t force himself on her— yes, he probably should respect that you two are back together now, but in his defense, Mia and you weren’t together the night they shagged. What’s done is done— punching him in the face will do no good””

“You’re right, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve said—I didn’t mean— I’m sorry” Remus stopped abruptly, realizing he put his foot in his mouth and wasn’t going to be able to recover well from his comment. He took a deep breath and rubbed his face vigorously before speaking again. “Mia, how are you doing? What can I do for you?” he asked, trying to recover from his bruised ego. He kneeled on the ground in front of her, looking at her apologetically.

“I want to go home” she said softly, looking at the two of them with a bleak expression. “I don’t want to be here anymore”

He leaned forward and kissed her forehead gently “I’ll go tell Susan we’re leaving.” 

He stood up and gave Penelope the same apologetic look, for which she returned a scowl. He ran a hand awkwardly through his hair as he exited the bedroom, Penelope’s eyes burning a hole in the back of his head until he was out of sight

“You ok?” Penelope said to Mia after Remus was gone. “I don’t think he meant to hurt you by any of that, I think he was just caught off guard, and well— we know he gets a little jealous.”

“Its fine, I don’t hold it against him” she said as she wiped her tears. “I can’t say that I wouldn’t be a little upset if the roles were reversed.” Mia took a hearty swig of gin, coughing slightly as the liquid burned her throat “Thanks for ripping his ass for me, though”

“Of course” Penelope said as she plopped down next to her “Now give me that bottle— we agreed no alcohol to subdue feelings, remember?”

 

Downstairs, Eric made his way over to Kyle and his group of friends that were congregating in Susan’s kitchen. Jason and Pat, from the night at the bar, had attended the funeral along with a few other men in their unit. They were all standing around with plates of food in their hands, turning to grin at Eric as he walked up.

“Where were you, Richardson?” Kyle asked with a sly smile.

“I saw him follow Mia upstairs” Pat jeered, winking at Eric.

Eric let out a cynical laugh, leaning against the kitchen counter and looking out at the rest of the house that was visible from the kitchen.

“Dude, you tapped that? Just now?” Jason asked, raising his hand to give Eric a high five.

“Nah, the sugar daddy got in the way.” Eric said flatly, feeling a little loose lipped from the few swigs of gin.

“Who?” Pat asked, looking puzzled.

Eric turned to the bottles of alcohol that Susan had set out on the kitchen counter and poured himself a glass of scotch, taking a hearty sip.

“The geezer that hangs around her; I think he hits her, or something”

“What the fuck are you going on about” Kyle snorted incredulously.

“I’m not sure, but there’s something going on. She was really weird today.” 

“Uh… her father died?” Jason suggested.

“Nah, it’s something else.” Eric said, taking a sip of his scotch.

He looked out to the rest of the house to see Remus walk over to Susan, whisper something in her ear, and then turn to walk back to the stairs. Eric set his glass down and made his way over to Remus, his ears burning hot and anger surging through him.

“Going to smack her around up there?” Eric snapped as Remus had started up the stairs. “Punish her for talking to me?”

He turned around and rolled his eyes, stepping back down onto the landing.

“You don’t know what you are talking about” Remus said flatly.

“I felt those marks on her thigh; I find it strange that she got an injury she couldn’t explain”

“Not only does she _not_ have to explain herself to you, but I find it strange that you tried to slide your hand up another man’s girlfriend’s dress.” Remus took a step towards Eric, the shadow of the wolf inside him sweeping across his expression. “She is _mine_ , you hear me?”

Then men stood glowering at each other, ready to strike if the other struck first. Eric was maybe 6 inches shorter than him, but not intimidated by Remus towering height.

“A little possessive, huh sugar daddy?” Eric sneered “Bet it drives you nuts to know I was balls deep in her a couple weeks ago?”

Maybe” Remus smirked, his eye flashing dangerously. He stepped closer his face just inches from Eric’s. “But it’s my name she’ll be moaning tonight—“ he leaned in to whisper in Eric’s ear, speaking with a slightly threatening undertone “—Bet that drives you nuts.” 

Eric watched him intently as Remus turned and went back up the stairs, not looking back. Eric let out a huff and stormed back into the kitchen, his friends looking at him with puzzled expressions.

“Fucking woman beater” Eric grumbled under his breath, pouring a glass of scotch and downing it in one gulp.

He slammed the glass down on the marble counter, shaking his head furiously from the burn of the scotch. There was something going on, and he was going to figure it out.


	38. chapter 38

Mia walked into St. Mungo’s dreading the idea of having to spend one hour each week talking about her feelings. She hated sharing her emotions and thoughts even with her closest confidants, and to share them with a perfect stranger seemed much more undesirable. 

She spent the first year she was back in the UK as a child at weekly appointments with a counselor at the hospital, which she felt was more than enough therapy to last a lifetime. She wasn’t sure how different therapy would be as an adult— as a child; she did a lot of drawing and playing with dolls during her visits. She was pretty certain she wouldn’t be spending the next hour drawing a scene from a recurring nightmare, or situating Malibu Barbie behind the couch inside a doll house— as to depict the night Antonin Dolohov made a house call. Would it be like the movies, where the counselor sat across from the lying down patient, asking them ‘and how do you feel about that’? Or would the counselor just simply want her to recant her experience of watching her father fall still as stone in front of her, as the Death Eaters jeered and laughed— enjoying taking an innocent life for sport.

She felt sick, uncomfortable and anxious as she walked to the Welcome Witch’s desk, her hand intertwined with Remus’s as he dragged her along, her pace much slower than his to try to prolong the inevitable.

“Amelia Roswell, Trauma counselling” Remus said to the woman.

“Yes, fourth floor” the Welcome Witch said, her tone bored and uninterested.

Remus continued to pull her along, and led her up to the fourth floor as directed. Mia was hoping Remus would be able to stay with her through her appointment; recalled a few visits where her mother joined her when she was a child, so maybe the counselor would let him stay? They were greeted by a plump, friendly witch in lime green healer robes as they found a row of rooms labeled _'Behavioral Services.'_

“Hello, you must be Amelia?” the Healer said with a cheery smile.

“Mia” she grumbled, feeling uneasy.

“Mia, sure, please come in, you’re in this first room here— Sir, you are welcome to wait in our visitor’s area on the 5th floor.”

“Sure, I’ll do that” Remus nodded to the Healer.

“You can’t stay??” she said, grabbing his arm.

“I’ll see you in an hour” he said, kissing her cheek and turning to leave. “I’ll be one floor up”

“Don’t leave me with these whackos!” she whispered, her eyes darting around wildly.

“You will be just fine” he chuckled, winking at her and setting off down the hall. “One hour— it won’t kill you”

“ _Fuck_ ” she hissed under her breath.

She turned back slowly to the cheery faced Healer, giving her a pathetic excuse of a smile.

“Come inside, Mia, Helen will be with you shortly.” 

Mia entered the dimly lit office and sat on the black leather couch that the Healer had ushered her to. She looked around the room to find it very plain, especially for this close to Christmas; the walls were painted a neutral shade of taupe, there were some fake plants situated in the corner to her left, and the counselor’s desk was very neat and organized. There was a large red armchair situated to the right of the couch, making Mia question if she was supposed to have sat there instead. There was a placard on the front of the desk that read Helen Davies, TBS, as well as a photograph of a young couple holding a baby in front of a charming blue house. An owl perch was nestled in the corner opposite the plants, but no owl was to be found.

The office was much different than she remembered the room she used to have therapy in; the room for children was packed full of toys and art supplies, with pretty paintings tacked on the walls. This room felt stiffer, more clinical— and to Mia’s thoughts, a ‘bullshit’ place to be.

A small glass figurine of an eagle on the coffee table caught her eye, Mia picking it up and examining it close to her face. It reminded her of the glass wolf figurine she had purchased for the nameless werewolf she had befriended the previous year; the figurine that now sat on her dresser next to her photo frames, on display for anyone who entered her bedroom.

A knock on the door made her jump slightly; a tall, blonde witch entered the room wearing magenta robes with the St. Mungo’s insignia of a wand crossed with a bone on the left breast pocket.

“Hi, Amelia?” the woman asked, smiling kindly.

“Mia”

“Yes, Mia then— my name is Helen Davies, the Trauma and Behavior Specialist here at St. Mungos” she said, situating herself in the red armchair across from Mia.

“Nice to meet you, Madam Davies” Mia said politely, setting the eagle figurine back onto the coffee table.

“Oh, Helen is just fine. I see you are admiring my eagle, were you a Ravenclaw too?”

“I was, so was my mum.”

She shifted awkwardly as she began to pick her fingernails— Helen picked up on this, and conjured a clipboard out of thin air and started to scribble.

“There’s no need to be nervous, Mia” she said kindly, her voice soothing.

“I’m not nervous” Mia said, an edge to her tone.

Helen smiled politely and scribbled something else before waving her wand again, a file appearing with ‘ROSWELL, AMELIA E’ stamped in large red letters across the front of it.

“Let’s go over some basic information before we begin. Can you tell me your full name and birthdate?”

“Don’t you have that in my file?” Mia asked pointedly.

“Yes, but I need to know that you know who you are” she said calmly.

Mia rolled her eyes. “Ok…. Amelia Evelyn Roswell, born September 4th, 1975.”

“And today's date?”

“December 20th, 1996”

“Good, good. Ok, so it looks like you’ve had some bad things happen recently.” Helen said, looking at the file.

“Yeah, you could say that”

“Can you tell me what happened?”

Mia scoffed. “It’s in the chart, isn’t it?” she said pointedly

Helen just looked at Mia, her expression patient and kind.

“Oh I get it, ‘you need to know that I know what happened’— right?”

Helen nodded, waiting for Mia to speak, but was met with only silence.

“There is a confidentially charm placed on this room. What is said in here cannot be repeated by me except to you, unless you give me permission to talk about it with someone else. You of course, can share whatever you like with whomever you like. It’s a very powerful enchantment, so basically what happens in my office stays in my office.”

Mia huffed, feeling irritated with the idea that her mind was going to get poked and prodded by a complete stranger.

“So, can you tell me what happened?”

“Tell you what happened” Mia scoffed under her breath. “Sure, why don’t we just go over my life’s story, it’s quite nice” Mia continued heatedly. “I watched my father be tortured as a child, then; my stepmother dies of cancer when she’s like, 37— which is horse shit.”

Helen nodded as she wrote on her clipboard, irritating Mia even more.

“Then, my best friend is killed right in front of me— not even a year later my father is too, by a Death Eater who hates my mum. Oh— _and_ there’s a psychotic werewolf who only wants to hurt me to get to my boyfriend.”

Mia clamped her hands together, giving Helen a callous shrug of her shoulders.

“So, there you go. What more do you want?”

Helen just looked at her with a patient, kind expression.

“I’d like to talk with you about these things” she said smoothly.

“Well, I don’t want to talk about them right now.” Mia said, springing up from the couch and crossing her arms.

She made her way over to a window that overlooked the streets of London, observing the hustle and bustle of clueless muggles walking up and down the sidewalks. Part of her wished this was like when she was a child, she would much prefer drawing self-portraits than talking.

“Let’s talk about something else, then. You said you had a boyfriend, was that the handsome gentleman that brought you today?” Helen asked.

Mia looked at Helen out of the corner of her eye, her brow rising curiously. “Yeah, that’s Remus.”

“Well, let’s talk about Remus then.” She said smiling, motioning Mia to sit back down on the couch.

Mia turned back and stared at her for a minute, exhaling slowly, chewing on her bottom lip. She took a few steps back to the couch and sat down slowly, sitting on her hands to keep herself from fidgeting.

“Good— now, how did you meet Remus?” Helen said, placing a quill to her clipboard.

Mia let out a bark of laughter and shook her head.

“Let’s not start there.”

* * *

Christmas day came with a blanket of snow, hugging all parts of the city view from the flat’s living room window. Penelope and Mia’s mini Christmas tree sat in far corner of the living room, decorated with glittered gold and purple ornaments, giving off a soft, warm white glow that made the flat seem just a touch cozier. Their stockings were hung over the fireplace mantle, one for each Remus, Mia and Penelope. Even the owls, Lionel and Frankie, had garland draped around their perches for added festivity. Penelope had been with her parents all day, whilst Remus, Mia and Susan spent the better chunk of the afternoon at the Weasley’s, only returning to the flat for dinner because Susan insisted that they had to go through John’s estate paperwork.

Mia would’ve loved to have remained at the Burrow for the remainder of the holiday, but she had seen the shift in Susan begin in the late afternoon, when the company of the Order was no longer distracting her from her grief. She knew very well her mother was putting up a front that she was fine, that she didn’t cry herself to sleep every night for the past couple weeks since John’s death. Diving into a mountain of boring, legal paper work would certainly keep her distracted for the rest of the evening.

Susan and Mia sat at the dining room table while Remus clanked around in the kitchen, cooking dinner for the three of them, the heavenly smell of roasted garlic potatoes wafting through the flat. Mia watched him out of the corner of her eye, studying the premature lines around his eyes and the way his gray hair flopped in his eyes when he leaned over— he needed a haircut, but he was so focused on what he could do for her over the last couple weeks it went by the wayside. She felt a rush of affection for him; he had been so comforting and loving this holiday, as it was the first Christmas without her father, and without Sirius. 

“Alright, we need to go over his assets; He left everything to you according to the attorney I spoke to, so ultimately it’s your decision on what to do with his car and possessions” Susan said, combing through a large stack of papers in front of her.

“Mum, did we really have to do this today?” Mia said, rubbing her face in her hands in frustration. “It’s Christmas”

“This paperwork needs your signature so they can process his life insurance and estate; there is no reason to drag our feet. I’m highlighting all places that need signed, if you sign these now I’ll take care of mailing them for you.” 

Mia let out a groan and grabbed a pen from in front of her; she knew her mother needed this distraction, but she would’ve preferred to not deal with all of this so soon after the funeral. She began signing paper after paper, and by the 34th signature, she felt like she wouldn’t ever be able to write anything besides her name again.

“How much is coming?” she asked, feeling as if she were going cross-eyed from stating at the text in front of her.

“The attorney wouldn’t tell me since I’m not a benefactor, you can call him if you want, or just wait for the check to come in” Susan said

“Ugh, this is all such bullshit…” Mia said under her breath, rubbing her fatigued eyes.

Remus watched the women out of the corner of his eye as he cooked, watching Mia smear her mascara slightly as she rubbed her eyes, the skin around them swollen and pink from frequent bouts of crying over the last few days.

“Alright, dinner is ready” he said, flipping off switches and clanking pans as he took them out of the oven.

He set Mia’s plate in front of her, watching her eye it intently without picking up her fork.

“I gave you the smallest steak, so there should be no problem finishing it”

She rolled her eyes and began cutting up her steak roughly, swearing under her breath. She was so cute when she was irritated; he liked the way her jawline became more pronounced when she gritted her teeth in annoyance. He watched her out of the corner of his eye, admiring her smooth black hair, the scent of her floral perfume drawing him to her; even over the smell of the meal before them. She pushed her hair off her shoulder, revealing the smooth porcelain skin of her neck that looked so delectable, perfect to sink his teeth in…

_Fuck_ his mind swore as his eyes darted to the clock— 4 hours until he could take his potion; the symptoms of the impending full moon the following night were starting earlier than he had anticipated. His desire was ramping up at the most inappropriate time— he wouldn’t be able to stay with her tonight; it was for her own protection. He had resisted biting her in the past, but he didn’t trust himself fully to leave his self-control up to chance. Shame flushed him as he reminded himself that he was a monster, a monster that couldn’t be with her on Christmas because he was too focused on taking a chuck out of her.

“I don’t know how you can eat it like that” Susan said, snapping him back to reality. “I think I can hear it still mooing”

She was staring at his steak, the rare piece of meat just lightly seared on either side, much redder in color than the rest of theirs.

“Don’t knock it ‘til you try it” he laughed “I’m surprised Mia wasn’t craving hers rare, with her injury as large as it is, I expected some contamination at least”

Mia scoffed and turned her nose up, making a disgusted face.

“Mark my words Remus Lupin, I will _never_ eat my steaks rare, that’s fucking disgusting”

* * *

They had spent hours after dinner going over John’s estate paperwork, Mia extremely glad when Susan decided to call it for the night. Her brain felt like it had been overloaded, and she wanted nothing more than to curl up against Remus, under the comfort of blankets warmed by his cozy heating charms.

“I know going through that paperwork was hard for you” Remus said as he closed the bedroom door behind him.

“Yeah, I can’t believe he’s really gone” Mia said sadly “can you unzip me?”

Remus brushed her hair to one shoulder, and then unzipped her to the small of her back, his fingertips lingering for a moment as he imagined ripping her dress the rest of the way off and bending her over the dresser.

“There” he whispered.

“Thanks” she said softly, turning her head to look at him out of the corner of her eye.

He smiled, and then backed away a couple steps, sitting on the edge of the bed; he wanted her, but he couldn’t take her, not tonight. 

“Can I ask you something?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you mad at me?” she asked as she slipped out of her dress “for shagging Eric?”

“I’m not happy about it” he replied plainly, not able to take his eyes of the curves of her rump. 

He wanted to rip those panties down and take her heart shaped ass for himself, her supple cheeks antagonizing him as she stood in her undergarments, staring at her injury in the mirror.

“It only happened once…” Mia said softly, shrugging slightly “I didn’t finish either”

Remus smirked, he was always able to make her finish, and the fact that Eric couldn’t was a win in his book.

“Was there anybody for you? While you were underground— any she-wolves that kept you company?”

He snorted a laugh, grinning slightly “she-wolves” he snickered “no, I didn’t shag any ‘she-wolves’”

“What about non-werewolves?”

She slipped her bra off and pulled on a white tank top, turning back to him as she leaned against the dresser.

“No, there was no one else” he said softly, eyeing her nipples’ slight visibility through her white tank top, imagining taking them in his mouth, imagining her whimper softly as his hands moved over her curves.

There had been opportunity within the pack, a few female werewolves that paid him a little extra attention, offering things that he had been missing in the months that Mia was so depressed he could barely touch her. Sure, they were attractive, but none of them were her. None could compare to the cheeky raven-haired beauty that stood before him— to have bed one of them would’ve felt like an extreme transgression in his mind.

“Do you think these scars make me ugly?” she asked as she ran her hands along the large, raised scratches along her thighs.

“No” he breathed “you could never be ugly”

There was a pregnant pause between them, Mia clearing her throat slightly before she spoke again.

“Why aren’t you changing?”

“I think I’m going to stay at the cottage tonight—” he said, inhaling deeply “stay there through the cycle, it could use some dusting, since we haven’t been there since this summer”

“I don’t want you to go; it’s Christmas— I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve I brought up Eric…”

“I’m not leaving because I’m upset about him” Remus said, imagining her legs wrapping around him as he took her against the wall. “I can’t stay; I don’t think I can control myself around you”

“You’re worried you’ll bite me?” she asked as she pulled her hair up into a ponytail, smiling slightly at him. “Is that how you’d mark me?”

She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t aroused by him worried about losing control. She wanted his touch, his hands on her body and feeling her in her most intimate places.

“Yes, and I don’t want to do that to you, so I need to go”

“Just don’t bite me, you held off last time” she shrugged.

“Easier said than done” He muttered, scratching the back of his head.

Mia drummed her fingers on the dresser for a moment, biting her lip. “It turns me on to think I can make you lose control” she whispered.

The corners of her mouth turned up as she pulled her tank top over her head. Remus inhaled sharply, looking away. He felt his cock twitch in his pants, his erection growing as she slowly stepped towards him.

“Put that back on” he ordered, breathing heavily and his gaze averted.

She gave him a devilish grin as she straddled his lap, rocking her hips against his. His hands instinctively ran up her hips and cupped her butt, feeling the soft cotton fabric of her panties as she unbuckled his pants— He wanted this. He wanted her. His thumb brushed between her thighs, feeling the soaked cotton as she gasped softly. That gasp— it was music to his ears; he wanted nothing more than for her to gasp his name over and over as he pounded her to climax. He felt her hand wrap around his erection as his hands slid up her back. It felt good— too good, he would lose control— he didn’t trust himself.

“Why don’t you _ever_ listen to me when I tell you no??” he said through gritted teeth

“Stop talking, Remus” she whispered, kissing him softly.

He began to shake as he was fighting the urge to take her, but the velvet feel of her skin and crisp smell of her floral perfume mixing with her arousal made his desire stronger than his conscience was. 

“Goddammit” he growled, his lips crashing against hers with bruising force.

He turned and laid her onto her back, taking one of her nipples in his mouth. His erection was hard as a rock as he heard her gasp again— that gasp he likes oh so much. He placed kisses all down her body and along her scars, making sure that this part of her body that she was now self-conscious of wasn’t lacking attention. His head lingered at her inner thigh, his stubble scratching her as his cheek brushed against the creamy smoothness her skin. Remus felt and fought the urge to bite her in such an intimate location, leaving his mark on her, making her his.

The smell of her arousal was intoxicating, he fought with everything he had to stay in control— he couldn’t get carried away, he couldn’t bite her. He felt a rush of irritation that she didn’t heed his warning, he was almost resentful he had to hold back. He flipped her onto her stomach and smacked her buttcheek hard; her yelp of pain followed by giggles drove him mad, his cock throbbing with need.

“That is for not listening to me when I tell you no” he growled in her ear as he massaged the sting.

He smacked her butt again, the slap echoing in the otherwise quiet room. She yelped again, her legs jumping and toes curling. She fell into a small fit of giggles as he massaged her now red skin.

“And _that_ was for fucking the airman” 

He grabbed her hips, pulling her butt into the air to take her from behind. He yanked her soaked panties down and entered her slowly, stretching and filling her as he felt her tightness wrap around him, his name rolling off her tongue with a soft moan. He ran a hand along her spine until he tangled a hand into her long hair, his other hand gripping her hip tightly as he thrusted into her. The sensation of her was electrifying; the sound of flesh slapping together muffled by her moans of pleasure pushing both of them over the edge. He felt the urge to yank her upright by her hair and sink his teeth into her neck, the desire to mark rolling through him as he listened to her satisfied panting.

“That was amazing” she breathed with a soft giggle.

“You’re amazing” he murmured, kissing the small of her back. 

He pulled out and let her collapse onto her belly, kissing her up and down her spine as he massaged her until he caught himself lingering around her hip bone— He wanted to bite, he needed to bite. The urge was overwhelming; the scent of him in her was like a strong potion enticing him to do something he swore he would never do to her. _Mark her!_ His brain told him, _Make her yours!_ He jumped up, backing away and grabbing his hair in panic.

“I need to get away from you” he said, his voice constricted as he ran into the bathroom.

“Remus, wait!”

He slammed the door shut and locked it, turning the shower on cold. He panted as he tried to regain composure, the urge to open the door and take a chunk out of her too intense.

“Remus?” she said softly, knocking on the door.

“Give me a minute!” he growled, backing away from the door and jumping into the ice cold shower.

The water hit him like a ton of bricks, the icy cold shocking his system and calming him down. He let the water pound over him as he took a few deep breaths, feeling himself regaining control. After a few minutes, he exited the bathroom to find Mia sitting on the bed with a vial of wolfsbane in her hand, now clothed in her pajamas.

“Is it too early to take it?” she asked, outstretching the vial to him.

He grabbed his boxers from the floor, pulling them on as he looked at the clock “I’ve got 2 hours, so I’ll just take it first thing in the morning”.

“Do you still have to leave?”

“No, I think I got it out of my system.” He said as he sat at the edge of the bed “but don’t get me going again”

She chuckled as she shifted herself under the covers, feeling cozy and comfortable

“That was dangerous” he said sternly as he watched her adjust herself to her comfort.

“But _so_ worth it” She said with a sly grin.

He gritted his teeth as the irritation rose in him, watching her seem so nonchalant about not heeding his warnings was beyond frustrating.

“ _Mia_ ” he said sharply.

“What??” she snapped, sitting up quickly.

“You don’t understand how close I was to biting you.” He said through a clenched jaw. His tone was firm, almost angry.

“But you _didn’t_ bite me…” She shrugged.

“This time— I won’t forgive myself if I lose control; I _need_ you to listen to me when I tell you something.”

Mia sighed and began picking her fingernails “I did listen, I just chose to ignore…” she said shrugging and rolling her eyes.

“That’s the problem” He sighed and shook his head, shifting to sit next to her “you—“ he wagged his finger at her “—are difficult”

“I wouldn’t say I’m difficult…” She smirked and chuckled, her fingers interlacing with his “I’m just a woman who gets what she wants”

“If what you want is a chunk taken out of you, that’s what you’ll get.”

“I trust you not to hurt me—”

_“You shouldn’t!_ ” he snapped, making her flinch. “I am a werewolf; a beast, a— a _monster_. The closer I get to the full moon, the more dangerous I become.”

“Don’t call yourself that!” she spat, tears beginning to sting her eyes at his slurs against himself. “that’s not true!”

She took his hand as he took a few deep breaths, leaning his head back against the headboard. There was a silence between them for just a moment as Mia fought the tears threatening to escape, and he pondered over what to say next.

“I only allowed myself to shag someone this close to the moon one time before I met you; she most certainly still has at least some scratches from that night and I will be _damned_ if I leave you with a permanent scar” he said, his tone more calm and even.

His eyes followed the large slashes on her thighs, his stomach twisting at the thought that he might’ve left something similar onto another person. He might not have had his nails filed into claws for the purpose of maiming, but he could vividly remember the night at the Leaky Cauldron, grabbing and clawing at the woman’s body, knowing he at least broke skin in a couple places.

“Did you bite her?” Mia asked softly, moving the blanket over her legs to cover her.

“No— but it took a lot of strength not to, and from that night I said I wouldn’t put myself in that position again. It wasn’t worth it”

“Who was she?”

“It was a one night stand— years ago” he said “both of us had been drinking at the Leaky Cauldron and we ended up in a room upstairs, the night before the full moon”

Mia imagined Remus clawing and scratching at a pretty girl in one of the pub’s hotel rooms, barely hanging on for control. She scratched her head awkwardly, biting her lip.

“Don’t bite your lip” he ordered softly.

“Why?” she asked coyly as her brows knitted together

“You’re too enticing— if you bite that lip again, I will have to leave.”

Mia sighed, she would like nothing more than for Remus to take her again and give her as much pleasure as she had just experienced, but she knew she should heed his warning. She flipped the lamp off next to her crawling deep beneath the covers.

“Alright, alright” she muttered.

They were silent for a couple minutes; Mia lying wide awake staring at the ceiling, the only sound was the soft ambient city noise that they barely noticed anymore.

“Have you seen it done?” she asked suddenly.

“Seen what?”

“Someone being marked”

Remus sighed heavily “yes, there were two werewolves that were marked while I was underground with the pack”

“Why don’t you want to mark me?”

“Go to sleep, Mia” he said sternly

“But why? Why is it such a big deal?”

“Go to sleep!” 

Mia huffed in frustration, rolling onto her side and roughly pulling the comforter over her shoulders.

“I’m biting my lip over here, by the way” she said snottily, after a moment pause.

Remus couldn’t help but chuckle as he rolled his eyes, “you’re a pain in the ass, you know that?”

* * *

The doorbell chimed as Mia was behind the counter, elbow deep in a box of various cheddar cheeses.

“I’ll be with you in just a moment!” she called, trying to sort the cheeses by alphabetical order to make stocking them quicker.

They had a double order of cheese come in, as many of their customers purchased wine and cheese sets for the Christmas holiday as gifts. She was cursing Penelope for taking the cheese shipment day off, sure that ‘my grandmother wants to spend a day together’ was code for ‘I don’t want to stock 100lbs of cheese’. 

“You taking a nap back there?” a familiar voice chirped, making Mia pop her head up above the counter quickly.

“Tonks!” she cried, hustling around the counter to give her friend a hug. “Sorry, I’m up to my elbows in cheese back here”

Tonks was sporting her signature bubblegum pink hair, but it was waist length rather than her typical spiky pixie that she wore so well. Kingsley was with her, dressed in a crisp handsome muggle suit that was pressed to perfection.

“We come bearing good news; Kingsley and I were having lunch and figured we’d stop by to tell you!”

“Yeah?” Mia said, raising her brow.

“I got you the Ministry internship” Kingsley said, his deep, slow voice smooth as melted chocolate.

“ _ohmygod!_ ” Mia squeaked, throwing her arms around him.

He grunted as she squeezed him like a boa constrictor, grinning ear to ear. “It’s not in the Auror Department like I had hoped to get you into, but it’s at least in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement”

“What is it then?” she asked, looking puzzled.

“Wizengamot Administrative Services, as an aide” Kingsley said “hey, don’t look at me like that— this is to get your foot in the door” he added when Mia’s face twisted in disdain.

“You do realize that’s a paper pusher job, right?” She said flatly

“Yes, but you’ve been pushing moldy cheese on rich muggles for three years, you need this on your resume to have your Auror application stand out from the others”

“My NEWT scores don’t help me out?” she laughed, putting a hand on her hip.

“They do, _and_ being Susan’s daughter helped tremendously...” Kingsley chuckled.

“Of course it did” Mia grumbled, rolling her eyes. 

Mia questioned if her whole life people would look at her as Susan’s daughter, rather than just as her.

“Our departments are on the same floor though, we can eat lunch together!” Tonks said, linking her arm with Mia’s.  
Mia sighed heavily “When do I start?”

“Atta girl; you start in February.” Kingsley said, flashing his incredibly white teeth. “You’ll get an owl with the exact date and Ministry employee handbook”

“Even though this job is _probably_ going to be bullshit, I really appreciate you going out on a limb for me, even after… well, everything”

“Mia- I’ve known you a long time, and I know that this year has been a fluke for you. I know you will do well in this position, you have my full support”

“Damn Kingsley, when did you get so mushy?” she giggled, hugging both him and Tonks.

“He’s a big softie when he wants to be” Tonks winked, poking Kingsley in the ribs playfully.

“Hey, do you have any more information from Snape about the Death Eaters maybe coming back? I know mum is protected under a Fidelius charm, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried.”

“Actually yes, its good news for us, for now” Kingsley began “I guess Voldemort was very angry at how the attack on your father played out. Snape said he called it sloppy and an embarrassment to his name.”

“Sloppy?”

“Yeah, Dolohov was given permission to hunt down your dad, but I guess he was supposed to kidnap him and move him to a separate location, not kill him on site and make a spectacle. It’s caused the Ministry to tighten security, which we know his goal is to infiltrate and gain control”

“He wasn’t expecting me to be there” Mia said, picking at her fingernails “He recognized me, when Remus and I started dueling with the others— He said he could kill two birds with one stone”

“That makes sense, he got carried away thinking he’d off both of you” Tonks added

“Well, I guess his sloppiness earned him a good bout of the cruciatis curse from Voldemort himself. Snape said he is forbidden to go after Susan again until he ‘learns from his error’, because he’s made taking the Ministry harder than anticipated”

“Well good! I hope this tightened security keeps him out” Mia sneered.

Kingsley and Tonks exchanged looks before Kingsley spoke again.

“Trust me, if he gains control, that won’t be good for anyone.”

The front doorbell chimed again, Mia tensing up when she saw Eric standing on the front rug of the shop, fixing his wind-whipped flaxen hair.

“Uhm, Hi Eric— I wasn’t expecting you…” Mia said awkwardly as Tonks and Kingsley turned to look at him, Kingsley crossing his arms.

“Can we talk?” Eric asked her, nervously eyeing Kingsley up and down, taking note on how muscular his build was.

“What do you want, airman?” Kingsley drawled, his deep voice making Eric jump slightly.

“Kingsley, its ok” Mia said dismissively, motioning for him and Tonks to give her some privacy.

“We’ll see you later” Tonks said, grabbing Kingsley’s arm and leading him out of the shop.

Mia and Eric stood awkwardly for a moment as Kingsley and Tonks slid past him and exited, turning their heads back to look in the window one last time before they disappeared around the corner.

“What can I do for you?” she sighed

“I wanted to see how your Christmas was?”

“My Christmas was alright, thanks” she said crossing her arms “yours?”

“It was good— quiet”

They were quiet for a moment, the silence uncomfortable.

“You didn’t really come here to ask me about my holiday, did you?”

“No, er—“ Eric sighed and rocked back and forth on his feet “How are you holding up? About your dad”

“Some days are worse than others; I can’t believe it’s almost been a month”

“Yeah no kidding” he said, looking over his shoulder “Listen Mia, I know things got weird at the wake, I’m sorry about that— but if you don’t feel safe with the sugar daddy, I can help you. I don’t know what happened to…”

“ohmygod, Remus isn’t my sugar daddy!” She hissed, interrupting him “and I do feel safe with him, he is good to me.” 

“Then what was that on your leg? It felt like some pretty large scarring, and it wasn’t there that night at the bar.”

“It’s none of your business what is on my legs.”

“It is if you’re being hurt by him!” Eric snapped

Mia glowered at him, frustrated that Eric could think that Remus would hurt her when he witnessed Fenrir slicing through her legs like butter. She remembered the horrified expression on his face before she passed out, and felt a flood of anger that his memory was modified to forget— to forget that her father was murdered by terrible people, instead to have everyone think he died prematurely of a heart attack. 

Eric sighed “I don’t think this guy is who you think he is”

“Then who is he, Eric?” she sneered, placing a hand on her hip “you tell me”

“I’ve been doing some digging, it’s pretty interesting…”

“Digging?”

“Yeah, I’ve looked into him, this ‘Remus Lupin’, and I can’t find any records of him until a year and a half ago, when he obtained an ID. I’ve called the courts, and I’ve dug through birth and employment records; I can’t find a single thing about him before this ID came about.”

“You’ve _investigated_ him?” Mia hissed, anger rising “Who do you think you are?”

“I’m worried about you!” he cried “This guy claims to be in his mid-thirties, looks like he’s pushing fifty, and there’s virtually no record of him. He even has your address as his too, so I can’t even get a previous address to find a paper trail. He could be a serial killer or a rapist assuming a new identity”

Mia felt like she was going to rip Eric’s throat out she was so mad. She felt an electric tingle in her palms as she balled her hands into tight fists, trying to keep control on her anger.

“Eric, I’ve known Remus almost four years. He is who he says he is, despite what you think. He is a good man, a kind man, who is gentle with me. He would never hurt me” she began, fighting to keep her tone even. “I need you to respect that _he_ is my boyfriend, not you, and you will stop looking into him. I want to be friends, Eric, but just friends, and you’re not making this easy”

Eric crossed his arms and looked away, contemplating what to say or do next. “I don’t trust that guy” he grumbled.

“You don’t have to trust him, because _I_ trust him.” 

They stared at each other for a moment in silence, Mia’s eyes burning into Eric’s.

“If you care about me, you will stop looking into him. Promise me?” she said, her tone softer, more gentle.

He shifted his stare at a wine bottle on the far shelf for a moment before nodding stiffly and shoving his hands into his pockets.

“I want you to call me if you ever feel unsafe— if he does anything that scares you. I can protect you”

Mia wanted to laugh, how could a muggle protect her from the likes of Antonin Dolohov or Fenrir Greyback? She simply nodded, knowing full well Eric had no idea the dangers in her life she was vulnerable to was far out of his skill set.

“I’m sure I won’t need to, but I appreciate the offer.” She said, stifling an eye roll. “I need to get back to work”

“Ok, yeah, sure—“ Eric said with a lighter, easier going tone. It was obviously forced. “I’ll just talk to you later” 

He zipped his coat up tighter as he turned and walked back to the door.

“Eric!” she called

He turned to look at her as he was half way outside the shop, a cold breeze flowing through the shop as he held the door ajar.

“Remus is a good man, honestly”

Eric sighed, unclenching and clenching his jaw a couple times before speaking. 

“I wish I could believe that”


	39. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has so many goddamn chapters because I didn't take word count into consideration when organizing chapters in the beginning. I feel like my chapters are either 1200 words or 6000 words, LOL.
> 
> Regardless, thank you so much for reading thus far! I appreciate every kudo and comment so so much. I try to update twice a week so you never have to go too long without the next chapter.

Flashes of light whirled around her as she felt the snap of her forearm, the pain flooding up into her shoulder as he stood over her, his face purple with rage. 

_By the time I’m done with you, you’re going to beg me to kill you!_

His nostrils flared and a vein in his temple pulsed as he looked at her with the upmost revulsion. Fear flooded through her as she felt a hand grab her shoulder.

“Mia”

The hand shook her gently, the out of place voice clear in her ear as Dolohov’s twisted face began to fade.

“Mia!”

Her eyes snapped open, her cheeks wet and her heart pounding. She blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted to the dark bedroom.

“You’re alright— you’re ok” Remus murmured in her ear as he ran a hand through her hair. “It was just a dream…”

“Sorry,” she mumbled, wiping her face then rubbing her aching forearm “was I crying?”

“Yeah— what can I do for you?”

She turned her bedside lamp on and looked over at the clock reading 4:12, sitting up as she debated whether she should try to go back to sleep or just get up. Her first day at the Ministry was today, and she had her alarm set for 5:45 anyway.

“Nothing— I think I’m just going to get up” she said, fearing what she would see if she fell back asleep.

She reached over to her nightstand for her calming draught, dropping a couple drops onto her tongue to ease her nerves. She took a deep breath as she felt her heartbeat slow back to a slow, steady pace.

“I’ll put on some coffee” Remus said through a yawn, stretching his arms over his head.

Mia noticed how tired he looked; shadows under his eyes more pronounced, visible even in the dimly lit bedroom. She wondered if he had been up all night watching her whimper and cry in her sleep, or if the symptoms of the full moon this weekend were starting already.

“You don’t have to get up with me” she said, kissing his cheek “go back to sleep”

“I want to see you off for your first day; I’ll nap while you’re working”

“See me off for my first day as a bullshit paper pusher?” she jeered as she got out of bed, making her way into the bathroom.

“Yes, because you’re going to be the best bullshit paper pusher the Ministry has ever had” He teased.

Mia let out a bark of laughter “Shut up” she called as she turned the shower on, holding her hand under the water to wait for it to heat up.

She stripped down, rubbing her twinging arm as she stepped into the steaming water. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes; thoughts of her potentially boring job swam in her brain as she tried to give herself a positive pep talk. She would be lying if she said she wasn’t a tiny bit nervous for her first day, as she didn’t know what to expect, but would never admit this thought out loud.

As the water turned her skin pink, she wondered what she would tell people, namely muggles, what she did for a living when asked. She always told muggles her mother was a detective, maybe she could say she was an administrative aide for the court system? It wasn’t a complete lie— she was just leaving out the fact that it was the magical government’s court she worked for. Administrative aide yet aspiring detective sounded somewhat decent in her mind, and she wondered if it would sound cooler when the words left her lips.

“Coffee is steeping” Remus’s voice echoed in the bathroom, snapping her attention back to reality. He pulled back the shower curtain and eyed her up and down with a devilish grin “Care if I join you?”

She gave him a wry smile as she rolled her eyes, giggling softly “Get in here— but I’ll be pissed if I don’t finish before we run out of hot water”

* * *

The clock read 7:03 as Tonks apparated into the flat, her face pink from the frigid February air.

“Wotcher! Ready for your first day?” She chirped, smiling brilliantly as she shook off a chill.

Mia, Penelope and Remus were all sitting around the table, Mia looking out of place dressed in her work clothes compared to Penelope’s frizzy bedhead and pajamas. She had her nose buried in the Ministry employee handbook as Penelope and Remus shared leafs of the Daily Prophet. Frankie and Lionel hooted excitedly as Tonks fed the owls a couple treats.

“Ready to push some papers” Mia said false enthusiastically, giving her double thumbs up and standing up from the table. “Let me grab my coat”

“Tonks, do you want to have a girls’ night out this weekend? It’s a full moon on Saturday, so no boys allowed” Penelope asked, winking at Remus.

“Absolutely! Sounds like fun” Tonks said with a toothy grin

“Actually I was going to spend the…” Mia started, Remus’s hand coming up to silence her.

“No she’s not, she’s having a girls night with you two” he interjected “I will be fine, I’ve been doing this once a month for thirty-something years”

Mia kissed his cheek, ruffling his hair. “I know, but It makes me feel better to keep you company. I don’t like that you’re stuck in a cellar for 12 hours all alone”

“Well, too bad— I feel better when your with your friends” he smirked “I’m a man who gets what he wants”

“Shut up” she snorted, rolling her eyes and linking arms with Tonks “Love you, see you tonight— bye Penny”

“Good luck!” Both Penelope and Remus hollered in unison, their words muffled by the unmistakable pop of apparition.

* * *

Mia hadn’t been inside the Ministry of Magic since the night Sirius died, forgetting just how grand the architecture before her was. She and Tonks stood in the atrium, as she drank in the scene around her. The black tiled walls stood many stories above their heads, and a large fountain featuring a witch and wizard cast in gold, with a centaur, a goblin and a house elf looking at them in an adoring fashion. The fountain had many glittering gold, silver and bronze coins littered in the bottom of its basin, a small emerald placard reading _‘all proceeds from the Fountain of Magical Brethren benefit St. Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries’_. She hadn’t ever stopped to admire the underground building before, even as a child when she would come to work with her mother, it never seemed to have quite the impact that it did today.

Her mind wandered to the night Sirius was killed; her and Dumbledore running through the atrium to get to the Department of Mysteries, the flashing lights of spells and the chunks of cement flying around them as it was blasted apart by stray curses, Sirius’s body falling through the ominous archway after Bellatrix Lestrange hit him with a spell right in the chest. She could see it clear as day in her mind’s eye, her best friend floating backwards, disappearing behind the fluttering black curtain— only to not reappear on the other side.

“Mia— come on, I’ve got to show you around before the work day starts” Tonks said, dragging her towards the elevator lifts.

“Sorry, yeah,” she replied, her mind snapping back to reality.

She and Tonks filed into the lift, followed by a few other Ministry employees dressed in dark blue uniform robes.

“They work for Magical Maintenance” Tonks whispered in her ear “They all wear blue”

The lift seemed to move in a couple different directions, stopping at a few floors and exchanging passengers; a few paper airplanes whizzed in and out of the lift with the crowds of people, Mia remembering Susan telling her they had to switch from owls to paper airplanes a few years back— due to the mess of owl droppings.

“How’s everything been going?” Tonks asked quietly “that airman leaving you be?”

“He’s called a few times to check in. He thinks Remus hits me, or something.” Mia said, rolling her eyes “Oh— and that he’s faking his identity” she added with a cynical laugh.

“What?” Tonks said, a little too loudly, as a few Ministry workers looked over their shoulders and scowled at her. “That’s the silliest thing I’ve ever heard. why would he think that?”

“It’s complicated— it’s not completely his fault though. If he remembered what he witnessed the day my dad died, it would all make sense to him” Mia sighed “He had been looking into Remus, background checking him. Couldn’t find anything on him except his ID I made him get to go on base. He got suspicious when there was no other record of him in the muggle world”

“You need to nip that in the bud— what if he starts following him and sees him do magic? Or sees you?”

“I think I put a stop to it, I don’t know—“ They were interrupted by the pleasant disembodied voice stated _‘Level 2, Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Auror Headquarters, and Wizengamot Administrative Services’_

“This is us!” Tonks chirped, taking Mia’s arm and leading her forward. “We’ll talk about this later— this first door is Pius Thicknesse’s office; he is Head of Magical Law Enforcement…”

Mia observed the frosted glass door with the gold embossed lettering reading Thicknesse’s name and title, as Tonks dragged her along.

“This door is Gawain Robards’s office, head of us Aurors…”

“Yeah, I remember mum telling me about him; she was really mad he got the head spot over her. She insisted he paid off Scrimgeour to get the spot” Mia said with a laugh.

“Ohh, I remember that day— it was bad. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Robards look scared before…”

They giggled as Tonks led Mia into a room with a couple dozen cubicles that she recognized as Auror Headquarters. A few heads popped up from the partitions of their desks, craning their necks to look at the two women in the doorway.

“Wotcher everyone! This is Mia, she’s interning as an aide for the Wizengamot, but she wants to be one of us!” Tonks called.

“Hi sweetie!” Susan called, jumping up from her seat and rushing to hug her, distracting Mia from the few monotone hellos she received from the other Aurors. “Oh look at you on your first day, don’t you look nice— that blouse does wonders for your figure…”

“Mum….” Mia grumbled, rolling her eyes and flushing scarlet “please don’t…”

Susan squeezed her tightly, forcing most of the air out of her lungs.

“Can’t a mother wish her daughter luck on her first day of work??” Susan huffed “Tonks is giving you the grand tour, I take it?”

“Yeah, I just figured she’d want to see where her office might be one day” Tonks grinned, winking at Mia.

“Where’s Kingsley?” Mia asked as she scanned the cubicles.

“With the Prime Minister, of course” Susan said “He told me to wish you best of luck on your first day, he was sorry he couldn’t be here to say hello— and to remind you that this will look good on your resume”

Mia smiled weakly; wishing that she could stay here at Auror Headquarters rather than off to what she assumed would be her mundane and boring job.

“Alright, well, I won’t keep you— Have a wonderful day sweetheart.”

Susan bustled back to her desk as Mia and Tonks rounded the corner towards the Wizengamot offices, the halls of the second level paneled with the same black glass tiles as the atrium.

“Your mum seems to be doing well, she’s been really chipper” Tonks said quietly

“It’s an act, my mum is never that chipper” Mia muttered, giving Tonks a slight shrug “her eyes were puffy— probably cried all night”

At the end of the long hall, they reached a set of wood doors with similar frosted glass panes as the other offices, the gold embossing reading _‘Offices for Wizengamot Administrative Services’._

“Delphinus is pretty cut and dry, but she’s alright…” Tonks whispered.

They walked through the double doors of the Wizengamot offices to find the most boring office setting Mia had ever seen; even the plain gray cubicles of the Auror office had more pizzazz than the plain beige room she stood in. There were a few desks positioned around the large room, but all the walls were lined with black file cabinets stacked seven feet high, a library ladder slowly moving around the room as to access the top few drawers. A middle-aged, dark haired, dark skinned woman in burgundy robes strode towards them, her face stoic— not a smile, nor a frown.

“Can I help you, Nymphadora?”

“Aw come on, Delphinus, don’t call me that…” Tonks protested “I brought your fresh meat!”

Mia stifled an eye roll as Tonks gestured to her. She forced a smile and stuck her hand out to shake. “Mia Roswell, it’s a pleasure”

“Ah yes, Susan’s daughter” the woman said, looking Mia up and down and outstretching her hand “Kingsley Shacklebolt talked very highly of you— Delphinus Gamal”

Mia’s smiled turned more genuine at hearing this; she respected Kingsley and his opinion of her, and she felt a small sense of pride that he would speak so well of her. Delphinus shook Mia’s hand, her stately demeanor gave the impression that she was generally calm, but that she irritated easily if someone sneezed the wrong way.

“Alright, I’ve got to get to work. I’m on desk restriction so I have a mound of paperwork to get to—!” Tonks said, clasping a hand on Mia’s shoulder

“Why are you on desk restriction?? What’d you do??” Mia chuckled, her brow rising.

Tonks flushed an unnatural shade of pink, her words stammering slightly. “Oh— it’s nothing really, nothing. I’ll see you after bit— for lunch!”

Mia snickered as she watched Tonks scurry out of the office, assuming she got in trouble for playing a prank on one of the other Aurors. She turned back to look at Delphinus, who looked less than amused with Tonks’s bright personality, yet didn’t necessarily scowl at her either.

“Come here, Mia, I’ll have you get to some sorting” Delphinus walked her over to a desk full of files, stacked at least 50 high in each pile. “You drink coffee?”

“Yes— I love coffee” Mia said, caught off guard by such a casual question.

“Me too, every morning I need you to stop by Calista Calderon’s coffee shop in Diagon Alley and get me a troll-sized latte with 2 pumps of butterscotch, 4 pumps of dark chocolate, 2 sugar cubes and 3 shots of espresso”

“Sure—“

“And make sure they steam it twice, but _absolutely no foam_. Got it?”

“Yea— yes ma’am” Mia tried to recite the ingredient list in her mind to memorize it, but Delphinus continued speaking, distracting her.

“Now, I need you make 14 copies of each, then sort the original files into alphabetical order, and organize them into the proper file cabinets. A is to the left, all the way to Z on this far wall over here” She gestured to different points of the room to show her the proper cabinet order. “I need all of this done by 4:00 today— I trust you know a duplication charm?”

“Yes, I do— I’ll get started right away” Mia said, trying to keep her tone positive.

Delphinus nodded, walking away and retreating into an office that was separated by the same wooden doors with frosted glass panels. The door clicked shut, and Mia stared at the glass pane with gold embossed letters reading _‘Delphinus Gamal, Head of Wizengamot Administrative Services’_ for a moment before turning her attention to the nearly 200 files that were piled over the very large desk.

“Fuck” she whispered under her breath “I’m a goddamn paper pusher”

* * *

“I’m a goddamn paper pusher!” Mia spat, pacing in front of the smooth leather couch in Helen’s office.

“At least it seems relatively easy” Helen offered

“Yeah, more like mind numbing.” She scoffed “Remus keeps telling me that it can’t be that bad, but it’s been three days and I think my boredom is making my brain rot”

Helen let out a bark of laughter “I’ve heard most of the Ministry jobs are pretty boring”

“Not being an Auror, I’m sure” she grumbled. “I also fucked up Delphinus’s coffee order on my second day— there was foam and I got the sugar and chocolate amounts wrong”

“I’m sure it wasn’t a big deal—you’re new, after all” Helen offered with a slight shrug.

“Oh, it was— she was less than pleased with me that day. Told me her day ‘needs to start off right to ensure the courts run smoothly, and her day can’t start off right if she is forced to drink such atrocities’” Mia snorted “I swear— she is a monotone version of my mother”

Helen and Mia both laughed at this. “Well, at least Remus seems to be incredibly supportive. He must be a very positive influence for you”

“He’s great, honestly. Better than great— I can’t believe I ever broke up with him. He’s been _so_ good to me since my father died”

Helen began scribbling on her clipboard, the sound of her quill scratching sounding like mice scratching at walls.

“Why is it that you think you pushed him away?” Helen asked.

“I don’t know, because I’m an idiot?” Mia snapped, sitting back on the couch and crossing her arms.

“You’re not an idiot; you are a very intelligent witch. Grief does terrible things to people. _Think_ ”

Mia sighed, the only thing she hated more than talking about her feelings was thinking about them.

“Because when I looked at him, I was reminded of Sirius, and it was too much.”

“But _why_ was it too much? What’s the matter with remembering your friend?”

“My entire friendship with Sirius was because of Remus; we did so much together, the three of us. He didn’t have many friends left, thanks to that filthy traitor.”

“Are you angry that he got the short end of the stick in life? Spent half of it in prison and then killed at a young age?”

“Doesn’t that make _you_ angry, Helen? It should, even if you didn’t know him. Sirius was a good man— loyal, brave, and funny as hell. He was my best friend. He was family. He didn’t have family that loved him because he didn’t believe in their bullshit pure-blood slytherin pride.” Mia huffed “But we loved him, I loved him.”

“He didn’t deserve to go to prison, or have his life taken so soon— I agree.” Helen began, setting her quill down “But why did anger over that translate to you pushing away the people that you love? Was it to isolate yourself like Sirius experienced for over a decade?”

“No” Mia breathed, balling her fists up “Because looking at the people who reminded me of him made me feel. Of course I loved Remus, Penelope and the Order, but they made me _feel_. I was taught to push my feelings aside, to persevere and be strong. I couldn’t ‘be strong’ when I felt this horrible, painful, grieving feeling that I felt whenever I remembered Sirius.”

Mia stood up from the couch and walked over to the window, looking out onto London traffic.

“When I was a child and I was upset, my mother used to tell me to buck up— wipe my tears and move on. The Byrne women were strong, fierce and formidable— we didn’t let our petty emotions get in the way. It was never a ‘thing’ with her to talk about my feelings, so I just thought I wasn’t supposed to feel”

“What about your father? You couldn’t talk to him when you were upset?” Helen asked gently.

“No” Mia laughed cynically “Thanks to mum’s memory charm, I couldn’t confide in my dad about much. I watched him— well, more so listened— to him be tortured, and I couldn’t talk to him about how scared I felt, or about my nightmares because he had _no idea_ it had happened.” She sighed “I was so scared it would happen again. Mum had sent me to live with him in America, so I couldn’t even talk to her about it— not that she probably would’ve been of any help”

“And you lived with your dad in the States until you were seven?”

“Yeah; Dad thought he and mum used to fight all the time, didn’t get along anymore, etc. I was forbidden to tell him the truth about why they divorced and why he asked for a transfer back to the States. I think she confunded the General to approve the paperwork; She was friends with his wife at the time.” 

“That must’ve been a lot to deal with at such a young age”

“Yeah, I don’t know why she didn’t just memory charm me too. She executed the plan pretty quickly, we were in America maybe a month after the attack, so she might’ve just been sloppy. Mum swears she didn’t, but I think she put a tongue-tying charm on me. Dad would try to ask me about the nightmares, why I was having them, but just couldn’t find the words”

“I see” Helen said as she began to scribble.

“When Dad told Mum he was marrying Miranda— I’ll never forget— she came to visit for a couple weeks when I was 6. He was stationed in Colorado, and when Dad introduced Miranda as his fiancée, Mum pursed her lips, looked her up and down and said ‘Honestly John, I expected more than a bottle-blonde waif’”

Mia let out a bark of laughter, but it was short lived. She slunk back down onto the couch, picking at her fingernails.

“They screamed at each other for over an hour. Miranda and I hid in the other room— she let me lay with my head in her lap as she held a pillow over my ears. She was so good about it, but Mum was devastated; refused to talk about anything to have to do with Miranda for months. I never saw her cry, she put on a show that she was just fine. I remember asking her if she were alright a few days after the fight and she said ‘Byrne women are strong; we don’t let petty emotions get in our way’”

“So it sounds like she taught you that the best way to deal with your emotions was to not feel them” Helen said

“Yeah, I came back to live with her when I was 7 because I kept breaking light bulbs and things with magic when I was angry, and the ‘proper’ way to deal with things was to pretend like they didn’t bother me. I was a Byrne woman, after all”

“So, you pushed away the people who reminded you of Sirius because you didn’t want to feel your feelings? The feeling was so uncomfortable it was easier to push it all away?”

“I guess— you’re the behavioral specialist, you tell me” Mia shrugged.

Helen chuckled, sitting back in her chair, giving Mia a slight nod. “You shared so much with me today, Mia, I appreciate your honesty”

“Yeah, I guess I did” She said, scrunching her nose slightly. “I’ve never shared that much about my parents to someone before”

She didn’t feel uncomfortable with being so honest with Helen today; it actually felt good to get some of these things off her chest.

“You’re making progress. I can also tell you ignoring your feelings are not the best way to deal with them. It’s healthy to feel— even bad feelings”

“My mum should come see you” Mia teased “I honestly think she’s more fucked up than I am”

Helen let out another bark of laughter, smiling at Mia and shaking her head slightly. “Well, our time is up for today. I’m going to give you some homework—“

Mia groaned obnoxiously, nothing good ever came from the word ‘homework’.

“I want you to identify uncomfortable feelings during your day to day happenings, and rather than stifle them down, I want you to think about them. Think about how they make you feel, and even confide in someone about them.”

“Mmm, I don’t know…” she said, biting her lip and crinkling her nose in dissatisfaction.

“I’ll ask you about it next session” Helen smirked

Mia rolled her eyes “fine fine, I’ll try this whole ‘feeling my feelings’ thing.” 

She got up to leave the office, but turned back to Helen who was smiling proudly at her. She chewed her lip slightly as she felt a pang of appreciation for the blonde witch.

“Thanks for listening though, to my— bullshit, or whatever.”

“Of course” Helen said with a slight chortle “I’ll see you next session for more ‘bullshit’— as you like to call it”

* * *

Mia continued the rest of the week at the Ministry copying and sorting files, unsure if she hated Delphinus Gamal, or just simply the job itself. She at least had gotten the coffee order correct the rest of the week— troll sized latte with 2 pumps of butterscotch, 4 pumps of dark chocolate, 2 sugar cubes, 3 shots of espresso, steamed twice with _absolutely no foam_. She had found herself reciting this order while she showered or did the dishes— Remus even swore she was muttering it in her sleep one night. Tonks insisted she was alright once she got to know her better, but Mia wasn’t sure which had more of a personality; Delphinus, or a doorknob.

Despite feeling like she had the most mundane, boring job the Ministry had to offer, when Tonks suggested an impromptu trip to the Leaky Cauldron for a celebratory butterbeer Friday afternoon, Mia couldn’t but accept.

The girls walked through Diagon Alley, arms linked and with shopping bags in tow, enjoying the slightly warmer temperatures that moved across London the later part of this week. Mia sucked down a couple butterbeers as Tonks devoured a few cups of chili at the Leaky Cauldron, and then hit the shops for some retail therapy. The sun was still just peaking over the horizon, giving them another few minutes of daylights.

“Dammit, I forgot I needed to stop by Gringotts!!” Tonks said, looking at her watch. “Do you mind?”

“But Florean Fortescue’s closes in 20 minutes!” Mia protested “I’ve been _dying_ for treacle toffee ice cream all week!”

“My head has been all over the place lately” Tonks sighed, grasping her fire engine red pixie cut and shaking her head “I have to get into my vault, I’ve just spent all my coins and if we’re going out tomorrow—”

“Alright alright; you go get your money or whatever, and I will get the ice cream. Meet me back here?” 

“Thanks— I’ll be quick!” Tonks squeaked, trotting up the large white marble staircase of Gringott’s Wizarding Bank, tripping on the second to last step.

Mia snickered as she heard Tonks swear loudly; _fucking klutz_ she thought as she shook her head. She looked at her watch as she bustled into Florean Fortescue’s Ice Cream parlor, apologizing to Mr. Fortescue for stopping by so close to closing,

“No matter, my dear; what’ll it be?”

She picked up two pints of treacle toffee ice cream, as well as a pint of chocolate and a pint of strawberry. Mr. Fortescue packaged the pints into a Styrofoam box, self-cooling with a handy freezing charm, and sent her on her merry way.

Tonks wasn’t outside Gringotts yet, so Mia strolled up and down the street of Diagon Alley, admiring the beautiful sunset that was now just a faint glow of red, an almost full moon rising in the sky just a touch above the horizon. She felt a pang of guilt that she would be spending a fun evening with her friends while Remus would be locking himself away for the painful transformation for the millionth time. She wished she could take his burden away from him, or at least find some way to make his condition easier. Sure, wolfsbane was an incredible breakthrough for werewolves, but she thought there had to be something better that could be created.

She hoped he would be home at a somewhat decent time this evening; Dumbledore tasked him, Bill and Arthur with patrolling Hogwarts for him so he could run out on ’business’— as Remus had called it. She found it slightly odd that she or Tonks were not called on for patrol, but figured Dumbledore might just have a rotation in place. Remus was always available, thanks (and unfortunately) to him not working, making him Dumbledore’s first choice for almost everything.

She had missed him this week, being gone more than her usual 3-days-a-week she worked at the Clearwater’s wine and cheese shop. She wanted to spend the rest of the night curled up in his arms on the couch with her pint of ice cream, eating straight from the container as they watched muggle cooking shows— a personal favorite of Remus’s.

Just as she was passing the mouth to Knockturn Alley, she felt large hands grasp her shoulders and rip her backwards, around the corner of a brick building and into the shadows.

“Evening, princess” said a deep, raspy voice that made Mia shiver down to her core.

She gasped; she was looking at the sinister grin of Fenrir Greyback as he pinned her to the brick wall with one arm, and held his wand at her throat with the other.

“Don’t scream” he said warningly “Or that friend of yours inside Gringotts will pay”

She drew her wand with a shaking hand, Fenrir laughing in her face. 

“If you were going to use that, you would’ve done it already” he said as he ripped the wand from her grasp, throwing it aside. “There’s something about me that you are frightened of— it makes you freeze up”

Fenrir took a long sniff of her, his stale scent overpowering Mia’s nostrils as she squeezed her eyes shut. He was not wrong; there was something about him that terrified her, which rendered her frozen like a statue.

“I can smell the fear rolling off of you” He grinned menacingly “but there’s nothing to be afraid of— well– tonight, at least. We’re just chatting”

“Have you been watching me?” She asked as her voice shook, avoiding his eyes and feeling an unnatural tingle in her palms.

“Since you and that spiky haired friend of yours have been inside the Leaky Cauldron.” He snickered “Dolohov promised me a bite or two out of you, I’d like to collect. Just wondering, where does Remus spend the cycle? Chances are he leaves your pretty face behind somewhere else—”

He cupped his large, dirty hand on her cheek. Mia turned her head sharply, trying to shake off his touch. 

“—Leaves you unprotected."

He grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. “Look at me,” he hissed, his grip so firm it could bruise. He turned his head slightly as he studied her face. “My— you really are beautiful. I see what Remus likes about you, your scent is intoxicating”

She began to shake, glaring at him and pressing herself against the brick wall behind her to put as much space between them as possible. She locked eyes with him, wishing that if looks could kill, he would drop dead right here in the street. 

“He is probably so terrified of the wolf that he locks himself away hours before moonrise. It would be so easy then—“ he now looked her up and down as the corners of his mouth turned upwards “to mark and turn you without him to get in the way. Then Dolohov and I would both get what we want.”

“Dolohov wants me dead” she said through gritted teeth

“Dolohov wants your mother to suffer” Fenrir corrected “You don’t have to be dead for that— and I can’t think of a better way to get under Remus’s skin than to take what is his—” he leaned in to whisper in her ear “Then you’d get to see what a real werewolf is like”

“ _You disgust me!_ ” She spat angrily

She jumped slightly at the zap she felt against the skin of her palms as Fenrir laughed maniacally. His laugh made the hair on the back of her neck stand up as she pushed herself harder against the brick wall behind her, wishing there was a spell that could make her disappear through walls.

“Oh, Mia— don’t you understand? I enjoy it so much more that way…”

“Mia?? Mia! Where’d you go?” she heard Tonks call out from the steps of Gringotts.

“Don’t answer her” Fenrir hissed pushed his wand harder into her throat and leaned in to whisper in her ear again “Remus can’t protect you from me; he doesn’t even have the balls to mark his territory”

“Mia?”

Tonks’s voice was getting closer; Mia prayed she had her wand out, ready to attack.

“I’ll see you again soon, Princess” he said smoothly, stepping away from her. “Real soon”

He gave her one last sinister grin before disapparating, leaving Mia pressed against the brick wall, shaking as tears began to spill down her cheeks. She was frustrated she didn’t act quickly enough, she should’ve drawn her wand and hexed him the moment she heard his voice. Why did she freeze up? Why does she always freeze? She sunk down onto the cobblestone road and began to sob, the moments of her father’s murder and Fenrir slicing through her thighs flashing in her mind. The reel of memories seemed to play all around her as she wrapped herself into a tight ball and squeezed her eyes shut. Her imagination began to run wild as she imagined being bit, with Fenrir laughing triumphantly at turning her into a creature that Remus would despise. Would he love her still if she were like him? She rubbed at her face with her coat sleeve where his filthy hand had touched her, trying to scrub him off.

“Mia?” Tonks said as she poked her head around the corner “What’re you…”

Tonks’s face twisted with worry when Mia looked up at her with a tear soaked face, sobbing and trembling.

“What happened? Why are you over here??”

Mia tried to speak, but her panic only allowed for broken words unable to understand through her choking sobs.

* * *

Tonks apparated with Mia into the living room of her flat, arms full of shopping bags and ice cream coolers. Mia dropped to the floor the moment her feet hit the ground, her breathing rapid and shallow as she sobbed. Penelope and Remus ran to their sides, them having been pacing in the living room waiting for them.

“What happened?” Remus snapped “Where is her calming draught?”

“Why aren’t you at Hogwarts?” Tonks asked as she threw the bags and coolers aside.

“I left the moment I felt my wrist vibrate!” He hissed, holding his wrist up at her. The smooth, gold band was now still and quiet. “Bill and Arthur had it covered anyway— what happened?”

“ _He’s coming for me!_ ” Mia squeaked through a sob, her voice constricted and high-pitched in panic.

“Who? Who is coming?” Tonks asked urgently.

Mia was hyperventilating, her face feeling of pins and needles from lack of oxygen. Penelope grabbed a spare bottle of calming draught from a kitchen drawer, kneeling in front of her and forcing her mouth open.

“Mia, just relax…” Penelope said as she dropped a few drops onto her tongue.

“Tonks, what happened?” Remus asked again.

“I don’t know; I went into Gringotts and she went to Florean Fortescue’s, and when I came out she was at the mouth of Knockturn Alley having a fit.” Tonks said worriedly.

“Knockturn Alley??” Penelope said incredulously “At sundown?”

“I don’t know—that’s just where I found her”

“Penelope, can you make her some earl grey tea? Tonks, in my traveling cloak there’s a bit of chocolate” Remus asked as he picked her up off the floor and carried her to the couch.

Mia had started to slow her breathing, her sobs reducing to shuttering breaths. He sat her down gently, grabbing a throw blanket and casting a heating charm.

“I know how much you like heated blankets” He whispered with a small smile, wrapping her in the thick, warm comfort of her favorite throw.

Tonks handed her the package of chocolate that she accepted with a shaking hand. She tore the package open and bit off a corner of the square, allowing it to melt in her mouth. 

“There, just breathe— good, that’s it” 

Remus sat on the floor in front of her, instructing her to breathe until she was calm enough to speak.

“What happened?” he asked gently, his voice soft and soothing to her ears.

“Greyback” she whispered. “in Diagon Alley”

“WHAT?!” Penelope cried from the kitchen as Tonks sank into the armchair, dumbfounded

“I didn’t even see him!!” Tonks squeaked.

“He— he’d been watching us. He waited until you were inside the bank to make himself known— told me if I screamed for help _you’d_ pay for it” she gestured to Tonks with a shaking hand.

“What did he want?” Penelope asked as she bustled over with Mia’s steaming cup of tea.

“To talk, according to him. I froze too, I should’ve hexed him the moment I heard his voice, but I fucking froze.”

Remus’s face was drained of all color, his eyes bugged slightly as his mouth was pressed into a tight line.

“What did he want to talk about?” Remus asked slowly as he tried to steady his tone.

“Where you spend the cycle, and where I spend the cycle. He insinuated that he would come for me tomorrow”

Mia began to tremble again as she remembered how pleased he looked when asking where she spends the cycle. She rubbed at her face where he had touched her, wishing to take a shower and scrub her skin raw. Remus clenched and unclenched his jaw a few times before taking a deep breath.

“You girls are not to leave this flat tomorrow. I’ll put up enchantments before I leave, but it has to be a girl’s night in.”

“No no no no no— Remus, please, you can’t leave tomorrow!” Mia said panicked

“I have to; I cannot spend the cycle in a muggle flat building— even with wolfsbane.” He said heavily “The three of you should be fine with some protective wards, but I’ll have someone on standby in case you girls will need anything so you don’t have to leave.”

“I’ll just come with you; we can do girl’s night another night…” Mia started, but Remus held his hand up to silence her.

“I think you are safer here. Honestly.” He said, looking at her with a firm expression. “I’ll be leaving you with a trained Auror”

“Have Kingsley help you with the wards, Remus” Tonks interjected “He’s really good at them”

Remus nodded to her, and then turned back to Mia. “Just as a precaution, you aren’t leaving the flat until after the full moon sets.”

Mia nodded, swallowing hard. She would be lying if she tried to say she wasn’t absolutely terrified of Britain’s most savage werewolf— so terrified she didn’t even have the sense to hex him the moment she heard his voice.

“He wants to turn me” she whispered “he wants to turn me to hurt you”

“I’m not going to let that happen” he said softly, shifting to sit next to her and pulling her towards him. “I will keep you safe”

He felt sick as he held her, hoping he could make good on his promise.


	40. Chapter 40

“Don’t leave me!” 

Mia was in tears as she begged Remus to stay. He was finishing the last of the protective enchantments, ensuring no one unwelcome could get into their flat that night.

“I have to, I can’t stay; my transformation gives off too much magical energy for a muggle apartment building” he said heavily. 

“But headquarters was in a muggle neighborhood, why can’t you put those enchantments up?”

“It would take many more wands than just Remus and I to do that kind of magic” Kingsley said, stepping forward and trying to be reassuring. “You’re now under the Fidelius charm, and with the other wards we designed, we think you guys will be safe in here.”

Remus looked at the clock on the wall “Alright, I’ve got to go, I’ll be back first thing in the morning”

“No!” she pleaded, wrapping her arms around him as tears stained her cheeks “Stay a little longer, _please?_ ”

“I can’t, moonrise is in a half hour; I should’ve been gone already” 

He pulled away, grabbing his travelling cloak off the coat rack.

“ _Just wait one second!_ ” she snapped, nearly hysterical.

She grabbed his forearm, both of them jumping at the zap from her palm against his skin. She looked to her hand and to him a couple times as he stared at her intently, but knew he didn’t have time to ask her what it was they had both just felt. He threw his traveling cloak over his shoulders, her crying ramping back up.

“I’m sorry— I love you” he said as he kissed her forehead.

“No no no— Remus— _please!_ ” she sobbed, clawing at him to hold her

He wouldn’t meet her eyes this time as he pulled away, disapparating quickly. Mia saw the edges of her vision become blurred as she began breathing rapidly. She grabbed her calming draught off the table next to her and dropped a couple drops on her tongue, the effects kicking in almost instantaneous as she slunk over to the couch. 

“Dora stopped by her parents’ house this afternoon; she’ll be here in a minute.” Kingsley said, looking at Mia sympathetically. “The only people who can get through the enchantments are members of the Order, and Penelope.”

He watched as Mia curled herself into a tight ball on the couch, her eyes bloodshot from her tears.

“Hey…” he knelt down in front of her, smiling reassuringly, his crisp white teeth popping against his dark skin. “You are going to be safe, Mia— we made sure of that”

“Ok” she whispered through a sniffle, nodding stiffly.

“I’m just a patronus away” he said, “Anything strange happens, I want to know”

“Thanks, Kingsley” Penelope said.

He nodded to both of them, disapparating with a soft pop. Mia squeezed out a few silent tears before Penelope was thrusting a mug of hot cocoa at her, topped with a full layer of mini marshmallows. 

“We’re going to be alright, let’s try to have some fun”

 

Tonks arrived in a bright fuchsia satin pajama set, her hair matching the vibrant color perfectly. She had two shopping bags in her hand, and a box of pumpkin pasties under the crook of her other arm.

“I bought us matching pajamas!” Tonks exclaimed, bumping into and knocking over one of the dining chairs as she bustled into the flat.

“Tonks you klutz” Penelope giggled, taking the box of pumpkin pasties from her and setting them on the table. 

“Mum needed to stop by Madam Malkin’s so I went with her— here, yours are blue” Tonks said as she handed Penelope her bag. “And Mia, yours are green. They were on sale and I thought they were so cute!”

Mia rose from the couch and walked over to Tonks, who had the shopping bag outstretched in front of her. 

“Thanks Tonks, these look nice” she said, admiring Tonks’s set that she was wearing. 

Tonks grinned furiously, her eyes now catching Mia’s attention. Her irises were the same vibrant shade of fuchsia as her hair and pajamas.

“Oh my god your eyes are so cool” Mia breathed “I want to be a metamorphmagus”

“Yeah, you would— because it’s awesome” Tonks winked, kicking her shoes off. “Now go change— both of you!”

Mia stepped inside her room and changed, attempting to give herself a mental pep talk. _Kingsley and Remus made great wards; you’re going to be ok._ The pajamas were extremely comfortable, the satin feeling cool and slick against her skin. The emerald green hue paired nicely with her pale skin and dark hair, Mia feeling a pang of jealousy that she couldn’t make her hair nor her eyes coordinate with her pajamas like Tonks did. 

A shadow moved across her bedroom, making her jump almost to the ceiling. She heard a tap on the window pane, her body flooding ice cold as she feared Fenrir Greyback had come to collect her. She drew her wand, approaching the bedroom window with her heartbeat in her ears. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as she looked outside the window cautiously.

“Goddamnit Lionel” She said under her breath, feeling immense relief. 

She let the tawny owl back inside. He hooted softly as he landed on his perch by the dresser— she had forgotten she let him out for a night flight, and was thankful owls were immune to the protective enchantments. She gave him a treat and stroked his feathers, taking a few deep breaths before making her way to the kitchen to make herself another cup of hot cocoa.

“Tonks, you want a glass of wine? Hot cocoa? Firewhisky?” Mia asked as she clanked around the kitchen.

“Nah, I’m ok, just water, thanks!” Tonks called from the living room, poking at the VCR in confusion. “Damn muggle contraptions…”

Mia’s hands shook as she filled Tonks’s cup with ice, coming down from the rush of adrenaline. She still feared that at any moment, a fully transformed werewolf would break through the door, sinking his teeth into her. _The wards are strong; you will be fine_ she told herself as she shakily poured water from the pitcher, splashing some of it on the counter. She siphoned the water with her wand, her eye catching a bottle of peppermint schnapps that was pushed up against the backsplash, along with Remus’s scotch, and a few bottles of wine. She looked over her shoulder—Tonks and Penelope were distracted fiddling with the VCR. Her calming draught really only worked for the physical symptoms of anxiety, just a little bit of liquid courage would ease her tension. _You promised yourself no alcohol as a coping mechanism_ she fought with herself, her eyes darting back and forth between the bottle and her cup. _But it might make this night easier._ Grabbing the bottle and looking back over her shoulder, she splashed some of the liquor into her cocoa. _Just for today, then no more. You’d be drinking if you went out tonight anyway._

The girls put on a movie, but about half way through they quit paying attention and ended up turning it off. Mia had begun to relax; the peppermint schnapps indeed working better to ease her paranoia then she had anticipated. She felt a little guilty that she had hidden the liquor from her friends; maybe if she had poured a glass of wine, they wouldn’t’ve even blinked. Penelope was drinking, she could too, right? Or would they consider her drinking tonight, of all nights, a poor way to cope? The girls had gotten to chatting as they snacked on pumpkin pasties and licorice wands, and as Mia got up to get another drink, rather than just pour herself a glass of wine, she made another mug of cocoa— not lacking its secret ingredient.

“So how did you and Kingsley come about?” Penelope asked, yanking a licorice wand apart with her teeth as she spoke.

“Oh, I’d been into him since I was an Auror in training. He was always so handsome and professional— never gave any sign that he was into me. I couldn’t stop thinking about him, so one day I just grew a pair and walked up to him, and asked him out for a butterbeer. To my surprise, he said yes” Tonks giggled, smiling a wide, toothy grin.

“yeah, I figured you two were going to start fucking by the way you made eyes at him at Order meetings” Mia snorted as she trotted back into the living room, steaming mug in tow. “I had bet Sirius 10 galleons you two would be shagging by Christmas; I won, of course”

“Yeah, he walked in on us one day at headquarters!! I was so embarrassed; Kingsley was very irritated that he didn’t knock.” Tonks laughed.

The room went quiet for a minute as everyone thought of Sirius; Penelope’s hand instinctively brushed her other wrist where his watch was fastened, the long sleeve pajama top concealing it from the girls.

“Let’s play a game” Tonks said, breaking the silence. “Truth or dare? Is that what the muggles call it?”

Mia and Penelope snickered and made faces as Tonks rolled her eyes.

“What’s the matter, scared??” she jeered

“Truth or Dare??” Penelope teased, giggling. “How old are we??”

“Oh come on, Penny, it’ll be fun” Tonks said grinning. “I’ll go first. Mia, Truth or Dare?”

“Dare” Mia with an eye roll.

“I dare you, to send a patronus to Kingsley, asking him to come here, and then get him to go get us a pizza!” Tonks said, giggling furiously.

“Oh he’ll be _so_ irritated that we called him for just a pizza!” Mia said chuckling.

“Hey, they said not to leave the flat— do they expect us to starve??” Tonks teased as she shoved a pumpkin pastie in her mouth, whole.

“Is that why you wanted to play— to get a pizza?” Penelope jeered, taking a sip of her wine.

“Maybe” she laughed “now, Mia, you have to do your dare”

“Fine” Mia groaned playfully, and cast her silver wolf. 

The patronus went running through the wall and disappeared, Penelope eyeing it with admiration.

“Can you teach me to do that?” she asked sheepishly

“Of course” Mia winked.

It was only a moment later when Kingsley popped into the middle of the living room, concern plastered across his face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his face turning into more of a scowl when seeing the three girls relaxing on the floor in their pajamas.

“We need you to get us a pizza” Mia said, trying to keep a straight face. “Please”

“You need… a _pizza_?” Kingsley asked, his eyes narrowing. “You couldn’t’ve just said that in your message?”

The three girls couldn’t contain their laughter and broke into a fit of giggles, making Kingsley huff in irritation.

“Please, my love, I’m hungry” Tonks said, brushing her hand across her stomach

“Fine” he said through gritted teeth.

“Just cheese— Thin crust, extra sauce— Make sure they...”

“Make sure they don’t burn it, I know,” He said, scratching his smooth, bald head. “I’ll be back in a minute— seriously Dora, if you wanted a pizza, you should’ve just said so. I was worried”

He gave her a disapproving look and disapparated. The girls laughed again, taking sips of their cups and cracking jokes about Kingsley.

“Ok, my turn. Tonks, truth or dare?” Mia asked, her eyebrows raising.

“Truth!” 

“Why does Kingsley call you Dora?” 

“It’s what my parents call me” she said simply, shrugging her shoulders. “He wanted something different to call me besides my surname if we were going to date”

“Mia, Truth or dare!” Penelope said, swaying slightly from her few glasses of wine.

“Truth”

“Best sex you’ve ever had— who was it with?”

“Ohmygod Penny!” Mia cried, crinkling her nose. “Remus— He’s the only one who has gotten me to finish”

“Shut up!” Penelope laughed “What about Brogan Murphy in 5th year? You spent every Thursday after Potions in one of the broom closets with him for what— nearly 3 months?”

“His middle name might as well have been jack-hammer— he was always so selfish” Mia sighed, the corners of her mouth turned up slightly. “I’m telling you guys, there is a reason I was willing to risk everything to keep shagging my teacher— he was _so_ worth it”

The girls giggled furiously as Mia air-mimed an approximate measurement.

“He does this thing with his fingers…” Mia had begun to say, trying to show them with her hand as Kingsley popped back into the living room, pizza in tow.

“Do _not_ finish that sentence until I am gone” he said flatly, his face twisting in embarrassment as he handed Tonks the pizza and turned to leave. “Now, is there _anything else_ I can get you girls to avoid a patronus in ten minutes?” he asked, a note of irritation in his voice.

“No, my love, thank you” Tonks said sweetly.

His pop of disapparation was followed by another furious fit of giggles. The girls dug into the pizza, burning their mouths on the piping hot cheese. Mia relished in the flavors melding together in her mouth— she was thankful that despite her constant anxiety, her appetite seemed to be back to normal.

“Penelope, truth or dare” Tonks said, a mouthful of pizza.

“Dare!” Penelope cried, louder than normal due to her being on her 5th glass of wine.

“I dare you…” Tonks began, but paused to laugh for a moment. “To call that wanker airman, Eric, and ask him out.”

“WHAT??” Penelope and Mia both cried, laughing so hard their ribs hurt.

“But he has the hots for Mia!” Penelope snorted. “She fucked him in a bathroom!”

“Could we not bring that up??” Mia groaned, blushing.

“That’s why it’ll be funny!” Tonks said. She grinned at Penelope mischievously “…unless you’re a _chicken_ ”

Penelope scoffed and stood up, adjusting her blue pajama top as her nose upturned. She began walking to the phone pompously, swaying as she stepped. 

“Penny, you don’t have to!” Mia cried, laughing. “Seriously Pen— _Penelope Elizabeth Clearwater!_ — put down the phone!!”

“Oh no— I don’t want Tonks to think I’m a chicken!” Penelope called over her shoulder, dialing on the number pad. “Hi, can I speak with Eric Richardson, please?”

Mia and Tonks were cackling furiously, Penelope’s voice nearly inaudible as she turned her back to them as she spoke. 

“Nymphadora Tonks, you are _evil_ ” Mia snorted

“Don’t call me that!” she snickered, throwing a napkin at her. “Maybe it’ll get him off your back and onto hers— it’s been a while since she’s been on a date”

“He’s not going to say yes, you’re only embarrassing her!”

“Great, Friday night works perfect.” they heard Penelope say, making them crane their necks to see her in the kitchen. “7:00 at the bistro on 7th. It’s a date.”

She hung the phone up and sauntered back over to them, plopping down in her spot where she was before. 

“Friday night?” Mia asked incredulously.

“Yes. He said yes, and is taking me to dinner” Penelope said smugly, picking up another piece of pizza.

“No shit!” Tonks cried, smacking Mia playfully on the arm as she gave her a surprised smile.

Penelope turned her nose up at Tonks. “You’re lucky he’s handsome, otherwise my Friday would suck worse. He seems to have the emotional capacity of a teaspoon.”

“Oh, and Percy Weasley was better?” Mia jeered.

More giggle fits erupted from them, Penelope waving her hands to try to quiet them.

“Hey, I was 17 and he was my first serious boyfriend…” she started, throwing a throw pillow from the couch at Mia. “Percy was a good conversationalist though!”

“Yeah, when he was talking about being Head Boy” Mia said cynically.

“Shut up!” Penelope giggled, her words slurring slightly.

“Could Percy make you finish?” Mia taunted, raising one brow.

“SHUT UP!” Penelope howled, more giggles erupting from her as she flushed scarlet.

“Maybe Eric can…” Mia teased with a shrug.

“Stop, you’re terrible!! I’m not going to shag him— the only reason I am stuck going to dinner is because Tonks is a sadist!” Penelope cried, chucking a throw pillow at Mia. Tonks cackled as she bit into another bite of pizza, her inner prankster satisfied at making Penelope squirm. Mia shielded her face, the pillow bouncing off her arms and into the middle of the pizza.

“Well, pretty sure it’s been a while since you’ve had some cock…” she said as she waved her wand over the pillow to clean the sauce and cheese that stuck to it. “It’s decent, I promise”

“Stop!!” Penelope shrieked with laughter, her face turning almost purple she was blushing so much.

The girls all laughed so hard their ribs were hurting. They held their sides as they fought to regain control of their breathing.

p>“Alright alright alright” Mia said, stifling the last of her chuckles with a deep breath “Truth or dare, _Nymphadora_ ”

She enunciated Nymphadora slowly, for which Tonks rolled her eyes at.

“Dare, bitch, let’s see what you got”

“Ok, I’ve got a bottle of firewhisky in the cabinet. You have to do 8 shots in a row, and if you puke, you have to start over!” Mia cried, cackling maniacally.

“I can’t do that” Tonks said simply.

“You have to, it’s your dare!” Penelope cried, poking her shoulder “If I had to ask out airman douchebag, then you have to start shooting”

“No, I really can’t do it” She said, smiling broadly.

“What’s the matter Tonks; can dish it but can’t take it?” Mia jeered.

“I can’t do it, because I’m pregnant.”

“WHAT!?” Penelope and Mia both shouted.

“Does Kingsley know??” Penelope asked as her mouth hung open in surprise.

“Of course, why do you think he was so nice about getting us pizza? I’ve told him the baby has been craving pizza lately. Unsure if that’s true or just me, but it works.” Tonks shrugged.

“How far along are you?” Mia asked, eyeing her furiously.

“Pretty far, I’m due in April.” She said grinning.

“Wait…” Penelope’s brow furrowed.

Tonks giggled, and before their eyes, a baby bump appeared, as if it had always been there.

“What the— how did you hide that?” Mia asked, her eyes bugging in disbelief.

“I’m a metamorphmagus, duh” Tonks rolled her eyes, chuckling.

“That’s why you didn’t drink when we were at Top Hats….” Penelope said under her breath, putting the pieces together. 

“Why didn’t you tell me when you found out?” Mia asked incredulously

Tonks shrugged “you were kind of being an asshole at the time”

Mia felt a familiar rush of shame; she indeed, had been a terrible friend at the time. So terrible, one of her best friends didn’t tell her she was pregnant. The mood in the room went from lighthearted and fun to heavy, the air weighed down with past baggage and guilt. Mia looked to her mug of cocoa, her hidden booze making her think maybe she still was an asshole.

“Tonks… I’m sorry…” she said slowly, her brow furrowing.

“It’s alright; Kingsley also wanted to wait to tell people anyway. It came as a nasty shock to him when I told him— it’s not like this was planned”

Mia nodded, but didn’t look reassured.

“Really, Mia, its ok— don’t beat yourself up.” Tonks said, taking her hand and squeezing it. “It’s a boy, by the way”

“Wow, well, congrats” Penelope said

“I’m such a shitty friend” Mia said quietly, taking a sip of her spiked cocoa, letting the peppermint burn her throat.

“You’re not a shitty friend” Tonks said, looking at her reassuringly.

“I’ve been hiding schnapps in my cocoa all night” she said flatly, unsure if it was the peppermint schnapps itself or the guilt that made her confess.

Penelope yanked the mug from Mia’s hand and sniffed, her nose crinkling from the strong scent of alcohol.

“Damn— how much did you put in here?” she breathed as she handed the cup back to Mia “Why did you feel like you had to hide that? If you wanted a glass of wine, you could’ve had one”

“I thought if I had a glass of wine you’d take it from me, since I was stressed about Greyback” Mia said quietly

“So you decided to secretly use alcohol as a coping mechanism like we’ve agreed not to _how many times_ now?” Penelope sneered.

Mia’s shoulders hunched forward as she felt shameful— shameful for spiking her drink, shameful for hiding it. Tonks held a hand up to silence Penelope, who was ready to go off on a tangent.

“Its girl’s night, Mia, we wouldn’t’ve thought twice if you had a drink—“ Tonks started.

“But you hiding it is concerning” Penelope finished for her.

“I shouldn’t’ve hid it, I’m sorry” Mia said, tucking her legs to her chest and resting her chin on her kneecaps. 

“If you want a drink, just be honest. And if you’re feeling stressed like you need a drink, talk to us instead— talk to us about how you’re feeling”

“Penny, when have I _ever_ been good at talking about my feelings?” Mia scoffed.

“Never, but that’s the problem— plus, didn’t your counselor encourage you to talk about how you feel more?”

“Maybe” she grumbled sheepishly, rolling her eyes.

“Don’t turn into Remus, who drowns himself in a bottle of scotch when he’s feeling blue— I’m surprised he’s not a full blown alcoholic by now”

“He’s not that bad…” Mia protested.

“How many bottles of scotch were there at his cottage when we found him?” Penelope said, her brow raising “50? 70?”

“Seriously?” Tonks said in disbelief.

“Yeah, he had broken up with Mia maybe 8 months before, and I’m pretty sure he sat in the same armchair the whole time and just drank. It was bad— his place was a wreck” Penelope said to Tonks, making Mia roll her eyes. “Don’t you roll your eyes, you _know_ it was bad— Remus is an extremely clean roommate and his place was piled with trash when we found him.”

“That was nearly two years ago, he hasn’t done that since” Mia said irritably.

“Not to that extent, but I still see a glass of scotch in his hand every time he’s feeling even remotely upset. He drank a lot right after Sirius died, while you were locked in your bedroom” Penelope said “Alcohol isn’t a coping mechanism— just promise me you will try other things to cope before you start boozing your drinks— and if you want a glass of something, just don’t hide it”

“I’m sorry” Mia whispered, feeling a sure of guilt. 

She knew she should’ve just poured herself a glass of wine, no good could come of trying to hide from her friends. Tonks gave her a sympathetic smile, grabbing her hand and placing it to her stomach.

“Let’s lighten the mood” She said softly “Here, want to feel him kick?”

Mia felt a small punch on her palm as her hand was pressed to Tonks’s belly. She smiled broadly, giggling softly.

“Hey buddy” she whispered to Tonks’s stomach “I can’t wait to meet you”

“I want to feel!” Penelope exclaimed, reaching her hand over.

The girls laughed as they held their hands to Tonks’s baby bump, feeling the little fetus kick and punch their hands.

“Is this why you’re on desk duty at work??” Mia asked suddenly, connecting the dots in her mind. “I thought it was because you kept putting dungbombs in Dawlish’s desk”

“Yes, it’s for this little guy’s safety” she said, patting her stomach. “However, I do put a dungbomb in both Dawlish and Williamson’s desks every Thursday; they put enchantments on it to try to keep me out, but I always break them in the end”

The girls laughed as Tonks described the lengths that she had to go to break into her co-workers desks just to prank them, her face beaming with pride and mischief. 

“Well, I guess it’s my turn, Penny, truth or dare?” she added to the end of her dungbomb rant.

“Oh, no no no…” Mia laughed, splashing her boozy cocoa slightly as she readjusted her seated position “You couldn’t do my dare so I have to give you another one”

“Alright, what’ll you have me do? —that doesn’t injure my unborn child of course”

Mia bust out into giggles, grinning wickedly. “You have to send a patronus to Kingsley, and ask him to get us cheesecake”

The girls busted out into more laughter, knowing that by the end of it, Kingsley was going to hate his evening.

* * *

Remus had a particularly tough transformation this cycle, feeling much more ill and sore than he usually did the morning after the full moon. He attributed this to extra stress on leaving Mia for the evening, despite knowing his and Kingsley’s enchantments were top notch. Arthur had let him stay in the Weasley’s cellar for the night, offering him to stay for most of the day and recover at the Burrow. Arthur found Remus in the morning looking rather sickly; he hesitated when Remus asked him to side along apparate him back to Mia’s flat before it was most likely safe for him to do so. 

Arthur and Remus appeared in the living room of the girl’s flat with a soft pop, Remus stumbling when his feet hit solid ground. 

“Where are they?” Arthur asked, looking around at the mess of the pizza box, cheesecake to-go containers and blankets strewn about the living room. 

Remus poked his head through the door way of their bedroom to see Penelope, Tonks and Mia all piled into one bed, sleeping soundly. He smiled at how peaceful she looked; he hoped that she had gotten a decent night sleep despite her nerves.

“They’re still sleeping; looks like they had a good time last night” Remus said, hobbling to the couch and laying down slowly.

“What can I get you?” Arthur asked, helping Remus steady himself on the couch.

“Ah, nothing Arthur— I’ll be fine, thanks” he said, waving a hand to dismiss him. “I’ve been doing this for a long time now. I can’t thank you and Molly enough for everything you done for us, though. Thank you.”

“Nothing of it” Arthur said with a warm smile. “Send word if you need anything”

Arthur disapparated, leaving Remus in the very quiet flat. He closed his eyes, only to rest them for a moment, but drifted off to sleep.

 

“Remus, you look like shit.” A voice said, waking him from his deep sleep. He blinked a few times and rubbed his eyes, seeing Tonks come into view. Her vibrant fuchsia hair and pajamas were a little too bright of a color for his eyes to handle this soon from waking up, making him squint sleepily at her.

“Where’s Mia?” he asked, his voice hoarse from his mouth and throat feeling extra dry.

“Sleeping; we didn’t expect you to be back this early or she probably would’ve wanted to be awake already.” 

“Did she have any nightmares last night?” he asked, trying to sit up slightly.

“No, none that I know of; pretty sure she’s been out cold since midnight. Must’ve been the schnapps” Tonks shrugged, walking in to the kitchen and clanking around for coffee mugs. “She spiked her hot cocoa most of the night— tried to hide it” 

Remus sighed heavily, rubbing his face. “I’ll talk to her”

“We already did— you should drink some coffee though, really, you look like you could use it”

“Alright, is there a pain potion in the pantry also?” he asked “if so, please bring me one”

Once Remus got a good look at Tonks, his eyes widened at the sight of her stomach.

“Uh— are you… _pregnant_??”

“Yeah, I’m having a boy in April— Surprise!!” she threw her hands up playfully, her face beaming.

“How have you kept that hidden??” 

Tonks rolled her eyes “you all forget— I’m a metamorphmagus”

“Shit— well, congrats” he said, trying to wrap his head around the news.

Tonks clanked around some more, knocking over her cup of coffee and swearing loudly. Remus put a hand to his face and chuckled; Poor Tonks was a bull in a china cabinet. Her loud cursing woke Penelope and Mia up, both of them slinking out of the bedroom yawning and rubbing their eyes. Mia caught the sight of Remus out of the corner of her eye and did a double take,

“Remus!” she cried, scurrying over to him on the couch and throwing her arms around him.

He let out a grunt as she hugged him, her embrace a little painful this morning.

“Sorry” she giggled, running her hand through his hair and looking at him “you look like shit”

“Thanks” he muttered cynically, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly.

Tonks came bustling over with a cup of coffee and a pain potion for him, which Mia took from her and set them down on the coffee table. She helped him sit up, then handed him his pain potion with a warm smile. He gulped it down greedily, chasing it with a swig of coffee after she handed him his cup.

“How was last night?” he asked as he swallowed.

“Great, we had a good time” she said smiling. “Although, I think Kingsley hates us…”

Tonks, Penelope and she exchanged giggles as Penelope began picking up the trash they had left strewn about. The girls cleaned the flat for a few minutes until Tonks insisted she had to get home, and Penelope retreated to her room to shower. Mia snuggled up on the couch next to Remus— His clothes had a slight musty smell to them from spending the night in the Weasley’s cellar, but she didn’t mind. She was just glad to have him home.

“So Tonks is pregnant” 

“Yeah, I saw” Remus chuckled “Bet Kingsley got a bit of a shock when he found out”

“Yeah, no kidding” she said, fidgeting with a button on his shirt during a pause in their conversation.

“So what was that last night?” he asked, Mia able to feel his voice reverberate in his chest as he spoke. “When you grabbed me?”

“I don’t know” she said “it’s been happening a lot, when I get upset or scared. I shouldn’t be losing control; I’m way too old for that”

“Expressing your pent up energy with a magical response maybe…?” he pondered.

“I don’t know, honestly” she repeated. “Question— did you blast Fenrir off of me? The day my dad died?””

“No” he said as he shifted slightly “I saw him get blasted back, but I didn’t see who did it”

“There was a wall behind us, and he flew backwards, rather than to the side. Do you think I could’ve done that?”

“Wandless? That’s highly doubtful. Transfiguring your wand into a hairpin is one thing, but dueling spells are a whole different animal.”

“It just doesn’t make sense”

“You also were injured, so you might be remembering it different than what happened…” he began

“I know what I saw!” she snapped

“Ok, ok.” He said quickly “you could always get a book from the library on wandless magic, see if there is any information on why you are experiencing what you are?”

She pursed her lips curiously and pondered this for a moment; that was a good idea he had given her. Why hadn’t she thought to hit the library before?

“Maybe I’ll stop by one day this week, after work” She shrugged.

“Take Tonks, I don’t want you going alone.” Remus said firmly

“So what, am I just going to have to live in constant fear that that psycho is coming for me?” she said irritably.

"No— just, please— take Tonks with you if are going after work one day, just in case” Remus said, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear “You said he waited until you were alone to make himself known, if he is following you, he won’t approach you if she is with you.”

Mia sighed heavily. “Alright, I’ll bring her with me; I promise I won’t go alone.”

“Good girl” he said, giving her a slight squeeze “If only it were that easy to get you to listen to me every time I make a suggestion”

“Shut up” she laughed, smacking his chest playfully and rolled her eyes.

He tickled her, laughing as she squealed for mercy. When he let up, she nuzzled her head into his chest and traced circles along his collarbone, feeling comforted by his arm around her, holding her to him.

“Why did you hide your drinking last night?”

“Which one said something?” she snapped, popping her head up to look at him.

“It doesn’t matter— why did you hide it?”

“What do you want me to say, Remus? Yes I spiked my cocoa, I shouldn’t’ve hid it but I did. I hid it because I thought if I had a glass of wine they’d take it from me, and I felt like I needed a drink. I fessed up and Penelope already ripped me for it”

He sighed heavily “Just don’t be like me, scotch has been my crutch for many years” 

Mia nodded and they fell silent. She had always pushed her feelings aside in fear of looking weak (Byrne women were strong, as Susan pounded into her head) but with Remus she knew she could be vulnerable. He wouldn’t look down on her for being afraid or being weak.

“Promise me you won’t try to hide this anymore?” Remus said, breaking the silence.

“mhmm” Mia hummed.

_"Promise me_ , Mia.” He said insistently

“alright alright” she grumbled. “I promise”

He traced circled on her back as they lay there silent again, Mia half hanging off the couch, as it was not quite big enough for the two of them.

“He scares me— Greyback, I mean” she said softly after a minute. “I don’t know why I am so afraid of him, but honestly, he scares me more than Dolohov does”

“He will feed on that— the more afraid of him you are, the more power he has over you”

“I don’t want him to have power over me” Mia whispered.

Remus gave her a soft squeeze as he kissed her forehead.

“Then don’t give it to him— don’t let him see your fear.”


	41. chapter 41

Mia and Tonks stood in front of the Wizarding Library of London in Diagon Alley and admired its architecture. It was an exquisite pink marble building with pillars, two gold lions perched on either side of the front staircase, and had neatly trimmed bushes surrounding the entire building, for which Mia assumed a team of house elves worked around the clock to keep the landscaping in tip top shape. The gold lions sat still on their perches, moving their heads to watch patrons walking up and down the library’s staircase.

Mia took Tonks’s hand as they trotted (Tonks more so waddled) up the staircase to a set of large oak doors, feeling thankful that she had agreed to come with her to the library when they got off work. She felt much safer than she thought she would with Tonks by her side, but she still found herself looking over her shoulder as they had walked the cobblestone roads. Could a pregnant woman really help defend her if need be? She felt a twinge of pain in her arm as she opened the heavy door, it still bothering her from where Dolohov had fractured it. She had been wondering if the Healers at St. Mungo’s had made a mistake while repairing it— maybe a trainee Healer who wasn’t thorough.

“Blimey, look at all these books!” Tonks exclaimed as they stepped inside the library.

Pink marble floors stretched to the back of the library as rows and rows of bookshelves seemed to continue on for miles. The bookshelves were stacked 2 stories high, and oak bookshelf ladders moving by themselves periodically just like the Hogwarts staircases did. Mia wasn’t sure where to begin, so she drug Tonks along to a large desk in the middle of the library. A near-ancient witch wearing thin rectangular spectacles sat behind the sprawling oak counter, scribbling onto a thick notebook. Her gray hair was pulled tightly into a bun, her hairs pulling so tight it gave the witch an unattractive facelift. 

“Can I help you?” the librarian said, her voice monotone and bored.

“Hi, I’m looking for your section on wandless magic” Mia said politely.

The librarian looked up from her parchment and peered over her rectangle spectacles, eyeing Mia up and down before glowering at Tonks’s vibrant orange hair.

“Bookshelf 53, section D.” she said, returning back to her parchment.

“Thank you!” Mia softly, and hustled to the shelves behind her.

“Mia!” Tonks whispered, a mischievous smile sweeping across her face “I’ve got a fanged frisbee in my bag…”

“No!” Mia hissed, giggling “I remember hearing about your love for pranking Madam Pince, but I really _really_ need these books— don’t get me kicked out”

Section D of bookshelf 53 was thankfully near the ground, making access to the books easy. Mia began pulling book after book and stacking them on the floor, pulling anything that looked relevant. She found herself with a stack of ten books, ranging in thickness from an inch to at least six.

“Locomotor” Mia said, pointing her wand at the tower of books.

“How many are you getting??” Tonks asked, crinkling her nose

"Seeing as how Remus doesn’t want me venturing places alone for a bit, I figured I should get as many as I can so we don’t have to keep coming back”

The stack followed them as they made her way to the librarian’s desk to check out. Mia’s eye caught a sign to her right on one of the bookshelves, reading _‘Bookshelf 35, Advanced charms including but not limited to: Protean, Patronus, Protego._

She slipped into the row, the word _patronus_ piquing her interest. Everyone always commented how curious it was that she and Remus shared the same corporeal patronus, but something always distracted her when she tried to ask why this was. Was it not common to have the same patronus as someone close?

“Oi, what’re you getting now??” Tonks said, a little too loudly, receiving shushes from the stern librarian.

Mia scanned the shelf, coming upon a book titled Corporeal Patronuses: a look at guides and their purpose. Mia shrugged and pursed her lips, pulling the book from its place on the shelf and placing it at the top of the stack. 

“I’m done, I promise” She chuckled to Tonks.

She trotted back to the librarian’s desk as her stack of books followed her like an obedient dog walking next to its owner. The librarian peered at Mia’s stack with curiosity and annoyance.

“You want to check out _all_ of these?” She said with a slight sneer.

Mia fought an eye roll as she guided the tall stack to settle itself on the librarian’s desk. Tonks, who was a few shelves behind her still, kicked one of the library table chairs accidentally. She swore loudly, making the librarian glare even more intensely at her.

“Sorry!” Tonks whisper-yelled, holding a hand up apologetically.

Mia couldn’t help but laugh and shake her head at her. The librarian looked back to Mia and drummed her fingers on the desk in annoyance.

“Yes ma’am, sorry— all of them, please.”

* * *

As the weekend rolled in, everyone’s evenings seemed much more exciting than Mia’s. Penelope was off with Eric for her truth or dare date (and not thrilled about it due to her facial expression leaving the flat), and Remus was off patrolling Hogwarts for Dumbledore again, irritating Mia to her wit’s end that she wasn’t called upon as well. She had offered to join him, but he insisted she stay home, that Susan wanted to spend some quality time with her. There wasn’t anything wrong with spending time with her mother, but she found it strange that she and her mother cooped themselves up in her flat (going through her library books), rather than go shopping or to the theater like Mia had suggested. One little incident in Diagon Alley, and she felt that Remus was hiring babysitters for her.

She was irritated that since her father died— hell, since Sirius died, she hadn’t been trusted to do any tasks for the Order. She understood how Sirius felt, trapped inside 12 Grimmauld place and feeling utterly worthless. She knew Remus was trying to keep her safe, but she wanted to be useful.

She felt like she was being treated like a fragile piece of glass, ready to break at any moment if handled incorrectly. She wanted more to focus on than just her mind-numbing internship at the Ministry and her part time gig at the Clearwater’s wine and cheese shop. She needed the excitement that the Order of the Phoenix gave her, the thrill of being on the right side of the war, the pride it gave her to say she fought alongside the great Albus Dumbledore in the fight against Voldemort.

The vodka in her earl grey made her question if she was— indeed— fragile. She found comfort in the bottom of a liquor bottle rather than share her feelings openly. She found herself slipping more and more shots of hard liquor into her coffee, tea and hot cocoa— albeit promising she wouldn’t keep doing it, let alone hiding it as she did. Remus had gotten angry with her when he caught her sneaking rum into her tea the previous night, trying to inconspicuously splash a bit into her mug.

 _“What the hell are you doing?”_ he had growled in her ear, grasping her wrist tightly to prevent her from pouring. _“I’m over a foot taller than you, I can see right over your head— you promised me you wouldn’t hide this anymore”_

She had felt ashamed. Ashamed for one, that she promised she wouldn’t hide it but did anyway, and two, because she felt like she needed a drink just to get her through her evenings. His bruising grip on her wrist might as well have been a slap in the face; her promise she’d made in St. Mungo’s that she would be better was broken by a simple, stupid lie. Everyone had told her if she would like a drink, fine, but don’t hide it. So why did she still feel the need to sneak?

She thought back to this time one year previous; life seemed to have made sense back then. Her father was finally living in the same country as her after years of being apart. Nights under the invisibility cloak with Tonks, snacking on pumpkin pasties and hearing her Auror stories whilst guarding the Department of Mysteries had given her drive and ambition to follow her dream career. She had Sirius; her best friend, someone she considered more as family than simply friends. She felt a sense of belonging, serving alongside Remus and the others, being a trusted member of the resistance.

Now, everything was different. Her father was dead. Sirius was dead. Both murdered by Death Eaters that laughed as they watched the light leave both of their eyes. She had blown off applying for her dream career in the thwarts of her depression, leaving her to be Delphinus Gamal’s errand girl and paper pusher rather than an Auror in training, learning skills on how to take down dark wizards. She also didn’t feel like a trusted member of the resistance anymore, just a sad girl with a dead friend and a dead father. She was certain Remus had asked Dumbledore not to call on Mia for Hogwarts patrol in his absences, as she found it strange that it seemed like everyone except Tonks and she were on rotation to guard the school when the Headmaster needed to step away. Tonks was pregnant, a reasonable excuse— but why not her?

Curled up in the armchair, sitting up to her elbows in books, Mia felt like her eyes were weighed down with sandbags as her focus was on events of the past year, rather than the research in front of her. The books on wandless magic had been so far unhelpful— none could tell her why her palms were reacting to stressful situations with tingling and zapping. She huffed, slamming the book in her lap shut and rubbing her face vigorously.

“These books are a dead end!” she groaned.

“Not necessarily— you practically checked out the entire library, I’m sure there is some tidbit in here…”

“There’s nothing!” Mia grumbled “I’ve combed these books; the only explanation I can think of is that I am losing control”

“You are far too old to be…”

“I KNOW!” Mia snapped, grabbing at her hair in frustration

“Could you not bite my head off, please?” Susan asked irritably

“Sorry” Mia grumbled

Susan took a quick breath, forcing a smile. “Why don’t we take a break? You hungry?— I can make something …”

“I’m not hungry”

“Sweetheart…”

“MUM! You’re being overbearing!”

Susan crossed her arms and pursed her lips “You’re going to need some food if you plan to soak up that vodka you snuck into your tea” she said contemptuously 

Mia froze, eyeing her mother out of the corner of her eye.

“How did you know I had liquor in here…?” she said slowly

“Because I can smell it— you poured nearly half the bottle in your cup” Susan said “By the way, bourbon pairs much better with earl grey than vodka does, trust me”

Mia sniffed her tea and bit her lip timidly as she set it on the end table next to her.

“I boozed my tea for years after I send you and your father to America—” Susan sighed “you really are my daughter” she added with a sad shrug.

“How do you do it?”

“Booze my tea??”

“No— maintain such a calm exterior while dealing with all of this bullshit?” Mia asked “I know you struggle when you are alone, but you handle this all much better than me”

“I’ve been on this earth many more years than you, I’ve had practice.”

“I try to keep it in and look like I have it together, but Helen says it’s actually healthy to talk about my feelings”

“Helen is a psychotherapist who is paid to listen to people’s mundane ramblings; of course she wants you to talk about your feelings” Susan said with a satirical snicker.

“I feel better when I do though— when I talk things out. It helps lift the weight off my chest”

 _Then quit boozing your fucking tea and talk, stupid_ her conscience berated her.

Susan sighed, shifting to sit closer. “Sweetheart, you don’t _have_ to keep it bottled up inside, I don’t know where you got this idea that you had to…”

“From you, Mum!” she hissed, feeling a whip of rage inside her. “ _From you!_ ‘Byrne women are strong! We don’t crumble under pressure! We keep our chin up!”

“And all those things are true!” Susan exclaimed “But that doesn’t mean hold it in until the dam breaks! Letting it out every once in a while will keep you from crumbling under pressure”

“And when was it _ever_ ok for me to let it out?” she snapped “I couldn’t ever talk to you— anytime I tried as a kid or teenager you told me to quit crying and to buck up. After Miranda died, you told me to wipe my tears—that life had to go on”

“You had shut down completely! You were acting like a child, starving yourself and letting your grades slip— you needed to pull your bootstraps up and persevere”

“I _was_ a child! I was 13! I needed my mum to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok!” Tears began to fall down Mia’s face as she squeezed her hands into tight fists. “What about whenever I got into fights with Penelope, or when Andrew attacked me in the corridor in 7th year? I just needed your support!”

“I tried to help you— to tell you what to do to fix your situations”

“I DIDN’T NEED YOU TO FIX ME!” she roared “I just needed you to listen! That’s all I needed— not lectures on fortitude or tenacity! I thought I couldn’t talk to you— or anyone, for that matter, so I just kept it all inside. Mia’s ears burned hot as her cheeks itched from her salty tears, “My stepmother _died_ and I held it in, crumbling under the weight of grief because I didn’t think my mum would listen to me cry over a woman she hated”

Susan took a deep, calculated breath “I know you were— _fond_ of her…”

“Fond of her” Mia cut her off, scoffing. “Dumbledore had to assign me my own house elf to make sure I ate my meals— I passed out in Charms for not eating for 6 days. I was more than ‘fond’ of her—I _loved_ her. I know you hated her but Dad falling in love and remarrying falls on your shoulders and yours alone. _You_ were the one who made the decision obliviate Dad and send him off.” Mia began to pick at her fingernails, muttering cynically, just about a whisper “Not that it helped, he still died”

“Amelia Evelyn, you watch your tongue!” Susan hissed “You may be an adult now, but I am still your mother”

“The last person who told me to watch my tongue broke my arm and murdered my father!” Mia shouted angrily, her knuckles white from the tight fists she was squeezing. “He died without knowing the truth about his family, because _you_ took his memories!”

She closed her eyes and took a breath before speaking again once seeing Susan’s face go through a reel of expressions from angry to hurt.

“But really, Mum, what was the point?? What was the point in keeping him in the dark— lying to him for all these years?” Mia said, no longer shouting but tone still harsh “It didn’t help him, it didn’t keep him safe!”

“And you think those thoughts do not keep me up at night?” Susan said slowly, her voice quiet and scarily calm “Scrimgeour told me on the day he was named Minister of Magic that I needn’t worry— he had a plan. He would do more for the fight against Voldemort and wizarding world than Fudge did, and that we’d be just fine.” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “He didn’t keep his promise. Dolohov still got to do what I have feared for over 18 years” 

Mia watched as tears began to well in her mother’s emerald eyes.

“I made a mistake when I modified your father’s memory and sent the two of you off. It wasn’t the way things should’ve been handled. I regret my decision. We would still be married had I not modified his memory. We in the Order could’ve put him in protection. Maybe we would’ve been happy— a happy family— maybe he would still be alive”

Susan began to sob, Mia moving from the armchair to the couch and wrapping her arms around her mother.

“I’m not perfect, but I’ve tried to be. I’ve tried so hard to be the perfect mother for you, but I’ve failed”

“And I’ve tried everything to be the perfect daughter for you, but I’ve failed”

“No Mia, you _are_ perfect. I couldn’t ask for a better daughter— you fierce, bold, kind, loving— I am so proud of you and everything you have done.”

“Really?” Mia asked thickly “I always thought I fell short of your expectations”

“No, sweetheart, you haven’t— and I am sorry if I haven’t told you enough of how proud I am of you.” Susan sniffed “I’ve always been hard on you, pushed you hard because I knew what you were capable of. I thought tough love would shape you into the woman I know you are, but maybe I forgot to encourage you along the way— and for that, I am so _so_ sorry”

Susan kissed Mia’s forehead firmly

“And I want you to know you can talk to me. You can share your feelings, your fears and doubts. Talk out your problems, so you don’t end up shutting down again. I’ll try not to tell you how to fix them.”

Mia nodded, wiping her tears.

“I love you Mum, I’m sorry for getting angry”

Don’t apologize— you just told me it helps you to talk about your feelings” Susan teased softly, Mia chuckling through a sob. “You can talk to us; Me, Penelope, Remus, Tonks, Kingsley— all of us are here for you.”

“I miss Dad. I miss Sirius.” she said quietly “I’m scared all the time. Scared Dolohov will come back and hurt you or me; scared Greyback will snatch me and turn me. Calming draught isn’t enough most days— the alcohol helps numb everything”

“The alcohol helps until it doesn’t” Susan said “Liquor got me through the nights, then the days and nights— but it was alright, I wasn’t drinking on the job.” Susan looked away, shame crossing her expression “until I showed up to work one morning, drunk off my arse.”

“Wait, what?” Mia said, her mouth hanging open.

“No one knew but Kingsley. He found me walking into work, smelling of a distillery. He covered for me and got me home, poured out all my bottles and told me this wasn’t to happen again.” Susan sighed heavily “He told me that he cared about me too much to let me do this to myself anymore. That day he would keep a secret, but if I came into work reeking like booze again, he would turn me in himself.”

“Mum, I had no idea…”

“You were 14, off at school. That was the year you spent Christmas at the Clearwater’s— you spent it with them because I asked them to take you. I was struggling then and I didn’t want you to see me like that over the holidays”

Susan tucked a strand of Mia’s hair behind her ear, staring at the smooth, black strands to avoid eye contact.

“I got it together after that—I know you miss your Dad and Sirius, but I strongly encourage you to quit slipping the booze in your tea at night; it will turn into booze in your morning coffee and shots at lunch”

Mia was quiet for a moment, chewing her bottom lip awkwardly.

“Remus was angry with me yesterday when he caught me pouring rum into my tea”

“because he loves you, and doesn’t want to see you destroy yourself again” Susan said “Remus is a good man—and cares so much for you, I can tell what you two have is real”

"So... you are over the fact that he was my teacher?”

“Oh no no no, I will _never_ condone what the two of you did that year” Susan snickered, wagging her finger at her “but what’s done is done— we can’t change it. I’m just thankful his feelings for you were true— I would’ve hexed his balls off had they not been”

Mia smiled slightly, chuckling softly. “Did he tell Dumbledore to not put me on Hogwarts patrol?”

“No, I did” Susan said “I asked him not to call on you because I didn’t want you to be overwhelmed”

“Tell him to put me back on” she said firmly “I need to feel useful.”

“Only…” Susan smirked “if you quit spiking your drinks” 

Mia smiled slightly, chuckling softly “deal”

They hugged tightly, Mia feeling a wave of affection for her mother. She took note that she felt better once she admitted to the resentment she felt towards Susan for many years; she would have to remember to roll her eyes at Helen for being right— once again.

“You want to keep going with these books?” she suggested

“What’s the point? I can’t find anything in here…”

“What about using them to just learn some wandless magic?” She suggested “if you are losing control, it might help strengthen your magical ability so you don’t _keep_ losing control”

Mia pursed her lips and pondered that thought for a moment, shrugging and grabbing a book off the top of the stack, opening it to the chapter of contents “Alright, fine, let’s see what this shit has to offer— oh look, lighting a candle wandless, how wonderfully helpful!” her tone was dripping in sarcasm.

“Actually, that could be handy— but why did you also check out a book on patronuses?” Susan asked as she held up Corporeal Patronuses: a look at guides and their purpose.

“Oh I forgot I got that one— everyone keeps saying how curious it is that Remus and I share a patronus, so I got that to see if there was any information on it.”

Susan chuckled “You don’t need this book for that— when two people share a patronus, it signifies a deep connection between the two. Love, for instance is a powerful connection. I would say in your case, it signifies your two souls coming together as one”

“You think that?” Mia asked, sitting up straighter.

“That’s why it’s curious— the more I see you two together; the more I believe your soul has bonded with his.”

* * *

Penelope sat down in a cozy, dimly lit booth and immediately grabbed the cocktail menu. She observed the wine list, looking for an acceptable chardonnay. Working in fine wines had made her extremely picky when it came to what she liked to drink, and most of the choices at this little bistro were cheap, bottom shelf options. She uncrossed and crossed her legs a couple times, trying to find a comfortable sitting position before Eric arrived. She picked out a classic black dress for the evening, dreading her evening that would most likely be a boring couple of hours, conversations that had the same depth as a kiddie wading pool. She cursed at a mental picture of Tonks silently, she should’ve told her that truth or dare was for tween girls and she wasn’t going to make a fool of herself by asking out someone pining for her best friend. She wasn’t sure if she even liked Eric as a person; he had always been nice to her, always polite if she would answer the phone for one of his weekly calls to Mia. 

What the hell was she even doing here, going through with this stupid game? This night was pointless, she should’ve cancelled. Sure, she hadn’t been out on a proper date since Percy had broken up with her, and it was time she hit the dating circuit, but this wasn’t a date. This was Nymphadora Tonks’s evil game, a chance to make her squirm; the ultimate prank that she will thoroughly enjoy hearing Penelope recount how downright stodgy this evening would be.

She caught wind of fresh cologne, succeeded by Eric slipping into the booth across from her, his blonde hair neatly styled and his collared shirt pressed to perfection.

“You clean up well” she said with a small smirk, finding she was pleased by the eucalyptus and mint scent lingering around him

“I try.” he grinned, grabbing a cocktail menu. “You, however, look amazing”

Penelope blushed; she hadn’t expected a compliment on her appearance, though she figured it was the polite thing to say when on a dinner date. _Not a date_ she reminded herself. The server came by the table for drink orders, starting with Penelope.

“I’ll just take the house chardonnay, thanks” she said with a polite smile.

“Gin fizz for me— and a glass of water” Eric said, handing the cocktail menu to the server.

The server walked away, leaving Eric and Penelope in an awkward pause.

“So, I was surprised when you called me and asked me out” he said, breaking the silence.

“Yeah… listen— So Mia, Tonks and I had a girl’s night, and we were playing truth or dare, and my dare— per Tonks –was to call you and ask you out, because she knows you’re into Mia.” Penelope explained, Eric’s brow rising as she spoke. “She thought it would be funny. I didn’t expect you to say yes, but you did, so… here we are.”

Eric chuckled at her, a sly grin creeping across his face. “Truth or dare? How old are you guys?”

“I know!! I asked her the same thing. She had Mia call her boyfriend Kingsley and ask him for a pizza. We think she just wanted to play so she could get food out of it” Penelope laughed, “so anyway, I’m sorry that you now have to spend the evening in my company.”

The server returned with drinks, asking the two of them if they were ready to order.

“Maybe just another minute, thanks” he said, flashing a smile at the server.

Penelope couldn’t help but notice how nice his teeth were. They were pearly white compared to his tanned skin.

“I was thinking this was some kind of a sneaky girl thing. I was hoping Mia was trying to use you as her wingman, but with her sugar daddy around, that seemed unlikely.”

“Remus is not her sugar daddy” Penelope snorted into her wine glass

“Yeah, sure… Let me ask you something—” Eric leaned towards her, lowering his voice. “Does he hit her?”

“WHAT?” Penelope cried incredulously. “No— ohmygod no— what makes you think that?”

“Just wondering” Eric mumbled, taking a sip of his gin fizz.

The server came back and asked for their orders, which they very quickly decided on since they were too busy talking. Eric leaned back in the booth, sighing.

“Can you at least enlighten me on why she seemed so into me that night at the bar, but then practically ghosted me after?” he said.

“It’s a long story” Penelope muttered.

Eric shrugged “we have all night”

She sighed and took a sip of wine. “We had a mutual friend pass this summer, unexpectedly. He was a friend of Remus’s that we both got to know well. Mia and he were really close. She was devastated when he passed and Remus served as a reminder to her of him, so she pushed him away. She became reckless after she broke up with him, partying and doing cocaine. You caught her on a particularly bad night, and unfortunately, she used you for your dick.”

Eric nodded, his face puzzled as he processed what Penelope was saying.

“That doesn’t make much sense” he said, his brow furrowing together.

"It’s not my story to tell, I can only give generalities.” She shrugged.

Eric paused for a moment, looking like he was going to ask another question, but didn’t. He nodded stiffly as he stirred his gin fizz,

“Sorry to hear about your friend”

“Thank you” she whispered, taking a sip of her wine as she thought of Sirius, her heart aching as she imagined him smiling that wide toothy grin at her.

Eric sat up, and flashed a handsome smile.

“Well, Penelope, It’s Friday night— and even though you only asked me here because your friend with the weird name dared you to, here we sit. We might as well try to enjoy ourselves.” He said “Why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

“About me?”

“Yes, you” he chuckled

“Alright… well, my birthday is January 28th, 1976—”

Eric started laughing; flashing another charming smile at her “I’m not interviewing you for your passport”

“You asked me about myself!” She jeered, laughing with him “Ok fine- My parents own a wine and cheese shop that I manage currently, I was born here in London, I’m an only child, and I enjoy cleaning.”

“No one enjoys cleaning.” He teased.

“I do actually, I’m always cleaning. Plus, Mia is a messy cook and she thinks she wiped everything up, but I’ll find a crumb or two after she’s been in the kitchen”

“Oh no, not a crumb!” Eric teased, making Penelope roll her eyes at him “ok ok, I’m from Cincinnati— that’s in Ohio; I have two younger sisters and I HATE to clean…”

 

The night seemed to fly by, much to Penelope’s surprise. She and Eric actually had a lot of similar interests, fueling the conversation naturally without any strange pauses for awkward change of subjects. They talked and laughed until they were the only ones left in the bistro, completely unaware they were in the restaurant past closing.

“You get a free vacation and can choose between these three; Skiing in the Alps, snorkeling at the Great Barrier Reef, or a safari in Tanzania?” Eric said, leaning back in the booth and grinning

“I have to pick one?? Those all sound amazing!”

“Yes, only one, it’s a free vacation— can’t get greedy now”

“Alright, alright, if I had to pick one… snorkeling at the Great Barrier Reef” Penelope said giggling. “Wait, no— no. yes. _Shit_ — Ok. Great Barrier Reef— final answer!”

“That’s what I’d choose!” he laughed “but I would like to do all three at some point in my life”

They were enjoying themselves immensely, only to be interrupted by their server bringing by two small shot glasses and a black checkbook.

“Anyone who is having this much fun on a date should have a complimentary shot” the server said, setting the two shot glasses and checkbook down on the table. “a nice nightcap— I’ll be back for that in just a moment”

“That is the _nicest_ way I’ve been told to get the fuck out of a restaurant” Eric said with a chuckle, looking at his watch. “Shit— it’s after 11:00!”

“Wow, It feels like we just got here” Penelope giggled, watching Eric slide a few crisp bills in the checkbook slot and stand it upright.

The server came by swiftly to take the checkbook as Penelope and Eric were taking their shots.

“So, this ended up being a great evening” he said shaking his head furiously, his voice strained from the burn of his shot.

“yeah, it was, I didn’t intend on staying out this late” Penelope said, throwing her purse over her shoulder “I have to open the shop tomorrow morning”

"You thought we’d be here _maybe_ an hour, and eat in silence awkwardly?” Eric teased, winking at her.

“Well, I wasn’t sure… but honestly, I had a great time.” She said sheepishly.

“Me too” He said, his pearly white teeth flashing at her as he smiled “can I walk you home?”

Penelope smiled brilliantly and flushed a deep shade of scarlet “I’d like that.”


	42. chapter 42

“Mia!” Delphinus called from inside her office.

Mia set down a stack of files that she was making copies of and trotted over to Delphinus’s office. She cursed at herself in her mind, wondering if she messed up her coffee order again.

_Troll sized latte with 2 pumps butterscotch, 4 pumps dark chocolate, 2 sugar cubes, 3 shots of espresso steamed twice and **absolutely no foam.**_

No, it had to be correct— Calista herself of Calista Calderon’s coffee shop now knew her by name, as well as both of them could probably recite Delphinus’s order in their sleep.

Mia poked her head inside the doorway, looking at her boss reading a purple letter that was once folded into an airplane. The back of the paper had the Ministry of Magic logo stamped on it, as well as in large gold writing ‘interdepartmental memo”.

“I’m here” 

“They need you as a scribe during high court today; they have 3 cases and the usual scribe is ill” Delphinus said “those files will be there tomorrow, go ahead and head down to the bottom courtrooms; Dolores is expecting you now”

“Dolores?” Mia asked, curious.

“Yes, Dolores Umbridge”

Mia felt her stomach drop, she had heard all about Dolores Umbridge, but hadn’t had the misfortune of meeting the woman in person.

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

“Yes, yes— now go!” Delphinus shooed her away.

Mia rolled her eyes as she took off for the courtrooms. She must’ve made a good impression during her first month here at the Ministry for them to pull her as a substitute scribe, but she wasn’t sure how. All she did was sort and copy the copious amounts of files that Delphinus always piled sky high on her desk. 

She scurried down the hall, feeling excited to get to scribe for the high court today but anxious at meeting the infamous Dolores Umbridge. Everyone she knew talked so low about her. She made her way to the lifts, entering one at the same time as Susan and a couple other Aurors were. 

“Mum!” she whispered excitedly as the gates closed “I’m working as a scribe today!”

“That’s wonderful dear! Did Dolores send for you? I put in good word with her” Susan said with a small smile.

“She did— I didn’t know you and Dolores Umbridge are friends?” Mia said as her brow furrowed

“Oh sweetie _please,_ that woman is a downright terror; no— she thinks we are though. I play Dolores Umbridge’s game better than she does.” Susan smirked “Word of advice, play her game too.”

“So… kiss her ass?”

“Not quite kiss it…” Susan said “Well, maybe— just don’t challenge her if she says something that upsets you— let it roll off you”

“I don’t think I understand” Mia said as the lift stopped.

“Just don’t mouth off, she is bound to say something horrid— I’ll explain later. Also, do not mention Remus to her _at all_ — she isn’t fond of werewolves”

Mia nodded, remembering Remus going off on a tangent about her the year previous. She had been one of the front runners behind many anti-werewolf legislations recently passed.

“This is my stop— good luck!” Susan said as she exited the lift and turned out of sight.

The lift lowered Mia down to the very bottom level of the Ministry. The gate opened as the disembodied voice beginning to speak. Mia didn’t hear what the lift was saying as her attention was now on a very short woman with a toad-like face in all pink robes standing at the entrance to the lift; a black satin bow perched on top of her head.

“You must be Amelia, oh you look just like your mother!” the woman crooned, her voice high, breathy and girlish, very different from how Mia was expecting her to speak.

“You must be Dolores Umbridge, it’s a pleasure” Mia said with a warm smile, extending her hand out to shake it.

Umbridge smiled wide at Mia’s charming tone, miming for her to follow her down the hall.

“Now, today is going to be fairly straight forward, we have three cases. All you have to do is record the proceedings of each case.”

“Sure, I can do that”

Umbridge began rattling off the typical order for the Wizengamot court proceedings as she and Mia walked into the courtroom. A smaller, frizzy haired witch thrusted deep purple court robes into Mia’s arms.

“Put those robes on— just over your clothes is fine” Umbridge instructed as she led Mia over to the scribe’s seat. The Wizengamot sat in an amphitheater-like fashion, the scribe’s seat at the very end of the front bench. “Usually I sit just left of the middle next to Pius— you know, Head of Magical Law Enforcement? But since it’s your first time scribing, I’ll be seated next to you”

“Thank you for this opportunity, Dolores, this is very exciting” Mia said, laying the charm on thick. She was channeling her inner Percy Weasley— proud, pompous, and eager.

“Yes, indeed it is!” Umbridge squeaked, looking positively delighted by Mia’s demeanor “let’s just hope justice is served today”

They took their seats as more Wizengamot members started filing in to their places amongst the rows. A set of three case files sat in front of Mia with the defendant’s name and today’s date stamped in red ink across the front of the folders. She looked around to see that every seat at the Wizengamot had its own set of files, understanding why Delphinus always had her make so many copies. She opened the files, curious as to what cases were coming her way.

The first case was a middle aged woman who worked as an Unspeakable, allegedly speaking to someone about the nature of her job, and was being tried for violating her employment contract.

The second case was an older man who was caught stealing 200 galleons worth of books from Flourish and Blotts, and blasted through bookshelves to try to evade capture, being tried for theft and property damage.

The third case made Mia’s stomach flip flop; a 19-year old werewolf was being tried for murder because he killed a muggle family camping in a nearby forest during the full moon. She felt nauseas, thinking how that could’ve been Remus at any time during his life, during the one night of the month that he couldn’t control his actions. She began to zone out, unaware that the room was now full of the Wizengamot jury. She only snapped back to focus when she saw a woman and two guards approaching a chair in the middle of the room. The chair’s shackles attached to her wrists and ankles by themselves, ensuring the defendant could not run from the court room. Mia picked up her quill and told herself to focus— she could daydream at lunch.

“Alberta Pinsley, on the charge of Violation of Employment Contract…”

The two cases ended up being very straightforward, the Unspeakable getting her charges cleared and the book thief going to Azkaban for 6 months. Being a scribe was very easy, the quill was enchanted to write for her, and she just had to watch it to ensure there were no errors.

“Next up, werewolf Jasper Hughes on the charge of murder in the first degree—” Pius Thicknesse’s voice called as a tall, blonde, sickly looking bloke was escorted to the chair, the magical shackles attaching themselves to his wrists and ankles as he sat. “The defendant is charged with murdering a muggle family this past summer in the Forest of Dean. Now, Mr. Hughes, what do you plea on these charges?” 

“Not guilty, sir” Hughes said, his voice shaking.

“Can you tell us what you were doing the night before you were found unconscious next to a slashed and dead family?”

“It was a full moon— I usually try to put myself deep into the woods during the cycle so I won’t be near anybody” Hughes started “the moon rose, and I turned, but I didn’t realize there was a family camping nearby”

Hughes started to shake as he was recanting his story, Mia growing more anxious and sympathetic for the werewolf seated in front of her. She noticed his tattered and faded clothing, wondering when the last time he was able to buy new robes for himself.

“I was able to smell them, so I made my way to their camp” Hughes eyes glistened “I had no control over what I was doing— I swear”

“Ahem, ahem” Umbridge fake coughed, flashing an ugly smile at Thicknesse “Pius, if I may?”

“You may, Dolores” Thicknesse said with a nod in her direction.

Umbridge adjusted herself in her chair, looking rather pleased. She opened her case file, looking at it for a moment before turning her false, ugly smile towards Hughes.

“Now Mr. Hughes, as a werewolf, why were you not using the wolfsbane potion?” Umbridge asked, her girlish voice not lacking a slightly condescending tone.

“I do, if I have it, but I ran out the month before”

“And _why_ didn’t you procure more?”

Umbridge folded her hands on the table in front of her, sitting up straight. Mia was reminded of a Venus Flytrap in this moment, Umbridge waiting to snap her prey at just the right moment

“I— I can’t afford it right now” he stammered “I’m between jobs— I live with my family, a kid sister; it’s not safe for them if shut myself in the cellar. I’ve been able to get out before”

“So your family is safe— but what about the family you killed? How were they supposed to be safe from you?” 

“I didn’t mean to hurt them!! I’ve been using that forest for three years and I’ve never came across people camping. It’s always been a safe place.”

“So you remember slicing apart each member of that innocent muggle family?” Umbridge asked— her tone was unnaturally sweet and artificial.

“Y— yes, but I wasn’t in control of my actions— I wouldn’t’ve hurt them willingly”

Hughes was shaking uncontrollably, tears streaming down his face. Mia felt like she had been punched in the gut; her heart was breaking for the man in front of her, and she felt a rush of anger for the way Umbridge was berading him—angry that her ignorance would potentially punish Hughes for something he couldn’t control. The mysterious electric tingle returned to her palms, feeling like little prickles of electrical current zapping at her skin.

“We’ve always tried to keep others safe. My parents homeschooled me so I wouldn’t hurt any of my classmates— I’ve been a werewolf since I was 8. Please, I would never harm anyone knowingly— please you have to believe me…”

“I find it rather convenient that a family ends up dead the one full moon you ‘just so happened’ to be out of wolfsbane” Umbridge said, leaning forward “I know your kind— manipulative, blood thirsty— you half-breeds love the taste of human flesh and use the full moon as an excuse to avoid punishment for your actions”

Mia watched in horror as Hughes sobbed and begged for mercy in front of the Wizengamot. How could Umbridge be so ignorant as to think this poor man enjoyed the slaughter? Fenrir Greyback might be a savage werewolf, but Umbridge and the rest of the wizarding world were ignorant to think that all werewolves were vicious like him. Jasper Hughes was misunderstood— most werewolves were misunderstood— _Remus_ was misunderstood. The way Hughes describes his fears for his family’s safety, and his lack of income to be able to procure such an expensive potion were all things that she had heard coming out of Remus’s mouth at some point.

Mia felt a burning hatred for the woman next to her. It took everything within her to not stand up and scream at the top of her lungs at the ridiculousness of the high court for even entertaining this. She watched as Thicknesse and the jury panel took a moment to talk over the verdict, as well as watched the pale and sickly Hughes sob over the looming decision. Show him mercy, please, show him mercy— he wouldn’t’ve hurt them if he could help it.

“The Wizengamot high court finds Jasper Hughes guilty of murder, and sentences him to 10 years in Azkaban” Thicknesse called, pounding a gavel on his desk “Take him away”

“NO! PLEASE! I DIDN’T MEAN TO HURT THEM!” Hughes screamed as he was being escorted out of the room. “YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME!”

Mia could’ve sworn her heart stopped for a split second. She dug her fingernails into her palms, to keep her hands from shaking. Bile was rising in her throat, her stomach in knots. She felt a hand pat her back gently, turning to look at the toad-face woman next to her.

“Well I must say justice has been served today, don’t you think, Amelia? The half breeds always get what they deserve”

Mia nodded and forced a fake smile as she handed Umbridge the scribe records from the three cases, wishing nothing more than to punch her square in the face.

“You don’t look so good, are you feeling alright?”

“Yeah, must just be something I ate” Mia lied smoothly “I think I need the loo, if that’s alright?”

“Of course— go, go” Umbridge insisted, ushering her away.

Mia slipped off her Wizengamot robes and laid them on the bench, and then took off quickly for the bathroom. Her heels clacked loudly against the marble floor as she scurried down the hall; she felt like her stomach was in her throat, and her heart was pounding in her ears. She was angry, angry that someone like Jasper Hughes didn’t have access to wolfsbane, that he had to put himself in the woods to keep his family safe, that the system was rigged against him just because a few Wizengamot members hate werewolves, that other werewolves go through the same prejudice and fears every full moon because there is no access to resources like wolfsbane or protective rooms.

She ran into the bathroom and busted open one of the stalls with her shoulder. She threw herself at the toilet and began to hurl. Her palms almost burned as the electric feeling tingled between her skin and the toilet bowl as she gripped the porcelain receptacle. Tears streamed down her face as she recalled Hughes cries for mercy over and over in her head, agonizing over his fate as she emptied the contents of her stomach.

* * *

Mia bustled in the door of her flat, throwing her purse down and kicking her shoes off angrily. She ripped her coat off and threw it onto the table with an angry grunt. Remus sat up sharply from his post on the couch, his eyes following her as she stormed into her bedroom.

“Hey, how was…”

The rest of his sentence was inaudible by Mia slamming her bedroom door shut. She tore off her clothes, feeling like she was suffocating in the tight skirt she had worn that day. She turned on the shower at full blast heat, stepping in and letting the water pound her face as she tried to push today’s events out of her head. The water hit her like a thousand needles— the temperature difference from the steaming shower and her cold skin from the chilly March air outside shocked her system.

“Mia?” Remus’s voice came from the doorway of the bathroom “is everything ok?”

“I’m fine!”

The water was turning her skin pink, but the heat felt good to her.

“You want me to join you…?” Remus said slyly, pulling the shower curtain back.

“NO!” she snarled, smacking his hand that was now visible.

“Alright, alright; I’ll give you some space”

Mia took another ten minutes to mull her day over in the boiling shower before getting out, wrapping herself in a fluffy towel. She exited the bathroom to find Remus sitting on the edge of the bed, transfiguring the lamp to a button over and over.

“Sorry” she grumbled as she towel dried her hair.

“Bad day?” he asked

“Terrible”

Remus nodded, not pressing her. “I’ll let you get dressed” he said as he rose to exit the bedroom.

“Remus—“

He turned back to her, looking at the tears swimming in her hazel eyes.

“I didn’t realize how— how _bad_ things are for werewolves”

“What got you thinking about that?” he asked, stepping back towards her and wrapping his arms around her

“I scribed for the Wizengamot today…”

“That’s amazing, congratulations!”

“It was— until we tried and convicted a werewolf who mauled a muggle family during a full moon.”

Remus’s face fell, Mia knew he was feeling exactly the way she was by his expression.

“He can’t afford wolfsbane, and he couldn’t stay in his family’s cellar because it wasn’t secure enough.”

“It takes a lot of powerful enchantments to keep a werewolf in” he said quietly.

“He was nineteen, Remus, _nineteen_. Was turned at eight, has a kid sister. He is a person, and they threw him to Azkaban like trash”

“How long did he get?” he asked somberly

“10 years”

Remus sighed heavily, his face going through a few expressions.

“There needs to be wolfsbane readily available for all werewolves” Mia began “Maybe some kind of help center where you can stay in a heavily guarded room for the night, if you don’t have access to one.”

“If a place like that existed, the world would be a better place for many werewolves.”

* * *

The weekend came around along with Remus’s birthday on Saturday and Tonks’s baby shower on Sunday. Penelope had been on 3 dates that week already, and was supposed to be gone for a 4th on Saturday. Mia teased her about the mysterious blokes she was seeing, poking and prodding her for information, but Penelope wouldn’t budge. Ever since her dinner with Eric, she claimed she was out ‘testing the waters’, but remained very secretive.

“Alright, I’m leaving— wow this place looks great!” Penelope exclaimed when she walked out of her bedroom to see Mia had decorated.

“Thanks, I think he’ll like it” Mia smiled “you look good, can I at least know where today’s mystery bloke is taking you?”

“I think we’re staying in” Penelope said casually “cooking dinner and watching a movie at his place”

“Going to score a home run?”

“A what??” Penelope laughed

“You know— doing the old bump and grind, having an afternoon delight, hitting skins…”

“OHMYGOD! Stop stop stop stop” she squealed in disgust, waving her hands frantically. “You’re not funny!”

“Yes I am” Mia winked and flashed a devious grin. “Is the sex at least good with this one?”

“Yes,” Penelope said sheepishly, a wry grin spreading across her face. “It’s— well, _very_ good”

“Penelope Clearwater— you little _minx!_ ” Mia scoffed playfully, slapping her arm gently “Come on, tell me about him! At least give me _some_ details!” 

“No, no, no— I’ve got to go, I’m going to be late!” she said as she grabbed her coat and hustled out the front door. “Goddammit its cold!” She hollered as she stepped into the frigid air.

Mia chuckled and shook her head; she was dying to know who Penelope had been spending so much time with. She leaned onto the dining room table and looked out at the scene she had created. She had picked up what seemed like a billion candles, trying to recreate his date night décor from the night he created for her at the cottage two years ago. The candles gave the living room and her bedroom a soft glow, almost like the soft white lights of their Christmas tree had done over the holidays. She sent Remus out to pick up food for dinner so she could set up for her hopefully romantic evening. She set the table for two, and pulled out a couple bottles of wine from their cabinet, hoping one of them would pair well with whatever he was going to bring back. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by Remus bustling in through the front door, carrying two large bags of food. His hair was windswept, and his cheeks and nose pink from the crisp, cold air whipping at his face. It was unseasonably cold for mid-March; temperatures feeling like it were still in the dead of winter.

“I didn’t want to apparate with the food, but I wish I would’ve. It’s col—“

He stopped when he saw the many candles illuminating the flat, His smile spread from ear to ear as surveyed the scene. 

“This flat cleans up nice”

“Happy Birthday!” she cried cheerily “what did you pick up?”

“I couldn’t decide on pasta, or burgers, so I got both. I hope your appetite is up for it” he said, setting the bags on the kitchen counter.

“Did you get cheesecake?” she asked, peering into the one of the bags.

Remus pulled out two cartons from another bag and grinned “I knew better than to come back without some”

“I’ve trained you well” she teased, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him. “It’s your birthday and you get my favorite dessert; I told you I’m a woman who gets what she wants”

Dinner was pleasant; they spent a couple hours eating and talking while consuming an entire bottle of wine. When they finished eating, they curled up on the couch with a few fluffy throw blankets, watching _The Elephant Man_ , a personal favorite of Remus’s since he was introduced to Penelope’s vast collection of VHS tapes. Mia began to feel sleepy; she was so cozy snuggled next to him, warm from his body heat radiating under their throw blankets. She closed her eyes— just for a moment— she only wanted to rest them for a second.

“Mia?” he murmured in her ear

Her eyes fluttered open. “I was just resting my eyes, just for a moment!” she said, sitting up abruptly. 

She looked at the television, which displayed the end credits scrolling slowly upward. She looked back at him and smiled sheepishly “shit, sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry” he chuckled, kissing her forehead. “Blow these candles out and come to bed?”

“Yeah” she whispered and smiled at him.

He retreated into the bedroom, while Mia grabbed her wand off the coffee table and began waving it to extinguish the candles in the living room. She turned off the television, and grabbed the leftovers and piled them into the fridge.

Remus was already turning down the covers as Mia walked into the bedroom. He cast heating charms on the bed linens to combat the icy chill seeping through the crack in the window pane. She was pleased to see he hadn’t blown out the candles in the bedroom yet, the soft ethereal glow giving her a sense of peace. She leaned against the dresser, watching him as he moved. He was so handsome— his hair streaked with gray made him look distinguished. She watched the way his arms flexed as he adjusted the bed covers, his muscles rippling under his shirt. She loved him, this man before her; she loved him with every fiber of her being.

She felt an out of place surge of anger for the world they lived in. This man— this wonderful, handsome, kind, amazing man has experienced such hate, such prejudice, all because of a simple illness. How could they not look beyond the wolf, to see how wonderful he was despite his furry little problem that plagued him once a month? She was able to see beyond the wolf— easily, for that fact; it was never an issue for her. She realized early on that what he was didn’t change who he was. He was Remus John Lupin— a skilled wizard, someone with a knack for dark creatures, brave, loving, and strong. Being a werewolf didn’t take any of these things away from him, so why did the rest of the world seem to view it that way?

“Remus…” she said softly.

He looked up at her, his blue eyes twinkling in the dim candlelight. The corners of his mouth turned up in to a slight smile, the fine lines around his eyes crinkling. 

“hmm?” he hummed.

She walked over to him and looked into his eyes, smiling slightly. She reached up to his shirt collar and began unbuttoning his shirt. He kept his hands at his side as she slid his button down off of his shoulders. He smiled wider as she pulled his undershirt off him by the bottom hem.

“It makes me so angry when people are prejudice against werewolves, just because of one or two bad seeds” she said as his hands reached for her cardigan.

He stopped and snickered softly “This is a very erotic conversation…” He teased.

“Shut up!” She quipped “I’m trying this whole ‘talking about my feelings’ bullshit and I think it’ll be easier if I am undressing you while I do it”

“Alright, alright, I’m sorry, continue—“ he said with a small nod.

He slipped her cardigan off, his hands moving over her bare arms slowly as her hands ran along his chest as, her fingertips running along his smooth white scars that resembled her own. 

“I feel angry because if you didn’t have your condition, it would fix most of your life’s problems”

He pulled her t-shirt over her head and tossed it aside gently. 

“I feel angry because people like Jasper Hughes are rotting in Azkaban— because they can’t control themselves”

His hands slid around her back and found her bra clasp, unhooking it in one swift motion. She pulled her ponytail out, her dark mane cascaded over her pale shoulders; the tips of her hair brushing against her nipples as she gently shook her hair. Remus cupped her face with one hand, his thumb stroking her smooth cheek. 

“I understand your frustration; I have had many bouts of anger when it comes to the hand I was dealt in life. You are too good for this world”

She unbuttoned his trousers, the material of his boxers’ silky smooth on her hands as she pushed his pants to the floor, his erection now very obvious through the thin material. 

“I want to do something to help werewolves” she said “I don’t know what, but I want to make life better for them”

“You make this werewolf’s life better”

He got down on his knees and slid her jeans down, feeling her tense slightly as he was level with her now most hated part of her body. He kissed the scars on her left gently, starting at the top of her hip and trailing down to where they end a few inches above her knee, and then switched to the right.

“You’re beautiful, so beautiful” he murmured between soft kisses, feeling her body relax as he took his time to love on the parts of her she loathed.

He picked her up, carrying her to the bed and laying her down. He fluffed the pillows behind her, ensuring her comfort. He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead softly, trailing small kisses down her cheek, jaw and neck.

“It’s just bullshit— I don’t understand why people can’t see the person beyond the wolf!” She continued, breaking the romantic mood they had fallen into.

Remus stopped and sighed, chuckling “I thought by getting naked you were wanting to shag— did I read the signs wrong? Or we can stop if you’d rather just talk?”

“No no no— birthday sex is good sex, continue” she said, motioning for him to continue.

He continued his trail of kisses as he hooked a couple fingers around the waistband of her panties, ready to pull them down.

“I mean, what’s honestly the big deal about being a werewolf, I really don’t see why anyone would care??”

Remus stopped again, laughing “Mia—“

“What?”

“Shut up”

Her panties were off in one fluid motion. Their hips rocked against each other’s as she dug her nails into his back, clawing and grabbing at his flesh as she felt herself begin to melt underneath him. She loved this man— this wonderful man who was brought her so much passion, so much joy and so much love; how could anyone hate him for such a minute part of him? They held each other after they both finished, feelings of love and comfort flooding through her as she gently brushed his jawline with the back or her fingers, feeling the prickly stubble of his 5 o clock shadow.

“This has been a fantastic birthday, thank you” he murmured as he kissed her forehead

She nodded, nuzzling herself closer to him. He embraced her a little tighter, closing his eyes and smiling.

“I love you, Remus” she whispered softly.

“I love you Amelia”

“Ew—“ Her nose crinkled up as she adjusted her head to look at him. “I hate when you call me Amelia”

They laughed together, Mia listening to his heartbeat and his voice vibrate in his chest as they lay there and jeered at each other for a few minutes. After a moment pause, Remus adjusted himself to look at her, his expression falling serious. 

“Shouldn’t Penelope have been home by now?”

Mia glanced over at the clock. 12:53am.

“Ehh, she’s probably still banging one out with the mystery bloke. I’ll worry if she isn’t home when we wake up”

* * *

“She could’ve called!” Mia growled as she clanked around the kitchen, flour on her nose and her hair falling out of its ponytail around her face. “Or sent an owl— or shit, even a carrier pigeon for all I care!”

“Let’s calm down— she didn’t give you a name or anything? Even an address?” Remus asked as he whipped a bowl of icing.

They were making cupcakes for Tonks’s baby shower that afternoon, worried to have woken up to find Penelope hadn’t come home last night.

“Nothing! She was supposed to help me with these damn cupcakes too!”

Mia was livid as she poured cupcake batter into the baking pans, splattering a little bit of batter onto the button down shirt she had stolen from Remus’s side of the closet. 

“Could you be careful with my shirt?” Remus said, pointing his wand at the stain dripping down the front and siphoning off the batter. “That one is my favorite”

“Well if Penelope had come home, I wouldn’t be rushing around _therefore_ your shirt wouldn’t’ve gotten dirty!” She snapped “What if something happened to her? What if someone got to her?”

As she spoke, Penelope came bustling in the front door, still dressed in her clothes from the previous night, performing the treacherous ‘walk of shame’.

“Sorry, I had fallen asleep…”

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?” Mia hollered, throwing a dish towel at her “you had me worried sick!”

“I’m sorry!” Penelope cried, throwing her arms in front of her face to shield the incoming projectile. “I didn’t mean to stay the night there— I would’ve called had I known I wasn’t coming home”

“I thought something might’ve happened to you” Mia huffed “you are always the responsible one; I’m not used to having to worry”

“I know, but I’m not dead, see?” Penelope smiled awkwardly, starting off towards her room. “I need a shower”

“ _Penelope_ ” 

Remus’s stern voice made both Mia and Penelope flinch. She turned back to him, eyeing him nervously.

“It’s not a good idea for you to be going out with people we don’t know, as well as not telling one of us where you are. It’s not safe.”

“Sorry Remus…” she said softly “I really didn’t mean to make you guys worry”

She turned back to her room and scurried inside, shutting the door behind her. Mia started laughing as she wiped the flour off her face, shaking her head slightly.

“Why are you laughing?” Remus asked, his tone slightly irritated with how quickly Mia’s demeanor did a complete 180.

“Did you see her hair?? She had some great sex last night”

* * *

“How am I supposed to be a father? I don’t know the first thing about babies” Kingsley said to Susan, standing in the corner of the kitchen as he watched Tonks open a gift containing baby bottles.

Tonks’s baby bump was growing by the day, along with Kingsley’s anxiety. Susan had agreed to throw the shower, the entire Order of the Phoenix, Tonks’s parents, and Penelope came out to celebrate the little boy who would be making his arrival in just a few short weeks. Susan had decked the house out in blue and silver streamers and balloons, and had a banner tacked to one of the living room walls reading _‘Congratulations Kingsley and Tonks; it’s a boy’._

“No one knows how to be a parent” Susan chuckled “you kind of just do it”

“But what if I screw up? What if I’m not a good father? It’s not like we planned to do this…” 

“Kingsley, if you’re half as good a father as you are a wizard, you will be more than ok,” Susan said, clasping her hand on his shoulder reassuringly. “You will make a great dad”

“Thanks Susan, that means a lot coming from you.” Kingsley said, smiling warmly at her.

“Yes, and you know I’m always right, so…” Susan teased, smirking.

Kingsley laughed and shook his head “yes, how could I forget; the first day we argued after I was assigned as your partner you said ‘Kingsley Shacklebolt, do not argue with me, I am always right’” he said in a mocking tone.

Susan playfully shoved him as she rolled her eyes at him. 

“I just worry about bringing a child into the world now, with the war upon us” he said, his smile fading.

“Mia was born right before the thick of it last time, I know the anxiety you are feeling.” Susan nodded “Worried what will happen to your family, will you be able to keep them safe, what lengths will you be able to take to ensure their well-being…”

“Kingsley, my love, look what Mia and Remus got us!!” Tonks hollered, catching their attention.

Tonks held up a few baby things that Kingsley had never seen anything like them before in his life, but gave thumbs up to Mia and Remus.

“Thanks, guys” he said, waving politely.

Susan smiled at him and squeezed his shoulder gently as Tonks began opening her next gift. “All you have to do is love that child, Kingsley. Love that child more than you’ve ever loved anyone in your entire life and the rest will fall into place. I have 100% confidence that you and Tonks will make fine parents, you guys will figure it out as you go along.”

Susan kissed him on the cheek and retreated back to the punch bowl. Kingsley watched as Tonks opened a couple more gifts, revealing more baby equipment that he hadn’t ever seen before. He didn’t realize how much stuff babies required. He had no idea how he was going to figure all this out. Death Eaters and Voldemort himself seemed less intimidating than the little bundle of joy growing inside Tonks’s belly. He stood there and watched her face light up at the many onesies and baby toys, eating some of Molly’s homemade chocolate chip cookies, whispering under his breath.

“I’m so fucked”


	43. chapter 43

Life seemed to be returning to normal as the weather shifted warmer. Mia’s sessions with Helen had been proving to be effective, her anxiety growing less intense as she applied Helen’s ‘homework’ to her daily life. After her discussion with Susan on alcohol consumption, Mia made every effort to stay away from the bottles on the counter when she was feeling upset or anxious. Rather, she turned to Remus— crying in his arms clutching a picture of her and Sirius, and to Penelope— when Remus left for the next full moon, sealing her and her fears inside the flat with the wards he and Kingsley designed to keep her in, and Fenrir Greyback out.

Thankfully, things had been quiet when it came to Greyback or Dolohov. Not a peep had been heard about Dolohov coming back for Susan ever since Voldemort tortured him for making a spectacle of his vendetta, and Greyback hadn’t been spotted ever since he paid her a visit in Diagon Alley. Fear still loomed inside Mia, knowing at some point she would come in contact with both of them again.

Penelope seemed to be gone from the flat more and more, still not budging with any details as to where and who she was seeing. Remus had gotten extremely angry with her one evening (albeit the night before the full moon), raising his voice about how irresponsible it was for her to go out and not tell at least someone where she was going. She had retorted with a crude gesture, quips about how she can take care of herself and he could mind his own business (he was not her boyfriend or her father, as she informed him), and slamming the front door shut before apparating away from the flat. She had stayed gone until she came home from work the next day, avoiding Remus until he had gone for the cycle. She had found Mia hiding in her closet, wand gripped tightly in her hand, just in case Fenrir Greyback decided to collect on the bite or two of her that Dolohov promised him.

They had spent that full moon in her bed, Mia crying over her fears as Penelope apologized profusely for not coming home sooner. All seemed to be forgiven in the morning when Remus came home, as he and Penelope were cordial to each other, not speaking of nor seemingly still upset about their fight. Despite their argument, Penelope continued to go places without informing either of them of her location. Eric had quit calling the flat for Mia, a detail that neither Mia nor Remus had connected with Penelope running off to see a secret date.

An Owl came in the beginning of April, announcing that Kingsley and Tonks’s son had arrived, and they had delivered at St. Mungo’s. Walking through the halls of the hospital with one arm linked with Penelope’s, both of them nearly skipping with joy as Remus walked behind them, Mia was ecstatic to meet the child of two of her best friends. Walking into the maternity ward, they were greeted by the other members of the Order and Tonks’s parents, all huddled around Tonks sitting on her hospital bed, cradling a sleeping infant.

“They’re here, now you can tell us!” Molly said excitedly

“Tell us what?” Mia asked, her face lighting up when she saw the small newborn was bundled in a blue hand-knitted blanket, certain it was Molly’s handiwork.

“Zee baby name!” Fleur cried, her eyes sparkling.

“Alright alright” Tonks said, raising her free hand. “Shut up you lot”

She looked up at Kingsley standing to the left of her bed. He smiled brilliantly, and nodded.

“We are happy to announce the arrival of our son, Reginald Volturnus Tonks-Shacklebolt”

Everyone clapped enthusiastically; Susan had tears welling up in the corner of her eyes as she hugged Kingsley and kissed him firmly on the cheek.

“Bit of a mouthful, don’t you think?” Mia teased, sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Well, yeah, but so is Nymphadora…” Tonks said, shooting her mother a sideways glance. “We’ll call him Reggie.”

“Reggie, I love it.” Mia smiled

“Amelia, move- I need to hold this child…” Susan interjected, pushing Mia from her seated position.

Mia made her way back over to Remus and Penelope as Susan took the baby from Tonks, her eyes lighting up as she cradled him.

“Who do you think he looks like?” Mia asked

“He’s 5 hours old, he just looks like a baby” Remus teased. 

“I’d be curious to see if he is a metamorphmagus as well” Penelope said, eyeing the infant curiously. “Does the trait run in families?”

They stood around and made idle small talk for a few minutes, Reggie being passed around from person to person, everyone eager to hold the new baby. Just as it was almost Mia’s turn to hold him, Kingsley shuffled over to her and Remus, putting a hand on each of their shoulders.

“Can I speak with you two privately?” he asked; his deep voice just above a whisper. 

They followed Kingsley to the edge of the ward, pulling them into a quiet corner.

“What’s going on?” Remus asked, his brow furrowing.

“Dora and I were wondering if you two would be Reggie’s godparents” Kingsley said, a small smile spreading on his face.

“Oh, Kingsley, wow— you sure?” Mia asked.

“Absolutely, Dora and I have talked about it for months. We can’t think of anyone we’d rather ask”

She was overwhelmed with honor and adoration at this request. She wasn’t sure if she would ever be able to put into words how much it meant to her.

“We would be honored” Remus said, shaking Kingsley’s hand firmly as his other arm wrapped around Mia’s waist. “Congratulations to you and Tonks”

“Thanks. I don’t know the first thing about babies, so we’ll see how well this will go”

* * *

_Stop, please, don’t hurt him!_

The screams in agony coming from her father were too much; she couldn’t stand to see him in this kind of pain.

“Mia??” she heard a woman’s voice say through his screaming.

_You want me to stop his pain?_ Dolohov yelled over her father’s shrieks, his twisted face grinning eagerly.

“MIA!!!”

Her eyes flew open, only to find herself in her dark bedroom with Penelope standing over her— a terrified look plastered to her face.

“You were screaming” she said, her face drained of color.

Mia wiped cold sweat from her brow, sitting up in bed. She felt disoriented, unsure of which scene was a dream or reality. 

“Are you ok?” a male voice asked, Mia just now noticing the man standing shirtless in the doorway to her bedroom.

“Eric??” Mia said incredulously, squinting at him.

“I told you to stay in my room!” Penelope hissed

Eric stood there looking at her intently, only wearing a pair of black boxers, and his usually neat blonde hair bedraggled from sleep. Penelope’s color flooded back to her face as she looked back at Eric and then to Mia again.

“What is he doing here…?” Mia asked; her brow furrowing.

“Eric spent the night,” Penelope said quietly “but what’s more important is you. Are you ok?”

“I’m fine” Mia grumbled, sitting up straighter. “Since when are you two fucking?”

Penelope and Eric both chuckled awkwardly, Eric giving Penelope a sly grin.

“Turns out that little truth or dare date was better than we expected it to be” he said, running a hand through his hair.

“Wait— so _every_ date you’ve been on has been with him??” Mia asked, her mouth hanging open “ _He_ is who you have been sneaking off to see?”

“Yeah…” Penelope said sheepishly, sitting on the edge of the bed. 

“How did he get through the wards?” Mia lowered her voice so Eric couldn’t hear her.

“Since I brought him through he was able to enter— I was going to sneak him out before Remus got home”

“I can’t believe you would bring him here— a muggle— on the full moon, when we are supposed to be sealed in.” Mia’s tone was stern, almost angry.

“That’s why he stayed here, I didn’t want to leave you but I wanted to see him…” she said awkwardly.

Mia’s eyes moved back and forth between Penelope, and Eric, who stood in the doorway, brows knitted together as he observed the girls intently. 

“uhm, anyway— Can I get you something to help you sleep?” Penelope said, changing the subject.

“No I’ll get it” she muttered, pulling the covers back and standing up.

“Fuck, Mia!” Eric cried, the color draining from his face.

Mia’s heart began to pound—she forgot she wasn’t wearing pajama pants; she had kicked them off in the middle of the night when she got hot. Eric’s eyes were glued to her thighs, his eyes as large as saucers. She stood there in her panties and tank top, bearing 4 long scratch scars on her hips and thighs, with no way of explaining to a muggle as to what they were. His horrified stare made her feel ugly; her body defaced with such devastating marks.

“ _Shit_ " she swore under her breath, grabbing her pajama pants off the bedroom floor and put them on hastily, Eric still staring at her legs despite the scars now covered. 

“Is that what I felt at your dad’s wake?” he asked, his eyes bugging

“Eric, don’t…” Penelope said, putting a hand on his chest and trying to push him out of her room. 

Mia walked into her bathroom and began rummaging in the medicine cabinet, looking for the sleeping draught she kept in emergencies.

“Penny, I can’t just forget about her looking like she was mauled by a bear. Is that why she was ‘sick’ after her dad passed?” he mimed air quotations at the word sick. “Why was she screaming for someone to stop?” he demanded, holding his ground firmly. “Did the sugar daddy do this—”

Mia rounded on him, storming out of her bathroom and pushing him in the chest firmly. He stumbled backwards, Mia continuing to advance on him, shoving him towards Penelope’s bedroom.

“He isn’t my sugar daddy!” she hissed through gritted teeth. “Now get the fuck out of my room!”

Mia stomped back in to her room and slammed the door shut. She downed the sleeping draught in one gulp and crawled back in bed, anger seething. She felt everything fade as the sleeping draught kicked into effect, and she fell into a dreamless slumber.

* * *

The next morning, Penelope and Eric sat at the dining room table, both of them reading the muggle newspaper while they sipped on cups of coffee. The familiar crack of apparition sent a flood of dread through Penelope, and caused Eric to nearly jump out of his seat.

“WHAT THE FUCK!” Eric hollered, starting at Remus incredulously.

“Shit” Penelope and Remus both muttered under their breath, realizing he just apparated in front of a muggle.

“What’s going on?” he asked an edge to his voice as him and Eric locked eyes. “Where’s Mia?”

“Sleeping” Penelope said “she needed a sleeping draught last night— woke up screaming”

Eric looked at Penelope as if he had seen a ghost, his face drained of all color and his mouth hanging open slightly.

“And what’s _he_ doing here?” he asked with a sneer, talking about Eric as if he wasn’t sitting right in front of him. He walked into the kitchen and began pouring a cup of coffee.

“He spent the night. Anyway, we need to…” Penelope began 

Remus whipped around quicker than she could finish, anger flashing across his expression.

“What?!” he snapped, his eyes shooting daggers at Eric.

“WITH ME! Remus, with me” she said quickly, a blush creeping up her neck.

“Wait— what?” he said, narrowing his eyes and blinking at her in shock.

“How did you just appear here??” Eric squeaked; his voice almost an octave higher as his mouth continued to hang open.

“We’ll get to that in a minute.” Remus said flatly. “Now why on earth did he spend the night with you?” his attention turning back to Penelope.

“We’re, uhm… dating” she muttered, shifting uncomfortably.

“You’re… _what?_ ”

“Dating.” 

“I’ve only been gone 12 hours…” Remus whispered into his coffee cup, shaking his head in disbelief as he felt like the world he knew turned upside down. “Is this who you’ve been sneaking off to see?” his voice stern, almost fatherly.

Penelope nodded, looking between Remus and Eric awkwardly.

“I cannot believe that you would bring him here, last night of _all nights_ …” Remus said, seething with irritation as he restrained raising his voice.

“Ok, someone needs to tell me what the fuck is happening. How did he appear here? What the hell happened to Mia’s legs?” Eric interjected, looking at Penelope with a very puzzled expression.

“How did you— ” Remus hissed, slamming his coffee cup down, advancing on Eric.

“She got out of bed without pants on, it was an accident!” Penelope cried.

“If I find out you tried to get fresh with her last night….” Remus said to Eric, his voice low and dangerous as he pointed at him.

“ _Stop!_ ” Penelope hollered. “Remus, he saw you apparate— what are we supposed to do? He’s a muggle” 

“A what?” Eric scoffed, but was ignored.

“Well, if you are ‘dating’ like you say you are it was only a matter of time before you needed to tell him about you anyway. You might as well start from the beginning.” Remus said irritably, throwing his hands in the air.

“What the hell is he talking about?” Eric blinked at the two of them vacantly. “What about you, Penny?”

“Sit down, Eric; this is going to be a lot to take in.”

* * *

Mia walked out of the bedroom to find Remus, Eric and Penelope sitting at the table in silence. Eric looked pale, almost like he was going to be sick, and Remus his usual post-full moon sickly. Mia poured herself a cup of coffee, feeling uncomfortable by the silence.

“When did you get in?” Mia asked Remus, slinking into a chair next to him.

“Maybe a half hour ago; I apparated in to find Eric had spent the night here.” Remus said flatly.

“REMUS!” she hissed, her eyes widening.

“Yeah, we’re past that” Penelope said, looking at Eric, who remained looking like he was going to hurl.

“So… you can do magic too?” he asked her vacantly

“Fuck” she whispered, running her hand through her hair awkwardly. “Yeah, I can”

“Can one of you show me?” he asked, taking a sip of coffee.

Remus pulled his wand out and transfigured his coffee cup into a rat. The rat squeaked as Eric screamed like a small child. Remus sniggered, watching in satisfaction as Eric panicked over the rodent in front of him. Penelope shot him a disapproving glare, making him quickly transfigure the rat back to its original state.

“Remus, that wasn’t funny” Penelope snapped

“Yes, actually, it was” he said softly, taking a sip of his coffee with a smug smile.

He felt a small pang of triumph as he watched Eric stare at his cup wide eyed, his mouth ajar.

“What the fuck” Eric said under his breath. 

“Eric saw my scars last night” Mia said quietly, looking at Remus with uncertainty.

“Yeah, Penelope told me about your nightmare, I’m sorry I couldn’t’ve been there”

Mia shook her head to dismiss him, kissing him gently and ruffling his hair. “You look peaky, need a pain potion?”

“No, I’m alright” he said with a small smile.

“Why does he need a pain potion?” Eric asked “is that like Advil?”

“Full moon” Mia said casually

Eric blinked at her vacantly, scrunching his brows at Penelope for her to explain.

“You guys didn’t get into that yet…?” Mia asked slowly

“No, we only got as far as that there are witches and wizards, and that we’re some of them, and we went to school to do magic” Penelope said.

She chuckled, resting her chin on Remus’s shoulder as she wrapped her arms around him “You want to tell him about your furry little problem, or should I?”

“His what?” Eric asked

“I have a— well— a _condition_ that ails me once a month…” He began awkwardly.

“Oh don’t beat around the bush!” Mia said as she rolled her eyes, holding her hand up to silence him “Remus is a werewolf”

Eric silently stared at the three of them for a moment intently, until he burst out laughing.

“Ok, now you guys are just pulling my leg” he said between laughter “There’s no such thing”

“You muggles think that” Remus muttered darkly, sipping his coffee.

Eric continued laughing for a moment, but stopped when no one else was laughing with him.

“You’re not kidding… are you?” he said, eyeing Remus suspiciously.

“No, we’re not kidding” Penelope said softly.

Gears were turning in his brain as he processed the things they were saying. Werewolves, wizards, magic, this had to be either a sick trick, or he was dreaming. He figured dreaming, as he had no logical explanation as to how his cup turned into a rodent, and how Remus just appeared out of thin air in the middle of the flat. Yes, it must be a dream. He pinched himself, but alas, did not wake.

“Is that how you got those marks on your legs, some weird wolf bestiality shit?” Eric asked, cringing.

Mia and Remus burst out in laughter, Mia laughing so hard her sides hurt. “No, we’re not into ‘weird wolf bestiality shit’” she said, regaining composure. “Those marks did come from a werewolf, but not Remus.”

She took a breath and shifted her posture. “It’s a long story, but it starts with my dad. My dad didn’t die of a heart attack. He was murdered, by dark wizards….”

Mia told Eric about the Order, and relayed the events of her father’s death, and his memory modification. Eric looked utterly confused the entire time she spoke, having a hard time comprehending what she was saying.

“I don’t understand though, the General said he had a heart attack. I found him unconscious in his office...” Eric said

“Because that’s what yours and every muggle’s memory was modified to think. Think about it— He was 45 and in great shape, and there’s no heart disease in his family line. Curious, how he could’ve died of a heart attack, don’t you think?”

“Pre-existing heart condition?”

“He wouldn’t’ve been allowed to serve in the military if that was the case” Mia said simply.

“You’re right, that doesn’t add up.” He said softly, his brow furrowing. “But I found him, I remember!”

“Your memory was modified! You remember what the Ministry of Magic wanted you to remember!”

“Well, I want my memory back then; can you give it to me?”

“You don’t want it back, I assure you” Remus said 

“I don’t get it, I fucking _remember_ finding him” Eric said under his breath, going to take a sip of coffee that Penelope had freshly poured just a moment before, but hesitating, fearing it would turn back into a rat.

“Mia was planning on teaching me a new spell today, why don’t you stay and watch? I’ll be able to explain some more, help you make sense of… all this” Penelope said, taking Eric’s hand.

“Actually, I was thinking Remus should teach you the patronus charm” Mia said with a small smile, kissing his shoulder playfully. “He’s an excellent teacher.”

* * *

“Expecto Patronum!”

Penelope was irritated. She and Remus had been at it for over an hour, and she hadn’t gotten at least a single wisp to leave her wand. Eric sat on the couch and watched eagerly as Mia was curled up in the armchair adjacent, nose deep in her wandless magic books attempting to light a candle without her wand. Just as Penelope hadn’t had any luck with her patronus, Mia was unable to get the candle to light.

“Don’t beat yourself up; this is extremely complex magic…” Remus began

“What is supposed to happen?” Eric asked thickly.

“A silver mist should erupt from the end of her wand, however, if the spell is performed well enough, the silver mist will take on the form of an animal” Remus explained to him

“I can’t produce a corporeal patronus if I can’t even get a silver wisp!” she said, throwing her hands in her face. “And I can’t focus with Mia muttering ‘Incendio’ over and over!! Just use your damn wand like _everybody else!!_ ”

“Sorry…” Mia grumbled, snapping her book shut and rolling her eyes.

“Why don’t you take a break, you can’t focus on a happy memory if you are frustrated” Remus said, motioning for her to sit down.

Penelope plopped down on the couch, Eric putting his arm around her.

“What is this silver stuff supposed to do?” he asked Remus as he kissed Penelope’s forehead

“It’s supposed to repel dementors, a dark and dangerous creature that sucks out your soul” 

“That’s fucked up” he said under his breath. “Can both you and Mia do this spell?”

“Expecto Patronum” Mia and Remus said in unison, and two silver wolves erupted from their wands, leaping around the living room for a moment before dissipating.

“They make it look so easy!” Penelope cried irritably.

“Remus and I both have wolf patronuses, but Tonks’s patronus is a jack-rabbit.” Mia explained “everyone’s animals are different. I’ll be curious to see what Penny’s is”

“What is my patronus?” Eric asked

“You don’t have one, you’re a muggle”

“So what, you guys get cool animals and I don’t? I want one. Can mine be an eagle?”

“Sure, Eric, yours can be an eagle” Remus said sarcastically, rolling his eyes

“Fuck yeah!” he said, pumping his fist in the air, Penelope giggled at him.

Mia got up from the armchair and wrapped her arms around Remus’s torso playfully and kissed his shoulder.

“That was a good lesson, Professor Lupin” she said softly.

“I miss being called that” he said with a small smile.

“Do you?” She said, her brow raising

“I do, I really miss teaching”

“What else will you teach us today then, Professor Lupin?” She bit her lip mischievously, leaning in to speak into his ear. “Will you teach me how to suck cock, Professor Lupin?”

“Ok! Ok,” Remus jumped away from her, flushing a deep shade of scarlet. “Maybe I _don’t_ miss being called that”

Mia cackled manically as she walked into the kitchen for a glass of water. “Feel free to stop by my office hours anytime Miss Roswell” she called mockingly.

“MIA!” Remus growled as his flush turned from scarlet to plum “I’m sorry— she has a horrid sense of humor”

“Can we call it a sense of humor when we _actually_ shagged during your office hours?”

Eric looked to the three of them puzzled; Penelope blushed and gave him a sheepish smile, as she never told Eric how Mia and Remus met.

“Yes, Eric, if you are putting two and two together, I fucked my teacher” Mia said with a wry smile “Let’s all take a moment to thank our dear Head Boy, Percy Weasley, for being a fucking wanker and giving me detention with _Professor Lupin_ here” She gestured to Remus with a grandiose bow, snickering.

“I didn’t know he was your guys’ teacher!” Eric whispered to Penelope “is that why he doesn’t teach anymore?”

“I can hear you, you know” Remus said flatly. “I don’t teach anymore because it got out that I was a werewolf—parents wouldn’t want someone like me teaching their kids, so I resigned.”

“Did you sleep with him too?” Eric asked Penelope, his face twisting.

“No, ohmygod no!” Penelope cried, her nose crinkling at him

“It was only Mia” Remus sighed heavily “After it happened the first time, I had no intention of it happening again— it was an impulse mistake”

“But I had _every_ intention of it happening again” Mia said slyly, wrapping her arms around him again “and I’m a woman who gets what she wants”

“I was weak, what can I say” he chuckled softly.

“We kept our office hour fuck sessions on the down low” Mia said to Eric “Penelope didn’t even know until after we graduated”

“Yeah, thanks for not trusting me by the way” She added snottily

“Uh, Miss perfect Prefect and girlfriend of the biggest wanker ever? Yeah, sorry, you were way too pretentious back then; you would’ve went straight to Dumbledore and you know it”

Penelope gave a guilty expression, knowing she probably would’ve turned Remus in had she found out what he was doing with a student behind closed doors

“I wouldn’t’ve blamed you, we broke a lot of rules doing what we did” Remus said to Penelope quietly.

“I knew there was more to you guys” Eric laughed “had any of what I’ve learned in the past 12 hours came up in my research, I’m not sure what if I could’ve made sense of it all”

“Research??” Penelope said puzzled.

Eric turned slightly pink and shrugged “well, yeah, I was looking into Remus for a while and I…”

“What??” Penelope asked, crinkling her nose.

“He was investigating Remus after Christmas, but couldn’t find any information on him because he wasn’t part of the muggle world. I told him back off” Mia said

“You didn’t tell me that…” Remus whispered to Mia, his tone sharp and irritated.

“I thought he was faking his identity or something…” Eric chuckled awkwardly as he ran a hand through his hair “When I hit a dead end with him, I started looking into the rest of you guys”

“The rest of us?” Penelope asked, her face twisting more and more by the second.

“Yeah, you, Mia, that Tonks chick; I don’t actually know her first name— something weird— but the only Tonks I found a record of was a Ted Tonks…”

“That’s her father, who is muggle-born” Remus said, eyeing Eric intently.

“So what did you learn about me in this investigation?” Penelope asked, her tone a little pointed.

“Just basic stuff, your full name, birthdate, place of birth, parent’s names and that you work at the wine and cheese shop…”

“All the stuff you pretended not to know about me” Penelope stiffened, she began to feel extremely uncomfortable. “Did you agree to go out with me so you could get more information on all of us? To get closer to her?”

“Well, er- when you called me and asked I saw it as an opportunity…” Eric began

“So you’ve been seeing me this whole time to closer to her? To learn all of our secrets?”

“No— I had a really good time with you that night and we had a ton in common…”

“And you figured if you got me into bed then I’d start spilling all Mia’s secrets, so you could ‘figure out’ what is was you were looking for by investigating us" She mimed air quotations around the phrase ‘figure out’, then put her hands on her hips, shooting daggers from her eyes.

“No, that’s not fair— Come on— _you_ only asked _me_ out because Tonks dared you too!!”

“But _I_ didn’t have ulterior motives! It was an innocent date on a Friday night, even if I thought it would be strictly platonic! You’ve been playing me to get to Mia, using me for your— your— _sick agenda!_ ”

“No Penelope— it’s not like that now, I swear”

“Get out.”

“Come on—“

“GET OUT!” she roared, tears now streaming down her face.

Remus and Mia felt as if they were now intruders on a very personal conversation, both of them slinking off to the side of the room, wishing to not be flies on the wall at this moment.

“Penny, please— just listen to me…”

“ _Get. Out._ ” Penelope whispered dangerously, her voice wavering and nostrils flaring “Eric so help me, if you are not out of this flat in 5 seconds…”

She pulled her wand and pointed it at Eric, who jumped off the couch with his hands in the air.

“Can I just explain?” he cried, looking to her wand in terror.

“OUT!!!!” she screamed, sending a flash of pink right past his head, singeing the wall behind him.

Eric took off running for the door, grabbing his shoes and throwing the door open as Penelope’s jets of pink light missed him by inches each time. The front door slammed shut as Penelope began to shake and sob into her hands.

“Penny…” Mia started, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t touch me!” she snarled, ripping her shoulder from Mia’s grasp and storming into her bedroom. “Of course I would come in second compared to you!”

The door slammed shut, making all the photo frames and décor on the walls rattle. The tension in the room was awful as Mia and Remus looked at each other awkwardly, unsure of how to proceed from here.

* * *

Mia knocked softly on Penelope’s door, pressing her ear against it to see if she could hear inside. A cup of chamomile tea— a peace offering— was in her hand, steam rolling off the top as the cup warmed her palm.

“Penny, can I come in?” She called softly

“sure” Penelope muttered, her response muffled by the door in between them.

Mia and Remus entered to find Penelope sitting on her bed, eyes puffy and bloodshot, hugging her pillow. She had a pile of used tissues next to her, neatly gathered together in a small heap.

“I brought you some tea— chamomile, with some honey” Mia said sweetly.

“Thanks” she grumbled, outstretching her hand to accept the piping hot cup.

Mia sat on the edge of the bed as Remus remained standing, leaning back against the dresser. There was a moment of silence between them as Penelope stared at her decimated tissue mountain.

“So, you got pretty upset with him” Mia started, breaking the silence.

“I can’t believe I trusted him” Penelope sniffed “I should’ve known he was using me to get to you”

“Are you sure he was?” Mia asked “He seemed to be trying to say once he got to know you he liked you more”

“He was _investigating_ us!” she hissed “I bet he figured if he got close enough I’d start letting him spend the night here, and he’d be able to spy on us more closely”

“Well, I never did like the little shit…” Remus muttered 

Mia shot him a warning look to shut him up, which worked. He raised his hands apologetically and stopped speaking.

“You must’ve really liked him to be as upset as you are” Mia said gently “I haven’t seen you this torn up since Percy”

“Fuck Percy” Penelope whispered, wiping her eyes roughly.

“Yeah, fuck Percy!” Mia agreed with a cynical grin “He was a pretentious git— you were way too good for him.”

“He thought opposite— thought our relationship would hold back his career” she muttered with a sniffle.

“It’s his loss” Remus said gently.

“You were different with him, Penny. I couldn’t talk to you because I didn’t think I was confiding in my best friend anymore, so I stopped talking to you about things.” Mia said “Percy breaking up with you was the best thing for you; because you became much more of yourself again once his influence was gone”

Penelope sniffed and nodded, she had most certainly gotten caught up in the ‘being a Prefect is the highest honor’ mentality during her days of being Percy Weasley’s girlfriend. She had always been the responsible, sensible one, but never snobbish about it until she started dating him.

"But Percy is old news; we need to talk about Eric.” Mia said. 

Penelope nodded, rubbing her eyes as she blinked away a few tears. 

“Eric and I had a really great first date. We got to talking about our aspirations for travelling the world, he told me all about his engineering degree— that he wants to specialize in bridges and roadway design when he gets out of the Air Force, and he loves movies just as much as I do…”

She chuckled slightly as Mia shifted to sit next to her, putting her arm around her.

“He seemed so attentive, it was nice to have someone pay attention to me, and I haven’t felt that in a long time.” She said as her voice wavered “After Percy broke up with me, I was so lonely. I didn’t really talk about it because you were so happy Remus and you were getting back together, but it was really hard for me—for months.”

“Oh Penny, I didn’t realize…” Mia said, feeling guilty that her happiness of getting Remus back the winter after they graduated might’ve been a slap in the face for Penelope.

“It’s ok” she said “Sirius and I were both lonely people, us writing to each other helped a lot. We wrote each other at least twice a week, if not more”

“I know, Frankie would come in the window with a letter and you’d get all flush faced and stupid over it.” Mia jeered “Running into your room to read your dirty letters”

“They weren’t all dirty!” she cried, giggling slightly. “But then— he died.” 

The room fell silent for a moment as they all thought of Sirius, all three of them missing their friend terribly.

“I was lonely again, after that. You had shut down completely, half starving yourself to death as you pushed everyone out” Penelope said “Remus had no one to talk to, so I let him lean on me”

“Thank you for that, Penny— It meant a great deal to me” he said softy, with a small apologetic smile

“Of course” she sniffed, nodding to him “but I didn’t have anyone to talk to, and I felt so alone”

“You could’ve leaned back on me” Remus offered. “You know I am here for you”

“I know, but you had your hands full with her” she insisted, gesturing to Mia.

“I’m sorry” Mia whispered, wiping a stray tear from her cheek.

“I know, I forgive you” Penelope said “So when I thought Eric could be someone I could be with, I didn’t feel lonely anymore, I really took to him”

“Do you love him?” 

“It’s too soon to say that— was too soon” she said as she began to fidget with one of her used tissues “I think I could’ve though”

Mia nodded, pulling her friend closer to her. “Why did you say you always come in second to me?”

“Because I do” Penelope sniffled “I guess there’s always been a part of me that’s been envious of you; your looks, your grades, your personality— I mean, pretty much all the guys liked you at school,”

“Not Percy Weasley” Mia teased

“No, Percy hated you” Penelope chuckled “but everyone else liked you— you were nearly 40 slots ahead of me on Trevor’s hot list”

“Fuck Trevor Greentree— I wish I’d knocked his teeth out!” Mia spat, throwing her hands in the air “and fuck that list, it was bullshit”

“The hot list?” Remus asked; his brow furrowing.

“It was this stupid list that Trevor Greentree made in our 4th year, it ranked the 58 girls in our year by hottest to ‘nottest’” Mia explained.

“Mia was 4th” Penelope grumbled “I was 47th”

“and I told you then and I say it now, the only reason he put you so low was because Michael Bobbitt was pissed you wouldn’t let him feel under your shirt in the broom closet, and he asked Trevor to move you lower on the list to upset you” Mia said “You were way hotter than Rachel Goldstein, and she was 17th, or whatever”

“I mean, her nose _was_ largely proportioned for her face…” Penelope said with a small laugh.

“Penny, I was always jealous of you” Mia said with a smirk “Prefect, the perfect logical Ravenclaw, had a real boyfriend first”

“You had boyfriends!” Penelope interjected “Scott Tisdale, Evan Smith, Brogan Murphy…”

“All of whom I ‘dated’ maybe three months a piece, the sex sucked, and they really only wanted to call me their girlfriend because of Trevor’s stupid list” Mia said flatly. “Percy and you loved each other— it was disgusting, watching the two of you snog by the lake as I studied”

Penelope laughed and gave her a guilty smile “we needed you to keep watch for Flitwick or McGonagall…”

“Yeah, I think I’m permanently scarred by those experiences, thanks” Mia teased. “Can I take a page out of Penelope Clearwater’s book for a moment?”

“Sure”

“I think you should talk to Eric. Hear his side, and then make an educated decision once you have the full story.”

“That is a very ‘me’ thing to say” Penelope muttered with a small smile.

“Yes, Helen slings that same bullshit at me weekly—‘talk about your feelings’ ‘talk it out’” Mia teased, using a mocking tone as she imitated her counselor “But it has yet to fail me”

“I’m not ready yet— to talk to him” Penelope sniffled “I need time”

“Take your time” Mia smiled, giving her friend a tight hug.

“Well, if you ask me, I think he’s a cocky little wanker that needs his ass handed to him…” Remus started

“Remus!” Mia hissed, glaring at him “We didn't ask”

Remus rolled his eyes and sighed loudly, averting his gaze to the window to his left.

“He’ll come ‘round” Mia whispered, gesturing slightly with her head in Remus’s direction. “Come on, you want to watch a movie? We can send Remus out for some cheesecake”

“Alright” she whispered, a hint of a smile creeping across her face “I want a pizza too”

“You heard the woman, Moony— pizza and cheesecake”

“I can do that” He nodded

Mia hopped off the bed, smiling at Penelope “alright— get yourself cleaned up, you’re covered in mascara smears.”

She took Remus’s hand and made to exit the room.

“I’m sorry!” Penelope called “for snapping at you…”

Mia turned back and rolled her eyes playfully “Shut up— don’t think on it for another second” 


	44. chapter 44

“Incendio… incendio… _goddammit_ — incendio!” 

A few weeks of burying her head in the library books on wandless magic had so far been a waste of time. Mia spent many exhaustive hours trying to light a candle unaided; frustrated that she couldn’t get even a small spark. 

At least there really hadn’t been much else to do; things were quiet with the Order, and she’d been working full time at the Ministry and carrying on part time at the Clearwater’s wine and cheese shop. Penelope had been working seven days a week in an attempt to distract herself from Eric, gone from the flat every time he called begging Mia and Remus (whoever answered the telephone) to have her call him back. 

Mia was usually too tired to gallivant around London with Remus in the evenings (thanks to her 6-day work weeks), so they spent their nights on the couch, her head in his lap as she studied her books while he flipped through various muggle television programs. He would stroke her hair and feed her popcorn as he encouraged her to keep studying, despite the annoyance of hearing the incantation ‘Incendio’ 500 times an hour.

No matter what she seemed to do or how much reading she did, the stupid candle wouldn’t light. She was beyond frustrated; she could transfigure her wand easily, but couldn’t make a simple flame? She wondered just how awful at magic she was?

“You getting frustrated won’t help— take a break” Remus called to her from the kitchen

“No, what doesn’t help is the fact that this stupid candle doesn’t light!” Mia growled as she snapped her book shut “I can do it with my wand just fine!”

“Because you _learned_ ” he said as he brought her a steaming cup of earl grey tea. “Drink some of this”

“I don’t want any tea right now” she snapped.

“Just relax, take the tea and drink it— I’m going to try to help you get it to light” he said calmly.

She huffed grumpily, but accepted the steaming cup. Her tongue was scorched as she took her first sip, forgetting just how hot Remus always made his tea. Despite her taste buds reduced to char, she began to relax as she consumed the rest of the earl grey, and he massaged her feet. 

“You magical man...” she crooned, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths. “I don’t deserve you”

She praised him over and over as rubbed the soles of her feet— He always knew how to calm her down when her irritation was at its highest.

“Let’s try giving you something to focus on, maybe a memory just like when we cast a patronus?” Remus suggested “A memory where you felt your palms tingle—something with adrenaline, or anger”

“Yeah, because my favorite things to think about are death, Dolohov and Greyback” she muttered.

“Let’s just try it— let’s use the night Greyback came to Diagon Alley. Come sit here—” 

He motioned for her to sit on the floor around the coffee table, placing the candle in front of her. He sat across for her, taking a sip of his own tea.

“Alright, now close your eyes” he spoke softly, his voice soothing to her. “I want you to think about the conversation you had with him— how you felt, how the scene smelled and the sounds you could hear. Transport yourself back into that moment as if you are living it right now”

“I’d really prefer not to…” she said with a snicker.

“Do you want the damn candle to light?” Remus said with wry smile “Humor me— just try it”

She rolled her eyes, closing her eyes and huffing “fine, fine, I’ll try”

She focused with all her brain power on that night; the feeling of the brick wall against her back, the sound of her own heartbeat in her ears, the feeling of his wand pushing against her throat and his rough hand on her face, even his stale stench that resembled a homeless bum. She focused on how her body felt in that moment, recalling the awareness of adrenaline and fear surging through her. The memory was so strong in her mind she felt goosebumps under her clothes.

“Now, light the candle” Remus said softly.

With her eyes closed and her brain still focusing on feeling of that moment, she raised her right hand and waved it lightly, speaking just above a whisper.

“Incendio”

She waited a moment to open her eyes, her heart fluttering when she looked down at the candle in front of her. A small flame was flickering gently, the lemongrass candle beginning to give off its crisp aroma now that the wax was subject to fire. She looked up to see Remus beaming proudly at her, smiling a wide, toothy smile.

“You, Mia Roswell, are one talented witch”

* * *

“You’ve got to be kidding me…” Kingsley growled as he picked up his wailing infant son “there’s no way— that’ll the _third one_ this afternoon…”

He sniffed the baby, cringing as he confirmed his suspicions.

“Dora!— I think Reggie needs his diaper changed!” Kingsley called over the sound of the infant crying.

“I’m busy, can you do it please?” she hollered from the bedroom.

He swore under his breath as he looked to Remus and Arthur pleadingly. He hadn’t had to change one of Reggie’s diapers yet; they had a revolving door of members of the Order coming by to help, so between the various experienced parents of the organization, he had gotten off easy in the diaper department. Molly, Arthur, Remus and Mia had all came by this afternoon, the ladies assisting Tonks with unpacking some belated baby gifts in the nursery while the men were left to tend to the newborn.

“I think this is a job for his godfather—”

Kingsley attempted to hand off Reggie to Remus, who just laughed as he shook his head and held his hands up in protest.

“No, no, _you_ got her pregnant, _you_ change the diaper” 

“I don’t know how! I haven’t had to do one yet!” Kingsley exclaimed “Come on— Arthur, how about you? You have kids— help me out?”

“I don’t think I even remember how; Ginny is 15, after all.” Arthur chuckled as he scratched his balding head.

“Shit” he muttered “well, this can’t be too hard, right??”

Kingsley laid Reggie on his back, shushing him as he un-wrapped his diaper. The men all plugged their noses and gasped at the sight of Reggie’s decimated diaper.

“This kid is on an all liquid diet, how is… _that_ possible!” Kingsley growled

It took Kingsley nearly 10 minutes to change Reggie, struggling to get the diaper on correctly and resulting to using sticking charms to hold it together. Remus and Arthur sat back and watched him struggle, giving Kingsley false words of encouragement. Molly heard the commotion from the men and the baby in the living room and came out to check on them. She scowled at them when she saw the state of Reggie’s diaper.

“Oh, honestly— it’s not that hard!” she scolded them “oh you poor thing— don’t worry, Auntie Molly will fix you right up”

Molly took 10 seconds to fix Reggie’s diaper, for which he still cried. 

“He probably needs a bottle” Molly said, 

She shuffled to the kitchen to prepare one, clanking nosily in the cabinets as Kingsley called to her.

“He just had one an hour ago, Molly” 

“Well, he probably needs another one”

Molly shoved the bottle in his hands, then picked Reggie up and handed him to him. Her demeanor softened when she saw an overwhelmed expression on Kingsley’s usually stately face.

“Kingsley, you are doing fine. Babies are a lot of work, but you will get the hang of it.” Molly said gently.

She patted him on the shoulder before retreating back to the nursery, leaving Kingsley to awkwardly fumble with the bottle as he attempted to adjust Reggie in his arms. Remus looked at him curiously, feeling an overwhelming urge to hold the infant.

“Can I hold him?” Remus asked

“Yeah, absolutely”

Remus supported the baby’s head in the crook of his elbow, resting his body in his lap. 

“Hey, buddy” Remus whispered “I’m your Uncle Remus”

He watched as Reggie drank his bottle, his eyes glazing over as he was falling asleep eating. Remus smiled; he had always assumed he wouldn't be able to have a family of his own thanks to his furry little problem, so he was honored to be the godfather of such a pure, innocent soul.

* * *

A troll-sized latte with three shots of espresso was getting Mia through her shift— courtesy of Calista Calderon’s coffee shop. Three months of working 6 days in a row (the Ministry through the week and then the wine and cheese shop on Saturdays) was beginning to take a toll on her. Remus had insisted she needed to cut the wine and cheese shop from her schedule, but she didn’t want to leave Penelope in a pinch on the weekends. She had been thinking of taking some time off, taking a week for just him and her at the cottage, but the thought of asking Delphinus Gamal for an entire week off when she had only just met her 90-day mark as an intern seemed like that might be asking too much. She craved a break, wishing to return to the days where they had spent their mornings kayaking and swimming on the lake, and their evenings between his sheets. Life was good then— some of the best times she could think of had been when she, Sirius and Remus holed up at the cottage, before the looming threat of Death Eaters and Voldemort seemed as scary as it did now.

Mia wasn’t the only one drinking her 36oz of over-caffeinated java; Penelope had a cup just as large. They sipped their lattes periodically as they stocked champagne bottles, both feeling over-worked and under-rested. Since Penelope’s split from Eric, she was ‘channeling her inner Susan Roswell’, as Mia told her, by overworking herself to distract her from her feelings.

The doorbell clanged as a breeze flowed through the shop, making Penelope and Mia turn their attention to the customer at the door.

“Hi, can we help you find…” 

Penelope stopped in mid-sentence, her voice catching in her throat as she saw Eric standing on the front rug, holding a bouquet of purple and white flowers. Mia smiled at him as she put her hand on Penelope’s shoulder, giving her a reassuring squeeze.

“Hey” he said, giving her a small smile “can we talk? Somewhere private?”

“What do you want?”

She crossed her arms, clenching her jaw slightly as she stared at him. 

“To talk” he repeated

“Anything you have to say to me you can say in front of Mia” she said snottily.

He sighed as he looked down at the flowers in his hand, nodding after a moment of silence.

“Penelope…” he started, taking a few steps inward and raking a hand through his spiked blonde hair. “I know you’re still upset…”

“Yeah, no shit” 

“Just let me explain— I wasn’t using you!”

“Mhmm” She hummed, rolling her eyes.

“Yes, I had looked into you when I was looking into Remus and Mia; I already knew your full name, your parents’ names, your birthday, address, hell— I even knew what hospital you were born at”

Penelope glared at him, shifting her weight as she huffed.

“Yes, I was hoping that you would let some little detail slip that Remus was a woman beater or something incriminating, because I wanted him out of the picture.”

“Yeah, because you were using me the whole time to get to her!”

She gestured to Mia, then grabbed a few champagne bottles out of the case and began searing for their place on the shelf.

“No— my interests changed after we had dinner” he said calmly “I was honest when I said I had been hoping you were playing wingman for her, but once you and I got to talking, I realized how much you and I had in common”

Penelope rolled her eyes, but not taking her eyes off her work. Mia leaned back against the wall behind the register counter, feeling like an awkward fly on the wall for a very personal conversation.

“I can’t stop thinking about you. You are the only one that has been on my mind since I walked you home that night.” Eric took a few steps towards her, clutching the bouquet in his hands to keep them from shaking. “I don’t know how I never saw it all along—how I wasn’t immediately captivated with you the very first time I met you”

“Because you were trying to get with her”

Her head whipped around to glare at him, jealousy and fury burning in her bright blue eyes.

“Yes, I was” He breathed “But the moment I learned just a small fraction of who you were, I forgot all about her. Everything about you is perfect; Your laugh, your smile— and come on, any girl that enjoys watching Caddyshack just as much as I do is a keeper.” He added with a cautious laugh.

Penelope shifted her weight and bit her lip as she tried not to smile at the mention of one of her favorite movies.

“I know we only were seeing each other for a few months, but I have felt things for you that I haven’t felt about anyone before. This can’t be it, we can’t be over— I need more of you.” 

“And what about what I need?” she asked with a huff.

“You need someone you can trust, someone who will stand by you and support you.” 

“How do I know I can trust you? That you aren’t just messing me to get more information on her?”

“You don’t” he said simply. “You have to take me at my word”

Penelope furrowed her brow at him. “But I don’t trust you— you lied to me”

“I didn’t lie— I have never lied to you.” Eric said softly “I omitted details”

Penelope scowled at him again as he took a step forward towards her.

“Here’s the story: When I felt scarring on Mia’s leg that she freaked out over, I was certain Remus had a hand in it. I began looking into him, and when the only paperwork I could find on him was an ID obtained not too long before, I thought he might’ve assumed a new identity. Something seemed off, so I began to look into those closest to him. You and Mia I found a lot more records of, but I found it odd that there was no school records for either of you from age 11 and up, yet both of you had received equivalency diplomas. It was suspicious to me” he ran a hand through his hair awkwardly as Penelope continued to stare him up and down. “When you called me and asked me out, I figured I’d get you drunk, and you’d say something that would put the pieces together. I’d finally have the detail that proved Remus wasn’t who he said he was, and I could bring him down.”

Mia began chewing at her bottom lip as she listened to Eric, hoping he would make his point to help himself in Penelope’s mind.

“I let you order glasses of wine and made idle conversation, asking you about yourself and your life, fishing for details— until I got distracted. I laid in bed that night thinking about how cool you were. I woke up the next morning wanting to see you again. I did not lie, just didn’t mention I had looked into you guys—but now you know the whole story.”

“You just forgot about her that quickly? One dinner with me and you moved on?”

Penelope’s tone was incredulous. She threw her hands in the air as she spoke, Mia surprised she hadn’t chucked a champagne bottle at Eric’s head yet.

“You were very certain that Remus didn’t hit her, and well, yeah— I realized that I wanted to focus my energy on you rather than her.”

Eric shrugged awkwardly, flashing Penelope a handsome smile in hopes that it would soften her mood, but alas, did not. Her face and neck began to look red and patchy, a tell-tale sign that she was about to start crying. Mia had seen Penelope turn blotchy every time she tried to hold back tears over their years at school.

“I can’t do anything without thinking about you. I think about you before I sleep, when I wake, and many moments in between. I feel lost, these last few weeks without you have been lonelier than I could’ve imagined.”

Penelope let a few tears escape, wiping her face furiously as she cast her eyes downward.

“I need you— Take me back, please, and I promise to never hurt you again”

Eric smiled weakly, stepping close to her and rocking on his heels.

“I am not a proud man, Penelope— I will get on my knees and beg if I have to”

She looked to him with tears swimming in her eyes “Purple is my favorite color” she said thickly, unable to form any other sentence.

Eric chuckled “I know that’s why I got these” he stepped even closer to her, cupping her cheek with his hand and stroking softly with his thumb. “Please, take me back”

Penelope let out a sob and kissed him firmly. She threw her arms around him and crushed the flowers between them. He threw the squished bouquet aside and snaked his hands into her hair as they kissed passionately. Mia looked away awkwardly, feeling more awkward to be intruding on their kiss more so than she had listening to their conversation. She coughed after a minute of them snogging, reminding them they were not alone.

“Sorry…” Penelope said sheepishly, turning back to Mia.

“It’s alright— why don’t you two lovebirds go get a drink or something? I can manage here”

“You sure? I don’t want to leave you by yourself…” 

“Nah I’m good, we close in 45 minutes and we haven’t seen a customer in an hour. I can finish the stock and close up” She said with a grin “Go— you guys should go talk and enjoy yourselves, I’ll see you at home tonight”

Penelope and Eric smiled at each other. “I don’t know about you, but I could use a milkshake” he said

“I’ll go get my purse” she said as she shuffled off to the manager’s office. 

Mia grinned and punched Eric lightly on the arm “She _really_ likes you, you know”

Eric chuckled softly “I meant everything I said… she is amazing”

“She is— and you better make good on that promise not to hurt her, or I’ll have to hurt you. I know a killer slug vomiting jinx”

Eric laughed nervously as Penelope reemerged, purse and sweater in hand.

“We’ll be at the burger place a few blocks up if you need anything— the one with the milkshakes” She said as she hugged her friend “Thanks, Mia”

“Of course” Mia said, then pressed her lips close to Penelope’s ear, to whisper so that Eric couldn’t hear “besides— makeup sex is the best sex”

Penelope blushed scarlet as they broke their embrace, she taking Eric’s arm as he led her out of the shop. Mia watched them cross the street and turn the corner out of sight. She couldn’t help but smile as she finished stocking the shelves, feeling much joy for her friend. 

She bustled around the shop, checking the clock every few minutes to see when she could lock the doors. She counted the cash register, sweating profusely when the count off, counting it again to find her error. 

“Thank merlin” she muttered under her breath.

She bank faced the cash in the drawer, and then trotted back to the safe to lock away the till. As she walked back up front, she grabbed the front door key off the counter as she looked over her closing checklist. She leaned against the wall as she read what closing duties she had completed when a man across the street through the front windows caught her eye. She didn’t pay him mind the first glimpse she saw of him in her peripherals, but only to look up from the clipboard, then down, then up again sharply when she recognized the person standing on the other side of the street. Fenrir Greyback stood completely still on the sidewalk, his head cocked to one side ever so slightly as his sinister grin sent shivers down Mia’s spine, his eyes burning into hers. 

She dropped to the floor behind the counter and pulled out her wand, her body trembling as she feared the werewolf might’ve been watching her for longer than she realized. She slowly peeked above the counter, to see Fenrir hadn’t moved, and was still staring at her. She darted back below, whispering swear words and feeling her fight or flight senses kicking in. She peeked again, he was in the middle of the street now, in the road median, cars honking as they whizzed past him. Back below the counter she went again, clutching her wand so tight her hand was beginning to feel numb. _If he comes through that door, you need to fight._ She told herself, gritting her teeth _the moment that door opens, stun him— time to not be afraid._

It seemed like ages, and a mere second simultaneously when Mia heard the bell of the front door chime. She jumped up quick, not even looking at her target as she pointed her wand and screamed “Stupify!”

A large crash and sound of glass breaking echoed in the shop, Mia squeezed her eyes shut, knowing she just sent Fenrir flying into a shelf full of wine bottles. She took a few deep breaths as she trembled before opening her eyes, horrified to find not Fenrir lying stunned amongst a pile of broken wine bottles, but Remus instead.

“Remus!— oh shit, I’m sorry— _shit!_ ”

She ran to his side as he tried to sit up, groaning in pain. 

“What are you doing here? Did I hurt you— _shit_ I just broke a small fortune.”

She helped him sit up, looking for cuts and scrapes as she brushed off his robes, soaking wet with merlot as he sat amongst the shards of glass.

“My wrist vibrated” he said, his voice constricted from having the wind knocked out of him. “I didn’t expect you to know of any danger in a muggle neighborhood— who were you expecting to stun?”

“Greyback” she said softly.

His eyes locked with hers “Greyback? Here?”

“Across the street; He was looking at me, watching me”

“Where is Penelope?”

“With Eric, at the burger place up the street— I sent her off an hour ago.”

“Fuck, he’s back?” he grumbled, rolling his eyes “regardless, you shouldn’t’ve been alone”

“I am alone here all the time; it’s never been an issue before” she said as she started siphoning the wine away with her wand. “I don’t understand— why he was here, in muggle London?”

He sighed heavily, treating her question as rhetorical.

“Do what you need to do to lock up— then I’d like to go find Penelope.”

 

Remus and Mia walked into the restaurant, receiving strange looks from the serving staff at Remus’s wine stained clothing. Eric and Penelope were situated in a horseshoe shaped booth in the corner, sitting closely and drinking a milkshake from two straws, both laughing and smiling with each other. Both of their faces fell when they saw Mia’s fear stricken face, looking over her shoulder every other step, and Remus, covered in wine and limping slightly.

“What on earth…” Penelope said, her brow furrowing

“You shouldn’t’ve left her alone!” Remus pointed at Penelope, scowling. “Greyback was watching her, through the windows— scooch over” 

“What??” Penelope gasped “Mia, are you alright??”

He motioned for Penelope and Eric to make room for them in the large horseshoe booth. Remus held his arm out to gesture Mia into the booth. He slid in after her, putting a hand on her thigh reassuringly.

“Yeah” she said, looking back towards the door of the restaurant “He was across the street, just watching. I hid behind the counter, and when I heard the doorbell chime, I shot a stunning spell before I saw it was just Remus— broke a bunch of reds”

“Did you see him??” Penelope asked Remus, eyes widening with fear

“No, I had no idea, I just felt my wrist vibrate so I apparated to the shop at once.” He said, then turning and giving Mia a small smile “It was a fantastic stun, by the way”

Mia didn’t answer, as she was too busy looking to the restaurant entrance and picking her fingernails, her chest in a knot.

“Wotcher, what can I get you two to drink?” a server said as she was trotting by, observing Remus’s clothes intently.

“Nothing, we’re just stopping by” he said flatly.

His tone came across a little rude to the server, as she rolled her eyes and walked away hastily.

“How many bottles did you break?” Penelope asked, cringing.

“A lot…” Remus said, “40 bottles maybe”

“Fuck” Penelope whispered, “Dad is going to kill me”

“You can’t go back to work there” Remus said to Mia, “He’s obviously following you”

“That’s my job, I just can’t quit!” Mia said

“You have the Ministry, at least there I know you are safe and aren’t left alone”

“I’m sorry we left, we shouldn’t’ve… “ Penelope started

“No, you _shouldn’t’ve!_ ” Remus snapped, his nostril flaring.

“STOP!” Mia hissed, a little too loudly as a few other patrons in the restaurant looked around at them. “Remus, don’t blame Penelope, and I am not quitting the wine and cheese shop.”

Remus and Penelope exchanged looks as there was an awkward pause.

“What can we do to stop him from coming around?” Eric asked breaking the silence. “Should we kill him?”

“Our side doesn’t kill unless absolutely necessary” Remus said heavily. “As much as I would like to kill him, that would make me just as bad as him”

“So there’s nothing? Come on, you guys have magic— there’s gotta be something!”

“Well there is _something…_ ” Mia said softly.

She looked to Remus with uncertainty, wondering what his reaction would be to her suggestion. By the way his face twisted when he realized what she was proposing, her comment was not well received.

“No.” He said firmly “Absolutely not.”

“Remus…”

“No— this conversation is over, let’s go home.”

“Hear me out—”

“No— because I’m not doing it” He said dismissively “Let’s go”

Eric opened his mouth to speak, but Penelope shot him a warning look. Remus got up and held his hand out to help Mia out of the booth. They stared at each other, Mia not moving.

“Let’s go” he said, his tone much softer but still insistent.

Mia let out a huff as she turned back to Eric and Penelope. “I’ll see you guys at home— sorry about the bottles”

She scooched out of the booth, taking Remus’s hand and allowing him to nearly drag her out of the restaurant. When they were outside, he turned a corner with her to find a dumpster to apparate behind.

“We’re not even going to talk about it?” she asked irritably.

“Nope”

* * *

The argument over Mia taking a few weeks off from working at the wine and cheese shop was a victory for Remus. He insisted she take a step back from the shop, worried that Fenrir Greyback would come skulking around again, and would make it inside on his second attempt to stalk her.

Penelope was extremely irritated to have to find coverage for Mia’s shifts, but Remus insisted it was for Mia’s safety. He also selfishly wanted her to himself for a couple weekend— he missed her when she was gone all the time. With the extra free time she had gained, they spent it buried in her wandless magic books, trying to assist her in learning new spells unaided. She could light candles now with little effort, as well as perform some simple household cleaning charms. She even tried to duplicate her work files wandless— by the 27th ruined copy she was successful, and could now perform her job without even drawing her wand.

As much as Remus wanted Mia and the flat all to himself on the weekends, Eric had begun spending nearly every free moment he had there— including the weekends. It seemed as wherever Penelope was, ‘punk-ass airman douchebag’ (as Remus still called him) was as well. Mia didn’t seem bothered by him being there, but Remus still wasn’t much of a fan. He and Penelope had a disagreement when Remus suggested if Eric stayed over so much, he should pay rent. Penelope, not so nicely, reminded him that he did not pay rent to live there, and if he wanted a say in who she brought home to _her_ flat, that she would gladly accept a check from him for rent at the beginning of the month. He kept his mouth shut and his snide comments under his breath after that conversation.

They had watched Reggie overnight the previous night, and as much as Remus loved seeing his godson, between having a baby in the house and an unwanted extra roommate, he was feeling a little claustrophobic. He was ecstatic to hear Eric was whisking Penelope away for a few days to Spain— A weekend of just him and Mia was exactly what he needed.

“Are you guys excited for your weekend getaway?” Mia asked Penelope, taking a sip of her coffee.

“Yes, I’ve never been to Barcelona— I want to see everything” Penelope said, smiling a wide, toothy grin.

“It’s amazing how inexpensive it is to travel between European countries” Eric said, wrapping his arm around Penelope.

“Yeah, it’s cheaper for wizards” Mia winked “thank merlin for broomsticks”

“Yeah, well the rest of us can’t wash our underwear in a cauldron, so…” Eric teased.

Remus, Penelope and Mia all bust out laughing, making Reggie stir in his bassinet. Mia shushed them between giggles, not wanting to disturb the baby.

“Eric, we don’t wash our laundry in a cauldron….” Penelope snickered, lowering her voice.

“Well how am I supposed to know??”

“So what are you guys getting into this weekend?” Penelope asked Mia after their laughter had died down.

“I’ve got to take Reggie to Andromeda’s before work, she is watching him so Kingsley and Tonks can have a baby free weekend before returning to work on Monday— I also think I’m scribing for high court again today”

“So kissing up to Umbridge has gotten you far?” Remus said playfully.

“That woman sounds terrible” Penelope muttered

“Oh she is, she’s awful— I bought her a coffee mug with a cat on it, she ate that shit up” Mia laughed “So yeah, after work today, no idea— whatever Remus wants to do I guess”

Remus flashed a devilish grin— a heat burned between her thighs as she blushed; she could imagine what he was thinking by the way he had smiled at her. She coughed awkwardly, hoping Penelope and Eric didn’t pick up his facial expressions

“I’m sure the Prime Minister will be thrilled to be rid of my mum once Kingsley is back at work” she continued “He is terrified of her”

“Terrified because she’s a witch?” Eric asked, puzzled.

“Terrified because she is Susan Roswell” Remus smirked, sipping his coffee. “As he should be”

Eric chuckled “oh she can’t be that bad— John used to talk about how much of a ball breaker she was, but she was cool at his wake”

“That’s because you’ve never been on the receiving end of her fury” Remus laughed “She is a woman who gets what she wants”

Mia rolled her eyes at him as Reggie began to stir. She jumped up from the table and picked up the baby, shushing and bouncing him as she made her way to the kitchen for a bottle. Reggie began to cry as Mia fixed his bottle, but settled once he began eating.

“There, that’s it— Aunt Mia knows just what you need” she crooned, smiling down at the infant in her arms.

“He’s so cute— really starting to look like Kingsley, I think” Penelope said, brushing the baby’s hair gently.

“I think so, but something tells me he is going to be a troublemaker like Tonks” Mia smirked “Whatcha think, Remus— doesn’t he make you want one of our own?

Remus stiffened; his coffee cup held in front of him midair as he paused.

“I would love to be able to have a family…” he said quietly, setting his coffee cup down.

“We can have a family. 5 minutes of work is all it takes…” Mia said, playfully poking him in ribs and winking to Eric and Penelope.

“The chance that a child of mine would have my _condition_ …” His tone was very even, cold.

Mia chuckled and rolled her eyes “If we had a child and they were a werewolf, we would still love them regardless” 

The color drained from his face as he looked down at the table awkwardly. “To condemn a child to this life would be reprehensible” he muttered, his eyes darkening. “I cannot doom an innocent life to live with this curse, let alone a life with me as their father.”

He looked at little Reggie, so pure and innocent, nestled in Mia’s arms comfortably. He imagined a child of his own, such a small, sweet soul enduring a painful transformation once a month. It made him sick, it repulsed him. He repulsed himself. Eric and Penelope exchanged awkward glances, realizing they were now intruders on a very personal conversation.

“Remus, hey, what are you talking about? Where is your head right now?” Mia asked calmly, reaching up to brush his hair off his forehead.

He swatted her hand away, standing up hastily. “I can’t do it— I can’t let a child go through that” he said constricted, panic in his eyes.

He walked into Mia’s room and slammed the door shut, making the three of them jump. Reggie stopped drinking his bottle and began to cry, startled by the loud noise.

“Did I say something wrong?” she asked incredulously “shh, Reggie, its ok— Uncle Remus didn’t mean to scare you, shhhh”

They were all quiet for a couple minutes before Mia sighed, and then looked at the clock. “Shit, I’ve got to go”

She put Reggie down in his carrier, buckling him in snug for the journey to his grandparents.

“Take care of Frankie for me” Penelope said

“Nope, I’ll let your owl starve!” 

She walked out the front door, looking ridiculous with her arms full with the baby carrier, the diaper bag, and her purse. Penelope chuckled as Eric eyed the owl cages in the corner of the living room, the birds hooting softly at one another. 

“The whole owl mail thing is weird, how do they know how to find people?” he said

“They just do” Penelope shrugged 

“Well, what if I wanted a dragon to deliver my mail?”

“Dragons don’t deliver post, don’t be stupid”

* * *

Despite her getting sick and running out of the courtroom after the Wizengamot sentenced Jasper Hughes to ten years in Azkaban, Dolores Umbridge specifically asked for Mia to sub as a scribe for the court again today.

Mia originally thought being asked to scribe on a Friday would be a great way to end the week, but Delphinus threw a very monotone hissy-fit about how she needed Monday’s files duplicated and sorted before Mia left the Ministry that day. Much to her irritation by this, she agreed to take care of the files— it was her job after all. She finished work hours later than anticipated, the sun already setting by the time she was leaving the Ministry.

Mia apparated into the flat, thinking Remus would lecture her on not having someone escort her home this late in the evening, only to instead find him sitting in the armchair across from the off television set with a bottle of scotch, and all the lights off. The curtains were drawn; the only light present in the flat was the sunset peeking though the edge of the curtains. He was staring at the dark television, in complete silence, slowly sipping the scotch straight from the bottle.

“You want a light on?” she giggled

“No”

She hung her sweater on the coat rack by the door, feeling uncomfortable by his odd behavior. She was home almost 4 hours later than normal, no lecture? He seemed to not even notice what time it was— did he even receive her patronus telling him of her delay?

“You alright?” she asked carefully

“I’m fine”

She noticed that he had Reggie’s stuffed elephant in his other hand, realizing he must be upset about their conversation earlier.

“Remus… If you don’t want to have children, we don’t have to have them” she said gently

He didn’t answer, and after an awkward minute of staring at him, she went to make her way to the bedroom.

“It would be a shame.” 

She was half-way inside the bedroom when she turned back to him, looking at him sympathetically.

“To have children?” she asked softly

“To have someone like me as a father.”

“No, Remus…”

He held his hand up to silence her as he took a hearty swig of scotch, his gaze still fixed on the dark television set. Mia knew better than to press him in this moment, so she slipped into her bedroom quietly, not saying another word. She changed into pajamas and climbed into bed, not before peeking her head back out to see Remus still staring at the off television, slowly sipping the caramel colored liquid. She lay on her side, glancing at the clock that read 7:52. It was too early for sleep, but there was nothing else to do, she assuming he wanted to be alone. She stared at the wall for about an hour, until sleep took her by surprise.

* * *

_Evening, princess._

That horrible smile— that haunting, carnivorous expression stared back at her as she felt his wand at her throat and her body trembling.

_Don’t scream._

Mia woke up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, the ugly mug of Fenrir Greyback playing in tonight’s nightmare theater. She rolled over to find the bed empty and the clock reading 1:13. She felt her heart start to pound; _where is he?_

It wasn’t a full moon this night, so she knew he hadn’t gone off to the cottage or the Weasleys. She walked into the living room to find two empty bottles of scotch and Reggie’s stuffed elephant by the arm chair— but no Remus. She looked at her wrist, the smooth gold band still as stone, but was not reassured. It hadn’t vibrated at all that night; it would’ve woken her up if it had. She sat in the recliner, picking up a bottle of scotch and clutching it to her chest. 

_We only had two bottles here, if I were Remus and ran out of scotch, where would I go?_ She thought back to any of the times he had been in a mood like this, remembering the morning he disappeared after Penelope came to the cottage for their night of drunken debauchery. _Leaky Cauldron._

Mia ran into her bedroom and pulled on a pair of jeans that she found on the middle of the floor, and threw on a cardigan over her thin pajama camisole. She hastily splashed her face with water, and then threw her hair into a quick ponytail. She grabbed her wand and wallet, closed her eyes, and imagined the Leaky Cauldron.

Fresh air filled her lungs as she opened her eyes, standing in front of the little pub in Diagon Alley. The pub was busier than she expected for past one in the morning, the place was still about ¾ full with drunken witches and wizards having a jolly time. It was Friday night after all, she told herself as she scanned the pub over and over, Remus nowhere to be found. Mia walked up to the bar and waved the bartender, Tom over to her.

“Wotcher sweetie, whatcha’ drinking?” he said pleasantly

“Nothing actually, I’m looking for my boyfriend and wasn’t sure if he’d been here” she said, looking around one more time. “Remus Lupin?”

“Oh yeah, ol’ Remus was here! Drinkin’ a lot of scotch, I had to cut ‘im off. He seemed all tore up ‘bout somethin’. I told ‘im to go on home, but looks like he didn’t” 

“Any chance you know where he could’ve gone next?”

“The Screaming Chimaera down at the corner o’ Knockturn Alley will serve ya ‘til ya pass out, maybe try there?” Tom shrugged.

“Great” she grumbled; the Screaming Chimaera was the sketchiest wizarding bar she knew, and she instantly regretted not putting on a bra. “Thanks, Tom”

The Screaming Chimaera looks as inviting from the outside as the name made her feel. She was at least thankful she only had to go one store front into Knockturn alley to this shady little joint. The crumbling brick building looked as if one good push would do it over, she figuring it was probably still standing thanks to magic. She pulled open the front door, and stepped inside a dimly lit, dusty bar that was full of people Mia didn’t really think would be her type of company. She scanned the crowd and saw Remus slumped over a glass of scotch in the corner, an odd bubble of space around him as if everyone thought he had spattergroit and didn’t want to get too close. 

She made her way up to the bar, sliding onto the barstool next to him and waving the bartender over.

“I’d like to pay his tab, please” She said politely.

Remus turned to look at her, his eyes bloodshot and his face crestfallen.

“What are you doing here?”

“You didn’t come to bed—” she replied. “Tom told me I could probably find you here”

“You shouldn’t be out alone…” he growled, his words slurred together as he spoke.

She shrugged “Then you should’ve came to bed” 

The bartender handed her a slip for Remus’s tab- he drank 8 galleons and 5 sickles worth of scotch. Mia swore under her breath when she dropped a handful of gold coins on the bar counter and slid them to the bartender. Remus downed the last sip of scotch quickly, smacking his tongue as the liquid burned his throat.

“Let’s go home?” she asked.

He nodded, stumbling slightly as he got to his feet. She took his hand and led him to the front of the bar, their path suddenly blocked by a tall, greasy man.

“Look what the kneazle dragged in here, boys” he grumbled drunkenly to a group of men to her left “If you’re looking for a good time sweetheart, you don’t have to settle for a werewolf”

“He’s my boyfriend” She said pointedly, trying to step around the man.

“Really? A pretty thing like you, and _something_ like him?” the man sneered, getting a couple laughs out of his friends.

“Piss off” she growled at him. 

“Mia, don’t…” Remus slurred, putting a hand on her shoulder 

“Why don’t we show her what a real man is like? Maybe the poor thing doesn’t know any better…?” a man to the left interjected

The greasy one put a hand up to stroke her cheek “yeah, I’d love to make this one scream…”

“Don’t touch me!” she hissed, smacking his hand away from her. 

The man grabbed her shoulders; she threw her hands in front of her and pushed his chest hard, feeling the mysterious electric shock against her palms as she did so. Remus stepped in front of her and clocked the man square in the jaw— his buddies to the left scattering back, afraid to get too close.

“You half-breed piece of shit!” the greasy man shouted as he grabbed his jaw, spitting blood onto the floor in front of Remus’s feet.

He seized Mia around the waist and pulled her outside the bar, stumbling slightly as he walked. The chill in the air made her nipples harden, making her feel self-conscious again about forgoing her bra. Remus reeked of scotch, the smell wafting around her as he dragged her around the corner into the safety of Diagon Alley.

“You shouldn’t’ve come; the Screaming Chimaera is no place for you!” he said firmly, rubbing his face furiously.

“Obviously it’s no place for you either; those guys hate werewolves”

He blinked at her for a moment, his eyes bloodshot and glassy from his obvious intoxication. He plopped down on a bench in a huff, resting his elbow on the armrest and his forehead in his hand.

“Everyone hates werewolves” he grumbled

“I don’t…” she whispered

She reached out and stroked his cheek, his stubble scratching her smooth palm. He avoided her eyes but allowed her to touch him. She felt a little sorry for him in this moment, but wouldn’t dare ever tell him that.

“I’m sorry about this morning…”

He held his hand up to shush her. “You did nothing wrong” he whispered

They were silent for a moment, the lament and self-loathing visible in his expression. She thought back to the electricity she felt on her palms as she had pushed the tall greasy man— should she mention it now? Or mention it when he had sobered up? She chose the latter, for it was late and he needed to sleep off the copious amounts of scotch he’d consumed.

“Let’s go home” she said.

She took his hand and helped him stand, Remus stumbling as his foot hit a raised cobblestone. Mia helped him balance, wrapping her arms around his torso.

“Hold onto me” she said

He nodded as she embraced him tighter, smelling the strong scent of scotch more intensely as they shared their breathing room. She closed her eyes and feeling the uncomfortable tug behind her navel. They disappeared from the street with a soft pop, leaving behind only the sound of the breeze rustling the nearby foliage.


	45. chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get a little dark this chapter- just for a moment or two... sorry in advance

Over the month of June, Remus and Mia shared babysitting Reggie with Tonks’s parents. Mia enjoyed having her godson over and Remus was great with him, his face lit up every time he would pick up the baby. After the night Mia had to retrieve him from the Screaming Chimaera drunk off his arse, she was initially surprised he still wanted to watch Reggie as often as they did. He had woken up the next day seeming more normal, and Mia felt it unnecessary to drudge up that conversation right now. Sure, she thought she wanted kids of her own one day, but certainly for now, she was just fine with it being just the two of them. He had gotten so upset at just the mere joke of conception, she feared that another comment could send him head first into a vat of scotch that might be more difficult to pull him out of.

They had received an owl from Dumbledore on the last day in June, asking them, Tonks and Bill to guard the school while he was away, worried about a possible Death Eater attack. She was thrilled to be called for guard duty; it had been too long since she was needed, since she was a valuable member of the Order. She needed more excitement in her life than her mundane aide position at the Ministry.

Patrolling Hogwarts brought back many memories for Mia. Passing the Ravenclaw common room made her almost homesick for the castle. She had had many fantastic memories in the common room with Penelope, from studying together as 1st years to gossiping about boys as 4th years, to then sitting by the windows studying for NEWTs as 7th years – she had practically grown up inside those walls. To be walking by now at the age of 21, the memories of being a student at Hogwarts seemed like it happened a lifetime ago, but yesterday all in the same. Passing by the Defense against the Dark Arts classroom tempted her to go inside and see if the office looked different now that it wasn’t occupied by Remus. She longed to see the plush emerald couch that she had grown so fond of, or to sip tea by the window that overlooked the quidditch pitch. She didn’t dare enter, as it was now Professor Snape’s domain and she knew he wouldn’t appreciate an intruder.

“Feels like almost a lifetime ago, doesn’t it?” 

She turned around to see Remus standing a few paces behind her, his eyes a deep sapphire blue in the dim lighting of the corridor.

“I was just thinking that” she said, walking to him and kissing him. “It feels like yesterday at the same time, too.”

“I wonder what Severus has done with my office— I miss teaching here.”

Mia hugged him- she knew how much he missed teaching; he had loved it and been very good at it.

“We could pretend you do” she said with a sly grin “you could teach me a lesson— in your non-academic expertise, Professor Lupin…”

She bit her lip as she brushed the front of his trousers, feeling his bulge grow immediately from her touch.

“Hey hey hey—“

He grabbed her wrists and held her hands away from him, his face flushing as he quickly looked over his shoulder.

“As much as I would _love_ to do that—” he said, stifling a grin “Dumbledore gave us a job to do. We shouldn’t’ve stood here as long as we did”

She crossed her arms and stuck her bottom lip out, pretending to pout like small child.

“You’re no fun” she teased.

They walked together hand in hand until they came to a fork in the corridor and parted ways, but not before she planted a firm kiss on his lips, standing on the very tip of her toes to reach him. Mia walked a few more corridors on other floors reminiscing for another half an hour or so. She was beginning to get bored walking by herself, thinking Dumbledore was overreacting by having this many members of the Order patrolling the school when there were staff members that could’ve done the job. 

Another few minutes went by and she heard commotion. She stopped and listened— it didn’t seem like a few students sneaking out after hours. She ran around the corner to find a couple Death Eaters striding down the corridor, jeering and laughing about how easily they had gotten in. They began firing spells at Mia the moment they saw her, maniacal grins plastered on their faces. She deflected their hexes, worried she couldn’t fight two against one, she sprinted out of sight, making it around a few corners before she thought she lost them. She hustled a little farther, nearing the astronomy tower when a deep, raspy voice paralyzed her.

“Well, well, well— look who it is…”

Her breathing hitched; she turned her head slowly, fear coursing through her as she laid eyes upon Fenrir Greyback. His grin was sinister, his eyes cold and dark, flickering with savagery. She stared at him, frozen in fear, unable to run, unable to fight. _Hex him, stun him, something!_ She told herself, willing herself to raise her wand and fight, but was unable to make her arm move. Her heart pounded as he moved closer to her, his grin making her stomach lurch. 

“I wasn’t expecting to see you here, what a pleasant surprise”

“Stay away from me!” she squeaked fearfully

Fenrir laughed maniacally, his grin twisting even more. _Come on, Mia, do something!_ Her mind screamed at her, her heartbeat quickening. 

“And why would I do that? Especially when you smell so wonderful…”

Fenrir leaned in close, cupping her face with his filthy hand as he sniffed her, inhaling deeply. 

“How about you come with me when we’re finished here tonight— the full moon is in a couple weeks, you know”

She let out a whimper as he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, the back of his fingers brushing against her jaw. She closed her eyes and began to tremble, pushing her body against the stone wall of the corridor as if to put as much space between her and Fenrir as possible. 

“It’ll give me great pleasure, seeing the look on Remus’s face when he learns I marked and turned you—you’ll be my little werewolf bride”

She felt the knuckle of his index finger trail down her neck and chest, terror paralyzing her. She felt a whoosh of air over the top of her head, opening her eyes to see Fenrir looking to his left, stepping away from her. It was Bill, who just barely missed Fenrir with a stunning charm.

“Get away from her!” Bill hollered, sending another hex his way.

Fenrir bared his teeth, throwing up a shield charm. They began dueling, just as another Death Eater rounded the corner and send a jet of purple right at Mia. She found herself able to move again, deflecting the hex and fighting back. They sent hex after hex at each other, Mia eyeing the man furiously as she watched his spell pattern, looking for a window of opportunity. The world around her seemed to fade as all her focus was on the graying man before her. She wasn’t sure if it was just luck, or if the Death Eater slowed down, but she hit him square in the chest with a body bind curse, his arms and legs snapping together. He fell, face first on the stone floor, frozen. Mia turned back to see Fenrir on top of Bill, blood splattering everywhere as he slashed Bill’s face. 

“Bill!” Mia cried, pointing her wand at Fenrir.

Fenrir was quicker, sending her flying onto her back before she was able to stun him. Her wand went flying out of her hand, clattering on the stone floor a few feet away from her. She tried to stretch for it, but it was just out of her reach. She was just now aware of her bracelet vibrating, certain that Remus was most likely in a duel with another death eater not too far away. Fenrir stood up, walking to her as she was crawling for her wand. 

“Now… where were we?”

He grabbed her ankle and pulled her towards him, climbing on top of her. He was dripping with Bill’s blood, his eyes wild with excitement from the attack. He tore at her shirt as she writhed underneath him, trying to get free.

“Stay still, Princess” He ordered “I want to see those pretty scars I gave you…”

He gave her a carnivorous smirk as he forced her pants down. Bill’s blood transferred to her clothes, skin and hair; the metallic scent of the sanguine fluid mixed with dirt and sweat made her nauseas. _No, No, No_ She thought as she struggled _this isn’t happening_. Her mind was racing; she felt a surge of adrenaline run through as she wished with all her might for her to push him off. She didn’t even realize what happened at first when she felt him lift off of her, flying backwards and landing 100 feet away. He wasn’t moving; Mia wasn’t sure if he was dead, or if he was just stunned. 

She laid there for a moment, staring at her shaking hands. Jets of red light had come out of her palms right before Fenrir was launched into the air, leaving her confused on what exactly had just happened. Had she just cast a stunning charm, wandless? She turned to look at Bill, unconscious and bleeding profusely. _Get it together_ she told herself, shaking off her nerves. She pulled her jeans back up; thankful for whatever her hands just did for her. She sprung up and grabbing her wand, running to Bill’s side.

“Bill? Bill! Can you hear me?” She called, shaking him gently.

Bill gave no reply. Mia felt his neck, feeling a very faint pulse. She pointed her wand at one of the gashes, hoping she would be able heal them without silver and dittany.

“Episky!”

The wound did not heal. She tried a couple more times with no more luck than she had on the first try. She heard a cackle on her left, turning to see another Death Eater staring at them.

“Mosmordre!” the man called, his wand pointing through a nearby broken window.

The Dark Mark now illuminated the outside grounds, casting an ominous green glow. The Death Eater was then knocked over by a flash of purple that came from seemingly nowhere. Tonks came bustling around the corner, her face contorting at the sight of Bill and Mia. His face was severely slashed that had she not seen him be attacked, Mia wouldn’t’ve been able to tell it was him.

“Bloody hell” Tonks whispered, her face draining of color.

“It’s Bill” Mia squeaked “He was attacked by Greyback”

Tonks transfigured a stretcher from some of the broken window glass as Mia cast a levitating charm, lowering Bill gently onto the stretcher. They grabbed each side and began running towards the hospital wing. They ran into Ginny helping Neville to the hospital wing, limping along slowly. 

“Who is that?” Ginny called.

She looked horrified at the slashed up body on the stretcher as they ran by. Tonks and Mia shot each other nervous glances before turning back to Ginny.

“Bill” Tonks squeaked as they rounded around the corner. 

Mia heard Ginny scream “WHAT?” as they were running down the corridor, almost to the hospital wing. There wasn’t time to explain, they weren’t even sure if Bill was still alive at this point. They picked up the pace when the saw the door to the hospital wing, barging through the door and setting Bill down on the first bed in the ward.

“What on earth is that noise?!” Madam Pomfrey spat as she walked out of her office. “Oh my— merlin’s beard!” 

Her face whitened at the grotesque scene before her. 

“It’s Bill Weasley!” Mia cried. “He was attacked by Fenrir Greyback— please Madam Pomfrey, you have to help him!”

Madam Pomfrey jumped into action, Tonks assisting her by handing her jars and packs of bandages. Mia stepped back, slinking into a chair across from them, beginning to shake. She was covered in blood, her clothing half torn off, and her heart was still pounding from the adrenaline that was pumping through her. She felt around her pockets and in her bra— her calming draught was gone. She knew Madam Pomfrey had some here, but she was too busy trying to save Bill at the moment. She brought her knees to her chest, burying her head in her knees as she tried to calm herself with deep breaths.

 _Please_ she thought, praying to whoever or whatever might be listening to her. _If you’re up there listening, please, let Bill pull through._

* * *

The hospital wing was soon filled with people. Neville was situated upright in the bed next to Bill. Luna, Hermione and Tonks sat on the edge of his bed, while Remus and Ron sat on either side of Bill’s bed, waiting for the Weasley’s and Fleur to arrive. Ginny had gone back to find Harry after dropping Neville off, looking sick to know that her brother hung on the edge of life and death. Mia sat in a chair across the room, her hair stuck to Bill’s dried blood on her face. She wrapped herself in blanket to cover her torn clothing, mostly trying to hide her appearance so she wouldn’t have to talk about what she saw and experienced just yet. Harry and Ginny walked into the hospital wing right before Arthur, Molly and Fleur, the room growing noisy as Molly and Fleur began a heated discussion. 

“All zees scars show iz that my ‘usband iz brave!” Fleur hollered “Did you really think zat I would not marry ‘im still? Or were you ‘oping?"

Mia wasn’t paying much attention to the conversations happening before her, her mind was elsewhere, replaying the events with Fenrir and Bill’s attack over and over in her mind. However, when she heard Harry say “Dumbledore is dead”, her mind snapped back to reality. She saw Remus collapse into his chair, his face in his hands. Arthur’s face went pale, and Hermione’s hand clasped over her mouth. 

“Dumbledore is dead?” Mia asked

She realized she had been invisible to most of them until now, as many of them turned their heads and looked surprised to see her.

“Snape killed him” Harry said flatly, anger flashing in his eyes.

“Snape??” Hermione said incredulously. 

“No…” Mia whispered, mostly to herself. 

It didn’t make any sense to her that Snape killed Dumbledore. He was a double agent, but he was on _their_ side— or maybe so they thought. Mia lost herself in thought again, feeling extremely tired now that she was coming down off her rush of adrenaline. Her eyes felt heavy, it was a struggle to keep them open. She allowed them to close, telling herself she would only rest her eyes for a minute.

“Mia?”

Her eyes fluttered open to see Remus kneeling in front of her. His eyes looked bloodshot, his dark circles more pronounced as if it were close to a full moon. The clock on the wall told her she had been asleep for over an hour.

“Are you ready to go home? Bill is stable; he’s going to remain here for a bit.” Remus said gently.

Mia nodded, shifting to get up out of the chair. She pulled the blanket off of her to reveal her blood soaked, torn clothing. 

“Blimey, Mia, what happened to you?” Ron asked as his mouth dropped to the floor.

“Fenrir went after me after he attacked Bill.” 

Her voice much steadier than she thought it would’ve been. She caught Remus’s stare, his eyes wide with horror.

“What happened?” he asked quickly 

He looked her up and down, checking for new scratches or injuries. Mia tried to shake him off, stifling down a lump forming in her throat. She felt self-conscious by everyone’s intrusive stares, wishing she would’ve waited until everyone else left before she got up.

“I don’t want to talk here— can we go?”

“Sure” Remus said, swallowing hard. “Molly, Arthur, please owl if you need anything at all.”

Mia felt eyes on the back of her head as her and Remus exited the hospital wing. She felt immense relief that Bill was going to pull through, but the look that Remus now had on his face made her stomach do flip flops. His mouth was clasped into a tight line, and his eyes seemed to flicker with a bit of fury that wasn’t there a few minutes prior. They walked in silence out of the gates and towards Hogsmeade, the grounds still illuminated the eerie shade of green. Once they reached the edge of Hogsmeade, she took his hand, and with a pop, they were gone.

* * *

“Tell me what happened”

Immersed in warm bath water, Mia sat with her knees to her chest as Remus washed the dried blood and dirt off of her. He sat on the edge of the bathtub, gently massaging as he scrubbed her back with a washcloth. Mia closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn’t want to talk about what had happened, but she knew she was going to have to at least at some point. 

“It’s my fault— Bill’s injuries are my fault” 

Remus sat the wash cloth down and adjusted himself so he could look at her better.

“No it’s not— why are you blaming yourself?”

“Fenrir found me, and I froze when I saw him. I told myself to fight, to hex him, but I couldn’t move. I was terrified.” Mia began to pick at her fingernails anxiously. “Bill came ‘round the corner and saw him pushing me against the wall, and began to fight him. I got into a duel with another Death Eater, but when I looked back he was slashing Bill’s face.”

Her voice began to break as the scene flashed in her mind’s eye. She could see it just behind her closed eyes; Bill’s blood splattering everywhere as Fenrir sliced him with tremendous force.

“He grabbed me, and was on top of me, yanking my pants down” 

Remus inhaled sharply, his face contorting with rage and turning a deep shade of purple “I’ll rip his throat out, that fucking animal— I’ll kill him, I’ll fucking kill—”

“Remus! He didn’t— he didn’t get that far” Mia said quickly.

Her chin quivered as she brought her knees to her chest even tighter, the scene unwantedly replaying in her mind.

“Before he could— could do _anything_ … I—“

She stopped. She wasn’t sure what she did to blast Fenrir off of her, wasn’t sure how to explain what happened. She looked down at her palms, her hands shaking again. Remus stared at her inquisitively, wanting her to continue.

“You…?”

“I stunned him— I think” she said, still looking down at her palms.

“You think…?” he said, his posture relaxing as his expression puzzled. “What spell did you cast?”

“I didn’t. I didn’t have my wand.” She said softly, her brow furrowing. “It came from my hands”

“You cast a stunning charm, _wandless?_ ”

He sounded unconvinced. Mia shrugged, unsure of what to say. She grabbed a bottle of shampoo and squeezed a dollop into her hand. She lathered her hair, soap bubbles trickling gently down her back.

“That’s a whole different level of magic— beyond transfiguring your wand or lighting a candle”

“I’m really not sure what happened— He could be dead for all I know”

She actually hoped he was dead. If he was, she would never have to worry about him touching her again.

“He’s not, he must’ve been stunned. Harry said he was there when Snape killed Dumbledore.”

Her heartbeat quickened. If Fenrir Greyback was alive, open the possibility that she run into him again was there. He had taking a liking to her and after what almost happened today, the idea of him near her terrified and repulsed her. 

“I need you to mark me, Remus” she whispered

He froze for a moment, his breathing hitched. He then shook his head, muttering something inaudible under his breath. He reached for his wand off the bathroom counter and conjuring a goblet out of thin air. He pointed his wand at the cup, filling it with clean water to rinse her hair.

“We don’t have to do that— the flat is under a Fidelius charm, as long as you are inside these walls you will be safe” he said dismissively.

“I have a job, I have to support us— I can’t just hole up in here for the rest of my life”

“Not the rest of your life, just until this is all over”

“And who knows how long that will be!” She cried “I can’t become a prisoner in my own house”

Remus stopped rinsing her hair, sighing heavily. The tension in the room was thick as they stared at one another. Mia could see a spark of fear behind his eyes as he studied her intently— she was sure he was trying to come up with another excuse.

“I watched Sirius grow more depressed by the day while he was stuck inside headquarters— I don’t want to turn into that, especially when there is another option” she said calmly “an option that keeps Greyback at an arm’s distance and allows me to keep living my life”

He paused, his brows knitting together as his grip on his wand turned his knuckles white.

“I won’t do it— I can’t” he whispered, his voice firm.

“Why?” she asked “You always just say no, but you won’t explain _why_ ”

“It will seal you to me, forever.”

He resumed rinsing her hair, his jaw clenching and unclenching a few times.

“And what’s so wrong with that?” she chuckled

“It’s dangerous” he explained “Not only is it illegal to perform on a human, but I can’t take wolfsbane and it has to be done right before moonrise to ensure if takes properly— and if we’re not quick enough…”

“I’m an animagus, remember? I’ll just transform”

He waved his wand and the cup disappeared. He sighed and looked at her with a heavy expression.

“You don’t realize how much this will affect your body. You won’t be able to run, you won’t be able to transform. It will make you sick— very sick. I’ll end up tearing you to shreds, or turning you.” “We can have someone help us, someone else there to pull me out of the cellar before you turn.” 

She stood up and outstretched her hand for a bath towel. His eyes flickered to the scars that extended from her hips to just a few inches above her knees. They were large, raised slightly from the skin around them. His stomach churned at the thought of Fenrir climbing on top of her to do what he thankfully didn’t get to do. He averted his eyes; turning his attention to the bath towel hanging on the towel bar behind him, grabbing it hastily.

“You don’t understand what this will do…”

He cast a heating charm on the towel, handing it to her.

“And what don’t I understand?” 

She wrapped herself in the warm fluffy towel and stepped on the bathroom rug, turning back to Remus still seated on the edge of the tub.

“I would have to bite you, during intercourse, albeit still as a human— but it will leave you with a scar.” He said tensely “It not only will make it so no werewolves will touch you, but it will make it so you cannot mate with anyone besides me. Your lust will be for me and me alone.”

“Ok, I still don’t see the problem…”

“To condemn a young, unmarried woman to a magical curse such as this would be… _reprehensible_.” He said sighing, running a hand through his graying hair.

“So marry me.”

Mia sat down on the toilet seat, looking at him with a straight face.

“What?” he blinked at her vacantly.

“You heard me. Marry me.”

Remus just looked at her. She crossed her arms so matter of fact. He stared at her blankly, blinking at her a few times. 

“You want to marry a werewolf?” he asked slowly, his tone cynical.

“Shut up” she snorted, rolling her eyes

“Your position at the Ministry could be compromised, people like Dolores Umbridge will make it their mission to see to it you don’t work there because of your association with me.”

“I don’t care— I can have any job I want with my school marks, I don’t have to work for the Ministry.”

“People will hate you just because you are married to someone like me, they will say horrible things to you”

“Let them hate me then— I don’t care”

“You should” he replied quietly “You should care”

“Why? Because my value as a woman is based on what other people think of me? That’s bullshit” she spat, grabbing her hair brush from the counter and running through her damn hair roughly. “I know you’ve had issues with feeling like an outcast all your life, but my value comes from how I feel about myself, not what others think about me.”

Remus fidgeted with his wand, a slight, amused smirk creeping across his face.

“When did you get so wise?” he murmured.

“Helen is good at her job” Mia chuckled with a playful eye roll. “I told you the day Penelope and I came to your cottage, that I want this life because I want you. Let them call me a filthy half-breed fucker, I don’t care. They can call me whatever they like, as long as I have you— _you_ are the only life I need”

“You think your mother would be ok with you marrying a werewolf?” he asked, his brow raising.

“I think she honestly is more concerned that you were my teacher, which she got over, _mostly_ ” she chuckled. “Let me ask you something now; would you be hesitant to get married if you weren’t a werewolf?”

“No” He shook his head, the familiar expression of self-loathing visible.

“Then you shouldn’t feel any different about it, because your condition doesn’t affect your ability to marry. So, I say again; marry me.”

“Mia…”

“Do you love me?”

He let out a bark of laughter “Of course I do” he said frankly

“Then marry me, Remus.”

They were silent as they locked eyes, Mia wishing she was a legilimens in this moment, to be able to read his thoughts.

“Am I _really_ that bad that I have to beg you?” she asked softly

“No— _god no_ , you’re perfect” he whispered. He stared at her for a minute, and then let out a long sigh “I’d need to ask your mother’s permission…”

“No you don’t, that’s so archaic.” She snorted a small giggle.

“If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it right.” He said firmly. “I will get your mother’s blessing. We will ask our friends to witness. You’ll wear a white dress and carry roses down the aisle. We’ll say our vows at sunset and then dance with our friends until daybreak.”

Mia smiled a wide, toothy grin. “Someone has his wedding day all planned out” she teased, raising her brow.

Remus chuckled softly, fixing his attention on a seashell painting that hung on the bathroom wall next to the door. “I’d like a spring wedding, the weather is perfect at the end of April— and I will ask you properly, after I speak with your mother of course.” 

Mia winked at him as she stood up, walking back into her bedroom to put on her pajamas.

“Do I get a wedding ring?” she called back to him.

Remus stood in the doorway of the bathroom, leaning against the doorframe as he watched her slide her satin sleep shorts over her rump.

“If that’s what you would like, absolutely”

Mia smirked as she walked over to kiss him. “Now that we’ve agreed to get married, will you mark me?”

Remus’s smile faded and he tensed slightly. “Mia…”

“Please, Remus— he isn’t going to stop this.” she pleaded softly “The look on his face when he was about to—“ 

Remus held his hand up to silence her, shaking his head. She looked at him with large, glassy eyes, her expression pleading with him to agree. He let out a long sigh, envisioning Greyback in his mind’s eye crawling on top of her. He felt sick at the thought of the savage werewolf touching her, anger surging through him just at the mere idea of it. He nodded stiffly as he pulled her into a tight embrace.

“Alright, fine— I’ll do it.”


	46. chapter 46

Mia decided she hated funerals. They were terrible. They were intended so the living could mourn the dead and pour their feelings out about how much the deceased was loved. Sharing her feelings might be growing a little easier thanks to her visits with Helen, but she wasn’t jumping up and volunteering to speak in front of a hundred people gathered today around the white marble tomb. She felt many emotions as she stared at the body of Albus Dumbledore, fingers intertwined with Remus’s, hearing the heartfelt testimonies of how wonderful a man he was. She was sad; Dumbledore had been nothing but kind to her, and treated her well. She felt a certain brotherhood connection with him being in the Order of the Phoenix together. She also felt confused; confused that Severus Snape was indeed the one to have murdered him. Dumbledore trusted Snape, was Dumbledore not as cunning as she had thought? Lastly, she was angry, for all the reasons she was confused. She wanted to hex Snape into oblivion next time she saw him.

She looked around at the other members of the Order, studying them closely. Tonks held a sleeping Reggie tight in her arms as Kingsley sat next to her, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Susan and Molly held onto each other as they cried silently together, Arthur gently patting Molly’s back. Fleur sat by Olympe Maxime, her old Beauxbatons headmistress, looking out of place without Bill at her side. Moody sat in a corner by himself, his magical eye whirring about. Ron looked like he was going to vomit as Hermione cried into his shoulder, and Harry had an expression like stone, etched onto his face and unchanging. Even Professor McGonagall looked a twinge of green herself, staring at Dumbledore with watery eyes. Mia turned to look at Remus, wanting to seek comfort in his presence. His posture was rigid— his jaw was clenched together and gazed fixed ahead.

“You ok?” she whispered, so quietly she wasn’t certain if Remus would hear her.

“No” he whispered back “this is bad, Dumbledore dead is bad”

“I know”

“He was the only wizard Voldemort fears. Now, nothing is in his way”

“I know”

They listened to a few older witches speaking short eulogies as Mia continued to watch the expressions of the crowd around them. Remus remained still as a statue; doing everything he could to stay calm. Mia felt fear rise in her; now that Dumbledore was gone, what was going to happen? Could Voldemort truly rise to power? Take over the Ministry and begin a reign of terror? She shook off the thought— she never thought of the Order of the Phoenix being on the losing side of the war, and it made her sick to think about.

“Remus?” 

“hmm?”

“I’m scared”

Her voice shook slightly as she whispered. He squeezed her hand a little tighter and nodded, a vein in his forehead popping out from clenching his jaw too tight.

“Me too”

* * *

Remus rapped on the front door three times, his palms sweating profusely. He wiped his hands on the back of his trousers and jammed them into his pockets, rolling his shoulders and giving himself a mental pep-talk. _She told you she thought you were the best thing for her; there is no need to be nervous. Just relax; she can smell fear a mile away._ He rocked on his heels, feeling self-conscious that maybe he should’ve owled first— he hadn’t thought of common courtesy until this very moment, standing on the porch like an idiot.

As Susan opened her front door, Remus realized this was the least put together he had ever seen her. She was dressed in raggedy old clothes, her hair pulled up messily, and her face lacking any makeup— she obviously had not been expecting a visitor to drop by at this time of the morning.

“Remus, I wasn’t expecting company; I apologize, I’m doing some late spring cleaning— is Mia with you?”

She craned her neck to look behind him.

“No, she’s working at the Clearwater’s shop—“

Susan drew her wand, pointing it at his throat and cutting off his sentence.

“Mia learned magic from Sirius Black that upset me when I found out— what was it?”

“He taught her the Animagus transfiguration” Remus replied without falter.

She lowered her wand, nodding and smiling slightly. “Come in.”

“I’m so sorry, I should’ve sent an owl…” he said awkwardly

“No, no it’s alright, come in—“

Remus stepped inside, following her down the entrance hall to the living room. He shoved his hands back into his pockets awkwardly, chewing on his tongue inside his mouth.

“Sorry I drew my wand on you— for all I know Dolohov tortured my address out of you and killed you”

“Nothing of it— we can’t be too careful”

She motioned for him to sit down. “Pardon the mess,”

Remus wanted to laugh— Susan’s house was pristine; so clean you could eat off the floor without worry. He settled himself awkwardly on the living room couch as Susan retreated into the kitchen. He sunk a couple inches into the cushions, taking note on just how comfortable the furniture was as he heard the sound of clanking dishes in the next room.

“Milk and sugar in your tea?” she called to him.

“No, plain is fine— thank you” 

The sweat returned to him palms as his stomach flip flopped. He wiped his hands roughly on his trousers, _Relax, Remus Relax._ He took the time to observe Susan’s living room, not a single item out of place, everything sparkling clean. _Pardon the mess_ he shook his head _this woman is mental._

Her home was older, and had a very stately feel about it. The living room had built in bookshelves that displayed literature from floor to ceiling, framing a handsome brick fireplace. A small pot of floo powder was attached to one side of the fireplace. The mantle was decorated with photos of Mia, from images of her as a small child to more current. He was surprised to see one of the photos was of himself with her, in front of their Christmas tree this past holiday. He smiled, remembering the moment the photo was taken.

_“Alright you two, let’s take one in front of the tree now!”_

_“Mum, please— enough with the photos”_

_“We need to cherish the small moments in life, Amelia, because one day they are all we have left— for merlin’s sake Remus, put your arm around her, she doesn’t have Dragon Pox!”_

Mia had rolled her eyes over and over at Susan that day before diving into the mountain of paperwork she insisted needed done that day. He felt a twinge of desire as he remembered their night _after_ the witch had departed, but forced himself to shake off the thought. Getting a woody in the middle of Susan Roswell’s living room was the last thing he needed today.

Susan had a large abstract painting on one of the far walls, for which everything in the room look more expensive in its vicinity. Nestled below the painting was a hutch containing old records, a vintage turntable on display on top of the oak cabinet. He made his way over to the hutch, observing the collection of music. He was surprised to see amongst a collection of Duke Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald and Count Basie was a vast array of The Beatles, The Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin. He wondered if these records had once belonged to John, remembering him and Mia discussing their mutual love of rock ‘n’ roll. 

_“She certainly is a Roswell, Loves all the classics— I trained her well”_ John had told him, yelling over the stereo blasting Satisfaction as Mia danced around and sang loudly— and off key.

Remus also discovered a few of Celestina Warbeck’s records, stifling down laughter that Susan would listen to that witch’s garbage. The year they had spent Christmas at 12 Grimmauld place, Molly had Celestina’s Christmas album on repeat (the jazz-pop fluff driving all of them slowly insane) until Sirius confunded the record player, saving them all.

 _“Why isn’t this stupid thing working?”_ Molly had grumbled, banging the record player a few times.

 _“Oh, that thing is so old, Molly— it was my mother’s. Looks like we’ll just have to play music on the wireless”_ Sirius had shrugged to her, sneaking a wink and a mischievous grin at Remus and Mia.

The style and cleanliness of the house gave the impression Susan appreciated the finer things in life. Mia had grown up living in this home; with its elegant wainscoting and immaculate hardwood floors, he wondered how she could love his little tumble-down cottage so much when this was how she lived. Susan came clanking in to the living room with a tray of a tea pot and two mugs.

“I see you’ve found my record collection” she smirked.

“Oh, yes— I was looking at the amount of rock ‘n’ roll you have, these are all Mia’s favorites”

“Yes, we trained her well” Susan smiled “John took me to a Pink Floyd concert for our third date, we both proceeded to polish off a whole bottle of whisky and a few packs of cigarettes, and passed out in the back of his station wagon after the concert. Woke up at five in the morning to a police officer banging on the window and telling us to go home”

Susan and Remus both chuckled— Susan at the memory and Remus at imaging a young Susan at a rock concert. He couldn’t see it— she was always so uptight, so put together, but maybe he didn’t know her as well as he thought. Maybe the events of her life had turned her that way, maybe the young early 20’s Susan _would’ve_ been the kind of woman to get drunk at a rock concert and pass out in the back of an automobile with a gentleman she was just barely seeing.

“Now—“she said as she settled herself in a chair across from the couch “What is it that I can do for you on this lovely Saturday morning?”

“uhm— How are you doing about Albus?” he said awkwardly, sinking back into the couch cushions.

 _Dumbledore, really??_ It just came out, his subconscious delaying the nerve-wracking conversation.

“I’m worried if I’m to be honest” she said heavily “Albus dead is bad— there’s no telling what will happen from here”

Remus nodded, reaching for his piping cup of tea and sipping gingerly. They paused as Susan eyed him curiously. She leaned back in her chair, giving him a small smirk.

“Something tells me you’re not here to talk about Albus, though…”

“No” he said softly, shaking his head “I came to ask you something else.”

Susan raised her brow, looking at him intently “Go on…”

He felt uncomfortable under her gaze, her emerald eyes seemed to pierce into his soul as she smirked at him. Did she know what he was here to ask? 

“I came by, to ask you—erm…“

He froze, why was he so nervous? He coughed awkwardly, fidgeting with his hands as his mind screamed at him to spit it out. He’d be lying if he said Susan didn’t make him anxious.

“Remus, don’t squirm— I enjoy it far too much” Susan snickered “now spit it out”

He took a quick breath, speaking quickly as if it were easier to say the words if they came out fast. “I came by to ask you for Mia’s hand— for your blessing”

Susan smiled a little more, taking a sip of her tea. “Let me ask you something first— why do you want to marry my daughter?”

“Why?” He asked incredulously.

He hadn’t been anticipating this question, he assumed she would either say yes and throw her arms around him, or say no and start firing hexes at him. But to ask him _why_ he wanted to marry Mia? Why wouldn’t he want to marry her?

“Yes, why do you want to marry her?”

“Because I love her.” he said simply “and she loves me, _god only knows why…_ ” he added under his breath with a cynical shrug.

Susan raised a brow at him, seemingly unsatisfied by the simplicity of his answer.

“Here’s the truth, Susan” He sighed heavily “I can’t give Mia any promises of a great life. I can’t hold a job, I’m broke and I am an outcast. She will be looked down upon if she marries me, more than she is now when people have learned she is involved with someone like me”

He set his tea down, looking Susan straight in the eye.

“But I can love her. I can give her the emotional support she needs, be her sidekick— her cheerleader. I can support her dreams, hopes and aspirations even if I cannot chase my own. I can rub her feet at the end of a long day, I can be the shoulder to cry on who always has a piece of cheesecake and a heated blanket ready for her.”

Susan’s smile returned, creeping across her face slowly.

“I will treat her well; I will be her partner that she can turn to for anything. I will care for her like she deserves, because I love her so, _so_ much”

Susan nodded her smile turning to a smug smirk. Remus once again began to fidget, his ears growing hot. Was she about to laugh in his face and tell him to get out? He felt like an idiot— maybe he shouldn’t’ve came here today.

“Well it’s about damn time, don’t you think?” she said “Mia doesn’t need you to shower her with money or take her out for expensive dinners— she’s never been stuffy. She needs someone to love and cherish her— that, I know you will do”

Remus breathed a sigh of relief, smiling thickly at her.

“If anyone had told me that my daughter’s Defense against the Dark Arts professor would be asking me to marry her, I would’ve told them they were mad.”

They both laughed, albeit Remus more awkwardly than her. They were silent for a moment once their laughter died; Remus felt the overwhelming urge to speak again, unsure of why he would bring this up to Susan in the first place.

“She wants me to mark her.” he said quietly.

Susan nodded slowly, “she told me.”

“I don’t want to” he said “I don’t want to do that to her.”

“Greyback has threatened to mark and turn her himself, hasn’t he?”

“Yes, he wants to use her to mess with me” He said “I wanted her to quit working, stay in the flat where the Fidelius charm will protect her”

“You and I both know you can’t keep her cooped up in that flat forever” Susan said frankly “she’d go mad”

“Its dark magic” he said “I swore I’d never leave a mark on her. I swore I’d never plague her with something so— so _barbaric._ ”

“Let me ask you— what exactly would it do for her? Why would it keep Greyback away?”

“The curse only allows the marked to mate with the werewolf that marked them.” Remus explained “They also cannot be pursued by any other werewolf other than the one that marks them. There were two women that were marked while I was underground in Bath. I could talk to them, be a normal standing distance, but I couldn’t touch them. I couldn’t even shake their hand— I just physically couldn’t do it”

“So Greyback couldn’t touch her if you marked her” Susan said, a statement not a question.

“He couldn’t get more than an arm’s length from her” 

Susan studied him intently, thinking hard. Remus could almost hear gears turning in her head as she went through a few facial expressions.

“You need to do it.”

“What?” he blinked at her vacantly

“She told me about what happened with him at Hogwarts the other day— Remus, you need to do it”

“You want me to curse your daughter with dark magic?” he asked flatly

“Yes, I want you, Remus Lupin, the one whom she loves, to curse her with dark magic” Susan said simply “Because I’ll be damned if someone else does it instead.”

* * *

The Order had abandoned 12 Grimmauld place as their headquarters, fearing its safety was compromised now that Dumbledore was dead. With the Fidelius charm broken after his death, all members of the Order became secret keepers for the location of headquarters, Snape included. The Weasley’s graciously offered the Burrow again as the new headquarters, the wards around it keeping anyone uninvited out of the house’s grounds.

The clock was ticking on Harry’s 17th birthday. Dumbledore left Moody in charge of the Order of the Phoenix, and had left detailed notes about the protection charm that was on Harry and the Dursley’s home, which would expire on his birthday. The spell Dumbledore cast those many moons ago allowed Harry to live with his aunt and uncle safely, providing he still called 4 Privet Drive home, would no longer be in effect after July 31st.

“Moving Potter is going to be a challenge; we need a firm plan” Moody growled, pacing in front of the table at the Burrow. “If we plan on moving him with getting any of us killed, we need to prepared all well versed”

“How do you think we should precede, Mad- Eye?” Susan asked “He will still have the trace on him until his birthday”

“We’ll need to use a non-traceable form of travel; broom, thestral, things of that sort” 

Moody’s magical eye whirred around as he paced, his prosthetic leg thumping heavily.

“What if we had more than one Potter?” a voice grumbled from the corner of the table.

It was Mundungus Fletcher, not a common person to speak up or offer suggestions in Order meetings. Everyone’s eyes fell on the short ginger-haired man, curious as to what he meant by this statement.

“More than one?” Remus asked, “you mean to use polyjuice?”

“Yeah, we could have like, 7 fakes of him. If we’re ambushed, they wouldn’t know who is real and who isn’t” Mundungus shrugged.

“That’s brilliant…”

Everyone turned to the kitchen doorway to see Ron, Hermione and Ginny huddled together, eavesdropping on the meeting. Hermione had accidently thought out loud, revealing the trio.

“You three should be upstairs!” Molly barked

“We want to help!” Ginny cried “Fred and George are in the Order now!”/p>

“Fred and George are of age” Molly said flatly.

“So are Hermione and I” Ron said “Mum, we’re joining— if you’ll have us, Mad-Eye”

“Alastor, you certainly won’t…” Molly sputtered.

“They are of age, Molly, I won’t stop them if they want to join.” He said, his voice low and gravelly as his magical eye inspected Ron and Hermione.

“What about me??” Ginny barked

“You are not old enough, now back upstairs!”

“But Mum!”

“ _Ginevra_ — listen to your mother and go upstairs.” Arthur said sternly.

Ginny stomped her feet all the way up the stairs, her footsteps getting quieter the father she was from the kitchen. Hermione and Ron pulled up a few extra chairs and scooted into the table next to Fred and George.

“Alright, let’s get back to business…” Moody continued.

After another hour of brainstorming, their plan was set. More than one Harry Potter would leave 4 Privet Drive and travel to a secure location, then portkey to the Burrow. They had split into pairs; Hermione with Kingsley, Fleur with Bill, Mundungus with Moody, Ron with Tonks, George with Remus, Fred with Arthur, Mia with Susan, and Harry with Hagrid. Molly would be waiting at the Burrow for everyone to arrive; the portkeys timed a few minutes apart to arrive in sequence. 

“Harry isn’t going to like this plan…” Hermione said

“He doesn’t have to like it!” Moody grumbled “we’ll have another meeting two days before we move him. See you all then.”

The meeting began to disband, everyone either getting up to leave, or turning to one another and engaging in conversations. Remus slipped away as Mia was distracted by Fred and George asking her to look at a couple new joke products they had debuting in a few weeks at their shop. He slipped into the kitchen, whispering in Molly’s ear.

“Molly, could I ask for your help with something?”

“Absolutely, Remus, anything” she said, giving him a friendly smile.

“I want to ask for Mia’s hand— I know what I’d like to say, but I need some help getting it all together”

“Oh Remus, how wonderful!” she cried, throwing her arms around him “I know just what we can do— _Alastor!_ ” 

Moody came thunking into the room loudly, his magical eye was doing somersaults as he inspected Molly and Remus. “Yes?”

“Alrighty, so before the next meeting…”

* * *

Remus sat at the breakfast table feeling sick; he had no idea how he was going to afford to pay for Mia’s wedding ring. Yes, he did have the money for it in his Gringotts vault, but it would throw off his budget that he calculated to make what little money he had last. He was frustrated with himself, unable to find steady work to pay for something like this made him feel loathsome and insecure. _You can barely afford to buy her a ring- what the hell does she even see in you?_ He tried to push these thoughts out of his mind, reminding himself on how adamant she had been that she didn’t care that she would support the both of them. She might not care, but he did.

“What’s wrong?”

“Huh?” Remus asked, his mind snapping back to reality.

She was sitting across the table with a small pile of muggle mail in front of her, starting at him with narrowed eyes

“You look like your about to hurl”

“Oh, no I’m fine— coffee just hasn’t kicked in yet” he said, shaking his head.

"Ok…” she said slowly, taking a breath before speaking again. “So, we need to talk about the full moon next week.”

“What of it?” he said, attempting to sound casual but failing miserably.

“You know what.”

He sighed heavily, rubbing his face vigorously in frustration. “I really _really_ do not want to do this”

“I need you to. I’ve talked with Arthur and Kingsley; we have a plan in place.”

“You talked— _fuck_ — what is this plan of yours, then?” he growled in frustration.

“We use the Weasley’s cellar, right before moonrise. Arthur and Kingsley will come down with us, and they can pull me out before you transform”

“They will have to watch us have sex” he said flatly “you really want that?”

“They can turn around” she shrugged “if you say I won’t be able to walk or transform, I need them there to pull me out”

Remus threw his face into his hands and let out a frustrated grunt. “No, no I won’t do it” he said through a constricted voice “I can’t”

“You agreed to it— please, I need this from you” she pleaded “The full moon is on a Friday this month, its perfect— I can recover Saturday and Sunday, go to work on Monday and then be able to move Harry that following weekend.”

He let out a frustrated exhale. “I— I need a shower” he grumbled, standing and making his way into the bedroom.

Mia shook her head irritably as she turned her attention to the stack of mail in front of her. She combed through the stack, finding a letter addressed to her that she didn’t recognize the return address. Opening the letter, she had to reread it a couple times before she understood what it was saying. When her brain finally made the connection, her mouth dropped open.

“Bloody hell” she whispered, her eyes bugging at the paper. “REMUS!” she called to him.

“What?!”

He poked his head through the doorway of the bedroom, looking exasperated.

“This letter— it’s from my Dad’s estate” she said, her brows raised so high they were nearly in her hairline “it’s about time, I signed this shit 6 months ago”

“That’s it?? _Jesus,_ Mia— you scared me” he breathed, shaking his head and walking back to the table. “What does it say?”

“Well, not only did Dad have a good amount of money tucked away, he also carried a substantial amount of life insurance. Since he and mum were divorced and Miranda was already gone, I am the sole benefactor” she said, handing Remus the letter.

“Bloody hell!” Remus choked; his eyes bugging at the check attached to the bottom of the letter. “How many zeros is that?”

“Looks like you not working will never be an issue”

She took the letter back to reread it, Remus watching her eyes move across the paper as she double and triple read the text. He ran a hand through his hair, realizing that with this amount of money coming to her, she didn’t need to work. He had found his scapegoat he’d been praying for.

“This is excellent—I don’t have to mark you! You have enough money to quit working”

She let out a frustrated sigh “Remus, it’s not about the money. I don’t want to become a prisoner here…”

His posture stooped as he studied her. His heart sank; his scapegoat failed him. He reached forward and twirled a strand of her black hair around his index finger “I just swore I’d never leave as much as a scratch on you, and to do _this_ …”

“You’re doing this because you love me” she whispered “you’re doing this to protect me.”

He kissed her forehead, pulling her into a tight embrace. When he pulled away, he glanced back down at the letter in her hands.

“So you had no idea this much money was coming?” he asked, studying the large figure at the bottom of the page.

“No idea” she said “I’m going to call Mum, I’m not even sure what to do with this from here”

Remus kissed her forehead again then made his way back to the bathroom, thinking he could probably afford her engagement ring now.

* * *

“What are you wearing to Bill and Fleur’s wedding?” Mia asked Penelope as she unpacked the piles of shopping bags she had brought home.

“I don’t know yet, I haven’t decided on dress robes or an actual dress” Penelope shrugged, eyeing Mia’s shopping spree “what is all that, anyway?”

“Oh, just some clothes. I also got Remus and Eric some dress robes for the wedding; Arthur thought it best if Eric blended in with the crowd.” Mia said as she picked up a dark purple set of dress robes out of one of the bags. “I hope he likes purple”

“He’s so nervous to attend a wizard wedding” Penelope giggled “I know Remus isn’t thrilled that he is coming with us, but I am really excited to have him there”

“Yeah, he has made it clear to me that he is still not a fan of him” Mia laughed “How serious are you two anyway?” she added slyly

“I don’t know…” Penelope shrugged and blushed, trying to sound casual.

Mia grinned and raised an eyebrow at her. Penelope threw one of the empty shopping bags at her

“Don’t look at me like that!” she laughed “I don’t know. We haven’t had any talks like that yet”

“mhmm” Mia hummed, chuckling and shaking her head.

“Are you nervous for tomorrow? To be, marked or whatever?” Penelope asked

“A little, but I can’t think of any other way to keep Greyback away, that doesn’t involve killing him. I think we should kill him, but apparently ‘our side doesn’t kill unless absolutely necessary’, as my mum and Remus have both said.” Mia said with an eye roll 

"It sounds like it’s necessary to me” Penelope shrugged.

“Yeah, no kidding— Remus is having a hard time with it, he has been avoiding me for a couple days. He has always said he never wanted to be one to leave a scar on me”

“Walk me though it?” Penelope asked “He wouldn’t tell me when I asked him”

“Basically he has to bite me while we shag, as close to moonrise as possible while he is still human. It’ll infect me slightly— change my pheromones so other werewolves cannot pursue me”

“It won’t turn you?” 

“If it’s done right, I shouldn’t turn.” Mia said “but I will probably take on symptoms— grumpiness around the full moon, etc.”

“So you’ll be taking your steaks rare from now on?”

“Absolutely not, no way” Mia cringed “I will _never_ eat my steaks rare”

They both laughed as Mia made a few gagging mimes. 

“And this is illegal?” Penelope continued.

“Only because I am human— if I were a werewolf too, it wouldn’t be”

“Sounds… gruesome”

“I’d rather be bit by Remus than Fenrir.” Mia said darkly.

“Fair enough”

There was a pause between them as Penelope rose and made her way to the kitchen for a drink. Mia continued to unpack her shopping bags, laying the items out in piles as to who they were for.

“By the way, I need you to close the shop next week— Thursday night” Penelope called back to her over the clanking of glasses.

“I can’t, I have an Order meeting that night and I work at the Ministry ‘til 4”

“You’ll have to be late for the meeting” Penelope shrugged.

“Penny, I can’t be late— this meeting is important”

“I don’t have anyone to close for me, I already told Remus and he said he’d take care of you being late” Penelope lied.

She tried desperately to keep a straight face as she made her way back into the living room with her water glass in tow. Remus asked Penelope to distract Mia for the evening to make her late to the meeting, a key point in his proposal plan.

“Mad- Eye is going to kill me, you know that?” Mia grumbled, picking out a copper dress from one of the shopping bags and throwing it to Penelope “try this on— if you like it you can wear it to the wedding”

* * *

Friday rolled around and Mia watched as Remus stared at his dinner plate, stress and anxiety plauging his expression. He looked ill, effects of the looming moon visible in his appearance. He had been considerably short with Mia since the morning, for which partially she chalked up to the cycle, but she also knew he was unhappy with her insistence for him to mark her. He had been drinking a considerable amount of scotch over the last few days, and today was no different. He had already dipped into a bottle by the time Mia had gotten home from work.

“Remus, more lasagna?” Molly asked, holding out a piece on a spatula across the table.

“No” he grumbled, waving her away.

“You don’t have to be snippy” Mia muttered to him softly.

The Weasley’s were gracious enough to have them for dinner beforehand, along with Susan, Tonks and Kingsley. They all piled around the table, crammed in like sardines, enjoying Molly’s homemade lasagna.

“So Remus, Kingsley and I have the cellar all ready to go—“ Arthur began.

“Are we _really_ doing this?” Remus snapped, ignoring Arthur and turning to Mia.

She froze as she was in mid-bite, chewing slowly as they locked eyes.

“Yes…we’ve talked about it—” she said slowly

“More like you’ve asked, and when I’ve said no, you decided we were doing it anyway!”

“ _Excuse me,_ but I seem to recall you agreeing to this after Greyback nearly had his way with me!” she hissed “This is the only way he will stop!”

“You’ve barely even considered the consequences…” he said angrily, his face turning red.

“I have too— I know what I am getting into!”

“You don’t—you are too impulsive and—”

“Remus Lupin!” Susan barked. 

She stood up and placed her palms on the table, leaning forward towards him. “You will quit. your. whining. You will do this for her— you will mark her tonight.”

Remus stared at Susan heatedly “I can’t believe you are alright with this.” he grumbled quietly, eyeing her up and down,

“Yes” Susan said simply. “Because I will say again what I said a few weeks ago— I will be damned if someone other than you sinks their teeth into her.”

“But—“

“This is happening! Tonight!” Susan said, throwing her hands in the air “Because if you don’t bite her _this cycle,_ you might not get another chance to. I know what it will do to both of you if Greyback gets the chance to do it instead.”

Remus gritted his teeth, glaring at the plate in front of him as his face remained beet red in frustration. Everyone else at the table was quiet as a mouse, afraid to look in his direction. Mia gripped her silverware tightly to keep her hands from shaking.

“If something were to happen to me…” he said quietly, still looking at his plate but addressing Mia “you wouldn’t be able to be with anyone else for the rest of your life. I wouldn’t want that for you”

“Then we will make sure nothing happens to you” she said calmly “But I would rather spend the rest of my life alone, then be forced to spend it with Greyback” 

The silence was deafening, as it took Remus nearly a minute to say anything. The room was so quiet they could hear the ghoul in the attic thunking around 6 stories up.

“So the cellar is ready to go, Arthur?” he said heavily.

“All set— we’ll get you squared away, and then bring Mia to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tee-hee, cliff hanger.
> 
> If ya'll love Sirius Black as much as you love Remus Lupin, I would love for you all to read my other fic, To Catch a Rat. It is a much _much_ shorter work than this one, under 10,000 words, and is now complete. It is a Sirius Black x OFC tale during his incarceration in Azkaban.
> 
> Thanks for taking the time to leave me kudos and comments, it is much appreciated! I update chapters about twice a week, so stay tuned for more<3


	47. chapter 47

The grass crunched softly beneath her bare feet as Mia stepped across the lawn. The sun was setting; soon a bright full moon would be luminous over the grounds of the Burrow. Mia would be lying if she said she wasn’t nervous; she had begun to feel jittery and anxious when Kingsley and Arthur took Remus into the cellar about a half hour ago. She shoved her hands into her robe pockets and attempted to shake off the feeling of her stomach in her throat.

She followed behind the men just a couple paces slower, going over what she was expecting from this evening. Remus had explained he had to bite her in his human form during intercourse, and that she would feel sick from it afterwards. They had planned to do this just before the moon rose to ensure the curse took properly— if they did it too early, they would risk the curse not taking, leaving her with a bite scar for nothing. The nerve-wracking part in doing this so close to moonrise was if they were not quick enough, Remus would transform and maul her to death— or worse, bite her in wolf form and turn her into a full-fledged werewolf.

Kingsley and Arthur stopped at the cellar door, turning back to her first before entering.

“You alright? Still want to do this?” Arthur asked her gently.

“Yeah, I’m good” Mia said, nodding to the men with a slight smile.

Stepping down the cellar stairs, her stomach flip flopped. The feeling of the cold cement on the bottom of her bare feet was less comforting than the soft grass she had just traveled over. The cellar had a slight musty smell about it, and was dimly lit with a few oil lamps. Canned goods were stacked on one side of the cellar whilst Remus stood in a shadowed corner on the other side of the underground room— shackled in a set of chains that connected to the wall, only allowing him a small circumference of area he could move within the underground room. Anger flooded through her; how dare they shackle him— shackle him like some kind of monster. If she had her wand, she probably would’ve sent a slug-vomiting hex at both of them for this. She turned to Kingsley, her eyes shooting daggers. 

“Why is he shackled?!” she hissed angrily. 

“It was his idea— It buys us an extra few seconds if he starts to turn” Kingsley said, his low voice calm and collected. “We don’t stand a chance against a full-fledged werewolf if you two aren’t quick enough”

She felt her heart flutter; what they were doing was extremely dangerous this close to moonrise, and she was wasting time by being angry at the arrangements made. She nodded stiffly then turned her head back to Remus, who was eyeing her up and down with a peculiar expression. 

“You’re afraid— I can smell it” he said quietly “you’re afraid of _me_ ”

“No, I’m not afraid of you,” she said, her voice wavering. “I asked for this— I’m just afraid it will hurt”. 

Arthur and Kingsley stepped behind her and drew their wands. 

“It will hurt. A lot.” Remus said cooly “You can still turn around and go— you know I don’t want to do this.” 

His eyes flickered at her; his odd expression gave Mia a flood of both anxiety and excitement. She could turn back, but this was the only sure thing to keep Fenrir Greyback away from her. She sighed heavily as she looked into his eyes; she loved this man, she trusted this man— with her life. She could do this; she needed him to do this. She untied her robe and slipped it off slowly, handing it to Kingsley. Remus looked her naked body up and down; gritting is teeth as his eyes devoured the sight before him.

“Um, can you guys turn around?” she asked Kingsley and Arthur awkwardly.

The men nodded, looking uncomfortable, and turned around. Their wands were still drawn and ready to use at a moment’s notice. Mia took a deep breath as she walked over to him and put her hands on his chest, trying to keep them from shaking. They locked eyes as she ran her hands along the giant slashes on his chest to the bite scar on his shoulder.

“If I do this, you will be mine— and _only_ mine” he breathed heavily as he looked at her, like a salivating dog waiting for a steak “forever.”

“I already am” she whispered “I’m yours— forever and always” 

He grabbed her and pinned her against the wall, his lips crashing against hers with near bruising force. Arousal and excitement flushed through her as his hands roamed her body, moaning softly against his lips as his hands kneaded her breasts. She closed her eyes to block out Arthur and Kingsley just a few paces away, letting herself get lost in the moment. This was between her and Remus, an intimate moment that she wanted to enjoy as long as she could. He picked her up, her legs wrapping around him as he laid her on her on the cool, dusty floor. This close to moonrise and with no wolfsbane in his system, he handled her rougher than he ever had before. She gasped as he pushed in firmly, gripping his shoulder blades tightly as he built up speed, taking her harder and harder with every stroke. She relished in pleasure; she always liked it when he was rough with her, and today was no exception. She was so aroused by his primal instincts and lack of restraint that she begged him for more and more, forgetting they were not alone in the cellar.

She was burning so intensely with the need for release that when it finally came, she cried out loudly as she dug her fingernails into his back. Her whole body shuddered in pleasure as she shattered into a million pieces, a feeling of complete and utter bliss. She barely got to take a breath before he grabbed her hair, turning her neck and sinking his teeth in right into the crook. She screamed; the sensation of fire searing from every tooth mark. 

“Back away from her, Remus!”

Arthur’s voice sounded like he was farther away than he was, her hearing muffled by her own heartbeat. She felt dizzy, she couldn’t stand, the whole world was around her was spinning. Her body felt weak and limp, an uncomfortable heat flooded through her from the bite. She felt her robe be thrown over her, and strong arms lift her off the cool floor. Through the muffled sounds, she could make out a horrible snarling and cracking noise as Kingsley was dashing away with her in his arms. She could barely see anything; it was all flashes of color and blobs around her.

“Arthur, seal the door!” 

Her vision swirled and blurred around her as they ran across the lawn and back into the house. “Get the powder!” she heard another voice shout as she felt Kingsley set her down on the living room couch. She felt the need to vomit, her heart was pounding and the wound seared with indescribable pain. She closed her eyes to try to help with the dizziness, but it just made it worse. Mia hissed in pain as she felt powder sizzle against the wound, sealing it closed. After a moment she felt relief— the wound no longer throbbing in time with her heartbeat. 

“Mia, honey, drink this” said Susan’s voice as she felt the rim of a potion vial touch her lips. She didn’t argue and downed the vial, closing her eyes and falling asleep.

* * *

The sight of Gryffindor Quidditch banners and posters of dragons came into focus as Mia opened her eyes the next morning. She looked around, realizing she was in Charlie’s bedroom. Tonks was asleep in the armchair in the corner, curled up comfortably and snoring softly. Mia felt nauseas, feverish, and confused as to who dressed her into the pajamas she was wearing. Her skin was clammy and damp; her hair was falling out of its ponytail and sticking to her shoulders, neck and back. She was incredibly thirsty, her mouth dry as if she had swished with acetone. She put her feet on the floor and went to stand up, but collapsed under her weight, waking Tonks. 

“What the— _shit_ Mia, you ok?” 

“Yeah” Mia groaned

She struggled to stand, needing Tonks to help pull her up and get her back in bed. She felt light-headed as she lay back down, painfully aware of her pounding headache.

“You need to rest, you went through a lot last night” Tonks said “let me grab you some breakfast.” 

“Where’s Remus?”

“He’s in the cellar.” Tonks replied “now lay back, I’ll get you some food” 

“I need to see him” she said, moving to stand again.

“No no no, _stay_ ” Tonks said forcefully, holding her hand up as if to scold a dog “you aren’t strong enough to stand yet”

“Tonks, I need to see him”

Tonks sighed heavily “stay here, let me bring you some food, and I’ll see about getting you to him?”

Mia rolled her eyes and nodded, sitting back in a huff. Tonks hustled off quickly, Mia listening to her footsteps as she retreated down the hall. She looked at herself in the mirror that sat on top of the dresser in front of her. She looked like hell; her skin was paler than normal with a twinge of sickly green and pronounced dark shadows encircled her glassy, bloodshot eyes. The bite mark was larger than she expected, and had scabbed over, the scabs the color of ash from the powder applied last night. She smiled slightly, feeling a surge of affection for Remus. She was so happy he had agreed to do this, it made her feel safe. She wouldn’t have to worry about Fenrir Greyback anymore thanks to this. She wanted to curl up in his arms, to nuzzle her head into his chest and feel his secure embrace. She wanted to feel his hands snake into her hair as he held her to him. She was _his_. She brought her hand up to touch the scabbed wound— only to yank it away and hiss in pain. At least it wasn’t burning like it had last night. 

Tonks returned a few minutes later with a tray of eggs, toast, water and coffee. 

“Molly made scrambled eggs just for you” she said cheerily

She thrust the tray into Mia’s lap, and then sat on the edge of the bed. Mia set the tray aside, looking to Tonks intently.

“How is he? He had a full transformation last night…”

Tonks sighed as she picked at a loose thread on the quilt. “He’s in rough shape. It was a bad one— Molly and Susan are bandaging him up”

“I need to go down there!”

Mia made to stand once again, Tonks jumping up and blocking her. 

“Whoa whoa whoa— you need to wait!” Tonks ordered.

“Tonks…”

“Eat your breakfast, I’ll see if one of the guys can help you get down to him— but _only_ after you eat”

“Fine” Mia grumbled, taking a bite of her toast with contempt. 

Tonks flashed a smile. “Excellent— I’ll be back” 

Tonks kicked the dresser on her way out on accident, swearing loudly as the mirror attached rattled. Mia couldn’t help but laugh at her clumsiness, for an Auror she was much like a bull in a china closet.

Mia ate her tray, feeling surprisingly ravenous for how nauseas she was. She lay in bed next to the empty breakfast tray staring at the ceiling, beginning to get impatient. An hour went by since Tonks said she would come back, and she needed to see Remus. She felt a stronger urge to be close to him than typical, needing to feel his skin against hers as she loved him. A heat burned between her legs just thinking of it— was this a side effect of the mark? Her fever seemed to get worse; she had spent the last hour shifting from on top of the blankets to underneath them— one minute she’d be shivering, then the next she would be burning up.

Bile rose in her throat; Mia grabbed the Chudley Cannons wastebasket next to the bed and heaved into it a few times, the contents of her stomach emptying into the receptacle. She swore under her breath before vanishing the sick with a wave of her hand. She sat back against the headboard with the can between her knees, groaning as she pushed her fly away hairs off her damp forehead. She heard footsteps coming down the hall, stopping just outside the room. Tonks opened the door slowly and entered the room with Susan, who was carrying a tray of potions.

“It’s about time!” Mia growled irritably “You guys taking me down to the cellar?”

“No, Arthur and Kingsley are getting him up here” Susan said, setting her potion tray down on the dresser “He said you will get worse before you get better— we thought you’d be more comfortable up here.”

Mia set the wastebasket on the nightstand next to her, sitting up straighter. She turned and looked at herself in the mirror quickly, wishing she didn’t look quite so sick. She heard shuffling in the hallway, succeeded by Remus shuffling into the bedroom supported by Kingsley and Arthur. Mia gasped when she saw the state he was in; his right forearm wrapped in gauze from his wrist to his elbow. His skin looked as pale and sickly as Mia’s did and his under-eye shadows just as dark. She was certain she hadn’t seen him look this ill after a transformation in a long time— maybe ever. She opened her mouth to speak, but instead grabbed the wastebasket and heaved into it a couple times.

“Look what I did to you— look how sick you are” Remus said with a sad expression.

“I’m alright” Mia said weakly “How are you feeling?”/p>

Mia vanished the sick with a wave of her hand again and set aside the can. Kingsley helped Remus lay on the bed next to her, groaning as he adjusted his weight.

“I’m alright” he said.

They both chuckled, knowing neither of them truly felt alright. He grasped his side and winced, Susan bustling over to him and lifting his shirt.

“Susan, I’m fine…” he protested, swatting her hand away.

“I’m just checking to make sure you aren’t bleeding again, calm down” she said as she inspected the bandage. “Looks alright— Penelope sent an owl; her and Eric are coming this afternoon”

Remus muttered something inaudible but undoubtedly sarcastic under his breath at the mention of Eric. Susan rattled around in her assortment of potions, plucking a couple vials from the tray and handing them to Remus.

“Sleeping draught and a pain potion— you need to sleep off the worst part of this” she ordered

“No,” he grumbled “I don’t want to sleep while she is sick”

“It’s a small one, only about 4 hours, take it—” she said “Molly’s orders”

“It’s alright” Mia said gently, giving him a small smile “I’ll be here when you wake; you need the rest”

He sighed heavily before downing his vials, drifting off to sleep about a minute later. Mia shifted to lay closer to him, but was interrupted by the urge to vomit, sitting up sharply and making use of the wastebasket again. Susan felt her forehead and cheeks, frowning.

“I’m going to have Penelope bring a thermometer.” She said “Lay back sweetie, I’ll get you some cool washcloths”

 

Penelope and Eric arrived mid-afternoon; bringing bags of chips and candy that Mia wanted nothing to do with. She had proceeded to start vomiting every few minutes, making good use of the wastebasket. Her fever seemed to be climbing, her skin sticky and damp as her head felt like it was on fire, but her body shivering profusely. Remus had woken from his nap, now sitting up against the headboard, still weak and sickly from the transformation.

“I brought the thermometer” Penelope said, digging into her purse “Open up— put this under your tongue”

Mia lifted her tongue as Penelope inserted the glass thermometer in her mouth, holding it for her as they waited for it to read her temperature.

“My dad got the flu over Christmas when I was 6—“ Eric said “You look as bad as he did.”

Mia chuckled awkwardly with the glass tube under her tongue, unable to respond. After a minute, Penelope yanked it out, rolling it between her fingers as she read her temperature.

“103” she said “let’s hope it doesn’t go any higher— here, drink some water”

“Anything that goes in comes back up” Mia said, shaking her head.

“You need to stay hydrated— drink it”

A few minutes after Mia consumed her glass of water, she heaved it into the wastebasket. They had tried to all play cards to keep her distracted, but after another hour she wasn’t able to focus she was getting so much sicker. The bedroom had become a full house; Arthur was discussing car engines with Eric as Kingsley and Tonks were in a poker game with Remus. Penelope rotated washcloths on Mia’s forehead, chest and neck while Susan and Molly were downstairs cooking dinner for everyone.

“I can’t believe your _still_ puking” Kingsley said, shaking his head

“I look worse than I feel” Mia said sarcastically between heaves.

“Really?” Penelope asked, not picking up on her sarcasm.

“No, I was bit by a fucking werewolf last night— I feel like shit”

She received a few awkward chuckles from people around the room, and a guilty frown from Remus as he intertwined his fingers with hers

“How long has she been vomiting for?” Arthur asked Penelope quietly

“A few hours— she can’t keep anything down” Penelope said “Her temperature was 103 about 2 hours ago, I should check it again”

Penelope grabbed the glass thermometer off the dresser, instructing Mia to place it under her tongue again. Arthur looked at the device with immense curiosity.

“Muggles use these things often?” He looked over Penelope’s shoulder “How does it work, exactly?”

Penelope explained the uses and functions of the thermometer to Arthur as his eyes lit up with interest. Kingsley began muttering jokes to Remus and Tonks about Arthur’s obsession with muggle contraptions.

“See, and now we can read her temp— <>shit!” Penelope shook her head “105, her temperature is climbing— Remus, when is her fever supposed to break?”

“It should start going back down around now, but since Mia is human, her reaction to the mark might be more severe than a werewolf’s would,” He said heavily “I was worried she’d react badly to this…”

“Can I have another washcloth?” Mia interrupted, outstretching her hand.

Penelope obliged, plucking a fresh washcloth from a bucket of ice and wringing it out a few times. Mia laid the cloth over her chest, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

“I’ll get Molly to brew some willow bark tea— it works great for fevers” Arthur said, making his way out of the bedroom.

Molly and Susan made their way upstairs a half hour later with a piping pot of tea and sandwiches for everyone. A few idle conversations were going on in various parts of the room as Mia sipped on her tea. The willow bark tea came right back up into the wastebasket, and by the time everyone had finished their sandwiches, her fever climbed up to 106 degrees. Susan placed another cold cloth on Mia’s forehead, looking worried

“Remus she is getting worse, what should we do?”

“The fever should’ve broken by now, I’m not sure why it hasn’t” he said, his brow furrowing.

“Ask Miranda to bring me home some ice cream” Mia mumbled “Chocolate, please”

Everyone exchanged glances as the room fell silent. Penelope put a hand on Mia’s shoulder, shaking her gently.

“Mia, what are you talking about?” she asked, furrowing her brow at Mia then to Remus.

“Daaaaaad!” she whined “I won’t spoil dinner, I promise!” 

“She’s delirious— get her into a cold shower, _now!_ ” Remus ordered “someone, please, I can’t—“”

“I got her—” Eric scooped her up off the bed, her arms and legs dangling limply like a rag doll “Bathroom?”

“Down the hall, on the right” Molly said, pointing.

Eric dashed down the hall, bustling into the small bathroom and turning the shower on cold. He stepped into the shower with Mia, the cold water hitting both of them like a ton of bricks. Mia shrieked as the water hit her, near convulsing in Eric’s arms.

“IT’S COLD!” she screamed

“I know, I know— just relax” he said soothingly, sitting down on the shower floor “this fever needs to break”

Their clothes were soaking wet as the shower pounded ice cold water over both of them. Penelope emerged into the bathroom, sitting down on the toilet. 

“Thank you” Penelope said with a small, grateful smile “Thank for doing this”

“Yeah, of course” he said through chattering teeth “Hey, Mia, how you feeling? Better yet?”

“I feel cold” she grumbled

“Good, cold is good” Eric said, flashing a pearly while smile at Penelope. “Just a few more minutes, alright?”

 

The cold shower worked like a charm; Mia’s fever started going down, and her vomiting had ceased. She was able to eat a few crackers without heaving them into the wastebasket. The sun had now set, a just past full moon rising over the grounds of the Burrow that shined into Charlie’s bedroom. Penelope grinned at the thermometer as Arthur peered over her shoulder curiously.

“99.1— just about normal” she said happily.

“So fascinating…” Arthur whispered “Penelope, may I see that…?”

Penelope handed Arthur the glass tube, chuckling as she watched him study it like it was an ancient artifact.

“Sweetheart, how are you feeling?” Susan asked

“I’m feeling much better” Mia said, “not 100%, but better”

“Good— how about trying to eat something heavier? A sandwich?”

“Sure”

Susan exited the room, her footsteps thunking softly down the stairs. Kingsley, Tonks, Eric and Penelope all bid their goodbyes for the night, for it was getting late. Arthur chased Eric down the stairs, asking him a ‘quick question’ about carburetors and their function for vehicles. The room was oddly quiet without the many idle conversations that went on throughout the day; Mia almost missed the chatter, but was thankful to finally get a moment alone with Remus for the first time since last night. She looked him up and down, a heat burning between her legs as she imagined herself sliding up and down him. She almost smacked herself— how could she be _this_ in the mood when she just stopped vomiting her guts out?

“You had me worried for a moment today” he said “I didn’t realize how much sicker you would be than a werewolf”

“Hey, you did try to warn me somewhat” she chuckled “I don’t think I’ve ever felt that bad”

“Your fever alone could’ve killed you, I am so sorry…”

“Do not apologize” Mia said firmly “do not apologize for doing this because I am so _so_ thankful that you did.”

Remus looked at her with a sad smile, his hand coming up to cup her cheek gently.

“Do you know _just how much_ I love you?”

“Yes” she giggled

“No,” he said with a soft chuckle, his thumb stroking her bottom lip “I’m not sure you do”

She rolled her eyes at him as she shifted to look at him better. She felt almost as if there was an invisible tether between them, drawing her closer to him.

“So… when do we know if it took?”

“It took.” He said simply.

“How do we know?”

“Because I can smell it— trust me, it took. Quite well, I might add”

Mia sniffed herself awkwardly, feeling a little self-conscious. Did she smell good to him? Could humans smell the change as well? 

“Any other side effects of this mark I should be aware of?”

“Well, some symptoms of lycanthropy like we talked about; grumpiness close to the full moon, a liking for rarer steaks…”

“No— no rare steaks for me, not happening” she grimaced

“mhmm” he hummed with a small smirk “It’s not for sure what you will experience, we’ll have to wait and see. Oh, and you might be a touch insatiable for the first month…”

“That explains it—“she laughed “I thought I was the only person who could be this in the mood after nearly dying of a fever”

“I thought I smelled that too” An eager grin spread across his face as his fingertips traced the waistline of her shorts “you know, I could help…” he said slyly

Her heart leapt; she wanted him so bad, she needed him. “Please do” she breathed.

She threw her head back as his and slipped into her underwear, wondering if she could possibly love him anymore than she did right now.

* * *

Remus opened and closed the engagement ring box a few times as he was preparing to leave for the Weasleys. They had their final meeting today before they moved Harry in a couple days, which Molly helped him plan— what he hoped— would be the perfect marriage proposal. His plan of getting Mia to have to work that evening was going to work perfect; she would apparate straight to the Burrow since she would be ‘late’, and Molly would get the ball rolling for him. He knew she was going to say yes, but he didn’t want it to be any less perfect— no, she deserved perfection. He looked at himself in the mirror adjusting his hair that, to his dismay, looked like a few more gray hairs had appeared since the last time he studied himself this hard. He looked at his watch, hastily stuffed the ring box in his pants pocket, and hustled out of the bedroom.

“Good luck, you look great!” Penelope called from the couch.

“Thanks- everything set here?”

“Yes, don’t worry, now go! Don’t come back without her and that ring on her finger!”

He apparated to the Burrow and was swarmed by Molly and Susan fixing his disheveled hair and collar.

“Remus, everything is set, all you have to do is wait!” Molly said cheerily. “Are you ok if the Order watches? Everyone wants to be a part of it.” 

He looked to see everyone standing in the kitchen, all grinning at him. Even Moody looked to have a hint of a smile, which Remus couldn’t remember ever seeing Moody look happy.

“That’s fine with me” he smiled, nodding to everyone.

“Ok, you lot, go out into the garden but hide yourselves! Don’t let her see you when she arrives!” Molly barked. “You too, Susan”

Susan nodded, and then turned to Remus kissed his cheek. “Good luck— not that you need it”

“Go, go, she should be here any minute!!” Molly ushered her out. “Remus, I have the letters set, I’ll greet her— go into the garden and stand where the candles form a circle.”

“Molly— thank you, for all of this…”

“yes, yes— now go! _Hurry!_ ”

 

Mia’s feet hit the ground at the Burrow, and hustled quickly to the front door. She knocked loudly, bouncing on her heels and checking her watch anxiously. She was a half hour late for the scheduled meeting time, and was expecting a lecture from Moody on punctuality and constant vigilance. Molly opened the door, ushering her into a surprisingly quiet and empty house. She looked at the Weasley matriarch puzzled.

“Where is everyone?” she asked slowly

“Alastor pushed the meeting back since you were going to be late. They’ll be here soon.”

Molly put an arm around her and leading her into the dining room. Mia craned her neck to look around, her eyes roaming the entire house looking for at least one other person.

“I’m surprised Remus didn’t send me a patronus … Even Arthur isn’t here?”.

“He ran an errand for me, he’ll be back” 

She motioned for her to sit in front of a large silver envelope placed at the head of the table. The envelope had her name scrawled across it in shimmering purple ink, and was heavy when she picked it up. She gave Molly another puzzled look, her brows knitting together.

“Open it, Mia” she said, smiling.

She obliged, opening the envelope slowly. A small skeleton key fell out, clanking softly on the table. She reached for it, but Molly stopped her.

“Read the letter first”

Mia looked at her skeptically, then unfolded the parchment and began to read.

_The first moment I laid eyes on you I was immediately drawn to you. I paced in my office, wondering who the beautiful girl from the train was, but tried to remind myself that I couldn’t get hung up on the pretty face of a student. 7th year’s class was my favorite to teach; I would get butterflies at thinking of the beautiful Ravenclaw that I would get to be in the same room with for an hour. Seeing your name on my detention’s roster gave me so much excitement, but I told myself it was just detention, that I couldn’t continue to get caught up in the beautiful girl whose smile made me weak at the knees. I was your teacher, after all._

_I should’ve been more ashamed of what happened that first night in the classroom, but I wasn’t. I knew we were screwed if we were caught, but part of me didn’t care. I was drawn to you like a magnet, as much as I told you we couldn’t continue I didn’t want it to stop. I fell in love with your laugh, your smile, your sense of humor. You made me feel feelings I couldn’t’ve, at the time, put into words. I am forever grateful for that year I spent at Hogwarts, because it led me to you._

_Pick up the skeleton key, it’s a portkey._

Mia looked up at Molly, her expression radiating with happiness. “Pick up the key, dear”

Mia swallowed, feeling slightly confused. She grabbed the key, and felt herself beginning to spin. After a moment, she felt her feet hit the ground, and she was outside Remus’s cottage, another silver envelope taped to one of the support beams of the sloping porch. She looked around for him, but he was nowhere to be found. The lake was calm and smooth as glass, the half-moon just barely raised in the sky as the horizon glowed the faintest hint of red, the final few minutes of daylight close to expiration. She reached for the envelope and tore it open, another skeleton key falling out, making a light thunk as it hit the ground. She pulled out another letter, scrawled in the same shimmering purple ink.

_This is the place where you saved me from myself. I thought I couldn’t have you, couldn’t have what we have now. I thought I would hold you back, so I let you go. I spent months in this ramshackle little cottage, living inside a bottle of scotch until the day you and Penelope busted down my door, changing my life for the better. You coming back into my life showed me just how much I needed you; you were the light in the darkness of my mind, the calm in my storm. Many nights throughout my life, I wished I were dead rather than be what I am, but being with you, death is not a friend that I welcome. You have given me something and someone to live for._

Mia felt a tear slide down her cheek as she grabbed ahold of the second skeleton key, feeling her feet lift off the ground. She squeezed her eyes shut as she felt herself flying through the air again, curious as to where she would end up next. When her feet hit the ground, she was surprised to open her eyes to the living room of her flat, Penelope holding another silver envelope.

“Penny—” she asked

“Open the envelope” Penelope said, smiling warmly.

“What is all this?”

“Just shut up and take the envelope”

She grabbed the envelope from her and tore it open, not surprised to hear the clank of another skeleton key on the floor.

_This is the place where we grew the most. We went through some of the happiest times, and some of the darkest times inside the walls of this flat. I watched you grow into the amazing woman you are today, and I watched you suffer some of the greatest loses of your life. I stood with you as your life’s storm consumed you, waiting for the weather to break and you to find yourself again. Even when we were apart, I was always with you, waiting in the shadows for the moment that you needed me. I fell deeper in love with you inside these walls than I ever thought possible. I love you, Amelia Roswell. I love you more today than I did yesterday, but less than I will tomorrow. I will love you forever, I will love you always._

Mia began to cry large, fat happy tears as she read the third letter. She looked up at Penelope, who had tears of her own glistening in the corners of her eyes.

“Take the portkey” she whispered, smiling.

Mia sniffed and wiped her tears, folding the letter and stuffing it in her pocket with the other two. She grabbed the key, her feet lifting off the floor once more. She opened her eyes to a scene of gorgeous summer flowers that she recognized as the Burrow’s garden. There were candles lit, forming a pathway around the corner from where she landed. She looked around for another envelope, unable to find one. She walked forward, following the lighted path around the corner to find Remus standing in the middle of a circle, outlined with gorgeous rose bushes and more candles, illuminating the scene with a romantic glow. Remus stood there with his hands in his pockets, dressed in his best suit, his smile spreading wide as he saw her come into view. Finally it clicked in her brain— she understood what this all was.

“Remus…” she said softly, tears flowing down her cheeks.

She walked up to him, her hands running up his chest, feeling the stiff material of his suit. He cupped her face with his hands and pressed his forehead against hers, taking a breath before speaking.

“This is the place where I pledge my life to you, to make good on my promise to love you forever, and to love you always” 

He settled himself down on one knee and pulling a small black velvet box out of his pocket. He opened the box to reveal a teardrop shaped diamond set on a thin, silver band. Mia’s hand came up to her mouth as a few more tears escaped.

“Amelia Evelyn Roswell, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

She let out a sob and nodded furiously “yes” she choked, tears streaming freely now as she smiled wide. “Yes yes yes a million times _yes!_ ”

He smiled ear to ear as he slid the ring on her finger. The members of the Order stepped into view from their hiding spots, clapping and cheering loudly. Mia threw her arms around him as he lifted her off the ground, kissing her firmly. 

“Cheers to the happy couple!” Fred called 

The twins lit off some of the joke shop’s fireworks, the sky illuminated with bursts of white, blue, purple and green.

“I love you I love you I love you” she whispered

She kissed him over and over, peppering his lips and cheeks with affection. Everyone embraced them, staring a giant group hug that made Mia feel the most loved that she had in her entire life. She continued to sob happy tears, feeling as if she was floating on cloud nine.

“Well, this is nice and all….” Moody gruffed, “but we really need to start the meeting”

Mia could’ve sworn she saw Moody wipe a tear from his one good eye as he tried furiously to conceal a smile. They all made their way back inside, her hand intertwined with Remus’s, her mind happy and heart full.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> low key wishing my husband was this romantic


	48. chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter jumps perspective a few times, I hope this doesn't make it too chaotic to read!

“No, no— absolutely not” Harry said as he surveyed the group “I won’t allow you to risk your lives for me”

“Everyone here is of age, Potter” Moody growled “they know the risks, and are free to choose”

16 people stood in the living room of 4 Privet Drive, 7 of which ready to take polyjuice potion to transform into a carbon copy of Harry Potter himself.

“Having 8 of you instead of 1 really is a brilliant plan…” Tonks said reassuringly.

He sighed, looking amongst the group of people who had become his best friends and family. Remus clasped a hand on his shoulder, giving him a confident nod.

“They don’t know you’re being moved tonight— this is simply a precaution”

Hermione came up behind Harry and clipped a lock of his hair as George divided up 7 cups of polyjuice potion. He glowered at her as he grasped the back of his head, muttering under his breath as she and the rest of the decoys all added his hair to their cups. The potion bubbled for a moment, and then turned a bright, brilliant shade of gold.

“Bottoms up!” Fred and George called in unison.

“Wow Harry, you look much more delicious than Crabbe or Goyle did!” Hermione said, downing a large gulp of her potion.

Everyone followed her lead, taking a hearty swig. Mia felt the thick potion go all the way down her throat and into her stomach, its viscosity extremely off-putting. She took another swig, forcing herself to choke it down before she began to feel the effects of the potion. Her entire body prickled with an uncomfortable chill as she watched her hands morph before her eyes into hands that resembled Harry’s. She reached up and felt her hair; it was short, thick, and felt completely foreign to her. She felt her neck— no bite scar, no mark. She looked around at the numerous Harry’s before her, all feeling their own faces and hair in awe. They were all identical.

“Bill, don’t ‘ook at me— I’m ‘ideous!” Fleur gasped

“Alright, get changed into these clothes!” Moody barked as he threw a large sack in the middle of the group “and don’t forget the glasses!”

The seven fake Harrys changed quickly into identical outfits, stripping without any regard of showing off Harry’s birthday suit to the others. 

“I knew Ginny was lying about your tattoo, Harry!” Ron called as he examined his bare chest.

Mia instinctively reached for the gold band on her wrist, wondering if she should take it off so she was truly identical with the others. The jacket they were all wearing was long sleeved, so she decided against it and just yanked the sleeve down over it. She tugged at her engagement ring, taking a few seconds to wrench it off; Harry’s fingers were thicker than hers.

“Now, Susan and Mia, your portkey to the Burrow from is first to activate— make sure you don’t miss it” Moody ordered.

“I’ve got the whisk sitting on my coffee table, its ready to go” Susan said, nodding in return.

Moody grabbed his broom as Mundungus slinked towards him apathetically. “I’ll see you all in about an hour— remember; constant vigilance!” 

Mia stepped over to Remus, handing him her dainty, glinting ring.

“Hold onto this for me? Keep it safe?”

“I can do that” he said with a small smile.

“Kiss me for good luck?”

She snaked her arms around him, his expression twisting.

“Ah— I don’t think so…” he said with an awkward chuckle. 

“Oh, shut up and kiss me!”

She crashed her lips against his, his body stiffening. The group all cringed at the sight of ‘Harry’ kissing Remus on the mouth, a few audible groans going around.

“Bloody hell…” Ron said as he shielded his eyes

“That isn’t something I thought I’d ever see” Hermione whispered, her face twisting in horror.

“Ack! we’re not doing that again until the potion wears off!” Remus growled, wiping his mouth roughly.

Mia winked at him and grinned “I’ll see you at the Burrow”

She sauntered off to her mother standing ready by the door, broomstick in hand. Susan smirked at her, shaking her head slightly.

“You’re terrible” she whispered.

Mia shrugged and smiled a devilish grin “it’s fun to watch him squirm”

They all stepped out onto the lawn of 4 Privet Drive, mounting their broomsticks and thestrals as Harry and Hagrid got situated on the flying motorbike. Mia frowned as she watched Harry climb into the passenger car— that had been Sirius’s motorbike. Remus had shown her pictures of him and James riding on the back of the charmed muggle vehicle, the wind whipping their hair as Sirius laughed over and over in the pictures infinite loop. She wondered if Sirius were here today, would he be the one piloting Harry to safety? Her heart panged, longing for her best friend to wrap his arm around her and flash his signature toothy, mischievous smile. She looked to Remus, feeling comfort in his small smile as he nodded reassuringly to her. Mia nodded in return as she gripped the broom tight with her left hand as her wand was in her right, at the ready just in case. They kicked off, rising high above Little Whinging to make their journey to their portkey at Susan’s house.

Once in the air, they were swarmed; at least 30 Death Eaters began shooting curses left and right as the Harrys and their protectors began to scatter. Susan sped her broom up, the wind whipping Mia’s face as they zipped through the air. Mia saw Voldemort himself tailing them, jets of green light shooting from his wand as Susan weaved through the air. He was flying unaided, almost as if he was riding on a billowing black cloud.

“What the hell is this??” Mia screamed over the commotion, blocking and sending hexes every which way.

“We were betrayed!” Susan hissed “hang on!”

Mia sent hex after hex at Voldemort, missing him by a couple feet each time. Voldemort made a sharp turn, Moody and Mundungus speeding away and dodging curses as they saw the black cloud speed after them. Jets of light from other Death Eaters were whizzing past them, Mia and Susan throwing up shield after shield to deflect the ones bound to hit them. 

“Mum, he can fly! Voldemort can fly!” Mia cried, her voice muffled by the howl of the rushing wind.

Mia gasped when she saw the familiar faces of Andrew Flint, Trevor Greentree and Michael Bobbitt amongst the swarm, their faces blank and movements robotic. _They must be under the imperius curse…_ she thought as she deflected one of Trevor’s spells. As much as she resented the three of them for the trouble in her 7th year at Hogwarts, she didn’t want to kill them. They were all pieces of work, but not true Death Eater material. She deflected their spells as much as she could; only sending bat bogey hexes and slug vomiting jinxes at the three of them. Susan sped towards her London home as the three former classmates became the least of their problems, ambushed by another 4 Death Eaters in masks. More jets of light came shooting towards them, and Mia felt a searing white hot heat streak across her thigh. She screamed out in agony, nearly losing her balance.

“What’s wrong?!” Susan barked

“I’m fine; keep going!”

Her left thigh had a large, bleeding gash as wide as her palm, looking to have been hit with a severing charm. She forced herself to ignore it, to focus on fighting. Her leg throbbed, the pain making her sick. She deflected spell after spell, sneaking in hexes until her wand went flying out of her hand, a Death Eater disarming her. She saw a jet of green light coming straight for her; she leaned as far as possible to one side to avoid the hit. The curse just barely missed her, but she leaned too far, losing her balance and sliding off her broomstick.

“MIA!”

“MUM!”

She watched helplessly as Susan on her broomstick tried to make a dive, but had to stop to dodge multiple killing curses shooting her way. As Susan grew smaller and smaller, Mia only heard the rush of wind in her ears as she fell through the sky.

* * *

“Dora!!” Kingsley called as Tonks and Ron flew through the wards of the Burrow.

“Kingsley, my love!” she hollered.

They ran to each other, but instead of embracing, they stopped a couple feet from each other and paused. He drew his wand and pointed it at her, and she in return. His hand shook slightly as he spoke, his voice much higher and constricted than normal.

“What did I want to name our son if he had been a girl?”

“Sophorina” Tonks said “and I told you absolutely not— that it was as bad as Nymphadora”

Kingsley lowered his wand as she ran to him. He swept her into a tight embrace and kissed her cheek, lifting her off the ground and spinning her around once before setting her back down. He pushed her violet hair out of her face as he planned a kiss on her lips.

“What kept you??” he asked breathlessly.

“Bellatrix was tailing us, I think she wants me dead just as much as Voldemort wants Harry. We missed our portkey at Auntie Muriel’s so we had to fly back— Are the others back yet?”

“We’re still waiting on Mia, Susan, Bill and Fleur”

Kingsley and Tonks turned their attention to the skies, Tonks biting her lip nervously. She took Kingsley’s hand, “Mia and Susan were supposed to be back first…” she muttered softly

“I know— George was injured, his ear was hexed off. He’s alright, but Molly can’t regrow it” he said “took Remus everything he had to hold him on the broom still”

Tonks looked around and saw Remus pacing back and forth, gaze fixed at the sky. “And Harry?”

“Safe, inside with the others”

Bill and Fleur appeared, tears flowing down Fleur’s face as they clutched their portkey. Bill and Kingsley pointed their wands at each other as Bill stepped in front of Fleur protectively.

“What did I give your son as a gift on the day he was born?” Bill asked

“A stuffed elephant— he loves it, by the way” Kingsley replied

They lowered their wands, Bill’s scarred face twisting. “Mad-Eye is dead— Mundungus took one look at Voldemort and disapparated. Mad-eye was hit and fell off his broom”

Tonks let out a squeak, burying her face into Kingsley’s shoulders. Kingsley nodded stiffly, clenching his jaw as he wrapped his arm around her.

“George is injured, he’s inside if you want to see him.”

Across the grounds from them, Remus felt like he was going to hurl. His golden bracelet was his lifeline to Mia; he was overly aware of the soft vibration against his skin. The feeling was comforting and sickening all at once, as he knew she was still alive but unsafe. He paced up and down the yard, staring at the sky, willing her and Susan to come flying though the wards. _Come on come on come on_ he prayed over and over, checking his watch every thirty seconds, counting the minutes that they were late. He felt initial relief to see a broom come flying in, but his stomach dropped when he saw there was only one rider.

“Susan!” Molly cried as she landed “What happened, where’s Mia?” 

Susan was near hysterical, unable to speak. Her whole body shook as she dismounted and dropped to her knees. Remus drew his wand and ran towards her, his heart pounding in his ears. He pushed his wand at her throat, his knuckles white from gripping so tight.

“What did you tell me when I asked you for Mia’s hand?”

Susan just sobbed, unable to answer right away.

“ANSWER ME!” he roared

“Remus, give her a moment, she’s hysterical…” Molly said

His face was turning purple as he gritted his teeth impatiently. Susan took a few gasps for air, forcing a few words between sobs.

“It’s— about— damn— t-time!” She choked

Remus took a breath and put his wand back in his pocket.

“Where is she?”

“She— she”

“SUSAN!” Remus snapped, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her.

“SHE FELL!”

“She fell— what do you mean she fell?” Tonks asked, putting a hand on Susan’s shoulder.

“She was disarmed, then she— she leaned to avoid a— a killing curse and she— she—” Susan sobbed, throwing her face into her hands “she lost her balance and fell!”

“AND YOU JUST LEFT HER???” Remus yelled 

“I LOOKED EVERYWHERE!” she screamed at him “Why do you think I missed the portkey?!”

Remus gripped his hair with both hands as his whole body began to shake. He felt like the ground beneath him was spinning; he turned away from the group, making it a couple paces away before bending over and hurling. Anger flooded him as he turned back to Susan, she still sobbing uncontrollably.

“She was supposed to be safe with you!” He hissed angrily “How could you let this happen?”

Molly stepped between them, wagging her finger sternly at him.

“Remus— _Enough!_ You’re not helping!” 

* * *

_Shit shit shit!_

Mia dropped through the air, gaining speed as the ground came closer and closer into view. She didn’t have a wand; she was panicking, knowing very well if she hit the ground she was done for. Stop yourself she thought, wondering if she could save herself wandless. Adrenaline coursed through her as she threw her hands out in front of her, hoping for a miracle. She squeezed her eyes shut, bracing for impact.

“ARESTO MOMENTUM!” 

The impact never came; she slowed to a halt three feet above the ground, hovering for a moment before she felt herself settle gently onto grass. Her heart was pounding in her ears as she rolled over, looking up at the sky to find it eerily calm and quiet. She then looked around, seeing soccer goals spaced out around her, realizing she landed in a sports field. Her leg throbbed and seared, her blood warm as it soaked down her jeans that now were too large for her. She reached up and felt her hair, long and smooth again. She tried to stand, but cried out and collapsed when she put weight onto her left leg.

 _Think Mia, think._ She tore her jacket off and wrapped the sleeves around her leg, tying it tight to tourniquet her wound. She looked at her right wrist; the gold band was not vibrating. She prayed that Remus was safe at the Burrow, not dead. _If I could stop myself, maybe I can heal myself._ She hadn’t attempted any magic this complex wandless before, but she had to do something. She held her hands over the large wound,

“Episky!” she cried, but nothing happened “ _goddammit_ — EPISKY!”

She grunted in frustration and looked up at the starry sky. She felt woozy and nauseas as her leg throbbed in time with her heartbeat, the stars spinning slightly before her.

_I’m so fucked._

* * *

“Somebody needs to retrieve their bodies…” Tonks said softly

“Mia’s not dead— yet, at least” Remus snarled 

He shot Susan a sideways glance and held up his vibrating bracelet.

“Bodies, what do you mean bodies?” Susan asked through her sniffles.

Kingsley kneeled beside her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“Susie… Mad- Eye is dead.” he said gently.

Susan let out a mournful wail; Moody had been her mentor, her first partner on the force. Kingsley hugged her tightly as she buried her face into his shoulder. Bill kissed Fleur on the cheek, and then picked up one of the broomsticks lying in the middle of the yard.

“I’ll go and get Mad-Eye’s body” he offered.

“Take Fred with you” Arthur nodded to him “Remus, let’s go find Mia; Susan, around where did you lose her?”

“Near the sports park, but we might’ve also been over the forest” Susan sniffed “Let me go with you”

“No— you’ve done enough!” Remus snapped irritably.

Remus mounted his brook and kicked off, Arthur giving Susan an apologetic look as he took off after him. Susan’s sobs started back up again, Molly rubbed her back and whispered soothingly to her.

“It’s not your fault, shhhh, she’ll be alright…” 

“Susie, I have to get back to the prime minister; I’ll check in in the morning.” Kingsley said, scanning the sky one last time. Dora, send me a patronus if they find her before then” 

“Will do” Tonks said, kissing his cheek.

“Hey—“ Kingsley turned back to Susan, giving her a small smile “she’s tough, put your faith in her— she is your daughter, after all”

She nodded, choking on a breath as she wiped her face. Everyone watched Kingsley disapparate, leaving behind the sound of Susan’s sobs in the middle of the lawn.

* * *

Mia lay in the soccer field for what felt like an eternity, racking her brain on how she was going to get to the Burrow. She had originally ruled out apparating, knowing she would most likely splinch herself if she tried due to her weakened state, but it seemed like the only option. She was breathing deeply, trying to calm her mind to prepare for this dangerous trip. _You can do this_ she told herself as she took her final minute of preparation. Her leg throbbed, she felt sick, but she knew she would die here if she didn’t move. She closed her eyes and concentrated hard on the Burrow, but didn’t disapparate. She felt foggy, weak; she just wanted to rest her eyes. Just for a minute, then she’d go. She certainly wouldn’t sleep.

“Shit!” a voice said, her mind snapping back to reality “IT’S HER!”

She blinked a couple times as Arthur came in and out of focus. She wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but the moon was much higher in the sky than when she closed her eyes. He picked her up and began running with her. She struggled to keep her eyes open; she was so tired.

“Remus, I’ve got her!”

“Where’s my mum?” she slurred

“Ohmygod her leg!” she heard Remus shout.

“She’s bleeding bad, no time to waste; we need to apparate back”

The last thing she remembered is the familiar tug behind her navel, her eyes much too heavy to keep open.

* * *

Opening her eyes, Mia was slightly disoriented as the living room of the Burrow came into focus. Her mouth felt dry and stale, her body stiff as if she hadn’t moved in days. She adjusted herself, noticing her thigh bandaged and propped up with a couple hand crocheted throw pillows. She was dressed in a tank top and shorts that weren’t hers, she assuming they must be Ginny’s. She turned her head to see Remus, his eyes bloodshot and face pale and unshaven, looking very much relieved.

“She’s awake!” he called “Mia, how are you feeling?”

“You look like shit” she grumbled, blinking at him a few times.

Remus chuckled, his eyes twinkling at her. “Well, I can’t say you look your best either”

“Oh, my sweet girl!”

Susan ran into the room, throwing her arms around Mia and beginning to sob.

“Mum…” Mia said, her voice muffled from Susan’s tight embrace.

“I thought I had lost you…”

“It’s alright, I saw them start shooting curses at you when I fell, you had to stay focused or they’d have gotten you”

“I’ll never forgive myself…”

“MUM! It’s not your fault!” Mia growled, sitting up in an attempt to stand.

“Don’t stand up, my dear” Molly said as she bustled around the couch “Your leg isn’t strong enough yet.”

“You couldn’t heal it?”

“It was hit with dark magic, it’s going to take a couple weeks to heal fully, and you’ll need to take special potions 3 times a day.” 

“I lost my wand, they disarmed me and it went flying…”

“I found it” Susan said. She pulled out Mia’s acacia wood wand from the pocket of her robes and handed it to her. “Took me hours, but I was always very good at summoning charms. I wish we had the same luck with Mad-Eye, though”

“What do you mean?” Mia asked, her brow furrowing

“We lost Mad-Eye, Mundungus apparated when he saw Voldemort and he was killed as a result. Bill and Fred couldn’t recover his body.” Susan said sadly.

“ _Fucking Mundungus!_ — Mum, I’m so sorry, I know how much he meant to you…”

“It’s alright, sweetie. You know what he would say if he were here; constant vigilance, and learn from his death.” Susan said, mustering up a small, fake smile.

Mia sighed heavily; Sirius, her father, Dumbledore, Moody— how many more would have to die?

“How long have I been out for?”

“Two days” Remus said

“ _Two days?!_ I had to work yesterday— _shit_ I have to work today, _shit shit shit!_ ”

“Don’t worry, it's ok” he said calmly. “Susan told Delphinus you had an accident and needed the week off.”

“No, I can’t miss that many days of work!” she said, sitting up and swinging her good leg around to stand. “What time is it?”

“Mia, don’t stand up!” Remus barked

She didn’t listen, and let out a shriek as she collapsed under the weight the weight of her injured leg, the pain feeling like her entire leg was splitting in half down to her ankle. 

“I told you not to stand up” he growled as he picked her up and set her onto the couch. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

Mia crossed her arms and turned her nose up. “I can’t believe you let me sleep two days.”

“Mia… how did you survive that fall without your wand? You fell over 1000 feet, you should’ve broke every bone in your body” Susan asked

“I don’t know how I did it, I just did” she said, looking at the confused faces of Remus, Susan and Molly. “I stopped myself wandless.”

“Had you been practicing that?” Remus asked, furrowing his brow

“No” she shrugged “I just did it”

“Impressive…” he whispered with a calculated expression.

“Well, however you did it, I’m thankful you are ok. Remus would’ve skinned me alive had you not made it” Susan said with a small smirk

Remus looked at her apologetically, running a hand through his hair sheepishly “I’m sorry for the way I behaved; I shouldn’t’ve gotten so angry with you…”

Susan held her hand up and shook her head “had our roles been reversed, you would’ve gotten much worse from me. No need to apologize.”

They nodded to each other smiling slightly. Mia shifted her weight groaning as he leg twanged.

“Hey— do you have my ring?” she asked

“Oh— yes I do” he pulled her ring out of his shirt pocket “here—“

He slid the ring onto her left hand, the diamond glinting in the light. Mia smiled and stroked Remus’s cheek, his stubble scratching her smooth palm.

“Well, I’ve been a little busy watching over my unconscious, injured, _pain-in-the-ass_ fiancée” he said with a coy grin

“ _Fiancée_ ” She enunciated slowly “that has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

* * *

Mia was thrilled to be home the following day; as much as she appreciated Molly’s hospitality, she just wanted to be back into her own bed. Albeit she was wishing she could get around on her own, but at least she were helpless, she would be helpless in her own flat. She couldn’t support her weight at all on her leg, needing Remus to carry her anywhere and everywhere she needed to go. He didn’t seem to mind, he never protested when she asked him to carry her to the bathroom or when she needed a snack. 

She lay in bed, left leg propped up with a mountain of pillows as Remus changed her bandage. Her gash was a nasty one; palm width and a couple inches deep, exposing tissue that should not see the light of day. At least the portion of severed flesh had been part Fenrir Greyback’s scratches on that leg, but Mia was certain one scar would be replaced with another. Remus taped up her gauze bandage, then handed her three small vials of various colors.

“Don’t want to forget to take these”

“No, I’d like to be able to walk again here soon” she said flatly, downing the three vials quickly “this shit tastes like shit” she grumbled

He laughed, crawling in bed next to her “I’m sorry about your leg.”

“Me too, I’m sorry I’m so whiny about it— I just hate being helpless”

“You are far from helpless,” he said as he twirled a strand of her hair around his finger “have I ever told you how beautiful you are?”

“Nope” she teased

“What? Never?”

His hand snuck up her shirt and cupped one of her breasts. It fit in his hand perfectly, smiling a toothy smile as her back arched instinctively.

“Nope, _never_ ” she giggled

“Well, then shame on me…”

She bit her lip as his thumb grazed her nipple. He rolled the small bit of flesh between his index finger and thumb as he nuzzled his nose against her temple, whispering words of her beauty in her ear. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes as the bite mark warmed on her neck in conjunction with her building desire. His hand slid down the front of her shorts, teasing her slit with his fingertips.

“Careful— careful of my—”

“I won’t hurt your leg,” he said huskily in her ear “just relax…”

His fingers slid into her, arching to hit her most sensitive spots. Her whimpers grew louder as he worked, a burning deep inside her driving her mad as she gripped the bedsheets underneath her.

“Will you come for me?” he asked, nibbling on her earlobe

His thumb pressed her clit, sending her over the edge with a sharp cry. As the waves of pleasure rolled through her, she forgot the pain in her leg for just a moment. He kissed her neck, nipping at her flesh from her collarbone to her jawline as she came down from her high.

“You’re beautiful, Mia Roswell— so beautiful” he purred in her ear “—the most beautiful woman in the world”


	49. chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all had a wonderful thanksgiving!

“I look _ridiculous!_ ” 

Eric scowled as he looked in the mirror, horrified at the sight of himself in aubergine dress robes. Penelope giggled as she emerged from her bedroom, dressed in a shimmering copper dress.

“You look like a wizard” she said as she kissed his cheek

“What the hell is _that?!_ ” he cried, pointing to her dress “Maaaaan, why do the girls get to wear normal clothes?”

“If you show up in a regular suit, you’ll look out of place for a wizard wedding” Remus smirked, adjusting the collar of his own gray dress robes. “Trust me; you’ll be glad to be wearing those once we arrive. You’ll still probably look the most ‘normal’ anyway.”/p>

Eric opened his mouth to ask about this, but was interrupted as Mia came limping out of her bedroom, adjusting the deep v neckline of her navy blue dress. 

“Do my tits look alright in this dress?”

“Don’t answer that” Remus growled to Eric. “Mia, you look beautiful”

Remus grabbed a cane that was sitting by the door and handed it to her. She sighed heavily, leaning her weight on the ebony stick.

“I feel frumpy” she said flatly

“You look great!” Penelope exclaimed “and your tits look fantastic.”

“I have to wear flats because I can hardly fucking walk, I had to sew the stupid slit because it came up too high and showed all the bullshit on my leg— “

“Mia, you look amazing, really” Eric said with a warm smile. 

Remus felt a flush of irritation as he gave Eric a sideways glance. He kissed the top of Mia’s head and adjusted her neckline to ensure her mark was covered.

“Alright, the portkey should activate any minute now—”

Just as he spoke, Bill and Fleur’s wedding invitation began to glow a bright gold. They positioned themselves around the envelope, ready to grab ahold. Penelope took Eric’s hand and smiled.

“Portkeys are more comfortable than apparition, I promise”

Eric chuckled “Good, I would prefer not to get squeezed half to death today”

* * *

The Burrow was decorated magnificently; waiters in gold coats were bustling around tables set up on the lawn, preparing for the reception. The ceremony space was arranged beautifully, gold and blush ribbons swooping daintily along the aisle chairs as rose pedals lined the walkway and altar. Witches and wizards were all dressed in their best, chattering away as Ron and an unfamiliar red-haired teen escorted the guests to their seats. Mia hobbled up to the ushers, gripping Remus’s bicep and leaning heavily on her cane as she limped along.

“Hey Mia, how’s your leg?” the unfamiliar boy asked.

Mia and Remus exchanged confused looks as Ron and the boy started chuckling.

“Guys, it’s me” the boy said “but you can call me Barny Weasley, for today”

“Pretty good, eh? We pulled the hair off a muggle boy in Ottery St Catchpole” Ron said, clasping a hand on who they now realized was Harry’s shoulder.

“Looking good, Potter; my leg is bullshit, thanks for asking” Mia smirked.

Harry led Mia, Remus, Eric and Penelope over to their seats, where Eric couldn’t help but look around wildly at the various fashions of the wedding guests. He spotted a couple of Fleur’s veela cousins, Penelope smacking his arm when she caught him staring too long.

“Ow, what the hell? I was just looking!” 

“Wotcher, guys!” Tonks said, bustling into the row behind them with Reggie in her arms and Kingsley next to her.

“Hey Tonks; Kingsley” Remus said

Kingsley shook Remus’s hand firmly, and then squeezed Mia’s shoulders as he kissed her cheek. He and Tonks settled in their chairs, adjusting his green dress robes that paired so nicely with his smooth, dark complexion.

“How thrilled is the Prime Minister to have Mum babysitting him for the evening?” Mia whispered, turning back to them.

“Completely thrilled; he nearly threw himself at my feet when I told him Susie was going to be covering me today.” He said with a smirk “’Shacklebolt, please— don’t leave me with that woman; she scares me’”

They all laughed as Kingsley mimed the Prime Minister begging. Tonks turned to Eric and grinned “How you holding up, Eric? You look like a wizard in those robes Mia got you”

“Fine I guess— hey, how is your hair always different every time I see you?” Eric asked. “Is there a spell for that?”

Tonks was blonde for the occasion, which was most likely the 5th or 6th different hairstyle Eric had seen her as.

“I’m a metamorphmagus!” 

She changed her hair from blonde to pink, to blue to blonde again. She cackled loudly as Eric jumped in his chair, his eyes bugging.

“He’s fun” she giggled to Kingsley.

“Shh, the wedding is starting!” Penelope whispered.

The wedding went off without a hitch, Fleur and Bill married in a beautiful, heartfelt ceremony. The look on Bill’s scarred face as Fleur walked down the aisle brought tears to most of the audience’s eyes. Once they were pronounced husband and wife, the guests all filed over to the tables for dinner and dancing. Mia hobbled helplessly, feeling self-conscious as Remus helped her into her chair. She hated being injured; she couldn’t wait until she was able to walk without the support of his arm or a cane, let alone with a limp. She had only been hobbling for the last five days, irritated that Molly thought it would be another couple weeks before she’d be back to normal.

“Ladies, what are we drinking?” Remus asked as he settled Mia into her chair “I’ll head up to the drink table.”

“Glass of red, whatever they have” Mia said with a weak smile

“The best chardonnay they have up there” Penelope said, 

Mia rolled her eyes at Penelope’s pickiness over her wine. Eric jumped up, smoothing the front of his dress robes. 

“I’ll go with you” he said

The two of them made their way to the drink table, Remus fighting the irritation he felt to be spending the entire evening in Eric’s company. When they got to the drink table, they looked through the various bottles of wine, trying to find an acceptable one for Penelope.

“So… these robe things are pretty comfortable, actually” Eric said awkwardly.

“Yeah, they’re alright” Remus replied stiffly, studying one of the bottle’s labels.

“Do you wear these much?”

“Not usually”

There was an uncomfortable pause, the tension thick between the two of them as Eric eyed Remus out of the corner of his eye.

“Listen, I think we might’ve gotten off on the wrong foot…” Eric began

Remus let out a bark of laughter “yeah, you could say that”

“Alright, I was kind of a douche and flirted with your girl in front of you, that was an asshole move. But you gotta see it from my side, man!”

“And your side is… what? You see a pretty girl who is _obviously_ with someone else, but because you have complete disregard for the world around you, you go for her anyway?” Remus said irritably, studying another bottle of wine.

“I thought you were her sugar daddy!” Eric exclaimed “The sugar daddies never last. I mean, come on, from my perspective I saw a young, gorgeous girl and a dude quite a bit older— classic sugaring”

Remus turned his head and glared at him, making Eric shift uncomfortably.

“Anyway… what I’m trying to say is I’m sorry. I was a jerk.” 

Remus sighed as he poured a glass of red, pondering what to say next. “What are your intentions with Penelope?”

“You sound like her father” Eric snickered

“Penelope is my fiancée’s best friend, and she has become like family to me. I won’t have you tossing her around”

“Nah, man, it’s not like that” Eric said sheepishly, running a hand through his spiked flaxen hair “I really like Penelope; we haven’t had that talk yet, but…”

“What talk?” Remus asked, his brow furrowing.

“You know, the talk. ‘What are we doing, what does our future look like…’” Eric said “I haven’t told her this yet, but I’m getting out of the Air Force soon— beginning of October.”

“You’ll go back to The States?”

“I don’t know” he shrugged “I’ve been in 6 years, I originally told myself I would only do one contract, but I haven’t decided yet. If I sign on for another 6, I’ll most likely get stationed somewhere else. If I choose not to, I’m free to go wherever. Or stay wherever.”

Remus turned to him but didn’t say anything. They stared at each other for a moment before Eric broke the pause.

“I’m not a bad guy, Remus. I really do care about Penelope. I care about Mia too— as a friend of course, I’m not still into her like that.”

Remus ran his tongue along his teeth as he thought. After a moment, he sighed and nodded, “I never thanked you, for helping her with her fever when I couldn’t. Thank you for that”

“Of course” Eric said softly, meeting his eyes. “I know you would’ve done the same thing for Penny”

Remus stuck his right hand out to shake. “I suppose I’ve been less than polite with you…” he said as Eric shook his hand. Eric grinned and picked up his and Penelope’s drink glasses, following Remus back to their table. Mia eyed Remus as he set her glass in front of her.

“What was that about?” she asked in a whisper, her brow raised “you two kiss and make up?”

“Something like that” he smirked and kissed her forehead. “Now, has anyone seen Bill?—” he clasped his hands together as he scanned the reception site “–I need to give him my congratulations personally.”

* * *

The dance floor was full as Mia watched everyone having an excellent time. She watched as Kingsley, who couldn’t dance to save his life, hold Reggie on the outskirts of the dance floor and bounce in time with the music as Tonks danced around wildly, her hair changing color every time a new song started. Fleur and Bill beamed with happiness; despite how grossly in love they usually were, their public displays of affection were sweet and heartwarming today. 

Most of the witches and wizards were dressed quite normal; their dress robes plain colors of black, navy and maroon. Luna Lovegood and an older gentleman that Mia presumed was her father were dressed in robes of bright gold, sticking out like sore thumbs as they danced oddly off to the side of the crowd. She frowned as she watched the blonde witch twirl about— even ‘Looney Lovegood’ was having a better time tonight than she was. She wished she could dance, to have Remus hold her close while they waltzed to ballads. She looked good at least; her waist-length dark hair was curled and pinned to one side with a hairclip encrusted with sapphires. Whilst everyone was jumping around and sweating their makeup off, she remained a perfect porcelain doll watching from the sidelines. She watched as Remus spun Gabrielle, Fleur’s kid sister, around and around as they skipped in time. He reminded her of a father dancing with his daughter; their laughing faces bring a smile to Mia’s. She looked down to the ring sparkling on her left hand, fidgeting with the diamond as she lost herself in thought. Remus would make a fantastic father; she knew his reservations, but she couldn’t help but think now that they were indeed getting married, another conversation of having children would need to happen.

“How are you doing over here, Mia?” 

Penelope and Eric had made their way back to the table, her skin glistening with sweat and hair falling out of its pins.

“I’m alright; you guys look like you’re having fun”

“Yeah, you wizards know how to party!” Eric looked over at Bill as he plopped down in the chair next to Mia. “He looks a lot different than I saw him last. He was attacked by the same werewolf as you?”

Mia nodded, her stomach flip-flopping as she remembered Fenrir slicing and dicing Bill’s face, and the feeling of his blood soaking her as the savage werewolf climbed over her— bearing that horrible, carnivorous grin that haunted her nightmares. 

“Someone really needs to kill that guy…” Eric muttered

“Yeah, no kidding” Mia snorted “ _our side doesn’t kill_ ” she added in a mocking voice, shaking her head as she took a hearty swig of wine.

A vibration on her right wrist made her jump in her seat, her eyes shooting up to Remus. Still on the dance floor across the reception space, he was staring back at her— holding his wrist up as his eyes silently questioned if she were feeling the same sensation. Everyone’s attention turned to a silver streak blazing though the sky, headed right for the reception space. In a puff of silver mist, a patronus appeared— a badger— opening its mouth and speaking in Susan’s voice.

“The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming.”

Chaos erupted as witches and wizards began to panic and disapparate on the spot. Mia turned to Penelope and Eric, he looking confused and she looking pale like she had seen a ghost.

“Get him out of here!” she hissed to Penelope “ _Now!_ ”

Before Eric could even ask what was happening, Penelope grabbed him and disapparated in a loud crack. Mia grabbed her cane and began limping towards Remus, her wand drawn. Flashes of light began to erupt all around them as many of the wedding guests were screaming for their loved ones. She threw up shield after shield, the weight on her leg nearly too much to bear.

“REMUS!” she screamed over the commotion.

“MIA!” he hollered, shielding Ron and Hermione from curses flying at them.

“Mia! Take Ginny! Get out of here!” Arthur yelled, shoving Ginny towards her.

“REMUS!” she screamed again.

“MIA! GO! NOW!” Arthur yelled again

“I can’t leave him!— REMUS!”

“Mia, you have to— GO!”

The scene was so noisy and chaotic, it was disorienting. She lost sight of Remus as the crowd of guest all swarmed in panic, more and more disapparating when they found their loved ones. She swore as she looked between Arthur and the swarm of people. Shield charms were flying up everywhere as more flashes of spells shot all around them.

“GO!” Arthur yelled again

With an angry growl, Mia grabbed Ginny’s hand, , the noise of chaos disappearing into the vacuum as they compressed in on one another.

“ _Fuck!_ ”

Mia’s injured leg collapsing underneath her, a splitting pain shooting downward as her and Ginny’s feet hit the floor of her living room. Ginny grabbed her arm, trying to help her stand.

“Shit, Mia, I’m sorry….” 

“It’s ok, it’s ok” she said breathlessly “are you hurt?”

“No—“

“You guys ok?!” Penelope asked

She and Eric were standing in front of them, both looking confused and worried.

“Yeah, we’re fine” Ginny said “she’s going to want something for her leg— pain potion, probably.”

“I’ll get it”

Penelope rummaged through their kitchen cabinets, plucking a vial out and handing it to Mia.

“What the hell was all that?” Eric asked

“The Ministry fell, You-know-who has taken over” Ginny said weakly

“Who?”

“Vol-“ Mia began

“DON’T SAY HIS NAME!” Ginny flinched

“Sorry” Mia grumbled “the dark wizard we told you about. They don’t like to say his name”

“Why? It’s just a name” 

They were interrupted by the phone ringing, Penelope picking it up and answering with a robotic ‘hello’.

“Oh Susan, thank goodness— yeah she’s here, hold on—” 

Penelope held the phone to Mia, mouthing ‘it’s your mum’. She limped over, supporting herself clumsily with her cane.

“Mum?”

“Oh sweetie, thank merlin you are safe! I was so worried when I head they were going after Bill’s wedding to look for Harry!”

“Mum! What happened, what’s going on?”

Penelope, Eric and Ginny all leaned in as if to also hear the telephone conversation.

“The Death Eaters tortured and killed Scrimgeour; they have control of the Ministry. It’s bad, Mia, really bad— I’m not sure who to trust at this point.” 

“Where are you?”

“I’m with the Prime Minister still, I can’t leave him.”

“Everyone is still at the Burrow. I disapparated with Ginny, but they’re all still there. Tonks, Kingsley, Reggie, Remus…”

Her voice trailed off, her focus now on the vibration still present on her right wrist. Fear coursed through her at the unknown of what was happening.

“Amelia, listen to me. Under no circumstances are you to leave that flat, you hear me? Ginny is your responsibility now; you keep her safe. Stay there until Remus gets back, I’ll call as soon as I know anything.”

“Mum—“

“I have to go, _stay put_. Understand?”

“Yes” she groaned through her teeth “I love you”

“I love you too, sweetheart. Talk to you soon”

Mia slammed the phone on the hook, and let out a grunt of frustration.

“We’re grounded.” She grumbled. “Mum says it’s really bad”

She hobbled over to the couch, sitting down heavily and groaning as she tried to stretch her injured leg.

“Is it illegal to get married?” Eric asked thickly “Why was the wedding attacked?”

Penelope put a hand on Eric’s shoulder, squeezing softly.

“They were looking for Harry Potter, the one I told you about”

“Yeah but he wasn’t there, right? You would’ve pointed him out if so?”

“He was there, Penelope just didn’t know” Mia said, “Polyjuice; He told Remus and I who he was”

“I had no idea—” Penelope began, but stopped as Eric looked at her, puzzled “I’ll explain polyjuice later…” she said out of the corner of her mouth to him.

Ginny plopped on the couch next to Mia and let out a huff “So… I’m bunking with you guys for a bit?” she gruffed.

“Looks like it. Good thing I got groceries yesterday” Mia said “Don’t use magic while you’re here— that goes for all of us”

“Can the ‘Death Eater’ people find you when you use magic?” Eric asked

“They can find Ginny, because she has the trace”

Eric furrowed his brow, looking between Ginny, Mia and Penelope.

“Trace?”

“Underage witches and wizards aren’t supposed to do magic outside of school. They can sense magic around an underage person, like Ginny. We don’t know if were to cast a spell if it were to trigger Ginny’s trace” Penelope explained.

“Well, let’s live like muggles then.” Ginny muttered, jumping up from the couch and smoothing her gold bridesmaid dress. “Mia, Can I borrow some clothes?”

“Make yourself at home; you’re going to be here a bit”

* * *

It seemed like hours before any news arrived at the flat. Mia had insisted everyone try to sleep for the night, but no one, including her, wanted to sleep without some news that everyone they left at the wedding was safe. The 4 of them sat around the dining room table and played cards, trying to make the time go by faster. Mia’s wrist had been vibrating the entire time, praying for the moment it stopped vibrating to hear the pop of apparition behind her and to feel Remus sweep her into a tight embrace.

A silver streak shot through their wall, a silver weasel materializing on the table before them.

“Family safe. Do not contact, house being watched. Keep Ginny.”

The voice spoke in Arthur’s voice, Eric staring at it with wonder and amazement. Mia looked down at her vibrating wrist and let out a frustrated grunt.

“Then why is this piece of shit still vibrating??” she growled.

The phone rang; cutting the silence that had fallen after Arthur’s weasel spoke its message. Penelope jumped up and answered, outstretching the phone to Mia.

“It’s Susan”

“Well tell her to hang on, I can’t walk very fast!” 

Mia limped over to the phone, leaning against the kitchen cabinets for support.

“Mum?”

“How is everyone there? Any trouble?”

“We’re fine, just bored and worried. Arthur sent us a patronus and told us the Burrow is safe, but they’re being watched.”

“Yes I got word of that too. Kingsley and Tonks are home safe with Reggie, they were going to send you a patronus but I told them I would call you. The less magic around Ginny the better”

“A patronus wouldn’t trigger the trace, would it?” 

“No, it shouldn’t coming to you but I wouldn’t cast one yourself.” Susan said, “listen sweetie, I’ve got to get back to the Prime Minister; I’m guarding him overnight until Kingsley relieves me in the morning”

“Mum wait—“ Mia said quickly “have you heard from Remus?”

“No, I haven’t; he’s not with you yet?”

Susan sounded surprised, which didn’t comfort Mia at all.

“No” she grumbled “call me if you hear from him?”

“Will do— remember to stay put. Don’t go out looking for him, ok?”

Mia reluctantly agreed and hung up the phone, huffing loudly. She rubbed her vibrating wrist, chewing her bottom lip and fighting back frustrated tears. At least she knew as long as her wrist made the gentle hum, he was alive.

* * *

They were cooped up in the flat for nearly three days; all four of them beginning to lost their mind of boredom. Mia was surprised Eric had insisted on staying through the weekend, being very attentive to helping the girls with meals and entertainment.

“As long as I am on base for roll call at 08:00 Monday morning, I want to ride this out with you guys”

They could only play cards so many times, so they cycled through VHS tapes, Eric choosing which movies he insisted Ginny get acquainted with.

“It’s sacrilege that you’ve never even _heard_ of him!” he said to her dumfounded when she stared blankly at the tape of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off in his hand. “What the hell do you witches watch on television??”

Ginny had been a tremendous help also while she way staying with them, especially helping Mia change her dressings and insisting she help cook so Mia didn’t have to hobble around the kitchen. Her leg was gaining a little bit of strength back, the wound closing from the rigorous routine of potions Molly was having her take, but she still had a bit of a limp in her step. Penelope and Ginny forced her to eat her regular meals, despite her nerves making food the absolute last thing she wanted that weekend.

Her wrist stopped vibrating early Sunday morning, making her expect Remus to come popping into the room any moment. Much to her dissatisfaction, even hours after the bracelet had ceased, there was no sign of him.

“He’s either dead, or fucking with me!” She hollered, pacing back and forth, limping with her cane.

“He’s not dead, and he’s not messing with you” Ginny said “You should sit down”

“Then where is my patronus telling me he’s ok? Better yet, where the fuck is he?”

“I don’t know, but you need to sit down and rest your leg!” Ginny hissed

“If he’s not dead, I’m going to kill him!”

It wasn’t until nearly sundown on Sunday night that the front door bustled open, Remus shuffling inside with a few newspapers in his hand.

“Remus! Thank goodness!” Penelope cried, pointing her wand at him “What lesson did you use Mia and I for a demonstration when you taught at Hogwarts?”

“I had you two demonstrate non-verbally deflecting jinxes” he replied without falter.

Penelope lowered her wand, then threw her arms around him and squeezed him tight.

“Sorry it took me so long to get back here, I had a Death Eater tailing me. When I shook him of, I went to deliver some news to Harry, Ron and Hermione. Things aren’t looking too—” Remus said, cut off by Mia’s shouting from the other room.

“REMUS JOHN LUPIN YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!” 

She limped out of her bedroom, eyes burning with fury and gritting her teeth. Her bandage was falling off her leg, Ginny running behind her with a piece of tape. (“Let me tape that up first!!”)

“Hey, your limp looks bet— OW!”

She smacked his shoulder with her cane, all while shouting crude expletives at him. He threw his arm up to shield himself from being whacked with her cane again.

“We haven’t heard from you in _days!_ ” she hissed “You could’ve sent me an update once you were safe!”

“Sorry, I stopped by headquarters to see Harry and the others, then the Burrow to check on Arthur and Molly. I brought some papers with updates on what’s been going on” he said, motioning to the Daily Prophet copies on the table. “I missed you…”

He tried to kiss her, but she held her cane up, threatening to strike again.

“No, you had me worried sick! Go away— your face is pissing me off!” she grumbled, plopping down in chair and hastily grabbing a Daily Prophet, burying her nose in it.

“She’s been ready to kill you all day, man…” Eric whispered to Remus, sticking his right hand out to shake it “Glad you’re alright”

“Thanks, Eric. She been eating?”

“Yeah, but Penny had to fight with her a few times on it. What’s up with that, anyway?”

“It’s just a thing she does” 

He eyed Mia as she turned her nose up while she read. He couldn’t help but think how cute she looked when she was angry.

“I can hear you, assholes” she snapped. “Now what the hell is this Muggle-born Registration?”

“WHAT?” Ginny and Penelope cried at the same time. 

Penelope ripped the Daily Prophet out of Mia’s hand and stared at it for a minute. Her mouth hung open as she read:

_All ‘Muggle-born’ Witches and Wizards must register with the Ministry’s newly appointed Muggle-born Registration commission. Recent research undertaken by the Department of Mysteries reveals that magic can only be passed from person to person when Wizards reproduce. Where no proven Wizarding ancestry exists, therefore, the so-called Muggle-born is likely to have obtained magical power by theft or force. The Ministry is determined to root out such usurpers of magical power, and to this end has issued an invitation to every so-called Muggle-born to present themselves for interview by the Muggle-born Registration Commission._

“ohmygod” Penelope gasped, her hands starting to shake “I honestly have no magical ancestry that I know of”

“They are rounding up Muggle-borns as we speak; they are scheduling trials, and sending them to Azkaban if they cannot prove magical ancestry” Remus said heavily.

“I can’t go to Azkaban!” she squeaked “The cells are filthy, and smell like toilets! People scream for their mothers and wives to save them, going insane and offing themselves in their cells!”

She began breathing rapidly, her eyes darting around wildly. Eric grabbed her hand, shaking her gently.

“Penny, hey, relax— I think she’s having a panic attack”

“Ginny, there’s calming draught in the drawer by the sink!” Mia said, pointing towards the kitchen.

Ginny threw the drawer open and found the small dropper bottle, shuffling over to Penelope and forcing her mouth open, dropping a couple drops on her tongue. Once Penelope relaxed, Ginny began rubbing her shoulders.

“There, it’s ok…” Ginny said soothingly

“We’re not going to let that happen” Remus said gently “we’ll figure this out”

Penelope nodded, sniffing loudly.

“What am I supposed to do about work?” Mia asked “I can’t work at the Ministry alongside Death Eaters”

Remus thought for a moment before speaking “As much as I don’t like the idea of you going back, I think you should. You need to keep up the appearance that you have nothing to hide. It would be good to have some insider information as to what is going on inside those walls.”

Mia nodded stiffly, biting her lip.

“Penny, Take a sleeping draught and get a good night’s rest; we’ll talk about it in the morning.” Remus said “Ginny, I’m supposed to take you back to the Burrow tonight, you ready to go?”

She nodded and walked over to him, taking his arm. 

“Don’t take three days to get back” Mia said flatly as they disapparated.

“Mia, I’m scared” Penelope squeaked

Mia let out a large sigh, taking Penelope’s hand. “Me too”

* * *

Mia limped around her room getting ready for bed with a heavy heart. She had sent Penelope off to bed with a sleeping draught, hoping she would be able to get a good night’s sleep despite the impending Muggle-born registration. Eric waited until she was asleep to head back to base, albeit insisting he could stay until sunrise. Mia shooed him away, insisting she would understand and not to miss roll call, remembering her father’s tangents when his men would be late to report.

She was nervous to go back to work; tomorrow was Monday and she hadn’t been to work since before they moved Harry the weekend previous. Not only would she have a difficult time getting around the Ministry with her inconvenient limp, but now that the Ministry was infiltrated? What did this mean going forward?

She hobbled around the room in her pajamas, also feeling irritated that Remus had now been gone over an hour to take Ginny home. She was so relieved when he came home safe, but so mad that he kept her worried sick. Her heart leapt when she heard the pop of apparition from the other room, and her bedroom door open. Remus stepped inside, and her anger came back tenfold. 

“Hey, sorry I got caught up talking to Arth— _give me that!_ ” he yanked her cane out of her hand that she had rose to whack him again.

“I was worried sick, and you felt the need to keep me in the dark for _days!_ ” she hissed angrily “you could’ve sent me updates!” 

“I had a Death Eater following me— I didn’t want him to know I was sending messages, in case he decided to follow it” He said “I didn’t mean to worry you”

He took a few steps towards her and cupped her face with his hand, giving her a small smirk.

“Don’t do that!” she growled, wagging her finger at him.

“Do what?”

“Look at me like that!”

“I don’t know what you mean” he said grinning, running his one hand into her hair and snaking his other arm around her waist. “You know, you’re really cute when you’re angry”

“I am not cu—“she spat, cut off by his lips crashing against hers.

She broke the kiss suddenly and pushed him, feeling a slight tingle in her palms as her hands were pressing against his chest

“You can’t just walk in here all handsome and seductive, kiss me, and expect me to just forget I’m angry!”

He smirked at her, his eyes flashing “I disagree.”

His lips crashed back against hers again; She felt a surge of energy as his tongue swirled around hers, kissing her passionately. She moaned in submission against his mouth, giving into him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning her weight against him to support her weakened leg. He picked her up carried her over to the bed, laying her down gently and pulling her pajama shorts and panties off. There was something about the way he handled her now after biting her that was different— almost as if he let go of any fear he had of hurting her accidentally. The way he nipped at her flesh and touched her seemed to hold no reservations, allowing himself to fully be enraptured by her. He trailed kisses down her body until he settled himself between her thighs.

“Just because you touch me in the right places doesn’t mean I’m not still— _fuck!_ ”

Her back arched from his touch, sliding a finger inside her as his tongue worked her clit with feather soft strokes.

“You…are…an…asshole… _shit!_ ”

She writhed as she gripped the bedsheets, the sensation too good as she came for him with a sharp gasp. He chuckled as he kissed the inside of her thigh and trailed upward, his smug grin irritating and arousing Mia all at the same time.

“I want you so bad…” he whispered in her ear, undoing his belt. “All I’ve been able to think about for days is the way you smell, the way you taste, the way you feel…”

“And what about what _I’ve_ been thinking about for days?” She breathed, grabbing his face and stopping him “I didn’t think I would ever see you again— how could you do that to me?”

He looked at her, his expression softening as he tucked a strand of her black hair behind her ear “I’m so sorry, I truly didn’t mean to worry you— I promise as long as I am on this earth; I won’t do that to you again”

“You better not.”

She kissed him roughly, tangling her hands into his hair. She wrapped her legs around him as he slid into her, ignoring the slight twinge in her injured thigh as he pounded in and out of her. He growled lewd things in her ear as she begged him for more, her arousal burning in her mark and deep in her core. He grabbed her leg to move it over his shoulder, accidentally gripping the very spot that was injured. She let out a yelp of pain as he quickly realized his error.

“ _Shit_ — I’m sorry, you ok?” he asked, his movements becoming slightly erratic.

“No no no I’m fine don’t stop don’t stop!!” 

She gripped his hair tighter; a few more strokes and her back arched sharply, his name rolling off her lips as she melted underneath him. He came a moment later with a low grunt, burying his face in her shoulder.

“I’m sorry I hurt your leg” he panted, peppering her jaw with kisses.

“Its fine” she breathed “Can you get me a pain potion?”

He obliged, shifting off of her to retrieve her potion from the bathroom medicine cabinet. When he returned, he climbed in bed next to her, fluffing the pillows behind her as she downed the vial.

“You’re amazing, you know that?” he murmured in her ear.

She rolled her eyes and gently shoved him, trying her hardest not to let him see her smile.

“Shut up— I’m still mad at you”.


	50. chapter 50

“I think you should let me carry you to the entrance, your leg is going to get tired”

Remus watched as Mia limped around the bedroom, getting dressed for her first day back at the Ministry since the wedding. The Ministry enacted a new policy for employees arriving to work; no longer could you apparate or floo into the Ministry’s atrium, forcing employees to flush themselves down a public restroom toilet to commute for work. 

“You said it yourself, my limp is looking better” she said “where is my purple blouse? The one with the high neck?”

“The hamper, maybe? Why can’t you wear this one?”

He held up a blue blouse that was on top of a pile of clothes she had pulled out of her closet and threw onto the bed in a frenzy to get dressed.

“It shows my mark” she said, waving her hand at him “and concealment charms are a pain in the ass to keep up all day”

“Sorry…” he said sheepishly.

She found the shirt she was looking for in the hamper, sniff checking it before casting a cleaning charm with a wave of her hand. She turned to look at him, recognizing the creeping self-loathing in his eyes.

“No, no don’t do that” she said, kissing him softly “you have nothing to be sorry for”/p>

A crack of apparition from the living room made both of them flinch, Tonks’s voice now hollering through the bedroom door.

“Mia, I’m here! Ready to go?”

“Coming!”

She slipped on her blouse and turned back to look at herself in the mirror. She smoothed the fabric over her mark, ensuring it was indeed covered.

“You look beautiful” Remus said with a small smile. “I want a full report when you get home”

“Yes sir” she winked, leaning in for another kiss.

She expected a quick peck on the lips, but he snaked a hand into her hair as her lips touched his, holding her to him and kissing her deeply. She felt a heat burn between her legs; she wanted nothing more than to throw herself in his lap and sink down on him.

“Oi, you two better not be shagging in there— we need to get moving! Kingsley said the lines at the flushers are going to be long!” Tonks shouted through the door

“I have to go I have to go” she murmured quickly against his lips, forcing herself to pull away.

“There’s more of that for when you get home” he said slyly “go, Tonks is waiting”

He slapped her butt playfully as she grabbed her cane from the dresser. She broke into a fit of giggles as she spun back and kissed him one more time, Tonks hollering through the door again.

“You two are disgusting— let’s go!” 

Mia opened the door laughing, limping out to find Tonks standing in the living room with her arms crossed.

“We weren’t shagging” Mia chuckled

“mhmm” Tonks hummed, raising a brow “you got everything you need?”

She grabbed her purse off the dining table, checking to ensure she had her daily dose of potions with her. She patted the bag then threw it over her shoulder, giving Tonks thumbs up.

“Yep, got my array of potions and fresh bandages just in case”

“You can apparate, right? We don’t have time to walk to the flushers now” Tonks said, giving Remus a sideways glance

“Uh, kinda”

Mia frowned at her leg, remembering the splitting pain she felt when she apparated from the wedding back to the flat. Tonks linked arms with her, giving her a nod.

“We’ll side along— bye Remus!”

“Be careful you two. Mia, see you tonight”

She gave him a small smile “Bye— I love you”

The familiar tug behind her navel was accompanied by the feeling of iron bands squeezing the air and life out of her, her body desperate for a breath. The sensation of apparition was at least short, fresh air filling her lungs as a splitting pain shot down her leg the moment her feet hit solid ground.

“ _fuck!_ ”

She leaned on Tonks heavily, gritting her teeth as the pain subsided slowly. Tonks fought to hold her up, not allowing her injured leg to collapse.

“Sorry— you ok?”

“Yeah” Mia groaned weakly “I can’t wait ‘til this shit is healed”

“How much longer does Molly think?”

“About another week if I am diligent with my potions” Mia said “it’s not as bad as it was, but it’s still pretty painful.”

They hobbled into the public restroom where they would flush themselves into the Ministry, shuffling along the crowd of other Ministry employees. Mia and Tonks entered side by side stalls, Mia struggling to climb into the toilet. She was surprised that even though she was in a few inches of water, her feet were completely dry. Nevertheless, she felt disgusted as she pulled the flush cord, spiraling down through the toilet pipes. It was a similar feeling as the floo network, but something seemed a little degrading about spinning through sewer pipes rather than chimneys. Her feet hit the ground of the Ministry’s fireplaces, she letting out a hiss of pain when the familiar splitting jolt shot down her leg. Tonks ran to her side, helping her steady as she regained her footing.

“You alright?”

“ _Really_ can’t wait ‘til this shit is healed” she grumbled.

They made their way into the atrium, gasping at the sight of the new statue that stood in the middle of the fountain of magical brethren. An enormous black stone carving of a witch and wizard sitting on an ornate throne dominated the room, the words ‘ **MAGIC IS MIGHT** ’ carved at the base of their feet. When Mia looked closer, she realized the throne was composed of bodies pressed together— muggles— to support the weight of the witch and wizard. She was repulsed by the sight of such a horrible sculpture, wishing for nothing more than to send a few good blasting charms right at it. Tonks tugged on her arm gently, giving her a sad expression and a weak nod.

“It’s disgusting” Mia whispered

“I know.” Tonks said softly “This is bad.”

* * *

Mia hobbled into the Wizengamot offices, thankful to have reached her desk to sit down. She plopped into the chair, groaning slightly as she flexed her throbbing leg. She dug through her bag and plucked a pain potion out, downing in one quick gulp.

“Where is my coffee?” 

Delphinus emerged from her office; hands on her hips a she studied Mia with a furrowed brow. Mia pinched the bridge of her nose and cringed— how could she have forgotten? She’d only been working for Delphinus Gamal for 6 months, and every morning she had gone to Calista Calderon’s to retrieve her troll sized latte with a plethora of ingredients. 

“ _Shit_ — I completely forgot this morning, I am so sorry…”

Delphinus sighed heavily, looking to her supporting her weight with her cane. “It’s alright, Mia.” She said with slightly more inflexion than Mia was used to hearing her speak with. “Susan told me you were injured, I didn’t realize it was this bad. I can get my own coffee until your leg heals— she said you had a spell backfire?”

“Oh— yeah” Mia said quickly “I like to experiment, and well, this one failed”

It was a weak lie, but the only possible thing she could tell people when they asked about her leg. Many magical injuries can be healed on the spot, so to see a witch walking around with a cane was not a common sight.

“Be careful next time” Delphinus nodded “I need 19 copies of the stack on your desk”

“Yes ma’am”

Mia turned her attention to the pile of folders in front of her, staring at them in contempt. She sighed heavily; she really hated copying files.

The rest of the day went on as normal; Mia copied her usual copious amounts of files as she kept track of the clock to ensure she took her potions on time. Her constant watching of the time made the day seem to drag on; she had a couple hours left still in her day and she felt like she had been here for three hundred years already.

Mia’s attention to her stack of papers was broken when Dolores Umbridge walked in with a large Cheshire cat grin plastered to her toad-like face. A middle-aged man with dull flaxen hair was beside her, his elegant black robes crisp and lint free, accented with a silver Ministry of Magic brooch pinned to the left side of his chest. His eyes were cold, his presence made Mia uncomfortable.

“Dolores, Corban, what do I owe the pleasure?” Delphinus said as she strode out of her office, though her tone suggested that this visit was not a pleasure.

“Good afternoon Delphinus, I hope we are not interrupting” Umbridge said in her high girlish voice “I wanted to come by to ask you if I could use Amelia for my project”

“What project?” she asked

“I need some assistance for the Muggle Born Registration Commission— scribing for the trials specifically” she said, her smile sickeningly pleased with herself. “So, I’ll need you to excuse her from her work here for about a month or so”

“Of course” Delphinus said with a nod

Mia took note that her boss seemed less than pleased to share her aide. By her jaw clenching, she could tell Delphinus wanted to refuse. Part of her wished Delphinus would’ve refused— Mia wanted nothing to do with Umbridge’s disgusting prejudice.

“Excellent, I won’t need her for a couple weeks—” Umbridge’s face twisted when she noticed Mia’s cane “Oh my, what happened to you?”

“Oh— I like to experiment with spells, and one of them backfired. St. Mungo’s has me on a bunch of potions, should be healed up in about a week.”

Mia’s lie was delivered smoothly; Umbridge simply smiled, but the blonde man next to her looked her up and down, seeming to know she was lying. His cold, dark eyes sent a shiver down her spine.

“I wish you a speedy recovery” Umbridge said sweetly, but something about her body language seemed false “Have you met Corban, yet?”

“No, I don’t believe so—“She took a step towards the man, leaning heavily on her cane as she stuck her right hand out to shake his “Mia Roswell, it’s a pleasure”

The man took her hand and shook it, making eye contact for longer than she was comfortable with.

“Corban Yaxley, Head of Magical Law Enforcement”

“Amelia is interning here as an aide, but is an aspiring Auror like her mother. She is exceptionally bright and received all Outstandings on her NEWTs” Delphinus interjected.

“Impressive…” Yaxley said softly. He looked at her leg and cane intently, noticing the ring on Mia’s left finger. “I see you are engaged; best wishes” He said with a small smirk “Who is the lucky gentleman?”

She opened her mouth to answer, but her words caught in her throat. She knew she shouldn’t mention Remus in front of Umbridge, she certainly knew his name was synonymous with werewolf ever since Snape outed him at the end of her 7th year.

“…Eric” she said suddenly, forcing a wide grin.

_Eric, really?_ Her brain scolded her, but it was the first name she could think of. Yaxley and Umbridge both eyed her, as if knowing she was lying again. 

“How wonderful” Umbridge said, her high, girlish voice off-putting “Alright, we won’t keep you, I’ll be in touch”

Mia nodded to Umbridge and forced a smile. She turned to walk out of the office, Yaxley following behind her, but not before he gave Mia another once over. She met his eyes for a moment, then watched him as he turned and exited, his long blonde braid whipping around with him. There was something off about Yaxley, something suspicious.

“You need to be careful around Corban Yaxley.” Delphinus said in her ear, making her jump. “And Dolores Umbridge, for that matter— you think you play her game better than she does, but I assure you, you do not.”

Mia turned and looked at her boss incredulously. “What do you mean?” she asked as her eyes narrowed.

“Just as I said— be careful.”

* * *

The bite on her neck felt warm as she rocked her hips against him, gasping at each of his thrusts. He slid his hands up her back and grabbed her shoulders, pulling her downward so he could push deeper into her. His mouth caught hers to muffle her cries, kissing her passionately as his body tensed then relaxed under hers.

“That was great— we should be shagging in the arm chair every time” Mia panted as her lips broke apart from his, closing her eyes and leaning her head back so he could kiss the soft flesh of her neck.

“I’m just glad this leg held out” Remus murmured

She giggled as he nibbled her earlobe, pulling away as it tickled. She peppered his lips with a few quick kisses as she murmured ‘I love you’ over and over.

“And I love you, but now that we’ve had our fun, I want to hear about your day” he said, patting her butt cheek gently “Get dressed— I’ll make us tea”

“Alright, alright” Mia laughed, getting up and limping off toward her bedroom. “Where the hell is my stupid cane??”

“By the door” Remus said, fixing his belt “I’ll get it”

“I got it— _accio cane!_ ” she said, raising her hand.

Her cane flew through the air to her, she catching it with ease and hobbling off into the bedroom.

“When did you learn summoning spells wandless?” He called to her, furrowing his brow as he buttoned up his shirt.

“I practice when Delphinus leaves for lunch” she hollered from inside the bedroom. “My job is boring; I have to pass the time somehow”

Remus smiled as he put a tea kettle on the stove, he was impressed with how quickly she was picking up wandless spells— it seemed like she was learning to do more and more without her wand by the week.

“So I am going to be working with the Muggle Born registration, assisting on trials, etc…” she called from inside the other room. “Umbridge asked for me specifically”

Remus pondered this for a moment as he poured boiling water into their tea mugs “What exactly did she say?”

“Well, she came by to ‘ask’ if she could borrow me for a few weeks, but it wasn’t a request” Mia said, limping out of the bedroom in one of Remus’s flannel shirts.

“Could you wear your own clothes for once?” He teased “That’s my good flannel— it only has one hole”

Mia grinned and waved her hand over the tear in the shoulder of the shirt, it repairing itself seamlessly. “I learned another new trick” she winked.

She plopped into a dining chair as Remus brought her tea to her. “I’ve got plenty more hole-y clothing for you to practice your sewing spells” he chuckled, sitting across from her “Back to it, so she asked for you personally…”

“Yeah, and she brought the new Head of Magical Law Enforcement with her— brutal face bloke, made me uncomfortable with his staring.”

“Who took over?”

“Corban Yaxley?” she said, scrunching her nose and taking a sip of her tea “I haven’t heard that name before, but his face was a little familiar”

“Corban Yaxley is a Death Eater” Remus said frankly “You are not going back there”

“I have to! How suspicious is it if I don’t go back?”

Remus sighed heavily, rubbing his face in frustration “you’re right— I just worry about you”

“I know, but I have to go back. Especially now that I have to work on that disgusting Muggle-born shit”

“At least maybe you could use your insider knowledge to help Penelope, see what you can finagle to help her.”

“That’s what I was thinking” Mia said softly.

She took another sip of her tea, a little too large of a swig as it burnt her tongue and the roof of her mouth.

“Anything else you can tell me?” Remus asked

“No, that’s all I have. I really didn’t learn much today at all.” She said heavily. “I’ll see what I can find out the rest of the week— should I call out Yaxley for being a Death Eater?”

“ _Absolutely not!_ — you keep your head down, you hear me? Don’t do anything stupid”

“Alright alright, I’ll keep my head down” She grumbled

“No cheek, no sass— alright?”

“No cheek, no sass” she repeated with an eye roll.

He studied her for a moment, giving her a stern fatherly gaze. She met his gaze, setting her tea down and folding her arms on the table in front of her.

“What??”

“If there was any time to heed my advice, _now_ is the time” he said “We are at a disadvantage in the current state of power— there’s no telling how much we are all at risk”

* * *

Copying files was the bane of her existence, Mia was certain of this. It seemed like since Delphinus got word three days ago that Mia would be out for the Muggle Born trials that folders and papers seemed to pile twice as high, her boss requiring more and more work out of her. She duplicated files over and over for next week’s court proceedings, her eyes feeling like they were crossing from the mundane task. Her brain had gone on autopilot, trying to zone out so that the two hours remaining of the day would fly by.

“Mia!!” 

Tonks’s voice came from down the hall. Mia perked her head up from her desk, craning her neck back to look for her friend.

“Mia! Mia!” Tonks was out of breath as she reached the door to the administrative offices. “It’s your mum— someone sent her a clipping of devil’s snare!”

“What??” She cried, her face twisting up “Who??”

“You— according to the parcel” Tonks breathed, her cheeks flushed from her jog. “She’s alright, but it nearly strangled her”

“Shit— Hey, Delphinus? I need to—”

“I heard Nymphadora— go ahead, go” Delphinus called from her office.

“Oh come on Delphinus, I’ve told you, call—“

“Tonks!” Mia said forcefully “Help me, I can’t walk very fast”

They made their way to Auror Headquarters, Mia hobbling along as she gripped her cane with one hand and Tonks’s arm with the other. Susan was sitting at her desk with Williamson, Robards and Dawlish standing around her as she rubbed her neck. She had a straight line of bruising around her entire neck, the black and blue color just starting to develop. The dead clipping of devil’s snare lay motionless and shriveled at her feet.

“Mum!” Mia said, limping over to hug her “Are you alright?”

They embraced tightly, Mia leaning her weight on her mother to ease the strain on her leg.

“Yes sweetie, I’m alright” Susan said weakly “Thankfully Robards was standing here when I opened the parcel—“

“Mum, it wasn’t me that sent it to you…”

“Obviously” Susan said sarcastically “There was a note underneath the clipping”

Susan handed Mia the bit of parchment to read. Scrawled in blue ink was one sentence that made her heart skip a beat.

_You can try to hide, but you can’t stay hidden forever._

“Mum, I think this was Dolohov” Mia said softly 

“I agree— I don’t think he wanted to kill me today, if he had, he would’ve made sure this package found me when I was alone.” Susan nodded 

“How did it get in here?” Tonks asked, looking around the room and over her shoulder.

“I bet Yaxley planted it” Mia muttered

“ _Be careful!_ ” Susan hissed “don’t say that out loud around here— we have to be careful with how we proceed from here. Do not give Yaxley a reason to come after you”

“Mum, is it even safe for us to come to work?” she whispered, lowering her voice so that Robards, Williamson and Dawlish wouldn’t hear her over their conversation they were having just a few steps away.

“No, but it’s safer than not coming to work.”

* * *

“What do you mean someone sent her devil’s snare?!” 

Remus was scrubbing dishes when Mia had arrived home, shattering a cup in the sink and cutting his hand when he heard about the mystery parcel. He swore and grabbed a paper towel, trying to wrap his bleeding hand. Mia limped over and healed his palm with a wave of her hand, then fixed the cup with a flick of her wrist.

“Thanks” he grumbled, kissing her forehead “Who sent it?”

“Dolohov I’m pretty sure— I think Yaxley planted it. They addressed it from me, so she thought it was safe to open.”

“How is she?”

“She’s fine; Robards was at her desk when she opened it, thankfully”

Remus took a deep breath, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear as his face reeled through a few different expressions.

“The Ministry is not safe; I don’t think you should go back”

“I have to— it’s safer to go to work than to not at this point”

Mia wasn’t sure if this was true, but Susan seemed to think it was, and she trusted her mother’s judgement. Remus wrapped one arm around her waist and brushed her cheek with the backs of his fingers.

“It makes me crazy to think about something happening to you.” He said in a husky whisper.

Mia looked into his eyes— this war was getting worse, and they no longer had the upper hand. She was worried they wouldn’t be here tomorrow, let alone this spring for the wedding.

“Marry me” she whispered.

Remus chuckled softly “I am, silly” he teased, kissing the ring on her left finger.

“No, I mean now— well, not _right_ now, but soon. Let’s move the wedding up.”

“Alright, when do you want to do it?”

“In a couple weeks? Before is start the muggle born trials? We can do it the weekend after the full moon.”

“ _Two weeks???_ ” he asked incredulously

"Yeah, we can keep it small, casual.”

Remus chuckled “You want to tell Susan Roswell that the wedding she’s been planning since the day you were born is off, and that you want something quick instead?”

“No, I _don’t_ want to tell her that…” Mia said slowly, laughing nervously and running a hand through her hair “However, I don’t know if we will be here this spring— honestly— and if I am going to die, I want to die as your wife.”

Remus kissed her firmly, then pulled her into a tight embrace. “I would die before I let you die— I won’t let anything happen to you” he whispered as he nuzzled the top of her head with his cheek “If you want to move the wedding up, let’s do it. Think you can swing some time off work?”

Mia scrunched her nose as she shrugged slightly “I hope— I don’t think Delphinus will be very happy”

* * *

“You want a week off work right before I lose you to the Muggle-born trials?”

Mia’s palms were sweating as Delphinus’s dark brown eyes bore into her, her blank, apathetic face impossible to read. She could tell by her boss’s tone of voice, which she was less than pleased with this request.

“I know the timing is bad, but we felt that getting married before the trials started was…”

Delphinus held up her hand to silence Mia, sighing.

“I can’t give you a week this short of notice; especially since I am losing you to this project” Delphinus said “But I can give you three days”

“I’ll take what I can get” Mia said with a sigh of relief “thank you”

Delphinus nodded, and Mia turned to leave the office,

“Mia—“

Mia stopped and turned back to her.

“You know you and your mother are being watched, right?”

“What?”

“Just as I said, you are being watched.” Delphinus said, turning her attention to her papers on her desk. “I told you that you thought you were playing Dolores’ game better than her, but you are not. She asked for you to work the Muggle Born trials because she wants to keep a closer eye on you. She knows your fiancé is a werewolf, she knows you work with the Order of the Phoenix.”

“How do you know all this?” Mia asked, her heart pounding in her ears.

“I was tasked with spying on you, I am supposed to report what you do or say to her”

“Do you?”

“I don’t tell her anything that helps her”

“Why not?”

“Because I _actually_ play Dolores’ game better than she does” Delphinus said “You need to watch what you say and do, especially around those that report back to Corban or her. You have very few in the Ministry that you can trust”

“How do I know I can trust you?” Mia asked

“You don’t” Delphinus said simply, “However; you can— there is a reason Kingsley Shacklebolt recommended you for my department.” She opened her desk drawer and pulled out 2 file folders. “Come here, I will only show you these once.”

Delphinus flicked her wand and the door shut and locked. Mia stepped behind her and looked at 2 files she pulled out of her drawer. She opened the first file, a photograph of Susan smirking back up at her paper clipped to the top left hand corner of the document.

_Susan Roswell_

_Age: 44_

_Occupation: Auror_

_Location: Home concealed under Fidelius charm— Secret Keeper unknown_

_Blood Status: Pure-blood, with unacceptable pro-muggle leanings. Known member of the Order of the Phoenix._

_Family: Parents deceased. Divorced; ex-husband a muggle, deceased. One daughter, also Ministry employee._

_Security Status: TRACKED. Currently shares responsibility of working as the muggle Prime Minister’s secretary with Kingsley Shacklebolt._

Mia’s hand shook slightly as she flipped to the next file. She stared at a headshot photo of her, taken by the NEWT testing examiners for identification shortly before her practical exams. 18 year old Mia smiled back at her, her long dark hair was tucked behind one ear, showcasing a small garnet stud glimmering on her earlobe. She instinctively brought her hand up to feel the earring in her ear, the studs having almost never been taken off since the day Remus had sent them to her.

_Amelia Roswell_

_Age: 21_

_Occupation: Administrative Aide, part time retail associate_

_Location: Home concealed under Fidelius Charm— Secret Keeper unknown._

_Blood Status: Half-blood with unacceptable pro-muggle leanings, known member of the Order of the Phoenix_

_Family: Father (muggle), deceased. Mother (pure-blood), also Ministry employee._

_Security Status: TRACKED. Romantic involvement with known werewolf Remus Lupin. Lives with known Muggle-born Penelope Clearwater. Works at Clearwater’s wine and cheese, part time on weekends. May try to help Clearwater evade trial._

Mia felt her stomach flip flop as her heart began to pound in her ears.

“Why are you showing me this?” she asked quietly

“Because you need to know what you are dealing with”


	51. chapter 51

Copying file after file, Mia’s boredom was reaching an all-time high— if that was even possible. The office was quiet, Delphinus always ate out for lunch on Fridays, and since Mia’s leg was still on the mend, she had packed her lunch for the day to avoid a strenuous walk along the streets of London. She had ate and copied at the same time, hoping maybe to be sent home early if all her work was done for the week. Most likely not, she figured, because with Umbridge stealing her in a couple weeks to work the Muggle Born Registration Commission trials, she was sure Delphinus would want her to get a head start on next week’s files.

She wished she would be allowed a wireless while she worked— that would make her days go by so much faster. She was copying and humming a Weird Sisters tune to try to entertain herself when she felt a hand gently grasp the nape of her neck, and a wand tip touch just underneath her chin.

“ _Don’t make a sound_ ” the voice hissed in her ear

The voice belonged to Corban Yaxley, his grip tightening on her neck when he felt her body stiffen in surprise. A shiver went down her spine as he whispered harshly to her.

“I have a message from Dolohov” he said “He wanted you to see just how easy it would be to get to your mother. You Order of the Phoenix may think you all are safe, but we are stronger now, more powerful. The Dark Lord will prevail, and you all are getting what’s coming to you.”

“You can tell Dolohov to shove his threats right up his hairy—“

Yaxley laughed menacingly, cutting her off “I was told you had some nerve— that you needed to learn when to keep your mouth shut” 

He moved his wand tip away from her chin, and poked her in the leg right where her injury was healing. She hissed in pain, his hand tightening again against the nape of her neck reminding her to be quiet.

“Funny…I hit a decoy Potter with a severing charm in the leg the night he was moved, the Potter who was riding with your mother— _this_ must be my handiwork…” He twisted his wand deeper into the wound; Mia bit her lip to keep from screaming out, the searing pain excruciating. “ _Spell backfiring_ — what a weak story; just like the little lie about that fiancé of yours,” he sneered, leaning closer in to whisper in her ear “or did you indeed dump the werewolf for a real man?” 

“Eat shit!” she growled angrily

“Such a shame, your beauty is wasted with a creature like that…” She flinched as Yaxley’s wand tip trailed upward, running over her hip and stopping at her waist “It’s just a matter of time before everyone knows you spread your legs for a half-breed”

“I’m not ashamed of him or his condition, you can tell the whole world— I don’t care”

“I won’t need to tell anyone, especially if you do such a poor job hiding this—“

He moved her collar over to expose her mark, Mia cringing that she had chosen the blouse she was wearing. She had questioned if it would expose the scar if she wasn’t diligent about making sure the shirt stayed in place.

“I’ll tell everyone you serve him, I’ll expose you” Mia threatened through gritted teeth

“No, you won’t” Yaxley said simply “you are going to pretend this little conversation didn’t happen. You are going to be sweet to me, a good little aide who minds her tongue and keeps her head down. You are going to work with Dolores on the Muggle-born Registration Commission without protest or sabotage— I will be assisting to ensure you behave.”

“And if I don’t?” she spat

“I’ll cart that precious beast of yours off to Azkaban, for performing a werewolf mating ritual on a human. The dementors can wither him away to skin and bone, until he begs for death. Then, I’ll turn both you and your mother over to Dolohov, and let him do what he does best.”

Mia let out a whimper of fear, that she cursed herself for showing weakness. The very thought of Remus rotting in prison or her mother subject to Dolohov’s sadistic torture made her sick.

“Now, are you going to behave?”

Mia took a deep breath, trying to steady her anger. She felt defeated, powerless in this moment. Corban Yaxley held all control in the palm of his hand.

“Yes” she whispered

“Yes _Mr. Yaxley_ ”

Mia gritted her teeth “Yes, Mr. Yaxley”

“Good girl— better get back to work, looks like your falling behind”

He released her and glided out of the room, leaving her standing over her files shaking.

* * *

“This timeline is messing up my entire plan!” Susan said with a huff, throwing her hands up in the air “How am I supposed to find a venue and a caterer on this short of notice?!”

Breaking the news to Susan about moving their wedding date up proved to me more of a headache than Mia realized. She was certain her mother had waited to plan this day since the moment she was born, and giving her a 2 week timeline was interfering severely.

“We could do it at my cottage, by the lake. Mia always loves spending time there” Remus offered

“I suppose that will do— we can bring in lights and chairs, I mean how many people are we going to be able to get here on such short notice?”

“Let’s just keep it small, Order members and close friends. See if Arthur will officiate, and we can see if Molly can help with the food. If it’s only around 40 people it shouldn’t be too difficult, right?” Remus said, turning to Mia. “Mia, what do you think?”

Mia was not paying attention. Her focus was elsewhere, her mind replaying her conversation with Yaxley over and over in her head, her mind’s eye developing vivid images of Remus in a dingy, dark cell, incarcerated because of something she begged him to do. It would be her fault if he went to Azkaban. She was the one who would sentence him to such a horrid fate.

“Earth to Mia— you with us?”

“Huh?” her mind was snapped back to reality as Remus shook her shoulder gently. She looked between him and Susan, her mother looking less than pleased that she wasn’t paying attention. 

“Sweetheart, you were the one who wanted to move this wedding up and you’re not even paying attention?” Susan said, pursing her lips.

“I’m sorry” she said, shaking her head “I’m listening, continue”

“What’s wrong? Your head has been in the clouds since you got home” Remus asked, eyeing her suspiciously.

“I’m fine, it’s nothing”

Remus raised an eyebrow, looking at her intently. Mia felt uncomfortable under his intrusive stare— she threw her face into her hands and groaned.

“Alright alright— Yaxley came to see me at work today”

“What for?” Susan asked sharply.

“Turns out he’s the one that half hexed my leg off”

“How do you know this?”

“Because he told me!” Mia cried “He told me Dolohov was the one that sent you the devil’s snare— he wanted you to see just how easily he could kill you, if he wanted” she added, gesturing to Susan.

“Why did he tell you this— what is his reasoning in revealing himself to you?” Susan asked

“He wants me to ‘behave’ during the Muggle Born trials, he was threatening me to keep me in line, I guess”

“What did he threaten you with?” Remus asked

Mia’s heart dropped; she didn’t have any intentions of telling them what exactly Yaxley threatened to do, let alone tell Remus that it would be her fault if he got thrown in prison. She bit her lip “To fire me— and ensure I never work for the Ministry again” she lied quickly, not well.

Remus was unconvinced; he saw through her lie as well as Moody’s magical eye had seen through invisibility cloaks. He stared at her for a moment, studying her face as she tried so hard to keep straight. He leaned forward and narrowed his eyes at her, his expression hardening.

“No he didn’t— don’t lie to me” he said sternly “what did he threaten you with?”

Her ears burned hot at his blue eyes pierced into her, his stare too intense to hold. She looked away, rubbing the crook of her neck with her palm as she fought the stinging tears threatening to escape her eyes.

“He knows” she whispered, her voice wavering “my blouse didn’t cover it like I thought— he threatened to send you to Azkaban”

His posture stooped and his expression softened, then hardened again. “And he is Head of Magical Law Enforcement, which means he has all the power to do so.”

“You are going to do as he says” Susan ordered, wagging a finger at Mia “no funny business— you hear me? We must tread carefully in this current state of power”

Mia nodded, wiping her eyes. “All the more reason to move the wedding up” she muttered.

Susan nodded to her, then to Remus. “Alright, if you two want to do this in a couple weeks, then we have work to do.”

* * *

Mia stared at the ceiling as Remus felt around her healing thigh, checking the injury for tenderness. His thumbs pressed gently around the scar, asking her periodically how the injury felt. Penelope laid on their bed next to them, lying on her stomach with her head at the foot of the bed, nose buried in her Ministry-issued Muggle-born questionnaire.

“I can’t even deal with these questions!!” she growled, throwing her face in her arms, muffling her speech. “I’m screwed. Completely, utterly screwed”

“Did you speak with your parents about any other relatives that might have been a witch or wizard?” Remus asked

“I did, there is no one that we know of— I don’t know what I am going to do”

Penelope pushed the papers off the bed with a huff, wiping a few tears from her cheeks roughly as the questionnaire settled in a messy pile on the floor.

“Just fill it out, they’ll schedule you a trial” Mia said calmly “I’m going to see what I can do to help you”

“Don’t get thrown in Azkaban because of me” Penelope sniffed “but at least we’d be able to share a cell when they throw me in there to rot!”

“Penelope, we are not going to let them take you to Azkaban” Remus said calmly “I think this gash just healing from the inside now— how about here?”

His thumbs moved to another section of Mia’s thigh, pressing gently.

“That feels ok” Mia replied

Penelope rolled onto her side, propping her head up with her elbow and picking at a loose thread of the comforter.

“I need a distraction— tell me about wedding stuff, what are you guys doing for your honeymoon?” 

“Well, Delphinus can only give me three days for our honeymoon, so we are pretty limited” Mia said flatly

“We’ll take what we can get.” Remus said “We could just utilize the cottage, you always love it there”

“I do, but I’d like to do something different than just— _fuck!_ "

Mia jumped, nearly kneeing Remus in the face as his thumb pressed against the center of the wound.

“Sorry— looks like it’s just a small part in the middle still healing. Should be good in a couple days.”

“Fuck Yaxley” she growled “this leg has been a pain— literally”

“I know” he kissed her leg just below the wound “I think I know of a place— it was an old safe house the Order used during the first war. It’s just a cabin in the woods, but it’s nice— and has a Jacuzzi”

“Ooh, sounds romantic” Penelope said with a wry smile “Quiet, secluded, relaxing…”

Mia smiled— secluded and relaxing was just what she needed. 

“It sounds absolutely perfect.”

* * *

A few days later and Mia was off her cane, only a slight limp present in her gait. She paced in front of the leather couch in Helen’s office, doing some exercises to help try to strengthen her weakened limb as they talked.

“Remus and I moved the wedding up, my mum is _pissed_ ” Mia said with an eye roll “She had a big to-do planned, but I don’t want to wait.”

“How soon?” Helen asked

“Next week— we’re keeping it simple, I think that’s why she is horrified” Mia laughed “We have to go and get my gown and the bridesmaid dresses this week, but other than that I told her no frills.”

“And you are alright with something quick and simple?”

“Yeah, I don’t need fancy waiters in gold coats and $100 meals. It would be nice to have a large formal wedding, but I don’t need it.” She sat down on the couch, taking a deep breath “I am scared of where this war is going, and I want to be Remus Lupin’s wife at the time of my death, whether that is tomorrow or in 50 years.”

“Admitting the way you feel, _excellent_ ” Helen smirked, receiving an eye roll from Mia “How are you feeling at work, things seem… intimidating, at the Ministry.”

“They are— not only the Head of Magical Law Enforcement a creep, but just having to participate in trials of innocent people makes me sick.”

Mia began picking at her fingernails as Helen shifted uncomfortably at the mention of the Muggle Born registrar, but continued scribbling onto her clipboard without a hiccup.

“How are you going to handle yourself during these trials?” Helen asked “You said that this Yaxley fellow threatened you if you tried to sabotage anything, but I know you—“ she looked up at Mia and rose one brow “You like to cause trouble”

Mia laughed “I can’t just sit back and do nothing— Penelope is my best friend, and I will be damned if they cart her off to Azkaban. I’m not sure what I’m going to do, but I have to help her”

“At the risk of getting caught yourself?”

“I love her, I’d do anything for her” Mia said simply

Helen smiled, looking at the clock then setting her clipboard down.

“Well, Mia our time is up— I want to tell you how proud I am of how far you have come. You are doing so much better with opening up and coping; keep up the good work”

“You sound like this is the last time we are going to see each other” Mia rolled her eyes, chuckling playfully.

“I am graduating you from therapy early— today is your last session”

“What?” Mia said incredulously “But I’ve only been seeing you for 8 months, I don’t think I’m ready for this to be over yet— shit I never thought I’d say that”

Helen chuckled “I think you are, just keep up the good work” she said “I will not be here at St. Mungo’s after this week— however I would like for that to stay between us”

“Why? What happened?”

Helen frowned at her, beginning to pick her own fingernails “The Muggle-born registration happened”

“Are you Muggle-born?” Mia asked softly, her heart dropping.

“No” Helen said heavily “My husband is.”

“Oh— oh I’m sorry…” she said, her face twisting “Maybe I can do something to help…?”

“No, no, you don’t have to do that” she said dismissively “we are leaving the country before the questionnaires are due back”

“You’re going into hiding” Mia said, a statement not a question.

“Allen and I have a three year old son, Chester. We felt it was the best option”

“Let me help you” Mia insisted “The Order of the Phoenix can protect you”

“We already have arrangements,” Helen smiled weakly “but thank you.”

Mia felt an overwhelming surge of emotions flood through her; she wasn’t ready to give up her sessions with Helen, she had grown to enjoy and look forward to their weekly visits. She stood and stepped towards the blonde witch, pulling her out of her chair and embracing her into a tight hug.

“Thank you” Mia whispered as a lump formed in her throat “Thank you for everything you have done for me”

* * *

“Alright, so once we get these dresses we can take them straight to Madam Malkin’s, then—“

“MUM! I know the to-do list, can you _please_ stop talking my ear off?”

“Well _excuse me_ for keeping us on schedule— if you didn’t want to be this overwhelmed then you should’ve given me more than two weeks!”

Maybe she shouldn’t’ve agreed to go dress shopping on the same day as a full moon, for her patience was as thin as a piece of parchment, and she was ready to strangle Susan. Remus had warned her about increased grumpiness, but Mia didn’t fully believe him until today. Sure, her mother had been a touch annoying about wedding plans, especially when she gave her such a short timeline to work with, but hearing her rattle off the laundry list of to-dos was driving her close to madness. Penelope and Tonks served as a buffer between the two women, for Mia was certain that she would’ve cast a full body bind on her mother by now had they not attended the excursion to the bridal shop. They had chosen a muggle shop for their shopping, greeted by a petite saleswoman almost immediately upon arrival.

“Hi! How can we help you?”

“Mia Roswell, I made an appointment at 2:00 for me and my bridal party”

“Yes, have a seat over here; Janet will be with you in just moment!”

The saleswoman ushered to a waiting area of folding chairs to their left. The four of them sat down, Susan chattering Mia’s ear off about dress styles as she rolled her eyes over and over. After a few minutes, an older blonde woman with blunt bangs came trotting over to them, a smile on her face that flashed her crooked, but bright white teeth. 

“Hello! You must be Mia?”

“Yes, and this is my mother, Susan, and my bridesmaids, Penelope and Tonks.” Mia said politely. 

“Tonks?” the woman asked, scrunching her nose at Tonks and her bubblegum pink hair. 

“It’s my surname” Tonks said flatly.

Janet nodded stiffly as she gave Tonks awkward smile “Ooh, well, what a lovely group! I am Janet; I will be your bridal consultant today. What type of gown are we looking for?” 

Janet’s voice was high and bubbly, reminding Mia of a friendlier (or possibly over-caffinated) Dolores Umbridge. She tried not to roll her eyes and the overexcited woman before her, for most clients probably appreciated this enthusiasm. For Mia, the reminder of the toad-like woman only added to her looming irritation underneath the surface.

“I’m not sure; I haven’t tried anything on yet”

“No matter— and for the mother of the bride and the bridesmaids?”

“Burgundy, floor length for the girls” Susan cut in “Any fabric will do— except taffeta, absolutely no taffeta. For me, I was thinking a floor length black gown, something with some shimmer or embellishment to it?— but still elegant and age appropriate for the Mother of the Bride of course”

Janet smiled politely, looking to Mia.

“You heard her— she’s the boss” Mia said with a forced smile.

“Certainly; when is the big day?”

“Next week, Saturday”

“Next… _week?_ ” Janet asked incredulously, her eyes bugging slightly

“Yes, we’ll have to buy off the rack” Susan said “No matter though, I know an excellent seamstress that can rush alterations for us”

“Sure” Janet said with an uneasy smile, her eyes flickering to Mia’s stomach. Mia fought an eye roll, assuming that Janet was thinking this was a shotgun wedding. “Let’s go look at the racks and start picking some things out, bridesmaids first.”

Janet led the ladies to racks and racks of dresses. Susan and Penelope instantly began searching, flipping through dresses and making faces at the ones they didn’t like. Tonks went searching for any dress that was out of the ordinary. Susan made Penelope and Tonks try on about 15 dresses each, waving her hand and dismissing each one until she found suitable dresses for them. (“No Tonks, this one makes your butt look too large— Penelope, this one does nothing for your figure— next!”)

Once the girls had found their Susan-approved bridesmaid dresses, the group with Janet in tow made their way to the bridal gowns, Susan instantly pulling gown after gown (“oh yes, let’s see this one— ooh, maybe this one too”) Mia started looking on a different rack, slowly, feeling overwhelmed by all the choices.

“Mum, why don’t you look at dresses for you while we pick some of these?” Mia said, staring at the overwhelming amount of dresses her mother was pulling.

“No, no I’ll look after we find your gown— ooh, this would look wonderful on your frame!”

Mia looked to Penelope, eyes darting between her and Susan’s gown mountain, mouthing ‘HELP ME’. Penelope nodded, bustling over to Susan. “Susan? Maybe we should start with these first…” 

Over at the dressing rooms, Janet instructed Mia to change into a dress slip and strapless bra before helping into a strapless satin a-line gown, having to clip the back some of the material as the waist was too large. Mia was thankful she had her change into the undergarments alone, fearing what the woman would’ve said about the scarred flesh on her legs. They stepped outside the dressing room and in front of the large mirror to show Penelope and Susan. Mia brushed her hair back, off her shoulders, and Janet gasped. 

“Oh my dear, maybe we should look at something high necked to cover that scar!” 

Mia’s hand flew up to the bite mark on the crook of her neck; in her fear of Janet seeing her legs she had forgotten all about her neck. 

“Oh, no it’s okay. I was bit by a…dog” Mia said quickly. “Vicious attack really. But the scar doesn’t bother me”

“Oh you brave girl! Ok then, let me grab a veil to show you with this dress.” 

Janet scurried around the corner, the four of them busted out laughing when she was out of earshot. 

“Dog bite!” Susan said through a hearty laugh. 

“What should I have said? My fiancé is a werewolf and bit me?” Mia snickered. 

“Actually, that would’ve been hysterical” Tonks said. 

Mia and Susan snorted at the same time and broke out into more fits of laughter. 

“Her face was priceless” Penelope chuckled, trying to take deep breaths to calm herself. 

Janet returned with the veil, and situated it at the crown of Mia’s head. “So… what do we think?” She fluffed the tulle headpiece and smiled broadly to her. Mia studied herself in the mirror, pursing her lips as she swayed slightly. This dress was a princess dress— dress that a fairy tale character would wear. Did her mother really pick this one? The flowers on the bodice were most certainly not her— it was frilly, girly, _ick._

“Janet, I look like a cupcake” Mia said frankly. 

All the ladies burst out in laughter. Janet winked, taking the veil off her head and ushering her back into the dressing room.

“Let’s try something else…”

A couple hours later, and all four ladies left the muggle bridal store with dresses in tow. Susan was rattling off the wedding schedule and details to Tonks (“naturally Reggie will be the ring bearer— we’ll see what Madam Malkin’s has for him when we take our gowns there”) as Penelope linked arms with Mia.

“Does it feel real yet?” she asked with a small smirk

“Sort of” Mia said, smiling back “I knew my mother would relish over this day, but I swear— if I hear any more about the wedding timeline I think I am going to full body bind her and stick her in a closet until this is all over”

* * *

The week was flying by as the rest of the details were finalized and put in place for the wedding. Mia had finished her work week with thankfully no hiccups, surprised to have Delphinus shake her hand and tell her congratulations before leaving the Ministry that Friday afternoon. Penelope, Eric, Susan, Remus and her took a portkey to the cabin Remus and Mia would be spending their honeymoon that Friday afternoon, assisting in making the cabin habitable after sitting dormant for the past few years. The cabin was nestled deep in a forest, tall mature trees surrounding and secluding the wooden structure from the outside world. The canopy of trees reminded Mia of the Forbidden Forest, remembering her nights practicing the Animagus transfiguration with Sirius under the light of the full moon.

The cabin was larger than expected. It was quite grand, the ceilings towering 20 feet high and walls of wood that reached the peak of the Cape Cod ceiling. One side of the cabin was floor to ceiling windows, overlooking the back porch and forest around them. The stone fireplace was larger than any other hearth she had seen— she imagined the entire Weasley family could fit into this fireplace at one time. Everything was covered in a layer of thick dust that disappeared as Penelope, Remus and Susan began waving their wands. Eric admired the forest around them through the wall of windows as Mia stepped out onto the back porch. The cabin was incredibly secluded, it felt safe being this far out from everything. The porch had the Jacuzzi tucked in the corner, Mia lifting the lid back to find it empty. She rustled around in the outdoor cabinets for water chemicals, finding a bottle of chlorine.

“Aguamente” 

With a wave of her hand, the Jacuzzi filled with water instantly. She dumped some of the chlorine into the tub, flinching when she felt arms snake around her waist.

“Something tells me we’ll be using this during our stay?” Remus purred in her ear, kissing her bite.

A heat burned between her legs as she imagined herself straddling Remus in the corner of the Jacuzzi, steam rolling off the water as her cries were lost in the forest around them.

“I’m getting it ready for us now” she giggled “I’ll make sure to pack my swimsuit”

“No” Remus commanded softly, his fingertips tracing the waistband of her jeans as his lips rested against the curves of her ear, whispering huskily to her “no swimsuits allowed”

He could take her right here and now and she would be happy. He could bend her over this Jacuzzi and pound her into bliss and it would be wonderful. His fingertips trailing her waist were antagonizing— she felt his erection grow as it pressed against her body. She was about to suggest they find a quiet room in the cabin to sneak off to for a few minutes when Susan’s sharp voice cut through their moment like a knife.

“ _Remus!_ ” They whirred about to see the witch poking her head out the back door, pursing her lips in irritation. “Come help me with these enchantments!” she barked

Remus sighed heavily as he released Mia. “I’m coming” he called apathetically.

Susan snapped her head back inside and slammed the backdoor shut. 

“She’s driving me fucking _insane_ ” Mia grumbled, rolling her eyes 

Remus chuckled, kissing her forehead and wrapping an arm around her waist “One more day, we can put up with her for another 24 hours”

They slinked inside, Susan barking orders at Remus about the enchantments she wanted put up around the cabin as Mia began to explore. The kitchen was huge; she wondered how many people had originally lived here before it had become a safe house. Remus had told her on the way over that it slept 16 people, and it housed three families shortly before James and Lily were killed.

Mia made her way upstairs, 4 bedrooms were present all with their doors shut. She went into the first room on the left, realizing it was the master once stepping inside. The room had a huge king sized bed, the quilt coated in a layer of dust. She waved her hands over the bed, expelling the dust to reveal a now clean patchwork quilt. It was a charming blanket, reminding her of the patchwork quilt on Charlie’s bed at the Burrow. She wondered to herself if Molly had indeed sewed this very blanket for the previous tenants. There was a wall of built in bookshelves that reminded her of Susan’s living room, a large window with a built in bench situated in the middle. Soft sheer white curtains hung from the window, balancing the natural light peacefully. The room also had its own fireplace that was open on each side to the bedroom and the bathroom. The bathroom was large as well; a huge soaking tub was nestled right up against the fireplace, across from a double sink vanity and a decent sized shower. She pictured her and Remus soaking in the large tub with glasses of champagne, a cozy fire roaring beside them— this cabin seemed like it was going to be the most perfect place to spend their first few nights as husband and wife.

The second bedroom was considerably smaller, but not tiny by any means. It did not have its own bathroom, as it was only a guest room but had a king sized bed coated in dust as well. With a few waves of her hand, the dust dispelled. Blue gingham curtains hung over the window, the bottoms of the panels appearing to have been moth eaten at the hem. A black leather trunk sat at the foot of the bed, the case twice the size of her trunk she took to Hogwarts. 

“Alohomora” she said with a wave of her hand.

The trunk did not budge; she wasn’t sure if it were locked with a stronger charm than Colloportus, or if she wasn’t concentrating hard enough.

“Cistem Aperio”

Once again, nothing. She tried another couple times, before grumbling frustrated swear words under her breath. She pulled her wand out, pointing it directly at the lock.

“Cistem Aperio!”

The trunk blasted open with a burst of white light, revealing a few stacks of blankets, clothes and shoes. Tucked behind the abandon items was a black leather binder, about a quarter inch thick. As she flipped through a couple pages, she realized that this was indeed a photo album. Most of the photos were of people and families she didn’t recognize, but half way through the album she came across a photo of people she did recognize. The group stood in front of a Christmas tree, all smiling and shifting their weight as the photograph played its infinite loop. She recognized this as the first Order of the Phoenix, spotting her mother off to the side next to Dumbledore. Susan looked to be just a couple years older than Mia at the time this photo was taken, the family resemblance uncanny. She spotted Remus in the back of the photo, towering over some of the group’s shorter members. He looked so much younger; his hair was a touch shaggier in this photograph than he kept it normally, sans the distinguished streaks of gray. She smiled at how happy he looked, his toothy smile flashing over and over at her made her stomach flip flop pleasantly. In the front of the group, a pretty woman with long red hair stood next to a dark haired man with glasses, one whom resembled Harry to a tee. She recognized them as James and Lily Potter, having seen photographs of them before from Remus’s own photo album. Next to James stood Sirius, flashing a cocky grin as his weight shifted back and forth in the picture. He looked so handsome, so happy; a tear fell down Mia’s cheek as she brushed her thumb against his portrait. It killed her that she wasn’t going to have him by her side tomorrow; it seemed almost wrong to have such a monumental event without him present. Without her father present. Without Miranda present.

A drink. A drink would make her feel better— a drink to take the edge off of the now painful feelings rising to the surface. _Alcohol is not a coping mechanism._ She reminded herself _you do not need a drink._ She tucked the photo album back inside the trunk, shutting the lid gently. She wiped her face and shook off the emotions now flooding her mind. She looked around the room some more, seeing if there was anything else to explore, anything to distract her and get her out of her own head. Her eyes fell on the bedroom closet, curious as to what might be inside. Another photo album perhaps? Or some board games left over from the previous tenant’s children? She opened the door, fear striking in her very core as she gasped and jumped back. She found herself staring into the horrible, sinister face of Fenrir Greyback.


	52. chapter 52

She stumbled backwards, an ice cold sensation flooding through her body as she pointed her wand at Fenrir Greyback.

“Stupefy!”

A red jet of light hit him square in the chest, and to her surprise, he didn’t even falter; the spell had no effect on him.

“ _What the_ — stupefy!” she cried again, stumbling father.

Fenrir continued to advance on her, smiling that terrible, carnivorous grin that sent shivers down her spine. She screamed for Remus; her scream so shrill and piercing it could break glass. She attempted another stun and tripped, falling backward. She shook violently with terror, beginning to sob as Greyback climbed on top of her and ran his hands up her body.

“Mia?” Susan’s voice came from the hall as she busted into the bedroom with her wand drawn “Mia?— _get off her!_ ”

Susan sent a hex at Fenrir as he turned to look at her, the spell having no effect. He stood, stepping away from Mia and looking to Susan intently, cocking his head to one side.

**CRACK!**

Mia looked up at where Fenrir had stood. She no longer was looking at the savage werewolf, but at herself; her throat was slit, blood was spilling everywhere as she dropped to her knees, grasping at her neck.

“Mia? Mia?!— what’s wrong?!” 

Remus came running into the room with Penelope and Eric on his heels. He took a look at Mia on the floor, then to Mia on her knees in a pool of blood, then to Susan staring at her bleeding daughter wide-eyed and paralyzed by fear. He stepped in front of Susan, and with a loud **CRACK!** The bleeding Mia turned into a glowing full moon emerging from a crowd of dark, ominous clouds.

“Ridikkulus!” 

With a flick of his wand the full moon burst into a puff of smoke, disappearing into thin air. Mia curled up into a tight ball, sobbing into her arms.

“You alright?” Remus whispered to Susan

She nodded, swallowing hard as she regained her composure. Remus went to Mia’s side, sitting on the floor and pulling her into his lap.

“It was just a boggart, it’s gone now”

“It was G-Greyback” she sobbed “I t-tried to f-fight, I t-t-tried”

“It’s ok, shh” he said soothingly “it’s alright— remember, the real him can’t touch you” he brushed the bite on her neck with his thumb, “we made sure of that”

She nodded, burying her tear soaked face into his chest. “I thought h—he was r—real” she squeaked, her voice muffled against his chest.

“I know I know” he whispered, kissing her forehead and holding her close “We’ll finish up; I’ll make you some tea.”

Mia spent the next hour on the couch as the rest of the group tended to the cabin. Her entire body was wrapped in a thick quilt; Remus’s heating charm warming her to her core. She stared at the few chocolate wrappers askew over the couch (Remus always kept a few squares in his travelling cloak) as a piping cup of earl grey warmed her hands. 

She felt so stupid— how did she not realize it was a boggart? She was embarrassed that her boggart took the form of Fenrir Greyback, even after Remus had marked her. She had no reason to fear him anymore; he couldn’t touch her, so why was she still so afraid? If anything, she should be more afraid of Antonin Dolohov at this point, or the Ministry itself, but she just couldn’t get past the way she felt when she pictured those yellowed pointed teeth twisted into his sinister smile.

“There’s these things called doxies upstairs, Susan sent me away— apparently they are deadly to muggles,” Eric called as he bumbled down the stairs, plopping down on the couch next to her. “How are you doing down here— got anymore chocolate?”

He grabbed a package of chocolate off the coffee table, ripping the wrapper open and popping the whole square into his mouth.

“I’m ok” she said softly, fingering the rim of her mug “just embarrassed”

“Why?” Eric asked through a mouthful of chocolate “Penelope said that thing takes the shape of your worst fear—“He swallowed “of course it scared you”

Mia sighed; “I hate that I am afraid of him”

“After seeing what he did to your legs and Bill’s face, I’d be afraid of him too” Eric reached for another chocolate square, his casual demeanor about the spectacle put her at ease. “Penelope said he’s the one who bit Remus?”

“Yeah, when he was a child”

“See? Fucking psychopath pedophile, munching on kids—“Eric shook his head “no reason to be ashamed of being afraid of that”

She shifted uncomfortably, tucking her legs underneath her tighter and hunching her shoulders forward “I give him power over me when I am afraid— I hate being weak”

“You are not weak— far from it. You are a badass chick. You are tough, strong—” he laughed “—can probably drink my whole squadron under the table”

“Damn straight I can” she chuckled softly, smirking at him as she sipped her tea.

“Alright, so we went over every inch of this place—“Remus annouced as he entered the living room. He knelt front of Mia and tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear, brushing her cheek with his thumb. “No more boggarts” he said, his voice returning to normal speaking level “no more surprises”

“Thank you” she said quietly, giving him a weak smile.

“You alright?”

She nodded, then were interrupted by Penelope bustling down the stairs with Susan behind her, “Those little twits are a pain to get rid of,” Penelope said, smoothing down her frizzed hair “but this place is officially doxy free”

“Everything should be all set for you two, I’ll run out to the grocery and pick up some thing for the weekend— including some fresh tea, merlin only knows how long that box has been in the pantry” Susan said, turning her nose up to Mia’s tea mug.

“It tastes fine, mum” she rolled her eyes “but thank you.”

“Alright Remus, you Bill and Kingsley are spending the night at the cottage?” Susan asked

“Yes, they are supposed to be arriving—“he paused and checked his watch “Any time now, I actually need to get going”

“Make sure you gentleman are up and out of the cottage on time, no seeing the bride before the wedding— and do not drink too much tonight, if any of you are hung over tomorrow—“

“ _Mum!_ ” Mia groaned, stifling an eye roll.

“Yes ma’am— we will be in the shed before you floo in” Remus said, trying to hold all sass and sarcasm out of his tone “Mia, what can I do for you before I head out?”

“Nothing, nothing” she said dismissively “go have fun with the boys— were just going to hole up at the flat tonight and do girly things.”

“Alright, I love you” he gave her a quick peck on the lips “if you need anything, you know where I’ll be”

He stepped away and disapparated, Susan not wasting a beat once he was gone.

“Alright, so we need to go over out time schedule for tomorrow— the hairstylists will be arriving at your flat at 9:00 sharp….”

Mia groaned, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at her mother again. If she had to hear the timeline of events one more time, she was going to lose her mind.

* * *

Penelope, Tonks and Mia spent the evening coating their faces in green mud masks, drinking wine and watching Eric’s uniquely curated playlist of movies he compiled from Penelope’s vast VHS collection. Eric was forced to join in on the girl’s evening of pampering, for after the girls had polished off a few glasses of wine they insisted he needed a facial mask and toe nail polish as well. He was a total trooper, laughing as Tonks messily polished his toes a pearlescent grape purple.

“Does this polish make me look manly??” he jeered, flashing Penelope a pearly white smile.

“So manly” Penelope teased “absolute _stud_ ”

“You seem like you’ve done this before, Eric” Mia teased

“I grew up with two younger sisters— many weekends I was forced into letting them give me mani/pedis— in exchange that I used them for paintball target practice. What’s the name of this color? My sisters used to laugh at nail polish names”

“Purple Rain?” Tonks said, scrunching her nose as she read the label at the bottom of the bottle “What the hell is Purple Rain?”

Eric snorted a laugh, looking at Tonks incredulously “Oh come on, you have to know Prince— or I guess the Artist _formerly_ known as Prince…”

Tonks opened her mouth to ask about this as Penelope and Mia raised their glasses and began shout-singing (extremely off key) “ _I never meant to cause you any sorrow, I never meant to cause you any pain….”_

The others didn’t seem to have issues hitting the sack at a decent time that evening, but Mia couldn’t get to sleep. The others seemed lulled into a slumber from the copious amounts of wine they consumed, but Mia was worried she would need a sleeping draught to get her to sleep. Possibly could’ve been the few bottles of wine they’d all shared, but the lyrics to Purple Rain played over and over in her head as she tossed and turned.

_I only wanted to see you, bathing in the purple rain…_

She stared at the ceiling, wishing desperately for it to be Remus next to her, rather than Tonks. Tonks was snoring softly, completely passed out and drooling on the pillow. Her desire was burning inside her, but it didn’t feel right to slip her hand below her waistband with Tonks 6 inches away. She turned her head and looked at the clock; 11:34. She figured Remus and the blokes were probably still awake, but maybe they would be turning in for the night here soon. If only she could be with him at the cottage, to have his hands roam over her body and use her for his pleasure. She felt a heat burn between her thighs just thinking about it. She wanted nothing more than for him to bend her over the mattress and pound her until she couldn’t walk. 

_Purple rain, purple rain…_

Mia threw her pillow on top of her face and exhaled haughtily. _Or pound the goddamn lyrics to this goddamn song out of my head._

She glanced at the clock again; sure, everyone told her it was bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding, but if they hadn’t gone to sleep yet, it still counted as the day before… right? She could apparate to the cottage, jump his bones, then apparate back for a full night’s sleep. Mia smiled, she liked this idea. She sprung out of bed and tore through her dresser drawers, looking for her raciest lingerie set. If she was going to surprise him, she’d do it right. She pulled a slinky black lace chemise from her drawer, pulling her pajamas off and slipping it on. It barely covered her, the sheer fabric leaving nearly nothing to the imagination— just what she was looking for. She fluffed her hair and wrapped herself in her bathrobe.

“Tonks…”

She shook Tonks gently, watching her stir.

“Tonks!” she hissed a little louder.

“Hmm? Wha’?” Tonks grumbled sleepily.

"I’m going to the cottage for a few minutes, I’ll be back”

“mhmm”

Tonks shoved her face sleepily back into her pillow, shifting and resuming her snoring almost immediately. Mia smiled as she stepped away and apparated as quietly as she possibly could. Her feet it the floor of Remus’s bedroom, the sound of music playing and men laughing came from down the hall and around the corner. She dug through the closet to find a few spare candles, spacing them around the room and whispering the incantation whist waving her hand gently. She removed her bathrobe and sat in the chair in the corner of the room, crossing her legs and fluffing her hair— she was hoping he would be coming to bed any minute, the earwormed lyrics still replaying in her head as she sat patiently in the quiet room.

_Purple rain, purple rain…_

After an eternity of nearly slipping into Purple Rain earworm madness, Remus’s voice grew closer to the bedroom, along with clumsy footsteps bumbling down the hallway.

“Hold on, I’ve got to leak!” he slurred.

He opened the door, his eyebrows rising into his hairline when he noticed her in the corner. She stood, allowing him to drink in the sight of her.

“Dear god…” he whispered

“I’ve been waiting for you for 45 minutes” she said teasingly “I wanted to surprise you”

She walked up to him, running her hands over his chest as she bit her lip. He reached out and stroked her right breast, breathing heavily as he eyed her up and down.

“Oh, I’m surprised all right” he said softly, his hand snaking into her hair “you are— _holy shit_ you are so hot”

“You smell like scotch” she giggled, giving him a soft kiss “you taste like it too”

“I’m more concerned with what you taste like” he growled, crashing his lips against hers.

He pushed her against the wall, his hands roaming over her body as they snogged furiously. She tugged at his belt, working quickly to get it undone when he stopped suddenly, grabbing her wrists and pinning them to the wall above her head.

“What was the color of the couch in my office at Hogwarts?” he asked, his voice whisper soft and gravelly

“What?” she asked, crinkling her nose.

His wand was at her throat faster than she could blink, all traced of desire seeming to vanish as he gritted his teeth, looking at her intently. One hand held her wrists firmly above her head as his wand pushed into the soft skin of her neck.

“Remus— it’s me!”

“What color was the couch?” he growled

“Emerald green” she squeaked softly “gold stitching on the arm.” She added.

He smiled with immense relief, kissing her firmly “I am so glad you aren’t a Death Eater” he laughed.

He picked her up and carried her to the bed, plopping her down onto her back as he peppered her skin with kisses.

“That’s not a very secure question, you know” she said, her back arching as his fingers curled around the waistband of her thong “how many students were in your office that year?”

“Good point— but I believe _you_ were the one who spent the most time on it”

He threw the thin scrap of fabric over his shoulder and positioned his head between her thighs. He teased her slit with his fingertips, her legs spreading wider instinctively

“So wet for me already…” he purred

His tongue brushed against her clit, her hips bucking as his feather soft flicks drove her mad. She bit her lip as she whimpered, allowing herself to succumb to pleasure.

“Remus— hey Remus, did you fall in the toilet or something?” Bill’s voice called, dangerously close to the door.

Remus didn’t so much as get to move his head as Bill barged into the bedroom, catching full sight of the witch in a very compromising position. Mia’s ears burned hot, grabbing the pillow to cover her chest as Remus snapped her knees shut. Bill cleared his throat awkwardly as he turned away, his pale skin flushed to a deep shade of crimson.

"What the hell!” Remus growled “Ever heard of knocking?”

“uhm, sorry—“ he mumbled “what are you doing here, Mia?”

“Just here to get laid” she said flatly

“Can we have a minute, please?” Remus asked, stifling the irritation in his voice.

“Yeah yeah— we’ve got shots of firewhisky lined up for when you two are finished”

Bill scurried off down the hall, they both breaking out into laughter once they were alone. 

“My goddamn friends don’t know how to knock” he chuckled, spreading her legs again and kissing the inside of her thigh a few times.

They rolled around under the sheets, laughing and kissing as he brought her to climax over and over, speaking lewd and indecent things in her ear that were reserved for the bedroom only. Mia relished in her pleasure, allowing him to take her in every which way he pleased, wanting no part of her body left untouched by the nights end. She begged him for more, she wanted his dirty words whispered against her skin and his bruising touch groping and feeling all of her. His grip was tight against her waist as he guided her hips against his, her fingernails digging into his chest as her moans grew louder and more urgent, her body craving another release.

“Come for me again” he coaxed “that’s it, come on— one more”

She did as she was told, pleasure rolling through her as she collapsed onto his chest, panting and glistening with sweat.

“How was that?” He murmured

She chuckled softly “You are just showing off at this point”

Remus kissed the top of her head, smirking. “How many was that? 3?”

“4” she breathed

“4? Wow, that’s a new record for us…” 

“I told you— show off”

He shifted to look at her, raising an eyebrow “Are you complaining?”

“Absolutely not” she laughed

Remus chuckled, his fingertips moving up her back in circular motions, massaging her as she nuzzled herself against him.

“Stay with me tonight— I want you next to me when I wake up”

“No I can’t! Its bad luck to see the bride before the wedding!” she giggled

“Well, it technically is our wedding day, so we shot that to hell”

He gestured to the clock; 12:49. Mia laughed and buried her face back into his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him.

“I can’t believe I am marrying you today” he whispered in her ear “you are the most perfect bride a man could ask for”

“Whispering sweet nothings in my ear to try to get me to stay… so manipulative” she teased, peppering his bare, scarred flesh with kisses “I told Tonks I would be back shortly, I really do need to get home”

“You are home, what’s mine is yours”

Mia kissed him again before climbing off him, plucking her robe from the back of the armchair and wrapping herself tightly, yawning.

“Don’t apparate— take the floo” he ordered, not unkindly “You’re tired; I don’t want you to splinch yourself”

“Alright, _Susan_ ” she rolled her eyes “I’ll take the damn floo— I should say hello to Bill and Kingsley anyway”

They stepped out into the living room, Bill and Kingsley in a heated game of cards as they smoked fat cigars and sipped glasses of scotch.

“Finally you two are done! The shots of firewhisky have been sitting out for nearly an hour” Kingsley jeered

“Sorry gentleman, my beautiful wife needed me for a moment” Remus said with a wry smile.

Bill flushed, not meeting Mia’s eyes “uhm, you want a shot too, Mia?”

“No that’s alright, I’m just going to floo back— you boys have fun”

She stepped over to the fireplace, pulling Remus into one last kiss.

“I’ll see you tomorrow” she whispered.

She stepped into the fireplace, spiraling out of sight. A moment later, she emerged in the living room of her flat, and tiptoed into her bedroom. Tonks was still sound asleep, snoring softly with her arm hanging over the side of the mattress. Mia giggled as she changed back into her regular pajamas, slipping into bed and settling comfortably on her back. Her heart felt full and her body satisfied; she took a few deep breaths, willing herself to nod off.

_Purple rain, purple rain…_

“Goddamnit” she growled under her breath.

She reached into her nightstand drawer, pulling out a vial of sleeping draught. _This will get that goddamn song out of my head._ She downed the vial, settling back onto her pillow and drifting off to sleep almost immediately.

* * *

The day was here. The day she has dreamed of since she was a little girl. Waking up next to Tonks snoring and drooling all over Remus’s pillow wasn’t exactly the first sight she wanted to see when she opened her eyes, but it was such a hilarious sight that Mia silently dug through her closet for her Polaroid camera and snapped a photo of the sleeping witch. She froze, her heart skipping a beat when the flash made Tonks stir, but she rolled over and resumed her soft snoring. Mia shook the photograph, chuckling silently as she slipped it into one of her drawers, planning on using it as a prank on her friend at a later date.

She slipped into the bathroom and turned the shower on full blast. The shower was hot and soothing; she would’ve loved to have Remus in here with her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her neck gently as the hot water ran over her. _You just fucked him last night, you can wait 12 hours._ She scolded herself, her scar on her neck beginning to warm as she imagined his body pressed against hers.

She grabbed a dollop of shampoo and began scrubbing her scalp, wishing it was his large, firm hands massaging her head as he made her clean for him. She felt arousal grow as she grabbed a bar of soap and wash cloth hastily from the soap rack. _You can have all the sex you want tonight_ she told herself as she lathered the wash cloth with suds. Feeling the soft terry cloth against her nipples sent shock waves down between her legs. She began to ache with need, her bite almost tingling as she felt a low pull in her core.

She gave into her body’s begging instincts and stopped washing. She leaned back against the tile wall, sliding her hand between her legs and circling her clit with her index finger. She sighed deeply and closed her eyes; she imagined Remus behind her, his one hand working between her legs and his other running along the curves of her body, making his way up to her breasts and giving her nipples their much deserved attention. She bit her lip as began to work her free hand on her left nipple, her index finger of her other hand working faster. Her body began to tremble as she was building up to release. She imagined Remus’s breath on her neck, kissing her bite gently as he murmured “you’re mine, all mine” in her ear. Her breathing quickened, she was almost over the edge when a voice hollered

“Mia! Susan and the hairstylists are here, hurry up!!”

It was Penelope; calling through the bathroom door, interrupting her rather pleasant fantasy.

“Fuck” she growled irritably under her breath. 

She had lost it, her arousal back down to a small pang of need due to the rather rude interruption. She grabbed her washcloth and began hurriedly washing the rest of herself.

“I’ll be out in a second!” 

Stepping out of the shower, she dried herself at lightning speed, vigorously rubbing her towel over her body to absorb all the water. She hated the feeling of rubbing a towel over the scars on her legs; the scratches almost felt numb to the touch, an odd sensation against terry cloth. She walked over to her dresser and grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a tank top out of her top drawer. Her reflection made her stop and look at herself again in the mirror, her dark hair falling in damp tendrils around her face. She smiled slightly at her own reflection, her stomach flip-flopping in excitement. _I’m getting married today._

* * *

Susan floo-ed in ahead of the girls to survey that the cottage had been vacated then returned and ushered the girls through the hearth. The moment Mia’s feet hit the ground, she felt an arm wrap around her waist and pull her inside the master bedroom. Penelope and Tonks were right behind her, hustling with the bags of dresses. Mia craned her neck to look over her shoulder, fighting Susan’s embrace.

“Is he here?” she asked

“Should be, he said they would be in the shed when you arrived” Susan replied.

“You want me to go check? See what their up to?” Tonks asked

“Yes, go see what they’re up to, and tell them not to come inside this room!” 

Susan fussed over a piece of Mia’s hair that was disheveled from the floo as Penelope hung the dresses against the doorframe. Mia shot Tonks a sympathetic look, who returned a wink.

“I’ll be right back” she said cheerily, trotting out of the room.

She scurried through the cottage and out the front door, walking towards the shed. The gravel drive crunched under her shoes as she stepped. The soft breeze coming off the water was pleasant and refreshing— the lake that was to serve as the backdrop for the wedding, reflecting beautiful mature trees in its glassy surface. The sky was blue with only a few fluffy white clouds billowing off in the distance. She walked up to the graying wooden shed and rapped on the door a few times. The door popped open, and Kingsley stuck his head out, peering around her before speaking.

“Oh, Dora, it’s just you— Come in”

Tonks stepped into the small wooden shed to find Bill and Remus standing around a bubbling cauldron of bright peach-colored liquid, looking rather ill. She turned her attention back to Kingsley, his typical rich dark complexion more ashy and sickly in appearance than normal. He placed a hand on the small of her back, leading her over to the brewing cauldron. She crinkled her nose as she peered at the potion, the overpowering scent of ginger wafting in her nostrils.

“What is this?” she asked

“We had a little too much to drink last night” Bill said sheepishly, running his hand through his flaming red hair. “Damn those firewhisky shots…”

“Susan will kill you if she finds out you all are hung over on her daughter’s wedding day” she snickered.

“Exactly, which is why you need to keep her out of here” Kingsley said “She will flip if she sees this hangover potion— it still needs another hour”

Tonks let out a cackle, looking at the three of them with a devilish grin. “Sure, I can do that— how ya feeling, Remus?”

“I’ll let you know once I get this hangover cured” he grumbled. 

* * *

Susan’s checklist of to-do’s was about to get set on fire, Mia was just waiting for the moment her mother put down her stupid parchment to torch the damn thing. Everything was going to go smoothly at this point, she knew it. The chairs, lights and dance floor were set up, Molly was due to arrive with the food just before guests were, at this point they were just waiting until it was time to stuff themselves into dresses.

“I need these men to help me with the protective wards” she said, looking at one of the last items on her checklist. “Then I think we are set. We’ll go over the reception time line when I get back” 

She set the list on the dresser and went to leave the bedroom, when she was stopped by Tonks blocking the doorway.

“They’re a little busy at the moment— maybe you guys can do that last?”

“It should be done now before the guests begin arriving, because the spell were using only allows those whose names are on a special parchment to enter.” 

Susan placed her hand on Tonks’s shoulder to move her out of the way. Tonks bit her lip, wracking her brain for any excuse to knock Susan off her course.

“Here, let me go— I’ll ask them for you” 

“Tonks… why are you trying to keep me in here?” 

Susan narrowed her eyes, studying Tonks as Mia and Penelope were watching the interaction curiously.

“N-nothing, just trying to let you relax!” Tonks sputtered.

Susan’s brow rose as she pursed her lips, giving her an intense gaze that thickened the tension in the room. Tonks let out a squeak of submission, throwing her face in her hands.

“Kingsley, Remus and Bill drank way too much last night and are all hung over— so they are trying to brew a hangover potion to cure it before the ceremony!” 

Susan clenched and unclenched her jaw a couple times as Mia and Penelope burst out into giggles. Susan whipped her head around and glared at them, her irritation visible in her expression.

“I specifically said— _ooh_ they are testing my patience…” Susan pushed Tonks aside, gritting her teeth “They are grown men, they should’ve known better!” she hollered as she stormed out of the bedroom.

“She is going to kill them…” Tonks muttered

Mia, Penelope and Tonks crowded around the window of the bedroom, watching Susan stomp to the shed and yank the door open. They heard her angry shouts clearly from outside, cringing and giggling nervously. (“On my daughter’s wedding day????”) They watched as Susan drug Bill and Remus out of the shed by the scruff of their necks, with Kingsley slinking along behind her. She gave all the men what looked like a serious talking to by the wagging of her right index finger, and shoved small scrolls into each of their hands.

“Maybe we should’ve put her in a full body bind” Penelope whispered as they watched the men and Susan putting up the protective enchantment.

“Quick,” Mia said, turning her attention to the parchment on top of the dresser “Burn the checklist before she gets back; I can’t take that damn thing anymore!”

* * *

“Is this tight enough?”

Susan laced up the back of Mia’s gown, tugging it snug. The gown was white lace with delicate thin shoulder straps and fitted down to the knee. It hugged her curves perfectly, the deep v neckline drew the eye upward, drawing attention to the sparkling chandelier earrings she interchanged from her garnet studs she wore on a daily basis. She opted to wear her garnet pendant that she almost never took off, ignoring Susan’s protests that she should wear something that matched her earrings.

“I hope you don’t have to pee tonight, because good luck doing that in this dress” Tonks teased

“That’s what you and Penelope are for,” Mia flashed her friend a toothy smile “to hold my dress while I pee, and hold my hair if I puke”

Mia slid her veil into her hair as Susan fluffed the train of the gown, tears in her eyes and sniffing dramatically.

“Oh, I just can’t believe my sweet girl is getting married!”

Mia rolled her eyes, but turned around to kiss her mother on the cheek.

“I love you, mum” she said “I’ve wanted to kill you over these wedding plans, but you know I am glad to have your help.

“I love you, baby girl. So, _so_ much” Susan said, her emerald green eyes twinkling. “I know I’ve been a little demanding…”

“A little?” Tonks snorted.

Susan shot Tonks a dangerous look, shutting her up instantly.

“I expect perfection for my daughter’s big day, nothing less…” She said, turning to look around the room “Let me check my list one more time before we get into place— where the hell did I put that paper?”

The girls all looked at each other sheepishly as Susan began turning a few items in the room over, looking for her checklist that was unknowingly reduced to ash. A knock at the bedroom door distracted her, Eric’s voice coming through the door.

“Is it safe for me to come in? Everyone dressed?”

“Yes, come in!” Susan said

Eric stepped into the bedroom dressed in a crisp gray suit, grinning wide at the ladies before him. 

“You all look amazing” he said, flashing his pearly white teeth and kissing Penelope on the cheek “I was sent to inform you guys it’s time to line up”

Mia turned to her reflection and smiled, but felt a pang of sadness. She had always imagined her father being here on her wedding day, to walk her down the aisle and give her away. Susan placed her hand on Mia’s shoulder.

“Ready, sweetie?” she asked softly.

“Yes” Mia whispered, shaking off her thoughts “yes— I’m ready”

Her stomach was in knots as they lined up to walk down the aisle. She clutched her bouquet of roses firmly as she took a few deep breaths, steadying her heartbeat. Music started; Penelope and Tonks walked first, one by one turning the corner and out of Mia’s sight. Susan linked her arm with Mia’s, nodding to each other before they stepped around the corner. After a moment, Arthur’s voice amplified by a sonorous charm addressed the crowd.

“Please stand for the bride”

The look on Remus’s face as he saw her walking towards him was that of pure happiness. He looked as if he had never known misery, pain, sadness or heartache ever in his life by the smile on his face. The scene around her disappeared as Mia’s sole attention was on the man who was about to become her husband, a lump forming in her throat as they looked into each other’s eyes. He looked so handsome, standing before her in a crisp black suit, his bow tie nestled perfectly below his Adam’s apple, his grey streaked sandy hair combed perfectly into place. She wanted to cry tears of joy, to run into his arms and embrace him, only to never let go.

Susan and Mia reached the altar; Arthur smiled broadly, his eyes twinkling at them.

“Who gives this woman to this man?” Arthur asked

“I do” Susan said 

Susan kissed Mia on the cheek and stepped away. She sat down in the first row of chairs as Mia took her place in front of Remus, joining hands. Arthur began speaking, but she didn’t hear a word of it. She gazed into his crystal blue eyes, feeling an overwhelming surge of love for the man standing before her. Arthur could’ve been speaking in tongues for all she knew at this point, but she didn’t care, as long as his speech ended with her married. Her mind was swimming with too many thoughts and emotions she couldn’t focus.

“Now the couple will exchange their vows”

This sentence snapped her attention back on the words Arthur was speaking, her palms beginning to sweat against Remus’s as her heart pitter-pattered in her chest.

“Alright Remus, you first” Arthur whispered to him, giving him a nod.

“I, Remus John Lupin, take you, Amelia Evelyn Roswell, to be my wife. To honor, love and cherish you, in sickness and in health, today, forever and always”

His hand shook as he slid her wedding ring onto her left finger, his breathing slightly ragged. His thumb brushed her knuckles as he squeezed her hand reassuringly, flashing another wide, toothy smile at her.

“I, Amelia Evelyn Roswell, take you, Remus John Lupin, to be my husband. To honor, love and cherish you, in sickness and in health, today, forever and always.” 

She slid his wedding band onto his finger, her stomach flip flopping in excitement. Arthur then grabbed a thin silver cord from his pocket, and asked them to join left hands. They gripped each other’s hand and watched as Arthur wrapped the cord around them, then taking his wand and speaking an incantation that made the cord glow, a head radiating from the center of their hands that spread throughout her whole body.

“These two people are now joined together, to spend their days on this earth now as one. With this, it gives me great pleasure to announce—“

Mia began to bounce up and down with excitement, her grin spreading ear to ear.

“The new, Mr. Mrs. Remus and Amelia Lupin. Remus, you may kiss your bride”

Mia flung herself into Remus’s arms, kissing him with bruising force. He picked her up and spun her around once as they kissed, the audience roaring with applause.

“I love you, Mrs. Lupin” he whispered, grinning furiously

Mia giggled, taking his hand and turning back to the audience. Penelope handed her the bouquet of roses, which she raised in the air and cheered. She was on cloud nine, nothing could spoil this day.

* * *

“Hi, everyone, I’m Kingsley Shacklebolt, the best man—“

“Everyone here knows who you are, Kingsley!” Mia called, chuckling as she clung onto Remus’s arm.

“Alright alright” he waved his hand to dismiss her, tugging at his collar “Well, I don’t know how I can follow such a beautiful speech from our maid of honor Penelope here, but I’ll do my best. I have had the pleasure of knowing Remus and Mia both for many years now…”

Everyone sat around their tables with glasses of champagne raised as Kingsley gave his best man toast. Mia felt so much love as everyone came up to their table to congratulate them, having the entire Order here was perfect. She didn’t need a giant fuss with waiters and frills, just having the people she loved surrounding her was enough. Molly bustled over to their table with a plate of steak, green beans and baked potatoes, setting their plates down in front of them.

“Mia, yours is medium, and Remus yours is so rare I can still hear it moo-ing”

“Thank you Molly— for everything today”

Molly smiled warmly at them, kissing both of their cheeks “Of course, it was my pleasure”

The witch made her way to her seat as the rest of the wedding guests were preparing their plates from Molly’s extensive buffet. Mia sliced a bite of steak off, popping it in her mouth and was horrified

at what she was eating. It was so tough— overdone, cooked way to long. She looked at the center of the steak, it was a perfect medium. How on earth was it this tough to her? She looked at Remus’s plate, her mouth beginning to water as he was raising a bite of steak to his mouth. He stopped with his fork in midair, his face puzzling. She stared at him, her eyes moving back and forth between his fork and his eyes. He held the piece of steak out to her, smirking slightly. She took the bite, letting out an audible hum of satisfaction as the heavenly piece of meat melted in her mouth. He chuckled, slicing his steak in half and giving a piece to her. She greedily sliced it up, taking a bite and smiling sheepishly at him.

“’Fucking disgusting’, I believe were your exact words?” He asked smugly

She flushed a deep shade of scarlet “Shut up” she grumbled.

They took a few minutes to eat, many of the wedding guests approaching Remus and Mia to give their congratulations. After the guests had finished eating, Kingsley stepped into the middle of the reception space, amplifying his voice as he pointed his wand at his throat.

“Alright, it’s time for the bride and groom to have their first dance— Remus, Mia—“ 

Kingsley gestured for them to join him. They rose from their chairs, making their way to the dance floor. A violin started playing a slow, peaceful melody as they began to waltz together, Mia resting her cheek against Remus’s chest, allowing him to lead her gently around the dance floor.

“I love you” she whispered

He didn’t reply, but kissed the top of her head. She felt like she was melting into him, his embrace was warm and comforting. The song must’ve been quick, because she felt like she barely got to blink before the music changed to something just a little more upbeat.

“Let’s have a round of applause for the newlyweds, shall we?” Kingsley’s deep voice boomed through his sonorous charm

The guests clapped furiously; Fred and George wolf whistled as Mia and Remus gave silly, grandiose bows to the audience.

“Now, a few of us planned something to surprise Mia with—“

Mia looked between Kingsley and Remus with a puzzled expression, Remus returning a warm smile with a twinkle in his eye.

“We are missing a very important man in Mia’s life today; her father, John Roswell. A few of us men would like to ask Mia to a dance in place of him for the father daughter dance, even though we cannot even hope to take his place in her heart”

Kingsley took Mia’s hand, leading her into a waltz. He stepped on the hem of her dress almost immediately, clumsily swaying in a circle and messing up which foot he was supposed to stepping with.

"Sorry, I’m not much of a dancer…”

“It’s alright” she laughed, “here, let me lead”

Mia took the lead from him, the waltz only going a tad bit smoother with her in control of their pattern. 

“you didn’t have to do this, you know”

“We wanted to— it was Remus’s idea, he knew how much you would’ve wanted your dad here”

She led Kingsley in the awkward dance for just a few bars longer when Bill stepped up, taking Kingsley’s place.

“How you doing today, Mia? Overwhelmed yet?”

Bill was a much better dancer than Kingsley was, leading their dance with very little effort.

“Completely overwhelmed— any advice from one married person to another?”

“Well, seeing as how I have only been married three weeks…” Both of them laughed, then fell silent for a moment as they swayed back and forth. Bill chuckled awkwardly in the moment of silence between them. “Sorry about last night, by the way…”

“It’s ok” she said quickly, blushing “we never have to speak of it again”

Bill smiled gratefully, making idle conversation about his and Fleur’s future plans until Arthur cut in and took his place. Something about dancing with Arthur brought a lump to her throat— maybe because he was more of a father figure to her, unlike Kingsley and Bill who were more her friends? Maybe because he gave such a beautiful, heartfelt ceremony, despite her barely hearing a word of it? She smiled at the balding wizard, fighting the sting of tears in her eyes.

“Arthur, thank you for officiating our ceremony, it was lovely”

“Oh absolutely, anything for you sweetheart”

Arthur was a wonderful dancer as well, as well poised as Bill had been. She wasn’t expecting Arthur to hand her off to Eric, but something about Eric having served with her father made her even more emotional in this moment. The stinging tears won their battle, sliding down her cheeks as Eric and she began their waltz.

“Your dad and I served for a few years together, and he was one of the best guys I have ever known” Eric said, “He would’ve been so happy today, I know it.”

“Thank you, Eric” she sniffled

“I’m sorry we got off on such a weird start, you know, with me trying to butt in on you and Remus—“

“Nothing of it” she said “It’s in the past. I’m really happy for you and Penelope, by the way”

“Thanks, she really is spectacular” he said with a brilliant smile “she’s been everything I’ve wanted in a partner”

“I’m bias, but I think she’s the greatest” Mia laughed. “She is happy with you, I can tell.

She rested her head against Eric’s chest, allowing a few more tears to escape. Her heart could burst she felt so loved by all these wonderful people.

* * *

Her feet ached from dancing for the last few hours, feeling on cloud nine as Remus picked her up and spun her around over and over, his hair falling into his eyes and his collar open. The sun had set, the stars shining bright over the still water of the lake, the only ripples in the water coming from a small row boat that Fred and George were piloting out onto the water to light off fireworks. The sky lit up with bursts of orange, pink and red; the wedding guests cheered happily as Remus pulled her into a passionate kiss. They looked up at the sky as the fireworks now spelled out _‘Congratulations Remus and Mia’_ , illuminating the lake below.

“You ready to get out of here?” he murmured in her ear.

She nodded; He took her hand and led her over to Kingsley, a broomstick in one hand and a sleeping Reggie cradled in his other arm.

“Your transportation” Kingsley grinned, holding the broom out in front of him

“Uh… my dress is too tight to sit on a broomstick…”

“Sit with your legs off to the side and hold onto me” Remus mounted the broom as Mia looked at him with uncertainty. “I won’t let you fall, trust me”

Mia swore softly and awkwardly sat sideways behind him, one arm wrapped around his torso as the other gripped the broom handle.

“Ready, Mrs. Lupin?” Remus said with a wide toothy grin

“Ready” she smiled nervously

They kicked off, Mia’s stomach lurching as it took her a moment to steady herself. Sitting on the broomstick as if she were riding a horse sidesaddle was awkward, but once she figured out how to distribute her weight, she felt much more secure. The guests cheered as she and Remus soared into the sky, the cottage and their friends growing smaller and smaller below them. Mia rested her face on Remus’s back, smiling as she felt the wind in her hair, and her heart bursting with love. 


	53. chapter 53

“Good Morning, Mrs. Lupin”

Mia opened her eyes, blinking a few times as Remus came into view. He lay on his side, head propped up by his elbow, and his graying hair falling in his eyes.

“Mmm, morning” Mia mumbled

She stretched and sat up, yawning wide. The bedroom was a mess; Remus’s suit was in pieces, strewn about the room. Her gown was laid over the dresser next to a half drunken bottle of tequila, and her slip crumpled in a heap on the floor next to the bed. Her veil was over the side table lamp, perfectly encasing the lamp shade from where Remus had ripped it out of her hair the previous night. She looked down at her left hand, her ring finger not only donning her teardrop diamond, but a matching white gold band nestled just below. A smile slowly crept across her face as she fidgeted with her rings.

“We got married yesterday” she said softly

“Did we?? Damn, I _knew_ I had too many tequila shots…”

Mia smacked Remus’s arm playfully. “asshole” she muttered under her breath with a chuckle, swinging her legs around to stand. “I need coffee— you want some?”

“Please—“ Remus watched curiously as she yanked the sheet off the bed, wrapping it around her slender frame. “Why are you covering up? It’s just us”

She laughed “Seeing as how the last time I left a bedroom barely dressed Albus Dumbledore showed up, I’m not taking any chances”

Once in the kitchen, she clanked around the cabinets for coffee mugs, thankful that Susan had stocked the cabin with fresh coffee and groceries for the weekend. 

“Make it extra strong— my head is _pounding_ ” Remus said as he entered the kitchen. She felt his long arms wrap around her waist, kissing her neck so gently it gave her goosebumps. “You’re so beautiful, you know that…?” he murmured in her ear. 

“Shut up, you always say that” she teased. 

“Because it’s true”

He trailed gentle kisses down her neck and shoulder as she leaned her neck to the side, allowing him better access. 

“What do you want to do today, Mrs. Lupin?”

He gently suckled her flesh, leaving small red hickeys in perfect formation. She closed her eyes, sighing and leaning back against his lanky frame. 

“Can we duel?” she asked through her sigh “We can use that clearing up around the corner”

Remus stopped suddenly, chuckling “that’s not what I expected you to say”

“What— you wanted me to tell you I want you to fuck me in every room of this cabin by the days end?”

Remus smiled a toothy, boyish smile “well, yeah— I mean— it’s our honeymoon…”

Mia laughed, rolling her eyes and turning to face him. She wrapped her arms around his torso, craning her neck up to look at him as she rested her chin against his chest “I want to practice my dueling spells wandless, and since you are such an excellent teacher, Professor Lupin…” 

“In what area of my expertise are you referring?” He said with a teasing grin.

Mia gave him the most innocent, wide eyed look, once he remembered from their days at Hogwarts when she would show up to class with her shirt unbuttoned a little farther than typical. The look that would make his cock twitch every time his eyes caught sight of her showcasing her shapely cleavage. She knew it drove him mad, but that’s what made her do it.

“Why, Defense Against the Dark Arts, of course” she said innocently. She bit her lip, raising her brow and reaching her hand to touch him “but maybe after that lesson you could teach me something else…?”

“Mia…” He growled as her hand grazed over the front of his boxers “If you tease me like that, we won’t make it out of this kitchen. I will bend you over every surface in this room and fuck you until you cannot walk”

“I really want that but I also _really_ need the dueling practice…” She said with a wry smile.

“Then no teasing—“ He kissed her forehead, laughing and relaxing his posture. “We’ll duel after breakfast; I’m starving”

“Tell you what— instead of _teasing…_ ” She slipped a hand inside his boxers and wrapped her practiced hand around his cock. She stroked him a few times, eliciting an involuntary groan “let me just take care of you, and then we can eat and duel…”

She sunk down onto her knees, taking him in her mouth. He sighed, snaking a hand in her hair. “I won’t argue to that”

She rolled her tongue around his shaft as she took him deeper, allowing his entire length to slide in and out of her lips. She loved the power she had over him in this state, the power to make him come undone all from her touch. Her one hand gripped the base of his cock firmly as her other roamed gently up the inside of his thigh, then gently cupping and caressing his balls. Her velvet tongue worked in overtime to pleasure him, eager for him to let go in her mouth. His breathing became more rapid, his grip on her hair tighter and tighter.

“ _Shit_ — Mia, I’m about to—“

He didn’t even get to finish his sentence, his body tensed as he spilled down her throat. She drank him up, licking and sucking him until he began to soften. She wiped her bottom lip with her thumb and gazed up at him, grinning.

“How was that?”

“You,” he said breathlessly “are amazing— an absolute _goddess._ ”

* * *

“Alright, you ready?” Remus called

They stood facing each other in the clearing, 25 feet apart. Remus’s wand was drawn and ready as Mia held her palms out in front of her.

“Ready!— _stupefy!_ ”

A jet of red shot out from Mia’s palm, immediately blocked by Remus’s shield charm. They shot a few spells back and forth; Mia had to focus more energy than she realized she would just to produce a proper shield. It was mentally tiring and hard to focus on what she needed to do when Remus was dueling with excellent proficiency. In her inability to concentrate on multiple tasks, her stance faltered, allowing a stunning charm to clip her left shoulder. The spell sent her flying backwards, hitting the ground with a thud and skidding backwards a few feet.

“Just because you don’t have a wand doesn’t mean that you can get lazy!” Remus shouted, jogging towards her “You need to watch your stance, you left your left side open”

“Did you really have to hit me? You could’ve just reminded me” she groaned, sitting up

“I did remind you” He smirked “I needed to make you painfully aware of it— guarantee now you’ll pay more attention” he reached his hand out, pulling her up to stand “You alright? You ready to go again, or you need a minute?”

She brushed off the front of her shorts “No, I’m fine, let’s go again”

They spent the next hour dueling, all of which ended with Remus sending Mia flying onto her back. Her exhaustion was visible in her posture, he able to defeat her quicker and quicker the more they dueled. She was stubborn, insisting that if they just tried one more time she could beat him.

“Come on, let’s take a break— you are exhausted” he chuckled 

“I’m fine, really— _Impedimenta!_ ”

Remus laughed as he shielded her jinx, and then sent her flying onto her back again “We can hit it again after you rest” 

He helped her stand, ignoring her indignant stare as he joined his hand in hers. They began their short walk back to the cabin as she rolled her shoulders and stretched her neck. She wished Remus’s legs weren’t so long, for his steps were much larger than hers, forcing her to walk faster just to keep pace.

“That was bullshit— I was the best one in dueling club _with_ my wand”

“I’m sure it’ll get easier the more you practice, wandless magic is extremely complex”

“I hope— I will say though, you are a magnificent teacher” she said, giggling for the first time in over an hour “patience of a saint”

He chuckled, his eyes sparkling as he looked down to her “Hogwarts was my favorite job to date. I do miss being able to teach”

Mia smiled, squeezing his hand as they walked back to the cabin. They were silent for a moment, both of them lost in their own thoughts. She eyed him as they walked, admiring his strong shoulders as his muscles rippled underneath his shirt. He caught her staring, smirking and raising a brow.

“What are you staring at?” he laughed

“Oh, I was just thinking about how handsome you are…” He rolled his eyes playfully as she squeezed his hand again. “Annnnnddddd I was wondering if you would rather break in the dining room table, or the kitchen counter?”

Remus grinned mischievously “both.”

With a playful roar, he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. They howled with laughter as he jogged to the cabin with her, both of their laughs echoes dying in the forest around them.

* * *

“Would you like your steak grilled rare, Mrs. Lupin?”

Mia watched from the couch as Remus trimmed the steaks for grilling in the kitchen, wearing nothing but a black apron. She giggled at the sight of his white butt cheeks sticking out from behind the apron, but she had insisted he wear it for the laughs. They were completely carefree here, living in a romantic bubble that seemed like nothing from the outside world could penetrate. She would stay here with him forever if she could, never return to the prejudice, harsh reality that she was growing to hate.

“Aren’t you tired of calling me Mrs. Lupin?” she teased

“Absolutely not” he said “Now, tell me— rare?”

"Please don’t make me say it…” she groaned, her cheeks turning pink.

He turned to her and smirked as he held up a piece of the red meat “If you don’t specify, I will grill it well done”

“No!” she cried, throwing her face in her hands “No— _fuck_ — yes, I would like my steak grilled rare, please”

“Not so fucking disgusting, is it?” he laughed, turning and flashing her a wry smile

“Shut up” she said, rolling her eyes

“ _’mark my words, I will never eat my steaks rare!'_ ” he muttered mockingly, imitating her voice with a snobbish tone.

“Shut up!!”

She threw a couch pillow in his direction, giving him a crude gesture with her middle finger as he snickered impishly to himself. A loud tap at the window made them both jump, but once Mia recognized her tawny owl was the culprit behind the noise, she sprung up and shoved the window ajar.

“Lionel!!”

The owl flew in carrying a large velvet sack, seemingly without much effort. She untied the sack from his leg, surprised the owl was able to have carried such a heavy pouch so easily. Lionel hooted softly as he landed onto the sofa, clicking his beak as he looked around. Mia opened the sack, pulling out a bottle of champagne, a small red box, and a note.

> Mr. and Mrs. Lupin
> 
> Hoping you two are enjoying your honeymoon. This champagne is my personal favorite.
> 
> Kingsley
> 
> P.S. the box is from Dora, she was quite excited to send it to you

Mia smiled brilliantly “Kingsley sent us champagne! We should drink it in the Jacuzzi tonight”

“How thoughtful— come put it on ice” 

“Ok hold on, Tonks sent us something too” she opened the small red box, immediately regretting her decision to do so. A foul, nasty odor exploded in front of her with a puff of greenish-brown smoke, wafting throughout the room.

“What the hell is that?!” Remus shouted, covering his nose and mouth with the crook of his elbow.

“She sent us a dungbomb!!”

They ran outside, coughing and sucking in breaths of fresh air. Lionel circled around them, hooting irritably.

“That _bitch!_ ” Mia scoffed “she is probably laughing her head off right now— I’ll send her a howler”

Remus laughed, shaking his head “No— that would only encourage her”

* * *

“Tell me something embarrassing— the most mortifying, embarrassing moment that you can recall”

Remus smirked, his fingertips tracing the crook of her collarbone as Mia straddled his lap, both steaming like lobsters in the Jacuzzi. The sun had set, billions of tiny stars twinkling in the night sky above them. Glasses of champagne sat on the edge of the Jacuzzi, just within arm’s reach.

“Well, there was the one time when I was at Hogwarts— 4th year, and I wanted to ask a girl in my year, Charlene McAdams, to Madam Puddyfoot’s for Valentine’s day—“

“Madam Puddyfoot’s?” Mia snorted, reaching for her glass and taking a small sip “gag me”

“I thought it would impress her—“ he laughed sheepishly “anyways… I went up to her in the Great Hall one day at lunch to ask her, and I was so nervous that when I opened my mouth to speak, I vomited all over her”

Mia and Remus burst into laughter, his cheeks turning a twinge of pink.

“James and Sirius teased me about it for weeks; I thought I was going to die of embarrassment”

“Did you ask her after the fact?”

A bark of laughter escaped him “ _Dear god no_ ” he scoffed “I don’t think I looked her in the eye for two whole years”

Mia giggled, brushing his hair out of his eyes and kissing him softly. He pulled away just an inch, his breath hot against her skin.

“If you had the sole power to change something in the world, what would it be and why?”

“Damn, getting deep are we?” she teased “sole power to change something in the world, no limits?”

“Well, you can’t defy rules of resurrection, because I know you would bring some people back if you could”

He was correct— her first thought would’ve been to reverse the deaths of her father, Sirius and Miranda, but since he excluded that from his hypothetical situation she began to wrack her brain. _Sole power to change something in the world…_ She brushed the hair off Remus’s forehead as she chewed her lip in thought. She would change that he was a werewolf, so he didn’t have to experience the stigma that came with his illness— or would removing such a large part of him change who he was? Maybe he being a werewolf and experiencing prejudice and hardship in his life is what made him so kind, so humble. Would he be overly cocky without his furry little problem? Would he take things like a nice steak dinner or a brand new cloak for granted? It still wasn’t fair though; wasn’t fair that he was forced into a life that was riddled with unemployment and poverty. It wasn’t fair that someone like 19-year-old Jasper Hughes was rotting in Azkaban because of his condition. If she had the sole power to change something about the world, maybe she should change daily life for werewolves. With free access to wolfsbane, and shelters for those that didn’t have a safe place to transform could their monthly transformations easier.

“I would change the stigma around werewolves. I would make it so they had access to wolfsbane for free; the ability to keep employment, create shelters as safe places to transform— make it so being a werewolf was not a big deal at all”

Remus smiled playfully “You would help a few mangy half breeds when you have the power to change anything?”

“I would” Mia said, matter of fact “If I can’t bring back my loved ones, let me make the world a better place for the man I love.”

“Bleeding heart liberal” he muttered cynically, smirking

He poked her in the ribs and tickled her, her squeal echoing in the forest around them. He held her close, placing kisses along her jawline. 

“Maybe I’ll build a place where werewolves can spend the cycle. A secure shelter for those that can’t keep themselves in— I’m sure I’ve got the money thanks to Dad”

“I thought you still wanted to be an Auror?” he asked, raising a brow

“I do” she said “But it could be a pet project. You even said that if a place like that existed, it would make lives better for many werewolves”

A proud smile swept across his face “I did— I think if a place like that existed, it would be a saving grace to many”

She made a mental note to think more on this; maybe she could get a place like this started once this war was all over. Her eyes moved to the scar on his shoulder, her curiosity getting the better of her.

“Do you remember what it was like before you were bitten?”

Remus shifted awkwardly, his face falling at the thought.

“Oh, that was rude of me, I’m sorry—“

“No, no— you are my wife; you are allowed to ask these types of questions”

Mia watched as the gears turned in his brain, thinking about what she asked. Her brain focused on the word wife. _Wife._ She was Remus Lupin’s _wife._ It almost didn’t seem real.

“I don’t think I can remember anything specific from before I became a werewolf, maybe the Christmas before, opening presents and playing with my new toys, and I remember the bite well, but distinct memories from before are hazy”

“I’m sure it was a wonderful Christmas” Mia said softly

“Indeed, I got a toy broomstick that year; I loved that thing— still did, even after the bite”

Her fingertips brushed over his scar on his shoulder, his eyes following her every move.

“Can you tell me about it? That night?”

“You don’t want to hear that—“

He looked at her with a sick expression, chewing on his bottom lip as he thought. She gazed back at him, willing him with her eyes to tell him about that terrible night. He sighed heavily, nodding stiffly.

“He came in through my window. I heard the windowpane break and the drywall crumble as he forced his way inside. He lunged at me, and I felt him sink his teeth in and claw into me. I remember pain, then feeling of blood pouring down my arm, and the feeling that my chest was on fire. From there it was a blur— I think passed out.”

His response was mechanical, almost rehearsed, but there was something cold behind Remus’s eyes as he remembered this traumatic experience. Mia didn’t push him for any more details, this was enough for her. She understood why he didn’t talk about it, it sounded awful. A tear slipped down her cheek; she wiped it quickly, but Remus’s face twisted into an almost angry expression. He gripped her waist tightly, his fingertips pressing into her as his teeth gritted together.

“Don’t look at me like that” he growled

She furrowed her brow “Like what?”

“Like you feel sorry for me— I don’t want pity”

“No, Remus— I don’t” she whispered, grabbing his face gently and stroking his stubbled cheeks with her thumbs. He wouldn’t meet her eyes, self-loathing written all over his expression. “I don’t pity you. I love you— I hurt because you were hurt” she moved one hand to trace the scar again, his grip on her waist tightening even more as her fingertips brushed his skin “Do you dream of that night?”

“Sometimes” he replied stiffly

“Why don’t you wake me when you do? Why don’t you let me comfort you?”

“I’ve been dealing with the memory of that night for thirty something years now” he sighed heavily “I’ve gotten used to it”

Mia bit her lip, looking away from him. “You must think I’m foolish every time I wake up screaming”

“No, not foolish” he said softly, now meeting her eyes

“Weak?”

He smiled slightly, pulling her closer. “No, far from weak”

She wrapped her arms around his neck, her breasts pushing into his chest.

“Then what?”

“Brave.”

“Brave?” she asked incredulously

“You are brave enough to share your feelings, despite it not coming to you easily” he said “I have never very good about talking about my inner demons”

“But you handle yourself so well”

Remus laughed softly “you and me both know I use scotch as my crutch— why do you think I would get so angry when you would turn to a bottle for comfort? I don’t want you falling into the same habit as I do. I saw myself as a monster and a drunk for half my life”

“Fenrir Greyback is the monster” she whispered “not you”

“I could just as easily be a monster” he replied darkly, self-loathing creeping back into his expression “Just as easily chose to injure the innocent and kill as he does”

“No—“she pressed her forehead against his, rolling her hips against him. His breathing hitched as his erection grew between them “You could never be— no man I love is a monster. You are good, you have a pure heart— your condition doesn’t define you”

His jaw clenched and unclenched a couple times as he studied her. His fingertips brushed her mark, his eyes lingering on it for a moment “I never wanted to be the one to leave so much as a scratch on you; I told myself if I ever did, then I was indeed the monster I always feared I was”

“This—“ she pointed to her mark “was done out of love, not out of perverse impulse. I thank you for this mark every day, because I know the moment I come face to face with a real monster again, he cannot touch me.”

Remus kissed her forehead; her eyes fluttering closed as she took a deep breath and rolled her hips against him again.

“You are too good for me, Mia Roswell”

“Excuse me?” She snorted, her eyes flying open as she raised an eyebrow “Last I checked I was Mia Lupin now— or have you grown tired of calling me Mrs. Lupin already?” 

He gave her a wide, wry smile, his posture relaxing as the tension washed away from his face. “My apologies, Mrs. Lupin” he murmured, smirking as he slid into her. She gasped as he filled her, her mark beginning to warm as her desire grew. “I still can’t believe you are my wife, I pinch myself to think that you are _mine._ ”

“I’m yours” she moaned between his thrusts 

“Say that again” he growled, “its music to my ears”

She let out a soft squeak in submission, aching from pleasure “I’m yours!”

His breath was as hot as the Jacuzzi against her neck, his stubble scratching her jaw as he purred into her ear “Again”

“I’m yours Remus Lupin, I’m yours!” she gasped “I’m yours!— forever!— always!— yours!”

* * *

The rest of their honeymoon was filled with dueling in the clearing and hikes through the woods by day, and love sessions by the roaring fireplace and reading books in bed by night. No part of the cabin was unchristen, no part of their bodies left untouched. The idea of returning to work in the morning after a magical few days seemed like unreal; the lovely bubble she and Remus had been living in was cozy, safe, and carefree. Returning to the real world where she would assist in persecuting innocent Muggle-borns, and working for a government with such disgusting views on such seemed almost harder now that she had experienced peace for the first time in a long time. 

Her heart was heavy as she looked around at the now covered furniture, wishing desperately to be able to stay. She liked living in the bubble of isolation with Remus, as if there wasn’t a care in the world, as if they were safe- just the two of them locked up in the secluded cabin.

“I don’t want to go back” she said softly “I want to stay here, just you and me”

Remus sighed, setting his bag down and taking her hand “I wish we could stay” He said heavily “I wish we didn’t have to return to all the misery going on in the world— but we must. We have to go back”

“I know” she said with a wavering voice “I know we do”

Remus squeezed her hand one last time and picked his bag back up. He grabbed a handful of floo powder, ready to throw it into the hearth when he turned back to Mia.

“Ready?”

She glanced around one last time, swallowing and nodding quickly.

“Yeah” she whispered, stepping up to grab a handful of floo powder for herself.

“Alright, you first”

She nodded; throwing the powder into the fire and watching the flames turn emerald green. She stepped inside and spoke her address, turning back to watch the cabin’s living room spin out of sight.

Returning to the flat, Penelope looked different. Her ashy curls more frizzy and untamed, her eyes ringed with dark shadows that screamed she wasn’t sleeping, and her typically pleasant, cool as a cucumber demeanor was replaced with one with an edge; grumpy, short, nervous. Nevertheless, she greeted Mia and Remus with hugs, making polite conversation and asking them how they enjoyed their stay.

Mia watched as Penelope fidgeted with an envelope in her hand, looking nervous to bring up whatever was in its contents. Mia recognized the envelope as one that came from the Ministry; undoubtedly it contained information as to when Penelope would sit for her trial. Mia decided to rip off the bandage, addressing the letter in her hand.

“Is that your trial information?” 

Penelope nodded, handing her the envelope. She pulled the parchment out of the casing, hanging onto every word as she read.

_This notice is to alert the following Defendant:_

_**Penelope Elizabeth Clearwater** _

_Of trial before the Muggle-born Registration Commission to determine blood status. Trial will take place at the Ministry of Magic in London on:_

_**September 2th, 1997** _

_Defendant will need to report at 9:00 am sharp, and surrender wand at time of arrival. In the event of the Defendant evading trial, Aurors will be sent to arrest and detain, and be sentenced to Azkaban Prison without trial._

“Your trial is Tuesday” Mia muttered, handing the paper back to Penelope.

“You’ll have a whole day of trials under your belt at least” Remus offered “You’ll know what you can do to help her”

“I haven’t been able to sleep since the owl came.” Penelope said softly “I’m scared”

Mia swallowed hard, wishing there was something else she could say in this moment. She couldn’t deny her own fear, or her uncertainty of how much their lives would change after the trial. She threw her arms around her best friend’s neck, pulling her into a tight embrace.

“Me too”


	54. chapter 54

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another little dark spot in this chapter, sorry!! just for a moment, though!

Returning to the Ministry was just as daunting as expected. Delphinus seemed stressed to be losing her aide; the stacks of files on Mia’s desk was sky high when she returned, and her timeline to complete her work tasks was extremely short.

Many of the Ministry employees stopped by the Wizengamot Administrative offices to congratulate Mia on her recent nuptials. A silver-haired gentleman from Magical Maintenance even brought her a bouquet of daisies as a wedding gift, telling her they were his late wife’s favorite flower. The gesture brought a tear to her eye, telling him what good taste in florals his wife must’ve had.

When Umbridge stopped by Friday morning, Mia wanted to smack the smug look off her toad-like face. She was delivering information to Mia on how the following week’s court proceedings would go, as well as what her tasks would be through the full two weeks of trials. Mia’s jobs were fairly simple; she would verify the Muggle-borns identity and line them up by order of trial outside the courtroom, and she would scribe the cases as she had done for a few different sessions already. She was also to check for any spare wands, weapons, or anything that security might’ve missed upon their arrival to the Ministry. The entire situation made Mia feel sick, but she nodded politely and took this note of this information.

Friday afternoon was her saving grace, eager to get home to start brainstorming a plan over to successfully get Penelope through her trial. She was finishing up her last stack of copies as a purple paper airplane came zooming in, and into Delphinus’s office.

“Mia!” Delphinus called “Corban wants to see you in his office before you leave for the day”

“Goddamnit” she grumbled under her breath.

She hurried through her stack of copies, dreading whatever bullshit Yaxley wanted to speak with her about. She made her way down the hall, slightly nervous as she approached the oak door with the frosted glass window, golden letters reading _‘Corban Yaxley, Head of Magical Law Enforcement’_. She knocked on the door, his brutal face looking up at her from his desk.

“Mia, sit down” Yaxley said, gesturing to the chair across from his desk “Milk and sugar in your tea?”

“uhm, black is fine”

She wasn’t expecting tea. She slunk down into the chair he pointed to, smoothing her skirt awkwardly as he poured her mug. Yaxley gave her a small smirk as he handed her a tea cup. She fidgeted with it for a moment, feeling nervous before taking a sip. It was quite good, a spicy-sweet blend of orange, clove and cinnamon. She took another few sips, feeling uncomfortable under Yaxley’s brutal stare. She rested the teacup in her lap, clearing her throat softly.

“What can I do for you, Mr. Yaxley?”

“Oh, I just wanted to ask you a few questions” he replied “Are you planning on behaving next week?”

“Only while you are watching, I’m going to try to help my friend Penelope as much as I can from the inside”

Mia clasped a hand over her mouth; did she really just say that? Why on earth would she say what she was actually thinking to Corban Yaxley? She looked down at her cup then up to Yaxley’s brutal, smug face. Her stomach dropped and her hands began to shake when she realized what he had done. _Stupid stupid stupid._ How could she have been so naïve to take a drink of something a Death Eater had given her?

“Veritasserum” she whispered

“I keep a few vials in my desk, comes in handy” he said with a menacing chuckle “Now tell me, where is Harry Potter?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen him in weeks” she replied automatically

“Are you in contact with him?”

“No, he isn’t in contact with anyone.”

Yaxley narrowed his eyes at her, his cold stare piercing into her.

“He wasn’t in attendance at this little wedding of yours?” He asked slowly.

“No”

His brow furrowed “Is he returning to school this term?”

“I don’t believe so”

“mhmm…” Yaxley gave her an appraising look as he seemed to be thinking. Mia looked away from him, wishing desperately that she hadn’t drunk out of her mug. “Where is your mother’s home?”

“I’m not able to say” 

“Yes, the Fidelius charm is quite a powerful enchantment. Tell me then, who is your mother’s Secret Keeper?”

“I don’t know, I wasn’t there when the charm was cast and she never told me who it was.”

Yaxley sighed heavily, shaking her hand and looking at her apathetically “Is there anything you do know?”

“Yes, just not the answers to your stupid questions”

Yaxley let out a bark of laughter “I should backhand you for that cheek, what a way to talk to the Head of Magical Law Enforcement”

Mia glared at him angrily, her mind racing to come up with a plan to get out of Yaxley’s office. Her eyes darted between him and the door, her heart pounding in her ears.

“Where can I find you and the mudblood’s home?”

“I’m not able to say”

“Not your own Secret Keeper— I suppose that was smart on your end” Yaxley said as his eyes narrowed again “Surely you at least know who your Secret Keeper is?”

“Remus Lupin”

“The werewolf husband, of course…”

She needed out of here, now. Mia set her tea down quickly on the desk, standing up to make a dash for the door. Yaxley waved his wand, and she fell back down into her chair, her wrists and ankles now shackled to the chair. She struggled against the binds, Yaxley shifting in front of her.

“Tell me, why is it that you chose the company of a werewolf over a real man?”

“Because I love him; my soul is bonded with his.”

Yaxley gestured to her neck “Your soul is bonded with his because of that beastly mark he gave you”

Mia grit her teeth “My soul bonded to his long before this mark.”

“I see, when was it that you think your ‘soul bonded to his?’”

“At Hogwarts, we were in a relationship while he taught there”

“You little slut, sleeping with your teacher…” Yaxley smirked, leaning back against his desk “The things we learn with veritasserum— you know, my nephew told me you were quite the tease”

“Nephew?”

“Andrew Flint, his mother is my sister” Yaxley smiled; a smile that reminded her of Dolohov, one that shook her to her core. Mia’s breathing hitched, she had no idea. Yaxley kneeled in front of her, placing a hand on her knee. She flinched, leaning away from him as much as she could.

“You like the way the werewolf touches you?”

Mia’s chin quivered “yes.” Her answer came out forced, through gritted teeth as she eyed Yaxley’s hand, her stomach flip flopping as she felt his calloused palm slide slowly up her skirt, across her marred flesh.

“And how is it that you like to be touched, Mia?” 

“He is gentle with me in some ways and rough in others” she whispered, beginning to shake as a few stray tears fell “he touches me like he worships me, like I am the only thing in the world that matters”

“I am being gentle with you— you like this?”

His other hand slid up her skirt, his fingers curling around the waistband of her panties. She inhaled sharply, shaking her head as now tears were streaming down her face as he yanked them down, letting them dangle around her shackled ankles.

“No!— I don’t!”

“I think the veritasserum is wearing off, because I think this is _exactly_ what you like, you little skank”

“Mr. Yaxley, _please…_ ”

Mia trembled as his hand moved up her skirt again, dangerously close to an area she did not want him near. She squeezed her eyes shut and flexed her hands, the shackles around her wrists and ankles releasing. She jumped up, shoving Yaxley back as she leaped for his office door. Her hand was on the doorknob when Yaxley flicked his wand, and she froze in place.

“Interesting…” he said, studying her intently as he walked around her, stalking her like a shark stalks its prey “How did you manage to do that?”

“I can do some wandless magic” she said quietly

“I see that— can you do anything else interesting?”

“I am an animagus” she replied, wincing as she said it

He looked at her intently “I don’t believe I saw you on the registry” he replied, amused

She fought hard not to speak, the words busting at the seams as the veritasserum forced her to be honest “I’m— not— r- r— registered” she choked through her clenched jaw, immediately cursing herself for not being able to fight the potion.

“What form do you take?”

She clenched her jaw as tight as she could, fighting the effects of the veritasserum. Her face was turning red as she struggled, it was almost painful. She was choking on the words, the sentence fighting every cell in her body to escape.

“Don’t fight the potion, Mia” Yaxley said dangerously “It will only hurt if you resist—now answer my question!”

“A— white— wolf”

“Good to know” he said, a sickening smile creeping across his face “we’ll keep that detail to ourselves for now. Now, I trust this conversation will stay between us and that you’ll behave at the trials next week?”

“Yes” she grumbled

“Yes, _Mr. Yaxley_ ” he corrected

She hated Yaxley. He held all the power in the palm of his hand, dandling it in front of her like a carrot.

“Yes, Mr. Yaxley”

“Good girl— and if you don’t, I won’t be so gentle with you next time” He stepped close to her, his hand brushing against the front of her blouse and up to her jaw line. He moved her blouse over so he could study her mark, his breath against her skin giving her uncomfortable goosebumps “So beautiful, such a shame…”

She gritted her teeth as he flicked his wand, releasing her. Mia threw the door open and dashed out of Yaxley’s office to the women’s restroom, throwing herself inside a stall and hurling the entire contents of her stomach into the toilet.

* * *

Her skin was pink as she scrubbed and scrubbed, scrubbing Corban Yaxley’s touch off of her skin. Remus was out when she arrived home, thankful to not have to explain her tear soaked face and jumpy demeanor to him. She felt dirty, disgusting, the need to keep scrubbing coursed through her as the washcloth was now beginning to hurt her skin. She let out a frustrated growl, throwing her washcloth onto the shower floor. It hit the floor with a loud smack; she turned the water up to high heat, hoping to burn every inch of unclean flesh off of her body. She couldn’t get the feeling of his hands off of her, she felt sick to think of her panties lying in the middle of his office— would he use that against her? Keep them as a souvenir and say she came onto him? That she took her undergarment off willingly, in an attempt to seduce him? That it was her fault, she shouldn’t’ve worn a skirt and heels to work that day?

The front door slammed shut, making her jump. “Mia? You home?” she heard Remus call from the living room.

“Yeah, in the shower, be out in a second!”

She turned the water off and stepped out, wrapping herself in a fluffy towel. She looked in the mirror, taking a deep breath. She stepped out into the bedroom and dried herself vigorously. She balled her towel up and threw it in the hamper, jumping when she felt Remus’s hands slide around her hips, his warm breath on her neck as he nuzzled his head against her.

“I missed you today” he whispered “I wish you would’ve waited for me to take a shower…”

Usually his lips on her neck sent shivers through her body, but right now, she just didn’t want to be touched. She shrugged, rolling her shoulders in an attempt to get him to stop.

“Remus please— I’m not in the mood”

“Then let’s get you in the mood” he purred

His kisses were overwhelming, his touch made her skin crawl. She rolled her shoulders again, his body not responding to her gentle shoves and posture shifts.

“Not right now, I had a hard day at work—“ 

“This will help you destress…”

He cupped the swell of her breasts as he pinned her hips against the dresser. Any other day she would’ve bent over and let him take her like this, but today, she couldn’t handle it. A lump began to form in her throat, panic set in as the edges of her vision grew fuzzy.

“REMUS, STOP!” she shouted angrily

He flinched, his hands retreating from her body as he stepped away from her. He looked thoroughly confused as he held his hands up, appraising her.

“What’s wrong?”

“I told you I wasn’t in the mood!” she snapped

He shrugged. “You are always in the mood, all I have to do is look in your direction and you throw yourself at me” 

Her anger rose, she could transform into the white wolf and rip his throat out for that statement. “Fuck you!” she scoffed

“It’s not a bad thing!” he cried, chuckling awkwardly “You can throw yourself at me anytime you like, I like it! Trust me!”

All the emotions bubbling underneath the surface came to a head as she rubbed her face furiously, letting out a frustrated growl. His expression softened, his posture stooped as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you stressed about Penelope’s trial?”

_Yes and I was also half molested by my pervert boss who dosed me with veritasserum to have me reveal my deep dark secrets._ She dug her fingernails into her palm as she fought back stinging tears behind her eyes 

“yeah, the trial has me nervous”

Why did she lie? Remus wouldn’t blame her for what happened, but part of her felt shameful, dirty that Yaxley put his hands on her. She didn’t want to tell anyone, she didn’t want to speak of it ever. She wanted to forget it happened.

“You hungry? I can make you something”

“No I’m not hungry”

He pursed his lips at her, dissatisfied by this answer but chose not to fight. There was a pregnant pause between them as Remus stared at Mia, and Mia stared at the floor.

“Can I have a minute alone?” she asked softly

“Alright… I’ll be in the living room; the cooking network has an episode on about crème brulee, if you’d like to join me”

“Maybe in a bit” she said, sinking down on the floor with her back against the mattress.

He stood and looked at her for a moment before sighing and exited the room. When he was gone, she pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face in her arms, crying as quietly as she could. She was indeed scared for Penelope’s trial in the morning, amongst her fears of the impending war. She reached under her bed and felt around, her fingers curling around a bottle of rum she had stashed months ago. She opened it and took a hearty swig, the liquid burning her throat as it went down. Guilt flushed over her as she took another swig, remembering her promise to not use alcohol as her secret coping mechanism. In this moment, her emotions won the internal battle, curling up on her side and clutching the gin bottle to her chest.

* * *

“Alright, so they will take your wand...”

Mia, Remus and Penelope were attempting to brainstorm ways for Penelope to get through her trial. Things were looking quite grim, the possibility of getting out without a conviction seemed slim to none.

“Once you appear before the courts, if you’re found guilty of stealing magic they will take you to Azkaban immediately”

“I’m doomed!” Penelope cried, throwing her face into her hands “What am I going to do?”

“They are watching me to make sure that I don’t help you” Mia said “which basically means they will be watching to make sure I don’t return your wand to you”

“What the hell would a wand even help me with, anyway?” Penelope grumbled

“It would help you blast people apart as you ran through the Ministry to escape” Remus said

Penelope ran her hands through her hair obsessively, frizzing her curls “They are going to take me to Azkaban, aren’t they? I am going to prison”

“I’m not going to let that happen…” Mia began

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GOING TO DO, HUH?” Penelope shouted “What the hell could you _possibly_ do at this point?”

“I don’t know, but—“

“But _nothing_ , Mia! I’m going to Azkaban to rot in a filthy cell, it’s inevitable. I should’ve skipped town when I had the chance, but you two—“ She gestured to Remus and Mia angrily “—convinced me to just fill it out, we’d come up with a plan!” Penelope’s face was turning purple with rage and panic “But the time is here and now, and were all just standing around with our heads up our asses!”

“We still have a few days, there’s still time to come up with a plan…”

“Fuck your plans, and fuck you both.” She growled, rising from the table and stomping off into her room, she slammed the door shut, the lock plinking softly. Not that a simple muggle door lock would keep a witch or wizard from entering, but it was the concept behind locking the door.

“Remus, what are we going to do?” Mia whispered

“We need to get a wand to her” he said “that will be the only thing to help her”

Mia sat back, how on earth was she going to get Penelope back her wand with Yaxley watching her every move? She wracked her brain over and over, until a lightbulb went off.

“Bobby pin” she whispered

“What?” Remus asked, furrowing his brow

“I can transfigure wands into bobby pins— I can slip my wand into her hair, they’ll never know it’s my wand I’m giving her, I can play it off as if I am checking her hair for any hidden tricks. With a wave of my hand, I can turn it back, and she’ll be armed”

Remus sat back and studied Mia as he thought this idea through “Its brilliant”

“She can hide out here; where the Fidelius charm will keep her concealed” Mia said “Can you help her brush up on her dueling? She’ll need to be in tip top shape”

Remus smiled, “I can do that— think you can coax her out of her room?”

“Give her a few minutes by herself” Mia sighed “Eric is supposed to come over this afternoon, he should be able to get her out”

* * *

“Your wand is a piece of _shit_ ” Penelope growled “It doesn’t work”

“Maybe you’re not focusing?” Mia offered “Just take a deep breath and calm down.”

“I’m focusing just fine, thank you! Your wand doesn’t work!”

Penelope had been uncharacteristically on edge ever since receiving her trial notice, and today was no exception. After her outburst earlier, Eric came over with pizza, ice cream and wine, but none of Penelope’s favorite foods had calmed her nerves.

“My wand is fine—“ Mia snapped “You getting all worked up…”

“Mia, if you tell me to calm down _one more time…_ ”

“HEY! Ladies, put the claws away—” Eric hollered, before turning to Remus “Why won’t the wand work for her? They are not all the same?”

“Wands are loyal to their owner, however, typically they can be used by another— let me try, Penelope” Remus offered.

He took Mia’s wand and tried to cast a few spells, but had no luck. He held her wand close to his face, inspecting it for damage.

“Are you sure your wand isn’t broken?”

“No, it works fine for me!”

She grabbed her wand and performed a few simple spells with ease, eliciting a groan from Penelope. Remus furrowed his brow, looking at her wand intently.

“What wood is your wand?” he asked “Aspen?”

“No, Acacia”

Remus let out a sigh, realization splashing across his face.

“Of course, no wonder…”

“No wonder what?” Mia asked

“You’re the only witch I know with an Acacia wood wand” Penelope said “Why would that make a difference?”

“Acacia wood is very temperamental. Typically that type of wand will only perform for the witch or wizard it is loyal to, and even at that, the wand cannot be used to its full potential unless wielded by a very talented individual.”

“And when did you study wandlore…?” Mia asked, crinkling her nose

“I read a lot of books during my stints of unemployment” he said simply “So in layman’s terms, a pain in the ass wand for a pain in the ass witch”

He smirked, resulting in a playful slap on the shoulder followed by an eye roll.

“Alright so she needs someone else’s wand” Mia said, a statement not a question

“Why can’t you just keep hers, and then give it back?” Eric asked

“She has to surrender her wand upon her arrival, I won’t have access to it and I know Yaxley will be keeping it under guard” Mia said

“My wand is cypress, you can use mine” Remus offered

“No—“ Mia interjected “you are not staying home unarmed. My mum might have an extra wand lying around, hold on—”

She trotted over to the phone, dialing her mother’s number. She was anxious as she listened to the ring tone, bouncing on her heels.

"Hello?”

“Mum? It’s Mia”

“Hey sweetheart! How are you?”

“Fine fine, hey— do you have any spare wands?”

“I have your grandmother’s wand… why?”

“I need to borrow it— what wood is it made of?”

“Uh… Holly, I think”

“Excellent! I’ll be there in 15 seconds”

Mia slammed the phone on the receiver and apparated with a crack, landing in the middle of Susan’s living room. She began inspecting the bookcases for the wand, expecting her mother to have kept it on display.

“Mum?? Where is it?” she called, 

“Right here!” Susan came trotting down the stairs, wand case in hand “Right here, what do you need it for?”

“I just need to borrow it” she said, yanking the wand out of her hand “thanks!!”

“Don’t break or lose that!” she hollered, her words lost in the pop of apparition.

Mia popped back into the living room, taking the wand out of its case and handing it to Penelope.

“Holly— should work”

Penelope cast a few spells beautifully with her grandmother’s wand, almost as easily as if she were using her own wand.

“Excellent. I’ll wear this wand in my hair, and slip it to you. I’ll transfigure it back once it’s time for you to fight.”

Penelope smiled weakly, giving her an uncertain nod.

“Well now that the wand works” Remus clasped his hands together “Let’s get working on our dueling spells, shall we?"

* * *

Monday comes around, along with a wave of stress. Remus, Penelope and Mia spent the entire weekend brushing up on Penelope’s dueling skills. It was also good for Mia, for the few times she sparred with Penelope to give Remus a break she was able to practice her spells wandless.

As she was pouring a cup of coffee, her anxiety felt like a rising tide within her. Her eyes kept flickering to the whisky bottle pushed back against the backsplash, the honey colored liquid calling out to her. Just a splash in her coffee would take the edge off. She knew she shouldn’t, but she slowly reached for the bottle anyway. She thought she was being swift, but when she felt Remus’s tall frame pin her against the cabinet and his bruising grip on her outstretched hand, she winced. _Busted._

“What are you doing” he said, a statement, not a question.

“I just need something to get me through today” she whispered.

“Not that.” He replied curtly “I thought we agreed you weren’t doing this anymore”

“We did” she whispered, even softer as her chin began to tremble.

“Yet you are reaching for a whisky bottle to spike your coffee”

Mia didn’t answer; he had caught her red handed. She thought his back was turned and that she could sneak a splash in unnoticed. She knew he had a right to be upset, she did promise she wouldn’t do this anymore

“You have bottles hidden in this flat, don’t you?” he growled dangerously “Am I going to be upset when I comb through this place after you leave?”

“No” she squeaked

“Are you lying to me?”

His tone was much angrier than she had anticipated, her voice low, gravelly and very unlike him. His grip on her wrist was so tight, her hand was starting to loose feeling.

“Remus, you’re hurting me”

It took him a second to register what she was saying before he released her, stepping away from her quickly, she spun to look at him, his blue eyes burning furiously as they pierced into her.

“Do not lie to me” he said sharply “where is your stash?”

“I don’t have a stash” she lied, struggling to keep eye contact.

She was thankful when Penelope came out of her bedroom, breaking their tension and keeping Remus distracted so Mia could slip out the front door without another word.

* * *

The first day of trials was as terrible as she assumed they would be. Muggle-born witches and wizards crying, sobbing for mercy, all of which were sent to Azkaban while Dolores Umbridge sat back, pleased with herself. Mia hated every minute of it; hated hearing the cries for the innocent’s children to not be left motherless or fatherless, Yaxley’s uncomfortable stare or chilling touch when he would place a hand on the back of her neck— reminding her not to pull any funny business. She hated watching Umbridge’s stupid cat patronus walk up and down the courtroom bench, despite the silver animal keeping the effects of the dementors off them.

Once the trials were over for the day, she was tasked with bringing the stack of files to Delphinus’s office, copying the files, and then filing them away. Mia wished Delphinus would’ve been in her office when she stopped by, wishing for a familiar, safe face. Had someone told her Delphinus Gamal’s presence would comfort her 6 months ago when she started her internship, Mia would’ve laughed in their face.

As she copied the first day trial files, a purple paper airplane zoomed in, landing on top of her desk. Mia unfolded the paper airplane carefully, rolling her eyes to see Yaxley’s scrawls across the parchment.

_Bring stack of memos to me from on top of my desk, pronto._

She crumpled up the paper and tossed it into the wastebasket, rolling her eyes and cursing under her breath. She copied and sorted the rest of the files quickly, then set out for Yaxley’s office. She walked inside, scoffing at the chair situated across from his desk, serving as a reminder to what had happened in her just a few days before. She grabbed the stack of papers from the middle of his desk and turned to leave when an idea popped into her head. She snuck a look down the hallway to double check that the brutal faced wizard was not nearby, then pulled out her wand, and pointed it at the ceiling of his office. After muttering a few incantations, Rain began to fall, soaking his desk and all the belongings inside. Mia giggled as she tucked her wand away, walking with a spring in her step down the hallway— and feeling quite pleased with herself. 

* * *

“I made Yaxley’s office rain!” Mia cried as she bustled in the front door, kicking her heels off “I’d like to see him stop that storm I set loose!”

Her heart dropped when she turned around and saw Remus sitting at the dining room table, 6 bottles of booze in front of him. _He missed one. He missed the vodka underneath the couch._

“You lied to me” he said cooly.

“Remus—“

“No.” He said firmly “You do not lie to me. I don’t know when you started lying, but you need to stop.”

She opened and closed her mouth a couple times before sighing admitting defeat. She hunched her shoulders and sunk down into a dining room chair, staring at the floor.

“Yes, I lied to you” she whispered

He let out a frustrated sigh “I am angry because I love you” he said “I am not the bad guy here”

Her chin began to quiver as tears stung behind her eyes. Shame flooded through her, she knew shouldn’t’ve lied.

“I know”

“You are supposed to talk about your feelings, not drink them away” he said “Be honest, how long have you been drinking in secret again?”

“Just this weekend”

He raised an eyebrow “you promise?”

She nodded, a few tears slipping down her cheek.

“Is this all of it? Or do you have more hidden?” he asked, gesturing to the bottles in front of him.

She nodded, wiping her face furiously as she stood, walking to the couch and pointing. It was taking everything she had not to burst into tears, so she simply pointed and sunk down on the couch, wrapping her arms around herself. Remus reached under the couch and pulled the small bottle of vodka out, joining it with the other bottles on the table.

“That’s it?” he asked

She let out a confirming sob, burying her face into her hands.

“Come here” he said softly, stretching his arms to her.

He sat down on the couch, allowing her to crawl into his lap. She nuzzled herself against his chest as he pulled her into a tight embrace and stroked her waist-length dark hair, gently shushing her. She sobbed big fat ugly tears, crying so hard her face was red and patchy. All her emotions hit the surface— crying for disappointing him, crying over her fears for Penelope, crying over her fears for herself.

“I love you” he whispered “we’re going to get through tomorrow, it’s alright.”

“I’m sorry” she choked “I’m sorry about the booze”

“shhh” he crooned softly “just take a deep breath.”

She sobbed against him for nearly an hour, crying out all her frustration, her fears, her anxiety. She knew she should tell him about her conversation with Yaxley, but when she opened her mouth to speak, shame washed over her so intensely that she just began to sob harder, unable to speak. Later, when they were calmed down and snuggled on the couch with a movie on, she couldn’t bring herself to tell him. She didn’t know why, why all of a sudden she was reverting back to the old her and clamming up when it came time to talk things out. Even while she lay with her head on his chest, listening to his strong heartbeat thump slowly in his chest, she couldn’t bring herself to tell him.

She struggled to fall asleep, her anxiety causing her to shift and turn, unable to find a comfortable spot. Her mind wouldn’t stop racing with the events that would occur tomorrow; she was certain no matter the outcome of Penelope’s trial, life as she knew it was surely about to change.


	55. chapter 55

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! This chapter was a doozy to write. There is a lot going on, and it's pretty long. Regardless, hope you enjoy!

Penelope cried all morning, sobbing into her plate of French toast until her eyes nearly swelled shut. Remus and Mia had tried everything to console her—Remus even offered to attend her trial for support, but the idea was immediately shut down by both girls. Sending a werewolf into the Ministry, especially when his freedom had already been threatened by the Head of Magical Law Enforcement, didn’t seem like a good idea to either of them.

Mia’s anxiety was through the roof, but with Penelope falling apart before her, she felt she had to put on the brave face between the two of them. Her French toast slid down her throat like glass, her stomach bubbling irritably as she forced herself to choke down at least some of breakfast to keep Remus from having a fit. She wished desperately for a spike in her coffee— something to take the edge off the elephant sitting on her chest. _Alcohol is not a coping mechanism_ she reminded herself _you don’t need it._

After breakfast, Mia and Penelope walked to the Ministry together, arms linked and silent the entire journey. Penelope was dressed nice, but not overly done up— plain dress robes of dark blue and her ashy curls smoothed back in a neat chignon. Their heels clacked against the sidewalk; Mia had to take extra steps to keep up with Penelope’s long strides. Tonks met them half way, linking onto Penelope’s other arm and joining them in their silent procession. Rather than take the employee toilets, they entered the Ministry through the visitor’s entrance, the three of them cramming into the tight abandoned telephone box. Tonks dialed 6-2-4-4-2 on the rotary phone, a pleasant female operator’s voice speaking to them not through the receiver, but as if she were standing in the booth with them.

_“Welcome to the Ministry of Magic, please state your names and business”_

“Nymphadora Tonks, Auror and Amelia Lupin, Wizengamot Administrative Services escorting Penelope Clearwater for her court appearance”

“Thank you; please display your badges in a place where visible”

The phone spit out a visitors badge for Penelope before it lowered them below ground. Tonks handed Penelope her badge, receiving it with shaking hands. They stood in silence until they arrived at the Atrium, the phone elevator chiming softly when it came to a halt.

“I need to get to my desk— let me know how it goes?” Tonks gave Penelope a warm hug “it’s going to be alright, ok?”

“You need to go check in at that desk—“Mia pointed to a small desk positioned at the far end of the atrium as Tonks made her way to the lifts “That’s Travers. He will take your wand, send you through a scanner looking for more magical objects, and then have someone escort you down to the courts. I’ll see you down there.”

“Mia—“Penelope squeaked

“Penny, it’s alright” Mia said, her eyes locking with dark-haired, bearded Travers “You need to go now— He is looking at us”

“Why does that matter—“

“Travers is a Death Eater!” Mia hissed “He is watching us because he knows who _I_ am. Go— I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

Penelope bit her lip “Alright”

She walked away, heading towards Travers as he and Mia glared at each other. Mia forced herself to break their stare, scurrying off towards the lifts. Her stomach was in her throat; she reached up into her hair and felt the bobby pin she had tucked behind her ear— her grandmother’s holly wand was concealed perfectly. All she had to do was get the bobby pin from her hair and into Penelope’s without Yaxley or Umbridge seeing. Easier said than done, when she knew Yaxley was hardly going to let her out of his sight.

She exited the lift and was hit by a bone chilling frost, the feeling of dread flooding through her as she heard her father screaming faintly in the back of her mind. She had experienced this same scenario the day previous, but something about today seemed worse. She felt more dreadful, more hopeless as she stepped down the hall, fearful of walking past the ominous creatures skirting around her. She stepped into the courtroom, met by Yaxley, standing just inside the room clutching a purple interdepartmental memo.

“Travers just sent me a memo” Yaxley said, looking up at her with his cold, brutal stare “You walked the mudblood into the Ministry today?”

“He certainly didn’t waste any time” Mia muttered contemptuously “Of course I did— I wasn’t going to send her into this bullshit alone”

Yaxley whipped his wand out and advanced on her. Before she could blink, a calloused hand gripped her jaw as his wand tip pushed into her throat. _“You watch yourself, Mia Roswell!”_ He spoke dangerously “The fate of your little friend rests in my and Dolores’s hands, and yet you _still_ choose to give me cheek”

“It’s Mia Lupin, now” She glared at him, wanting desperately to spit in his face and tell him exactly what she thought of him, but refrained. “—Mr. Yaxley” she added with false politeness, after a pause.

She stood up straighter, as if giving herself an extra quarter-inch of height would make her more intimidating. It didn’t— Yaxley towered over her still, raising his brow ever so slightly as his harsh eyes bore into her. “The mudblood passed through the magical objects scan just fine, but something tells me you didn’t learn much from our conversation last week.”

“She passed her scan” Mia said with a shrug “She showed up for trial. At this point, Mr. Yaxley, She and I have cooperated fully.”

He paused for a moment, narrowing his eyes “Need I remind you what will happen if you don’t behave today?”

Mia instinctively rubbed her neck as she imagined dementors prying Remus’s face back and performing their dreaded kiss inside a filthy cell in Azkaban. She felt a slight bit of defeat, but she kept her face firm, not wanting him to see her falter.

“No, Mr. Yaxley, there is no need to remind me” she said quietly.

“Good girl— Travers recommended Mafalda Hopkirk record keep today, go send a memo for her to join us.”

“If Mafalda is scribing, then what am I here for?” Mia asked “I thought the whole point of me working on this bull—“ she stopped when she saw Yaxley’s eyes flash. She took a breath and rephrased her question. “I thought _I_ was here to scribe.”

“And you will, for all the other court dates that you don’t have a vested interest in. I do not trust that you won’t record inaccurate information for Miss Clearwater.” 

“Then what am I doing here _today?_ ” She asked, trying but failing to keep sass out of her tone. “Wouldn’t I be more of use to Delphin—“

“You are here—” Yaxley squared his body threateningly “—because we ordered it so.” He glared at her intensely “You will sit next to me and observe, _silently._ Go send for Mafalda and then find Dolores— last I heard she was on level one.”

Mia gritted her teeth and nodded. She spun on her heels and walked out of the courtroom, a shiver tracing down her spine as a dementor floated next to her. Her mind raced; she was being watched from all angles. The might of the Ministry seemed to be closing in around her, any plan or idea that she had to help Penelope seemingly childish in this moment.

As she stood waiting for the lifts just minutes later, Mia wrapped her arms around herself protectively and stood off to the side, uncomfortable to hear the Minister of Magic Pius Thicknesse and Umbridge discussing court proceedings with the upmost disrespect for Muggle-borns. She had always hated the term mudblood, and to hear these people use the term with such casualty made her blood boil. The lift clanged in front of them, the golden gate springing open to reveal Mafalda Hopkirk and Albert Runcorn.

“Ah, Mafalda— Travers sent you? You received Amelia’s memo?”

“Yes!” Mafalda squeaked softly

“Good, you will do perfectly well—” Umbridge turned her attention to Thicknesse, “That’s that problem solved, Minister; if Mafalda can be spared for record keeping, we should be able to start straight away”

Umbridge sent a slight, irritable glance at Mia before she consulted her clipboard. By her demeanor, it seemed that Mia getting pulled off scribing was not at Umbridge’s request. 

“Ten people today— and one of them the wife of a Ministry employee; Tut tut— even here, in the heart of the Ministry!”

They stepped into the lift. Mia was crammed towards the back, clumsily bumping against Mafalda’s shoulders. She gave the witch a sheepish look, mouthing ‘sorry’ before directing her eyes at the floor. Mafalda simply squeaked in acceptance of her apology, looking uncomfortable to the point of almost sick.

“We’ll go straight down, Mafalda. Everything you need is already in the courtroom— if you have any questions, Amelia can answer them for you—“ Umbridge paused and looked over at tall, robust Albert Runcorn “good morning Albert, aren’t you getting out?”

“Oh, uh, yes” Albert Runcorn’s deep voice answered. “Of course”

The wizard stepped out, and the lift’s golden gates slammed shut, and then began to lower them down. The lift stopped at the basement courtrooms, the depressing chill hitting Mia as hard as it did when she met with Yaxley in the courtrooms just a few minutes earlier. The Muggle-borns were lined up down the hall to the courtrooms, all looking terrified; shaking and shivering as they sat on hard wooden benches.

“Amelia, be a dear and go line up the Mudbloods in order?” Umbridge said sweetly. “Make sure everyone is here?”

She swallowed hard “Yes ma’am, I will go check” she said quietly, accepting the clipboard.

She began at the beginning of the line, moving a few people into a different order as she confirmed the names of the defendants. She felt Penelope’s eyes on her as she made her way down the line, Penelope somewhat in the middle of the ten people awaiting trial. She reached the woman just before Penelope, trying hard to focus and maintain a calm appearance as her friend’s stare bore into her. The shaking, teary-eyed woman had her dark hair pulled tightly into a bun, and was dressed in plain robes. She had a kind face, despite the fearful look in her eyes.

“Mary Cattermole?” Mia asked, looking at the woman as kindly as she could.

“Y—yes” the woman choked. “M—my husband works for Magical Maintenance, Reg Cattermole? Do you know if he is on his way? He said h—he would be here…”

“I’m not sure, Mrs. Cattermole” Mia said with a sympathetic expression “I’m sure he will be here soon”

Mrs. Cattermole nodded stiffly as Mia stepped to Penelope, who looked at Mia with the most terrified expression she had ever seen on her friend.

“Penelope Clearwater?”

“Really?” Penelope asked softly, scrunching her nose slightly.

“ _Penelope Clearwater?_ ” Mia repeated, a little more forceful.

Mia flashed her eyes at her, willing Penelope just to play along and answer her. She didn’t seem to catch on; Penelope blinked at her for a moment before answering slowly. 

“Obviously…”

“Thank you” Mia nodded quickly, purposely shifting her weight to trip and bump into Penelope, sliding the bobby pin into her hair. Her chignon was the perfect hairstyle to conceal the bobby pin fully; Mia tucked it deep within the bun, praying it wouldn’t accidentally slip out between now and when she would need to transfigure it back. “Sorry about that, Miss Clearwater”

“Mia—“ Penelope squeaked softly, looking on the verge of tears. “I’m scared…”

Mia gritted her teeth and refused to look at her as she stepped away and moved to the next person in line, regretting she couldn’t sit and comfort her friend through this. Another shiver of dread accompanied by soft screaming in her mind cut through her as a dementor skirted past them. She gripped the clipboard to keep her hands from shaking as she looked over her shoulder; she felt immense relief to see that Yaxley had not witnessed her clumsily ‘stumble’ into Penelope just a moment earlier. She took another few minutes verifying the defendants; all ten were present. She walked back into the courtrooms, handing the clipboard back to Umbridge.

“All the Muggle-borns are present, Dolores”

“Excellent, thank you” Umbridge nodded

“mhmm” Mia hummed flatly, turning to take her seat on the bench.

“Oh, Amelia?” Umbridge called, stopping her. Mia felt Yaxley’s eyes on her as she turned back to face Umbridge “Where is your wand?”

“Right here” Smirking, she pulled her acacia wand out of the front of her robes, holding it up to show Umbridge and ignoring Yaxley’s burning stare. “Where else would it be?”

Umbridge smiled sweetly, but her smile was forced. “Just wondering”

The second day of Muggle-born trials proved to be just as horrific as the first. All the Muggle-borns today so far had been found guilty of ‘stealing magic’, and sent off to Azkaban. As if the screams and sobs of the innocent begging for mercy weren’t enough, Yaxley felt the need to keep one of his calloused hands on Mia’s thigh the entire time, gripping if she shifted her weight or coughed. She knew this was his reminder of her that he was watching her, ensuring she stayed silent and behaved— by his standards.

“Look him up! My father is a wizard! He’s a wizard, I tell you— you have to believe me!— get your hands off me! _Get your hands off me!_ ”

“If you resist, you will be subject to the dementor’s kiss” Umbridge said smugly “Mary Cattermole!” 

Mia bit her lip and shifted uneasily, the man’s screams setting her teeth on edge. Yaxley’s hand tightened, his cold stare seemingly burning into her. Mia refused to look at him, leaning her body weight to one side as if to put as much space between them as possible. She focused on the defendant chair in front of them, her stomach flip-flopping when she realized there was only one Muggle-born until it was Penelope’s turn to sit before the court. She watched helplessly as Mrs. Cattermole slinked into the courtroom, shaking and looking absolutely petrified.

“Please, sit down” Umbridge said, pointing to the chair in front of them. The woman sat down, shackles springing up out of thin air and containing her to the chair. Dementors were posted in the corners of the room, floating ominously, waiting for direction. Mrs. Cattermole tugged at the shackles for a moment, looking panicked to be contained so brutally. “You are Mary Elizabeth Cattermole?”

“Y-yes”

“Married to Reginald Cattermole of the Magical Maintenance department?”

Mrs. Cattermole began to shake so hard the chair rattled underneath her “I don’t know where he is, he was supposed to meet me…”

“Mother to Maisie, Ellie and Alfred Cattermole?”

Her shaky voice was overcome with sobs “they’re f-frightened; they think I might not c-come home”

“Spare us!” Yaxley growled “the brats of mudbloods do not stir our sympathies”

Mia wanted nothing more than to drive a quill through Yaxley’s eyeball in this moment. Mafalda knocked over her bottle of ink with a slight squeal, causing Mia to flinch. Yaxley’s hand tightened on her thigh once more, his fingertips mercilessly bruising her.

“A wand was taken from you upon your arrival, 8 ¾ inches; cherry with unicorn hair” Umbridge continued “Where did you acquire this wand?”

“I b-bought it, from Ollivander’s when I was 11” Mrs. Cattermole squeaked “It c-chose me!”

Umbridge laughed a soft girlish laugh, that annoying laugh that made Mia wish she could hex her right here and now. Umbridge leaned forward, glaring at Mrs. Cattermole with her dark beady eyes. “Wands only choose witches and wizards—“ a glint of a large gold locket swinging forward caught Mia’s eye as Umbridge leaned further, pointing a stubby finger at Mrs. Cattermole “ _you_ are not a witch.”

“That’s pretty, Dolores” Mafalda complimented, gesturing to Umbridge’s bosom.

“ _What?_ — Oh— yes, it’s a family heirloom” Umbridge said “the S stands for Selwyn— I am related to the Selwyn’s, one of the last true pureblood families out there.”

_“Stupefy!”_

The deep voice that came from nowhere made Mia jump nearly to the ceiling. Umbridge fell forward, cracking her forehead against the bench. She looked over, and right behind Mafalda was a disembodied hand, floating and holding a wand pointed directly at her and Yaxley.

“What the…” she whispered as Yaxley drew his wand. The disembodied hand was quicker; the deep voice bellowed the stunning spell incantation once more as a jet of red smacked Yaxley square in the chest. Mia watched the brutal faced wizard slump over, crumpling into a heap on the floor next to her. The disembodied hand was now revealed to be attached to the body of Albert Runcorn. Mia drew her wand, pointing it square at Runcorn’s chest.

“Mia, it’s me!” He boomed, holding his hands up “Harry! We used polyjuice!”

“Wait— _Harry??_ ” She asked incredulously, narrowing her eyes “What the— is that _Hermione_?!?”

“Harry!—“Hermione cried shrilly “Mrs. Cattermole!”

The dementors were swooping in around the shackled, helpless witch. A scabby, scaly hand grasped her chin, pulling her face upwards as another was getting ready to lower its hood, ready to suck out her soul.

“ _Expecto patronum!_ ” Harry called; a silver stag erupted from his wand and cantered around the room, driving the dementors back and out of the room. “We need to go, now! How do I get rid of these chains?”

Mia pointed her wand at the shackles around Mrs. Cattermole. “ _Relashio!_ ”

The chains broke apart and Harry helped the witch stand “Hermione, come on!”

“Hold on!— I need to duplicate this, so Umbridge doesn’t realize its missing when she wakes!”

“You broke in here for an ugly old locket?” Mia asked incredulously “ _Seriously?_ ”

“Never mind!” Hermione squeaked “I can’t focus with you talking!—“

“Here, I can do it—“

Mia grabbed the locket out of Hermione’s hand and waved her wand, instantly creating a virtually identical copy of the locket. Hermione fastened it back onto Umbridge’s neck with shaking hands.

“How are we supposed to get out of here with all these dementors?” Hermione asked.

“Patronuses” he said “as many as we can get— Mia, cast yours.”

Mia nodded, flicking her wand and sending her shimmering, brilliant wolf leaping after Harry’s stag.

“Ok, Hermione, yours now” Harry said with a nod

“Expecto patronum!” Hermione cried, nothing happening “expect— expecto patronum!”

“It’s the only spell she has trouble with” Harry shrugged to Mia.

Finally after a couple tries, a silver otter burst from her wand, swimming through the air towards the wolf and stag. Harry grabbed Mrs. Cattermole’s arm as he pointed to the door,

“We need to go, come on!”

They followed the patronuses out of the courtroom and into the hallway. Penelope shrieked, running to Mia and embracing her tightly.

“Mia, what the hell is going on? I heard commotion—“

“You won’t be sitting for your trial—” Mia said quickly, looking over her shoulder “I need you to cast a patronus”

Mia waved her hand, and the bobby pin tucked into Penelope’s chignon grew into the long holly wand. She drew it from her hair, gripping it with shaking hands.

“I— I haven’t been able to before” Penelope said nervously “what’s going on? What’s happening?”

“I’ll explain later, just cast your patronus!”

“You all can follow the patronuses out to the atrium, you’ll be able to leave” Harry announced to the group that was sitting in the hall.

Mia grasped Penelope’s shoulders, “You can do it— just try! Focus!”

Penelope nodded with uncertainty, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath _“Expecto Patronum!”_ she called, and a large, silver spider shot out from the end of the wand, scurrying off after the stag, wolf and otter.

“Holy shit” Penelope breathed “I did it. I DID IT!”

“Wasn’t expecting a spider—” Mia said with a small chuckle, clasping a hand on her friend’s shoulder “But nice work”

They all followed the patronuses down the hall, the dementors now all having fled the area. They arrived at the lifts, only to find a soaking wet weasel-y looking man exiting one of them.

“Reg?” Mrs. Cattermole asked, wide eyed. “Why are you all wet?”

“Water” The man said weakly, wiping his wet forehead “Harry, Hermione; they know there is an intruder— I reckon we have 5 minutes”

“Wait— _Ron?_ ” Mia asked, narrowing her eyes

“Mia? Penelope? Blimey, I didn’t expect to see you tw—“ he stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening “is that a spider?” Ron’s unfamiliar face drained of all color, his voice raising an octave as he backed up a few steps “Is that a _spider?!_ ”

“Oh, it’s just a patronus, Ron—“ Hermione cried “come on!”

They all entered the lifts, rising up and up until the lift shuddered to a halt, the disembodied voice speaking ‘ _level 8, atrium.’_ They filed out of the lifts, looking at wizards sealing off all of the fireplaces.

“STOP!” Harry called “This lot needs to leave before you seal off the fireplaces.”

“We were told no one is to leave” a wizard called “aren’t those the mudbloods awaiting trial?”

“Their blood is pure, which is more than I can say about most of you, I’m sure.” Harry growled “now let ‘em through!”

The Muggle-borns filed into the open fireplaces, the last ones to leave were Penelope and Mrs. Cattermole. A man identical to the one Ron was impersonating came running into the Atrium, out of breath and panicked. 

“Reg?” Mrs. Cattermole asked, looking from Ron to her husband incredulously.

Ron swore loudly, pushing Reg and his wife towards the fire place. “Go, now!” he said. They obliged without much protest, disappearing up the chimney. Mia turned to Penelope, pointing to a fireplace.

“Penny, go home and tell Remus what happened—”

“What?” Penelope cried “No, I’m not leaving you here!” 

“I can’t leave! Yaxley will have my head if he knows I helped—”

“Stop right there!” Yaxley’s voice shouted from the lifts “Stop them! Their helping mudbloods escape!”

Mia swore as Yaxley came running after them. Harry threw one of the hardest punches he could at him, hitting him square in the jaw. He, Ron and Hermione grabbed hands, sprinting towards the nearest fireplace. Yaxley didn’t falter much; he sprung up almost as quickly as he fell, and grabbed ahold of Hermione’s robes. Mia acted without thinking, grasping Penelope’s hand with one of her own, and lunging at Yaxley, catching the tail of his robes as they were vacuumed up the chimney.

The wind was knocked out of her as Mia landed with a thud on grass. She scrambled to her feet, coughing and looking around wildly for Penelope. She recognized they were at 12 Grimmauld Place, and Harry, Ron and Hermione were nowhere to be found. She spotted Penelope across the lawn and took off after her, screaming her name as Penelope stumbled to her feet. Yaxley sent a few hexes at her, the spells whizzing just over her head as she ran. She grasped Penelope’s hand as Yaxley lunged at them— just as she initiated the apparition, she felt him grab onto her robes as they were vacuumed away once more.

They hit the floor of their living room, Mia wasting no time to send a stunning charm at Yaxley. He flew back and hit the television set, shattering the glass and collapsing into a heap. Her mind raced, panicking with what to do that Remus hollering swear words didn’t even register to her. The back of her left hand stung harshly; she looked down, noticing her skin was missing atop the very peaks of her knuckles. _Splinched._ She was thankful it was just the skin on her knuckles and not her entire hand. She bit her lip and looked around wildly, wracking her brain with what to do about the unconscious wizard before her. She couldn’t focus; her adrenaline was surging through her so intensely she started to shake. Frankie and Lionel hooted irritably, banging against their wire cages as they flapped their wings.

_“Incarcerous!”_

Black ropes flew from Remus’s wand and bound Yaxley; if he were to wake up, he certainly would not be able to move. Mia rushed to his side ripped his wand out of his hand, shoving it in the waistband of her skirt.

“What the hell is this?!” Remus hollered “What happened?!”

Penelope let out a squeak, unable to form a coherent sentence. Mia took a deep breath, rubbing her face furiously as she let out a frustrated groan. “Things might’ve gotten out of hand…”

“ _Might’ve?!_ ” Remus asked incredulously “Why the hell is Corban Yaxley in our living room?”

“He followed us out of the Ministry!” She said “Harry was there, with Ron and Hermione…”

“Wait _what?_ ” Remus narrowed his eyes “why were they there?”

“I don’t know, but we helped them get out, but Yaxley followed us to Headquarters. He grabbed onto my robes- well, I grabbed his robes first, and then he grabbed mine…”

Remus held his hands up to stop her “This compromises the Fidelius charm!” he hissed “We can’t stay here anymore!”

“You think I don’t know that?!” Mia snapped “you think I don’t know what deep shit we are in right now?!”

Yaxley began to stir; Remus sent a stunning charm at him, knocking him back to silence again.

“We need to hit the road. Get changed and pack your things—“Remus said, grasping his hair in exasperation “I need to find a place to dump him”

“Where are we going? We need to call Eric” Penelope interjected

Remus stopped, looking at Penelope regretfully “Penny, he can’t come with us…”

“So… what?— we just leave and not tell him where we are going??” She snapped “Absolutely not, I’m not leaving without him!”

Mia jumped in, holding her hands up in an attempt to console Penelope. “Let’s go to my Mum’s— we can call him from her place, and figure out a plan there”

Remus sighed heavily, eyeing Yaxley with extreme displeasure before turning back to the girls “Go pack your things,” he muttered quietly, then gestured to the unconscious wizard “I’ll deal with him”

Mia opened Frankie and Lionel’s cages, “go fly to Susan Roswell’s house. We’ll meet you there” she gave both owls a treat biscuit, and sent them out the window. She watched as the two owls flew in formation, growing smaller against the sky. She felt Remus’s hand lightly grip her shoulder, non-verbally reminding her to go and pack her things.

Once in her bedroom, she began throwing whatever she could see into a suitcase with shaking hands, unsure of where they would be going and what they would need. She threw all she could find inside; clothes, shoes, an array of sleeping draughts, Remus’s whole stash of wolfsbane. She went to throw her photo frames in with her things, stopping to admire a photo of her and Sirius making silly faces in the infinite loop of the photograph. What she wouldn’t give to return to that moment, that moment where life was still easy, simple, and she still had hope that their side would win this war. Now, standing here with a half packed suitcase getting ready to go on the run, she felt more helpless than she ever had in her entire life.

* * *

“You two—“ Susan pointed to Mia and Penelope sternly “are in _deep shit._ ”

Susan scowled at the girls bowing their heads on the couch as Remus paced behind them.

“Mum, Harry was there…” Mia began

“Oh I know Harry, Ron and Hermione broke into the Ministry” Susan scoffed “Trust me, we heard all about it, and about you, I might add—“

“What was I supposed to do?” Mia snapped, cutting her off “plus, I had to get Penelope out of there!”

Susan sighed, rubbing her face and letting out a frustrated growl. “At least tell me what you did with Yaxley?”

“I ditched him behind a dumpster— unconscious” Remus said “we kept him knocked out, but since he already got through the Fidelius chart—”

“Yes, you cannot go back to your flat.” Susan said sourly “But you cannot stay here— it’s only a matter of time before I am going to have to go on the run as well.”

“Mum, why don’t you come with us?” Mia asked “It can’t be worse than going back to work”

“No, I can’t leave the Prime Minister” Susan shook her head “Not until Kingsley and I can make other arrangements for his safety.”

“Susan, may I use your phone?” Penelope piped up “I need to make some calls”

“Yes, go” Susan gestured to the kitchen. “Tell your parents not to come back to the country— it’s not safe for them”

Penelope made her way to the phone as Susan turned her attention to Remus and Mia, crossing her arms and pursing her lips.

“Well, I just hope you two have a plan…”

“We don’t— yet” Mia said quietly “that’s why we are here…”

Susan sighed heavily. “I can’t believe this; this is such a mess…”

Penelope was on the phone for quite some time with her parents before calling Eric. Mia, Remus and Susan remained silent to listen to Penelope’s side of the phone conversations. 

“Mum and Dad are going to stay in Italy for a while—“ she announced as she reentered the living room “and Eric is on his way over here”

“You can’t possibly be thinking your bringing a muggle with you…?” Susan looked at Penelope incredulously. Penelope rounded her shoulders, biting her lip awkwardly “Oh, sweetie… you can’t take him with you.”

“Why not?!” Penelope snapped “I can’t just leave without him!”

“Not only is he essentially defenseless, but he is in the military—“ Susan said “he can’t just abandon the Air Force”

“He gets out next month!” Penelope cried “We just talked about it last week. He isn’t renewing his contract” she burst into tears, sobbing profusely. “We were waiting to see how the trial went— he didn’t renew so he could stay with me…” Mia threw her arms around her, holding her tightly as she blubbered “I love him, I haven’t even told him yet, but I am in love with him. I can’t leave him behind; I don’t want to leave him behind!”

“shhhh….” Mia whispered soothingly, shooting her mother a dirty glance “Let’s just wait until he gets here, then we can all discuss it”

A half-hour later, Eric arrived. He rushed to Penelope’s side and pulled her into a tight embrace, allowing her to sob against his chest. “You’re ok, you’re alright…” he whispered soothingly

“I’m far from alright!” she snapped, her voice muffled against his chest “I’m a fugitive!”

Eric embraced her tighter, looking between Susan, Remus and Mia. “What are we going to do?” he asked quietly.

Remus shifted awkwardly as Susan crossed her arms. Mia cast her eyes downward, chewing her bottom lip and picking her fingernails. Remus cleared his throat, taking the lead in the uncomfortable conversation.

“Taking a muggle on the road isn’t a good idea…”

Eric furrowed his brow and held a hand up to silence him “Wait— you expect me to just let her go without me?”

“You still have a month in the Air Force…” Remus said

“Let me talk to my commanding officer, I can work something out— I’m literally on my way out anyway!”

“You can’t defend yourself!” Susan interjected “You would be a sitting duck!”

“I have _guns!_ ” Eric cried “Guns, knives— goddamn _pepper spray!_ For Christ’s sake, I have my fucking black belt in taekwondo— I could crack Remus in half!”

Remus scoffed, leaning back against the fireplace mantle and rolling his eyes. “Could not…” he muttered contemptuously, under his breath.

“That is nothing compared to a wand!” Susan hissed “a gun will do you no good against a wand!”

“It will, if I am faster than the wand” Eric said matter of fact “Penelope, what do you think?”

“I don’t want to go without you…” she whimpered “I can’t leave you…”

“Then it’s settled.” Eric said simply “Let me go talk to my commanding officer. Mia, come with me so you can do a memory charm thing-y if we need to”

“No—“ Susan ordered “Thicknesse has Aurors crawling all over the city— I’m supposed to be out patrolling myself.”

“I’ll go” Remus said with a heavy sigh “They aren’t looking for me”

“Yet” Susan said darkly.

“Alright, Remus, let’s go” Eric said. He kissed Penelope on the forehead and stroked her cheek “I’ll be back, alright? I won’t be gone long”

Penelope nodded and let out a choking sniffle as she gave him another hug. Mia grabbed Remus’s wrist, her slender fingers wrapping around the smooth gold band that tethered the two of them together.

“Be careful” she ordered

“I always am” he gave her a quick peck on the lips “stay put— don’t leave this house”

Mia agreed with a nod. Remus cast a disillusionment charm over himself before he and Eric set out. The girls were silent as they listened to the start of the car engine outside, straining to hear its soft hum grow softer and softer. After a moment,

“Well, you guys are going to need some help.” Susan said with a heavy sigh “let me make some calls”

She threw a small handful of floo powder into the hearth of the fireplace, the flames turning from a soft orange-yellow to bright emerald green. Susan stuck her head into the fireplace; she seemed to be on the call for ages before she yanked her head back out and dusted ash out of her raven black hair.

“Give them some time, but help is coming”

* * *

Hours passed; Remus and Eric were still gone and the girls were starting to get antsy. Mia was amazed that Penelope still had tears left to cry— by this point it would’ve been expected for her to cry herself dry. Unexpectedly, a familiar voice rang through the fireplace, echoing through the entire first floor of the house.

“Susan? May we join you? It’s Kingsley, Cepheus and I”

“Is that Delphinus??” Mia whispered, craning to look at the fireplace.

Susan nodded “Why did you choose a bouquet of Carnations as your sympathy flowers after my ex-husband passed?”

“Carnations are Ohio’s state flower, where he was from.” Delphinus replied.

Her almost monotone, calm, stately voice was comforting to Mia; a familiar face to ease a crisis.

“You may enter” Susan said.

Delphinus glided in the room through a roar of emerald flames, followed by Kingsley, and another buff wizard that resembled Delphinus extremely well.

“Where is the Prime Minister??” Susan asked

“In his office, heavily enchanted.” Kingsley replied “This was more important.”

Delphinus turned to Mia, looking to her apathetically. “You realize the amount of work I am going to have since you won’t be returning to my office?” 

Mia gave an awkward shrug “Sorry...” she mumbled sheepishly

“I foresaw this, I have an interview for a new aide scheduled on Monday” Delphinus replied simply, but not unkindly. “This is my baby brother, Cepheus— best curse-breaker Gringotts has in Egypt.”

“I am not a baby, Del” The buff wizard replied with a huff. He stuck his large hand out to shake the girl’s, flashing a handsome smile at both of them “Cepheus Gamal, I wish we were meeting on better circumstances”

The girls shook Cepheus’s hand politely, his hand swallowing both of theirs in size comparison.

“Penelope Clearwater” 

“Mia Lupin”

“Cepheus and I were beaters for Hufflepuff in our last few years in school” Kingsley said, clasping a hand on the buff wizard’s shoulder

“You played quidditch?” Mia said incredulously “How did I not know this?”

“Never mind that—“Susan turned to Cepheus “Did you bring what I asked for?”

Cepheus grinned “It’s all in here” he said, handing Susan a small velvet pouch.

“What’s in that?” Mia asked, her brow furrowing 

“Supplies” Delphinus said evenly “A tent, camping equipment, some essence of dittany, blood replenishing potions, common antidote to poisons, burn healing paste, sleeping draughts; we wanted to make sure you lot had some basic medical supplies— hopefully you won’t need it”

“All of that is in there?” Penelope inquired

“Extension charm, of course” Kingsley said “There is pretty much anything you’d need in case you are stuck in the woods for a few days— Cepheus likes to camp, so he had most of the camping supplies on hand.”

Cepheus shrugged “I find it helps me connect to nature”

“ _Guns!_ ”

Eric’s voice boomed through the house as he and Remus came bustling in the front door, a few oblong large bags slung over their shoulders, and a small suitcase levitating behind them.

“And lots of ‘em! I’ve got three hand guns and two shotguns with plenty of ammo.” Eric turned to Susan, giving her a petulant glance “Don’t try to tell me I am defenseless” 

“He’s out— thanks to a little memory modification and some changes to his personnel file” Remus said, smiling slightly. “Who’s this?” he added, his eyes darting between the unfamiliar witch and wizard.

“This is my boss, Delphinus” Mia pointed to Delphinus, who gave Remus a stately nod “and her brother Cepheus— they hooked us up with camping supplies”

“We shouldn’t need it if we are going to—“

“STOP!” Susan cried “Don’t tell us where you are going”

“In case we are questioned with veritasserum” Kingsley added “we can’t know.”

Mia nodded “Thank you, Delphinus, Cepheus.” she nodded to the two siblings “We appreciate this more than we can say”

“Of course” Cepheus said “A friend of Kingsley or Del is a friend of mine”

“Thank you—“ Remus shook their hands “Thank you for your help”

“We are going to leave, I’ll be back in an hour” Susan said “Don’t be here when I get back”

Mia threw her arms around her mother, hugging her tightly “I love you, mum”

“Me too, sweetie.”

Delphinus, Cepheus, Kingsley and Susan all left through the fireplace, leaving the group in silence, staring at one another.

“Eric and I spoke on the way over; we are heading to the cottage. We’ll drive; I don’t trust the Floo network” Remus said, breaking the silence.

Eric kneeled down in front of Penelope sitting on the couch, taking her hands in his.

“I’m going to see about getting us plane tickets before we head out—“ he said heavily “I’m going to take us to my mom’s in Cincinnati.”

“The four of us?” Penelope asked

“It’s just Eric and you going” Remus said solemnly “Mia and I have to stay in the country in case the Order needs us”

“No! I can’t leave you guys!” Penelope cried “You agreed to this??” she looked at Eric incredulously

“It seemed like the best option, he insisted they can’t come” Eric said “we can have your parents come stay as well— I need to call my mom still, but I know she’ll be fine with it.”

Penelope’s skin paled as she opened and closed her mouth a few times. After a moment, she simply nodded, slinking back against the couch.

“Make the calls you need to while we are still here” Remus said “The cottage doesn’t have a phone”

Eric scurried off, on the phone for a few minutes before he returned, his head slung low. "Well, I called the airline—“ Eric looked at the three of them despondently “Penelope is on a no-fly list”

Penelope let out a soft wail, burying her face in her hands “I’m so fucked!” she cried.

“What does that mean?” Remus asked “She can’t get on a plane?”

“Exactly; I can’t get her a ticket”

“Yaxley” Mia growled. “This is Yaxley’s doing—“

“Then what are we going to do if I can’t get her out of the country?”

Mia thought for a minute “Polyjuice. We can use polyjuice to get her on the plane”

“We don’t have polyjuice just lying around, Mad-eye’s stash has been used already” Remus said heavily

“Then we’ll have to brew some; we can get the ingredients from the village nearby the cottage. Eric, do you have anyone you trust that could send you their passport and a few strands of their hair?”

“I can call my sister, I’m sure she’d do it”

“Great— call her. I’ll send Lionel to get it from her”

“She’s going to think I’m crazy, sending an owl…” Eric muttered as he went back to the telephone. Mia, Remus and Penelope double checked all their bags for necessary items, listening and stifling laughter as Eric argued with his sister over the phone. _Muggles._

“ASHLEY! Can you just do it? I know it sounds weird, but the owl’s name is Lionel— I KNOW! Just give your passport and a few pieces of your— NO I’m not high! Just do it, _please?_...Thank you!” Eric slammed the phone back onto the hook, sweating as he made his way back into the living room. “She thinks I’m high as a kite, but she agreed to it”

“Excellent, let’s get going— “ Remus said “stuff Eric’s things into the pouch.”

The four of them grabbed the bags of guns and his suitcase, forcing it down into the small velvet pouch along with Cepheus’s camping supplies, and the rest of their belongings. Mia curled up the pouch and shoved it into the back pocket of her jeans. Remus cast disillusionment charms onto Penelope and Mia as the girls got into the back seat, and Remus in the passenger seat. Penelope reached over and grasped Mia’s hand as they pulled out of the drive, looking to her earnestly.

“I love you” she whispered. “Thank you”

Mia smiled weakly, giving Penelope’s hand a light squeeze.

“I love you too”


	56. chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else get chewed up and spat back out by the holidays? Because I did!
> 
> Regardless, I hope you enjoyed your holiday season with your friends and family!
> 
> Merry Christmas!

Something about the cottage was different. It seemed dingier, and more tumble-down than Mia had ever realized it was. The gravel drive crunched under the tires of Eric’s jeep as they pulled up to the cottage. The orange and red sunset cast an odd hue over the grounds and the lake adjacent, giving the impression of haunting tranquility. It was hard to think that just a couple weeks ago, the ramshackle little house and its grounds had served as the setting for their nuptials— it had been rustic, beautiful, the perfect place to host their family and friends then. Now, life had flipped upside-down, and she wasn’t seeing the cottage through rose colored glasses anymore.

“Careful going up the front steps, there’s a rotten spot somewhere on the stoop” Remus said with a small chuckle.

They climbed out of the jeep, Remus wasting no time to take a lap around the cottage with his wand drawn, inspecting that they had no trespassers.

“Girls, wands at the ready when you go inside—” he called from around the house “—just in case”

Mia and Penelope drew their wands, walking up the front stoop together with Eric trailing close behind them. They were careful to avoid the rotting wood of the stairs, stepping carefully over the sloping front porch. Mia turned the doorknob slowly and pushed the door open, taking a look inside before stepping through the threshold. The cottage seemed to be undisturbed, and after a sweep through the bedrooms and living space, Mia began pulling their things from the velvet pouch she had stowed in her back pocket.

“What time is it?” she asked, grunting as she hoisted one of Eric’s shotgun cases.

“Just after 8—” Eric said, looking at his watch “what food is here? I’m starving!”

“Mmm, I’m not sure what’s left after my bachelor party— help yourself to whatever is in there.”

Remus gestured to the kitchen; Eric began rummaging in the cabinets as Mia continued. “We need to get into town for polyjuice ingredients; we need to get it brewing right away” 

“These shops close early” Remus said “we’ll have to go in the morning.”

“Pasta!” Eric called back “aaand…. canned beans!”

“Is that all that’s in there?” Remus asked “there’s got to be at least a little bit more…”

“A few cans of tuna, a lot of scotch, some tea and coffee…” Eric called “fridge has… Mustard— and expired milk.”

He pulled the carton of milk out of the fridge with a sour look on his face, tossing it into the garbage can. Mia giggled and shook her head at him, waving her wand and vanishing the carton out of sight. “Magic has its perks…” she whispered, winking.

“Well, I packed snacks at least,” Penelope said, opening her suitcase “Mostly junk food, but I’ve got chips, licorice wands, crackers…”

“We’ll have to get groceries while we’re out too” Remus said, clasping his hands together “I guess for tonight we’ll have to just snack. Make yourselves at home— my house is your house now”

* * *

Cold sweat coated her forehead and chest as Mia jolted awake. Her father’s screams and groans still rung in her ears as she blinked the cottage bedroom into view. Remus was not next to her, but a bit of golden light seeping from the gap under the door led her out into the living room to find him in the arm chair. The fireplace was warm; orange flames licked the logs gently as the occasional crackle of wood echoed through the quiet cottage. Remus sat with a book in one hand and a glass of scotch in the other, and a few empty licorice wand wrappers on the side table next to him. He turned his head to her when he heard her light footstep— his eyes roamed quickly over her petite body dressed only in her panties and a flimsy camisole. He snapped his book shut and set it on the end table, resting his glass of scotch atop its cover.

“Hey sweetheart, everything alright?”

“Yeah— just a bad dream” she said, frowning at him “You can’t sleep?”

“No, I couldn’t shut my brain off—“ he pointed up his book “escaping my thoughts with Jay Gatsby”

Mia snubbed her nose at the hardback copy of The Great Gatsby as she made her way to the kitchen, clanking around for a glass of water.

“I hated that book” she called back

“Did you read the whole thing?” he asked with a chuckle

“Just bits and pieces,” she shrugged, walking back into the living room “Couldn’t get into it”

“You should read the _whole_ thing, you might like it more” he laughed “Come here— you want to sit with me? The fire is warm.”

He didn’t have to ask her twice— she crawled into his lap, nuzzling her head against his neck as he wrapped his arms around her. She raised her hand and summoned a throw blanket from across the room, catching it with ease and wrapping it around them. She took comfort in his strong arms embracing her, and the feeling of his 5 o clock shadow Velcro-ing to the top of her head, messing up her hair. She nuzzled herself closer against him; there was no place in the world that she felt safer than in his arms.

“Think Penelope is sleeping ok?” he murmured in her ear.

“I hope so,” she replied “I think Eric being here helps.”

“Crazy, those two—” he chuckled “This time last year he was pining after you.”

“Shut up,” she rolled her eyes “and don’t mention the bathroom, either.”

They both laughed as Remus kissed her forehead “that little shit has grown on me the past month or so. He’s not so bad”

“Think it was still a good idea to let him come along?” she asked

“I never thought it was a good idea,” Remus had a contemplative expression on his face, as if weighing his thoughts before speaking “but if someone tried to tell me I had to leave you behind, I would’ve put up an even bigger fight. He loves her, he told me on the way back from Lakenheath.”

“Maybe they should tell each other,” Mia giggled “I remember the night I was going to tell you I loved you— my heart was pounding in my ears I was so nervous.”

“That was the night you met Sirius instead, right?” he asked, amused. “I believe I remember the look of terror on your face when you recognized him.”

“I was more than terrified” she laughed “It sounds so silly now, to have ever felt afraid of Sirius.”

They were silent for a moment as Mia’s heart panged for her lost friend. Her eyes roamed to Remus’s glass of scotch; she hated scotch and its strong taste, but she would down that glass in an instant right now.

“I miss him so much.” she said softly.

“I do too,” he replied, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear “This war has taken so much from us.”

“What if something happens to one of us?” Mia asked weakly “What happens if we can’t get Penelope on a plane or if one of us is…”

“Hey hey—“ he cut her off “you have to stop thinking like that. We’re going to be alright, have faith.”

Mia’s chin began to quiver “I can’t lose anyone else. I can’t handle it.”

“Stop,” he ordered softly “Look at me—“ she obliged, fighting the stinging behind her eyes as she took comfort in his gaze “We need to think positive, alright? There is power in positive thinking— it’s a real thing.”

She nodded, rubbing her eyes and face roughly as she fought the lump forming in her throat. She nuzzled herself back against him, allowing his stubble to velco her hair once more.

“How are you doing alright with all this? How are you so calm and collected?”

“I wouldn’t say I’m alright,” he admitted playfully “I’m awake at 3am with a glass of scotch and a book.”

Mia still eyed his scotch atop the cover of The Great Gatsby. _You don’t need it, Mia. You don’t need it._

“Will you read your stupid book to me?” she sniffed “I want to escape with you.”

"Let’s see if I can’t get you to like this book…” He kissed her forehead; he moved his glass and picked his book back up, opening the page to his bookmark. 

_“And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves growing on the trees, just as things grow in fast movies, I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer...”_

She closed her eyes, allowing his smooth baritone voice to relax her mind, and allow her to escape into a story, forgetting her troubles— even if just for a few moments.

* * *

“Is it safe to go out??” Penelope asked nervously “Will there be Aurors looking for us?”

The four of them stood dressed and ready to head into the neighboring village for groceries and polyjuice supplies. Mia had spent all morning trying to explain the conversion of wizarding currency to muggle currency to Eric, in an attempt to help him blend in with the wizarding world as much as possible.

“Probably not this far from London yet,” Remus said “plus the village is pretty small, I doubt they’d patrol this area first— just have wands ready, just in case.”

“Well, I’m packing,” Eric said, holding his shirt up to reveal two pistols he had stuck in the waistband of his jeans “and you guys think I’m defenseless, pfft…”

The small village seemed untouched by the cruel world around them. London had seemed to be caving in on them, but here in this secluded town, Mia was reminded of the days that she and Remus would stroll through after kayaking on the lake, enjoying peaceful walks through the small town square.

“Uh, hey guys— come look at this!”

Before they made it into the little market that Remus recommended for potion supplies, Eric’s attention was drawn to the town memo board, his face draining of color as he beckoned them to come look at what he was seeing. Mia’s heart sank when she realized Eric had discovered three Ministry-issued wanted posters; one for her, Penelope, and Remus.

_Penelope Clearwater_

_Known muggle-born, wanted for fleeing Ministry custody._

_1000 Galleons on her head_

Penelope’s photo looked to be her identification photo from her NEWT tests— she was dressed her Hogwarts uniform and her ashy curls were tied up in a ponytail with a blue ribbon. She was sitting in front of the same plain backdrop as Mia had for her own NEWT identification photo.

_Remus Lupin_

_Werewolf, wanted for performing a werewolf mating ritual on a human._

_1000 Galleons on his head_

Remus looked younger in his photo, less gray in his hair albeit his robes pictured from the waist up were tattered and faded; this must be a staff picture from when he started teaching, his gray sweater looking like one she remembered tearing off of him one day after patronus lessons.

_Amelia Lupin_

_Wanted for assisting muggle-born in evading trial; unregistered Animagus— white wolf._

_1000 Galleons on her head_

She recognized the photograph of herself from the file Delphinus showed her; her NEWT identification photo that showcased her garnet jeweled earlobe and perfectly knotted Ravenclaw tie. Her stomach lurched as she reread the posters over and over. _1000 galleons?_ A steep reward for each of them, she felt. With a bounty of that stature, certainly Aurors, bounty hunters and random bystanders would keep their eyes peeled for fugitives that carried such a reward.

“Why does this poster say you are an unregistered Animagus?” Remus gripped her shoulder, speaking softly but sternly in her ear. 

“Because I am an unregistered Animagus…”

Remus gritted his teeth so hard it was audible, his firm grasp on her shoulder tightening “Who else besides the Order would know about that? Who did you reveal yourself to?— Have you not been careful?”

Mia took a shuddering breath; she was going to have to tell him about her conversation with Yaxley— there was no way she could get around telling him now.

“Yaxley” she said, frowning “He dosed me with veritasserum; it was one of the things I told him.”

“He did _what?!_ ” Remus snapped “When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Last week— Friday.” 

“Is that why you were so upset after work?— you— you _lied_ to me!”

“No, I didn’t lie!” she squeaked quickly “I just… withheld information.”

Remus let out a defeated grunt as he rubbed his face roughly. “I need to know _exactly_ what happened.”

“Uh, guys— maybe we should take this conversation away from the scary posters with your faces...”

Eric had attempted to step in, putting his arm between them in an attempt to separate Remus’s grip from Mia’s shoulder. Remus shot him an irritated look before grasping Mia’s wrist instead, disapparating on the spot. They appeared back in the living room of the cottage, Penelope and Eric popping in just a moment after them. Mia sunk down on the couch, picking at her fingernails as she focused her gaze on a splitting floorboard before her.

“Tell me what happened!” he snapped. “Start from the beginning!”

“He had me come to his office and he dosed my tea with veritasserum.”

“You drank his _tea?_ ” Remus asked incredulously “you drank tea given to you by a _Death Eater?!_ ”

“I fucked up! Ok?” she snarled “I know I fucked up— you don’t have to remind me!”

Remus clenched and unclenched his jaw for a moment before proceeding with a calmer tone of voice. “What all did you tell him?”

“That I was an unregistered Animagus… He asked about Harry… mine and mum’s home locations— but I wasn’t able to tell him anything about that of course”

Remus eyed her appraisingly. “That’s it?”

“That’s all the important stuff” she said softly, picking at her left index finger so vigorously that her cuticle started bleeding.

“I want to know _everything_ you told him.” he said firmly

Penelope and Eric slunk back in the corner, feeling uncomfortable for intruding on a private conversation.

“We talked about you; he said some anti-werewolf things, and I told him to eat shit. There’s nothing really to report.”

Remus studied her more intently. “I know you, Mia; there is something you’re not telling me.”

Mia felt uncomfortable under his gaze; she didn’t meet his eyes as shame and irritation flooded through her. She just wanted him to drop it— she didn’t want to relive those humiliating few minutes by recounting the experience.

“Mia, what is it that you are not telling me?”

“What do you want to know, huh?” she shouted “That he shackled me to the chair and slid his hand up my skirt as he asked me how I wanted to be touched? That he threatened to not be as gentle with me the next time if I crossed him? I knew you’d flip out if I told you what happened!”

Remus’s face turned purple; he clasped his hands into tight fists and let out a frustrated growl “You’re right, I’d have killed that slimy piece of—“

“Our side doesn’t kill!” She cried, and then took a deep breath to steady her emotions before speaking again. “He is Andrew Flint’s uncle. He humiliated me, and I— I just wanted to forget it happened.”

His face softened as he knelt down in front of her. He reached out to stroke her cheek, but she swatted his hand away. The look in his eyes made her angry, for it was a look of pity. She didn’t want his pity; if he pitied her, it would make her a victim— something she refused to be.

“Don’t touch me, and don’t look at me like that!” She snapped “Yaxley put out those wanted posters to fuck us— we are screwed now, how are we supposed to get the polyjuice ingredients if we can’t step foot in public?”

“We can send Eric— he isn’t wanted,” Penelope suggested, stepping in to attempt to deescalate “Give him a list, he can ask a store counter clerk for the ingredients. All of polyjuice’s ingredients are common, so nothing should trigger any red flags”

“I can do it” Eric said “But someone has to explain the wizard money to me again…”

After another lesson on galleons, sickles and knuts, Eric was sent off to the village with a grocery and potion ingredient list. Remus stopped him at the front door, muttering something into his ear that based on his body language, he didn’t want Mia or Penelope to know what he was telling him. Penelope spent most of the time Eric was gone helping Mia with some tiding and organization around the cottage. Remus kept to himself, only offering the girls tea and polite small talk. He treaded lightly around her, as if walking on egg shells.

Eric returned a couple hours later with bags of groceries and a sack of potion ingredients. Mia took the ingredients and started on the polyjuice potion right away, wasting no time since the brew took one whole month to make. Remus started on dinner for the four of them, occasionally bumping shoulders with Mia as he clambered about the kitchen. The tension between them wasn’t heavy with anger, but more so like awkward old friends reuniting for the first time in years, but no longer had anything in common. They spent most of dinner asking Eric about his plans for when he and Penelope got to America.

“Well, my mom said we can stay with her as long as we need, and I’ll start to look for an engineering position once we get there. Ashley— the sister whose passport we’re using— lives in Chicago, but my other sister Kate goes to community college, and lives at home.” Eric went on and on about his favorite places, what he was going to show her first and where they would eat. “Oh, and you _have_ to have Skyline Chili,” he exclaimed “Cincinnati’s signature chili recipe is unlike anything you’ve ever had!”

Hearing all the excitement from Eric about showing Penelope his old stomping grounds struck a twinge of jealously with Mia. If she were being completely honest, she would love for her and Remus to join them on their trip to America, to get away from this terrible war and never look back. It would be easy, to run away outside of the Ministry of Magic’s regime, but she knew they couldn’t. Both of them had made a commitment to serve the Order of the Phoenix until the end. _Until the end_ — she had originally thought that would mean ‘until they won’, but now, she wasn’t quite sure if there would be an end before her lifetime.

They spent the evening playing cards, occasionally stirring the polyjuice potion before everyone decided it was time to rest. Crawling into bed next to Remus was uncomfortable; they had barely said anything more than small talk to each other since their argument this morning.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Yaxley” she whispered.

Remus didn’t respond to her apology, changing the subject. “Do you need a sleeping draught for tonight? — since you couldn’t sleep last night?”

“No” she said, shaking her head “I don’t want to get hooked on them”

He nodded, and the room fell quiet. She partially wished she would’ve accepted the sleeping draught, but she needed to save their limited supply for the nights that she woke up in cold sweat. She looked at him earnestly as he lay with his eyes closed, moonlight illuminating his face with a soft twinge of bluish-gray. She wanted his comfort; their invisible tether that she had felt since he had bitten her tugged at her, begging him for his reassurance and touch.

“Remus?”

“hmm?”

“…will you hold me?”

She felt like a stupid child asking, as if she was a little girl asking to crawl into bed with her parents after a bad dream. He opened his eyes quickly, turning his head to her with a doleful expression.

“Of course— come here”

She scooched up next to him and rested her head in the crook of his shoulder; his long arm wrapped around her and held her close. She felt instantly relaxed in his embrace.

“Do you know how much I love you?” he said softly

“Yes” she said, chuckling.

“No,” he whispered, kissing her forehead “I don’t think you do.”

* * *

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

Penelope’s shrill shriek snapped Mia out of a deep sleep, sitting up quickly as Penelope jumped onto the bed and hugged her. Sunlight shone through the gap in the moth eaten curtains hanging over the window, nearly blinding her as Penelope situated herself next to her.

“We made breakfast!”

Remus and Eric walked in with a breakfast tray of eggs, bacon and oatmeal, topped with a cup of coffee. ‘22’ was written in ketchup overtop of the eggs, and a small half burnt candle was stuck down in the middle of the oatmeal.

“Aw, you guys shouldn’t have…”

As lovely as breakfast in bed was, they really shouldn’t’ve. The sight of food made Mia’s stomach churn irritably, a lump forming in her throat as if to stop any food from going down her esophagus. She wasn’t much in the mood for eating, let alone celebrating her birthday. Eric handed Mia the tray eagerly as Remus set down a second tray with mugs filled with piping hot coffee at the edge of the bed.

“Eat up!” Penelope said, reaching for a mug “Remus wants us to try some dueling after breakfast”

It seemed odd, to be celebrating her 22nd birthday whilst they were hiding from Ministry capture. Nevertheless, she attempted to eat, struggling with every bite. They had made way too much food; on a day she wasn’t dealing with a boatload of stress, it probably would’ve been an acceptable portion. Today though, each bite created the uncomfortable sensation of glass shards cutting her throat. The sight of the uneaten portion of her food was overwhelming— _daunting._ Mia tried, she really did. She took tiny bites as she forced herself to make small talk with Penelope and Eric, feeling Remus’s eyes on her every time she attempted to push food around to make it look like she had eaten more than she actually had.

“Would it be alright if I had a few moments alone with my wife?” Remus interjected.

“Ew!” Penelope squealed “code for shagging— let’s go”

Penelope grabbed Eric’s hand and dragged him out of the room, Mia chuckling at hearing him whisper they as the disappeared into the hallway (“well, if they are going to, maybe we should…”). Remus waited to speak until he heard the second bedroom’s door shut.

“Not much in the mood for eating?”

“No,” she shook her head. “Can I be finished please?”

He nodded stiffly, then took her tray and sat it atop the dresser. “I know this isn’t the best way to be spending your birthday…”

“I’m fine, really—” she muttered “It’s just another day, right?”

He frowned, then reached into the front of his robes and pulled out a thin, poorly wrapped parcel and handed it to her “I had Eric pick you up something while he was in town— a gift.”

“Aw, Remus—“She tore the wrapping off gently; wrapped up was a handsome black leather journal, with gold-foil tipped pages. She opened the front cover to a note scrawled on the inside leaf in Remus’s labored handwriting.

> Mia,
> 
> To express your feelings when speaking them aloud is too daunting.
> 
> Happy birthday, my love.
> 
> Yours,
> 
> Remus

“I understand why you didn’t tell me about Yaxley” he said “I know talking about the way you feel doesn’t come naturally, even after all the work Helen did. I thought you could write your feelings in here, if you didn’t feel comfortable sharing,” he pulled her into an embrace and kissed her forehead. “I have another present for you, too.”

“Yeah?” Her brow furrowed. “What’s that?”

A mischievous, boyish smile spread across his face. “It requires you to put a silencing charm on the room…”

Mia giggled and waved her hand; the bedroom door slammed shut and a flash of light zoomed all around the walls. They fell into bed together, hungrily tearing at each other’s clothes and tongues swirling together in rhythm. For the next few minutes, his kisses made her forget all about the Ministry of Magic, The Muggle-born Registration Commission, and the war impinging on them. 

* * *

“Come on, birthday girl— show us what you got!”

Eric cheered from the sideline as Mia and Penelope bowed to each other, preparing to duel one another. Penelope held her wand out in front of her as Mia raised her palms. Remus stood off to the side near Eric, overseeing and refereeing their duel.

“Mia, just shield for now,” he called “Once your shielding improves, we’ll go from there— on the count of three. One, two, three!”

_“Protego!”_

Mia threw her hands in front of her, a small bit of a shield just barely blocked Penelope’s stinging jinx. After a few minutes of just barely getting by, Penelope hit her with a full body bind that she was unable to block. Her arms and legs snapped together, and she fell forward onto her face.

 _“Finite incantetum!”_ Remus called, waving his wand.

Mia unfroze, groaning as she rose to all fours, then up on her knees. She spat out the mouthful of grass she had taken in and brushed the front of her clothes off, swearing profusely under her breath.

“You just need to focus, Mia” Remus said “You can do it”

“Don’t tell me to focus— I am focused!”

“Think about how we channeled a memory when we first lit the candle,” he said “Take yourself back to that feeling, fixate on it— these spells require more effort than simply creating a flame.”

Mia closed her eyes and transported herself to the moment where she watched Dolohov shoot a jet of green at her father, his screams ceasing before her eyes as she watched his writhing body fall still as stone. She concentrated on the feeling of Fenrir Greyback slicing through her legs like butter, then remembering watching him slash Bill’s face, and the warm, sticky feeling of his blood soaking her clothes as the savage werewolf climbed on top of her. She gritted her teeth; she allowed herself to feel anger, allowing her rage to take over. Her eyes snapped open, and she rose her palms up in front of her.

“Ok Penny, again!” she cried.

_“Petrificus Totalis!”_

_“Protego!”_

This time, Penelope’s full body bind hit Mia’s invisible shield, ricocheting off and back at her. Penelope’s arms and legs snapped together, and this time, it was her who got a mouthful of grass.

“That was excellent!” Remus shouted _“Finite Incantetum!”_

Penelope was free, standing up slowly and brushing herself off. “Nice work” she said with a chuckle

“That was badass” Eric said, clapping “Do it again!”

Remus turned to Mia, smiling broadly and nodding “Yes, again!”

Hours later they retreated back inside, both Mia and Penelope glistened with sweat and drug their feet in fatigue. Penelope immediately plopped down at the dining room table as Eric slid in next to her. Remus put a tea kettle on the stove as Mia tended the polyjuice potion. The brew was going smoothly so far— most of the upfront work was finished, but they would need to be patient as the potion took its time to brew.

“Alright, these lacewing flies need to stew for 21 days,” Mia said, dumping a vial of the insects into the cauldron, and then motioning to Eric. “Let’s go ahead and send Lionel to your sister.”

“I hope she follows my directions” Eric said with a haughty sigh “She was certain I was on drugs when I asked for some of her hair too…”

Mia trotted over to the owl’s cages, giving both Frankie and Lionel treats before taking Lionel out of his cage and opening a window.

“I need you to fly to America; Chicago— to Ashley Richardson. We need her passport and a lock of her hair.”

Lionel hooted softly as Mia tied a small pouch to his leg, containing instructions once again for Ashley to send back a clipping of her hair and her passport. The tawny owl flew out of the window without hesitation; Mia watched as he got smaller and smaller against the horizon, until he disappeared from view. Remus came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, gently kissing her neck as she leaned back against him.

“I’ve never sent him overseas before,” she said softly “I worry about him— what if it’s too far?”

“He’s an owl;” Remus said “he’ll be alright.”

Mia frowned “I hope so.”

“I know so—“ he chuckled “Come on, come have a cup of tea. I’m going to get started on dinner.”

His fingertips brushed her back gently as he gestured her over to the table next to Penelope and Eric. She sunk down into a chair; Penelope poured her a piping cup of tea and gave her a sad smile.

“I’m sorry you have to spend your birthday like this” she said “I didn’t mean for this all to happen”

“Don’t apologize,” Mia said, holding her hand up to silence her “You are my best friend, I would do anything for you— I have had a lovely birthday and I don’t regret helping you one bit”

Penelope reached over the table and grabbed Mia’s hand, squeezing it in affirmation. Their moment was interrupted by Remus poking his head out of the kitchen doorway. 

“How does everyone want their steak cooked?”

Eric and Penelope both piped up and requested medium. Remus looked at Mia with an impish grin, “and how about you, Mrs. Lupin?”

Mia rolled her eyes “You know how I want it cooked.”

“I don’t think I remember…” He jeered “If you don’t remind me, you’ll get well done”

“Fuck you!” She said playfully, giving him a crude gesture “—Rare”

“What was that?” he asked “I didn’t quite catch that”

“RARE!” She cried, laughing “Rare, you asshole!”

Remus snickered to himself as he disappeared from the threshold, leaving Mia to roll her eyes into her tea mug. He loved nothing more than to poke fun at her newfound appreciation for rare (formerly called ‘fucking disgusting’) steaks.


	57. chapter 57

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year!

Sex was the _best_ right before a full moon— Mia loved how low Remus’s inhibitions were the day or so before his transformations. She relished in how he threw her around in bed like a rag doll, contorting her to his pleasure until they both finished in a mind-blowing climax. For years, he would try to stay away during this delicate time period, for fear his inhibitions would go out the window and he would sink his teeth into her and mark her for life. Now that she was indeed marked for life, both legs thrown over his shoulders, her knuckles white from gripping the iron headboard, and his teeth grazing her mark, collarbone and shoulder, she was certain sex near the full moon had gotten ten times better.

She panted heavily as she came down from her high, legs twitching with the aftermath of her climax. She was beginning to grow sore from their marathon sex session, but she wasn’t complaining— she would be completely happy to spend the rest of her days in this bed, allowing him to take her however and whenever he pleased.

“I need to teach you some of the sealing enchantments for the cellar” He murmured, trailing his tongue from her hipbone to her breast. A soft moan escaped her lips as he sucked on her nipple gently, flicking her sensitive skin with the tip of his tongue.

“You could just stay here in this room,” She offered “with your potion, you won’t hurt us”

He broke contact with her breast and rose, so that he was on his knees next to her. He frowned, shaking his head.

“I won’t gamble with them here,” He said, gesturing to the wall that their bedroom shared with theirs “I need to be in the cellar for the transformation.”

“Then let me stay with you— I became an Animagus for this reason.”

“No, you need to stay with them.”

“Penelope has a wand, and Eric has more guns than he knows what to do with— they will be fine for 12 hours.”

He seemed to chew on the words he wished to speak as the conversation paused. After a moment, he simply nodded and patted her thigh gently. “Roll over—”

She flipped onto her stomach, folding her arms under her head and resting her cheek in the crook of her elbow. He ran his hands over her lower back, circling her muscles with his thumbs. She grimaced as he found a tight muscle; he shifted his hands and concentrated on the sore spot, chuckling softly. 

“I’ve put you through the ringer today,” he purred “But I just can’t seem to get enough of you…”

“I’m not complaining,” she laughed “not in the _slightest._ ”

She allowed him to rub her for a few minutes, sighing in relief as his thumbs stripped parallel with her spine. His fingertips brushed the sides of her breasts as he worked up near her shoulder blades, sending a ping of desire to her core. He took his time, seeming to enjoy the act of massaging her as much as she enjoyed receiving— she would repay him with a back massage and a happy ending after this full moon cycle. His hands trailed back down to her hips, but rather than massage innocently like he had been, he gripped her hipbones and pulled her butt up into the air. 

“You ready to go again?” he asked

The moment she agreed, he pushed into her firmly, his grip tightening on her hips as he pounded in and out of her. It was sex marathons like these that Mia was overly thankful for magic— namely, silencing charms— so their moans and cries would die inside the bedroom with them.

* * *

Their night in cellar was peaceful, most of it spent resting after Mia hearing the horrible sound of bones stretching and cartilage snapping as she watched her husband transform into the wolf he despised. She spent the night in her own wolf form, licking his fur and nuzzling into him as they curled up like a yin-yang.

At daybreak, Penelope had prepared a breakfast spread for the four of them, the scent of oats and pancakes hitting their noses as they hobbled in the front door. Mia helped Remus into the armchair and massaged his aching shoulders, as Penelope delivered him a tray with piping hot coffee, and a large bowl of oatmeal topped with raisins and walnuts. He ate as if he had never seen a proper meal in his entire life; woofing his bowl down in record time.

“Pancakes?” Mia asked

“Please—“he said “I’m starving”

She served him a few blueberry pancakes drizzled in syrup, which he ate just as quickly. Mia settled herself on the couch next to him, giggling as she sipped her coffee and watched him devour more and more food.

“Best kept werewolf in town” he teased, winking at her.

Over the next few weeks, life seemed to normalize for the four of them. It seemed as all had accepted that this ramshackle cottage could become their home for the foreseeable future, and had started divvying responsibilities of chores around the house and cooking meals. They spent afternoons dueling and kayaking on the lake, and evenings playing cards or learning how to shoot hand guns with Eric’s instruction. Remus had proven to have quite the aim, hitting his target spot on almost every time. Penelope, on the other hand, had terrible aim and couldn’t hit her target— not even once. (“I’m much better with a wand, I swear…”)

Four days before the polyjuice potion was due to finish, they were greeted by Lionel’s loud call as he flew in the front window and landed on his perch. Frankie hooted happily, rattling around in his cage in excitement that the tawny owl had returned from his trek.

“Lionel!” Mia cried “Welcome back, you got what we need?”

Lionel hooted, lifting a leg that a small pouch was tied to. Mia untied it, and handed both him and Frankie a biscuit treat.

“You need some water?” she asked the owl, then turned back behind her “Eric— bring him a small bowl of water, please”

Eric obliged, watching the owl curiously as he drank the entire bowl. Mia tore open the pouch; inside was a Ziploc bag containing a lock of Ashley’s blonde hair, her passport, and a small sticky note.

> _Lay off the shrooms, weirdo— whatever the hell you’re doing with my passport, don’t lose it. You owe me, by the way._
> 
> _Smart bird, I’d like to know how you trained it._

Mia handed Eric the sticky note; he laughed as he read it, then rolled his eyes and shoved it into his pocket. “So, she sent everything she was supposed to?”

“Yes— we’re all set with the potion, it just needs to brew another 4 days.” Mia said “What’s our plan to get you two on a plane?”

“Well, we’ll get ‘Ashley’ and me tickets after we get to the airport…” Eric began “We’ll drive, and I’ll leave the keys in the jeep and call Kyle to come get it—“ he stopped and gestured to Mia and Remus “unless you guys want it…?"

Remus shook his head “We’ll do better traveling by apparition.”

“How long does this polyjuice stuff last?” Eric asked

“About 12 hours,” Mia said “well, 10-12— depending on how well I brewed it.”

“I’m sure you did a fine job,” Remus said, kissing her forehead “you were always exceptional at potions.”

“That should be long enough for us to get tickets and get through security before I change back,” Penelope nodded, interlacing her fingers with Eric’s. “You guys can still come with us,” she added “I hate leaving you…”

“we have to stay,” Remus said with a sigh “We swore when we joined the Order of the Phoenix that we would do whatever it took to fight Voldemort and his supporters.”

Immediately after Remus finished speaking, Mia’s heart dropped. She and Remus’s identical thin gold bracelets had started to vibrate. They locked eyes, their brows furrowing as they held up their wrists to each other. Curses blasted through the windows, shattering the glass all around them. Mia started throwing up shield after shield, screaming “WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!” She couldn’t see anything; it was pure chaos blasting around them.

“Mia!” Remus yelled over the commotion “Mia— HIDE!”

She ducked behind the couch, the edges of her vision starting to blur as her breathing increased. In this moment, she felt like that scared 4 year old girl, hiding behind the couch of her family’s living room. She closed her eyes, her mind transported back to the memory of Susan and Dolohov shooting curses at each other as Mia had curled herself into a ball and covered her ears.

“Eric, get back!” Penelope screamed. “Into the bedroom!

The front door burst open; Mia saw Remus fly backwards past the couch, landing on his back and skidding against the hardwood floor and knocking over a dining room chair. She let out a fearful squeak as the commotion died down, and heavy footsteps shook the weak, weathered floor.

“Well well well— look who broke the taboo...” A familiar raspy voice said “Excellent— you’re worth a lot of gold these days, Remus.”

There had to be more than one intruder, based on the amount of footsteps Mia could hear from her hiding spot. Remus groaned, sitting up and glancing ever so quickly at Mia behind the couch, paralyzed by fear and wide eyed. She knew the raspy voice all too well, and despite the scar that she now bared in the crook of her neck, she was still afraid.

“What taboo?” Remus demanded

“The Dark Lord’s name, of course. You Order of the Phoenix are the only ones brave enough to say his name.” Fenrir Greyback said smugly 

Remus clutched his side, wincing in pain then letting out a labored sigh. Mia realized his error in speaking Voldemort’s name had given away their location, leading Fenrir straight to them. Fenrir’s footsteps sounded like they were getting closer, then coming into her view as he stood over Remus.

“Where is she?” he asked “Where’d you hide her?”

“She’s not here— it’s just me,” Remus said “I’m alone.”

“Liar—“ Fenrir pushed the toe of his boot into Remus’s side, laughing menacingly as he let out hiss in pain. Mia covered her mouth to muffle her rapid, panicked breathing. “I can smell her. I can’t believe you _actually_ had the balls to mark her— come on out, princess! Come out come out wherever you are…”

Remus twitched his head ever so slightly, telling her to remain put. Fenrir noticed this— he shot ropes from the end of his wand that bound Remus tightly, and then began inspecting the area Remus’s attention had been focused on. She wished she had cast a disillusionment charm on herself, because the moment Fenrir laid eyes on her, the sinister grin that crept over his face made her stomach roll in fear.

“Boys, get her out from there!” he ordered “I can’t touch her.”

Two wizards emerged, one grasping her ankle and yanking her out from behind the couch as she began shouting expletives at them. The other one ripped her wand from her, tucking it into the waistband of his filthy trousers. Black ropes shot from Fenrir’s wand and bound Mia’s wrists and ankles, just like Remus.

“He should’ve turned you if he was going through the trouble to mark you,” Fenrir said, stepping as close to her as the mating curse would allow him. “You both could’ve joined my pack.”

“Eat shit!” she growled, “We would _never_ join your pack.”

Fenrir smiled menacingly, and then flared his nostrils, looking around and sniffing “I smell others, where are your friends?”

“It’s just us!” Mia said, struggling against her binds.

“Liars, both of you” he laughed “You think I’m stupid?”

They began searching the cottage, Mia praying that Penelope had the sense to have apparated away with Eric. She didn’t. After a few minutes, Fenrir’s cronies were dragging them out of the bedroom bound at the wrist and ankles, throwing them onto the floor next to Mia and Remus.

“Well, looks like today is going to be a fabulous payday,” he rasped “1000 galleons for each of you— except blondie here, who might you be?” Eric opened his mouth to speak, but Penelope shook her head for him to be quiet. Fenrir laughed “You mute, boy?” he growled “what’s your name? Just wondering if you’re on my little list here…”

Mia’s heart was racing, struggling against the binds of her ropes as she wracked her brain for a plan. She looked at Remus, gritting his teeth and undoubtedly trying to think of the same thing. Their polyjuice had 4 days still until it was ready, and if Fenrir and his cronies took them to the Ministry, they would all be withering away inside a cell in Azkaban well before then.

_You can release these ropes; you don’t need your wand._

Certainly getting out of the binds would be the easy part. It was dueling, namely shielding afterwards that was what made her nervous. Their practice sessions had been going extremely well, but she prayed she could produce the same quality protego charm under pressure as she had been in a controlled place. She had to at least try, it would be better than being a sitting duck.

“Alright boys, let’s take ‘em in!” Fenrir clapped his filthy hands together eagerly “Best payday yet…”

“Greyback!” Mia hissed

He spun on his heel and raised a brow at her, the corners of his mouth upturning in the slightest as he squared his body threateningly.

“What’re you hollering about, princess?”

Remus looked at her like she were insane, and Penelope bugged her eyes at her. Mia exhaled quickly, her eyes darting between them before speaking.

“You overlooked one tiny detail.”

“And what’s that?”

Mia smirked. “I don’t need a wand.”

She flexed her hands, and all four of their ropes fell off. Mia sprung to her feet and began shooting hexes wildly, knocking back the two cronies. Fenrir sent a stun at her, sending her flying up and back, skidding across the dining room table and flying into the wall, banging her head hard. She struggled to stay conscious, the sounds of fighting and visions of chaos fell silent, and went black.

* * *

Mia woke to her bedroom spinning, as if she had drank half a bottle of firewhisky. Her throat was extremely dry, her mouth felt like she had swished with acetone. She turned to see Penelope next to her, reading a book with a tattered cover, lying on her stomach with her ankles crossed in the air, and Remus in an armchair next to the bed.

“Hey” She rasped.

“Hey,” Penelope said as she set her book down “how are you feeling?”

“Fine,” she lied “How are you guys?”

“Remus had a couple broken ribs, but I repaired them” Penelope said, “I wasn’t hurt.”

Mia nodded then noticed that Eric was absent from the bedroom. “And Eric?”

“He got scratched by Greyback—“ Remus began “His arm is shredded up, but he was brilliant today— held his own with this ‘taekwondo’ he always raves about…”

“Ohmygod” Mia breathed, sitting up quickly, and then regretting doing so from the wave of nausea that hit her. “Where is he? Is he ok?”

“He’s in our bedroom— he’s alright, but a fever has set in” Penelope said with a frown “Remus wants me to stay away from him until he could figure out the extent of his injury, just in case of contamination”

Mia chewed on that thought, until her heart dropped, realizing they were still in the cottage despite their intruder’s hours before “Where is Greyback? His men…?”

“We have them in the cellar…” Remus said, running a hand through his hair “I chained them up; we can’t move the polyjuice, so we’re keeping them down there until the potion is finished”

“So the polyjuice is ok?” she said, relieved.

“I stirred it a few hours ago— it looks good”

“Excellent.” Mia said “Think Eric will be strong enough to go by the time it’s done?”

“Should be, “ Remus said “He was sleeping last I checked— speaking of sleep,” Remus reached over Penelope and handed Mia a couple small vials of potions. “Drink these, you need more sleep.”

She didn’t argue— anything to not experience the splitting headache she was experiencing. She downed the vial greedily, allowing herself to slip into a dreamless, restful slumber.

* * *

Birds chirping woke Mia the next morning, and for a moment, she forgot the events of the day before. Her heart sank when she remembered their prisoners chained up in the cellar of the cottage, and Eric’s injury that she had yet to see herself. She hopped out of bed, thankful to no longer have a splitting headache or to be feeling nauseas, and threw on a pair of jeans and a tank top. She walked out into the kitchen as she tied her long hair up into a ponytail, happy to see Eric up and about, his right arm bandaged from elbow to shoulder and hanging in a sling. His face lit up when he saw her, flashing her a pearly white smile.

“Hey! Glad to see you’re awake. How ya feeling?” 

“You get scratched by a werewolf and you’re asking me how _I_ feel?” she laughed “I’m fine— how are you…?”

“I’m alright, just earned some battle wounds.” Eric said casually “Penelope has been taking excellent care of me this morning.”

“I don’t think he is a contamination risk, but we may have another rare steak eater in our midst,” Remus called from the kitchen playfully 

“Breakfast is ready!” Penelope announced, “French toast!”

Eric and Penelope made their plates eagerly as Mia poured herself a cup of coffee. She furrowed her brow at Remus when she noticed he wasn’t making his plate, but staring at the food contemplatively.

“What’s up?” she asked

“I was just thinking we should probably feed our guests,” he said flatly

“Let them starve!” Eric called from the table, mouthful of French toast. “The human body can survive weeks without food, anyway”

“As someone who knows what it feels like to starve, I can’t do that in good conscience to another person— no matter how vile they are.” Remus slapped together three sloppy peanut butter sandwiches, carelessly flopping them onto a few disposable plates. “I’ll go take these to them— I’ll be back.”

“Here, let me” Mia offered, outstretching her hand “You shouldn’t go down there with your wand, in case they pull something tricky.”

“I’ll leave it up here…”

“No, I don’t like you going down there without one.” She said firmly “I don’t need a wand, so I’ll go”

“Are you sure…?” Remus asked slowly “You don’t have to go down there, I know you don’t want to be around him…”

“He can’t touch me.” She said dismissively “I’ll be back in just a minute.”

She made her way outside and around the cottage to the cellar stairs, the plates of the poorly made sandwiches levitating behind her. She pitter-pattered down the stairs, her stomach flip-flopping as Fenrir and his two cronies turned their attention to her.

“Food!” 

Mia waved her hand, and the sandwich plates settled onto the ground just in front of the three men. The two unfamiliar, dirty men dove for their plates, scarfing their sandwiches hungrily, but Fenrir didn’t even blink at the sight of food. He kept his eyes on Mia, observing her, his gaze stalking her. The coldness in his eyes sent a shiver down her spine. _You hold all the power, Mia. He cannot touch you._

“Food.” She repeated.

She gestured to the plate in front of Fenrir, with no response. He continued to stare at her, as if he were sizing her up, deciding her worth. 

“Eat it or don’t eat it— I really don’t give a shit” 

She turned to retreat back up the stairs; however she stopped when she heard him finally speak.

“I’m surprised he actually did it” Fenrir rasped “Remus, I mean. Always took him as a coward— never thought he’d have the stones to actually mark you.”

“You thought you’d get to do it instead?” She stepped back towards him, brow furrowing and eyes narrowing “that I’d be your little pet she-wolf that you could dangle in front of him?”

“Well, I was hoping,” he flashed her a carnivorous grin, her stomach lurching “a tight little ass like yours—“ he whistled “bet you would’ve been worth all the trouble. I should’ve taken you that night in Knockturn Alley— sunk my teeth into you and made you mine.”

“You’re disgusting!” she spat.

Fenrir laughed menacingly, sending a chill down her spine. “Tell me, Mia— does he think of me when he runs his hands along those pretty scars I gave you?”

She gritted her teeth, her nostrils flaring as she glared at him in revulsion.

“Do you think of me?”

Mia’s hands instinctively brushed the front of her thighs— of course she thought of him. She was haunted by his terrible smile; the feeling of him slicing through her skin was still vivid in her mind. He probably would’ve loved to know that he was her boggart. 

“Eat your sandwich.” she growled, turning away from him.

“I’ll take that as a yes” he said with a smug expression, leaning back against the cinderblock wall.

“What is it that you want me to say? That I think about you slicing me open every time I look at myself in the damn mirror?— or that I have nightmares about you forcing my pants off as you soaked my clothes in blood?”

“Oh, you dream of me too— I’m flattered”

“You are vile, you know that?” she spat, rounding on him “you are a disgrace, to humans and werewolves alike! You are a sick and twisted bastard that deserves to go six feet underground— it’s no wonder werewolves have a bad rap, because of wolves like you”

Fenrir sat up stiffly, his eyes flashing at her as he bared his pointed, fang-like teeth. “Careful what you say, Princess…” he warned.

“Eat shit, Greyback!— I hope someone puts you down like the animal that you are!”

“You know what, Mia, you might be safe from me with that little chunk taken out of your neck…” he growled, rising from his seated position “but Remus isn’t. Your mother isn’t. What about that curly haired girl upstairs— Penelope, was it?”

The two cronies in the cellar slunk back away from Fenrir, looking fearful as their eyes darted between him and Mia. Mia took a shuddering breath, “You wouldn’t _dare_ ” she said quietly.

“Oh, but I would.” He said with a menacing laugh “First, I’d string little miss Penelope up by her wrists and show her what I never got to show you. I wouldn’t mark her though— no, I’d share her with the rest of my pack, let them all get a feel for her,” 

Mia’s chin quivered as she dug her nails into her palms, her anger rising. 

“Then, your mother; what shall I do with her? Maybe Dolohov and I could come up with something together— he’s great with ideas” Fenrir smiled terribly “Wouldn’t you like to hear your dear mummy scream for mercy, just like dear old dad?”

“Fuck you!” she spat.

“Then Remus, oh Remus— what ever will I do with him…”

“I’ll kill you— I’ll kill you if you lay a hand on him!”

“No you won’t, your side doesn’t kill.” He said simply “bunch of pussies, if you ask me”

“Mia?” Remus’s voice came from the top of the stairs, his footsteps thundering as he came down into the cellar.

“Oh Remus, nice of you to join our conversation, we were just talking about you” Fenrir’s eyes flickered at Remus dangerously.

Remus grabbed Mia’s arm firmly, looking between Fenrir and her. “Why are you talking to him?” he snapped “upstairs, _now!_ ”

“We’ll chat later, princess” Fenrir purred smugly.

“No you won’t” Remus growled, rounding on him. “You stay away from her— don’t talk to her, don’t look at her— don’t even think about her”

“She’s the one who came down here;” Fenrir shrugged his shoulders “I just was being polite”

“You know that’s not what you were doing, Greyback— I know what game you play,” Remus noticed Mia still lingering on the stairs, now rounding on her “ _upstairs!_ ”

He grabbed the base of her neck and pulled her up the cellar stairs. They retreated into the house in silence, she slunk down on the couch as Remus began to pace in front of her.

“What the hell were you doing down there talking to him?” he said angrily “what good could possibly come from that?”

“I just delivered their food,” she muttered “and then I got angry”

“Because he pushed you— what did you say to him?”

“Nothing” she said dismissively

“What did you say to him?” Remus said again, slowly.

“I told him he was a vile animal who deserved to be put down, basically” she said, picking at her fingernails “I lost my temper”

“You lost your temper.” He said flatly

“Yeah, then he threatened you, mum and Penelope”

“He will make good on that one day, you realize that?” Remus said quietly, his tone sharp and dangerous. “Do I need to remind you what happens when people lose their temper in front of Fenrir Greyback?”

“Remus—“

“Let me remind you!” he snapped, unbuttoning his shirt hastily “Because you seem to forget, My father lost his temper once in front of that savage, and _this_ was the result!” 

Remus was shouting now, pulling his button down off his shoulder to display his violent scar. Mia let out a few tears as she turned her eyes away from him.

“Look at me,” He snarled. She didn’t oblige. “LOOK AT ME!”

He grabbed her jaw and forced her to look at him. Mia slunk back into the couch; had his grip not been so tight on chin, it would be quivering. 

“Once a month for thirty two years, I have paid for my father losing his temper. Who is going to pay for yours?”

Tears now streamed down her face “I’m sorry!” she squeaked.

“Oh, you’re sorry?” he scoffed “now you’re sorry, _after_ the damage is done? My father was sorry. He cried himself sick he was so goddamn _sorry!_ ”

“Hey, man— lighten up!” Eric interjected.

“You,” Remus pointed a finger at him “are not a part of this conversation.”

“I’m sorry! I wasn’t thinking!” Mia cried “I just got mad and it came out!”

“Tell that to Penelope when he has his way with her! Tell that to your mother when he feasts on her flesh for dinner!”

“Stop!” she sobbed, throwing her face in her hands

“You need to think before you speak!” he snapped “that mouth of yours continuously gets you in trouble,” He shook his head, muttering under his breath before speaking again. “Not only will he add you to his list of people to fuck over, but just because he can’t touch you doesn’t mean he can’t get Dolohov or another Death Eater to do it for him! You want someone else to tie you to a chair and slide their hands up your skirt?”

“SHUT UP!” she screamed, tears spilling all down her face “Shut up shut up _shut up!_ ”

“I can’t deal with this right now,” he gruffed, re-buttoning his shirt. “I thought you were smarter than this, I thought you knew better.” He stormed off into the bedroom, slamming the door shut. The lock plinked, despite their ability to simply cast _Alohomora_ to unlock the door, Remus still chose this primitive device to make a statement.

“Remus!” Mia sobbed, “Remus— please!”

Remus did not reemerge from the bedroom. Mia’s chest was tight, her body was wracking with sobs— she needed fresh air. She needed to get away from here. She sprung up from the couch, running to the front door and flinging it open.

“Mia? Mia, where are you going?!” Penelope called after her.

She didn’t answer, sprinting out the door and down the front steps. Once she was a few paces away from the cottage, she leapt into the air, transforming into the white wolf. She ran at top speed into the forest, her paws thundering on the earth below her as the wind rushed through her fur. She ran until her stamina taped out, then transformed back into herself and curled up knees to chest onto the forest floor, sobbing once more.

* * *

Mia returned to the cottage just before sundown, having leisurely walked back through the woods instead of sprinting like she had earlier that day. She stepped inside quietly and made her way back into the bedroom, where she found Remus sitting on the bed with both Penelope and Eric. 

“Jesus, Mia!” Penelope snapped, flushing angrily “You had us worried sick!”

“Sorry…” she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest protectively.

Eric remained silent, eyeing Penelope as she began lecturing. “What you did was irrespon—“

“Penelope!” Remus interjected, not unkindly “Eric— may I speak to my wife? Alone, please.”

His voice was deeper, raspier, as if he had cried himself dry like she did. Penelope let out a defeated huff, shooting a glance at Mia before exiting the room, Eric shuffling behind her. Once they were alone, Mia braced for Remus to scold her about leaving being reckless and irresponsible, but the lecture never came. He sighed, looking at her as if speaking physically pained him.

“I lost my temper.” He said softly.

“Yeah,” she scoffed. “You did.”

They paused, not meeting each other’s eyes.

“The whole time I was berating you for losing your temper, when that was exactly what I was doing,” he shook his head “I was a hypocrite.”

“You weren’t wrong,” she said quietly, picking at her fingernails “my mouth has always gotten me in trouble.”

Remus paused, seeming to contemplate what to say next. After a moment, “We’ll wipe his memory. I’ve been thinking about it all day— honestly whether you spoke with him or not it is the smart thing to do”

“Do we have to leave?” she asked “If we wipe their memory, maybe we could stay…”

“We may be able to, but honestly, I don’t want to take the risk. We need to leave after we finish the polyjuice potion— move somewhere more secure.”

Mia nodded, picking her nail so hard she re-opened a previous sore. She hated how complicated everything had become— being on the run, yet needing to stay close in case the Order needed something. She craved stability, ease, where their only worries would be what color to paint their living room or what to cook for dinner. She wondered if they could have that if they walked away, left the country and never looked back.

“Maybe we could go to America with Penny and Eric,” she said quietly “Get away from all this bullshit.”

Remus sighed, patting the bed for her to sit next to him. She obliged. “Is that what you want?”

She wasn’t expecting him to ask her that— she was expecting him to shut down the thought immediately. _Yes, it’s what I want. Take me away from here, to where we can live happily._ “We made a promise to fight this out, until the end…”

“Mia—“ Remus said, taking her hand “If you want to go to the states, then we will go to the states. I will do whatever it is you want to do.”

Mia had no tears left to cry, but a lump formed in her throat, choking her. _Yes, Remus. Let’s go. Let’s go so we can grow old together peacefully._ Despite her mind screaming yes, she shook her head. “We need to stay in the country, the Order needs us.” She said softly

“Alright” He nodded “You hungry? I can make you something.”

“Just tea, please”

He kissed her forehead and exited the room. Once he was gone, Mia threw a pillow across the room, letting out a frustrated groan. She wanted nothing more than to say yes. Why couldn’t she bring herself to have just simply said yes?


	58. chapter 58

“This spaghetti is good, Remus,” Penelope said “Thank you.”

These words spoken were some of the only words said during dinner on their last night together at the cottage. The polyjuice was due to finish the next morning, and everyone seemed somber about the idea of the four of them after tomorrow would not be together.

“Boxed pasta and jarred sauce,” Remus said with a small smile “a real delicacy.”

The next few minutes were filled only with the sound of chewing and forks clanking, each one of them occasionally looking up from their meal and meeting eyes with another. This seemed all too much for Penelope; she set her fork down and started sobbing into her palms.

“I don’t want to go without you guys,” Penelope blubbered, gesturing to Remus then to Mia. “Please— come with us. We’ll find more hair— we’ll get more passports…”

_Say yes, Mia. Say yes and you can escape all this._

“We can’t go, we can’t leave the Order…” she muttered softly

“But we’ve become like family...” Penelope sniffed

It was true, over the last month the four of them had grown extremely close. Mia had always thought her, Remus and Penelope had been a tight niche from living at the flat, but there was something about the four of them spending nearly every waking moment (as well as going through a crisis) together that brought camaraderie. Even Remus and Eric elected to stay up some nights later than the girls, drinking scotch and sharing ‘war stories’— something that Mia never expected the two men to ever do together.

“This isn’t goodbye forever,” Remus interjected “Just goodbye for a little while.”

Penelope nodded stiffly, then pushed her mostly eaten plate to the middle of the table and rose. “I’m going to go finish packing.”

The table watched as she walked out of the dining room and disappeared around the corner. When they heard the bedroom door shut, Eric let out a sigh, frowning. “She was a mess last night also— cried all night.”

“I’m glad you two will be heading somewhere safe,” Remus said “But we will certainly miss having both of you around.”

Eric chuckled, taking a bite of pasta and winking at Remus “We’ve come a long way over the last year, haven’t we?” he said, gesturing to him with his fork.

Remus smirked, leaning back in his chair and folding his arms over his stomach “yeah, I guess we have.”

“It’s too bad you guys aren’t coming with us,” Eric said through a mouthful, swallowing and taking a drink of water before continuing “I would love to take you guys to a Reds game— baseball, of course. It’s America’s favorite past time— sometimes, the stadium sells hotdogs for 10 cents…”

As much as a baseball game seemed lovely, Mia didn’t want to hear about it. She didn’t want to hear about all the things she could be doing— and enjoying— if she had just had the sense to speak up and tell Remus she wanted to leave too. She had made a promise to the Order, so did Remus. This war was worth dying for, the cause worth dying for— but did they _actually_ have to die? Could the Lupin’s really make that much of a difference at this point in the war that they needed to wait around for word to go on a mission that may kill them both in the process? Dumbledore was dead. Voldemort had taken over the Ministry. What more could the Order of the Phoenix feasibly do?

Maybe she was being selfish— a coward. How disappointed would Sirius be to know she was considering running away from the organization that he had given his life to (and life for)? How would her mother feel to know she would back out of something she had fought to be a part of? Remus said if she wanted to go to America, he would take her, but would he judge and resent her for it? Was it a crime to wish for peace? To curl up at night with her husband and not have some shred of fear in her that if shit hit the fan, it could be the last night they spent together? She couldn’t listen to Eric’s chatter about baseball games or his favorite restaurants any longer. She rose from the table, pushing her plate inward as Penelope had.

“I’m going to go help Penelope.” She interjected.

Eric had stopped talking abruptly, but before either he or Remus could say anything, Mia was already half way to the second bedroom. She opened the door without knocking, finding Penelope sitting on the bed, tears running down her face as she was looking at a small object. Penelope looked up suddenly, hastily tucking the object behind her back and shifting to cover it clumsily.

“Hey, what’re you up—”

“What is that?” Mia asked curiously “Behind your back?”

“Nothing,” Penelope said quickly “nothing.”

“If it were nothing, why did you hide it? Give it here!”

Mia wrestled with Penelope as she squawked in protest. (“Mia, stop! STOP!” “Give it here! Let me see!”). Mia ripped the small item out of Penelope’s firm grasp, leaping up and across the room to avoid losing ahold of it as Penelope lunged after her.

“Be careful!” Penelope cried “Don’t crack the face!”

Mia held the item up to eye level— it was a watch with a black leather band and a smooth silver casing. At the base of the watch was stamped the letter’s S.B.

“This looks like Sirius’s old watch…” She said, furrowing her brow “S.B… Penny— is this actually his?”

Penelope nodded, looking down at the ground and sniffing.

“You’ve had his watch, and you never said anything about it?”

Her temper began to rise; how could Penelope have not mentioned this to her? How could she have kept the fact that she possessed such an important item a secret? Not only that, but what was Penelope doing with his watch in the first place?

“How long have you had this?!” Mia hissed “How long have you had this and didn’t tell me?!”

“He gave it to me—“ she whispered “after the party at our flat…”

“Why on earth would he give it to _you?_ ”

“Because you weren’t the only one who he cared about, Mia!” Penelope snapped “He gave it to me because he wanted me to have it!”

“Ohmygod…” Mia said under her breath, setting the watch down gently on the dresser next to her “Were you in love with him? Was he in love with you?”

“I’ve told you— we weren’t really at that point.” She said “but we cared about each other, and we were there for each other in a difficult spot in our lives. That’s why he gave it to me, as a thank you for being there.”

“I can’t believe you never told me!” Mia cried “how could you keep that from me?!”

“Everything ok in here?” Eric appeared in the doorway with Remus, an entire head taller, towering behind him. “We heard yelling…”

“Oh, yeah, we’re just fine—“ Mia spat “I just figured out your girlfriend is a big fat liar, though— been lying to me for a long time!”

“I am not a liar! I did not lie to you!” Penelope cried “I just didn’t tell you about the watch because I knew you’d be upset he gave it to me!”

“Ladies!” Eric hollered, holding his hands up “let’s not fight— come on, it’s our last night…”

“Yes, let’s not fight,” Mia said snottily. “Let’s also just ignore the fact that she’s had that watch for over a year and DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING!”

She pushed past Eric and Remus and stormed across the hall, entering her bedroom and slamming the door shut. She threw herself onto the bed and shoved her face into a pillow. She let out a series of angry screams into the pillow as Remus slipped inside the bedroom, shutting the door softly behind him.

“You don’t really want to pick a fight with Penny on your last night with her, do you?” Remus asked warily. When Mia didn’t answer, he sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose before speaking again. “Look, Sirius wanted her to—“

“Don’t talk out your ass, Remus— how would you know what he wanted?” 

Remus cleared his throat and shifted his weight uncomfortably, focusing his gaze on the floor in front of them.

“Wait— you _knew?_ ” Mia hissed “You knew she had it and you didn’t say _anything?!_ ”

“Because it wasn’t my place to say anything,” He said calmly “she told me about him giving it to her in confidence, and specifically asked me not to say anything.”

“You are my _husband!_ ” Mia cried “You are supposed to tell me everything!”

“Yes, However I care for Penelope very much— she is my friend,” Remus said sternly “and if she asks me to keep something between just her and me, I will honor that.”

“I can’t believe this,” she whispered, sinking back onto the bed. “This is such _bullshit!_ ”

Tears hit her like a ton of bricks. She grabbed the pillow she had screamed into and reburied her face, but this time crying. Her whole body wracked with sobs; Remus sat down next to her, rubbing her back gently as he shushed her.

“That is Sirius’s coming of age watch— from the Potter’s” she whined into the pillow “That watch meant everything to him.”

“I know— I recognized it,” He replied softly “But this outburst isn’t really about the watch, is it?”

She paused, still crying into the pillow. After a moment, “No, I don’t think so.”

“I think you should go back in there and talk to her,” he said “Don’t spend this night angry over something so trivial.”

Mia wiped her face onto her shirt and sniffled loudly. “I overreacted, didn’t I?”

“Yeah…” Remus let out a soft chuckle, smiling warmly at her “You are always quick to fly off the handle.”

“I’m going to miss her so much…”

“I know, I know.”

He rubbed her back for another few minutes until her tears had dried up, and then escorted her back to the second bedroom. This time, she sat down next to Penelope and hugged her, both of them burying their faces into each other’s necks as they sobbed. 

“I’m sorry,” Penelope whispered “I should’ve told you about the watch ages ago.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Mia said through a sob “I shouldn’t’ve overreacted.”

“Here, you want to look at it?”

Penelope handed Mia the watch; she immediately admired how well-crafted it was. The stitching on the leather band was immaculate, and upon closer inspection, she noticed the face contained a small Gryffindor crest just above the Roman numeral for 6.

“Why don’t you girls take this room tonight?” Eric offered “I’ll just crash on the couch.”

“You sure?” Penelope asked “Remus’s sofa is terrible…”

“It’s not that bad…” Remus muttered softly, mostly to himself.

“Yeah, you guys should get some time alone,” Eric stepped over to Penelope and kissed her softly “I’ll be alright out there for one night”

“Well, I could use some assistance with feeding our ‘guests’,” Remus said, miming air quotes around the word guests. “Eric, what do you say you and your hand gun accompany me to the cellar?”

“I’d be delighted,” Eric said “Can I shoot Greyback in the leg?”

Mia and Penelope giggled as the men bantered back and forth, listening to them arguing about shooting their hostages or not. (“What about in the shoulder? I’ll avoid any arteries!” “NO.” “Then what’s the point of going in armed?! Come on, let me get just one shot in…”) When the girl’s laughter subsided, an awkward pause fell between them. Mia began picking at her fingernails anxiously.

“I’m sad you are leaving tomorrow.” She said softly

“Expressing your feelings,” Penelope winked “Good work.”

“Shut up!”

The girls broke into easy laughter once more, hitting each other with the bed pillows as they jeered back and forth. They spent the rest of the evening just the two of them, eating the rest of the candy they had stowed away and reminiscing on old over memories of their days at school and life at the flat until they both fell asleep, sprawled out over the bed on top of the empty wrappers.

* * *

“Alright, you have everything?”

Eric and Penelope joined hands and nodded to each other, then to Mia. “We should— I triple checked,” Penelope said “What about you guys? Have enough canned food and supplies packed?”

“I think so,” Mia said “We’ll have to ration our food, but we should have enough to last a few months.”

“Penelope, you should drink the polyjuice now— just in case you run into anything on your way to the airport,” Remus said ”And then drink some when you get there to prolong your time.”

Penelope nodded, scooping some of the thick viscous potion into a cup. She added a couple of Ashley’s hairs and stirred; the potion turned a shimmering blush pink, and wafted a pleasant sweet almond scent. Mia watched the potion swirling in the cup from over Penelope’s shoulders in amazement.

“Harry’s hair turned the polyjuice gold,” she said, amused “I fucking _love_ potions…”

Penelope downed the polyjuice potion in a few gulps; before their eyes, her features morphed into the face that matched the picture on her borrowed passport. Ashley resembled Eric very much so; flaxen hair and a strong jaw line. She was shorter than Penelope, but much larger chested— the buttons on her blouse were now pulling apart as the material stretched over her breasts. Eric goggled at her, reaching an uncertain hand up to her cheek. He touched her face and hair with slight hesitation, moving slowly.

“Holy shit, you look just like my sister…”

“Well, for the next few hours, I am your sister” Penelope laughed

“WHOA! You even sound like her,” Eric said breathlessly “So fucking cool…” He looked at his wrist watch “We should get going, it’s an hour drive to the airport from here— what are you guys going to do?”

“I’m going to set a time release on the chains in the cellar, and wipe their memories,” Remus said “once the chains release, Mia and I will be long gone.”

Penelope threw her arms around Mia, hugging her tightly. “I love you.”

“I love you,” Mia replied “Can you do me a favor?”

“Anything, what do you need?”

“Watch over Lionel. I’m going to send him to America to stay with you for a while. I don’t think it’s safe for us to keep an owl around, and I’m sure he’d be happier with Frankie.”

“Of course,” Penelope said “I’ll take good care of him.”

Remus and Eric shook hands, giving each other an understanding nod. Mia then wrapped her arms around Eric, squeezing tightly “Take care of her for me— she knows you love her, right?”

“Of course she knows,” Eric said “We said it the other night, not that it wasn’t obvious— I’m essentially giving up my life for her.”

“You don’t regret any of this, do you?” Mia asked “Going on the run with us, I mean.”

“No,” Eric pulled away and grinned at her, flashing his pearly white teeth. “Not a single thing.”

They broke their embrace and finished their goodbyes; Mia fought the annoying stinging of tears as she watched Penelope and Eric climb into the Jeep. After he started the ignition, Eric poked his head out the window, giving them a two-fingered salute.

“You guys be careful. Just so you know, my invitation still stands— if anything goes to shit, you are welcome in Cincinnati with us.”

“We’ll keep that in mind,” Remus said as both he and Mia waved. “Drive safe.”

Remus wrapped an arm around Mia’s waist, holding her tight as they watched them drive away, listening to the crunching gravel and soft engine hum grow softer and softer, until they could no longer be heard.

“You alright?” Remus asked softly

“Yeah,” she replied, albeit she was unsure if this were true. “Let’s get ready to go.”

“Alright, you lock up the house— I’ll go deal with the cellar vermin.”

Mia covered all the furniture in the cottage, and sent Lionel off to America through the window, trying her hardest not to cry as she watched her beloved tawny owl grow smaller and smaller against the horizon until he disappeared from view.

_This isn’t goodbye forever, just goodbye for a little while._

She locked up the house with the strongest locking charms that she could conjure, and then sunk down onto the rotting wood stoop outside. She sat her small velvet pouch next to her, sneakily concealing all their camping supplies and belongings that would hopefully carry them through the next indeterminate time period. After a few minutes, Remus emerged from the cellar.

“The chains will release in an hour, and I erased about a week’s worth of memories from all three— just to be safe.” He said, clasping his hands together. “You ready to go? House is locked up?”

She nodded and stood up, gripping her velvet pouch tightly as she wrapped her arms around him. After a moment of uncomfortable compression from apparition, her feet hit the ground and fresh air filled her lungs. They were now standing in a clearing next to a small pond, surrounded by a million trees beginning to turn to their autumn color. This spot was quiet, beautiful; the only sound around them was leaves rustling and birds chirping pleasantly. She did a full 360 rotation of their surroundings— it was a place she did not recognize.

“Where are we?”

“Somewhere in the Forest of Dean,” Remus replied “Start putting up some enchantments— give us a decent amount of space for a fire and the tent. I’ll start unpacking.”

She obliged, muttering various incantations to deflect dark magic, repel muggles, and make them invisible to anyone who was not either of them. Remus had the tent set up in a matter of minutes, eager to show her the amenities Cepheus Gamal typically enjoyed on his camping excursions.

The tent on the outside was small, only encompassing a 4x4 area. Once ducking through the entrance, the inside was much larger, featuring a central furnished living area and kitchenette, and two bedrooms, one on either side of the living space. The tent felt as if they had stepped into someone else’s home, the strong scent of frankincense made it seem foreign— like this wasn’t home. The aroma was ingrained into the fabric of the furniture and canvas tarp— this particular scent she didn’t typically gravitate towards, but wasn’t offended by it either. The tent lacked no amenities for comfortable camping, other than an absence of indoor plumbing that she would surely miss.

“Well, this would’ve at least been enough room if had Penny and Eric stayed with us,” Remus said “What do you think?”

Mia sighed as she looked around. Despite the comfort that they could live in with this tent, it still didn’t have the comfortable home-y feel that the cottage had. She wondered if it were the tent itself, or if it was still her resentment on not being able to admit that she wanted to leave the country with their friends for an easier, happier life.

“Looks like we’re going to be staying awhile,” she sighed “I guess let’s make ourselves at home.”


	59. chapter 59

Mia lay on the mattress on her stomach, ankles crossed and feet up in the air. Her long dark hair was neatly French braided into two pigtails secured at the ends with twine. Her face was much thinner than it had been the few months earlier, thanks to her meals rationed to a can of beans, corn or potatoes once a day. Her clothes hung off of her thin frame, her collarbones jutted out more like they had during the various ‘fasting from grief’ periods in her lifetime.

It was afternoons like these that she was glad she remembered to pack her photo album. In the mad rush to get out of the flat, she had almost forgotten it. She admired the album regularly, as reviewing pictures of happier times eased the loneliness she had grown to experience isolated in the woods. Despite their situation, Mia was at least thankful that she and Remus were together, and that she never grew tired of his company.

She flipped through the album pages, smiling at photographs of her and Remus by the lake at the cottage, photographs of her and Sirius making silly faces, and photographs of her and Penelope in the Ravenclaw dormitory at varying ages. She had finished the album with photographs of her, Remus, Penelope and Eric in their month at the cottage. All four of them would force big, happy smiles for the camera, but Mia could see (and remember) the anxiety and uncertainly behind their eyes in each photograph.

She reached over to her left, picking up a weathered postcard she had set off to the side. _Greetings from Cincinnati, Ohio,_ the card read— the word Cincinnati stylized with large bubble letters depicting various buildings and landmarks that she assumed were located around the city. The card had no note— only addressed to Remus and Amelia Lupin— and was delivered by an unfamiliar barn owl. She had jumped up and down in excitement upon the receipt of the faded post card, knowing very well it was Penelope’s way of letting them know that she and Eric had gotten to their destination safely. She wanted to write back, tell Penelope how much they missed her and Eric already, but Remus advised against it. They had argued for hours over it, but in the end, she knew he was right. They had no idea if the Ministry was intercepting owls, and it was dangerous enough that Penelope had put their names on the postcard to begin with.

“Hey,” Remus stepped inside the bedroom “Will you cut my hair? It’s falling in my eyes”

Mia wasn’t the only one affected by their limited diet; Remus had grown thin— his face was gaunt and his clothes baggy. Four months of canned starches had done neither of them any favors.

“Sure,” she replied “I’ll be out in a second.”

She folded up her photo album, tucking the postcard into one of pages and slipped it between the box spring and mattress of the bed. She stood, stretching for a moment until she caught eye of herself in the mirror. Her flannel hung on her like an oversized coat, and her jeans had at least an inch of give in the thighs and waist, compared to the skin tight fit they used to be. She sighed; she never did like herself this thin, it reminded her of darker times when she took food for granted, unable to eat she was too upset. Now, she’d give anything for the copious amounts of bacon and eggs Remus used to pile up and bribe her to eat.

“You made tea?” she asked as she emerged from the bedroom “Mint?”

“Yeah, we’re out of earl grey,” Remus pulled one of the rickety dining chairs from around the table and set it down in the middle of the kitchen. He sat down, then pulled his shirt off and tossed it off to the side “Remember, not too short.”

“Yes, yes, I know how you like it,” Mia said dismissively “Who are you trying to impress with a sharp haircut, anyway?”

“Well, there is this pain in the ass woman that I share a tent with…”

Mia rolled her eyes and giggled as she began to snip his hair gingerly. She took her time to ensure it was even— despite their isolation, Remus was still incredibly picky about his hair.

“There— you want me to wash it for you?” she asked, brushing loose chunks of hair off his shoulders, back and chest “it’ll be just like a barber shop.”

“Please— it’ll save me time in the pond later”

One of the downfalls of camping through the winter was bathing. The pond was as cold as ice—they could bathe in as little as thirty seconds if they didn’t wash their hair, but to wash their hair (especially Mia) prolonged their cold water exposure significantly.

Mia directed Remus to lie on the bed in the bedroom, placing a bucket at the edge of the mattress. He plopped down onto the bed with his head hanging over the side and overtop of the bucket. Mia conjured water and suds from her palms, and massaged his scalp as she scrubbed all the loose hairs from his hair.

“That’s some good head you’re giving there…”

“Shut up!” she laughed, smacking his shoulder playfully with a sudsy hand. The bucket underneath his head caught the run off as she rinsed his hair. With a wave of her hand, his hair was dry and slicked neatly back and out of his eyes. He sat up and looked at her, flashing a boyish grin.

“I think you got a bit of soap on your shirt, you should just take it off…”

Mia laughed as he grabbed her hand and pulled her close. “You just want to get me naked.”

He slid her oversized flannel off over her head, and reached around to unhook her bra. “I like you best that way.”

He spun her around and tossed her onto the bed with ease. He was able to pull her jeans down without unbuttoning them, for they were much larger now than they had been 4 months ago. His hands slid up her stomach to her breasts that fit perfectly in his palms. He took a few moments to place gentle kisses along her shoulder, collarbone and hollow of her throat as he kneaded her breasts, she sighing as his thumbs brushed over her nipples.

“Do you want to play a game?” he whispered huskily in her ear.

“A game?” she giggled “how are we supposed to play strip poker if you already got me naked?”

“No, no, something different,” he said with a smirk “we 69— first one to finish loses, and has to do whatever the winner wants in bed for a week.”

“ _Whatever_ they want in bed?” she asked, raising a brow “ _Anything?_ ”

“Well, as long as both parties are comfortable, of course,” he chuckled. “What do you say? Want to play?”

“You seem like you want to play this because you’re confident you’ll win…”

“I know I will win,” he said smugly “I have full confidence.”

“Alright, you’re on” she said “I plan on making you eat your words— I’m incredibly skilled at sucking cock, as you have informed me…”

She tugged roughly at his overly-tightened belt. Once his belt was undone; his pants nearly fell off him they had also grown so large. He plopped down on his back, and swung her leg over top of him, wiggling her hips up to his face. She gripped the base of his thick cock, ready to win his silly little game.

“Ready?” he asked, “on my count— one…two… three!”

She took him in her mouth as fast as she could, bobbing her head quickly as she swirled her tongue around his head.

_Bob faster, you can win this… shit, this feels good— he’s so good at this… NO I will not lose, suck harder suck harder!... goddamnit he is REALLY good at this… stroke his balls, yeah he likes that… there, that’ll really get him going… fuck, this feels too good… swirl your tongue some more, you’ve got this, you can win… ohmygod ohmygod I’m so close, don’t come don’t come!... think about owl post, potions, bread, ANYTHING… fuck, no no no, goddamnit, FUCK!…_

She broke contact with his cock and cried out as she came hard; her whole body went rigid as waves of pleasure rolled through her. He let out a smug, triumphant chuckle as he patted her butt cheek gently. 

“Fuck you,” she said breathlessly. She rolled off of him and onto her back, still panting. “Were you even close?”

“Oh, _so_ close,” he laughed “Once you started stroking my balls, I thought I was done for. Had you lasted a little bit longer, I probably would’ve lost.”

She sighed in defeat. “Alright, well, you win— what’ll you have me do?”

“What will I have you do?” the boyish grin returned to Remus’s face. “Well—first,” He sat up and positioned himself between her legs. “You—” He pushed his cock firmly into her, smirking as she gasped. “—are going to come for me again…”

* * *

Beans. She was really sick of beans. She unhappily, but hungrily, ate her can of beans doused in hot sauce, trying to pretend it was a taco bowl. Unfortunately, her imagination was unable to psyche herself out, and she continued to eat her can with contempt. She had her choice of corn or potatoes other than the beans, but she was just as tired of those.

“We need more food options,” she grumbled “I’m so sick of this; we’ve been eating the same three things for months.”

“We’re out of money, so even if we used to polyjuice to get to a store…”

“Yeah yeah yeah and I can’t make a bank withdrawal as someone else, I know” She said impatiently “We haven’t heard from the Order at all. We’ve literally been in isolation for months— not even a single owl or patronus, from any of them!”

Remus set his can down with the spoon inside, sighing heavily. “You are regretting not going to America, aren’t you?”

Mia sighed. “Yes. I am. I don’t know why I didn’t just say I wanted to then. The Order seems to be finished— how could they not have contacted us if there was still something that could be done?”

Remus’s shoulders rounded forward as he ran a hand through his hair, seeming to not know the answer to what she had asked. “I know our situation isn’t great, but—”

“Don’t feed me some bullshit about how we need to keep faith, please.” She interjected “I want out of this tent, I want to try to make contact with someone— anyone.”

Remus didn’t answer, but sighed heavily over his can of corn. They were silent for a moment before Mia spoke again.

“What about the cabin, where we spent our honeymoon? I know you said we were safer in the middle of the woods, but _technically_ the cabin is in the middle of the woods…”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, too many people had access to the location of it, and if a Death Eater tortured anyone about safe houses…”

“Then we’ll apparate the fuck out of there if it’s been compromised,” Mia clasped her hands together, pleading. “Come on, it has indoor plumbing! I’m _dying_ for a hot shower and a working toilet. If I have to freeze my tits off—“ She pointed in the direction that faced the adjacent pond “—in that pond to bathe one more time, I’m going to just drown myself.”

“ _Not funny._ ” Remus said sternly

“I’m kidding, obviously!” she said, rolling her eyes. “I want to go tomorrow. Maybe if we’re lucky other members of the Order will be staying there— and they’ll have more food than just beans.”

Remus shifted in his chair; Mia could tell he was contemplating— on the fence about whether or not obliging to her request would be put them at risk.

“We’d be able to use that Jacuzzi again…” she said with a slight sing-song inflection, stretching her leg under the table to rub her foot against his shin. “You can’t tell me you wouldn’t jump at the chance to get me naked in there again, could you?”

Remus’s tongue darted out to wet his lips as he fought back a smile. His cheeks turned pink as he laughed softly, nodding. “Alright, we’ll go— but if I see one thing I don’t like…”

* * *

The tent was stowed inside the small velvet pouch along with the rest of their supplies. It was incredibly cold today— the February wind bit at her cheeks as she wrapped herself tighter in her winter cloak. They had apparated to the clearing adjacent to the cabin, as to approach and inspect it and its surroundings on foot. There was more snow here than back in the Forest of Dean; Mia had cast impervious charms on both of their shoes to keep the snow’s moisture from seeping in. When they neared the cabin, they walked a perimeter first before attempting to enter.

“I think it’s clear,” Mia whispered “I can’t hear anything inside.”

“They could have a silencing charm up— get behind me.”

Remus and she tiptoed up to the cabin’s front door. He pointed his wand at the lock and whispered softly.

_“Alohomora”_

The lock did not budge. He motioned for her to step back further, and then pointed his wand at the lock yet again.

 _“Aberto”_ he whispered.

The lock splintered, allowing them to turn the knob and open the door. The cabin was still silent; Remus took Mia’s hand and they stepped through the threshold together. Upon stepping inside the foyer, before either of them could blink, a male voice shouted from seemingly nowhere.

“Stupefy!”

Both of them flew back out onto the porch, skidding on their backs. Mia stopped right at the edge of the porch stairs, but Remus went tumbling down, landing in the snow with a soft thud.

“Oh shit, sorry I didn’t realize it was you two!” Mia fought the pins and needles sensation and sat up, feeling immense relief to see it was only Fred Weasley standing in the threshold. He turned his head back over his shoulder and hollered inside the cabin. “Oi! It was just Remus and Mia!”

Fred extended his hand to help Mia stand, as George came bustling out to assist Remus. Once Remus was on his feet, he grabbed George by the collar and gritted his teeth.

“You shouldn’t let your guard down so quickly!— how do you know we aren’t Death Eaters using polyjuice??”

“Well, a Death Eater certainly wouldn’t say that...” George said with a shrug.

“No certainly not.” Fred agreed. “Come in— Lee is in the other room setting up the broadcast.”

“Lee? Lee Jordan?” Mia smiled— she hadn’t seen Lee Jordan since she graduated school. After a moment she realized she had no idea what Fred meant by broadcast. “Broadcast?” she asked, furrowing her brow.

“Yeah! Come on, you guys have been listening to Potterwatch, I’m sure” George said as he led them into the living room

The cabin looked exactly the way they had left it. Her heart panged as she looked around, remembering making love on the floor in front of the fireplace, and dancing to old records up and down the living room, laughing as Remus spun her around and around. She longed for that weekend back— life wasn’t simple back then, but at least she had hope for their side then, unlike she did now.

“No, we haven’t,” Remus said “Potterwatch?”

“Well, I’m certainly offended!” George scoffed playfully “We’ve been broadcasting the news— the real news, that is. You know, information about what’s been going on, missing people and deaths, as well as trying to reach out to Harry to let him know we all support him— Lee, look who the intruders were!”

“No way!” Lee cried, jumping up from his seat in front of a pile of radio equipment. “Hey, Mia— Professor Lupin.”

Remus beamed as he shook Lee’s hand; “You can call me Remus—” Remus said, trying hard to hide the sheepish smile threatening to creep across his face. “—you all are living here?”

“No, we rotate locations where we broadcast from,” Fred shook his head “Your mum actually told us about this place, Mia.”

“My mum? You’ve seen her? How is she?”

Mia looked to the twins and Lee eagerly; they all paused, looking between each other with uncertainly.

“Is she alright…?” Mia asked slowly

“She’s… _alright,”_ George started “but she had a run in with Dolohov. ‘Bout killed her.”

“Ohmygod,” Mia’s hand came up to her mouth “Ohmygod, where is she??”

“She’s at our Auntie Muriel’s,” Fred said “Mum is looking after her. She’s doing a lot better than she was— she’s been with us for about 6 weeks.”

“He caught her one day after leaving the Ministry, Dad found her behind a dumpster in an alleyway.” added George.

Mia’s breathing grew rapid in panic; Dolohov getting ahold of her mother had been a fear for many moons now, and the thought that she wasn’t around when her mother almost died… well, she wouldn’t forgive herself if there had been something she could’ve done instead of lounge around a tent in the woods. Remus placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing reassuringly.

“Can you take me to her?” Mia said breathlessly “Please?”

“After the broadcast,” George nodded, clasping his hands together “now, what are you two doing skulking around here?”

“We got tired of hiding in the woods,” Remus said “we were going to stay here if no one else was living here.”

“It’s all yours,” George said “No one has touched it— I think Susan was going to move herself here once she recovered, but that will probably be a while.”

Mia let out a squeak as she wrapped her arms around herself. How badly injured could Susan be? She was a skilled dueler; certainly Dolohov couldn’t’ve gotten that much of the upper hand…

“Sweetheart,” Remus said softly, squeezing her shoulder reassuringly once again. “Why don’t you go take a hot shower? Clean yourself up before we go?”

Hot shower— that sounded lovely. She nodded, kissing Remus on the cheek and nodding to the twins and Lee before retreating up the stairs. If she was going to pick her fingernails raw in anxiousness, she might as well do it while she enjoyed some warm water for a change.

Indeed, the shower was lovely— no— _glorious._ After bathing in an ice cold pond for the last four months, she had forgotten just how wonderful simple hot water was. She cranked the knob as far it would go to the warm side, goosebumps spreading all over as the near-scalding water turned her skin pink. She lost all sense of time, lost in her thoughts, worries and eventually daydreams when the water all of a sudden turned ice cold, and jolted her back to reality. She turned the shower off hastily, mumbling curses as she dried off and redressed, then made her way downstairs. She was met by Remus, Lee and the twins breaking down radio equipment and packing it away into a small, black briefcase. They must be using an extension charm like the one on her velvet pouch, as the briefcase was only the size of a sheet of paper, and the radio equipment was much, much larger. Remus extended his long arm to her, pulling her into a one arm hug and kissing the top of her damp head.

“Damn, save me any hot water?” he teased.

“I don’t think so,” she said sheepishly “I sort of forgot how long I was in there.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Remus winked “I’ll shower later— we just finished the broadcast.”

“Aw, I missed it?”

“That’s what happens when you take an hour to shower!” said Fred

“Yeah, but we told Remus you and him should be a part of our next one!” added George.

“We have guest speakers all the time,” Lee said, turning to Mia “Your mum wants to go on once she is strong enough to move.”

“She can’t move…?” Mia asked, her chest tightening again from anxiety. 

“She can only walk a little bit,” George said “We’ll take you to see her, but we have to go get one of those enchanted scrolls from Dad—“

“—He’s secret keeper over at Auntie Muriel’s.” Fred finished for him.

That’s fine, we’ll be here in the meantime,” Remus said “Maybe there’s enough hot water for me now that I can shower…”

“Sorry…” Mia grumbled

“Alright, see you all in a few— Mum is going to be so excited”

Lee, Fred and George apparated with a loud crack— the twins were never very skilled at apparation to keep the noise down, Mia was surprised neither of them had ever splinched themselves. She plopped down onto the couch and began running her hand through her damp hair to comb the tangles. Remus turned to her, a small smile creeping across his face.

“You know what I’m most excited for?” he asked

“That shower you keep bitching about?”

“No,” He said, now grinning wide “Molly Weasley’s cooking.”

* * *

“Oi! Sleepy head!”

“Wakey wakey!”

Mia opened her eyes, blinking the red haired twins into view. The beginning golden glow of a sunset was beginning to shine through the wall of windows— she hadn’t even realized she had fallen asleep.

“Nap time’s over, Mum is thrilled to see you two.”

“Alright,” She groaned sleepily, rubbing her eyes “How long have I been asleep for?”

“Couple hours,” Remus said, stepping into the living room “You looked like you needed it, so I let you sleep.”

“Mum’s making roast— come on, she won’t be happy if you let your plates get cold.”

She hardly awake yet when she felt the twins grab each of her hands, pulling her to her feet and disapparating without warning. She stumbled as her feet hit the ground, Remus catching her fall. It took her a moment to realize they were now on the front stoop of an older brick home that she didn’t recognize. The large front door had a large, ornate brass knocker situated two thirds of the way up the door. The knocker was engraved with a script P, for which Mia assumed stood for the surname Prewett. Fred reached up to the knocker, slamming it down three times, and then leaned his face in just inches from the door.

“Knock Knock!” he hollered.

“Who’s there?” added George, winking and bumping shoulders with Mia.

“Fred? George?” It was Arthur’s voice calling from the other side of the door.

“Present.” Fred and George said in unison.

“Identify yourselves, please.”

“I am Fred Weasley, twin brother of George Weasley, for whom I am exactly 2 minutes older and _much_ wiser…”

“Shut up, you prat!” George smacked him across the arm. “I’m George Weasley, handsomer twin of Fred Weasley, I once set off a dungbomb under the table at this residence during Christmas…”

“Dad, it’s cold out here— come on, it’s us!” Fred interjected “we brought Remus and Mia like we said— we verified it’s them.”

The front door flung open, and Arthur ushered them inside. He shook Remus’s hand jovially, and wrapped Mia into a big hug.

“It’s wonderful to see you both,” Arthur said happily “Come in, come in.”

Aunt Muriel’s house looked like what an old woman’s home would look like— Doilies, crocheted blankets, and various trinkets that seemed to have been passed down from Prewett to Prewett. They filed into the kitchen, getting swept into a tight hug by Molly.

“I am so happy you two are alright!” she said, transitioning her hug from Mia to Remus “Oh, it’s been too long…”

“It’s wonderful to see you, Molly.” Remus said “Indeed it has been too long—“

“The twins said my mum was here?” Mia interjected.

Molly smiled weakly “Yes, dear she is upstairs— you can go up after dinner.”

“I’d really like to see her now, if that’s alright,” Mia insisted “Please.”

“She is resting— dinner is ready, eat first then you can see her.”

Mia sat at the table with a slight huff, ignoring the side eye from Remus as he slid into the chair next to her, which was undoubtedly him reminding her to be polite. Arthur, Fred and George sat across from them as Molly served them a plate of roast, mashed potatoes and steamed carrots. The smell alone was pure heaven— Mia struggled to maintain her manners and wait for Molly to fix her own plate. The moment the Weasley matriarch sat in her chair, Remus and Mia both dug into their roast, shoveling hungrily.

“I thought you two would be hungry,” Molly said with a soft chuckle “Both of you look incredibly thin.”

“We’ve only ate canned food for months,” Mia said “You have no idea how wonderful this roast is...”

Indeed, this roast seemed to be the best thing Mia had ever consumed in her life. Molly had always been a fantastic cook, but after a diet solely on beans, potatoes and corn, this was even better than she could’ve imagined. Typically, the impeding news that her mother was injured would cause enough worry for her to turn her nose up at a plate of sustenance, but nothing was stopping her from eating today.

“Well, help yourselves—“ Arthur said, “Muriel is out for the evening so there is plenty of food to go around.”

Three plates later, and Mia’s jeans fit closer to what they used to. She hadn’t been this full in months— she was almost sick she had eaten so much. Remus looked just as bloated, just as satisfied as she did. He had eaten even more than she had, shoveling each bite with little manners as the Weasleys smiled politely, albeit awkwardly.

“May I see my mum now?” Mia asked, once the rest of the table had finished their meals.

“Very well, she is doing a lot better than she had been; Fred and George told you what happened?” Molly asked

“Just that she had a run in with Dolohov,” Remus said “he didn’t give us too many details.”

“I’ll let her tell you. She’s still pretty weak, but she can at least get up and walk around the room now…”

Molly led them to a narrow staircase that went to the second floor. The stairs creaked angrily underneath their weight as they made their way up. Susan in the first bedroom off to the left, lying in bed with the covers pulled up to her chest and tucked underneath her arms. She looked terrible— her face was gaunt and her skin sallow. Her breathing was shallow, her chest rising and falling in quick pulses as her eyelids twitched rapidly.

“I didn’t think she’d still be asleep,” Molly whispered, “Why don’t we go back downstairs…”

“No!” Mia said quickly “May I stay here until she wakes? Please?”

“Alright, just holler if she wakes and needs any potions,” Molly said “Remus, come join us for some tea? Arthur and I can brief you on what’s been going on”

Remus looked at Mia questioningly, “Go ahead, I’ll be fine up here.” Mia said, giving him a nod.

Remus and Molly retreated out of the small bedroom. Mia listened to their footsteps creak down the stairs before she took a moment to look around the bedroom. The room was plain, an obvious guest room that no one had resided in for years. She set down on the edge of the bed and watched her mother’s shallow breathing, fighting the uncomfortable anxious feeling of an elephant sitting on her chest. She laid down at the edge of the bed after a moment, curling herself up like a cat to ensure her mother still had enough room. She continued watching her mother’s breathing, praying it wouldn’t, but fearing it would stop.


	60. chapter 60

Mia wasn’t sure how long she had laid here; there was no clock in the very plain guest room. Her mind wandered as she watched the erratic breathing of her feeble mother; the longer she lay there staring, the darker her thoughts became.

What would she be feeling right now if Dolohov had killed her mother? Would her anxiousness be replaced with sorrow, or would she just simply feel numb? After all the death she had experienced, would the grieving period feel routine? Had Susan Roswell been murdered, Mia didn’t know how she would feel. One thing she had determined in the time spent watching her mother’s shallow breathing was that had Dolohov killed her, Mia would subject the sadistic Death Eater to the same fate. 

There was no other option in her mind. She wouldn’t be able to take the self-righteous path anymore. She would hurt him— make him suffer like he made so many others do. She would use the cruciatis curse on him, allowing him to squirm and writhe in pain at her will and mercy. Only after he begged for death would she oblige him— but not before she broke every single bone is his body with her bare hands.

Still, staring at the frail woman whom she bared so much resemblance to, she felt she may still go down this dark path that was nipping at her insides. Whether or not Susan made a full recovery, she wanted revenge— she wanted to teach Dolohov a lesson. Mess with the people she loved, and feel her wrath. She was strong, tenacious, and a force to be reckoned with— he would see that.

Mia was so lost in thought that she was startled severely (so much so she nearly fell off the bed) when Susan began coughing. She choked and sputtered, struggling to breathe as she came out of her coma-like sleep.

“Mum?— _Mum?!”_

Mia reached over and shook her gently, trying to gain Susan’s attention. When she couldn’t, she hollered over her shoulder for Molly. The Weasley matriarch was up the stairs and in the bedroom in just a matter of seconds with a leather pouch of potions in tow. 

“Susan, sweetheart, just relax— I have your potions here…”

Molly pulled out a few vials and tipped them down Susan’s throat one by one. After a moment her fit stopped and her breathing slowed.

“That’s better…” Molly said soothingly “Look who’s here to see you.”

Susan attempted to sit up slightly as she squinted at Mia. “Mia? Is that really you?” Her voice was hoarse, raspy— as if she was recovering from severe strep throat. Mia took Susan’s hand, smiling weakly.

“Hi mum— yes, it’s really me.”

“Oh, my sweet girl!” Susan squeezed Mia’s hand gently “I regret that I can’t hug you properly— where is Remus? He isn’t with you?”

“He’s downstairs, but never mind him— what happened to you?”

“Dolohov caught me when I was leaving the Ministry. He, Rowle and Selwyn ambushed me as I was walking into an alley to apparate. I—” Susan winced as she took too deep of a breath. “I was alone— I lost our duel, regretfully,” 

Mia’s stomach churned at imaging her mother fighting three against one— naturally she would lose a duel with three against one.

“Whatever dark magic they fought with nearly did me in, but not before they broke my collarbone and a few ribs—“ Susan paused for a moment, her face twisting “—and assaulted me,” 

This portion of her recount came out choked, constricted as if the words spoken were painful to her. Mia felt the strong urge to vomit— she wanted to run and hurl repeatedly into the nearest wastebasket or toilet, but she remained seated on the bed, listening to her mother continue. 

“I was bleeding and nearly unconscious when threw me into a dumpster. I don’t know how I managed to cast a patronus, but I did— Arthur came to my aide and brought me straight here.”

“My god…” Mia whispered. She was horrified, nauseated, and _angry._ She took a breath before speaking again, wanting to remain calm while in Susan’s presence. “Why didn’t Dolohov just use the killing curse on you? He obviously wanted you dead.”

“Oh, you know him;” Susan said, scoffing “Loves to see us suffer.”

“Whatever spells he used would’ve killed her eventually,” Molly said heavily “It took me a little time to find the right potions and healing spells to keep her alive— we don’t know if there will be permanent damage from the attack yet.”

_Permanent damage?_ Mia felt like the walls were closing in around her as her heart began violently beating in her chest. Would her mother be able to work again? Walk unaided? Simply leave the house? Susan squeezed Mia’s hand reassuringly, seeming to now pick up on her internal panic.

“I’m doing better, Mia, there’s no need to fret so much” Susan said, but her hoarse, strained voice instilled no confidence “Molly missed her calling as a healer. She has been wonderful to me, and I have full faith in her ability to nurse me as healthy as we can.”

Molly fought a smile as her face flushed scarlet. “I appreciate that. Susan— Are you in the mood to eat? I could bring you something if so?"

“I think I could eat a little— thank you.”

Molly nodded and retreated out of the bedroom, her footsteps creaking on the stairs as she descended to the first floor. Susan shifted, groaning slightly as she re-positioned herself.

“Mum, I can’t believe they…”

“That’s not something I’d like to discuss any further,” Susan interjected quickly. After a moment, her face softened, and she changed the subject. “Tell me everything you’ve been doing since I saw you last— start with the moment you lot left my house.”

Mia rehashed their month at the cottage with Penelope and Eric, telling her about how Remus broke taboo and they had to chain Fenrir Greyback and his two cronies in the cellar to ensure they finished the polyjuice potion.

“And they made it to America safely?” Susan asked

“Yeah, they sent me a blank post card via owl,” Mia said “So after that, Remus and I lived in Cepheus’s tent in the middle of the Forest of Dean for the last four months. We’ve lived off nothing but canned food, but we’ve been working on strengthening my wandless magic.”

“How is that going for you?”

“Good, I think. I can do some pretty cool stuff. Remus is a phenomenal teacher…” Mia smiled “How about I show you tomorrow afternoon? Are you strong enough to make it to the backyard? My new tricks require space.”

“With help, I should be able to get down there,” Susan said “I look forward to seeing your new ‘tricks’, as you call them.”

Mia chuckled softly as she lay down on her side next to Susan, ensuring to give her mother enough space as to not accidentally hurt her.

“I love you, Mum.” Mia whispered “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Susan said softly. “I thought about you every day you were gone— I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, mum. I hate that I kept you worrying.”

“I wasn’t worried, per se, I knew you’d be alright,” Susan smirked “you are my daughter, after all.”

* * *

The Weasley’s were always such gracious hosts. They had insisted that Remus and Mia sleep at Muriel’s previous night, so that Molly could serve them a proper breakfast (“You both are just too thin!”), and Muriel could go to the store and stock the cabin with food for the two of them.

Muriel was quite the personality. Mia wasn’t sure if she enjoyed the old woman, or wanted to rip her throat out. At first, the woman’s sassiness appealed to Mia’s sense of humor, but the moment something even slightly offensive to werewolves slipped out of her mouth, she instantly felt the urge to drive her fork into the centenarian’s neck. Remus picked up on this; he squeezed her thigh underneath the table to get her attention, and continued to squeeze until she released her vice-grip on her silverware.

Half-way through dinner, Molly began briefing her on what they had informed Remus of the previous evening.

“So Mia, The Order has mostly moved into hiding. Bill, Arthur, Fred and George have all quit working—“ 

“Yeah, but we’re still doing mail orders!” said George proudly

“You-Know-Who can’t shut us down completely!” Fred added. “U-No-Poo has been a best seller, thanks to its name!”

“And function, Freddie” George said, smacking his twin upside the back of the head “That product was my idea— its genius, if I don’t say so myself...”

Molly rolled her eyes “Not that this mail-order business is smart, I inform them time and time again. Kingsley and Tonks went into hiding as well, after Kingsley broke taboo—“

“Kingsley?! Tonks?!” Mia’s heart leapt at hearing their names; “How’s Reggie?! Oh, tell me they are alright…”

“They all are doing fine,” Molly said “Little Reggie is getting so big, here; you want to see a photo?” 

Molly handed Mia a family photograph of Kingsley, Tonks and Reggie sitting on large sofa, all donning Father Christmas hats. Reggie was huge— nearly doubled in size than what she remembered him. A lump formed in her throat as she studied the photograph— she missed them so _so_ much. 

“This was taken on Christmas Day; he’s already so much bigger than he is in this photograph.”

Mia passed the photograph to Remus, fearing if she looked at it any longer she would start crying. “What about Hogwarts? What’s going on there?”

“It’s pretty bad,” Arthur started “With Snape as Headmaster and the Carrows as his deputies, it’s not the same school we all know. Ginny, Neville and Luna were giving the administration a hard time— Luna went missing from the train on their way home for Christmas, and no one’s heard from her since.”

Mia frowned “Do you think the Death Eaters took her?”

“Most likely, Arthur continued “Xenophilius Lovegood was posting quite a bit of pro-Harry propaganda in the Quibbler, they probably took her to try to keep him in line.”

Mia wasn’t sure what would be worse; being killed by Death Eaters, or being held captive by them. “So, what is the Order doing then, exactly?” she asked

“We broadcast the truth on Potterwatch, and try to keep other’s safe.” interjected George 

“There’s not really much else we can do. Harry, Ron and Hermione are out there and on a mission entrusted to them by Dumbledore. We do what we can to support them and to keep ourselves and our friends safe” Arthur added.

“Well,” Muriel interjected “I, for one, think…”

Mia didn’t listen to whatever bullshit Muriel started ranting about. She was frustrated— The Order indeed was done, as she had feared for months now. Most of the members had been forced into hiding, and her mother nearly killed. She seethed with regret as she pushed her eggs around on her plate— she should’ve gone to America. She should’ve spoken up when she had the chance. Had they gone, maybe her and Remus could be going to a show at a theater, or taking leisurely strolls through shopping malls and parks like a regular married couple. Instead, they were going to be using a cabin in the woods as their hidey-hole, where a 107-year old woman would do their grocery shopping for them.

“Harry is the best hope we have, Muriel,” Arthur said, though a mouthful of eggs. “Trust in that.”

_Trust in that._ Was Arthur really suggesting that all of their fates rested solely in the hands of a 17-year old boy? Mia took swig of orange juice, fighting the irritated bubbling her stomach did whenever she was in periods of stress. 

_We’re so fucked._

* * *

“Get in the Jacuzzi, my love,” Remus called “It’s freezing out here.”

Mia stood leaning over the railing of the porch that overlooked into the dark, secluded forest around them. She was wrapped in her thick traveling cloak, albeit still shivering from the frosty temperatures of this late February night. Thick steam rolled off the surface of the Jacuzzi water, so thick Remus was barely visible in the far corner of the tub.

“Come on— you could hardly wait to get in this thing a couple days ago…” he called again.

<[?She was lost in thought, images forming in her imagination of Dolohov, Rowle and Selwyn attacking Susan in the middle of the alley, hexing her mother until she was near-death, only to throw her away as trash.

_“Whatever dark magic they fought with nearly did me in, but not before they broke my collarbone and a few ribs, and assaulted me…”_ Susan’s recount of the incident repeated in her mind over and over. Even though Susan didn’t elaborate on exactly what the word assault meant in this situation, deep in the pit of her stomach, Mia knew.

She thought back to Fenrir Greyback, soaked in Bill’s blood and yanking her pants off of her with his psychopathic, sinister grin plastered to his face, and to Andrew Flint, smacking her across the face and forcing her skirt up. She had gotten lucky in both instances, and was thankful neither man got to go through with the heinous plot they both had had. Susan hadn’t been as lucky. She hadn’t had strange and unexplained wandless magic or a person nearby to save her from that fate— and then she was thrown away like trash. Hatred, anger and anguish simmered deep in her— however it would hibernate until the moment she would come across any of those men. 

“Mia,” Remus called for a third time. “Come here, please?”

This time, she obliged. She walked over to the steaming tub and shed her cloak, then her clothes until she was left standing in the chill stark naked. Her skin erupted in goosebumps as the chilly air hit her skin. Remus eyed her up and down, drinking in the sight of her before outstretching his hand for her to take.

“Come in, it’s cold.”

She took his hand and stepped inside, sinking down in the hot water up to her collarbones. Her long dark hair splayed out in the water around her; she dunked her head back to wet her entire head.

“Now, why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind?” Remus said, sitting back in the corner he had sat in previously, and pulling her to him to straddle his lap. “And don’t say it’s nothing, because I know you’d be lying.”

She sighed, frowning. “I can’t stop thinking about my mum…”

“She’s going to be alright, Molly is very confident at this point.”

“It’s not that— I can’t stop thinking about what happened to her. What they… _did_ to her,” a lump formed in Mia’s throat “They threw her in the dumpster after. They threw her away as if she were _trash._ ”

“I know, sweetheart,” he said softly “It’s terrible, what they did.”

“They should pay for it,” Mia whispered dangerously “Feel pain like they made her feel.”

“Mia, careful…” Remus warned, still speaking softly “Revenge is not a path you want to go down. That can be a one way ticket to—“

“I know,” she said impatiently “Torture and murder can darken the soul— I don’t need you to tell me.”

_But they deserve it. They deserve to hurt, to be tortured, and to be thrown away like the trash they are._

Mia chose to focus her gaze just past Remus’s ear, rather than look him in the eye. He studied her, looking at her as if she were a difficult puzzle he was trying to solve. After a moment, he simply changed the subject.

“Are you alright with showing everyone what we’ve been working on the past few months?” he asked “I’m sure if we show your mum, everyone else will want to see.”

“Yeah, I’m alright with showing everyone.”

She still did not meet his eyes. She drew her hand out of the water, drawing her fingers together as she moved her hand upward. Water rose up and followed her hand movements, as if it had its own intelligence, miming her every move. Remus watched curiously, his eyes following her hand’s movements.

“You never cease to amaze me,” He murmured “You have impressed me far beyond any other witch or wizard I have seen or known.”

“Shut up,” she laughed, finally turning her gaze to him “You’re trying to flatter me only because I’m naked in your lap.”

“Not only,” Remus said slyly, a boyish smile crossing his face “But speaking of you being naked in my lap…”

For a few moments, Mia had forgotten all her troubles, her mind transported back to their honeymoon where he had taken her in that very spot of the Jacuzzi, half drunk on fine champagne. There were no leaves on the trees to rustle in the background as there had been that night, but over her moans and gasps, she wouldn’t’ve been able to hear them anyway.

* * *

Remus stood with Arthur, Molly, Fred and George on his right, against the house as Mia faced them, standing half a football field away from them. Susan and Muriel sat in lawn chairs to his left, wrapped up in thick blankets to keep warm. The Weasley’s and he were encased in their thickest traveling cloaks, bouncing on their heels to keep warm.

“Alright, Mia, I want to see ground first! Keep it small, we don’t want to cave in the house.” 

Mia nodded and closed her eyes and flipped her palms outward. Slowly, she raised her arms as she inhaled deeply, rooting her feet in place as the ground shook violently beneath her. When she opened her eyes, she was surrounded by large, stalagmite-esque structures, encircling her in a semi-circle.

“Excellent!” Remus called “Now flatten the ground back out!”

She flipped her palms down and lowered her arms back to her sides, watching as the stalagmites flattened back into a field of brown, dormant grass.

“Storm Cloud!” Remus called again

Mia swirled her left hand in the air above her— a large cumulonimbus cloud formed overtop of the field, dark as a shadow— as if a heavy downpour was about to occur.

“Lightning strike!”

Mia flicked her wrist; a bold of lightning struck half-way between where she and the others stood, singeing a patch of grass.

“Great, Mia— now clear this up!”

Mia swayed both hands above her head from right to left. The dark cloud faded lighter and lighter before disappearing with a soft fizzle.

“That was great! You are getting much better—.”

“What about fire?” She interrupted, jogging back towards the house. “Can we try it today?”

“Fire?” Susan asked “You want her to learn to manipulate fire?”

Remus sighed, ignoring Susan and speaking to Mia. “I’ve told you, I don’t want to get into fire just yet—”

_“Remus Lupin!”_ Susan hissed “Fiendfyre is a dark art— surely that’s not what she’s talking about.”

Remus ran a hand through his hair “There is no other fire manipulation spell other than Fiendfyre.”

“You cannot be serious!” Susan cried “She could burn herself to a crisp!”

“I know that, that’s why we haven’t done anything with fire,” Remus said impatiently “Water, weather, and ground however are much easier to control.”

Mia scoffed “Come off it, I can handle a little fire— look at how far I’ve come in four months!”

“No.” Remus said firmly “No fire. Not yet.”

“But—“

“No buts,” He said, holding his hand up to silence her (and receiving an eye roll for it) “You need to trust me on this— now get back out there, let’s try some more weather patterns.”

* * *

_“Greetings to our loyal listeners!”_

Lee Jordan had his radio equipment strewn all about the cabin’s dining room table, broadcasting another episode of Potterwatch. Mia and Remus stood off to the side, listening to the charismatic wizard’s speech.

_“On today’s episode of Potterwatch, we want to remind you all of some basic safety protocol— whether you are on the run, or still living in your homes._

_If it looks and smells dead, but is still moving, it’s an Inferi! As the infamous gingerbread man would say— run, run, as fast as you can!_

_Beware of Snatchers— they can call for backup and outnumber you quicker than you can say You-Know-Who. Avoid individuals who look shifty and have a bad attitude._

_Know where your loved ones are— know when they are supposed to be home from work, and always always always verify their identity before letting them inside your home. Establish a code word, or ask them a question they would only be able to answer. Wrong answers, no entry!_

_We also bring some sad news that the Wizard Wireless Network failed to report. Our hearts are heavy to inform you all of the deaths of the Gentry family— Alice and Leon, and their three children Thomas, Brian, and Sallie were murdered by Death Eaters for refusing a ‘routine’ home search. Alice Gentry was a Healer with St. Mungo’s Hospital, accused of harboring a muggle-born and his family._

_Also to report the deaths of the Davies Family— Helen and Allen, and their son Chester were murdered when Allen Davies refused to be taken into Ministry custody. Helen Davies was a Behavior Specialist for St. Mungo’s Hospital. The family was staying under the protection of Gentry family at the time off all of their deaths."_

Mia felt like her world around her was spinning— _Helen?_ Helen Davies? Her Helen? Helen and her family were supposed to be out of the country. She couldn’t comprehend this; She dropped to her knees and began to shake, the contents of her stomach violently stirring. Remus knelt down next to her, pulling her close and whispering in her ear, as to not interrupt the broadcast. 

“Shh, Mia, just breathe— shh…”

Lee glanced at them with concern on his face, but continued his broadcast.

_"If anyone in your family knows how to perform a Fidelius charm, we recommend placing your residence under this enchantment. We do not believe the Gentry’s or the Davies’s were protected by this charm. It may save your life if Death Eaters come knocking._

_Keep watch over your loved ones, and protect your muggle friends and neighbors. We all need to stick together in these sorts of times. That’s all we have for you today, tune in to our next broadcast— the password is Roswell.”_

Lee flipped the switch on his radio equipment and threw his headset down.

“Mia, you alright?”

Mia was hyperventilating at this point, ignoring Remus’s pleading whispers for her to slow her breathing and try to relax. The world around her was fuzzy and the edges of her vision black as she began to vomit. She was spilling sick everywhere, choking as she fought to breathe.

“Helen Davies was Mia’s counselor at St. Mungo’s.” Remus said to Lee.

“I’m so sorry…” Lee said softly, shifting uncomfortably

“I should’ve protected them, I offered to help…” Mia choked

“Sweetheart, you can’t blame yourself…” Remus said soothingly “Come on, let’s get this cleaned—”

“Remus, she’s _dead!_ ” Mia shrieked “Who did it?! Which Death Eaters killed them?!”

“I don’t know, their bodies were found after the fact.” Lee said heavily.

Mia let out a mournful wail, sobbing in a moment of silence before she spoke again. “She’s dead… I can’t believe she’s dead…”

“I know, I know…”

Mia began dry heaving, as there was nothing left in her stomach. She shook in his arms for nearly twenty minutes, until her hysterics reduced to small sniffles. He picked her up and carried her to the couch as Lee packed up the broadcasting equipment, looking uncomfortable to be accidentally intruding on Mia’s panic attack. Remus cast a heating charm over a fluffy throw blanket and wrapped her up tightly.

“She was supposed to be leaving the country; they were supposed to be getting out…” she said softly.

Remus frowned “Maybe their plans changed. Maybe they weren’t able to leave the country safely.”

Mia’s eyes were so swollen they hurt. Her throat felt raw from sobbing and her cheeks felt chapped from her salty tears. She looked at Remus sadly, asking him a question she knew he didn’t have the answer to.

“Why does everyone I love have to die?”


	61. chapter 61

As February shifted into March, the wind no longer had a crisp, frosty chill, but a certain dampness in the air remained. The clearing around the corner from the cabin had thawed to a squishy, muddy mess, but thanks to the impervious charm, Mia’s boots were unaffected.

Mia stood in the middle of the field, her mood as gloomy as the cloudy sky above her. It had been a few weeks since receiving news of Helen’s death through Lee’s broadcast, and guilt was still nipping at her.

She had offered Helen and her family assistance. She wished they would’ve accepted and went into hiding with the protection of members of the Order of the Phoenix. She wished she would’ve insisted harder, pushed her to accept, but as Remus reminded her time and time again, how could she have known what was going to happen?

Susan seemed to be gaining a little strength back each day, but a wound stretching across her stomach so far would not heal. Molly said it was most likely some kind of severing charm— different from the one that took George’s ear off— because she wasn’t able to get the wound to close with the current regimen of potions. St. Mungo’s had been brought up a couple times, but Susan refused.

_“We do not know the state that St. Mungo’s has been compromised,”_ Susan had said _“You are doing just fine, Molly, if I may intrude on yours and Muriel’s hospitality a little while longer, I insist that I stay here.”_

Mia felt powerless, and she didn’t like it. The only time she felt in control was when she was training her wandless magic; something about being able to control the world’s elements gave her a grounding sense of control. Remus even suggested that they venture to Shell Cottage, where Bill and Fleur were living, to try some water manipulation with the sea.

Fire, on the other hand, he continued to refuse. She felt he was underestimating her, thinking she was still his 18-year-old student not ready to take on advanced branches magic just yet— but look what she could do! She could form mountains with the wave of her hand. Countless lessons over the last few weeks she asked to try fire, and he turned her down each and every time. They argued about it this morning, the impending full moon due to arrive that evening heightening their irritation towards each other. Mia was tired of being told no, so while Remus was in the shower, she decided she would go out to the clearing and try manipulating fire herself.

She focused all her might on conjuring flames a few paces in front of her. It took a few tries, but when she focused all her energy on the rage and fury she felt towards Dolohov and his assistants for the horrors done to her mother, she succeeded. She took a few minutes to slowly enlarge and diminish the flames before her, each time allowing the fire to grow larger before scaling it back.

_“MIA!”_

Remus’s shout cut through the trees as she heard his footsteps thundering towards her. She broke focus, his shouts distracting her, and the flames started expanding rapidly before her. She waved her hand quickly to extinguish the evidence, but the fire did not respond. It kept expanding; in a matter of seconds it was triple its size, seeming to grow as quickly as her panic was.

Remus was panting when he reached her; She was expecting him to start yelling, but instead he gently placed his hands on her shoulders, speaking calmly.

“Mia, concentrate and put the flames out— just relax, you are in control.” 

She waved her hand quickly a couple times— nothing. She felt sweat form on the back of her neck, unsure if it was from the flames, or her nerves.

“It’s not working!” she cried “I can’t put it out!”

“Sweetheart, you _can_ do it—“ Remus said reassuringly “just relax, concentrate, and put out the flame. I know you can do this. Take a deep breath and try again.”

She took a few deep, steadying breaths. She put her hands back out in front of her and exhaled as she closed her eyes and lowered her palms towards the ground. She wasn’t sure how she did it, but this time the flames obeyed, growing smaller and smaller until they extinguished into a small stream of smoke.

_“That—“_ Remus pointed at the patch of singed grass. “—is why I didn’t want you playing with fire,” Remus’s tone was now harsh, scolding. “It is much more temperamental— you could’ve started a forest fire!”

“I was fine, until _you_ snuck up on me,” She snapped “You made me lose focus!”

“No, you lost focus all on your own,” Remus retorted “What if a deer had walked by and distracted you? Are you going to blame the deer when this entire area was engulfed by fiendfyre? You need to learn to be 100% in control, and until you can do that, you are not—”

“Quit treating me like a child!” she interjected angrily

“Then quit acting like one!” Remus quipped back “Inside, now—”

He grabbed her wrist to drag her back towards the cabin; she gritted her teeth and dug her heels into the squishy ground, holding herself in place.

_“No.”_

Remus let go of her wrist and turned to look at her; he was taken aback by the boldness of her refusal. He narrowed his eyes, giving her an appraising look. _“…No?”_

“No,” She said simply, crossing her arms. “Teach me. Train me to not lose focus, no matter what is going on around me. Rather than simply telling me no, train me so I don’t burn us to a crisp.”

He pondered this thought for a moment before his expression softened “Alright,” he said, nodding and gesturing her to go take her place a few paces away. “Middle of the field, let’s get to work— moonrise isn’t until 7:40.”

The full moon had run its course later that night, transforming Remus into the creature he despised. The two of them in isolation from the rest of the world seemed to make him less anxious about his monthly transformation, no longer insisting Mia remain in her Animagus form for the duration of the cycle, despite him always taking his potion. 

He lay with her that night, allowing Mia to use his plush fur as a pillow for the evening. She was so used to the two of them curling up together as wolves, but curling up with him in her human form gave her a different sense of intimacy. She had almost forgotten he would transform back, as that morning when she awoke, she was almost surprised to see a pallid faced human Remus in place of the wolf.

Today was Remus’s birthday; he was still asleep next to her, lying on his back and snoring softly. She admired him for a few minutes, admiring the way his mouth hung open when he was in a deep sleep, and how his sandy hair hung shaggily over his forehead. He had so much more grey hair now— she remembered the few silver streaks at his temples the first time they met, but now he was heavily greyed throughout the sides and back of his hair. She wondered how much longer until his entire head was grey— his condition did indeed add nearly 10 years on his appearance. Still, he was handsomer than ever in her mind, silver haired or not. She loved the way his eyes crinkled slightly when he smiled, and how distinguished he looked with a 5 o clock shadow. Even the dark shadows under his eyes and his pallid face, he was so handsome to her.

She reached out and ran her hand up his stomach and chest, drawing soft patterns. He stirred, but did not open his eyes.

“Good Morning,” she said softly

“Mornin’” he mumbled. 

She wasn’t sure if he was even truly awake by the sleepiness in his voice. She leaned over and kissed his stubbly cheek; this time he shifted more, inhaling as he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her to him.

“Happy birthday.” She murmured

“mhmm” he hummed; after a moment “What time is it?”

She glanced at the clock; it was later than she thought “Just after 9,” she said “what do you want for breakfast?”

“More sleep,” he grumbled “My bones _ache…”_

“You can’t sleep all morning, sleepy head,” she giggled “maybe I can help you feel a little better? Help wake you up?”

She slid her hand down inside his boxers. She wrapped her hand around his cock, pleased to see he had morning wood. His eyes flew open.

“Well, good morning.” He sounded much more awake just from a few light strokes of her palm. She chuckled softly, relishing in the sight of him enjoying her touch. He leaned his head back and let out a soft groan. “This birthday is already off to a great start…”

Later that evening, they lay tangled together on the couch, taking advantage of the cabin’s television and VCR collection. The choices were not as vast as Penelope’s collection, but they had found a decent movie to lay back and enjoy together.

A sudden knock at the door startled them; they jumped up, wands drawn as they tiptoed quietly to the door.

“Who’s there?” Remus called, holding his hand up to have Mia to stay back “identify yourself.”

“Kingsley Shacklebolt and Nymphadora Tonks” Kingsley’s deep, slow voice replied on the other side of the door “with Reggie”

“Let them in, let them in!” Mia whispered excitedly.

Remus ignored her. “What favor did I ask of you on my wedding day?”

“To dance with Mia in place of her father— along with Arthur, Bill and Eric.” Kingsley replied without falter.

Remus yanked the door open, and Mia threw herself into Kingsley’s arms.

“I’ve missed you guys so much!” she shrieked, switching her embrace from him to Tonks, hugging her much more carefully, for the baby in her arms.

“It is very good to see you both,” Remus shook Kingsley’s hand firmly. “Please, come in.”

As the three of them entered, grocery sacks levitating behind them followed.

“Molly sent us with groceries,” Tonks said “Sorry we haven’t come to see you sooner— things have been crazy, and Reggie hasn’t been sleeping…”

“No matter, I’m just glad you’re here now,” Mia said, then turned her attention to Reggie “He’s so big! Can I hold him?”

Tonks handed her Reggie, giggling and cooing happily once in Mia’s arms. He was so big, so much heavier than when she last saw him. She fought a lump forming in her throat; she had missed her friends and godson so much, she could cry.

“Hi Reggie! It’s your Aunt Mia— I hope you remember me…”

“Of course he remembers you, look at him smile!” Tonks said “Happy birthday, Remus—Penelope and Eric owled us a gift for you.”

“You’ve talked to Penelope?!” Mia asked eagerly, bouncing Reggie up and down in her arms “How are they? When did you hear from them last?”

“We’ve been in contact with them since they got to America, they were so excited when we told them you guys had turned up—” Kingsley pulled a parcel from his traveling cloak and handing to it Remus. “—here, this is from them.”

Remus tore open the wrappings; it was a paperback copy of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. A note was taped to the front, written in blue ink in neat, precise print that Mia recognized as Penelope’s handwriting.

_Hopefully you haven’t read this one yet— it’s a muggle classic._

_Happiest of Birthdays, missing you and Mia._

_Penelope and Eric_

“I have read The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, it was one of my mother’s favorite books,” Remus smiled, turning the book in his hand a few times “But it’s been quite a few years since I’ve read it. Be sure to thank them for me.”

“Will do,“ Kingsley clasped his hands together “Now, I know you have to have some scotch lying around here— how about a drink?”

The four of them chatted over drinks for hours; it wasn’t until Reggie started to fuss that Kingsley and Tonks had to bid them farewell.

“You know how babies get—“ Tonks said “They get all bent out of shape if bedtime doesn’t happen on schedule.”

“Well, thank you for stopping by,” Remus said “It was a pleasure seeing both of you— please come by any time.”

“Will do, thank you for having us,” Kingsley pulled a couple small scrolls from the front of his robes “These are scrolls to get to Andromeda’s and to Bill’s. Stop by whenever you like.”

They watched their friends step out onto the porch and apparate away; it left Mia with a melancholy feeling, wishing they had gotten more time.

“Damn, I missed them.” she whispered.

Remus smiled weakly, wrapping an arm around her. “Me too.”

* * *

April came around with pleasanter weather. They decided on a nice day to venture over to Shell Cottage, to visit with Bill and Fleur and hopefully get some practice with water manipulation with the sea.

Their feet hit the sand with a soft thud; salty air filled their lungs as they both took a deep breath, now able to breathe after the uncomfortable sensation of apparition. A small, concrete cottage was lonely up a quarter mile off the seashore, surrounded by large ornamental grasses that swayed in the sea breeze.

“It’s pretty here,” Mia said as they began walking towards the house “and seemingly safe.”

“Yeah, I always liked this place— we used it as a safe house during the first war.”

“Was it as bad?” she asked “The first war, I mean— as it is now?”

“Well, I wasn’t wanted by the Ministry during the first war, so I had it just a touch easier,” Remus smiled sadly “It… is worse now than it was. Vol— You Know Who never got this far last time.”

The front door to Shell Cottage had been painted teal, but the paint was now peeling off of the salt-worn door. Remus wrapped three times; after a moment, Bill’s voice called from the other side of the door.

“Who’s there?” 

“Remus and Amelia Lupin,” Remus replied, interlacing his fingers with Mia’s “You gave an enchanted scroll with this address to Kingsley Shacklebolt to give to us, so that we may call here.”

“This question is for Mia; during our time at Hogwarts, what did I catch you out of bed doing on a regular basis during your first year?”

“Walking around, because I couldn’t sleep— nightmares.”

The front door swung open; Bill had a large, toothy smile plastered to his scarred face.

“About time! We wondered when we’d hear from you lot,” Bill exclaimed “Fleur is making dinner, there’s plenty to go around— Mum said you two were skeletons when you showed up at Auntie Muriel’s.”

They walked through a narrow entrance way into a small, quaint kitchen where Fleur stood over the stove, her silvery blonde hair shimmering from the light coming in the window.

“Ah! Zere you two are!” Fleur cried, wiping her hands on her apron before grabbing both of their faces and kissing their cheeks. “Remus, Mia, it is so good to see you both— Oh my, look at you! Both so skinny— good zing I cooked.”

“Hi, Fleur.” Mia smiled “Thanks for having us, and on such short notice.”

Normally, Fleur annoyed Mia to her wit’s end, but standing here in the kitchen of Shell Cottage, she had never been happier to see her.

“But of course!” Fleur cried “Sit sit, right over zere— Bill, get zem a drink, what would you like?”

“Remus? Mia?”

Mia’s head turned to see Hermione Granger standing in the threshold on the kitchen, looking at the two of them eagerly.

“Hermione?” Mia said, sweeping her into a hug “How are you? Where’s Harry and—“

“Blimey!" Ron cried, now appearing a few paces behind Hermione “Harry! Lupin and Mia are here!”

Ron swept Mia into a hug as Harry thundered down the stairs, followed by Dean Thomas and Luna Lovegood.

“Whoa! It’s a full house!” Remus said, shaking Harry’s hand enthusiastically “Bill, you should’ve said you were taking in strays”

“The lot of them showed up a couple weeks ago,” Bill said “With Mr. Ollivander and Griphook, a goblin from Gringotts.”

“No kidding, Where were you all?” Remus asked

“Malfoy Manor,” Ron said “Got caught by some snatchers.”“Zis food is ready!” Fleur interjected “Come eat, you can tell zem all about it over dinner.”

Harry, Ron and Hermione told Remus and Mia their tales of traveling the countryside over the last few months, eating nothing but wild mushrooms. Mia wondered if the wild mushrooms were tastier than the cans of beans her and Remus had subjected themselves to. They told them about how they broke taboo, and Fenrir Greyback and his gang came to collect them, and took them to Malfoy Manor when Harry was recognized.

“We should’ve killed him.” Mia whispered to Remus.

Harry and Ron continued about how they found Luna, Dean, Mr. Ollivander and Griphook in the cellar, while Hermione was being tortured by Bellatrix upstairs. Mia caught a glimpse of an injury on her arm that Hermione tried to hide, but she swore it looked like the word _Mudblood_ was scratched into her arm.

“Wormtail is dead,” Harry said to Remus “strangled himself, his silver hand turned on him.”

Remus simply nodded at this news, not giving an indication whether he was upset or delighted by this news. Mia put her hand on his thigh under the table, squeezing gently in comfort. They finished their tale by telling them how Dobby, the free elf, helped them escape and was accidentally mortally wounded in the process.

“We buried him, on the hill,” Harry said heavily “We wanted to give him a beautiful view.”

“I’m sure he would’ve loved that.” Mia said, smiling weakly.

“Are you two staying here?” Ron asked, through a mouthful of mashed potatoes

“No, no— just visiting,” Remus said “We needed the sea for part of Mia’s training.”

“Mia’s training for what?” Hermione asked, furrowing her brow.

Mia grinned, turning to Remus “Can we show them after dinner?”

Remus smirked “Yes, lets.”

The waves crashed gently on the seashore. Seagulls called off in the distance. Mia rolled her jeans up to mid-thigh, her marred flesh just barely poking out from the cuffed hem. She stepped barefoot into the sea; the water was freezing cold, cutting through her like a knife. She would’ve assumed that by the beginning of April the water would’ve warmed, but alas, that was not the case. She went in mid-calf deep, and then turned to look at the group standing on the shoreline.

“Alright boss,” She hollered to Remus on the shore line “Where shall I start?”

“Try something simple— high tide”

She closed her eyes and drew her arms straight back. Slowly, she pushed her palms towards the shoreline, pushing the water with it so that the water reached the high tide line, then withdrew. She did this a few times; looks of astonishment crossed the entire group’s faces. 

“What about trying some waves?” Remus suggested.

The sea was calm today, but with some focus, Mia was able to create some larger waves, as if there was a strong breeze. The harder she focused, the larger the wave became, but she only reached around a 5ft height, as to not create a tidal wave.

“I’m _freezing,”_ she said through chattering teeth as she walked back to the group. “You know what would really warm me up?”

_“No,”_ Remus said “Especially not here—“

“You don’t even know what I was going to say!” she interjected.

“Yes. I do.” 

Remus wrapped an arm around her, rubbing her upper arm vigorously in an attempt to warm her up. Mia rolled her eyes at him as the whole group made their way back up to the cottage.

“That was something, Mia.” said Bill

“Yeah, really something!” said Ron “Can you teach me how to do some of that?”

That evening, they sat around the cramped kitchen table, playing cards and laughing over butterbeers (Remus and Bill with glasses of scotch), trashing talking and jeering at each other. It felt like summertime at Grimmauld place had a few years back, where Sirius would have poker tournaments. Mia had missed this feeling; the feeling of being with friends, having fun, enjoying themselves. 

Shell Cottage was extremely crowded, with all the guests Bill and Fleur had staying with them, had Remus and Mia needed to stay there would not have been room. Their cabin, in contrast, could’ve housed all their guests comfortably— upon entering the large, quiet cabin late that evening, Mia felt guilty they didn’t offer to take any guests to come stay.

“We can always take people another night, for now let’s just get some rest,” Remus said, stripping off his day clothes. “I had quite a bit of fun this evening— I forgot what that was like.”

“Me too,” Mia climbed into bed and propped herself up on her side, watching Remus undress. She admired the way his muscles rippled as he lifted his shirt up over his head. “Hey— before you start putting pajamas on…”

He stopped, flashing a boyish grin at her. With a playful roar, he leapt towards her— she howled with laugher as he tickled her, not letting up until she screamed “UNCLE!!” over and over again. He stopped and pinned her arms above her head, smiling broadly.

“I love you.” He murmured.

Before she could respond, his lips crashed against hers with bruising force. Their tongues swirled together rhythmically; Remus released Mia’s wrists and tore at her panties as she tangled her hands in his hair. Clumsily, he pulled them down low enough that she could kick them off, their lips never breaking contact. She wrapped her legs around him as he slid into her, sighing against his mouth as his hips rolled against hers. She clawed at his back, digging her nails deeper into his skin the closer she got to release. When she finally finished, she saw stars as she cried out loudly, now scratching so hard she drew blood from him.

“ _Shit—_ you’re bleeding—“she panted “I’m sorry—“

“Do you see the rest of my body?” Remus chuckled “these are nothing.”

She fell asleep rather quickly in his arms that night, drifting off to whisper soft patterns drawn over her skin, and murmurs of affection.

“I love you, Amelia Lupin— I will love you forever and always— I love you, I love you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you thank you thank you for reading thus far! We are nearing the end on this fic; there are only a few more chapters to go! As excited as I am to finish this story, I will be sad to see it end. Thank you to everyone who has left me a kudos or comments, it is so very much appreciated.


	62. Chapter 62

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took a bit longer to get out than normal! It was a bear to write.

There were eyes on the back of her head as Mia poured her morning coffee. She looked over her shoulder; Remus was watching her intently as she moved about the kitchen, his nostrils flaring ever so slightly. She’d caught him staring a few times over the last week or so; he would always look away the moment she saw him, as he did right now.

“Why are you staring at me?” she asked, with a small laugh

“I’m not staring.”

“Yes you are,” she rolled her eyes “if you fancy a shag, all you have to do is say so.”

He chuckled lightly, and then paused. After a moment “You smell different, that’s why I keep looking at you.”

She felt self-conscious all of a sudden; she lifted her shirt collar out and sniffed herself. “Well, I haven’t had a shower yet today—“ she said slowly

“No, it’s not that,” he said quickly, shaking his head “You’ve smelled different for a week or so— the mark, I mean.”

Mia once again sniffed herself, knowing very well she couldn’t smell what he smelled. “What do I smell like…?”

“I don’t know, just different,” He waved his hand, as if to wave off the thought “never mind, forget I said anything— did you see the prophet this morning?”

“No—“ Mia walked over to him and took the newspaper out of his hands. She scoffed incredulously as she read the headline and first few lines of the front page.

**GRINGOTTS ROBBED!**

_Ministry officials say that Gringotts bank was broken into yesterday, May, 1 st 1998\. Aurors believe this to be the work of undesirables Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley…_

“Those little shits broke into Gringotts?!” Mia laughed “I should’ve had them get into my vault while they were there.”

“I have no idea what they were thinking,” Remus said, seemingly not as amused as Mia was. “What could they possibly need to break into a bank for?”

“You know them, so secretive about whatever task Dumbledore left them,” Mia said “As Arthur said, Harry is the best hope we have, trust in that.”

_Trust a 17 year old boy. We’re so fucked._ Mia thought.

“I’m a little short on hope these days.” Remus admitted

Mia sighed, leaning back against the dining room table and tucking the newspaper under her arm. “You and me both.”

* * *

 

Mia stood in her usual post in the middle of the cabin’s adjacent clearing, huffing in frustration.

“Can we _please_ try fire now?”

There was no politeness in her tone. Every morning after breakfast, they would go through the series of elements that Mia had learned to manipulate, skipping fire each time.

 “No. We haven’t tried wind in a while, why don’t—“

Before he would finish his sentence, Remus was knocked onto his back by a large gust a wind, produced from Mia’s palms.

“I don’t need practice with wind, I need to practice _fire_.”

Mia started casting barrier charms around the area she stood, sealing herself inside a protective dome.

“What are you doing?” he asked sharply, brushing the grass of his clothes.

“If the fire gets out of control, I will be the only one who burns to a crisp.”

“Mia, no—“

“Remus just shut up and let me concentrate!” She snapped.

She closed her eyes and flicked her wrist. When she opened her eyes again, a patch of flame ignited before her. She took a few minutes to enlarge and diminish the flame while Remus watched nervously from the sidelines. He remained quiet, letting her focus. Every minute or so, she allowed the flame to grow a little bit larger than it had been before, until she felt she was in control of a bonfire twice her height. She extinguished the patch, and then with a grandiose wave of her hand, a roar of flames took the shape of a wolf, running circles around her for a few minutes before it dissipated with a wave of her hand. She smirked at him, crossing her arms and popping her hip out pretentiously.

“I told you I was ready for fire.”

* * *

“Alright Susan, just a couple more steps…”

Susan was now able to go up and down stairs virtually unassisted. Her gash across her stomach was now healing— slowly, but surely.

“Mum, your doing so well.” Mia said

“Oh sweetheart, there’s no need to get into a fuss about going down a flight of stairs,” Susan said “this recovery has been much longer than I thought.”

“Progress is something to be proud of,” Remus said with a small smile.

Susan’s feet hit the floor at the bottom of the stairs, and she immediately sat down on the first step, breathing heavily.

“When I see Antonin Dolohov next, I will make sure he is the one who cannot walk.”

“Or I’ll just kill him.” Mia muttered, crossing her arms.

“Azkaban is a worse fate than death;” Susan said “killing him would do him a kindness.”

Remus and Mia stayed for dinner at Muriel’s, enjoying a wonderfully prepared roast by Molly. The conversation was lighthearted until someone brought up the Daily Prophet in which Harry, Ron and Hermione were accused of breaking into Gringotts the previous day.

“I just don’t know what in Merlin’s spell book they have gotten themselves into…” Molly said, red faced and shaking her head.

As the sun was setting, Remus and Mia were getting ready to leave for the cabin when a silver streak shot through the wall into the kitchen. A silver hyena materialized on the table, opening its mouth and speaking in Fred’s voice.

_Snape driven out of Hogwarts, You Know Who coming to attack, Reinforcements needed._

Another silver streak shot through the wall, a coyote materializing in the place where Fred’s hyena had stood. The coyote spoke with George’s nearly identical voice.

_Apparate to the Hogs Head Inn, directly inside the pub. There’s a tunnel from there to the castle._

“Oh my…” Molly whispered, staring at the center of the table where the patronuses had been.

 “Well, you heard them— let’s go,” Susan said, struggling to stand.

“Susan, you aren’t strong enough—” Arthur said

“The Order needs me!” Susan cried

“The Order needs you to take care of yourself,” Mia interjected “Mum, stay here, we’ll go.”

Susan stared at her for a minute before sighing in defeat and sinking back into her chair.

“Mia, you be careful— Remus, you make sure she comes home to me.”

“Of course,” Remus said with a nod “Molly, Arthur, you have your wands?”

The Weasley’s nodded and the four of them grabbed hands, disapparating with a soft pop. A moment later, they were standing inside a deserted, grimy bar.

The Hogs Head Inn was certainly no inn Mia would choose to stay at. Everything was coated in thick dust, floorboards weren’t in the best repair, and the place had a certain unwelcome-ness to it. She wasn’t sure what was dustier— the Hogs Head Inn, or 12 Grimmauld Place the first time she stepped inside.

“Upstairs!” the bearded barman gruffed, much in the style of Alastor Moody “upstairs, quickly!”

There was something about the barman’s eyes that seemed familiar, as if he had been an old friend she hadn’t seen in a long time. Mia stared at him for a moment before Remus leaned in and whispered in her ear.

“That’s Dumbledore’s brother— Aberforth.”

They climbed up a set of rickety stairs to a long hallway. Aberforth ushered them into a large, plain bedroom with a portrait of a young woman hanging on the wall. Aberforth pulled the frame open like a door, revealing a large tunnel.

“Climb through— this’ll take you to into the castle.”

“How…?” Mia began

“Magic, you silly girl—“ Aberforth snapped “Now go— quickly!”

The Weasley’s, Remus and Mia climbed into the tunnel, using their wands to illuminate the darkness. The tunnel was shallow, both Remus and Arthur had to crouch significantly.

“Aberforth is a real peach today, huh?” Remus asked rhetorically.

The tunnel was quite lengthy; it took them nearly 15 minutes to walk the entirety. When they finally arrived at the castle, they appeared in a large room— half the size of the Great Hall— filled with sleeping bags and hammocks. They were greeted by a slew of people; Fred, George, Ginny, Kingsley, Bill and Fleur were all congregated in a knot together, while Oliver Wood, Katie Bell, Alicia Spinnet and Angelina Johnson, Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnegan and Luna Lovegood formed another group. Mia made her way straight to Kingsley, curious as to Tonks’s absence.

“Kingsley, where is Tonks?” she asked “Do we know what’s going on?”

“Not yet,” Kingsley replied “Dora is at her parents, with Reggie— I asked her to stay put.”

Harry entered the room, and a silence fell across the crowd.

“Harry, what’s going on?” Arthur asked

“He’s coming, and we’re fighting. We’re meeting in the Great Hall for further instructions.”

The crowd roared; many started charging out of the room, wands drawn and in the air. As the crowd filed out, Remus and Mia stayed behind with Harry, the Weasleys and Kingsley.

“Ginny, you need to go home,” Molly ordered “Susan and Muriel are back at the house—“

“I’m not leaving, my whole family is here!” Ginny cried “I’m in Dumbledore’s army, I chose to fight!”

“A teenager’s gang!” Molly snapped. “You are sixteen, you cannot risk your life to—“

“Molly—“ Remus interrupted “What if Ginny stayed here, that way she’ll be on the scene and can know what’s going on, but she is out of the thick?”

“That sounds fair to me,” Arthur said

“Arthur, but—“

They were interrupted by a person falling out of the passageway, stumbling and making a ruckus. The room fell silent as Percy Weasley got to his feet, adjusting his horned rimmed glasses clumsily.

“Did I miss it? Am I too late? I only just found out…”

The silence was deafening as Mia slunk behind Remus, feeling awkward to be intruding on such a personal family reunion.

“I was a fool!” Percy roared, “I was an idiot! I was a pompous prat! I was a— a—“

“A Ministry loving, family disowning, power hungry moron.” Fred finished for him

Percy shifted awkwardly, looking down at his feet. “Y—yes, I was.”

“Well, you can’t say fairer than that.” Fred shrugged, outstretching his hand to shake Percy’s.

Molly burst into tears, sobbing as she ran towards Percy, pushing Fred aside and throwing her arms around him. Percy patted her back gently, his eyes on Arthur.

“I’m sorry, dad.”

Arthur blinked at Percy a few times, then ran over and joined in on their embrace. Mia stood on her tip toes and whispered in Remus’s ear.

“I’d rather not intrude of this rather personal moment…” she whispered “meet me in your office in 5 minutes.”

She took off for the door, no one else but Remus realized she was leaving.

“Mia—“ he sputtered “Mia, what are you—“

“Five minutes,” she said, turning back “your office.”

* * *

 

The Defense Against the Dark Arts office looked vastly different than when Remus had taken the post. The emerald couch was gone, replaced with a large set of tufted oxblood leather chairs. Dark artifacts were littered all about the office, replacing the spaces where Remus would keep dark creatures in cages or tanks. This office felt cold, uninviting, something that Amycus Carrow probably loved. Mia ran her fingertips across the desk— this seemed to be the only familiar piece of furniture left.

“Wow, Amycus redecorated.”

Remus now stood in the doorway, looking around the room. She frowned at him, leaning back against the oak desk.

“I was hoping the couch would still be here.” she said softly.

“Why, you were hoping we’d have a shag while everyone else is preparing for the impending battle?” He asked teasingly.

She shrugged, smiling mischievously “I wouldn’t’ve minded.”

He made his way over to the window that oversaw the quidditch pitch. He spoke to her with his back turned as he looked out the window and observed the dark grounds.

“There is a good chance one of us isn’t going home today.”

“Remus—“

“Let me finish,” He said, now turning to her with a serious expression. “If it comes down to one of us, it will be me. I need you to promise me that if it comes down to it, do not get yourself killed trying to save me. Save yourself, make sure you get home to your mother.”

Mia’s heart started to pound as a lump formed in her throat. “Don’t talk like that, both of us are going home—“

“Promise me,” he interjected “Promise me you will abide by my wishes?”

Tears prickled her eyes, “I can’t make that promise,” she shook her head “I can’t lose you.”

He stepped over to her and pulled her close, kissing her forehead. “Do you know how much I love you?”

“So much that you would get yourself killed to save me?” Mia asked, her tone laced with venom.

“Exactly.”

He kissed her firmly before she could protest. She wrapped her arms around his neck and allowed him to lift her up by her waist and set her down on the oak desk. Her legs wrapped around his torso as she worked quickly to undo his shirt buttons. They tore each other’s clothes off with the grace of inexperienced teenagers, throwing the garments every which way around the office. He pushed her onto her back and pulled her hips to the edge of the desk.

“You are even more beautiful than the first time I laid you against this desk.”

He ran his hands up her scarred thighs and gripped her hips, pushing his cock firmly into her. The desk rattled underneath her as Remus fucked her with enthralling passion, her moans echoing noisily off the stone walls. She finished in a back arching, toe curling climax that could’ve woken up the whole castle. Remus was right behind her, squeezing himself against her as he stifled a deep grunt.

“Seriously…?”

Kingsley’s deep voice came from the threshold. He was avoiding looking at the two of them in the buff, Mia spread out across the desk for all to see. Mia wrapped her arms over her breasts to cover herself, flashing a guilty grin at Remus.

“Guess we should’ve locked the door…”

“And put up a silencing charm,” Kingsley said “I could hear you two all the way down the hall. Get dressed— we have a battle plan in place and everyone is meeting in the Great Hall in five minutes.”

They were dressed and out of the office just a minute later, Kingsley shaking his head disapprovingly as Remus fidgeted with tucking his shirt in. They started for the Great Hall; Mia had to nearly jog to keep up with Remus and Kingsley’s long strides.

“You and Mia will lead a troop out on to the grounds,” he began “So will Arthur and I…”

Once they arrived at in Great Hall, they took their up behind the Headmaster’s podium at the teacher’s table as Professor McGonagall addressed the students.

“Madam Pomfrey and Mr. Filch will be overseeing the evacuation of underage students—“

Cutting her off, a high cold voice boomed all around them as if it were coming from the walls itself. Mia grabbed Remus’s hand from under the table, gripping tightly.

_“I know that you are preparing to fight. Your efforts are futile.”_

Screams and squeaks of terror erupted all through the Great Hall as the voice of Voldemort continued to speak.

_“You cannot fight me. I do not want to kill you. I have great respect for the teachers of Hogwarts. I do not want to spill magical blood.”_

“Could’ve fooled me…” Mia muttered to Remus in a whisper.

_“Give me Harry Potter, and none shall be harmed. Give me Harry Potter, and I shall leave the school untouched. Give me Harry Potter, and you will be rewarded. You have until midnight.”_

“Potter’s right there!” Pansy Parkinson, seated at the Slytherin table, cried out as the pointed furiously at Harry. “Someone grab him!”

The Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws all stood and turned towards Pansy and the Slytherins.

“Alright, alright!” Professor McGonagall called, “Enough— underage students or those not willing to fight need to file out quickly!”

Kingsley now stepped up to the Headmaster’s podium, addressing the people still remaining seated in the Great Hall.

“We only have a half hour until midnight,” He said “We need to move quickly, The Order of the Phoenix and Hogwarts staff have decided on a battle plan…”

* * *

They stood with wands drawn, waiting for the initial attack. Mia and Remus held hands with their free hand, anxiously waiting for the clock to strike midnight. Mia wasn’t sure exactly when hers and Remus’s bracelets had started vibrating; in the chaos of getting their troop out to their section of the grounds, she had just now become aware of the gentle hum against her skin.

“Alright everyone, the Death Eaters are prepared to kill every last one of us, so fight with all you have. Shoot to kill, or at least stun if you can’t bring yourself to kill. This is not the time to play nice.”

Remus now turned his head and looked down at her, squeezing her hand reassuringly.

“Fight with everything you have. Wand, no wand, water, fire, air— give ‘em hell.”

Mia nodded “I love you,” she whispered, a slight twinge of nervousness in her voice.

He gave her a small smile “and I love you,” he leaned over and kissed her forehead “forever and always.”

“THEY’RE HERE, THEY’RE HERE!” one of their troopers shouted.

The sky looked as if it were illuminated by shooting stars as curses hit the magical barrier surrounding the castle. More and more jets of light hit the protective dome with each passing second, until the barrier began to splinter and crack.

“Wands at the ready!” Remus shouted back “Stay alert!”

The barrier shattered and the grounds were swarmed with Death Eaters, creatures, and giants. Remus and Mia released their hands and stared firing spells every which way, overwhelmed by the action and chaos around them. Mia spotted Fenrir Greyback off a few yards, and sent a few hexes in his direction, pleased when she caught him off guard and sent him flying through the air. _Take that, you vile, carnivorous piece of shit._

It could’ve been ten minutes or ten hours of fighting, she wasn’t sure. It took all her focus to keep her attention on blasting various creatures and Death Eaters aside as well as keep track of where Remus was in relation to her. She made sure to stay just a few feet from him at all times, not wanting to leave his side. Through all the chaos however, she was painfully aware of the vibration against her wrist, her tether and lifeline to him.

She locked eyes with Dolohov a few paces in front of her, feeling immediately angry at seeing the triumphant, smug look on his face.

“Well well well, Mia Roswell, what a pleasure!”

He shot a jet of pink at her, but she had already thrown up a shield. She started shooting any and every spell she could think of, stepping backwards until her back pressed up against Remus’s. He was in a duel with his own Death Eater, and with a few strategic flicks of his wand, the man went flying backwards, hitting his head on some nearby rubble and crumpling to a heap.

A jet of green was now flying directly at Mia; she was about to duck when she felt Remus’s large hand on her chest, shoving her down to the ground. She fell clumsily, twisting her ankle as she collapsed. The jet of green zoomed just over her head, and just past Remus.

“No!” Dolohov shouted angrily.

He started shooting spells at Remus, firing at alarming speed. Remus was doing well, until Dolohov cast another killing curse, this time the jet of green hitting him square in the chest. His eyes glazed over and he crumpled to the ground. The vibration against Mia’s right wrist had ceased, and Remus was motionless.

“Remus?!” Mia shrieked “REMUS?!” She turned her head; Dolohov was smirking at her, amused by what he had just done. “ _Dolohov, you fucking piece of shit!”_

She tried to stand, but collapsed as she placed weight on her rolled ankle. Dolohov shot a few hexes at her that she was able to shield, but Professor Flitwick came to her aid, distracting Dolohov in a magnificent duel of his own. She crawled a few feet over to where Remus lay, shaking him gently.

“Remus, Remus, wake up— please…”

She shook him harder. Nothing. She knew nothing would happen, but the irrational part of her brain thought maybe if he just heard her voice, or if she shook him hard enough…

A strong arm wrapped around Mia’s waist and pulled her away from Remus’s body.

_“No!”_ She kicked and flailed, trying to throw her body weight back towards him, but the arm was stronger. “ _Remus! Remus!!”_

“You can’t help him, Mia. He’s gone.”

Kingsley’s low, stately voice did nothing to make her feel any better. He fought against her wild flailing, dragging her back to the castle.

_“Kingsley Shacklebolt, you put me down!”_ she hollered “Take me back to him, take me back!”

Kingsley dragged her kicking and screaming all the way to the Great Hall, throwing her into a seat and holding her in place.

“Mia, he’s gone— you can’t help him.” he repeated

“He’s all alone out there; I need to be with him! I need to help him!”

“You are going to get yourself killed!” Kingsley cried “I’m sorry—“

“Let me go! _Let me go!”_ Mia screamed at him, seething with anger.

“You need to relax!”  He hollered. “Your fight is over— you’re staying in here, _Molly!”_

She struggled against him until Molly ran over; she started struggling harder when Molly attempted to hold her back.

“We lost Remus.” Kingsley told Molly quietly.

“Oh, oh my…” she said, “Mia? Mia, honey stop struggling…”

“I need to be with him!” Mia screamed, tears now streaming down her face “He’s all alone out there, I need to— I nee—“

She couldn’t speak anymore. She collapsed forward into Kingsley’s arms, burying her face into his shoulder, and spilling every tear she could possibly shed.

* * *

_“You have fought valiantly. Lord Voldemort knows how to value bravery, but you have sustained heavy losses. If you continue to resist me, you will all die one by one. I do not wish this to happen, every drop of magical blood spilt is a waste. Lord Voldemort is merciful. I command my forces to retreat immediately. You have one hour; dispose of your dead with dignity, treat your wounded. Harry Potter, I now speak directly to you. You have permitted your friends to die for you rather than you face me yourself. I will wait for one hour in the Forbidden Forest; turn yourself into me or the battle resumes. This time, I will enter the fray myself, and I will find you. I will kill every last man, woman or child who has tried to conceal you from me.”_

Mia sat on a bench in the great hall, wrapped in a blanket that was not warmed by the comfort of Remus’s heating charms. Her throat was raw, her eyes puffy, she felt like she was in a daze, a trance, a terrible _terrible_ dream.

The well-off were carrying the wounded and the dead, lining up the dead shoulder to shoulder in the middle of the Great Hall, and treating the injured off to the side. As Kingsley and Arthur carried in Remus, Mia leapt to her feet, as they settled his body amongst the rest.

“Mia, why don’t you go sit out in the corridor…?”

She didn’t listen. She kneeled down next to his lifeless body, now pale yet peaceful. She reached out and touched his hand, brushing her thumb across his knuckles. His skin was cold to the touch, his blue eyes staring off to the side, frozen in place. She reached up and gently pulled his eyelids down, closing his eyes. At least with his eyes closed, he didn’t look so dead, just like he was sleeping— just pale from a recent full moon transformation.

“Oh my, no, no NO!”

Molly’s shrieks filled the Great Hall as Fred Weasley was also laid down amongst the dead. She was numb to the sight, feeling no emotion running through her. She was detaching from the scene around her, separating herself from the feelings too painful to feel. She jumped when she felt Kingsley’s hand on her shoulder, both of them watching as Arthur ran to his wife’s side, dropping to his knees with her and sobbing over their son’s body. As a few more bodies were carried in, Kingsley’s grip tightened as he gasped.

“Dora?” he asked, mostly to himself at first “Dora!”

He sprinted towards a pair of wizards carrying in Tonks’s limp body, setting her down gently amongst the place of the dead. Mia watched as Kingsley dropped to his knees, clasping a hand over his mouth in disbelief. She didn’t even feel her feet on the floor as she followed Kingsley over to Tonks.

“She was supposed to be at her mother’s, with Reggie,” He said, his voice an octave higher and strained “She wasn’t supposed to be here— she didn’t stay put like I told her to…”

Mia wrapped her arms around his neck, allowing him to lean his weight into her and sob into the crook of her neck. She stared off aimlessly at the black Hogwarts banners that hung around the Great Hall as she held onto her friend, feeling nothing. She was emotionless, detached, numb.

* * *

 

 

Hours had passed. Tears had been shed over the bodies lined up in a neat row across the floor of the Great Hall. The bodies all had a shimmering gold aura— a preservation spell, to keep the effects of rigor mortis from setting in. There were at least 50 bodies lined up— some beaten and bloody, some pale and peaceful.

_“Harry Potter is dead. He was killed as he ran away, trying to save himself as you lay down your lives for him. We bring you his body as proof you’re hero is gone. The battle is won, you have lost half your fighters, my Death Eaters outnumber you, and the boy who lived is finished. There must be no more war, anyone who continues to resist will be slaughtered, as well as their family. Come out of the castle and kneel before me, you shall be spared, your family shall be spared— and we shall build a new order together.”_

Everyone inside stood and walked towards the castle entrance, muttering and murmuring to each other nervously. (“Could Harry really be dead?” “No, he’s bluffing— there is no way!”). Mia rose, subconsciously linking her arm with Kingsley’s as they shuffled out onto the front steps. The Death Eaters stood in a line with Voldemort in the center, his large snake Nagini draped around his shoulders. Hagrid stood off to the side, cradling Harry in his arms.

“No!” McGonagall shrieked.

The Hogwarts crowd started jeering, shouting insults at the Death Eaters.

“Silence!” Voldemort hissed.

The crowd fell silent. Voldemort chuckled softly as he took a few steps foward. “Harry Potter is dead, as you can see. He was just a simple, silly boy. You were all foolish to follow such a child.” He drummed his fingertips together and smirked “Join us! Join us and you will be forgiven.”

Neville stepped forward, his fists clenched in his hands. “We’ll only join you when hell freezes over! DUMBLEDORE’S ARMY!”

Voldemort’s cackle cut through the crowds roars as he flicked his wand towards a broken window. A brown object zoomed from the castle and into his hand; the sorting hat.

“What is your name, boy?” Voldemort asked.

“That’s Neville Longbottom!” Bellatrix interjected “The boy that has been giving the Carrows such trouble.”

“Ah, Longbottom— you are a pureblood, aren’t you?”

“So what if I am?” Neville shouted contemptuously

“You would make an excellent place amongst out ranks,” Voldemort said “join us, or be an example as to what happens to those who deny Lord Voldemort.”

Neville flipped Voldemort a crude gesture with both hands. Voldemort gritted his teeth, flicked his wand, and the sorting hat flew at Neville, forcing itself onto his head and down over his face. Neville screamed and flailed as the hat burst into flames; he fell to the ground and rolled around to attempt to extinguish the fire.

Anger flooded through Mia as she watched Neville helplessly struggle with the burning hat stuck over his face.  These people were responsible for the death of so many that she loved, and the injuries of many more. His followers and their agendas took the lives of her father, Sirius, Tonks— _Remus._ Now, they make fools out of her friends, using Harry and Neville as sick spectacles. She felt her palms tingle as she gritted her teeth and took a step from her place amongst the crowd.

“Mia? What are you doing?!” Kingsley hissed

Mia didn’t listen. Her brain went on autopilot, her entire mind and body numb as she stepped in front of the crowd, standing in the front of Britain’s most infamous dark wizard.

“Ah, I know this one…” Voldemort said, eyeing her curiously “Amelia Roswell, isn’t it?”

“It’s Mia Lupin, actually” She said, holding her chin up “and I’d like to say something.”

“Go on,” Voldemort said, narrowing his eyes “I’m sure we’d all be… _fascinated_ to hear what you have to say”

“Your people have killed so many of ours tonight. We’ve lost friends, family, loved ones, _Harry_ …” She clenched her hands into fists to keep them from shaking “But we have not lost our minds. You have to be undoubtedly _insane_ to think that we would join you.”

Voldemort let out a bark of laughter “You must forget who you are talking to, ignorant girl— some nerve you have, to give such cheek to Lord Voldemort.”

“I know exactly who I am talking to” She said “Your people are responsible for the deaths of my loved ones— my father, my best friend, my _husband_ ” Her chin quivered as Remus’s face flashed in her mind’s eye. “To slay a beast, you must cut the head off. You, Lord Voldemort are the head that needs cut off.”

“You dare speak his name, you filthy little brat!” Dolohov shouted

“ _Dolohov!”_ Voldemort scolded as he held his hand up “Has anyone ever told you that your mouth would get you into trouble, girl?”

“Every day of my goddamn life,” she muttered, drawing her wand and shooting a stun at Voldemort _“Stupefy!”_

He threw up a shield, his red eyes glaring menacingly as he bared his teeth at her. They began to duel, spells flying all around them as he ordered his followers not to attack—(“She’s mine, do not attack! I am to be the one to kill her!”) The spells flying all around them weren’t enough to defeat the dark wizard. With a flick of her wand, boulders from the rubble raised, launching the giant rocks at him. With a wave of his wand, he blocked the boulders and they shattered into a fine-grit powder against his shield charm.

She started throwing spells wandless, Voldemort’s face twisting in amusement. He raised his wand, a large fire-y serpent swirling around him and launching at Mia. She spun a hand above her head; a tornado formed and vacuumed all the flames up the shaft, suffocating them until they extinguished. Mia sent a gust of strong wind, knocking back the row of Death Eaters except Voldemort onto their backs.  They exchanged a few more stuns and hexes before a flash of green erupted from his wand, headed straight for her.

“Mia!” Hermione cried, her voice jutting out from the crowd.

The world seemed to slow down, everything around her seeming to move at snail pace as her mind recalled the very first lesson Remus had taught her.

_“Can anybody tell me what spell you would use to shield yourself from an attack?”_

_“The Protego charm, which either absorbs the attacking spell or defects it”_

_“Excellent Miss Roswell, you’ve been paying attention! Now, can anyone besides Miss Roswell tell me the only spell the Protego charm cannot block?”_

She had known the answer, despite not being the one to answer his question.  The killing curse, _avada kedavra_ , the very spell headed right for her. She knew she couldn’t block it, and it was too late to jump out of the way. Knowing full well it was useless, she threw up a shield charm anyway, closing her eyes and bracing for the curse to hit her.

Remus’s face flashed in her mind’s eye; his graying, sandy hair falling in his bright blue eyes as he smiled at her— that smile that always made her weak in the knees. She could be with him again, to see him again the moment the curse would hit her and take her life. In this moment, she didn’t fear death— she craved it.

The impact never came. Despite feeling as if hours had passed, Mia opened her eyes a split second later to find Voldemort staring at her, dumbfounded.

“She blocked a killing curse! Mia can block the killing curse!” Someone behind her shouted.

Before she could even process why she wasn’t dead, Neville yanked the singed sorting hat off his face, his skin red and blistered. He pulled a glinting silver sword from inside the hat and charged. The rubies on the hilt sparkled in the red gleam of daybreak as he swung the sword at Voldemort. Rather than hit the dark wizard, he sliced Nagini’s head off clean. The large snake’s head hit the ground with a soft thud; the Hogwarts crowd cheered from behind, and spells started firing from both sides. The battle resumed, some of the fights shifting slowly inside the castle’s entrance hall. Mia threw every spell, hex, and curse she could think of; she sent fire-y wolves charging after Death Eaters, and erected stalagmite structures to block or trap Death Eaters from nearing. She fought with everything she had; willing to jump into any duel, fighting with no fear as she felt there was nothing left for her to lose.

The battle halted as Harry appeared in the center of the entrance hall, standing alive and well with his wand facing Voldemort. The crowd was silent and in awe as they watched the boy they thought dead circle with Voldemort, as if they were two wolves about to tear into each other. Harry jeered, mouthing off to the snake-faced wizard as he explained all the mistakes he had made that would lead him to his demise— at Harry’s hands.

Mia felt nauseas, woozy, and ill as she stood watching the scene before her. She might’ve overdone her magic today; she wanted to sit down, close her eyes and rest, but she fought against it. She watched silently with the others as Harry and Voldemort dueled. It appeared Voldemort’s wand backfired on him, killing him. The crowd roared as he fell backward, motionless and still as stone.

“He did it! Harry did it!”

“He’s dead!”

“It’s over!”

Mia took a few steps back and leaned against the cool castle wall, and sunk down onto her bum slowly. She felt so ill, so weak, but now at least she could take a breath. The war was over. Voldemort’s regime was over. She thought this moment would bring her great joy, but sitting alone on the outskirts of main corridor, she felt nothing. No joy, no relief— just numb.

_“There are things worth dying for.”_ Remus had said to her periodically over the years, mostly when tasks within her duties or the Order were difficult. She had understood this statement— dying for this moment, the moment that would change the wizarding world forever, would have been worth it. The fight for freedom would’ve been worth death, but a question she had continuously creeped into her mind.

Why did everyone _she_ loved have to die?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I killed Remus...
> 
> I honestly went back and forth about killing him, I really did, but I had slated him to die from the beginning and I didn't to change the ending of this story, because I like what I had imagined. I didn't think I would be so emotionally attached to the characters I've killed, but it tears me up! LOL.
> 
> There will be one more chapter, than an epilogue. Thank you thank you thank you for every comment, kudo, and all of you who have stuck with me on this story until the end. I appreciate all of you reading this so so much!


	63. chapter 63

Mia heaved into the toilet for the 5th time this morning. She hoped this would be the last one and the sensation would stop, as there was nothing left in her stomach to throw up. She had vomited every morning this week upon waking up; chalking it up to her impending nerves for today’s ceremony.  
  
She and Remus were both being awarded the Order of Merlin, first class. Kingsley had informed her that as his spouse, she would accept his award on his behalf, directly after accepting hers. She’d been anxious about it ever since; how she was going to hold herself together in front of all those people? She couldn’t even hold food down, or hardly speak of Remus without getting worked up.   
  
She flushed the toilet, washing away all evidence of her sick as she stood to brush her teeth, swaying slightly from a touch of lightheadedness.  She gripped the counter firmly as she reached for her toothbrush. _Must’ve stood up too quick._

She got into the shower, turning the knob to full heat. She allowed the hot water to turn her skin pink as it pounded over her— she hadn’t realized how much she’d missed the strong water heater of the flat until she had returned. Penelope had been still paying the rent for the unit while they were gone, claiming she had a feeling they all would be back sooner than they all thought.

She’d taken a shower this hot after burying Remus, washing away all the dirt and grime she had accumulated laying him to rest. She had insisted burying him by the cottage and digging the grave herself— without magic. It’d taken her hours to dig 6 feet deep, but the work calmed her nerves. Many had offered to help— Kingsley, Arthur, Bill, Harry, Eric; but Mia refused. This was something she had wanted to do on her own.

Many gathered around the grave site to pay their respects, pretending not to be put off by Mia covered in dirt, draping herself over the pine casket that would be laid to rest inside the freshly dug earth. Many offered again to bury him for her, so she could go get a hot shower and some rest, but she refused help once again. She was out shoveling dirt back in the hole until the moon was raised high in the sky, and she was caked in dirt and sweat. Tears had streamed down her filthy face as she waved her hand to etch words on a large boulder placed at the head of the grave.

_Remus Lupin_

_1960-1998_  
  
The water turning cold forced her out of the shower. She was too overwhelmed to choose which dress she would don for today’s ceremony just yet, so she settled with throwing on her bathrobe and twisting her hair up into a towel.

Eric sat at the dining room table reading the muggle newspaper as Penelope was frying pan of eggs. They’d returned to Britain a couple days after the battle, upon receiving an owl from Susan about the news of the casualties. Mia had missed seeing them tremendously, and was thankful she didn’t have to return to the flat by herself.  
  
“Good morning!” Penelope said cheerily “eggs?”  
  
Mia’s stomach rolled irritably as she envisioned eggs coming back up into the toilet. “No, I’m good” she said, sitting down at the table across from Eric.  
  
Penelope frowned, and then set a plate of eggs down in front of her against her request.    
  
“Why’d you ask if you knew I’d say no, but give them to me anyway?” Mia grumbled  
  
“Because Remus would want you to choose to have breakfast.” 

Mia sighed, hunching over her nauseating plate as she glanced at the newspapers on the table in front of her. The headlines were big, bold and nearly jumping off the page at her.

**YOU KNOW WHO DEFEATED AT THE HANDS OF HARRY POTTER**

**KINGSLEY SHACKLEBOLT NAMED MINISTER OF MAGIC**

**SUSAN ROSWELL NAMED HEAD OF AUROR DEPARTMENT**

**MINERVA MCGONAGALL NAMED HEADMISTRESS OF HOGWARTS**

These titles had been in various issues of the Daily Prophet over the last month, and Mia had insisting in keeping them all. She read over them again and again as she begrudgingly ate her eggs. An uncomfortable cramping in her lower abdomen was starting, causing her to wince and groan and she shifted.

“You feel alright?” Penelope asked, joining them at the table. “You look uncomfortable.”

“Just a little crampy today, that’s all.”

Mia refocused her attention back onto the papers, reading the article featuring her mother for the 100th time.

“So do we get to use toilets to get to the ceremony today?” Eric asked through a mouthful of cereal.

“What?” she asked, looking up from her pile of newspapers.

“The toilets,” he repeated “you used to take toilets to get to work, right? How cool would it be to flush yourself down a pipe? Do we get to use them today?”

Mia was about to laugh and inform him they would _not_ be using toilets anymore to get into the Ministry of Magic when her stomach rolled and churned irritably. She felt the threatening sensation building in her as she jumped up from her seat.

“Speaking of toilets…”

She hardly made it to the bathroom fast enough before the eggs came back up, and into the toilet.

* * *

 

 “Thank you all for gathering here today—“

Kingsley looked completely in his element standing behind the Minister’s podium. He wore grand robes of blue and purple; Mia was certain he was the best dressed wizard in the entire auditorium. Minister of Magic would suit him well.

“We are recognizing the valiance and bravery of some individuals here today, as well as those we lost, during the battle at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.”

There were butterflies in Mia’s stomach. She felt extremely uncomfortable sitting on a stage in front of a whole slew of people— being gawked at— as she felt.

Not only was her stomach fluttering nervously, she didn’t particularly feel much better than she had at breakfast. Her lower abdomen still felt crampy, and she was unbelievably tired. She could go for a troll-sized latte from Calista Calderon’s right about now.

“First, I’d like to recognize Minerva McGonagall, for her unwavering allegiance to the Order of the Phoenix, as well as her actions during the Battle of Hogwarts.”

Professor McGonagall walked briskly over to Kingsley and shook his hand. The crowd clapped wildly, whistling and cheering until McGonagall took her seat back amongst the row of awardees.

“This next Order of Merlin, First Class goes out to Amelia Lupin, for her outstanding magical ability, bravery on the battlefield, and allegiance to the Order of the Phoenix.”

The crowd cheered as Mia rose to her feet; she forced an awkward smile at Kingsley. After shaking his hand and accepting her plaque, she stepped to the side of the podium and remained standing.

“I’ve asked Mia to remain standing, as to accept the next award on behalf of her husband—“

Mia’s stomach churned at hearing Remus’s name. She squeezed her own plaque to her chest, shifting on her heels uncomfortably.

“Remus Lupin is the first werewolf to receive the Order of Merlin, First class—“

Mia didn’t hear anything else that Kingsley was saying, as she was fighting tremendously not to burst out into sobs in front of the crowd. _Hold it together, Mia. Hold it together._

She accepted the award and hurried to her seat, eager to get out of the spot light. She looked down at the two plaques in her lap, staring at Remus’s name etched into the marble. A werewolf recipient for this award would hopefully do wonders for lifting the stigma on them, as Remus receiving this high honor showed the wizarding world werewolves were more than just animals. She hoped that many would have an improved quality of life, and wouldn’t been seen as social outcasts or treated unfairly.

Her mind flashed to the 19 year old boy begging Umbridge for mercy the previous year. Jasper Hughes was treated unfairly, and was rotting in prison for something he couldn’t control. Kingsley had made so many strides in weeding out unfairness and corruption in just the month of holding office, Mia wondered maybe there would be something he could do for Hughes as well.

“This last award is for Nymphadora Tonks,” Kingsley’s voice started to crack as he spoke “Being accepted on her b—behalf by her mother Andromeda Tonks, for her— her—“

Kingsley started to choke, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the sides of the podium, trying to hold himself together. Mia wondered if Kingsley had felt the same looming anxiety over announcing Tonks’s award as she had over receiving Remus’s. She felt for him in this moment— she knew what he was going through.

All her anxiety melted away in her concern for Kingsley. She needed to be here for him, to help him through this. She rose and walked over to behind the podium, placing a hand on Kingsley’s shoulder.

“Let me.” She whispered.

Kingsley blinked at her for a moment, then nodded and stepped to the side.

“You’ll have to excuse Minister Shacklebolt,” Mia said into the microphone, her voice smooth and steady “This was the mother of his child.”

Mia looked down at the script on the podium and took a deep breath before speaking.

“This next Order of Merlin, First class is for Nymphadora Tonks, being accepted on her behalf by her mother, Andromeda Tonks. Awarded for her undying loyalty to the Order of the Phoenix, and heroic actions on the battlefield.”

Andromeda accepted the award from Kingsley, tears glistening in her eyes as she hugged him and kissed him on the cheek.  Kingsley stepped back over to the podium and took a deep breath, composing himself before speaking. Mia reached for Kingsley’s hand, intertwining her fingers with his. She gave him a reassuring squeeze, and he in return.

“Thank you all for attending this prestigious ceremony. We thank all the individuals that were honored again today for their services…”

Once the ceremony disbanded, Mia pulled Kingsley aside before anyone could swarm him with handshakes and condolences.

“I have a favor to ask.” She said quietly.

“Sure, anything.” Kingsley said “What do you need?”

Mia shifted awkwardly “It’s a ‘you’re the Minister of Magic’ favor…”

Kingsley raised his brow, giving her an appraising look.

“There is a werewolf in Azkaban— Jasper Hughes— he doesn’t deserve to be there. Umbridge convicted him of murdering a family during the full moon, but he wasn’t using wolfsbane at the time. He couldn’t help it. He’s serving ten years, but I want you to pardon him.”

Kingsley looked at her for a moment before speaking “I can’t just issue pardons because I feel like it. If he was convicted—“

“His trial was unfair,” Mia interrupted “I scribed for it— he was convicted due to prejudice. Please, Kingsley, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t believe in this 110%.”

Kingsley pondered this for a moment. “Alright, let’s go look at the case file— _if_ it seems that this trial was truly unfair based on my judgement of the case, I’ll issue a pardon, and we’ll go get him out this afternoon.”

“We?”

“Well, yeah,” Kingsley smiled “you _really_ want to hang around here and let people tell you how sorry they are for your loss?”

“Hell no.” Mia said with an awkward chuckle.

Kingsley wrapped an arm around her shoulders “then come on— let’s go find that file.”

* * *

Azkaban was smack dab in the middle of the North Sea. An island of misery all by its lonesome, build on a patch of rock that were constantly being hit by crashing waves. The prison was filthy on the inside, but Mia was surprised to find it full of not only prisoners, but a cleaning crew that was scrubbing the place down from head to toe. There was not a single Dementor for miles around, either.

“I banished the use of Dementors as guards last week,” Kingsley told her as they walked down the hall of the prison. “I don’t aim to make this place a cozy getaway, but I would at least like it to be humane— and slightly hygenic.” Kingsley scoffed and shook his head disapprovingly at the grime build up in the cracks of the walls. “How _this_ was ever acceptable…”

They ignored the jeers and wolf whistles at Mia as they made their way down the hall. Mia clutched a small purse tightly to her; she’d sobbed profusely as she packed the last of Remus’s wolfsbane stash into it, feeling an odd attachment to the supply of potions, as if giving them away was giving a piece of Remus away.

“So, if you apply for an Auror position, you’ll get to do this sort of thing all the time.” Kingsley said casually. “You are going to apply this fall, yeah?”

“I think so,” Mia shrugged “I haven’t really thought much of the future, to be honest.”

“I know you’ve had it rough— believe me, I understand,” he said “But I want you to think about it. I know you want this— Remus would want this for you.”

She and Kingsley stopped in front of the second to last cell in the block. A blonde young man covered in dirt crouched in the corner, covering his face.

“Jasper Hughes?—” Kingsley asked.

The prisoner looked up; his face was pale, thin, a mixture of the sickly that Sirius looked the first time she’d met him, and Remus’s post full moon peaky.

“—you’re coming with us.”

“I—I don’t understand…” Hughes squeaked

“You’ve been pardoned.” Kingsley said “You’re going home— you can thank Mia here, she’s the one that requested your pardon.”

Hughes squinted at her “Y—you were at my hearing…”

“I was,” Mia said, “I’m sorry for the way you were treated— I regret I wasn’t able to help you sooner.”

Hughes nostrils flared; not in an angry, controlling temper sort of way, but curiously. Mia was certain he was now picking up on the scent of her mark. Kingsley flicked his wand, and the cell door opened. Hughes stepped out of the cell nervously, his eyes darting back and forth between the two of them. Kingsley stuck his hand out to shake.

“I’m Kingsley Shacklebolt, Minister of Magic.  I don’t know how much news you’ve had access to in here, but there’s been a change in power.”

Hughes shook Kingsley’s hand cautiously. He turned to Mia, but did not raise his hand. He furrowed his brow slightly, the dirt on his face creasing in his forehead lines.

“I—I’m sorry, I can’t.—“

“You can’t shake my hand,” Mia said understandingly, rubbing her neck instinctively. “My husband was a werewolf, he marked me.”

“ _Was_ a werewolf?” Hughes asked

“He died, fighting in the war.” Mia said, and then handed a bag to Kingsley to hand to Hughes before he could give her his condolences. “This is wolfsbane— we kept a stash for him. I regret that it’s only a year or so supply, but I thought you might like to have this.”

“ohmygod,” Hughes said under his breath. “How can I ever thank you?”

“No need to thank me— I just want this potion to go to good use.”

Hughes’ eyes were swimming with tears as he stared inside the bag of bright blue vials. Mia felt a surge of pride for helping the werewolf, and a weight on her conscience was lifted.

“Come on, are you hungry, Mr. Hughes? We’d like to treat you to a proper meal.”

* * *

 

_What a hero Tom was become now! He did not go skipping and prancing, but moved with a dignified swagger, as became a pirate who felt that the public eye was on him. And indeed it was; he tried not to seem to see the looks or hear the remarks as he passed along, but they were food and drink to him._

Mia sat on the couch, legs tucked up underneath her as she read Remus’s copy of The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. A steaming cup of earl grey sat on the coffee table in front of her, next to Remus’s copy of The Great Gatsby. That book was next on her list to read; she wanted to read all his favorites, as this made her feel close to him.

“Mia? Can we talk to you for a moment?”

Penelope and Eric were standing in front of the television, holding hands. Mia looked up, snapping the book shut. “What’s up?” she asked

 “We, uhm—“ Penelope looked at Eric for a moment before continuing. “We wanted to talk to you— about us going back to the states…”

Mia shifted in her seat, furrowing her brow. “You don’t need my permission to go back.”

“I know, but we—“ Penelope stopped for a moment again “We want to go back permanently.”

“I got a job offer— it’s a good one,” Eric interjected “But we know things are hard right now, with Remus gone—“

Mia held her hand up to silence him. “Please don’t stay for me. If this is what you both want, by all means you should do it.”

“You can come with us,” Penelope offered “We can get a flat, the three of us.”

“Thank you, but I can’t,” Mia said “I can’t move that far from Remus.”

“Mia, Remus is—“

“I know he’s dead!” Mia snapped “I watched him die. I buried him myself. You don’t need to remind me.”

Eric and Penelope were quiet for a moment as Mia picked up her mug of earl grey, sipping carefully.

“I don’t want to be far from his body,” she said softly “I need to be close to him— I’ll come for holidays, but I don’t want to move permanently.”

Eric and Penelope nodded, not pushing the subject any further.

“When do you guys move?”

“Well, Eric still has to call and accept...” Penelope shifted awkwardly.

“But most likely next week,” Eric finished for her “they wanted me right away.”

“Congratulations,” Mia said, forcing herself to smile “I’m happy for you guys.”

Penelope breathed a sigh of relief. “We’re going out for a pizza; you want us to bring you anything?”

“No, I’m alright,” Mia said “Thanks.”

Eric and Penelope made their way to the front door. Eric held the door open for Penelope, but while he was half way out the door, he turned back to Mia.

“Mia? I’m really sorry, about Remus.”

 She frowned, nodding. “Me too.”

She read until her eyelids felt heavy, and the words on the page started to blur. She needed sleep, but did not want to experience the new recurring nightmare that had made its way into her dream reel. She tried to fight her fatigue and continued reading, but when she read a whole chapter and had no idea what she had just read, she knew it was time to turn in.

Mia snapped the book shut and set it atop the coffee table and retreated into the bedroom. She winced and gripped the dresser as she was hit with a wave of abdominal cramping. She breathed through the cramp, then changed into her pajamas once the pain subsided.

She climbed into bed and opened her nightstand drawer, rummaging for a pain potion when she came across a picture of Tonks from the night before her wedding, drooling all over the pillow. Mia had meant to use this picture to prank her friend at a later date, but never got the chance to. The sight of the photograph brought tears to her eyes— she couldn’t look at it right now, it was too much. She waved her hand and her photo album came zooming out from under the bed. She opened it to a blank page, and placed the photo inside. She snapped the cover shut and waved her hand, and the photo album disappeared back under the bed and out of sight.

With another wave of her hand, a vial of pain potion came zooming from the bathroom. She caught it with ease, and downed it in one gulp. She was so exhausted that she fell asleep seconds after her head hit the pillow.

 

\---

“Wotcher, Mia! How’s my hair? Do I look as pretty as you always do?”

Mia opened her eyes; her bedroom looked the same, but brighter— whiter. She turned her head to see Tonks sitting next to her, hair long, straight and dark just like Mia’s. She blinked vacantly at Tonks a few times as she sat up.

“Tonks…?” she said hoarsely “What the…”

“Surprise!” Tonks smiled brilliantly “A few of us wanted to drop by to say hello.”

“A few of us…?”

“My, you certainly have grown into a beautiful young woman…“

Mia looked to the doorway of the bedroom to see Miranda standing there, leaning against the door frame.

“…Miranda?” She blinked just as vacantly at the tall, thin blonde as she had Tonks. “I don’t understand, what’s going on?”

“Just as Tonks said, we wanted to stop by to say hello:”

Miranda stepped inside and sat at the edge of the bed, smiling at her. Next, John entered the room, taking a seat next to Miranda and putting his arm around her.

“Hey kiddo,” John said “How are you doing with everything?”

“Dad?” John nodded. Mia swallowed hard and shrugged her shoulders “I’m… managing, I guess.”

“Yes, we’ve seen,” Miranda said, her eyes twinkling much like Albus Dumbledore’s always did “lean on your mother for support. Susan loves you fiercely, and she knows much of loss that can help you.”

“I’m sorry things got so complicated with her…”

John shook his head “Everything is clear in the afterlife. I understand why your mother did what she did. I just regret all the fights we had, since I was none the wiser.”

“He’s not lying; I can’t believe the omniscience I have now!”

Sirius was standing in the doorway now, smiling that wide, toothy grin that was his signature. Tears started to sting her eyes at the sight of Sirius. She was so happy to see him; to see all of them.

“Sirius?!”

“Hey kitten,” he sat down on the bed closer to her than Miranda and John had. “Pretty badass, all the wandless magic you’ve been learning. I told you that you were one talented witch.”

Mia felt like she was floating. She was so happy to see the four of them— but someone was missing.

“If you all are here, then is—“

She looked up, her breath catching in her throat as her eyes fell upon Remus now standing in the doorway.

“You really think I wouldn’t come by to say hello?”

Remus looked so handsome; his complexion was the healthiest Mia had ever seen— there was not a single trace of lycanthropy about him. His hair was neatly pushed back out of his eyes and much less gray than when he had died.

Mia couldn’t even say his name. She started crying as she reached her arms out for him, taking comfort in feeling Tonks’s hand rub her back gently. Remus glided to her, taking a seat on the bed in front of Sirius and pulling her into a hug. She could smell his usual cologne against his sweater; feel his stubble Velcro-ing to her hair. She wanted to stay in his arms forever. She never wanted him to let her go.

“I’m so sorry I had to go.” he whispered. He pulled back and brushed her hair off her neck, frowning slightly as his thumb ran along her mark. “Do you know how much I love you?”

“Enough to take a killing curse for me?” Mia said flatly, through her sobs.

“Yes,” he said “there are things worth dying for— namely, you are worth dying for.”

“I wish I wasn’t,” she said, interlacing her fingers with his “I don’t want to live without you. I—I can’t live without you.”

Remus smiled slightly at this “There are things worth living for, as well. _You_ have things worth living for.”

“I don’t understand, without you…”

She trailed off as Remus smiled oddly at her. He didn’t elaborate, but she didn’t push. She was so happy to have Sirius, Tonks, Remus, John and Miranda all here with her, but she knew in the back of her mind that there was no way this was possible.

“How are you all here, exactly?”

“You’re sleeping,” Sirius said “But we all thought you’d enjoy this dream more than the others you’ve been having.”

How did they know of the nightmare she’d been having almost every night since the battle?— The scene of Remus falling to the ground, the vibration of her bracelet ceasing, the memory of being ripped away from his still body.

“So… you all watch me?”

“We can see things, yes,” John said “understand your emotions, thoughts and feelings more than we could when we were living.”

“…You can read my mind?”

“Not quite,” Remus said “We just understand.”

Mia frowned at them all, dissatisfied with their vagueness.

“I want you to make sure you eat,” Remus continued “and no booze to dampen your emotions, lean on the people who love you instead— your mother, Penelope, Kingsley.”

Mia nodded, “Alright.” She said, fighting though the lump in her throat. She started to feel her abdominal cramps return— odd, to feel this sensation while she was dreaming.

“Sweetheart, you are about to wake up now.” Miranda said softly “Just remember that we all are with you, and everything will be alright.”

“What? No, I don’t want to wake up— I want to stay here, with all of you.”

“You can’t,” said Tonks gently, “you don’t belong with us yet.”

Tears streamed down her cheeks again “But I love you all. I don’t want to lose you all again.”

“You’re not losing us,” Sirius chuckled “We are with you always, even if you can’t see us.”

Mia wiped her eyes, nodding and choking as she swallowed. Remus leaned forward and kissed her forehead gently. His lips were warm and soft against her skin; she closed her eyes, taking note of everything she felt in this moment to remember it when she woke up.

“I love you, and I am with you,” he whispered, pulling away just an inch from her face “We all are. Forever and always.” He sat up straight again then smirked. “Padfoot, what do you think about Grace?” he asked Sirius, but not taking his eyes off Mia.

“I love it.” Sirius said grinning.

“What about you lot? Tonks, Miranda, John?”

“Love it.” John said, smiling broadly.

“Absolutely perfect.” Miranda added.

“Beautiful!” Tonks said

Mia furrowed her brow “What’s Grace?” she asked, puzzled.

Tonks leaned in close, speaking right in her ear. “Wake up.”

She felt herself waking up— her body started tingling, her vision hazing.

“No wait, I’m not ready to wake up yet—“ Mia cried “what’s Grace? Wait— I don’t want to wake up yet!”

“Wake up.” Tonks repeated.

Her eyes flew open, disappointed to see she was alone in her dark bedroom. Her forehead tingled where Remus’s lips had touched her; she raised her hand and touched the very spot, her heart panging with loneliness. She shifted to sit up, groaning as a sharp cramp split across her abdomen. It felt like her time of the month cramps, but much worse than usual.

She felt moisture between her legs— had she started her period while she slept? Now that she thought of it, she wasn’t sure when her last period had been. She’d always been irregular, but she wasn’t sure she’d ever gone this long without having one. In the stress of the battle and aftermath, she hadn’t been keeping track of such trivial things.

She pulled the bedsheets off her, gasping at the sight of her sitting in a pool of blood. Something was wrong; this wasn’t a normal amount for starting her period. Her heartbeat pounded in her ears, she felt lightheaded and nauseas as the sight of this much blood. Another wave of cramps hit her, doubling her over.

“PENNY!” she screamed.

Penelope flew into the bedroom, Eric close on her heels. “Whats wrong? What happ—Ohmygod,” Penelope’s face drained of color “What happened? Why are you bleeding?”

“I don’t know— AHH!”

The pain was too much. Her vision clouded, her hearing muffled, and her world went black. It seemed like a moment later she opened her eyes to a sterile white room inside St. Mungo’s. She groaned as she sat up; her mouth felt like she swished with acetone. A medi-witch walked in with a tray of potions, smiling as she saw her.

“Oh, Mrs. Lupin, good, you’re awake—“ the medi-witch said “I’ll get the Healer.”

Mia blinked at the medi-witch as she sat down the tray, the hustled out of the room. She looked around, there were no visitors— was Penelope waiting on the 5th floor? Was anyone else here? How did she even get here? What was wrong?

An older man in lime green robes entered the room, knocking gently on the door. “Hi, Amelia Lupin?” he was undoubtedly a Healer, based on his uniform.

“Mia,” she corrected him, her voice hoarse. “How did I get here?”

“Mia— my apologies. A—“ he glanced at the chart attached to the edge of her hospital bed “a Penelope Clearwater brought you in— you had some pelvic bleeding, and had lost consciousness.”

“What happened? Why was I bleeding?”

“Sometimes bleeding can occur in your condition,” the Healer said “We don’t always know why, but we are certain that it was an isolated event, potentially from stress. The heartbeat is strong, so we aren’t worried.”

“Condition?” Mia said confused “I don’t understand.”

The Healer furrowed his brow, and then pulled the clipboard chart from the front of the bed, examining it for a minute.

“Yes… were you not aware of your condition?” he said, not looking up from the clipboard until he finished his sentence.

“What condition?” Mia said impatiently “What are you talking about?”

The Healer opened and closed his mouth a couple times before realizing that she indeed did not know what he was talking about. His cheeks flushed pink as he blinked at her.

“Oh— Oh, I am so sorry, I— I didn’t realize you didn’t know—“ he stammered, looking mortified “Mia, you’re pregnant.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh!! I can't believe this story is finally finished. I don't have enough thank you's for all of you who have seen this story though its entirety with me. Thank you. Thank you so very fucking much. I put a lot of blood, sweat and tears into this fic, and I hope you all enjoyed.
> 
> I know I'm a total asshole for ending on a cliffhanger, which is why I will have an epilogue for you all in a few days. I will bring you all some closure, I promise!!


	64. EPILOGUE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the epilogue as promised! Its done in a vingette-style (or snapshots? snippets? whatever.) of moments though Mia's life over the next 19 years.

_WINTER 1999_

“Push Mia! Push!”

Mia groaned as sweat dripped down her face. Her legs were strapped into stirrups as she bared her entire lower half for a team of Healers and medi-witches. She gripped Susan’s hand with one hand, and the metal handrail of the hospital bed with the other.

“Come on, Mia—“ a medi-witch instructed “one more big push!”

Mia let out a moaning scream as she pushed with all her might. She felt the pressure between her legs subside as a baby’s cry split through the room. Tears flooded down her face at the sound of the cry— it was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard. It was the cry of her child— of her and Remus’s child.

“Congratulations, it’s a girl!”

The medi-witch handed her the baby girl, wrapped up in a soft pink blanket. She was no longer crying, but stirring and cooing, as if knowing she was now in her mother’s loving arms. Mia cradled the baby, feeling overwhelmed with joy, love and affection.

“She’s beautiful, sweetheart,” Susan said softly, rubbing her upper back as she leaned in close to observe the infant “What’s her name?”

Mia’s heart fluttered as she instantly knew the name of the precious life in her arms. Tears began to stream down her face as she smiled down at her beautiful, perfect daughter.

“Grace— her name is Grace.”

 

_FALL 2000_

“We congratulate these Aurors on their completion of the rigorous academy, and would like to present them with their badges and partner assignment.”

Susan stood behind the obsidian podium of the Ministry’s auditorium, announcing each new Auror and their partner assignments. They’d spent ten months training for this moment and after all the rigorous training exercises and tests, Mia and the other recruits were ready to start working. She waited patiently as partners were named, eagerly awaiting her name to be called.

“Mr. Ronald Weasley and Mr. Neville Longbottom!”

Ron and Neville jumped up from their chairs, eagerly accepting their badges and shaking hands with Susan, then with each other.

“And finally, Mr. Harry Potter and Mrs. Amelia Lupin!”

Mia and Harry followed suit, eagerly accepting their badges. Once the ceremony had disbanded and they were backstage, Harry pulled Mia into a one arm-side hug, squeezing gently.

“So, partners, eh?” Harry said

Mia smiled sheepishly “I hope you weren’t disappointed Mum didn’t pair you with Ron…”

“No, no— I’m pleased to be working with you—”

“Mummy! Mummy!!”

Grace cut their conversation off, her little legs running up to Mia with impressive speed for an 18-month old. Kingsley was hustling behind her, dragging 3 year old Reggie with him by the hand.

“Ah there’s my Gracie!—“ she pulled Grace into her arms with a playful roar, peppering her giggling daughter with kisses all over her face. “How was she during the ceremony? She behave?”

“Oh yeah, she and Reggie kept themselves entertained with some of George’s new kids toys. He asked me if Reggie could test some of the new line before they hit the shelf— the toys are _brilliant_ ,” Kingsley said, grinning “Congratulations on your partner assignments, I think you’ll like what we have planned for you two.”

“Thanks _Minister,_ ” Harry said playfully “any insight on Mia and I’s first assignment?”

“Just tracking down some old Death Eaters that haven’t been seen since the final battle—“ Kingsley turned to Mia  “Our most sought after fugitive is Antonin Dolohov.”

“Good,” Mia gritted her teeth “I’d be delighted to have a chat with him.”

 

_SPRING 2001_

“Alright Kingsley, she took a nap at 3pm, but it was a short one so I’m sure she’ll be ready for bed—“

“Mia, I got it,” Kingsley laughed “Go, go— I know her nap schedule; we do this all this time.”

Mia relaxed her posture. “Thank you, Kingsley. I’ll be back first thing in the morning, for her and Reggie.”

Mia turned to leave when Kingsley called her name, drawing her back.

“Why don’t you just move in here?” he asked “you and Grace?”

“Wait what?”

“We are constantly dropping our kids off at each other’s house,” he said “wouldn’t it be so much easier if we were all under one roof? Plus, this house is a bit large for just Reggie and me.”

“That actually,” Mia said slowly “would be a _fantastic_ idea…”

 

_SUMMER 2002_

“Hi everyone, I’m Mia Lupin, the Matron of Honor this evening. I am honored to stand before you all as we wish Penelope and Eric the happiest of congratulations. Penelope and I have been best friends since we were 11 years old…”

Mia had been nervous about giving a speech at Eric and Penelope’s wedding, but once she got to talking, her nerves melted away. As she was finishing up her heartfelt words, Grace went running by next to her, picking up an unknown object and placing it in her mouth.

“No Gracie, don’t eat that!” Mia snatched Grace up quickly, ripping the object (which was revealed to be a rock brought inside by someone’s shoe) out of her mouth. She picked her up, situating her on her hip as she turned back to the crowd and smiled sheepishly.

“Kids— they’ll eat just about anything.”

The crowd laughed as Grace began to cry. A few scattered aws erupted as Mia cradled the toddler close. She chuckled into the microphone.

“Anyway— let us toast to Penelope and Eric, may you two love and cherish each other forever, and always.”

“To Penelope and Eric!” the crowd toasted.

The noise in the room returned as the tables idle chatter resumed. Mia grabbed a napkin off the table in front of her and dried the tears from Grace’s face.

“Gracie baby, you can’t eat things off the floor, that’s yucky.”

“Sorry, mummy.” Grace sniffled

Mia set Grace down and kissed her cheek “Alright sweetling, go play with the other kids.”

Mia watched as Grace trotted off, smiling at the way her ironed ringlets bobbed as she ran. Her hair was light, the same sandy color Remus’s had been— sans grey, of course. She slid back into her chair next to Penelope, and took a gulp of wine. Penelope scooted closer to her, draping one of her lace-sleeved arms over Mia’s shoulders.

“She looks more and more like Remus every day.”

Mia smiled sadly “I know.”

“How are you doing? With everything? I regret that I’ve been so busy planning this wedding I haven’t checked in as much.”

“Nothing of it,” Mia said, shaking her head “Well, I’m not sure why everyone calls the twos terrible, because three is much _much_ worse,” Both Penelope and Mia laughed “Work’s stressful, we haven’t been able to track down Dolohov or even any of the other Death Eaters. It’s like they disappeared.”

“Maybe they’re dead?” Penelope offered.

“No, I don’t think so,” Mia said “Kingsley thinks they are just hiding themselves too well.”

“How is living with Kingsley now? He a clean roommate?”

“Well the kids aren’t clean,” Mia laughed again “but he’s been great. It’s made things a lot easier together, living together. We are basically an old married couple, without being a married couple.”

“Is there something there?” Penelope asked, smiling slightly

“No Penelope, you know I can’t have that.”

“Well, you could, just without sex…”

Mia let out a bark of laughter “Kingsley is family, and not in a husband way. We moved in together to help raise our kids, because being a single parent is hard, that’s all.”

“Alright, alright,” Penelope said, holding her hand up “I just worry about you getting lonely.”

She was lonely, but there was not much she could do about that. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.” They were silent for a minute before Mia changed the subject “I’m actually curious on your opinion on something.”

“Sure, what’s that?”

“Every full moon I think of what Remus went through, and I think of all the werewolves that still go through these painful transformations. What if I opened a place that they could use as a safe shelter? Provide wolfsbane and a hot meal? A comfortable and private place to transform?”

Penelope shrugged “it sounds nice— lord knows you have the money for it.”

Thanks to John’s enormous life insurance policy, and his life saving, she indeed did have the money for it. Mia leaned back in her chair, fidgeting with her glass of champagne on the table in front of her.

“I could maybe get sponsors too— I think I could get Kingsley to have the Ministry back it up, or St. Mungo’s. I don’t know; I just can’t get the idea out of my head.”

“Do it,” Penelope said simply “If you think it’s a good idea, do it. I’m sure the world would be a better place for werewolves if they had something of this sort.”

 

 

_SUMMER 2003_

Mia’s heartbeat was in her ears as she stepped inside the dank cave. Would any of them want her help? Or if they would want it, would they take it? Had they been so influenced by Greyback that they all actually _enjoyed_ turning into killing machines once a month?

There were at least a hundred of them; the facility was only built to house 75— what if they all wanted to come? _These werewolves will be touchy— think you’re trying to register them, capture them. You’ll be lucky to get just one._

“Oi! Looks like we have a guest!” a werewolf called eagerly “She’s a pretty one, too!”

Within a second, she was circled by the pack of werewolves, all leaving her a circumference of a few feet of breathing room. The entire pack’s nostrils were flaring, undoubtedly picking up on the scent of Remus’s mark.

“A _marked_ guest,” the same werewolf said, this time with hesitation and a touch of irritation. “What are you doing here, girly? Lost your mate?”

“My mate is dead,” she said, the words making her stomach churn. “I’m here to see all of you.”

Many of the werewolves cocked their head to the side curiously, a few narrowed their eyes skeptically, and a few blinked vacantly.

“I have a place, a place for all of you to use during the full moon. It’s a comfortable place transform, with a dose of wolfsbane and hot meals before and after. It’s available for all of you, for free, if you would like.”

“What, Is this your way to keep track of us? To get us to go onto a registry?” a werewolf from the back of the crowd called.

“No. Call me a bleeding heart liberal, but I just want to help. I know how painful it is, sympathetically of course, to transform each month. I’ve seen the toll it takes on all your bodies, short and long term. I’m just a woman that wants to help.”

Mia waved her hand; a rain shower of flyers fell all around the werewolves, stating the facility’s location and overview of amenities.

“Come, or don’t come. Whatever you chose is fine, but my place is open to all of you.”

That next full moon, 50 extremely skiddish werewolves from the cave pack showed up at the shelter.

“Welcome wolves,” Mia called, addressing them all “Welcome to hopefully the most comfortable full moon yet.”

 

_FALL 2005_

**ANTONIN DOLOHOV CAPTURED BY AURORS, SENTENCED TO LIFE IN AZKABAN FOR THE SECOND TIME**

Mia read the Daily Prophet front page article and sipped her morning coffee, admiring hers and Harry’s handiwork from the day before. Sounds of Reggie and Grace playing in the living room echoed throughout the house, idle noise Mia had grown extremely accustomed to.

She had been thrilled to place Dolohov in handcuffs, to spit in his face and tell him that finally (after four years of endless searching) Mia Lupin got the best of him.

_“You filthy little brat; I should’ve killed you years ago!”_

She’d slapped the handcuffs on him with extreme force and fervor, enjoying his arrest way too much.

_“Suck my dick Dolohov, you piece of shit.”_

 

_WINTER 2007_

“Good Morning listeners, this is Tenisha Copperpot on Wizard Wireless Network’s morning broadcast _Tea with Tenisha._ I’ve got a special guest here with me this morning; Mia Lupin, founder and chairman of The Lupin Foundation for Lycanthropy…”

Mia shifted awkwardly in her seat. She hated interviews, but being the founder and a chairman of a now well-known nonprofit foundation, she found herself being interviewed on the regular.

“Now Mia, tell me what’s new with The Lupin Foundation? I’ve heard you just finished building a new center?”

“Yes,” Mia cleared her throat “We just finished construction on our Nottingham center, which has capacity for 250 individuals at a time. We’re now running 4 centers in the UK, and plan on more here in the near future.”

“Exciting! And tell our listeners at home how exactly The Lupin Foundation came about? I believe your late husband was a werewolf?”

“He was, Remus spent most of his life ashamed and hiding his condition. Before wolfsbane was invented, he spent his transformations locked away in his cellar, where he had no control over his mind and would injure himself monthly. Once wolfsbane was created, he wasn’t able to afford it, and was still subject to injuring himself until he came to teach at Hogwarts, and a supply of potions was provided for him. Had he had access to this potion he couldn’t afford, and a safe place to transform without fear of hurting his friends or loved ones, it would’ve made his condition a lot easier to bear. I got the idea in my head to create a place like our shelters, and I invested my own money to get it started. Now, with sponsors like Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes and St. Mungo’s hospital, we can keep opening shelters and be a continuous resource for those that need us.”

“I see,” Tenisha leaned in towards Mia slightly “And let me ask you, your husband’s condition never frightened you? Never made you wary that he might hurt you?”

“No,” Mia let out a soft chuckle “I mean, it did come as a shock— I actually passed out for a moment when I learned of his affliction. However, Remus was a kind man, a gentle man. He would’ve never hurt me willingly, and I learned the Animagus transfiguration just in case we ever ran into a time period that he would have to go without wolfsbane. His condition didn’t change who he was as a person, just as all the werewolves out there shouldn’t be defined by their condition.”

“And what would you say about the werewolves that are still considered dangerous? The ones considered vicious?”

“There are bad people in this world,” Mia said with a shrug “there are bad werewolves in this world, just as there are good people and good werewolves. The terms ‘bad’ and ‘werewolf’ are not synonymous.”

“I like the way you described that Mia, thank you,” Tenisha flashed a pearly white smile “and how do you balance running the foundation with your personal life?”

“With _a lot_ of help,” Mia laughed “Remus and I have an 8-year old daughter, Grace, and I couldn’t raise her without the support system of friends that have become our family. I found out I was pregnant shortly after Remus died, and they have been there for me since day one. I also work as an Auror for the Ministry, so I certainly do keep busy.”

“Wow, you certainly do!” Tenisha said “Any time in your busy schedule for a little romance? Rumors have it that you and the Minister of Magic Kingsley Shacklebolt share a residence?”

Mia rubbed her neck instinctively; she wasn’t public about her mark— only those closest to her knew.

“No, romance isn’t in the cards for me. The Minister is a great friend, that’s all. We are both single parents, and we moved in together out of convenience. We help raise our children together.” 

“I see,” Tenisha said “Well, it looks like our time is almost up— is there anything you’d like to leave our listeners with?”

“Yes— any werewolf out there listening who is struggling with their condition, please come visit any of The Lupin Foundation centers. Everything is completely confidential. Come by for a hot meal and a cozy place to transform next full moon— you don’t have to be ashamed of your condition.”

 

 

_FALL 2010_

“Alright, Gracie, write if you need anything at all— I want a letter first thing tomorrow as to where you were sorted. You packed enough socks? Underwear?”

“Yes mum,” Grace rolled her bright blue eyes “I triple checked everything.”

“Ok sweetling,” Mia kissed Grace’s cheek and pulled her into a hug “I love you, give your Uncle Kingsley a hug before you go.”

“Love you,” Grace said, turning to Kingsley and giving him a tight hug “Bye Uncle Kingsley, love you.”

“Love you too Grace, we’ll see you at Christmas.”

“Grace, come on!” Reggie called. He was hanging out the train’s window, already dressed in his Hufflepuff robes. “You’re going to miss the train!”

The train whistled, alerting the families for last call boarding.

“Go on sweetheart, remember— I want an owl first thing tomorrow.”

“Yes mum,” Grace rolled her eyes again “bye!”

She trotted off, jumping onto the train and making her way to the same cabin car as Reggie. She stuck her head out the window grinning wide. The train started to take off slowly; Reggie waved wildly at her and Kingsley.

“Bye Dad! Bye Aunt Mia!”

“Bye Reggie, we love you!” Mia called.

Mia watched as her 11 year old daughter and her 13 year old godson’s heads out the window of the scarlet steam engine grew smaller and smaller, until the train was out of sight. She smiled with tears in her eyes, wishing they weren’t growing up so fast.

 

 

_LATER FALL 2010_

She wasn’t sure how she was having this vivid of a dream, but she wasn’t complaining. The comfort of her skin against Remus’s as they lay together wrapped in the smoothest white sheets she’d ever felt was exactly what she had needed.

God, she missed this; his bright blue eyes twinkling, the soft strokes of his thumb against her cheek, the way his sandy hair fell in his eyes as he lay on his side. They’d made love tenderly, taking their time to kiss and feel each other as if it was the very first time. What she wouldn’t give to have this dream become a reality.

“I miss you.” Mia said, staring into his eyes.

“I know.”

“I wish you hadn’t had to go,” she whispered “I wish we would’ve known—“

“Mia, you can’t keep beating yourself up,” Remus interrupted “We didn’t know you could block unforgivables then; however, I would die 1000 times over if it meant you could live. If it meant our daughter could live.”

“She looks so much like you,” Mia’s chin quivered “every time I look at her, you come to mind.”

“But she’s beautiful, like her mother.”

Mia smiled weakly as she reached out and pushed the hair out of Remus’s eyes.

“Why did you come to me tonight?” she asked “It’s been 12 years, why now?”

“With Grace going off to school, I knew how lonely you’d be. I knew you needed me now more than ever.”

“I always need you,” Mia said. They were silent for a moment, then, “Grace was sorted into Ravenclaw.”

“I know.”

Remus smiled proudly as he tucked a strand if Mia’s hair behind her ear. God— she really _had_ missed this, and he was right; she really had needed him now more than ever.

“I know this isn’t real— that this is just in my head— but I’m so happy you came to see me.”

Remus chuckled softly “of course it’s happening in your head, but why does that mean that it isn’t real?”

She took a moment to process this statement, and then kissed him gently. When she pulled away, “Please don’t make me wake up yet,” she pleaded softly “I’m not ready for you to go just yet.”

“We still have some time before you will wake.”

“Make love to me,” she whispered. “Please Remus—make love to me again.”

He smiled, then pressed his lips to hers as he snaked a hand into her hair. He rolled on top of her, and she spread her legs to allow his body to mold into hers. She clung onto him for dear life, never wanting this dream to end.

 

_SUMMER 2017_

“Kids! Come on, get washed up for dinner! Rachel, quit picking on him! Jesus— sorry Mia, the kids are driving me _insane_.”

“Well, that’s your own fault for having 4 kids,” Mia laughed

“Blame Eric, I told him I was fine with stopping at two, but he insisted we keep going.”

Mia leaned against the kitchen counter, amused at the background noise over the phone as she conversed with Penelope. Mia only got to travel to America a few times a year, but she and Penelope had made it a habit years ago to speak on the phone at least twice a week.

“MACUSA is hiring a bunch of obliviators here in the tri-state area; I’m going to start working for them once the kids go back to Ilvermorny.”

“That’s awesome,” Mia said “Sounds like a great opportunity.”

“Thanks— how is the foundation coming along?”

“Good, we just opened our Glasgow location, and Belfast is scheduled to open next month.”

“Aw Mia that’s great, really great— Grace has stepped up, yeah?”

“Yeah, I’ve decided it’s time for me to take a back seat role. She’s exceptionally bright, she’d do a wonderful job. She has the board’s full support, so here in the next year I’d like her to take over for me fully.”

“So, you retire from the Ministry last Christmas, and _now_ you want to retire from the foundation? What do you plan on doing then?”

Mia switched the phone from her left ear to her right. “Well, McGonagall sent me an owl…”

“Yeah? What for?”

“She wants me to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts.”

“Oh wow, that would be amazing for you! Are you going to?”

“I don’t know,” Mia said, chewing on her bottom lip “I haven’t decided.”

“I think you should, you have so much you can give. Plus, how appropriate— its Remus’s old post.”

“I know, I think that’s why I’m weird about it.”

“That position isn’t jinxed anymore,” Penelope laughed “wasn’t Felicity Hodgkins in that role since the war ended?”

“Yeah, she’s retiring now, so it’s time to bring someone else in.”

“Well, I think you’d be perfect for the job. When does she need her answer by?”

“Next week.”

“Do it, take it— RYAN, LEAVE YOUR SISTER ALONE! Jesus, you’d think my kids were still toddlers—I’ve got to go. Mia, take the post, really.”

“I’ll think about it,” Mia said, now chuckling “go deal with your heathens.”

“Alright, give Grace my love— RACHEL! My god I swear—“

Penelope hung up the phone suddenly, leaving Mia laughing into the receiver.

 

_FALL 2017_

Mia smiled at the emerald green couch situated against the stone wall of her new office, adjacent to the office door. She’d specifically requested this couch; she’d put it in her employment contract that she needed this sofa. McGonagall must’ve thought she was insane, but she went through the entirety of Hogwarts’s storage to find it.

Mia unpacked her photo frames and placed them on her desk, admiring a picture of her and Grace on holiday in Cincinnati visiting Penelope and Eric, and a wedding photo of her and Remus, hugging and spinning around for the camera. All the rest of her treasured photos were tucked in her photo album at the bottom of her trunk, underneath a few sets of staff robes and her few favorite blouse and skirt combinations. It was surreal to be here, to have accepted the position that Remus held 24 years ago.

24 years. 24 years it had been since the first time she had laid eyes on him, dressed in tattered robes that left her curious. 24 years since she first sat in his classroom, admiring the way he taught with such enthusiasm and skill. 24 years since they’d fallen in love within the walls of this castle, bonding their souls together forever. 24 years was a long time. She’d been without Remus much longer than she’d been with him, but she missed him all the same. She missed his laugh, his smile, the way his sandy hair would fall into his eyes when he was in need of a haircut.

She got pieces of him within their daughter. They had the same hair color, the same eyes— despite her inheriting Mia’s nose, lips and body figure, her smile was all Remus. It made her heart melt every time Grace smiled, for it was indeed the most beautiful smile she’d ever seen.

A knock at the door made her jump slightly. She looked up from her photographs, happy to see the knock came from Neville Longbottom. She was thrilled to be working with her old friend again— she and Harry had missed him and Ron from the Auror department when both of them had retired 3 years ago.

“Hey Mia, settling in alright?” Neville asked

“Yes, thank you,” Mia said, smiling “I’m a bit nervous for class Monday, if I’m being honest.”

“What? You?” Neville let out a soft chuckle “You’re the toughest witch I’ve ever known. Surely a bunch of kids don’t scare you.”

“This was Remus’s old post,” Mia gestured to the entire office around them “This was his old office, his domain. I know he only held the post a year and that was ages ago, but I want to do his legacy justice.”

“You will, McGonagall wouldn’t’ve requested you if she didn’t think you were right for the job,” Neville smiled “Let me know if you need anything from the greenhouses for your lessons, that or I can grow anything special for you.”

“Thanks Neville,” she nodded “I’ll see you at the sorting ceremony tonight? Will you sit next to me?”

“Absolutely,” Neville winked “I’ll save your seat.”

 

Monday morning, Mia paced in her office, nervous for her first class. She had the first years first; they should be easy, right? 11-year olds would be eager to learn, eager to start their lessons. At least she hoped.

She picked up the photograph of her and Remus on their wedding day, staring at the two of them swirling around and around with smiles on their faces. She brought the photo to her lips, placing a kiss to it then whispering as if it could hear her.

“Forever and Always, my love.”

Standing at the front of the classroom, she was pleased to see the first years filing in looked eager and excited to be there.

“Aunt Mia!”

Rose Weasley ran up to her, throwing her arms around her and hugging her tightly.

“Hi Rosie,” Mia said with a soft giggle. “Go take your seat; we’ll chat after class, yeah?”

Rose took her seat amongst the rest of the students. Mia smiled at the Gryffindor first years before her, nodding to them as she addressed the class for the first time.

“Hi class, I’m Professor Mia Lupin— Order of Merlin First Class, Retired Auror, founder and chairman of The Lupin Foundation for Lycanthropy—“

A cracking series of pops erupted from one of the tables, followed by a couple boys snickering. Mia flexed her hand, and a small object flew across the room and into her palm.

“Expert in wandless magic— ahh, one of the new Portable Popping Paperweights from Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes? These little guys are fun; however, I will be keeping this until the end of class.”

The group of boys slumped in their chairs. Mia chuckled under her breath; they looked like they were going to be a fun pain-in-her-ass group for the next seven years.

“Uh, Professor Lupin?” a girl in the back called, her hand raised in the air.

“Yes, Miss…?”

“Smith; is it true that you dueled the dark wizard Voldemort during the battle of Hogwarts 19 years ago?”

Mia smiled, albeit a weak one, at the memory. “Yes Miss Smith, that is true. Any other questions before we begin our lesson?” The group shook their heads. “Excellent.”

Mia set the Portable Popping Paperweight down on an empty table, and then stepped behind an ornately carved oak podium. She waved her hand over her teaching textbook; it flipped open to the starting page for their first lesson.

“Alright class, let’s turn to page 394.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH an era of my life is ending with this fic LOL. I'm very sad to be putting Mia and her story on a shelf in my brain. Forever wishing she was canon, so I could write about her again. I enjoyed her so much.
> 
> I would love if you checked out some of my other works if you enjoyed my writing! I've got a few other pieces to devour of some different pairings if anyone's interested.
> 
> Thanks again for reading; I know my thanks are getting redundant, but there are literally not enough thanks in the world. We writers are needy creatures, and people reading my work makes me so happy. Love you all!


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